July, 1980

“Lily, you have to push.”

“Not until Poppy gets here!” Curls of red hair, dampened by sweat, stuck to her face as she glared at her husband.

“Lils, honey… we went through this already. There was another Death Eater attack and Poppy was the last medi-witch they had. She can’t be here. You have to cooperate with me because I got two of you here,” the raven haired James Potter said with an outward air of calmness. He kept up a strong front while he panicked inwardly and his stomach felt as if it were twisted in on itself.

“How is Marguerite?” Lily asked, reminded of her sister-in-law.

“I’m fine, Lily. Let my brother take care of you first. You’re further along than I am.” James’s twin sister, Marguerite, started her contractions a few hours after Lily and she patiently dealt with her own pain on the bed next to them.

“Lily, I need you to push now!” James yelled, counting in his head and knowing a contraction was coming. Lily did as she was told with a great pained groan and then flopped back against the pillows that supported her. Tears filled her eyes as she feared for her child and herself. In these dark times when it was risky to go to a hospital and most medi-witches and wizards were busy with attacks, more and more people were stuck with the choices of home births or muggle hospitals. She wished they’d chosen a muggle hospital.

“That was a good push, honey. I can see hair, lots of red hair. One more push should do the trick. Our baby is on the way!” With that encouragement, Lily braced herself and pushed until she couldn’t anymore and she heard a sharp intake of breath from James.

“James, let me see our baby. I want to hold our-”

“Hold on, darling. I need to put you under so you can recoup some of your own magic first. The birth has exhausted you. I’ll clean her up so you can hold her when you wake.” And without waiting for any response, he raised his want and spoke softly and Lily fell asleep.

“James?” Marguerite’s concern raing clearly through her own pain.

“It’s a girl… looks just like her mummy. She- she didn’t make it. I think she died a few hours ago during that back contraction that Lily said didn’t feel right.” His voice was monotone as he held his baby in shocked sorrow. “I… I couldn’t let Lily know yet.”

“Oh, James… I’m so sor- oh- ungh!” Her sympathetic words were cut off by her own sob of pain. Her voice struck James hard and he was at his sister’s bed as soon as he gently laid his lost daughter down next to her mother.

“James, James, I want my husband,” she cried.

“Sister, he’s gone right now. You know he can’t leave his spy position at this moment.”

“No, you don’t understand. Something is wrong. I need Severus!”

“He’s not here. You have to stay strong and deliver a child for him to come home to,” James comforted his crying sister. He got down to the foot of the bed to check on her progress.

“You seem fully dilated now. Push during the next contraction,” he instructed.

When the next one came, Marguerite took a breath and pushed, urgring the little life to come out and see the world. A peek of black hair and then it disappeared.

“It’s got hair, I saw that much. What names did you and Severus pick out?” James asked, calming his sister when the contraction ended.

“Harold Elias for a boy. Rose Calypso for a girl.” Marguerited panted. The next contraction came and James urged her to push again. This time the black haired head appeared again, accompanied with shoulders. Then everything stilled and was silent.

“Margot?” James used the childhood nickname for his sister. She didn’t answer. She didn’t move. The partly exposed baby squirmed in discomfort.

James felt the panic building in his body, but there was another life besides his sister’s at stake and he knew he’d never be forgiven by her if he let her child die. Pulling himself together then, he reached and gently pulled the baby from his sister. He cut the cord and didn’t take the time to rejoice at the first cries of life that the baby let out.

“Lay here, little one,” he whispered, setting the shaking infant on the bed. He went to the head of the bed. “Marguerite?” he asked. Nothing. At a closer and more thorough examination, he saw there was no breath, no pulse, no life. His sister was gone.

“No… Margot, no!” He cried, clutching her to his chest. “I lost my own daughter. I can’t lose my dear sister, my other half!”

He would have stayed there forever, wife and nephew forgotten in his grief for the only person who had been with him for all but the first three minutes of his life and who owned half of his soul if it hadn’t been for the cries of the infant on the bed that pierced through his consciousness. Margot’s son. Severus’s son. James’s and Lily’s nephew.

“Little boy,” he sniffled, letting his sister go and picking up the baby. He cradled him and started almost in awe of the tragic event that had just taken place. His daughter was dead. His sister was dead. This boy was alive. Lily was asleep. Severus was away. The boy’s mother was dead and his father was gone. The facts ran around in James’s head.

He set the baby down again, this time on Lily’s bed and he picked up his stillborn dauther. August Flora they’d agreed on for a girl. He hugged the little body to himself and then put her next to Marguerite. He put a hand on his sister’s head.

“Take care of my baby girl.”

Then he said a small prayer and got his wand out. He recited the proper spell and the bodies vanished in flame. It was too dangerous to bury bodies with proper ceremonies these days. It was too dangerous for most activities that people took for granted.

He let out a shuddering breath, knowing he’d never see his daughter or sister again, and he turned back to where his wife and nephew lay. He picked up the baby once again and brought him into the connecting bathroom. He washed him by hand, magic being hazardous to use on newborns, and then swaddled him in a warm blanket.

The events of the night ran through his head with several facts sticking out boldly: His daughter was dead, his sister was dead and her husband was gone, his nephew was alive and here.

All sense of right and wrong flew out the window. James never would have been able to explain his reasoning for what he did next, but it didn’t matter because nobody else had any knowledge of it happening.

This baby was all that James had left of his sister. He lost his daughter too and he was feeling selfish.

The baby looks like a Potter… but equally he looked like a Snape.

In that moment, James forgot any dangers or risks and he exposed the infant to magic. He used every spell he knew to hide any traits that showed the baby as a Snape. The last to go was the baby’s dark brown, almost black, eyes… now vibrant green.

“James?” The soft voice of Lily startled the man. She had awakened from the sleeping spell.

“You have a son.” He handed her the tiny bundle.

“I thought you saw red hair. I thought we had a girl. This little boy’s hair is as black as yours and Marguerite’s,” Lily smiled, twirling a lock of the dark hair on the baby’s head.

“I was wrong. The excitement…” James whispered, voice trailing off. It was then that Lily noticed the silence save for the little breaths of the black haired baby.

“What’s wrong? Where’s Marguerite… and her baby?”

“They didn’t make it.”

“Oh no! James, no! Severus will be devastated. His whole family gone.”

“Yes.” James nodded, now realizing the he’d ruined the life of the man his sister loved.

“We must name this one Harry… after the child he lost.” Lily said in a determined voice. He nodded at her again and she spoke once more, “… and James… after you, my wonderful husband.”

“Yes. It’s a wonderful name. Harry James Potter.”

James then excused himself to the bathroom where he felt his knees go weak under the weight of what he’d done. He grasped the porcelain sink until his knuckles were white and he looked at his face in the mirror, disgusted by what he saw. He saw a man who stole a baby. And he couldn’t go back on it without breaking Lily’s heart.

“Severus will never know.”

Many years later…

Severus Snape, potions master by eighteen, husband by nineteen, and widower by twenty-one, now sat at his desk in the dungeons of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry looking much older than his age of thirty-four years. He was grading papers from the school year that would determine the final passing or failing grades for his potions students.

He was well aware that the other professors had finished grading before him, but he liked to be meticulous. Every detail must be picked apart, misspelled words corrected, ingredient reactions details to the end but not to the point of rambling. Potions was more of an exact and precise artwork than any of the other subjects and he felt it should be given the attention it deserved.

With one last slash over a whole paragraph and one bright red ‘T’ grade given, he was finally finished. He closed his ink bottle and wiped his quill clean. He set both on the shelf behind his seat and stiffened with surprise when he heard the whooshing sound of someone flooing into his office. Turning slightly, he relaxed a fraction when he was his own mentor step into the room. He nodded a respectful greeting.

“Headmaster.”

“Severus, I have an important matter to discuss with you.”

“Of course. Please do have a seat.” Severus kept his voice level and professional.

“Just two days ago, the ministry was made aware of magical happenings going on at the Potter property in Godric’s Hollow. Much research was done and after looking into the Potter histories and legal documents, it was made clear what was happening. The property was spelled with a powerful charm to make sure that it appeared to be demolished if anything were to happen to it’s owners. Only the next in line of Potters would be able to see through the spell and then rightfully claim the property. The problem is this… the spell was only made to last a few years, time enough for an heir of age to step forward. Unfortunately, the only Potter left was Harry and he was not (and still is not) old enough to step forward. An now… it seems the spell has fallen. After all this time… Godric’s Hollow still stands.”

Severus looked at the headmaster in disbelief.

“It stands… forgive me, Albus, but I fail to see what could possibly be gained by informing me of this discovery.”

“The façade over the property has fallen, but the wards have not and nobody has been able to enter the house. Severus, you know that aside from Harry, you are the closest relative to the Potters… through your marriage. Magic recognizes marital bonds as well as blood bonds. Someone needs to enter the house, see what has been hidden all these years, discover clues as to what happened that night, maybe find information to help with the future. You are the only one who could do this… besides Harry.”

“No… no. I cannot do what you ask. I lost all my family when I lost my wife and child. Marguerite was the only thing keeping us all together and I broke my ties from James and Lily after that day. Can you not send the boy?”

“Severus, we’ve no idea what lay inside. What if Harry should be the first to enter the house and find the remains of his parents? Would you subject a child to that?”

“No… not even Potter deserves that.” Severus sighed, “But if you are thinking that their bodies may still be there, then how did we ever find the young Mr. Potter?”

“I imagine the magic around the household must have been sensitive to the fact that Harry was just a baby, too young to care for himself, and therefore kept him out of the façade for us to see. Either that or Harry’s own magic had kicked in with the encouragement of self-preservation and made sure he would be seen and cared for.”

Severus signed, clenching and un-clenching his hands into fists.

“So you want for me to clear the place of anything that might shock or horrify the boy and you want information…” He looked down at his lap and gave another sigh before looking over at the headmaster through his eyelashes, “I will explore the damn house.”

-----

A night of drinking followed and ended when Severus threw the rest of his fire whiskey into the fireplace in a fit of rage. The following flames matched his mood and died down when he finally passed out on the sofa.

When morning arrived, Severus took a hangover potion and changed into a clean set of robes, foregoing a comforting shower for a refreshing spell instead. He buried his emotions as he had done every morning for thirteen years and then he set out to Godric’s Hollow for the first time since he lost his family.

Even with the knowledge of the spell over the property, Severus was still surprised when he was at the house. The walkway was brown and faded until about three feet from the house. The grass was still green in that area near the house while the rest of the yard was now mostly dirt with patches of crabgrass. It seemed that either the wards or the disguising spells had also been weaved with preservations spells because while everything outside of the spell area was aged and run-down, everything inside looked just as it had before.

The house itself was still in the same condition that it had been on that fateful night. It was still pristine white with deep red shutters and gold window frames. Most of the lights were still on and showed through the windows. The door was still crimson and almost perfect. As Severus approached and stepped through the wards with only the slightest bit of force, he gasped. Standing there in front of the door, he could see blackened blast marks from curses that had hit.

Bracing himself, Severus pushed the door open and entered into the living room and he gasped once again. The house still looked as if it were being lived in. Everything was in the same condition that it had been so long ago.

The room was still warm and inviting with the cream colored carpet and the dark orange and gold sofa and chairs. The fireplace was still roaring with a magical fire that emitted no smoke. The coffee table was cluttered with an old issue of The Daily Prophet, a pacifier, and a half empty bottle of milk. The mantle over the fireplace was filled with family photos. Some of Lily and James, others of them with Harry, and Severus was surprised to see more than one picture of Marguerite and himself together.

The only sign of disturbance was the ugly trail of muddy shoe or boot prints that lead from the door through the living room and into the kitchen.

Severus followed the trail, noticing that nothing was out of place in the kitchen. The trail continued on to the staircase that lead up to the second floor where the bedrooms were located. He slowly ascended the stairs as his mind flashed back to the time spent here with his expecting wife and their family.

Halfway up the stairs, he saw a silver hair clip on the floor. He picked it up, a lock of red hair still stuck to it. It was the dragonfly clip he’d gotten Lily for a birthday. It had obviously been pulled from her hair during a struggle.

With a bit more determination, he crept up the staircase. The muddy trail lead straight to the nursery. It was clear what the goal was. The door was open just a rack and Severus had to breathe deeply a few times before he was able to enter the room. Pushing the door open, he was relieved to see there were no remaining bodies of either James or Lily.

It was obvious that this was where the great even took place. There was a buzz of powerful magic from that night that still remained in the room. Looking around, Severus saw the crib that once held Harry was tipped over on it’s side, one blue blanket and a stuffed toy unicorn spilling out. Two blast marks stained the walls. The muddy boot prints circled, paced, then disappeared as they faced the crib.

Though it never should be considered such, Severus felt almost as if her were standing on holy ground. This was the very spot that Lily’s love for Harry had defeated the Dark Lord.

There was nothing of any use for him in the nursery though, so he left the room. He picked up the unicorn on his way out, not really knowing why. Back in the hallway, he glanced at the door that lead to the master bedroom, but found himself unable to enter the room where two births and two deaths had taken place. He headed instead to James’s old office. It was probably the best bet for some sort of notes or unsent owls that mind hold information not yet known to The Order.

The office was different than the last time he’d seen it. One desk and chair where there was once two. After both men had married and matured, they had reconciled their differences at the urging of both wives. In the last two trimesters of the pregnancies, Severus and Marguerite stayed with Lily and James. It was safer for Marguerite with Severus away so often on missions for Dumbledore.

On the corner of the big desk sat one picture of both couples together in the backyard. Both women very pregnant and both men obviously very much in love with their wives. Severus watched himself in the picture embracing Marguerite with his hands resting on her belly. The picture was taken the day before he left for another long mission. It was the last time they were together and the last time he ever really smiled.

With shaking hands, he took the picture and shoved it in the pocket of his robes. When he looked back up, he noticed the soft glow coming from a small closet. He remembered that James kept his pensieve there and it might have had useful information in it.

He pulled the small door open and saw the pensieve on the top shelf. He reached up and brought it down, intending to take it back to Albus Dumbledore. But as he carried it back to the desk, he saw the silvery shadow of a memory that took his breath away.

He could see the form of Marguerite lying sweaty and big bellied on a bed. Forgetting what he was at the house for, Severus thought only of seeing the wife and child he’d lost so long ago. In that frame of mind, he set the stone bowl down and freely fell into the memory.

The memory started in the middle of chaos. Lily was on one bed near Marguerite’s and she was in the middle of pushing out her baby. Severus stepped over to his wife.

“Margot,” he whispered reverently. He knew she couldn’t see or hear him, but he went through the motions of petting her wild hair and caressing her sweaty face for his own benefit.

In a moment, he realized that it had gotten too quiet. Marguerite obviously noticed the same thing because she turned her head and asked, “James?”

Severus turned and saw James standing over a sleeping Lily, baby in one arm and wand in the other. The baby had red hair and Severus knew Harry had been born with black hair just like his father. Maybe the Potters were supposed to have fraternal twins? It did run in the family…. But it didn’t look like another child would be coming.

“It’s a girl. Looks just like Lily. She didn’t make it. I think she…” The voice sounded hollow to Severus and anything else he said was tuned out as Severus tried to make sense of what just happened. He was only brought back when his own wife’s voice was cut off by a painful groan. He knew that two more deaths would soon be seen, but he needed the closure of saying goodbye. Tears filled the eyes of his that had been dry for so long as he hear Marguerite cry out for him.

“I’m here! I’m right here!” He shouted in vain. He watched as she flinched and then her eyes glazed over as her spirit left her body.

“Margot?” He and James said, simultaneously. There was no answer. Severus couldn’t bring himself to leave her side as James worked furiously to get the child out of her. He knew it was a lost cause that James was working on. But a small cry made Severus jump and his hair whipped as he spun around to face James and the baby.

“But… they told me it was stillborn…” he muttered. His legs felt weak as he stood and looked over James’s shoulder. The little infant he saw was his… and he was perfectly healthy. Ten fingers, ten toes, perfectly pink and full of life.

As he watched James in the memory, his grief and confusion soon turned to a feeling of betrayal that was stronger than any he’d felt before. The worst part was watching James apply all the different glamour charms. Knowing that James went to such lengths to keep the baby from his real father that he exposed the infant to such intense magic. Severus could only guess what that had done for the child’s growth and development in his growing years and he wouldn‘t know unless the glamours were removed.

After the final touch of green eyes, James stepped back and Severus saw the baby that he recognized to be Harry Potter.

Dumbly, Severus watched as James switched the Potter and Snape babies and spelled away the dead bodies. He saw Lily awaken and James hand Harry over to her, but he couldn’t hear any of the dialogue between them as an ocean roared in his ears. He felt himself walking with James into the bathroom and one thing penetrated all the noise in his head.

“Severus will never know.”

As the memory ended, Severus fell to his knees in the office. His first instinct was to find James and cast Cruciatus on him for his betrayal, but James was dead. There was no one left for Severus to blame and righteously take his anger out on.

His hands found the stuffed unicorn that he had taken from the nursery and he clutched it to his chest, breathing in the scent of his son. His last barriers fell and a sob ripped from him and his whole body wept. He shuddered with every breath and he held the stuffed toy for some sort of comfort.

The tears were from both joy and sorrow. Joy at the knowledge that his child had lived and still lives. Sorrow at the years he’d missed in raising his son. Sorrow at the horrible betrayal his brother-in-law had committed.

It seemed like ages past until he ran out of tears. He couldn’t cry anymore. His face felt swollen and his body buzzed. He felt detached for one full numbed minute until the shocking truth really slammed him in the gut.

Harry Potter is my son.

Somehow Severus did make it out of the house, unicorn and pensieve in hand, and he went straight to Hogwarts and to the headmaster’s office.

“Severus, please do come in. Did you find anything of use in Godric’s Hollow?” Albus greeted the man kindly as he appeared in the doorway.

“James Potter’s pensieve. I don’t know if there are any memories that could help you. I only saw one and it was of very personal nature,” Severus explained, setting the ceramic bowl on the desk. He then noticed that he was still holding the plush toy and seeing Albus’s raised eyebrows, knew it hadn’t escaped the notice of the older man.

“And what was this memory, if I may ask?”

“The birth of my son and the death of my wife… and of my niece.”

“Niece?”

“Lily Potter gave birth to a girl… she was stillborn. Marguerite died while giving birth to a healthy baby boy.”

“Severus, are you saying-”

“I’m saying James Potter switched the babies. Harry James Potter is Harold Elias Snape… my son.”

“Harry Potter is a carbon copy of James.”

“And James is a male copy of Marguerite… but even so, no child of two parents should be a copy of only one.”

“Neither you are Marguerite had green eyes.”

“James put glamours over any trait that could be considered a Snape one. It’s all in the pensieve.” Severus kept his head up and hid any emotion that could be considered weak. “Headmaster… Albus, I will be going to Privet Drive and I will retrieve what is rightfully mine.”

“Severus, Harry is not a possession for you to claim. He is a boy, a young boy that you seemed to despise until just now. How can you care for him with your past relationship being how it was?” Albus asked the obvious question as he circled his desk to stand in front of the troubled young man.

“I-…. I don’t- I can’t despise him.” Severus realized as he tried to find an explanation, “Albus, I don’t know him.” He collapsed into a chair. “I don’t know my son. I don’t hate him… I don’t know him, but he is my son and I will.. I do love him. I just don’t know yet if I will be able to like him. I’m not making any sense.” He buried his face in his hands.

“You will learn to like him as you get to know him. And I am confident that he will love you when he knows who you were and who you can be.”

“No… that boy hates me.”

“Harry is incapable of hate. He merely dislikes his potions master. He will overcome this… Harry has an astounding capability to forgive. I imagine that the knowledge of living family will be enough to start him down that path.”

“No, I can’t tell him. He can’t know until I have gained his trust so that I can explain how it all came to be this way. “

Albus leaned back against his desk and looked at Severus for a minute before nodding his head.

“Very well. That is your decision to make. I will take care of the legalities. I know some… very discreet people. How do you wish to explain to Harry why you now have guardianship of him?”

“I will simply inform him that it is no longer safe at the Dursley house and that it has been decided, for his own safety, that I will be taking care of him.” Severus paused. “It really is safer for him. The blood wards… they never would have worked if there had been any problems… Lily’s blood was never in him.”

“Then we are lucky that you found out now rather than later.”

“Then you agree, it is for the best. I will go now and make a place for him in my home. He will be with me by the end of this week.” Without any further words, Severus nodded his farewell and left the room.

----

At 4 Privet Drive in Surrey, Harry Potter was having a bad summer. Threatening the Dursleys with his newly discovered escaped convict godfather hadn’t worked out quite as well as he’d hoped. Apparently, Petunia had heard at least enough while growing up with Lily to know that wizards sent to Azkaban had their wands snapped. Therefore, she and Vernon feel that the threat of Sirius wasn’t much of one and for Harry’s threat, he was punished by having to move back into the cupboard for the rest of the summer.

The cupboard seemed too cramped at first and Harry realized that he must have grown since he’d been moved from the cupboard. It was a small and welcome distraction as Harry thought he hadn’t grown at all because he was still the shortest in his class. But small and cramped as the space was, he soon got used to it and grew to like the safety that he felt in it’s confines.

A few days after summer started, Harry realized that it would be a bad one. He was ignored and left in the cupboard except for bathroom breaks for the first two days. On the third, he was given a small meal and a list of chores. In between chore/meal days, he was given fruit wedges and he drank water during his bathroom breaks

Any other summer, Harry was used to being mildly neglected and overworked, but Vernon had made Harry send Hedwig away for the whole summer so the Dursley’s knew that there would be no way for Harry to inform anyone of their stepped up mistreatment.

This continued up until one morning in the middle of July.

Harry awoke feeling sticky with sweat as the central air conditioning never really reached inside of his cupboard. He heard a voice coming from the front room and it wasn’t any of the Dursleys. His first thought was that the house was being robbed, but then he recognized the person as the voice got closer.

“Professor Snape!” Harry yelled out. He didn’t care at the moment that the person on the other side of the door usually seemed to hate him as much as his relatives. So far, in the three years that he’s known him, the professor had not tried to lock him in anywhere or starve him. As much as the man seemed to hate Harry, he’d always ended up saving his life at least once a year.

“Potter, where are you?” Severus had come to the house and found it empty when he’d knocked on the door, but the general location charm he’d used said that Harry was somewhere in the house so he entered on his own.

“Cupboard under the stairs.” Harry called out. Severus smirked and leaned against the staircase railing, thinking to himself that things never seemed to change. At Hogwarts, Harry was always getting himself in trouble or running into danger. And here on summer holiday, somehow the boy had managed to get himself stuck in a cupboard.

“How did you get yourself locked in there?” Severus asked as he brought his wand up. He muttered, “Alohamora” and the locks gave way. When the door swung open, the smirk fell from his face. Harry wasn’t just stuck in the cupboard, he was sitting on a worn mattress in what looked to be a makeshift bedroom.

“What is this? You sleep here?” He asked. He saw Harry’s face flush with embarrassment and that was answer enough for him.

Harry was grateful for the fresh cool air that the open door brought in, despite his embarrassment at being found like this, but he couldn’t help but wonder why the professor was even there at all.

“Professor, is there something wrong? Why are you here?” he asked as he crawled out of the small space and stood to his full height.

“It is no longer as safe in this house as was though-” Severus was interrupted for a moment by a small snort form Harry, “and so it has been decided that I am to be your new guardian.”

“My new… what?” Harry asked, dumbly. For a moment he thought his professor just claimed to be his new guardian.

“Are you deaf as well as blind?” Severus asked, pausing to wonder if Harry’s eyeglasses were because of Harry’s own bad eyesight or another spell cast by James. He sighed and shook his head. “Yes, I’m your guardian. We’ll be leaving right away as soon as you pack.”

“Yes, sir.” Harry nodded, obediently. He reached back into the cupboard and pulled his trunk from a corner at the foot of the mattress. Then he grabbed a knapsack and the old beat up pillow from the bed.

“You will, of course, be provided with pillows in your new room,” Severus commented with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh, I just… it’s something familiar,” Harry explained as he clutched the pillow to his chest. “Well, this is it. I’m ready, I mean. I like to keep my clothes packed at all times just in case…”

“In case…?”

“Well, summer before second year, the Weasley’s broke me out and I had to pack quite quick. Last summer… well, I had to leave quickly then, too.”

Severus knew of Harry’s stay with the Weasley’s that summer, but was a little wary of how Harry phrased his departure from Privet Drive. He was also pretty sure that the boy’s trouble with under-age magic the year before had to do with his hasty trip to Diagon Alley. There wasn’t much about the boy that the professor’s didn’t know about.

“What of your other belongings?” Severus asked, furrowing his brows at the boy standing in front of him.

“Other?”

“Yes, Mr. Potter. Toys, knick-knacks, anything else that children collect these days,” Severus sighed, “You won’t be returning here, so don’t forget anything.”

“Oh, it’s all here in my trunk. Really, this is it. I’m ready.” Harry was embarrassed by his lack of personal belongings, but was eager to be anywhere that was away from Privet Drive even if that meant staying with Snape.

“Very well.” Severus nodded. He pulled out a wand and shrank Harry’s trunk for travel and handed it to Harry. Then he pulled a can out of his pocked and held it out for Harry to grab onto.

“Irn-Bru?” Harry asked, confused.

“It’s a portkey. Grab hold and don’t let go.”

“Sir?”

“Just-” Severus stopped and grabbed Harry’s hand and place it on the can, activating the portkey.

Harry felt a pull at his navel and colors blurred. He shut his eyes tightly as a wave of dizziness overtook him and he fell to his knees, letting go of the can.

“What the- what was that for?” Harry sputtered angrily, holding his belongings to his stomach almost scared to open his eyes.

“I assume the Dursley house is not connected to the floo network, therefore this was the easiest way to travel with a minor,” Severus explained, watching the child on the ground with mild concern.

“What?” Harry opened his eyes and was surprised to find himself in the living room of a large and unfamiliar house. “Oh…”

“Oh?” Severus’s eyebrow managed to hike up again as he grabbed Harry’s hand once more and helped him up. “Don’t tell me that was your first time using a portkey.”

“Alright, I won’t.” Harry shrugged. He lifted his eyes to his professor and sighed, “Professor, I was raised by muggles. I’ve never heard of a portkey before just now. Everyone expects me to just know this stuff. I didn’t even know who Voldemort was or how my parents died until Hagrid told me… and then you made fun of me because I didn’t know the answers to all those questions you asked during our first class. They certainly don’t teach about bezoars and aconite in muggle chemistry… which they don’t even teach eleven year olds anyway!” Harry brought his rambling rant to an end, blushing at his own little speech.

“Are you quite finished?” Severus asked, sounding almost amused. Harry nodded. “And what of your muggle-born friend, Ms. Granger?”

“Hermione definitely doesn’t count. She not only reads her books, she memorizes them. Besides, her parents probably actually encourage her to learn more about magic. I wouldn’t even want to think of what would happen if Uncle Vernon saw me studying a text book about any sort of magic.”

“Yes… well now that you are here, I do expect you to study during your summer holiday. Maybe you’ll learn enough to finally brew a decent potion.” Severus attempted a joke, not knowing how he could interact with Harry to gain his favor. The joke failed to amuse the young child and Severus belatedly realized that he would have been taken too seriously because of all the insults he’d thrown at Harry in the past. Before retrieving Harry, he’d thought of buying him his affections with lots of presents but he didn’t think it would do any good to spoil the boy more than he’d been spoiled in the past. Now that he’d seen Harry’s little cupboard, he knew the boy wasn’t spoiled at all. The present idea was still no good though because it seemed that Harry owned so little that Severus needed to buy almost all new things for the boy anyway.

“So where is here?” Harry asked, now taking a chance to study his surroundings. He looked around the living room and he could see the second floor hall above him and in front of him was a large sitting area with opened up to a dining room.

“It’s proper name is Salazar’s Sanctuary, but it is my home away from Hogwarts. It is yours now also and you may refer to it as such.”

“Salazar… as in Slytherin?” Harry asked.

“Yes. My wife’s family is descended from the Slytherin founder.” Severus answered stiffly. He knew that Harry deserved to know about the Potter line, but he didn’t know if he could remain emotionally controlled if he were forced to talk about it.

“You have a wife?”

“I did.”

“You did- oh… sorry.” Harry winced. He was curious as to how Snape’s wife could have been a descendent of Slytherin because Harry thought that Tom Riddle was the only one, but he decided to let the topic go for now.

“As am I,” Severus whispered. The, shaking his head as if to clear it, he waved his hand about to motion around the house. “This is the living area. Straight ahead is the dining area. The hall to the left leads to the kitchen and the library. The hall to the right of the dining area leads to my potions lab and storage room. The door to our immediate right leads to a work out room. Behind and to our left is a bathroom.”

He walked in that direction and Harry followed. They turned inward away from the bathroom and Harry found himself following up a spiral stairway. On the second floor, they walked to the end of the walkway and stopped.

“This is my room. That is my office next to it. If that door is closed while I am inside, knock first. If it is open, you are free to enter. The other rooms on this side are spare rooms. The door directly across from my bedroom is your bedroom. You may go and unpack. To resize your trunk, just tap the lock twice. I will leave you now to get your room ready and acquaint yourself with your new surroundings.” There was an awkward moment of silence before Severus slipped into his office and left Harry alone in the hallway.

As Harry started to walk away toward his room, he heard a soft click and turned back in time to see the office door open just a crack and stay that way. He couldn’t help but smirk a little before going to his own room.

Harry was surprised when he saw his bedroom. It was more than twice the size of the bedroom he once occupied on the second floor of the Dursley house before he was moved back to the cupboard. His new room was also furnished beautifully with black oak wood making up his bed frame, desk, and dresser.

He’d expected Snape to give him a room more like the Dursleys had, but he was wrong and he was thankful for that. He set his trunk down at the foot of the bed and re-sized it. Then he dumped his knapsack out on the bed and shoved his old ratty pillow under the mattress. He began to put everything away and it didn’t take long as he only had three outfits other than his school robes.

After he was done, he found himself bored but didn’t want to bother Snape. The man had been nice enough to give him a room to stay in and Harry didn’t want to ruin whatever was keeping the man from sneering about Harry somehow being ‘just like James Potter’.

Looking around, Harry found he had his own bathroom through one of the doors and so he took a shower that he’d been wanting for a couple days and then he started on some of his summer homework.

----

Severus tried to work in his office but found himself glancing at the barely open door every few minutes. He couldn’t figure out how Harry was feeling about being plucked from one home and placed in another so casually. The boy had been surprised, that was obvious. Severus hoped that Harry was at least relieved to be out of that damned cupboard he’d been locked in.

The cupboard had surprised Severus. It was obvious that Harry lived in that small space and Severus had had to admit to himself that the boy wasn’t as spoiled as he’d once thought.

The knowledge of Harry’s home life also gave Severus some hope. He had been worried before that Harry would be accustomed to a life of luxury and would be bitter towards Severus for moving him into a normal home and making him live a normal life for a child. He knew now that he could provide a life for Harry was better than the one he’d known before.

So now Severus was aware of one assumption he’d been wrong about, but he was still unsure about the boy. No matter Severus’s changed feelings, he still couldn’t deny that Harry was a child who tended to disregard rules at school and ran head first into danger. So far Severus hadn’t seen much of the brattiness that he knew Harry was capable of, but he still expected it to pup up sooner or later.

The only difference this time would be that Severus would be able to handle Harry’s temper without losing his own due to blind hatred. This time there would be no jealousy of James and Lily for having a child when he had lost his own.

After a few hours had passed without Harry showing up at his door, Severus decided to seek him out for lunch. Harry’s door was open all the way so Severus entered the room without a knock. He saw Harry sitting at the desk against the wall taking notes from a book and biting his thumbnail.

Severus stood behind him and read over Harry’s shoulder for a moment, seeing what subject the boy seemed so involved in. He smirked when he saw that it was Potions. He put a hand on Harry’s shoulder and was going to give some advice, but Harry’s reaction stopped him.

Harry hadn’t noticed the professor enter the room and when he felt the pressure on his shoulder, he flinched and jumped in surprise. His food had been hooked lazily around one of the legs of his chair and he fell to the floor.

Nothing bruised but his pride, the little Gryffindor lashed out at the only other person in the room. When the older man reached down to him, Harry failed to see the helping gesture or the concerned eyes and he drew back and stood on his own.

“You shouldn’t sneak up on people like that,” he yelped, frowning a bit as he tried to ignore his blush of embarrassment.

“I didn’t ‘sneak’ up on you, Mr. Potter.” Severus drew his arm back and his eyebrows raised.

“Sure, I’ll be you just wanted to see if you could scare me just because-” Harry’s little tirade was interrupted.

“The door was open. I only entered to inform you that it is time for lunch. I saw your studies and was merely going to offer some advice.” Severus’s voice was quiet as he tried not to be too annoyed with Harry’s outburst. With the knowledge of their blood bond also came love for the boy… but liking and tolerating were much more difficult than loving.

“You were-! You…? Oh.” Harry stuttered to a stop, unsure of what to do or say then. He was saved from any further embarrassment when the other man’s voice spoke out.

“Perhaps we should just make our way o the kitchen for lunch.” Severus turned and walked from the room with Harry following.

“The kitchen?”

“Yes. I only use the dining area for breakfast and dinner. I rarely take a lunch, but with a child in my care… well, you should continue with the good eating habit of three meals a day as you are still growing.”

This time is was Harry who raised an unbelieving eyebrow, but it went unnoticed by the man in front of him.

The kitchen was different than Harry had expected. He was used to the small kitchen area at the Dursley house and he’d seen the old looking kitchens at Hogwarts, so he expected some sort of magical in-between. This kitchen was sleek and muggle-looking with lots of marble counter and storage space and the best equipment. There was an island of marble counter space in the middle of the room with two barstools near it.

“Brilliant,” Harry whispered as he took in the scene.

“I never would have thought you’d have an appreciation for a good kitchen, what with your lack of enthusiasm for potion brewing.” Severus smirked as he reached into a cupboard and grabbed a loaf of bread. “Sandwiches?”

“Sandwiches are good.” Harry nodded. He knew he should be hungry, but he wasn’t. His body had already gotten used to being so deprived of food that it had learned not to remind Harry or demand anything. But here was Snape, being so casually domestic that it unnerved Harry a bit, so he decided to make himself useful and he went to the refrigerator to find some sandwich makings.

“I do… well I used to do most of the cooking at the Dursley’s. Sometimes, if I’m left to myself and not on some time limit, it can be relaxing. Besides, cooking food is a lot different than brewing potions. If you spill a little extra salt into a sauce, it’s not going to explode.. much less pressure.” Harry took two pieces of bread and made his sandwich.

“Usually, with basic potions, a mistake can be fixed if you are quick an know what you are doing.”

They finished making their lunches and put the ingredients away and Severus grabbed a bottle of pumpkin juice for each of them as Harry took a seat on one of the stools.

“But how am I supposed to know what to do to fix each mistake?”

“By now you should know the properties of each ingredient you are using,” Severus said as he took a bite from his sandwich.

“How should I know that? They didn’t exactly teach it in primary school before I got to Hogwarts,” Harry replied.

“Then you should be reading up on the topic to find what you need.”

“Where? Our potions text only has page after page of different potion instructions and a summary of what each potion is… like a cook book. It doesn’t really get in depth with other things we should know for the class. So I can memorize how to make certain potions but I can’t tell you why they act the way they do. I tried to look in the library before but a lot of the potion books there are just like our textbooks. I don’t know where to look for this information and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Maybe there should be a supplement to our regular text or something…” Harry shrugged. Then he realized how casual and forward he’d just been and he froze.

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t-”

“No… no need to apologize. It is a good idea. I’m not sure how I feel about my teaching methods being critiqued by a thirteen year old… but it is a good idea.” Severus nodded to Harry’s half eaten sandwich that the boy was picking at, “Finish eating.”

“I think I am finished. The sandwich is very filling,” Harry softly said.

“It’s ham and cheese. It’s not that filling,” Severus countered. “I’ve seen you eat at Hogwarts and I know you eat more than this for lunch.”

“I eat more during the school year. It’s not a big deal, I just don’t eat much in the summer.” Harry frowned at the food, avoiding his guardian’s stare.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Mr. Potter, don’t give me cheek. Why don’t you eat the same amount of food year round? It’s not a difficult question.” Severus was wondering if he would be dealing with a child who had an eating disorder that was easily hidden during school.

“I’m not allowed, alright? Is that what you wanted to hear, Professor? Now you can laugh about it with all your Slytherins when school starts again. Poor, weak Harry Potter… even his own relatives don’t like him enough to feed him.”

Severus was surprised and chose to ignore Harry’s tone.

“No, that is not what I wanted to hear. Believe it or not, I do want you alive and well. Why didn’t anyone notice before?” To Severus, Harry looked thin but not dangerously skinny until he looked more carefully at certain things like Harry’s wrists or sometimes his shoulders when the overly large t-shirt slid to the side.

“School robes, baggy hand-me-down clothes… it’s easy to hide how much weight I’ve lost. I can usually gain enough back before Quidditch starts… so that nobody in the locker room says anything…” Harry waved his hand as if to say it wasn’t a big deal.

“Hmm…” Severus stood and looked the boy over as he thought quickly to himself. “Come with me.” He waved to Harry as he walked out of the kitchen.

Harry hopped down from his stool, swallowed what was left of his juice, and followed the potions master. They ended in the lab, which Harry was different from the labs at Hogwarts. It was more personal to the older man and it had many more tools and gadgets than what was available for the students.

“Take off your clothes.”

“What? No!” Harry stiffened in surprise at the command.

“Take your- Merlin’s sake, I just need to examine you. I’ve just been informed (by you) that your former guardians have basically starved you. You cannot expect me to believe that’s all they did.” Severus’s face showed no expressions except for two slightly raised eyebrows.

“Well, it is and I do.” Harry insisted, crossing his arms over his chest to make sure his clothes stayed on.

“Well, even if that is all that happened, I still need to know what I’m dealing with so that I can make a nutritive potion to suit your needs. I’ll need your exact height and weight, and I’ll need to see your body to estimate how much of the weight is muscle, fat, bones, etc…” Severus tried to explain. He could see Harry’s resolve start to waver as he was given reasonable explanations. “I had to weigh and examine Lupin the same way… if that makes you feel any better. Some medicinal potions need to be tailored to each person that they are made for while many basic potions… a burn or bruise salve, Skelegro, Pepper-Up… those I can usually make a generic base for Madame Pomphrey and she can make specific additions if needed for each patient.”

“The Wolfsbane Potion is specific like that?”

“Yes.”

With a slight sigh, Harry finally nodded his consent. He pulled his shirt off and held it to his chest, still shy and unsure about his exposure to the man he’d known for three years but really only met today.

Severus could see the boy’s collar bone jutting out and a dark patch of skin near the left shoulder. He reached out and gently pried the shirt from Harry’s grasp and set it on the table next to him.

“Harry…” The sigh of the name made Harry look up from where he’d been staring at the floor, surprised. He was even more surprised when he looked at the man’s face. Where he’d expected to see a sneer of disgust or a smirk because Harry had gotten when he deserved, he instead saw that the man just looked sad.

Severus had to take a deep breath before knelt closer to examine Harry. His ribs were visible and there were some bruises on the sides of Harry’s torso and his back.

“What are the bruises from?” Severus asked, turning from Harry and walking to the shelves against the wall to get a jar of bruise salve. He was still waiting for an answer from Harry when he finally found the jar he wanted and he walked back.

He scooped a large dollop from the jar and reached out to touch Harry’s back. Harry’s muscles went taut at the unknown touch and Severus gently massaged the salve in, calming Harry enough to relax.

“Sometimes I don’t always get my chores done and I get a smack, nothing major. Or if I’m in the way, I just get pushed aside… or sometimes I get shoved into my cupboard a little rougher if Uncle Vernon is upset with me. They don’t beat me or anything though… so it’s not what you’re thinking.”

“What I’m thinking is that you don’t even know what child abuse is.” Severus was unable to keep the slight growl out of his voice.

“Sorry, sir.” Harry took a step away from Severus, making him pause. He knew that being exposed would make Harry feel more vulnerable and he felt horrible for exacerbating it.

“No, don’t apologize when you haven’t done anything wrong.” Severus capped the jar and set it on the table next to Harry’s shirt. He took a breath and tried to make his voice as gentle as possible. “Take off your pants and stand on the scale. I need your exact weight and as baggy as those pants are, I’m afraid they’ll make too much of a difference.”

Reluctantly, as anyone in his situation would be, Harry undid his belt, which was a bit loose even at the tightest notch, and let his baggy jeans fall to the floor. His embarrassment showed in the red flush that went from his face down to his chest. He’d never had a real check up from a doctor and he’d been unconscious anytime that Madame Pomphrey had needed to put him in hospital pajamas. He usually took his showers at night while the other boys at school showered in the morning and during Quidditch everybody worried about themselves. So Harry’d never had any attention paid to him in such a state of undress.

Severus studied Harry with a clinical eye, trying to keep his emotions at bay until he could deal with them alone. Harry’s hip bones were too visible for anyone his age and his legs were little sticks. He cleared his throat when he felt a sharp sorrow reaching from his chest to his throat.

“Just step onto the scale and then you can put your clothes back on.” His voice was thick and he was almost surprised that Harry could even hear him enough to do as he was told.

“Hey, it’s a muggle scale.”

“Yes. They are more reliable than a weight diagnostic spell.” Severus demonstrated by waving his wand over Harry’s head and murmuring a quick spell. “According to my wand, you are 5 feet tall and-” Severus hissed in through his teeth and winced, “- you weigh about 78 lbs.”

Harry cringed, not really at the numbers but at the voice that had croaked them out. He hated his short stature, but he wasn’t so concerned about the weight as he’d been skinnier before. The man standing beside him didn’t know that though and was quite concerned enough for the both of them.

He watched as the other man then brought down the metal bar on the scale so that it lightly touched Harry’s head. The professor wrote something down on a parchment on the table. Then he moved the small weights that sat along the numbers at the top of the scale until everything balanced out and he wrote some more on the parchment.

“According to the scale you are 5 feet and 1 ½ inch tall and your weight still remains at 78 lbs. You are extremely underweight and if I had used the information from the diagnostic spell, your potion would have been too weak by a small bit because of the incorrect height. It would not have done any damage, but it would have taken the potion longer to work,” Severus explained as he motioned for Harry to step down and put his clothes back on. He walked back to the table and stared at the parchment for a moment, giving Harry a small bit of privacy to dress himself.

“Your potion shouldn’t take too long to make. It will be done by tonight. It is an exact potion, though, and I’ll need to concentrate. You may entertain yourself until dinner, but do not leave the house. I still need to ward the yards.”

Harry nodded, pushing his arms through the large holes in his shirt, and knew that he was dismissed.

“May I read in the library?” He wasn’t usually one to read for recreation, that was Hermione’s role in the group, but he didn’t think he had the energy to do much else. The summer had not given him much and he used up anything he got and more when he was doing chores. The sandwich half did make him feel a bit better, but he knew it usually took a week or two before he felt normal after summer.

“Of course you may. This is your home now and there is no need to ask permission. All you need to remember is to knock and wait for an answer before you enter a room with a closed door. That is all the instruction you need until we have the discussion of house rules.” Severus frowned slightly as he gave his answer.

Harry figured the frown meant that he was being annoying and that made him feel a little guilty. The man was taking time out of his day to make a potion to make Harry feel better and he could at least try not to bother him by asking stupid questions.

“Er… right. Sorry, sir. Oh, and thanks.” Harry quickly left the room.

Severus watched the boy scurry out. With this special nutritive potion business going on, he was going to have to wait a while before he would be able to attempt some sort of bonding with Harry. This situation was going to be in the way and damn the Dursleys and damn James Potter for delaying him from gaining Harry’s favor and trust even longer.

Damn them all for hurting this child. Damn them because Harry had gotten so used to it that he didn’t even know he was hurting. He knew that if James had not taken Harry and if Severus had raised him, he would be healthy and maybe happier. And he knew that now he could only try to make things better for Harry from now on.

Harry had been surprised when he saw the library. He was expecting a normal sized room with a bunch of books… like what some average people would call a ‘library’, but what he found looked more like the public library in Surrey. If Snape were serious about this being Harry’s home too, then Harry was sure that Hermione would want to come and visit just to see the library.

He looked around until he could figure out how everything was organized and he found a large section of muggle books. There were a lot of the novels that he’d always wanted to read before, but the Dursleys had never allowed him to have a library card of his own. He picked out a copy of The Once & Future King and sat down on the floor near the fireplace in the large room.

It didn’t seem like he’d been there very long, but soon he felt a presence and he looked up from the book to see Professor Snape sitting in one of the armchairs with a book of his own. Snape looked up a second after Harry.

“How long- when did you-?” Harry stuttered. Snape smirked and closed his book with care.

“We’ll need to work on those communication skills of yours, Harry. And I’ve been sitting here for the past twenty minutes.”

“Oh.” Harry said, surprised.

“Good book, then?” Severus asked as he stood and walked closer to Harry to see what he’d been reading. Harry handed it to him.

“Mmm… yes, I remember seeing this book lying in random parts of the house many many times. Your-” Severus bit down on the inside of his cheek and stopped himself. He took a breath then and continued, “My late wife, Marguerite, loved this book. It was one of her favorites.” He then handed it back to Harry. “You may keep this in your room if you would like. It’s yours now.”

Harry gently held the book again and stood with a startled expression on his face, his jaw slack with shock.

“Sir, you can’t give me this. It was your wife’s and-”

“No, I’m sure she would have rather that you have it. You’ll enjoy the book more than I.” Severus held himself stiffly, wanting almost to bare his soul to Harry and let him know that it was his own mother’s book and that’s why he should have it now. But he knew he needed to wait.

“Thank you, sir.”

“Go and bring it to your room. Then get washed up and come to dinner. It should be ready.”

Harry nodded and hurried out to put it away. In his room, he set it on his nightstand next to the photo album that Hagrid had given him a few years back. Then he quickly washed his hands in his bathroom and ran downstairs, trying not to be too loud on the floor.

When he got to the dining area, he was surprised to see his professor finishing setting the small table and then serving each plate.

“I could have helped,” Harry said.

“I could have asked if I had needed, but I didn’t.” Severus answered. He nodded for Harry to sit down and then he took his own seat. Then, realizing that his response might have sounded rude, Severus began again, “The potion that I have made will make you… drowsy and you’ll be taking it twice a day for the next few days. You won’t be up to helping with anything around the house.” He bent the truth a little as he explained. It wouldn’t make Harry drowsy so much as it would… make him higher than a muggle kite.

“Oh” Harry nodded. He waited until Snape started eating before he dug in. His portions were small since he couldn’t eat much yet, but it looked delicious. Roasted chicken and vegetables, cottage cheese, and a bread roll made up the wonderful dinner. It tasted as good as it looked.

“I didn’t know you cooked.”

“It is a rather enjoyable break from potions sometimes. The kitchen used to be a traditional wizarding one. It wasn’t changed until I moved in.”

Harry smiled around his fork at that last bit of information. He was learning so many interesting things about this man whom he’d never thought had a life outside of terrorizing students. He decided he liked this side of his professor and he hoped he wouldn’t do anything to remind Snape of how much he really disliked Harry.

Dinner ended when Severus had finished and Harry, eating at a much slower pace, declared he couldn’t finish his plate. Severus only demanded that Harry finish his glass of milk before he cleared the table with a wave of his wand. He then stood and approached the still sitting Harry. Severus pulled out a phial that contained a dark blue potion and he set it on the table in front of Harry.

“This is what you will be taking when you wake up each morning and again after dinner each night. It’s a combination suited to your specific condition. It contains a nutrient potion… that isn’t a miracle fix. It will only provide the normal amounts of what you should be getting each day to make up for your small meal portions at this moment. It can’t give you everything you’ve missed, nutrition-wise, in the past. The potion also contains an extender… it will help your stomach grow to accommodate larger meals sooner. There is a stomach soother in the potion to alleviate any discomfort the extender might create. The last part of the combination is a mild calming draft. This is only to make sure that you don’t expend too much energy, burning too many calories and rendering these efforts useless. The combination of all these things will have an effect on you, as I’ve stated earlier. Do you understand?”

Harry was looking back and forth between Severus and the potion phial.

“Y-yes.”

“Good. Then I suggest you take your first dose now… and then go straight to bed.”

Harry did as told and tipped the phial up, swallowing with a surprised widening of his eyes. The potion was fruity tasting and felt slightly fizzy almost like a fruit soda. Then he nodded his goodnight and left the dining area to head to his room.

Severus watched him go and kept an eye on the small figure as he went upstairs and when Harry reached his bedroom door, Severus gave a small sigh. He’d expected some sign of defiance from Harry at being sent to bed so early. He would have explained his reasons for it if Harry had only asked, but he never did.

He knew that with Harry’s body being so empty and in it’s weakened state, the potion would hit him hard on the first night and he’d most likely fall asleep within the first twenty minutes.

With Harry gone to bed, Severus took the time to sit and think. As full as the day had been, he had to remind himself it was only the first day. And a full one it had been. First, he had gone to retrieve his son and he discovered that the boy lived in a cupboard. Then he’d found out that Harry had also been denied food by those muggles and when Severus saw the damage done, he wanted to curse himself for not seeing it before and the Dursleys for causing it.

Severus was also discovering that Harry acted much different here than he did at school. He didn’t know if it was because he was acting kinder to Harry, because his friends weren’t around to encourage him into mischievous behavior, or if it was because Harry was actually intimidated by Severus now even though he hadn’t seemed so before.

---

The next day, Severus made sure he was always near Harry so that he could keep an eye or ear out if he had any strange reactions to the potion. Harry didn’t seem to notice the hovering, but it was understandable that he wasn’t as observant as usual in his drugged up state. There were no complications but it was somewhat amusing to watch Harry like this.

It was at lunch that Harry spoke his first words of the day when he declared that cranberry juice tasted like autumn and it should be the official drink of Halloween at Hogwarts.

“Really? I doubt half the students even know what cranberry juice is,” Severus answered lightly.

“Probably true… I never had any before today either. It’s really good. I wonder why we only have pumpkin juice at school. I love it and all, but it gets boring when we have it day after day after day…” Harry’s voice trailed off and he finished the portion of food that Severus had set out for him.

A few hours later, Harry’s lack of inhibitions lead him to fall asleep leaning against Severus on the couch. Before he fell asleep, he lifted his head from the man’s shoulder.

“I need a uh… head marshmallow.” Harry’s brows furrowed as he tried to find the right words and settled on those.

“A what?

“You know… soft… for my head. Your shoulder is sharp. Not very comfy.” Harry explained. He smiled airily as he shook his head about Severus’s sharp shoulder.

“My- you…. A pillow?” Severus finally understood. Harry nodded. “Accio pillow.”

A small pillow, from who knew where, flew into his hand and he gave it to Harry.

“Mmm… thanks.” Harry set it on Severus’s shoulder and put his head back where it had laid before. Within minutes he was asleep. Severus just hoped that Harry wouldn’t remember that moment and be mortified at his own behavior.

The next day was much the same way except that Harry attempted to read more of The Once and Future King at one point. He was able to read a paragraph or two before becoming distracted and singing (very off-key) through the whole soundtrack to the musical Camelot. Severus cringed and almost cast a Silencio in Harry’s direction, but was able resist the temptation.

At one point during the day, Harry was lying in the middle of the library floor, staring at the ceiling with a dazed grin on his face.

“What are you doing?” Severus asked as he studied the boy.

“Reading a book.”

“You’re staring at the ceiling. You don’t even have a book in your hand.”

“No, I’m reading a book in my head.” Harry paused. “Hmm… maybe not a book. More like a story about a story. Dudley called if ‘fan fiction’ or something. Ever since he got the world interweb or whatever… alt.ql.creative… Dudley liked Quantum Leap. In my head, I’m reading about Star Wars though… they make books about it, ya know. But right now Han just made the kessel run in under twelve parsecs. He’s so cool, Snape. Don’t you think so?” He turned toward Severus, his eyes bright with such amazement and wonder.

“I don’t know who Han is.” Severus had to admit, hating that the light in Harry’s eyes briefly dimmed. They brightened again as Harry then sat up, realizing he could tell Severus the whole story of Star Wars.

“Oh! Well… a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…” Harry began.

Of course, Harry ended up getting distracted and never did get to tell Severus the whole story. He made it up until Han Solo was frozen in carbonite and then forgot what he had been talking about.

On the third day, Harry’s body had finally gained enough strength from the potion for him to stay afloat mentally while still taking it. His embarrassed silence and the faint redness on his neck and face when he remembered something he’d done the other two days showed that Harry had become more aware of his surroundings.

After dinner that night, he finally spoke up again from his comfortable spot on the floor near the large fireplace in the living room.

“Can I stop taking the potion?” He asked. Severus looked at him with a small amount of surprise and a little relief.

“I was wondering how long with would take before you built up enough energy to fight your way through that fog.”

“Er… sorry. I don’t know why I said a lot of things that I… and I’m sorry I fell asleep on you and- God, I’m just…” Harry was so flustered, he couldn’t form a full sentence.

“You weren’t yourself. Nevertheless… you weren’t too bothersome save for your rather… charming music medley. I do hope to hear what happens to poor Han Solo someday though.” Severus smirked before continuing in a more serious voice. “Since you are now in a well enough frame of mind to actually be concerned about your own behavior, I do believe that you will be able to start taking a slightly modified version of the potion. The new one focuses just on the nutrients you need and has no side effects like the current potion. After two days of that potion, I will examine you again and if that goes well, you may stop taking the potion full stop.”

Harry smiled and sighed, relieved that he would be potions free soon. Then a thought came to him and he was surprised that the idea hadn’t occurred to him at any time lately.

“Can I go out and fly tomorrow?”

“No.”

“What? Why?”

“For one, you aren’t strong enough yet and you might-”

“I’m not a weakling!” Harry interrupted as he slammed his hand down on the hearth, wincing at the hard brick that his skin connected with.

“I didn’t say you were.” Severus seemed the epitome of calm.

“That’s what you meant, though. You just don’t want me to practice because you don’t want your Slytherins to lose to us yet again!”

“If you don’t calm down and apologize for your outburst, you will be sent to your room for the rest of the night.”

“Why should I apologize to you? I just-”

“Silence! The reasons you cannot go flying are because you are still building your strength and because I have not yet been able to strengthen the wards outside because I’ve been watching over you.” Severus took a deep breath and tried to calm himself before he could yell out anything that was uncalled for. However much he had prepared himself for parenthood so many years ago, he’d spent too much time since then despising any children he’d come in contact with and that habit was hard to break.

Harry snapped his mouth shut and took a step back fro the man. He was pretty sure that he’d just screwed up whatever sort of non-hate relationship that had been forming.

“I…”

“Go. Go to your room. Now.” Severus pointed in the direction of the stairs and stayed in that position until Harry had quietly started to ascend them. He didn’t look up when Harry leaned over the railing on the second floor.

“I’m sorry,” the small voice floated down to Severus before the sound of Harry’s bedroom door clicking shut.

The next few days, Harry spent the majority of his time in his bedroom. He was angry with himself. A man who didn’t really like Harry had taken him into his home and put so much effort into getting him healthy and instead of thanking him, Harry had thrown a small tantrum all because he wasn’t able to fly his broom. He should have been grateful just to have a room and food.

The way he saw it, he ruined everything. He’d insulted his professor and made him remember why he hated Harry in the first place. He almost feared interacting with the man outside of mealtimes because he didn’t want to bother Snape to the point where he would turn into the Dursleys. He couldn’t avoid him forever though because Harry was reminded one night that he needed to be examined again to see if he could quit the potions full stop.

“You’ve gained an acceptable amount of weight, though I can still see your ribs. You’ve been eating closer to normal portions at mealtimes. You may stop taking the potion.” Severus nodded to Harry.

Harry grinned slightly and slid his giant shirt back on.

“You may also go outside from now on… as long as you stay on this property and don’t fly higher than the roof of the house. But tomorrow I think we need a trip to Diagon Ally. You are in dire need of a new wardrobe.”

“Oh… no, but I don’t know if I can afford… I mean, I think my parents left enough money for school and stuff, but not for things like that. I really don’t mind Dudley’s hand-me-downs,” Harry protested.

“James and Lily left more than just enough for school, believe me. There is a whole other vault that you will inherit when you reach adulthood. But that is beside the point. I am your guardian and I will be providing for you from now on… that means for your education and essentials such as clothing.”

“But… but I thought you wouldn’t… I thought you hated me again.”

Severus froze in the middle of putting a parchment pad back in a drawer. He turned to Harry and looked at him in a way that made Harry feel as if he was under a microscope. Was the man actually almost squinting in concentration?

“Why?” The man’s face finally relaxed a bit and almost looked like he was trying to pass off as uncaring and casual.

“Well, I yelled at you and I thought that now you realized you still hate me as much outside of school as you do in school.”

Severus hesitated before speaking, choosing his words carefully.

“Harry… I don’t hate you. I admit that I did once… I know I can’t deny that with my behavior in the past. I don’t hate you now, though. I won’t start again when school starts either.”

“But you were ignoring me and I thought you were staying away just so you wouldn’t be tempted to-”

“I haven’t seen you much these past days because you didn’t need to be monitored as closely anymore and I’ve been working on the wards outside. You’ve also been sulking in your bedroom, don’t forget. Harry, you apologized for losing your temper and that was that. I didn’t mean for you to think I hated you.” Severus furrowed his eyebrows. “I certainly didn’t think you would care at all about my attentions.”

Severus put the last of his things away and put his hand on Harry’s shoulder to steer him out of the room.

“I don’t… or I didn’t. I didn’t think I would,” Harry admitted as they walked out and into the living room. Harry quickly sat down on the left corner of the couch, which was quickly becoming his usual spot.

“It is okay to care.” Severus assured him. Severus was surprised that Harry had formed an emotional connection to him so quickly after spending only a little over a week in the house with him and almost half of it Harry was too drugged for it to even count. Then he considered the events that had taken place at the end of this last school year. Harry had found Sirius, an adult to look up to, and he consented to moving in with him after having just met the man. Harry was clearly deprived of any parental figures and latched on quickly to whomever he could.

“Well, what changed your mind?” Harry’s voice broke Severus out of his contemplation.

“Pardon?”

“Why did you decide not to hate me anymore?”

There was a question that Severus could not fabricate an answer to. Anything other than the truth would never be believed as basis enough for such a drastic change.

“Does it matter?” He tried, not meeting Harry’s eyes.

“I guess not.”

Severus wouldn’t take the chance of the true answer ruining the shaky relationship they seemed to be forming. He was relieved that Harry had let it go so easily. Days of politeness and a semi-sort of trust were not enough to build a father/son relationship on. He wanted to know that such a blow would not push Harry away before he would let loose with the information.

“Now that we’ve gotten that cleared up, I think we should discuss rules, chores, and discipline.” It didn’t escape Severus’s notice when Harry’s eyes widened at the word ‘discipline’. Harry’d already denied being beaten and Severus figured there were three possibilities here. Harry could have lied. Harry could actually believe that the way he was treated was normal. The Dursleys could have thought up a punishment that frightened Harry more than being beaten.

“Alright.” Harry’s voice was quiet and his posture more stiff and upright than before.

“Rules… there will be no swearing or cursing. You will keep your room tidy and clean up any messes you make around the house. You may not leave the property without an escort as your fame does, unfortunately, make you a target in the wizarding world. You must be in the house when it is dark. You will have a bedtime of ten at night. I expect you to use your common sense for anything else not mentioned, but if you find yourself in a situation that you are unsure about, do feel free to ask. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Chores. You did mention that you had them at the Dursley house. What did you usually do there?”

“Er… a little bit of everything. I was given a list of what needed to be done before the end of the day. I didn’t have as many chores this summer as I usually do.” Harry shrugged brightly, choosing not to mention that the reason he had less chores because he was kept in his cupboard most of the time.

“What was usually written on the list? I’d like to have an idea of what you know how to do… some common chores for children in the wizarding world are quite different from those in the muggle world. For example, you probably wouldn’t know the first thing about de-gnoming a garden.”

“Actually, I got to help with that at The Burrow. I can do that if you want me to and I can do other chores too. If I don’t know what to do, you can show me.”

“Yes, but I’m trying to make this transition a little easier on you by having you do chores that you are at least somewhat familiar with.” Severus couldn’t tell if Harry was trying to be helpful by not showing a chore preference or if he was being deliberately vague.

“Seriously, Professor. Anything is fine. Tell me what to do and I’ll do it… and I won’t complain, I promise.” Harry knew that nobody would ever want to hear about his chores at the Dursleys. He had been called a liar in grade school by a teacher and another kid had told him to just stop whining. Harry thought that maybe his professor would end up doing both since he’d always accused Harry of being spoiled and stuck up in the past… but this man was different than before and he’d believed Harry about the food. He’d even helped him, but was it worth the risk?

“Alright, let’s try a different approach. What is your least favorite chore?” Severus asked.

“Dudley’s bedroom… or the shed… no, Dudley’s room. It’s disgusting and smelly. His underwear are all streaked and his shirts are soaked with sweat and smell terrible.”

“You cleaned your cousin’s room? Why didn’t he clean it himself?”

“Dudley doesn’t clean anything. I do so I can earn my keep… ya know, because I’m not really part of the family but they took me in and stuff.” Harry explained as if it made perfect sense even though his voice contained a hint of bitterness.

“You should not have had to earn your keep. You are a child. Chores are mostly meant to teach the importance of hard work for when you got out into the real world,” Severus insisted. “Now the shed. I don’t have one, but I would like to know why you dislike it so much so that I can avoid giving you a chore that is reminiscent of it.”

“Well, most of it was okay. I didn’t mind most of the cleaning up in the shed. I just hated when I had to clean up the sprayers. He- Uncle Vernon kept these big sprayers in the shed that I had to use on the gardens and stuff. They burned my hands and made me feel sick when I had to mess with that stuff.”

Severus was vaguely aware of what Harry was talking about and knew that the chemicals used in many pesticides were only to used with protective gear and never by a child.

“Harry...” Severus’s voice cracked. The more he ran scenarios through his mind, the more he realized that Harry could have died any number of times if something had gone wrong of he’d been exposed one too many times to the harsh chemicals. He sat down next to Harry and put his hands on Harry’s arms as a comforting gesture. He had an urge to hug the boy, but Harry immediately jerked away and stood up.

“What are you playing at anyway? I know you said you don’t hate me, but that doesn’t automatically mean we’re friends and you can get all… all touchy feely and affectionate.” Harry slowly took a few steps away from the couch. “Besides,” he added. “It’s no big deal. So I had a lot of crappy chores. It’s no reason to throw a pity party. There are plenty of kids who have it worse, so I have no reason to complain.”

“I apologize for invading your personal space,” Severus acknowledged with a raised eyebrow. He was beginning to see a pattern. It seemed that whenever a situation made Harry feel vulnerable, he lashed out with anger to make himself feel stronger. It was a trait that certain cheeky headmasters would say must have been passed genetically from Severus.

“As for this being ‘no big deal’, I must disagree with you. Your uncle forced you to expose yourself to harmful chemicals on a regular basis. You could have died… if you had swallowed any by accident or if one of the containers exploded. Merlin knows what other child abuse you’re hiding because you think nothing of it. I will find out everything eventually, I promise you that.”

Harry let out a resigned sigh and relaxed his stance.

“Fine.. How about this? I can clean the kitchen each day, cook when you want me to, and vacuum and dust all the rooms in the house.” Harry put an offer on the table, starting with a minimal amount of chores, ready for Snape to bargain for more chores.

“This instead. You can cook when you want to and on the nights when you do cook, I will clean the kitchen. I don’t own a vacuum as the floors are spelled to stay clean. You can dust the living room and dining room. Libraries should always have a bit of dust and I don’t want you to get hurt by accident in my labs.”

It was the opposite type of bargain than Harry had been expecting so he nodded slowly with surprise.

“And now that leaves discipline…” Severus watched Harry carefully and didn’t miss the stiffness in the body as Harry slowly sat back down, his posture perfect and his gaze down on his knees.

“For small infractions you will get a warning of what will happen if the action is repeated. Maybe an extra chore, taking away privileges such as flying time. For major infractions, including anything that could get you hurt, killed, or expelled from school. There will be no such warning. You will receive punishment.”

“Like what?”

“Planning on a deadly escapade already?”

“No! But… well, it seems to happen each year no matter what I want, though.”

“Well, I assure you that any punishments will be as fair as possible. There will be no hitting, taking away meals, or confinement in small spaces. I think the best thing would be to wait until something happens and we will discuss a proper punishment for you. I don’t think it would be prudent to decide anything ahead of time because the punishment should fit the crime,” Severus explained. He was slightly amused now that Harry had forgotten his fearful posture and was now openly gawking.

“Is this agreeable, Harry?” He called the boy out of his surprise.

“Yeah, uh.. Yes. Yes, sir… very agreeable.”

“Good. Chores will begin tomorrow. As for now, I think it would be best if you did some school work and then went to sleep.”

Harry nodded again in agreement and stood to leave. He paused as he passed by the fireplace and he turned back.

“Yes?” Severus asked. Harry took a breath to build his confidence, wondering how far this agreeable relationship could extend.

“I was wondering… well, I’m kind of stuck on my potions work and if you have free time tomorrow… well, could you help me? I’m not asking for the answers or anything, but could you point me in the right direction or tell me where to look?”

“I could help you. Bring your work to my lab tomorrow after breakfast. I think I have an idea of where your problem is… based on where you’ve been stuck in the past in my class. We’ll work through it together.”

“Thank you!” With a bright smile, Harry left for his room once again.

Severus’s heart ached wonderfully when he realized it was the first real smile on Harry’s face that he had contributed to.

“So… without the unicorn tears, the potion would induce nightmares?”

It was the next day and Harry and Severus were both in the lab, leaning over a small cauldron. Harry had finished his potions homework with help and found that when he wasn’t worrying about being berated by his professor or filibuster fireworks being tossed in his cauldron, potions could actually be interesting. With this new enthusiasm, Harry had so many more questions just out of curiosity and it lead to them brewing a Dreamless Sleep potion together

“Exactly, but if you add too many, it could put someone into a coma.” Severus nodded his approval. Harry chewed his lip in a moment of thought before he spoke up again.

“Oh! Because they can relax your body too much, right? Hmm… that’s not a very comforting thing to know. One unsteady hand or startle and you could be in deep trouble.”

“That is why the teaching or selling of potions requires a mastery,” Severus commented with some amusement.

“I guess I never thought about it… you are a Potions Master, but I’ve never heard any of the other professors referred to as masters. McGonagall not a transfigurations master, Flitwick’s not a charms master, and Hagrid’s not a… er… beast master.” Harry’s last example died with a snort from Severus as he stifled a chuckle.

Harry shook his head to end that line of conversation and took the small cauldron off the flame and bottled the potion for inspection. Severus held it up to the light and swirled it around, watching for any visual imperfections.

“Well done, Harry. This looks to be a good potion. If it tests well, I shall put it in storage for future use.”

“I-well… it is? A good potion, I mean.”

“Yes, it looks to be. I must admit I’m surprised as well as you are, but I’m assuming a location and attitude change may have had something to do with your abilities. After all, I doubt Granger brewed a Polyjuice all on her own in second year. She must have had her friends,” Severus commented lightly, his face carefully devoid of any telling expression.

“Oh… you know about that?”

“Credit me with some brains, child. I was the one whom Madame Pomphrey called to help with her… feline problem.” Severus now smiled. “I did have to take a sample of the potion from Granger’s cup. That potion was also well done.”

“Thanks,” Harry mumbled, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck in embarrassment. It was then that his stomach gave a low gurgle, making Harry’s face flame up even more.

“Hmm… apparently it’s time for lunch.” Severus observed.

“Apparently,” Harry echoed.

----

Lunch was a simple affair, chicken caesar salad made with leftover chicken from the night before. Harry never would have thought of Snape as the type of person to save food and use leftovers, but one thing he’d learned since he arrived was that the man was very muggle-ish when it came to food. It was comforting for Harry, as he had originally assumed that everything would be so formal and stiff like he’d always thought his professor to be.

Harry cleaned the kitchen afterwards and then finished his chores after Severus announced that the trip to Diagon Alley would follow the finished chores.

“But I haven’t even gotten my letter yet. I don’t know what books I’ll need,” Harry half-heartedly protested, shrugging his large shirt back into place as it slipped off of his shoulder.

“Then it’s fortunate that you are with a member of the teaching staff. I know all that you will need, even for your Defense class.” Severus pursed his mouth slightly when he took in Harry’s clothes. “Madame Malkin’s first, I would say. You do know how to use a floo, correct?”

“Yes. Can’t say I’m too fond of it though. Don’t wizards have any normal sort of transportation?”

“That would depend on your definition of normal. If you had been reared here in the wizarding world, I assure you that you would find nothing odd with the floo or a portkey. Come now… we’ll floo together.” Severus grabbed Harry’s arm and pulled him into the fireplace. “Wouldn’t want you to end up in Knockturn Alley.”

Harry jerked his head to the man in surprise and was about to utter a protest but found himself engulfed in roaring green flame before he could open his mouth. He fell out of the fireplace on the other side in a less than graceful heap. A hand on his shoulder made him tense, but he relaxed himself and grabbed the professor’s helping hand.

“Come now. I’d tell you to clean yourself off, but since you will be rid of those rags soon…” Severus let the sentence hang as Harry attempted to shake off the excess soot and floo powder anyway.

As they walked through The Leaky Cauldron, they ignored the stares of the many patrons, but Severus noticed that Harry was self-consciously trying to smooth his fringe over his scar to hide it. He silently berated himself fore ever having called the child conceited and attention seeking.

“They already know who you are. There’s no sense in trying to hide.” Severus softly attempted to comfort Harry and received a quick glare for his troubles. They were silent until they reached the robe shop and then Severus commanded the attention of the employees who pasted fake smiles on their faces when they saw him.

“This young man needs a whole new wardrobe. He’s lived in the muggle world so he’ll probably be more comfortable with some muggle clothing.” Severus glanced at Harry and saw a relieved smile at that specific. “Four pairs of trousers, five short sleeved shirts, two long sleeved shirts. He will also need proper wizarding attire. Two lightweight summer robes, three all-weather robes, two winter robes, and one cloak. Hmm…” Severus stared at Harry a moment more before adding, “Also he’ll need a pair of dress shoes, one pair of casual shoes, one pair of trainers, several pairs of white and black songs, and undergarments.”

Then Harry was whisked away and measured for his new clothes He was asked several questions about colors and cuts (which he had no clue about) and then there were many different people handing him outfit after outfit to try on. It was very frustrating for the boy who’d never really gone clothes shopping before.

Finally Harry had picked out all his muggle style clothes, including one to wear out of the store, and he was brought back out to the front of the store where Snape was sitting in a chair, waiting.

“While you were trying on your outfits, I asked them to pick out the robes to match what you decided to keep. They are self-fitting and adjustable so you don’t need to try them on,” he explained to Harry.

Snape motioned for Harry to follow him as he made to leave the store, but Harry stopped.

“But what about the stuff? Don’t I… we need to pay for-?”

“I already filled out a bank draft while you were busy and your clothes will be delivered.”

“I didn’t know you could do that,” Harry said.

“Do you just carry around a bag of galleons when you shop? Not very safe to show how much money you have” Snape chided. Harry just shrugged. It wasn’t like anyone had ever explained this stuff to him before.

“Do muggles carry bags of money with them regularly? Do they not have a way to be discreet about their finances?”

Harry narrowed his eyes at the man as he walked with him. He looked for any sign of sarcasm but decided that he was actually just curious.

“Coins aren’t worth as much for muggles. The biggest amounts are in paper money… it’s easier to carry. And if they don’t want to carry cash, they can use credit cards or checking accounts.”

“Credit cards? Checking accounts?”

“Uh… credit cards… they are these plastic cards that you can use to pay for things. It’s basically like borrowing money. With checks, you already have the money in the bank and you write out how much to take out,” Harry tried to explain.

“Like a bank draft then. How do they exchange information… do they actually have to wait for the mail before completing a purchase?”

“No… it goes through computers. I don’t know how they work though, so don’t ask.”

“Fascinating.”

The rest of the shopping trip wasn’t very exciting. They picked up Harry’s school supplies and a few potions ingredients then they ate dinner at The Three Broomsticks before heading home at a much later hour than planned.

Harry was exhausted when he stepped out of the floo and into the living room and his head had begun to pound toward the end of the trip.

“I think I’ll head up to bed a little early. Thank you for… you know, for everything.”

“You are welcome. The trip was enjoyable for me. Goodnight.”

Harry then ducked his head to hide a small smile and he turned to go upstairs to bed. When he got to his room, he made plans for the next day as he got ready to sleep. He was finally going to get in some flying practice and then check out that workout room downstairs. All he needed to do was get some sleep first and rid himself of his horrible headache.

Harry awoke feeling like his throat was on fire and his head was going to explode. He opened his eyes and then snapped them shut against the blinding light that poured in through his window. He debated to himself whether it was worth the effort to go to the bathroom for a drink of water. In the end, he knew he had to get up eventually anyway.

Shielding his eyes, he opened them and let them slowly adjust before he threw his blanket back. He shivered against the sudden chilled and pushed himself upright. He groaned and waited a moment before standing and he wondered how he could be hot and cold at the same time. He shuffled into the bathroom and used the spare glass that always sat near the sink. His throat hurt when he wallowed but the cool water did soothe the fiery feeling a bit.

Harry took the glass of water back to his bedroom and took an occasional sip as he slowly got dressed for the day. A bright spot was that he had all his new clothes to choose from. If the headache hadn’t been bringing him down, he might have been positively giddy.

When he got downstairs, breakfast was already set on the table and Snape was sitting with the Daily Prophet in one hand as he waited for him. Snape folded the paper and set it aside when Harry sat down.

“Good morning,” Snape greeted. Harry managed a tight smile in return. He examined the food on the table, gauging what he thought wouldn’t pain his already sore throat on the way down. He must have taken too long because his thoughts were interrupted by Snape’s voice.

“Nothing to your liking?”

“No, it’s not that. I must have spaced out. Sorry,” Harry replied, shaking his head and instantly regretting it as it felt like he just smashed his head with a hammer several times. Hiding his wince, he reached for a few orange slices and scooped some oatmeal into a bowl for himself.

He could feel eyes on him the whole time he ate, only sucking the juices from the orange slices and then wrapping the dehydrated pulpy mess in a napkin as discretely as possible. He avoided eating the oatmeal and just stirred at it with his spoon.

“If you’re not going to eat on your own, what was the point of using a potion to get you back on track?”

Harry cringed. He put that man through so much trouble taking care of him and now he thought Harry didn’t care and was letting the effort go to waste. It made him feel so guilty.

“I…” He thought of just telling him that he wasn’t feeling well, but he didn’t want to be more of a burden.

“What is wrong?”

“Nothing. I must still be tired. I’m just a little distracted.” Harry then picked up his spoon and ate some of the oatmeal, cringing as he could feel each and every lump scraping it’s way down his throat.

Severus could see that something was definitely off about Harry. He obviously felt bad enough that he wouldn’t eat, but apparently not enough that he felt the need to inform anyone. Severus decided he would let Harry alone until the boy brought it up so that it wouldn’t seem like he was smothering the child.

“Very well,” he sighed. Then he smiled lightly. “What do you have planned for today?”

“Mmm… thought I’d finally go outside. I don’t even know what this house looks like from out there. Maybe I’ll get some flying practice in… not above the house, I remember.”

----

After breakfast, Harry went upstairs to get his Firebolt and then remembered that he shrank it at the end of the school year so that he could fit it in his trunk. Snape had already gone into his office to work on the syllabi for the coming school year and thought he left the door open a crack, Harry was still reluctant to bother him. More reluctant even, to bother him while he was behind a desk… it was much too reminiscent of school.

He decided that he would forget about flying and just go outside so he could look around and get a better feel for the place he was currently residing in. He could just ask Snape to un-shrink the broom at another time.

Since Harry didn’t know where the back door was or if there was one, he went out through the front door near the staircase.

The fresh air felt so good on his warm skin and a slight breeze ruffled his hair and soothed his headache a little. He decided that was what his problem must have been… cabin fever. Maybe his throat would stop aching after a while too.

The front yard was huge. Harry couldn’t even see if there was a road beyond it or not, but that could be due to the line of trees in the distance. There was a small stone path that went from the door to a small dirt driveway that he doubted was made for cars. He followed the path to the driveway so that he could see the whole house. He was right about the driveway. He could see that it had wheel marks worn into it. They looked to be about the same width as the carriages from school. Finally he looked up to the house.

It was very nice, in his opinion. It was cool gray stone with green granite outlining the windows and the door. Dark green shutters matched the roof. Harry could tell that the building was very old and the shutters and other things were newer additions to it. It looked so big too and the grass and the shrubbery were so green and Harry almost felt guilty about treading on the grass, but he did anyway. He took his time walking around the house to get to the back, basking in the sunlight on his way.

Behind the house, he saw a stone patio that connected to a sunroom that Harry hadn’t seen from the house and Snape had neglected to tell him about. There were stairs on each side and to the center of it so Harry had access to the patio from where he’d come from.

Once he was standing on the patio, he was able to see just how extravagant the yard was. The stairs from the center touched down on a stone path with rose bushes on each side. The path was straight until is spread out into a large oval with benches surrounding a large statue. Harry followed the path to the statue and saw that it was of Salazar Slytherin. From the oval, there were two more paths. Both went to the lake, One was to a large dock with a two wooden seats and near it was a bonfire pit. The other path led to a boat launch for the lake.

It was so beautiful that Harry felt like he would be breaking some sort of rule if he wandered outside of the designated paths. And so he decided to just follow the one that went to the dock. Relaxing in one of the seats over the lake seemed like a great idea to him.

He was right. The seats had to have been spelled for comfort because his muscles relaxed and he sighed with pleasure once he sank into the shaped wood. He watched serenely as the wind created little ripples in the water. The sound of small waves hitting the shore was like the most relaxing background music to him.

Harry didn’t even realize he’d fallen asleep until he blinked his eyes open and noticed that the sun was in a different place in the sky. Judging by how far west the sun had moved, he guessed he missed lunch and that dinner was soon approaching. He didn’t mind much about missing lunch since his throat still hurt, but he knew his guardian wouldn’t be too happy with it.

He pushed himself out of the chair and groaned when the headache slammed back at full force. Too much sun, he saw sure of it. He’d felt bad before after spending too much time working on the Dursley’s yard in the sunlight. He trudged back to the house, deciding to try out the back entrance to the sunroom that he’d seen before.

Inside of the room, he saw that the ceiling was all glass so that the sun lit it up. There were a few wicker chairs and a small table in the center of the room. The rest of the room was filled with plants. Some he recognized and other looked too strange to be real. He figured they must be for potions ingredients; after all… he was living with a Potions Master.

He found another door that connected the sunroom to the rest of the house and opened it to find himself in the hallway where the lab and the storage room were located. Now that he thought about it, he remembered seeing this door before but had assumed that it was just a closet and not another actual part of the house.

Now that he was inside, the smell of food assaulted his senses and he walked toward the dining area where the smell was coming from. His stomach gave a small lurch despite how delicious the smell was. His headache was definitely having an effect on the rest of his body. The longer he stayed standing upright, the shakier he felt. He hurried the last few feet to the dining area and he saw Snape setting down a plate of kabob skewers filled with peppers, tomatoes, mushrooms, and beef. Snape looked up when Harry entered and a small smile quirked at his mouth.

“Oh good. I was just about to go find you. Have you been outside this whole time?”

“Uh yeah… totally lost track.” Harry’s voice was quiet and breathy as his breathing sped up to join in with his increasing heart rate. Harry quickly sat down before he could fall down, feeling a lot better just with that small action. He helped himself to the frosty jug of water and poured himself a large cup, sipping enough to coat his parched sore throat. He waited until Snape sat down and served himself before he took a skewer for his own place. He grabbed a bread roll and picked at it a bit, avoiding eating anything.

“I lost track of time also, I admit. I trust you helped yourself to lunch while I was in my office?” Snape asked as he emptied a skewer onto his place and stabbed at a mushroom with his fork.

Harry paused in his break picking. He knew the other man wasn’t too happy with the meager breakfast Harry had managed to swallow so he’d probably be more upset if he knew that Harry’d skipped lunch also. But Snape had just handed Harry the perfect opportunity to lie straight to his face.

“I missed lunch” The lie had been right there and ready, but the truth beat it’s way out of Harry’s mouth before he could stop it and it made him cringe slightly.

“Harry, you barely at your breakfast and you’re barely eating now. Why did you skip lunch?”

“I didn’t mean to. I was out by the lake and I fell asleep.” He could feel Snape’s piercing gaze on him as he went back to playing with his food.

“It won’t happen again?”

It sounded like a question, but Harry could hear the period shoving the question mark out of it’s place.

“No, sir.”

“Good. We’ll not have you wasting away while you are under my care. Eat your dinner.”

A couple thoughts ran through Harry’s mind about how Snape only cared because he didn’t want to seem like a bad guardian. After all, the way he said that last sentence… it sounded almost as if he wanted Harry healthy only because he was under Snape’s own care, but Harry could waste away anywhere else and Snape wouldn’t mind a bit. But… Snape didn’t mean it like that, did he?

Harry’s own thoughts were confusing him and the shaky feeling was back again and this time an intense and sudden heat accompanied it. Harry could feel his head start to bead with sweat as his body tried to cool itself down.

He was trying to focus on the place in front of him so he could center himself, but his thinking was getting more muddled and it was getting harder for his eyes to see anything. It was like someone was pulling layers of white sheets over his eyes. He could also hear a voice speaking to him… oh yes, Snape. He couldn’t pick out the words over the roaring of his ear and then it was quiet.

----

Severus watched Harry after he’d spoken and waited for the child to finally start eating his meal, but he didn’t. Harry’s hands had stayed limp on the table as he stared at his food. Severus dropped his own fork when Harry’s face suddenly lost all it’s color and the ghostly white skin started to glisten with sweat.

“Harry?” he asked, concerned. Harry didn’t make any indication that he’d heard him.

Severus pushed his chair back and quickly approached the pale boy.

“Harry, what’s wrong?”

Then Harry started sinking to the side and Severus grabbed at him before he could fall of his chair and he gently guided Harry’s body down onto the floor. He leaned down and pressed his cheek against Harry’s forehead, trying to ignore that the child looked like death and he was almost surprised when the head felt cool against his skin instead of feverish like he’d expected. Harry’s skin was so clammy and moist. He grabbed Harry’s wrist and found the pulse racing and then everything fell together in his mind.

After a minute or two, Harry’s pulse slowed down enough for Severus to set his wrist back down and he watched for awareness to seep back into the boy. It wasn’t long before Harry’s eyes blinked open and Severus could see the confusion in them. Harry blinked again and then focused on Severus’s face.

“Snape? Uh… s’rry…. Professor…” Harry corrected himself

“Snape is fine if you prefer. How do you feel?”

“Um.. I don’t know. How did- why am I on the floor?” Harry moved to sit up and Severus quickly wrapped his arms around him and lifted him up. As soon as Harry was standing again, his face blanched once more and Severus hurried him over to lay down on the couch in the sitting room.

“You passed out. Too much sun and not enough fluids.

“Really? It didn’t feel like I passed out. I just… it was like I couldn’t see or hear anything. It was confusing.” Harry frowned.

“And how do you feel now?” Severus repeated the question he’d asked before. He took Harry’s wrist and checked his pulse again.

“Better… well better when I’m laying down. Not so good when sitting or standing.”

“You are dehydrated and your body is having a hard time getting blood to your head while you’re standing so it uses any means to get you lying flat so it can circulate blood where it is needed.” Severus explained in the simplest way that he could. Harry nodded slightly and winced. Severus pulled out a small potion bottle and handed it to him.

“For your head. I’ll get you some water.”

Severus went to the kitchen and filled a bottle and then charmed it to refill whenever it emptied. When he returned, Harry was half asleep already.

“Harry,” he roused him slightly. “I want you to drink this… not all at once. You’ll make yourself sick. Drink it throughout the night. I’ll let you rest for now.”

He left Harry to fall asleep again and he went back to the table but was unable to continue eating. He put everything away in the fridge as leftovers and spent the rest of the night in the living room, reading and watching over Harry until he carried the sleeping child upstairs and then retired himself for the night.

Fire, fire, fire… he was on fire!

No… it just felt like it. He was hot, burning… why was Harry so hot?

Harry kicked at the blanket that was holding him in the furnace and he opened his eyes.

Water… water, there! He saw the bottle from last night sitting on his nightstand. He tried to reach for it, but found that he barely had the strength to move. He took a couple of breaths… oh it hurt. His throat was so sore. He concentrated on the water and weakly reached out. His arm shook and he only succeeded in knocking the bottle to the floor.

He couldn’t hold in the small miserable whimper of frustration. He needed that water or he swore he would just burst into flame right there and then the bed would start on fire and spread around the room and eventually the whole house would burn up and Snape would be so mad at him but it wouldn’t matter because Harry’d already be dead. Wait… what?

He sighed and tried to ignore his own confusing thoughts. He gathered all his strength and pushed himself away from the bed and rolled onto the floor with a loud thud and a groan.

The hardwood floor was cold against his skin and it sent chills throughout his body. He still needed the water for his dry and hot throat, but the burning sensation in his body had been replaced with aching cold.

He lost track of the bottle, which had rolled under some piece of furniture. He couldn’t find the strength to pull himself back onto the bed so he tugged at his blanket, letting it fall over him and he curled into a small ball on the floor.

----

Severus awoke with a start. He looked around his room and saw that it was still before sunrise. He was about to fall back to sleep when he heard a thud that came from the direction of Harry’s room. Deciding to investigate the noise, he got out of bed and wrapped a night robe over his pajamas and went across the hall.

He knocked politely and waited a few moments. There was no answer and so he turned to go back to his room, but a soft cry stopped him. He opened the door this time without a knock.

“Lights,” he commanded softly. The room lit up and he saw the bundle on the floor with black hair sticking out from under a blanket.

“Harry?” He approached and pulled the blanket away from the child’s face.

“No, ‘m cold…” Harry muttered, looking up at him with glazed eyes. Severus pushed a lock of hair away from Harry’s face and gasped at the heat radiating from the skin.

“Child, you’re burning up!” Severus gathered the boy in his arms and set him on the bed, tucking the blanket around him. “Harry, can you tell me what feels bad?” he asked as he looked Harry over. He noticed what he’d originally thought was a fevered flush was actually more of a rash. He put his hands to the sides of Harry’s throat and the boy flinched away.

“Don’t… it hurts. Make it stop, please,” Harry pleaded, the fever sending his mind to a place where he didn’t care about sounding childish or weak and where adults were just supposed to know how to fix things no matter what.

“I’ll try, Harry. I promise. Just let me look you over so I can figure out what’s wrong.” Severus’s voice was soft and gentle. It was the same soothing tone he’d used when he would talk to his wife’s stomach, trying to make an imprint on his child’s memory before he was born.

After double checking Harry’s symptoms with his own memory, he was sure of what was wrong. It would have made him feel better except that there was no potion or spell to cure Scarlet Fever. He’d have to get the proper muggle antibiotics from Madame Pomphrey who always kept a stock of muggle medicines along with her usual potions.

“I’ll be back. I need to make a firecall.”

He used the fireplace in his office and Pomphrey assured him that she’d owl the medicine right away. Since magic (including magical transportation) diminished the effectiveness of muggle medicines. Until the owl arrived, he’d have to keep Harry’s fever as low as he could without magic.

He grabbed a bowl and a cloth from his bathroom and filled the bowl with cool (but not cold) water. He brought it to Harry’s room and set it on the nightstand. Harry seemed to be somewhere between sleep and awake so he wet the cloth and laid it on the boy’s head.

The bright green eyes startled open and Harry gasped.

“No… too cold. Please,” he groaned. He swatted at Severus’s hands.

“No, Harry. You have a fever that needs to be brought down.” He was soft but stern. Harry started to cry softly.

“Please… I’ll be good. Please…”

He didn’t know what to do. He needed to cool Harry down, but he hated seeing him cry like that.

“You’re not in trouble, Harry. You’re sick and that is why you feel so miserable.” He took Harry’s hands in his own to keep them from pulling the cloth away and he began to massage them lightly to calm Harry. The tears eventually stopped and Harry was staring at him.

“Would you like me to tell you a story?” Severus offered, hoping it would soothe him to sleep. Harry nodded with a small sigh.

“Alright….

Severus’s voice trailed off and he couldn’t take his eyes away from Harry, who looked to be asleep. He almost jumped when Harry’s eyes then opened slightly.

“Did they live happily ever after then?”

“I don’t know, Harry. Time will tell.”

Harry closed his eyes, accepting that answer, and he drifted off to sleep.

Severus breathed in shakily, wondering what had possessed him to tell that story. He could only hope that Harry was too feverish to remember it, though Severus doubted he would connect it to himself even if he did remember.

Severus also reminded himself to check the locking spell on the room that had been intended as a nursery. He’d never gotten around to actually cleaning it out. No, that wasn’t true. He’d never had the strength to.

----

An hour or so later, Severus had dressed and brought a chair over to Harry’s bed so that he could care for him more comfortably.

Harry had been sleeping fitfully when he awoke screaming and backing up against the headboard of the bed.

“Harry! Calm down, it’s a dream. Whatever it is, it’s just a dream.”

Harry wasn’t looking at him though. His attention was focused behind Severus and Severus turned, expecting to see what had terrified the boy. There was nothing.

“Harry?”

“There’s too many of them. I can’t… I can’t… why am I so hot? They’re supposed to make you cold, but they’re burning me!” Harry’s panicked voice grew to a hoarse shout as he tried to press himself into the headboard, practically clawed at it.

“Harry, please lie down. It’s not real.” Severus gently pushed Harry back down on the bed and Harry was too weak to fight him. Instead, Harry grabbed at Severus’s robes, clinging to them with all his strength.

“Please don’t let them get me,” he whispered. Severus pulled the child to his chest and let Harry hold onto him.

“Of course not. Nobody will take you from me. I will keep you save.” He ran a hand through Harry’s sweat-matted hair, trying to will some calming magic into Harry.

He’d heard about parents being able to calm their own babies with subtle magic, but he’d never had the chance to try and Harry was hardly a baby anymore. Surprisingly, Harry’s body did begin to relax and his breathing evened out. Severus didn’t know if it was from the rumored magic or the comfort of being held. He indulged in his own paternal wants and kept the boy in his embrace even though it was no longer needed. He sat like that until the heat from Harry seeped through his robes and reminded him of the fever.

He gently laid Harry back onto the pillows and put the damp cloth back on his head.

At that moment there was a tapping on the window and he pulled his wand to spell it open. The owl that entered the room was Harry’s own owl, Hedwig. Severus berated himself for not noticing that the bird had not been with Harry this whole time. He’d totally forgotten about the bird.

Hedwig brought him an envelope that contained a plastic pill bottle and a short note that contained directions to make sure Harry took one pill three times a day until the bottle was empty.

“Thank you, Hedwig. There is a small structure to the right side of the house where I keep my owls. Please treat yourself to a meal and stay. I’m sure that Harry misses you.” He sent the owl away.

Before waking Harry, Severus made sure he had one pill out and the bottle of water that he’d found knocked on the floor earlier.

“Harry, wake up. I have medicine.” Severus tried to wake Harry gently, but he slept deeply this time. When verbal prompts failed, Severus had to gently prod the child out of sleep by shaking him. This resulted in a terrified Harry who batted away the intruding hands and curled himself into a ball in the corner of the bed.

“Harry… Harry, look at me.”

The little ball shivered slightly, but made no other movements to indicate he’d heard of understood. Severus reached out to Harry, laying a hand on one knee and Harry jerked back, almost falling off the bed if Severus hadn’t grabbed him quickly.

“I’ve got you. You’re alright. I know you’re scared… you are miserable and confused. You are hot and your mind feels muddied. I’ll take care of you… I’ll keep you safe and help you get better.” Severus wrapped the unresponsive child in an embrace once again and rocked him gently for a while.

“Snape?” A muffled voice finally asked. Harry pulled away from the robes where his face had been buried.

“Yes, Harry. I’m here. I have your medicine.” Severus let Harry pull away and he retrieved the pill and water.

“Medicine? For what?”

“You’re sick.”

“Oh, okay…” Harry, while more lucid than before, was still not himself. He took the pill without further question or complaint and drank the water, emitting a soft sigh at the cooling sensation the liquid brought to his throat. He smiled, pulling the bottle away.

“Water… good.”

“Yes but drink slowly so you don’t sick up.”

“Mmmkay…” Harry was already drifting again, slowly falling back against the pillows and Severus caught the water bottle before it could fall from Harry’s hands. He guided the small body in the right direction and gently tucked the blankets around Harry as the boy slept on again.

Harry awoke slowly and noticed he was having more trouble breathing than usual. It wasn’t really that he was having any real trouble, it was just different. Something was weighing him down a bit.

He opened his eyes against the harsh light of morning and grimaced at how… ‘yuck’ his eyes felt… like his eyelids were made of sandpaper. Well, maybe not that harsh. He looked down and saw Snape’s head on his chest like Harry was a pillow. The professor looked stressed even asleep.

Harry took stock of himself, trying to find a reason for the other man’s presence. That’s when he noticed how dirty he felt, like he was covered in dried sweat. He looked around as well as he could without disturbing Snape. A bowl of water was on his nightstand along with a bottle of pills. On the other side of the room, he could see that his desk was full of packages and letters.

Now, the packages on the desk. Harry gently lifted Snape’s head off of his chest and scooted himself to the other side of the bed and put a pillow under the man’s head. Then he got up from the bed… and fell straight to the floor.

“Harry!” Snape’s head shot up as he was startled from his sleep. He looked around in confusion before realizing his situation and seeing Harry on the floor. Harry almost laughed when he saw the embarrassment on the man’s face before it was hidden and concern for Harry took over.

“Harry, you shouldn’t be up and wandering about yet. As you’ve just found out, you are still weakened from being ill.”

Snape circled around the bed and helped Harry back onto it. Harry then noticed his own arms and a red rash on the inside of his elbows.

“How long was I sick? What do I have?” Harry asked, distractedly as he examined himself looking for more rash sites.

“Scarlet Fever. There’s no magical cure so it took longer to get it under control… your birthday was yesterday. I left the gifts from your friends on your desk.”

“Scarlet Fever? But I thought that was some old disease that people didn’t get anymore… and where did I get it? I’ve been here with you most of this time.”

“Scarlet Fever is nothing more than another strain of the strep virus. People do still get it… especially if they are especially sensitive to it or if their immune systems are not up to par. As for how you were exposed to it… I’m afraid that might be my fault. I’ve had to go out a few times while you were asleep. I spent several of those visits with an acquaintance that was taking care of an ill grand daughter. I may have carried the virus back and your immune system has not fully recuperated yet… and when you overtaxed your body with dehydration and too much sun, you had no defenses and the illness took over quite quickly.”

Harry nodded and held out his arms. “And the rash?”

“That is where Scarlet Fever gets its name. The red rash that appears on the face and neck and sometimes other parts of the body.”

“It’s on my face?! Great…” Harry moaned self consciously, making Snape chuckle.

“Do not worry about that. While there is no magical cure, there is a salve that will help heal the rash quickly. You can apply the salve twice a day while you take your muggle medicine.” Snape went through the process of tucking Harry bad in bed much to Harry’s annoyance. He felt better and did not want to stay in bed. He also needed a shower.

“So I saw a doctor?” Harry motioned to the pill bottle.

“No need. When I knew what was wrong, I had Madame Pomphrey send the proper medication.”

“But you can’t diagnose! You’re not a doctor.”

Snape leaned back and crossed his arms.

“Would you like to see my Medi-Wizardry degree? I assure you, I am quite qualified to diagnose and treat you.”

“But how… you’re a Potions Master, not a Medi-Wizard.”

“Do you think they let anyone become a Potions Master? To become one, you must be a qualified medi-wizard or witch. Remember what we talked about with the Dreamless Sleep potion? One wrong move and a helpful potion becomes a dangerous one.”

“Oh,” Harry felt pretty dumb then and couldn’t think of anything to say in response.

“Do you think you can eat today? You weren’t able to eat while yore fever was too high, but I was able to get you to drink some nutrient potions.”

Harry really didn’t feel hungry, but nodded anyway. He was expected to eat and he knew Snape would be unhappy if he didn’t. Snape then left him to go to the kitchens and Harry contemplated attempting to reach the desk again, but found himself unable to lift the blanket from his body. He realized it must have been a spell, but he couldn’t recall Snape reciting any spells or using his wand.

“Argh, now what? I can’t even reach my book.” Harry glared at ‘The Once and Future King’ sitting on his nightstand, wishing he could call on accidental magic to give him his book… or anything thing else to keep him from getting bored while he was stuck in his bed.

Harry settled on reciting every defensive spell he’d learned in the past year and then trying to think of happy memories to call on for a patronus until Snape came back into the room with a tray that held a bowl of soup and a glass of orange juice.

“Sit up. Don’t want you to choke on the soup.” Snape said.

“Haha, funny. You know I can’t sit up.”

“You can now. It’s a commonly used non-verbal wandless spell that many parents learn and use on their children.”

“Then how do you know it?” Harry almost sneered.

Snape stiffened slightly, but his face remained impassive.

“I did my research in preparation for your arrival.”

Normally subtleties went over the Gryffindor’s head, but this time he definitely noticed that something was off with Snape’s tone when he said that. Maybe the man did have some mysterious kids in hiding that he never got to visit? No, his wife was dead so who else would they be with? He probably was just feeling bad because his wife had died before he could have any children. It seemed like the best explanation Harry could come up with and it almost made him feel sorry for the older man, but he quickly brushed that feeling away.

“Ahh… chicken noodle, of course.” Harry observed when he sat up and Snape set the tray in front of him.

“It’s good for the immune system,” Snape stated. “As is the orange juice. But if your throat is too raw for that kind of acidity, I will bring milk. And take your medicine. I’ve got the salve for you to apply when you finish your meal.”

----

For the next few days, Severus hovered over Harry until he was sure that Harry was back to his normal level of health. After that, they settled into a comfortable routine that included time spent together when Harry wanted to learn more about potions. He was finding it much more interesting now that things were actually being explained to him.

And since Harry’s sickness, most of the tentative awkwardness had faded. For Harry, it was knowing that he had been so dependent on Snape and the man hadn’t minded, and also that he had held onto him in his fevered state and that hadn’t been used for any sort of teasing.

For Severus, it was that he’d felt needed by Harry and that he’d been able to take care of his son. And now they were bonding somewhat. He’d helped Harry with his homework until it was finished and he sometimes ventured outside to watch Harry fly on his beloved broomstick.

Severus was thinking that with things going as well as they were, he might tell Harry the whole truth soon. He just needed to get up the guts and prepare himself. He was no Gryffindor and the situation made him quite nervous.

A fortnight (two weeks) before school was scheduled to begin, Harry was jolted awake after a strange and terrifying dreams and his hands immediately shot to his scar. It was burning to bad as if someone had held a paperclip over a flame and pressed it into his skin.

He bit his lip to keep from crying out and he could taste blood from how hard his teeth bit into the fragile pink skin. He thought about waking Snape, but knew that it would worry the man if he knew that Harry’s curse scar was giving him pain.

So he needed to get rid of this pain and a pain relief potion was out of the question. He also wanted to get the dream images out of his head… watching an innocent old man getting killed for no reason. It almost made him want to sick up.

That’s when Harry remembered the raggedy pillow he’s brought from his cupboard and what he had hidden in it. Dudley was a total pothead and Harry never minded it. When Dudley was stone, he was much more calm and didn’t bother with beating Harry up. One time when Harry was cleaning Dudley’s room, he found the stash and he had filched a few joints from him. Harry hadn’t had any terrible motives behind the theft. He wasn’t planning on using drugs recreationally. He’d just wanted to spite Dudley in some way. But he’d heard about cancer patients using marijuana for pain relief and Dudley had once told him that it made everything seem better when he was in a bad mood. It seemed like a good reason to save the joints. He knew the Dursleys would never give him anything for pain if he so needed it. That was all Harry knew about drugs and it seemed to fit his situation at the current moment.

While he thought about his choices, Harry forced his eyes open and pulled his hands away from his scar. According to the darkness outside, it was still night. There was no way he would bother Snape out of a night’s sleep.

The decision was made and Harry rolled over and reached for the pillow hidden under his mattress. He unzipped it and a small plastic baggie with two rolled joints fell out. His stomach gave a twist, reminding Harry that was he was doing was not considered ‘okay’. If it had been okay then Dudley wouldn’t have demanded Harry to keep quiet and never tell Vernon or Petunia about it. Harry knew drugs were wrong, but he just couldn’t figure out why they were so bad. They seemed to make people happy enough.

He ignored the uncomfortable feeling in his gut, the pain in his head far outweighed it, and he grabbed one joint and stumbled out of bed and out of his room. On his way down the stairs, he tried to think of a way to light the thing. He couldn’t use his want in the summer and he didn’t own a lighter- oh! Snape always had a box of matches in the lab for when he had to heat a magic-sensitive potion.

Quietly and very paranoid, Harry snuck into the lab and quickly grabbed one match and headed outside. Once out o the back porch, he struck the match against the stone wall of the house. He hesitated as his pulse nervously thundered in his neck. Then he saw in his mind the ugly green light and he forgot about his nerves. He brought the flame up to the marijuana cigarette that he held to his mouth and he breathed in to get it lit.

He immediately gagged on the horrible taste that filled his mouth. It tasted as if he had just grabbed a pile of dirt and eaten it.

“Bloody hell…” he muttered. This time he braced himself for the gross taste and he did as he’d seen Dudley do many times. He breathed in a drag and then held it for a moment before letting it out with a small cough. With a small shrug, he repeated the process several times until he was finished and then he smushed what was left into the ground and kicked a little dirt over it.

“… And there is nothing.” Harry sighed, not feeling any different. He assumed that maybe it had lost it’s potency just sitting in his pillow all that time, but he still had no desire to go back into the house to sleep. He didn’t want the dream to come back. He wandered down to the benches that surrounded the Salazar statue and sat down.

A few seconds or minutes after sitting down, Harry was overwhelmed with a flush of heat and a sensation that he was tipping to the side, but he could clearly see that he wasn’t. He reveled in that falling feeling a bit, closing his eyes once in a while to make it feel more intense. He realized then that the drug must have finally come into affect. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, but eventually he decided to move from his seat near the statue and he stood up to walk down to the lake.

It was so strange, this feeling almost like vertigo but without the dizzying effects. Then Harry noticed as he walked very purposefully that each step he took felt like it took forever but when it ended, it felt as if it had happened so fast. He was so fascinated by his own footsteps and the slight time distortion that he almost didn’t notice he’d already started walking on the wooden dock on the lake.

If he hadn’t noticed where he was already, he probably would have fallen in the lake and he would have been screwed. He never learned how to swim and so he would have surely drowned. The morbid though made him giggle a little and he knew somewhere in side that it was definitely not funny and that laughing was probably not an appropriate reaction to thoughts of his death, but he quickly forgot about it as he plopped down to watch the rippling waves in the water.

He dipped his bare feet in the water and noticed that every time the ripples change, he could find pictures in the water. Some of the pictures amused him… like the one of the man with squid arms. He watched the pictures for a while as they changed, making him chuckle every so often.

Suddenly he remembered the reason he’d smoked the pot in the first place… but it didn’t seem to bother him as much as it did before. It wasn’t as if the dream was real anyways. He realized that his scar didn’t even hurt anymore… actually, when he reached up to rub at it, he realized he couldn’t even feel it. With this little discovery, Harry pinched his arm. He could feel it, but just barely. His numbness kind of annoyed Harry, but only a little.

----

Severus slowly became aware of a clanging noise inside his head that signaled the wards on his lab being broken. He’d set the wards right before he retrieved Harry from the muggles, remembering the kid’s insatiable curiosity and his knack for getting into trouble. After he’d gotten to know Harry a little better, he didn’t see the need for the wards and had almost forgotten about them until just now.

He figured now that Harry had probably had a nightmare of some sort and didn’t want to bother Severus for a Dreamless Sleep Potion and so set off in search for one on his own. It had to been Harry as the property wards were still in place, making sure that nobody stepped foot on Severus’s property without first gaining permission.

There was no need to hurry then, so Severus took time to find and slip on his robe and slippers. He was aware that he looked nothing like the intimidating persona he’d taken years to perfect, but he didn’t mind since he was trying to distance himself from that person for Harry.

He plodded down the stairs and went to his lab. He opened the door and saw that the room was empty. Harry’d already left it. So he went back upstairs to check for Harry in his bedroom and try to talk to him. It was also empty and he was about to turn back to continue his search, but he spotted something on Harry’s bed.

He went over to the bed and picked up a small baggie that had been left.

“Damn,” he sighed. One marijuana joint. “Damn, damn, damn.”

He knew Harry hadn’t smoked it in the room because there was no trace of the telltale smell that marijuana left. But the boy was obviously doing drugs.

Fuming, Severus stormed back to his room and exchanged his slippers for shoes and then hurried back downstairs and through the solarium to the back yard. His nose wrinkled in disgust from the lingering smell on the patio. From where he stood, he could just barely see the form of Harry sitting on the dock under the moonlight. He muttered several profanities as he stomped down the path to the lake.

“Harry James Potter!” he yelled when he neared the water.

Harry turned to face him, his feet ripping up out of the water and his torso swaying as he almost lost his balance and fell backwards. He caught himself in time and turned his dilated red eyes upwards.

“Yeah?”

For a moment, Severus was struck speechless. He was deeply angry but this was a situation he had not thought to prepare for and now the boy didn’t even have the decency to realize he was in trouble.

With a small growl, Severus held up the baggie that he hadn’t let go of yet. That’s when Harry’s drugged up mind finally got up with the situation.

“Oh.”

“Oh? You’ve just been caught with muggle drugs and you say ‘oh’? What were you thinking? You’re just a child. You can’t afford to screw yourself up with-”

“I’m not a child.”

Severus fixed Harry with a glare that would make any other student wet themselves.

“You are only fourteen… a child. What would possess you to do this? Have you been getting high behind my back this whole time?”

“No. It was the first time… my first time ever.”

“Why? Why now?”

“Because it hurt!” Harry was standing now; close enough to Severus that the sickly sweet smell surrounding Harry made Severus take a step back.

“What hurt?”

“All of it. His face when the light hit and… ugh, and the snake and Pettigrew was there. And then my scar… And it was too much so I remembered that I took them from Dudley and he said they make it better so I tried to make it better and it worked!”

“What?” He wasn’t able to make much sense of Harry’s fragmented story.

“The dream.”

“A dream? You went and did drugs because of a dream? That’s… I don’t even know how I am to respond to that! Just… go to your room. We’ll discuss a proper punishment in the morning. I can’t deal with you while I’m this angry.”

“It never stopped you before.” Harry smirked.

“Harry, just go.”

“No. I won’t go back in there just to sleep again.”

“Yes, you will.”

“No, I bloody won’t. Stop telling me what to do! You may be my guardian, but you’re not my father!’

“YES, I AM!” Severus exploded.

Everything went still for a moment until Harry leaned forward and narrowed his eyes.

“What?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out that way. I’ve been waiting for the right time to-”

“No, stop… just stop.” Harry held up his hands. He stared at Severus with disgust and disbelief. “You… you’re cracked,” he muttered. Without anything more, Harry shoved passed Severus and ran up to the house, leaving the man alone.

“Merlin… now what, Marguerite? This isn’t how it was supposed to be.”

Harry was lying flat on his bed, still awake. He’d heard Snape… his father? No! He’d heard Snape retreat back to his own room or his office some time ago, but he couldn’t get back to sleep himself.

He was trying to either not think about Snape’s confession or concentrate on it fully, but he couldn’t do either one. He wasn’t able to keep his thoughts away from the topic fully… so he tried to analyze it, but his mind would drift and he couldn’t make his mind any clearer.

He was greatly frustrated by the lack of control he had over his thoughts at the moment and as time went by he was beginning to really hat how the pot was making him feel. It was fine at first, even a little fun and freeing, but now his whole body was numb and he kept feeling as if he was just sitting in the back of his own mind… like he didn’t really exist. Every time the feeling of not being real became too much, he would shake his head to bring himself back to the present and be certain that he was real.

“How much longer does this stuff last?” He muttered almost tearfully. It was beginning to drive him insane.

When shaking his head began to lose it’s effectiveness, Harry tried to pinch hi skin, but he could just barely even feel it. He needed something else to make sure he didn’t just fade into existence. He wished his scar were still hurting so he could have that to concentrate on.

An idea came to him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew it was a screwed up idea, but desperate times really called for desperate measures and that made it okay in his mind.

Harry got out of bed and opened his school trunk, which was still mostly full. He grabbed a quill set and dumped it on the floor. A blade that was used for the sharpening of broken or dull quills was at the top of the pile.

Picking it up, he was momentarily mesmerized by the light reflected off the metal. Harry held the blade over his left arm. He pressed the sharp end against the soft skin on the inside of his arm, not hard enough to draw blood but enough to make a dent. Then he took a deep breath and swiped quickly, pushing deeper as the blade moved. It had barely stung, but it was enough to keep his mind in place.

The blood took a second to well up, but then it trickled over and a small crimson stream ran from his arm to his wrist and dripped slowly onto the floor. It was fascinating to watch, but when Harry felt himself begin to fade once more, he panicked and swiped the blade again. As a precaution, Harry repeated the process twice more and stared in awe at the red river he’d created.

When the blood flow began to slow down, Harry lost interest in staring at it. He grabbed a spare towel from the bathroom, careful not to drip on the way there. Then he cleaned the floor and put the blade away. The last thing he cleaned was his arm. Some of the blood had begun to dry and it almost amused him how it flaked off like paint.

With everything finally cleaned up, Harry finally felt like he could fall asleep. The nightmare that started it all was long forgotten and dreams were no longer feared.

----

Morning came much too soon in Harry’s opinion. He wanted to curse the sun for even daring to shine when he’d only gotten a few hours of real sleep. Then Harry remembered why he’d gotten so little sleep and everything that had happened.

He’d smoked pot.

He was caught.

Snape said he was Harry’s father.

Harry’d cut himself.

“Oh no, oh no, oh… crap.” Harry brought his arm up to look at the damage. What had he been thinking? This was crazy people stuff! Was he crazy?

“No… I’m not crazy. It was a one time thing… and the pot… oh God. They should really tell kids why they shouldn’t do drugs… like in school or something.” Harry wanted to cry, he was so full of regret. He buried his face in his arms and gagged at the smell of his own body. He smelled of marijuana and sweat. Gross.

Wanting to delay his confrontation with Snape and also feeling the need to be clean, Harry decided a shower would come before anything else.

----

Severus sat at the dining table and waited for Harry. He’d heard the shower head turn on so he new it wouldn’t be much longer until the boy came downstairs.

After last night, they had a lot to talk about and all of it was big. Severus didn’t know which topic he should start with.

The truth about Harry’s parentage was the most important to him, but he didn’t want to go from explaining it all straight to lecturing Harry about drugs and then doling out a punishment. But he couldn’t just forget about it either. It would be bad parenting. He decided he would let Harry dictate the order of the conversation.

After about fifteen minutes of internal arguments, he finally saw Harry enter with his hair still wet and sticking up all over the place. He sat silently in the seat next to Severus with his eyes staring down at a small imperfection in the wood of the table. Severus took note of the long sleeved shirt that Harry chose to wear on such a hot day.

“Are you feeling ill?” he asked, Harry’s health his first priority.

“No… just feeling awkward.”

Severus nodded, thinking that covering up with clothing might be a defense mechanism that they both shared.

“We have some things to discuss this morning. Each of them is important. Which would you like to start with?”

“Um… The, you know… I was really dumb to do that, I know. The pot was… ugh…” Harry sputtered, glaring now at the knot in the wood.

“No, you were not dumb, but you certainly did act like it. Maybe you could tell me about how you acquired the drugs and why.”

Harry looked up with a surprised face like he’d been expecting World War III and not a civil conversation.

“I took them from Dudley’s room. I don’t know why… probably just some way of secretly getting back at him a little bit. And I kept them… just in case.” Harry shrugged. “I knew they were supposed to dull pain a bit and that I would never get anything if I was hurt unless it was something that couldn’t be hidden. It wasn’t like I wanted to be like Dudley and smoke pot all the time.”

“I believe you. You don’t seem like a person who would regularly take part in recreational drugs. That is why I was so surprised to find you in that state last night. But what prompted you to use it last night, Harry?”

“I told you already.”

“Yes, but you weren’t exactly making sense. I gathered that you had a dream…” Severus trailed off and waited for Harry to continue.

“It was… there was this old man and a snake… but I was the snake, I think? And this old house and Peter Pettigrew was there and he was talking to this ugly looking thing… called him master… maybe it was Voldemort. But then they killed the man. The green light just like the one I see when the dementors get close…”

“Harry, this sounds like you just had a nightmare and it’s no wonder after everything you’ve been through these past years.”

“But my scar hurt when I woke up.”

That startled Severus and he remembered that Harry had mentioned his scar the night before but he hadn’t thought much of it at the time. He would need to inform Albus, but Harry needn’t worry yet.

“If your scar begins to hurt again, inform me… no matter what time it is.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good. Now… you do know that doing drugs is wrong, yes?”

“Yeah… But I’m not really sure why. They make Dudley nicer. It made my scar stop hurting and the dream not so frightening. It actually felt good for a while. I hated it at the end and didn’t like how long it lasted though, so I don’t get it… why people do them for fun so much.”

“Well… drugs will affect everyone differently. I, for one, am glad that you don’t ‘get it’. As for why drugs are bad… each drug is different. Marijuana can impair your judgment, slow your reflexes… some drugs are quite dangerous and will kill easily. Your biggest concern would be that you couldn’t have defended yourself very well last night if you needed to. Your reaction time was considerably slower from what I saw and you weren’t too smart going out on the lake like that.” Severus sighed and leaned forward. “What if you had fallen in the water? Would you have been thinking clearly enough to figure out which way was up and then get yourself out of there?”

“I don’t know how to swim at all… So no.” Harry cringed.

“You could have died! You almost did fall in when I startled you last night.”

“I’m sorry, okay. I know… it was really stupid.”

“You do know also that you will have to be punished?”

Harry nodded.

“I received an owl from Arthur Weasley. You also received one from your friend, Ron Weasley.” Severus handed Harry his letter, but Harry made no move to open it.

“How did they know to send it here?”

“I imagine either the headmaster informed them or Arthur knows because word gets around at the ministry. They wrote to invite you to accompany them to the World Quidditch Tournament.”

Harry’s face lit up and he almost began to bounce in his seat.

“What? Really?”

“Yes, really.” Severus mocked. He didn’t smile and his serious face got through to Harry and the smile faded from the boy’s face.

“I don’t think you should go. You shouldn’t be receiving such a reward after what transpired last night.”

He watched Harry for a reaction. He could see that Harry wanted to protest, but knew that he deserved this punishment.

“There’s nothing else I could do? I could do chores all day every day until we go back to school… and stay locked in my room when I’m not working. Or maybe I could-”

“Harry, punishments are supposed to be punishments. Do you really think you should be able to go to the Quidditch Tournament after last night?”

“No.”

“Then it’s settled. Would you like to write back to the Weasleys or should I?”

“I’ll do it.”

“Good. You may do that later. Right now we have other matters to discuss. Last night, what I said-”

“Is it true? Are you my… are we… you know?” Harry asked. Severus nodded.

“Yes. I am… your father. It’s true.”

Harry scowled slightly at how Snape had phrased it. He felt like Luke Skywalker at that moment.

“So you and my mum…?”

“No, not Lily. She’s not your mother.”

Harry stood from his seat. He needed to move around, get away, and there was no place to go. He didn’t want to hear this, but he knew he needed to. It just didn’t make sense.

“But… No, this can’t be true. I look just like James Potter. Everybody tells me so! And I have my mum’s eyes! LOOK AT ME! You aren’t here at all!” Harry knew he was beginning to sound hysterical, but Snape was the crazy one making things up because he missed his family.

“Stop! Harry, just calm down. It is true and I will explain everything.”

Harry just shook his head, denying everything. He wasn’t sure when Snape had stood up and approached him, but he pushed away at the hands that tried to gently guide him to the couch in the living room.

“Just please sit down.” Snape sounded tired… or emotionally weary. Harry nodded, feeling slightly guilty and he obeyed. He heard Snape ‘Accio’ something and then there was a dip in the cushions next to him as Snape sat down.

“This is a picture of Lily, James, Marguerite and I.”

Harry looked over. Snape was holding a photo album for Harry to look at. His eyes were drawn to the picture Snape was pointing at where he saw James and a lady standing together. He gasped slightly.

“That woman… she looks just like-”

“That is Marguerite. She’s your mother. She’s James Potter’s fraternal twin. Part of the reason you look so much like James is because you actually look a lot like your mother.”

“But my eyes. Neither of you have green eyes. That puts a big hole in your story.”

“I did say Marguerite being James’s twin was part of the reason for your looks. There are also a number of spells over you, hiding your true appearance… hiding any traits you may have inherited from me. Your eyes are only the product of a well done glamour charm.”

Harry flinched at the tone that Snape used, the one that he most often used in school when a student answered a question incorrectly.

“I don’t even… my parents aren’t my parents… my face isn’t even my own face. I don’t even know what I look like.” Harry brought his hands up to feel his face, the face he’d known all his life. “But how- I mean why did- the story! You told me a story when I was sick. And it was true, wasn’t it?” Harry felt slightly dizzy as he was flooded with realization. He didn’t even hear Snape’s answer.

“I was kidnapped. Oh my God… I’m like those kids on the telly that they make movies about. Why is it always me? Why can’t I go one year without some earth shattering revelation about my life coming into the open? Why can’t I just be a normal kid? Who am I? My life has been turned on me so many times, I don’t know anymore! WHO AM I?” His yelling left him breathless and his chest felt tight. He tried to catch his breath, but the tightness made it impossible to expand his lungs and he could only take small rapid breaths that gave him no oxygen.

Oh God… he was going to die. He couldn’t breathe and he was going to die after he’d faced death and lived so many different times. He thought he could hear Snape telling him something, but the words were muffled and he couldn’t understand.

Harry was vaguely aware of something touching his lips and sliding down his throat as he tried to breathe. His vision was just beginning to fade when he finally found how to make his lungs work. The new oxygen made his head feel floaty, but at least he could hear again and he focused on Snape’s voice.

“Harry? Are you alright now?”

Harry nodded and looked at Snape who was now kneeling in front of him, holding a glass phial.

“Calming Draught,” Snape explained as he reached a hand to Harry’s face. Harry flinched back and then noticed then that his face was wet. Had he been crying?

He wiped his own tears away, roughly.

“Sorry,” Harry croaked, embarrassed.

“Don’t be. I know this is a shock to you. It was for me.”

“When was that? How long have you known and not told me?” Harry turned an accusing glare at Snape.

“I found out a week before I took you from the Dursleys.” Snape held up a hand to keep Harry from speaking. “I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you would reject the facts and reject me. I was planning on informing you soon. I wanted to know that I wouldn’t lose you again.”

Harry opened his mouth to reply and shut it again. He hadn’t even bothered to think of how Snape felt. This man had lost his family and grieved for them… and then found out that he had grieved over one of them erroneously. To have missed out on your child’s life for so long.

“So… if my d- if James have never… never taken me?

“You would have been raised here. You would have been loved and taken care of.”

The last sentence triggered an odd feeling for Harry and a lump formed in his throat. He’d never felt loved by anyone before. He was sure that Lily and James had loved him, his scar was proof of that, but it wasn’t a feeling he could remember. As his breathing hitched, Snape spoke.

“Harry, you are loved. Surely you know that?”

Harry just shook his head, afraid that speaking would break the dam and he would start crying again.

“Harry…” It sounded as if the older man was as close to tears as he was and suddenly arms were around Harry and he was pulled into a warm embrace, his face buried in the black robes that smelled like aftershave and cinnamon. In any other state of mind, Harry might have laughed at the mugglish-ness of the smell, but not now. The comfort of the embrace gave Harry the security to let go and he couldn’t stop once he began to cry.

“How? How can I be? The Dursleys never have and you can’t just decide that you love me. You’ve only known me this summer.”

“When a child is born, do their parents not love the baby immediately? I do love you.”

“If you do, it’s only because I’m your… I’m your son. Not because you actually love who I am.” Even though he denied the proclaimed love, Harry could not pull away from the warmth and comfort of Snape’s arms.

“If I had not been blinded by my own bitterness and jealousy, I would have seen who you are and I would have let myself love the boy I’d thought to be my nephew. It’s my own fault that I never got to know you. Finding out that you are mine did have influence on me, I will admit, but I didn’t know who you were. I loved you but I did not think I would like you. Now I know how wrong I was. You, Harry, are a selfless, kind, caring boy and I love who you are.” The arms tightened and Harry wrapped his arms around Snape’s torso and held just as tightly until his tears stopped and his breathing was left shuddering and hiccupping.

“I need…”Harry swallowed and pulled away so he could face the man who was his father. “I need to know more. Please tell me everything.”

Severus looked at the boy in front of his eyes and knew what he needed.

“I had been friends with Lily Evans since before I can remember. We lived in the same neighborhood. My father was a muggle… and I lived with him for most of my childhood. While on the train to Hogwarts our first year, Lily befriended Marguerite Potter and I was introduced also. I met James Potter and his friends that day too. Already popular with many of the children, having grown up as purebloods and being in home-school groups with many of them. At the sorting, James and Lily went to Gryffindor while Marguerite and I went to Slytherin. Yes, you are the Gryffindor son of two Slytherins.” Severus paused to smile fondly at Harry.

“Being housed with Marguerite, we did become good friends… better because of Lily encouraging us to group together for projects and study groups. By our sixth year, we were steadily dating and James disapproved. During summer holiday, he sent me an owl in her handwriting to break up with me. By this time, I was not living with my father anymore and I was surrounded by peers who did not have the best influence on me. They became my support when my heart was broken and I was distraught enough to be taken in by them. It was through their influence that I became a Death eater.

“When school was back in session, Marguerite was upset that I had not written her at all… and when she found out what James had done, she was livid. But when I told her what I had done, it broke her heart… but she still loved me. I regretted my decision and I went to the headmaster. He helped me and I became a spy for the side of the light.

“Marguerite and I continued our relationship in secret. I never wanted to risk her life by letting the Dark Lord know I was involved with her. After school ended, Marguerite inherited Salazar’s Sanctuary while James received the property in Godric’s Hollow. I continued my education under an apprenticeship. I quickly received my mastery since I had gotten my medi-wizardry license while I was still at Hogwarts. After I received my mastery, I proposed to Marguerite and we married in secret with only James, Lily, and Albus Dumbledore as witnesses.

“When Marguerite became pregnant, we thought it was safest for her to move in with James and Lily since I was away so often. It was sent away toward the end of the pregnancy. When I returned home… you were both gone. Well, she was and I thought you were.” Severus sighed, remembering how he felt as he was told of his family’s deaths while he stared at Lily and the baby she held.

Harry was now leaning against the arm of the couch with a pillow clutched in a tight hug. He looked up at Severus with a curious glint in his eyes.

“When I first came here, you said that your wife was descended from Slytherin. So… I am the heir of Slytherin?”

“The Potter family line is descended from both Gryffindor and Slytherin. One of Slytherin’s granddaughters married a Gryffindor. The families had been enemies since Salazar left Hogwarts and when this romance was found out, the girl was cast out of the family and left with nothing but this bit of property… which may seem quite opulent, but it’s nothing compared to what the Slytherin family had at the time. This is why you can open the chamber of secrets, but you are not the heir of Slytherin. The heir can only be from part of the line that would still be acknowledged by Salazar. You are, however, the heir of Gryffindor… the headmaster did tell me how you pulled the sword of Gryffindor from the hat”

“I’m the heir of… wait, so I didn’t get the Parseltongue from Voldemort?”

“We had thought it was from him since James never did possess that ability, but now that we know your true lineage… you most likely inherited that gift from your mother.”

Harry nodded, seeming satisfied with that answer and a bit relieved.

“What happens now?”

“Well, that could be up to you. If you’d like, we can work on getting the spells off of you that are hiding your true appearance. The truth would come out in public eventually if you do.”

Harry nodded.

“Yes… I want that. I don’t like not knowing what I look like. I’ve spent too much of my life not knowing anything about myself. But what I meant was, what happens with us? Are you going to be like my dad now? I know… I know you’re my father, but that doesn’t really-”

“Harry, stop. Yes, I’m your father… yes, I’m your dad. I don’t expect you to start calling me that after it has all come as such a shock to you. But yes… I am your dad.”

There were no more tales of history told to Harry that day, as Severus knew that he had much to absorb already.

Severus fire called Albus and asked him to check the pensieve to find all the spells that James had used on Harry. He knew that he would not be able to watch that particular memory again. An owl arrived at dinner with a list of spells and all of the counters for them.

He looked up from the message to see Harry’s questioning eyes upon him.

“If you’d still like, I now have the means to reverse the spells on your appearance.”

“Oh yes, please!” Harry dropped his fork in his excitement.

“Very well. Finish your dinner and we’ll adjourn to your bedroom.”

“Sir- er Fath-… sir… I don’t think I could eat more now. I’m too excited and nervous.”

Severus nodded with understanding.

“Head upstairs then and put on some comfortable, loose fitting pajamas so the change can take place with as little discomfort as possible. I’ll clean the dishes tonight.

“Oh, but that’s my chore to-”

“Harry, please. Many of the counter-spells work with your magic. The process will be quite draining for you. Just make sure you are ready when I come upstairs.

“Alright. Thank you, si-… Fa…thanks.” Harry sighed at his own inability to settle on a title for Snape and then excused himself from the table and went to his room.

He dug out a flannel pajama bottom from Hogwarts and one of Dudley’s old shirts. They make for great pajamas. He settled on his bed and then sat at attention when he heard a soft knock.

“Come in!”

Snape entered the room slowly, hands full with phials of potions that he set on Harry’s nightstand.

“These are only precautionary. I don’t think you’ll need all of these,” he said.

“Why do I have to be in bed for this? It’s still light out and everything. It’s not like I’m tired.” Harry half-complained, not really minding as long as it worked and he could see what he really looked like.

“As I said before, this will likely be very draining for you. Many of the counter-spells require interaction with your own magic to repel the glamours. Since these spells have been on you for your whole life, they have bonded with your magic and will be quite difficult to tear away. Also… it is illegal to use magic directly on an infant because it is very dangerous and can be damaging. James used these spells on you just minutes after you were born. There may be complications that we are not aware of as long as the spells remain intact.”

This frightened Harry and little bit and his stomach twisted nervously.

“So I might be hurt by doing this? Would I be better off if I just left it all alone?”

Snape shook his head.

“Just because we can’t see something or you can’t feel it, doesn’t mean there is nothing hurting you. It’s better to get rid of what’s hiding you so that we can see and fix anything that might need fixing. Do you understand?”

“Yes…. I just wish that didn’t make me so nervous.” Harry smiled shakily.

“Well, I am prepared and I’ll be with you the entire time. I won’t begin the counter-spells until you are ready.”

Harry took off his glasses, setting them aside, and took a few breaths. Then he laid down and nodded to Snape.

Snape lifted his wand and began to incant. The effects felt immediate to Harry and he gasped.

“What’s wrong? Do you need me to stop? We don’t have to remove all the spells in one night.” Snape looked so scared that Harry almost laughed.

“No, I’m fine. It just surprised me. It feels like I’m being tugged at from all sides, but it doesn’t hurt. Keep going.” Harry encouraged.

Severus watched his son critically, noting that Harry’s breathing was slightly faster and shallower than before. He almost wanted to stop. He could see no changes yet and he still had several spells left to counter.

“Please…. Keep going.” Harry asked with a small smile. And so Severus continued, watching for any dramatic declines in Harry’s well being as he did.

Twenty minutes later, Severus dropped his want arm to his side. Harry had fallen asleep not long after the third counter-spell, but not before he had pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes and informing Severus that they hurt like when he tried to read without his glasses.

Severus was exhausted also. The counter-spells took a lot of energy to cast. He knew James must have been working on pure adrenaline to put all the spells on Harry and not seem affected at all.

Severus brought the chair he’d used when Harry was sick back over next to the bed and settled in for a night of watching over Harry to make sure no serious complications occurred.

Finally, sometime in the middle of the night, the spells had finally separated from Harry’s magic and Severus could feel a breeze brush passed him and he flinched his eyes shut. Harry’s breath hitched and then stopped and Severus set into motion. He grabbed a light blue potion, The Breath of Life, from the nightstand and gently lifted Harry’s head. He poured the potion slowly and caressed the boy’s throat, making him swallow.

The potion worked instantaneously and Harry gasped and settled into a regular breathing pattern. Severus settled back into the chair with a relieved sigh. With the immediate danger out of the way, Severus took the opportunity to really look upon his son for the first time.

Harry’s hair was still just as wild as before, but a shade darker. The texture he’d obviously inherited from his mother, but it was Severus’s own midnight color. Hid face was a little longer, but he still kept his full lips and Potter nose. Severus could tell that Harry’s eyes were more almond shaped like his own and he couldn’t wait until he saw the color of them when Harry awoke. Harry’s skin color also changed to a more olive tone and it was obviously the color that Severus’s own skin would be if he got out in the sun a little more.

Severus’s gaze followed down Harry’s body and he noticed the loose clothing was even baggier on the small form than it had been before. He’d been hoping, for Harry’s own sake, as he was already quite short, that he would be a little taller like Severus. Unfortunately, it was obvious that Harry’s stunted growth was a combined effect of malnutrition from the Dursleys and from having numerous spells over his body from the moment he was born.

As he ran a hand through Harry’s unruly hair, he couldn’t help but smile. His son was beautiful. A perfect mixture of Severus and Marguerite, and still Harry. He leaned in and kissed Harry’s head, wanting to remember forever the first time he truly laid eyes on his son.

----

Morning came quickly and Severus realized he’d fallen asleep during his bedside vigil. He chuckled to himself as he hoped he wouldn’t need to make a habit of spending his nights there. At least he’d woken up first this time.

He briefly thought of leaving to freshen up, but he promised Harry’d he’d be there and he wanted to be around when Harry woke up and finally saw his true self.

He didn’t need to wait very long for as he was stretching to crack his back, Harry began to stir. Severus stilled until he saw Harry’s eyes flutter open. Deep and dark eyes of brown with darker, almost black, flecks looked up at him.

“Did it work?” Harry asked, his voice distorted by a half concealed yawn. Severus nodded and then jumped back as Harry hopped out of bed excitedly. There was a small yelp as Harry tripped over his pant legs. Harry glanced at his feet with a frown.

“I’m shorter!”

“Yes… I did tell you there might be side effects from having the spells on you for your whole life. The spells interfered slightly with your growth.”

“Bugger,” Harry muttered, picking himself back up.

“It’s beneficial that the spells were removed now. You still have growing years left. You won’t be this size forever.” Severus smirked. He motioned for Harry to continue to the bathroom so he could look in the mirror. When Harry paused, Severus put a hand on his shoulder.

“Close your eyes.” He gently guided Harry into the bathroom and stood him in front of the mirror.

“Alright. Open.”

Harry took a deep breath and let it out slowly before he opened his eyes.

Harry’s mouth fell open and he reached up to his eyes. Then he grabbed a tuft of hair and examined it closely. He ran both hands down the sides of his face, feeling the slightly different bone structure that made it longer.

When Severus noticed a tear falling down Harry’s face, he flinched.

“Are you quite alright? I realized my genes aren’t the best looking ones to inherit, but-”

“It’s great. I’m great.” Harry sniffled, looking up at the reflection of Severus standing behind him.

“Pardon?”

“I’m still… it’s still me, but better. I mean… it looks like I’m supposed to look this way.”

“You are, child.”

“I know! Isn’t it great? I’m myself now instead of just being a copy that reminds people of someone else.” Harry grinned. Severus’s smile dropped despite his happiness for Harry.

“Is that how you saw yourself before?” His serious tone caused Harry to stop marveling at the mirror and turn away as if ashamed.

“Well yeah… nobody ever let me forget that I was the spitting image of my- of James Potter. Everyone expected me to be just like him. If I did anything good, it was him that everybody praised… ‘must’ve gotten it from James’… but if I ever did anything wrong, it was all ‘I don’t know where that boy gets it.’. He was so bloody perfect and I couldn’t measure up and everybody constantly reminded me of that. I hated looking like him.” Harry scowled, looking more like Severus with his narrowed almond shaped eyes.

“You’ve really been so disquieted with your own appearance?” Severus asked, hear breaking as he listened to his child’s lament.

“It never felt… right.” Harry shrugged, turning back to the mirror again and waving at it. “This does.”

He turned back again and walked back to the bedroom, glancing back once more into the mirror and grinning. Severus followed and then swept passed to pick up all the potions that were still sitting on the nightstand.

“What was in that one?” Harry pointed to the one empty phial.

“Breath of Life. You stopped breathing when the spells finally broke. Your body needed that bit of help to adjust. I imagine your body and magic had grown accustomed to the constant presence of the spells and incorporated them and used the magic. Your body may still need time to adjust… I will be keeping an eye on you and I expect you to inform me of any changes you feel, good or bad.”

“Yes, sir.” Harry’s eyes were wide as he brought a hand to his throat, still thinking on the fact that he’d stopped breathing.

“Mmm…” Severus nodded absently, shoving the phials in the numerous pockets of his robe. “Come down to the lab as soon as you dress. I’d like to examine you before breakfast.”

He left his son and went to prepare for an examination in the potions lab.