|
Reviews For Snape's Waifs
Author's Response: And thank you for the R&R! I'll get more up as soon as I can.
Author's Response: Yeah, it is a rather common trope and an obvious set up, but I'm confident that if nothing else, the rest of the story shall have my own twist. Thanks for the R&R. Glad you enjoyed this first chapter.
Author's Response: I'm glad to hear it! I'll try not to keep you waiting too long. Thanks for the feedback!
Author's Response: Most definitely! I'll be sure to complete the next chapter as soon as I'm able. Thanks for the R&R. ^^
Love how Snape designated authority to the upper levels! I'm not sure if you are a nitpicker like I am, but if you want constructive criticism, I might change this sentence: 'Harry tried to keep his attention focused on writing somewhat legible notes but it was somewhat hard to do' just change the second somewhat to something else. Ahh, I see another POV change, maybe put a breaker there? Just to make it more obvious. Love his genuine concern for Harry, :) Very nice first chapter, I also like that he didn't just leave Harry in the Hospital Wing while the examination was going on, that would have been like washing his hands of him. Thank you for sharing! Author's Response: Oh, yeah. Totally missed the 'somewhats'. I may eventually add in another break somewhere in the mess of POV flopping, but I shall leave it for now. And Snape does care, even if he is a bit emotionally constipated still. :P He's a slightly softer Snape than I usually stop with - the reasons for which shall be revealed as the story goes on. It was also important that he didn't just abandon Harry to the mediwitch, as you say. Thank you for the great feedback - I'm glad you enjoyed the first chapter! <3
Author's Response: Thank you! Harry will be making their acquaintance in the next chapter, though it probably won't be till after that names get passed around. Thanks so much for the R&R!
Author's Response: Thanks, Lyza! I'm glad you liked it.
So many emotions! I was so absorbed in the Hospital Wing scene, and I really hope Severus can keep his promise! An interesting start, for sure. I'm looking forward to see how all this unfolds. Author's Response: Yay! Yeah, Sev's kids help him out, as they sometimes notice things that he misses from the head table and the front of a classroom. I apologize for the fluctuating POVs - I do know better than that - however, it felt important to have them, but I didn't want to break the scene as I felt that would push readers out of the story more. Hopefully it wasn't too, too confusing! Severus is definitely going to do his utmost! He's very protective of his kids, but more on that next chapter. Thanks for the feedback! |
Powered by eFiction 3.5 |