What Might Have Been by Leggylover03
Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.
Categories: Parental Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Dumbledore, Lily, Lucius, McGonagall, Molly, Ron, Voldemort
Snape Flavour: None
Genres: Angst, Drama
Media Type: None
Tags: Alternate Universe, Child fic
Takes Place: None
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 46 Completed: No Word count: 79855 Read: 157721 Published: 05 May 2006 Updated: 01 May 2010
Chapter 16 by Leggylover03

The next two weeks went by with Harry simply going through the motions everyday. Sure, he ate and sat on the couch reading his books, but he had yet to speak. Severus had tried everything to get Harry to speak, but nothing worked. He had asked about a trip to Diagon Alley, and he and Harry had gone, but the sights and sounds, and even the ice cream, had brought no words from the child.

On the start of the third week, lines of worry could clearly be seen on Severus' face. Harry had refused to do anything for his birthday, even refused the cake made by Lucy, and simply went to bed early that night. Severus did not know why the child had gone to bed, for it had been weeks since Harry had slept all night. What worried Severus most was that even in waking from his nightmares Harry did not call out like before; he would get up from his bed and walk into Severus' room, and Severus would wake to Harry clutching his nightshirt, trembling beneath the covers.

Harry, he knew, had loved Hagrid once he had gotten over the initial shock. So Severus arranged for them both to have dinner at Hogwarts that night. Harry got dressed and held Severus' hand as the flooed over, but he did not have the same smile that he had always had when Dumbledore came to greet them.

"Severus, so nice of you to join us this evening."

"Thank you, headmaster. Is Hagrid here as well?"

Severus did not miss the small look of joy on Harry's face, but it was all too soon gone. Albus led them both through the double doors of the Great Hall and, indeed, Hagrid, along with McGonagall, was waiting inside.

Severus himself was pratically thrown to the side when Hagrid came barreling over and enveloped Harry in a bone crushing hug.

"How are you, Harry?"

Hagrid got no response from Harry other than the half smile. When Hagrid looked to Severus for an explanation, Severus hunched his led Harry over to the long table and sat him down, filling his plate with various things.

While Harry was being coddled by Hagrid and Minerva, Dumbledore motioned Severus over by the door.

"Severus, is there still no improvement?"

"None, headmaster."

"I do not understand what has brought about this sudden change in him. He seemed like such a carefree child, so warm and loving. Have you any ideas, Severus?"

Severus occluded his mind swiftly, before Dumbledore could sense his lie before he spoke it.

"I do not know what troubles him, but he has been this way since he saw Draco and Lucius."

Dumbledore's face clouded over with thought.

"What were Lucius and Draco doing at your house? I daresay it was not what I am thinking."

"You are indeed correct about Lucius' coming to the house; he spoke freely of the Dark Lord and how Harry would make a good Death Eater someday."

Dumbledore frowned at this, though he had no idea of the full story, and Severus was not about to tell him for fear of reprocussions.

"Perhaps Harry could do with a change of friends. Draco is still young and, therefore, will follow his father's lead. I hope there is hope for him yet, but why not expose Harry to other children."

"I will take this into consideration, Headmaster."

Severus and Harry sat and listened to all the start of term discussions. It was but a mere three weeks away, and Severus had not thought of his plans once. Usually he was diligent in making things out a month ahead of time, but the problem with Harry had kept him busy.

He excused himself and Harry after dessert and waited while Minerva and Hagrid hugged Harry goodbye. The child not not return the hug, but simply stood there like a rag doll, limp, hands at his side. It was disheartening, and Severus knew he would have to think hard on Dumbledore's suggestion.

When Severus stepped from the floo, Harry followed and plopped himself down on the couch, taking his book off the coffeetable and starting to read, ignoring everyone else. He had only gotten three pages into the book when his eyes started to droop and he fell asleep.

Severus wanted to put him in his bed, but Harry looked so peaceful there on the couch that he had not the heart to move him. Instead, he covered Harry with a blanket and then, bidding Lucy a good night, went to bed.

Upon entering his room, Severus made sure to leave his door open so he could hear Harry should he wake. To be honest with himself, Severus was starved for sleep. Each night Harry bolted into his room, waking him, and every night he had rocked the quivering child back to sleep. Tonight he hoped for eight hours of uninterrupted sleep, but not too long after his eyes had closed, he heard whimpers coming from down the hall.

Severus groaned and then rose from his bed. He heard the whimpering become louder and louder, and knew Harry was in the midst of another of his nightmares. Severus wanted to comfort him, wanted to make all the bad images go away, but though Harry would not tell him what plagued his dreams; Severus had a good idea, all the same.

When Severus made it to the couch, he saw Harry sitting up, eyes wide with fear, tears rolling down his face and dripping off his chin onto his knees. He was curled up into a protective ball, clutching at the blanket, until Severus sat down beside him.

Harry leapt from his position and latched onto Severus' nightshirt, holding on for dear life. This was not some ordinary dream, this was worse. Little by little, Severus coaxed Harry's fingertips from his shirt, and soon he was holding Harry's hand, while rubbing his back with the other. Harry's brow was soaked in sweat, his eyes puffy from crying, and Severus wanted to reach inside and pull all the hurt out.

He sat there for an hour rocking Harry, whispering to him that it would be all right.

"I am here, Harry; I am not going anywhere," he said, hoping it would somehow get through to the still trembling child.

Just before dawn, an exhausted Severus watched as Harry relaxed in his arms. Carefully easing out from under him, Severus walked into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of black coffee. Sitting down, Severus placed his head in his hands, rubbing his temples, trying to stave off the headache forming from his lack of sleep.

' What am I going to do?' he thought and only realized he had spoken outloud when Lucy came over to his chair.

"Is there something I can help sir with?"

Severus shooed Lucy away and drank down the last of the bitter coffee. He was about to get up when an idea struck him. It was a horrible one. One he loathed to do. To be honest Severus would rather face down twenty dementors than this, but if it was for Harry then he would do anything.

Walking over to the floo, Severus rubbed his eyes and tried to clear his mind. He ran his hand through his hair and placed what he hoped was a congenial look on his face. Then throwing the powder in the floo, he called out, "The Burrow."

To be continued...


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