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Reviews For The Veil
"Meet who? Merlin.” - I froze again I can tale you that you suprice me quite! I was wonder will it be another world out there, but Camelot? Wow...
I'm curious what happened to Sev and Harry... Author's Response: Thank you The next chapter will enlighten you.
Author's Response: Thank you
Author's Response: Thank you
Author's Response: Thank you
Another problem in the story thus far is that you summarize a great deal. In the first couple of chapters, I thought perhaps you were summarizing the action because this was more-or-less a prologue and you'd be getting the the main story later. However, at 4 chapters in, you are still summarizing a lot of the action for us, rather than letting the reader see it unfold on the page. It would help if you used less passive voice. This story is difficult to rate, because the plot is great and the the writing, on a sentence by sentence basis, is good, yet the pacing is pedantic and occasionally the action is slightly off and confusing. Author's Response: Thank you Have taken your comments on board.
xx Author's Response: Thank you
Author's Response: Thank you. It's almost here and others in progress. |
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