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Reviews For A Chance at Love
Author's Response: I will, I'm already working on the next chapter.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it!
Author's Response: But it fits with Albus, the old man is just like that at times.
A couple things though...make sure you check your grammar as a few words were misused and a few sentences didn't make sense. I had to re read the sentences a few times for clarification. Also, the speech of the boys is a bit distracting. As an educator who has been around small children I personally have not heard them speak like that. I will agree they speak in an adorable manner but they do not all speak in that much baby speak. It would have been refined if they were attending school. However, it is fan fiction and you may portray them and their speech anyway you like. Again overall great update :) Author's Response: Thanks for being a reader. I go back and check and try to get the majority of the mistakes, but it's fanfic. If I really tried to make sure that every chapter was 100% corrected I would lose the will to even do the story. When it starts becoming too much work, I just stop. As for the speech of the boys, funny you should mention that. I read your comment the day I went away to summer camp trying to figure out if I was indeed babying them. I worked with kids from 5-12 this summer and I met quite alot who still spoke like this. My 7 year olds notoriously had the most in the group, out of the 18 we had, 10 spoke just like I have my boys do. As I said before it's fanfic, I suppose I can try to change the way Draco and Neville somewhat, but Harry's is going to stay the way it is. Sorry, but it's my story.
Author's Response: It will get better I promise..
Author's Response: They do have proper speech, have you ever been around five year olds? They talk adorable, especially when their relaxed and let their guard down. This was addressed in the first few chapters, when their speech goes back to formal their obviously uncomfortable but even then they'll still have imperfect speech as their five. Harry's is worse foe obvious reasons, his is a delay theyres are like small lisps. I can't it explain it, unless you ve spent some time with the year group.
Author's Response: I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I figured it was something he would do, And I can see Sirius reacting even worse later on down the line, at least this way he'd have someone who would have bene their too. Neville and Remus will get their healing just as soon as Remus gets his head around the sotuation and Neville stop distancing himself. |
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