Is there going to be a sequel? This is a very good story! O PLEASE have a sequel!
| Title: Chapter 20
| 29 Mar 2007 8:43 pm
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| Reviewer: Jazz (Anonymous)
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This fic seems like it really has a lot of potential and I'm sure that you are a great writer. However, I find that this fic lacks emotion. Its like the characters, especially Harry, are nothing more then puppets. They can be made to do what they their master pleases but are unable to show emotions. For me emotions are key when I am reading something and as this fic has not a drop I must leave stop reading here; I just cant force myself to go on.
The ending of this really needs some expansion. There seem to be several threads hanging. Did Draco give Harry the potion? Your characterization of Draco is uneven. We don't know what happened to Lucius. What was the reason for the death of Trelawney and the appearance of the new teacher? And we have no feeling of the purpose for Harry's vampirism. Even his relationship with Severus is a little sketchy.
Uncle Vernon selling drills to wizards! Snort!
| Title: Chapter 14
| 29 Mar 2007 8:18 pm
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| Reviewer: Jazz (Anonymous)
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Well it seems a bit pointless to say this now as you already on chapter 40 or something but harry is taking things WAY to well. what does he have like no emotions or something? this is more then a little ridiculous.
Now why in the world would Draco sulk?? And the new divination teacher is interesting. Was Trelawney killed so that she could infiltrate the school, or is something else going on? On to the next chapter.
I'm enjoying you playing with poor Harry and putting him through this misery.
"Molly Weasley making sure that her husband didn't put any flying charms on it."
THis is an incomplete sentence. I think you want to say "Molly Weasley must have made sure..."
If all the chapters are this short, the 40 chapters will fly by. I noticed the fatherly touch of Snape telling Harry to comb his hair. I'll also be interested to see how you use Harry's ability to dream the past.
Hhmm. I can't remember if I have read this story yet. I'm glad Jan was able to find it for you again. I must confess to a guilty enjoyment of Snape-as-Vampire stories. Off to read!
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