Awwww...that was just so incredibly sweet.
Aww! I love the once-reluctant-daddy. The little bath and bed time ritual is adorable, along with the hair coming.
This made me laugh out loud:
"...he was more than a handful, he was a bloody vocation." Haha!
Of course, the food hoarding is really sad. I hope Harry will feel safer soon.
| Title: Afterword
| 15 Oct 2008 2:30 am
|
| Reviewer: Livi (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Pickle! Oh, how lovely! But, alas, my apple crisp, your over-large error causes me to crease my brow most tragically for one so young and carefree. For 'over large' should be hyphenated, and you neglected your hyphen!
I like the epithets you choose for Harry, but be sure not to overuse them. Also, you left out a truly irreplaceable comma in the sentence 'Eyes on the small marks Snape sank back down into his chair.' This sounds like 'Eyes on the small marks' is Snape's name. Very First Nation of you, but not terribly accurate. You need a comma when you add a dependent clause to a sentence, whether at the beginning or end. In this case, it goes after 'marks.' Bye!
| Title: Afterword
| 31 May 2007 2:53 am
|
| Reviewer: MorwenIsilwen (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Don't aspire to be like me, child.
That is the perfect line for Severus. This whole chapter makes me cry everytime I read it. This is so beautiful.
Aww he hid food. Smart kid, even if that is really sad that he would feel like he had to do that to keep from going hungry. Nice Job!
|