I like set-up. Spending a bit/lot of time on set up's better than jumping headfirst into the main point of the story, imo.
Reading the first person style's a bit weird (I just never really read it, so it takes some getting used to), but I like your Bellatrix, and how you show her thought processes
Author's Response: I'm glad to hear that you don't think set-up is a waste of time! I know there are people who are disappointed that we don't meet Harry or Snape until a few chapters in.
I'm also glad that you don't find my Bellatrix too much of a turn-off as a narrator, because she's kind of crazy and murderous. I was afraid the audience might get sick of her.
Thanks for reviewing!