“This smells bad” hissed the snake wrapped around Harry’s wrist in what was probably the understatement of the century. He had found the friendly little snake when visiting Hagrid earlier that week and had grown quite attached to it. Now he was very pleased to have a friend to share Snape’s evil detentions with.

“You’re telling me” he hissed back, the parseltongue echoing oddly in the huge cauldron he currently had his head in while scrubbing it. “I honestly can’t imagine what he does to these.”

“You probably don’t want to” the snake returned. Harry couldn’t help but grin. Who knew snakes had a sense of humour.

“I suppose.” Harry conceded. “Why don’t you sit on my ankle? That way you won’t need your head in here.”

“Good thinking. Will do.” Agreed the snake, slithering down his body. “Ahh, air glorious air” the snake sighed dramatically. Harry laughed out loud.

“Something amusing you Potter?” Sneered Snape from behind his desk.

“No sir” Harry replied, probably a little too cheerfully for a boy with his head in a filthy cauldron.

“I don’t believe you” Snape informed him nastily “Five points from Gryffindor.” Harry sighed and returned to his work, informing his friend of the development.

“Stupid man” hissed the snake “If he hadn’t let that boy drop things in your potion it wouldn’t have exploded. You should enjoy yourself.” Harry grinned. He loved this snake. He didn’t know why he’d assumed that their intelligence would be limited but it certainly wasn’t. And best of all this one had a Gryffindor sense of fairness. Take that Slytherin. Seeming to echo his thoughts the snake commented “And his house is represented by snakes. No wonder no one likes us” Harry snorted, again gaining the attention of the potions master.

“Potter, whatever it is that you are…” he stopped abruptly as and explosion sounded above them. Almost instantly rubble began falling from the ceiling at an alarming rate. Harry crouched under the desk for protection.

“What in Merlin’s name is happening?” he murmured, although no one heard it over the din. The rubble was falling thick and fast around the classroom, and it appeared that the thick stone ceiling and most likely some walls from both the dungeon and the floor above collapsed around them. Eventually the deafening noise subsided to the occasional smash overhead. Harry uncoiled himself from his protective ball and attempted to assess his situation. The desk had somehow managed to survive the collapse, magic Harry supposed, though why the walls and ceiling did not share it was anyone’s guess. The collapse had trapped him under the desk, with rubble to either side of him. He tried to move some and found it a waste of time, both manually and magically. It seemed to be an example of the well documented occurrence of the magic in a building being compressed so that no other spells could work. It was then that he noticed he sounds of ragged breathing and scrabbling from the other end of the desk. He hadn’t realised that Snape had taken shelter under the same desk as him, but he supposed hiding under a desk filled with potions would not have been intelligent.

“Professor? Are you alright?” Harry asked, slightly concerned by his teacher’s behaviour. The man didn’t respond but continued with the futile task of scrabbling against the rubble. “Sir!” he called loudly, but the teacher didn’t respond. “You’re claustrophobic” Harry murmured in sudden realisation. “Who would you least like to be trapped in a lift with” he muttered to himself. For a moment he considered possible uses for this information, the mental list being topped with the word ‘revenge’ in foot high blood red block capital letters. As soon as the thought entered his head however he became ashamed of himself. His teacher was in the midst of a panic attack and all he could think of was uses for the information. Sighing in resignation he scooted along the ground to where his teacher was kneeling. He tentatively put a hand on his shoulder, which was wholly unsuccessful as the man just shrugged it off. Coming to what could be a very dangerous decision for him he took both shoulders and roughly span his teacher around to face him. “Stop that” he commanded harshly, hoping that he was right in his assessment that his teacher wouldn’t want sympathy.

“Get off of me Potter.” He cried hysterically. Harry grabbed his shoulders again and shook them.

“Concentrate on me!” Harry demanded. “Concentrate on my voice, don’t think about anything else. Just think about me. How much you hate me. Concentrate. Don’t think about anything else. Think about how awful I am. How many detentions you’re going to give me for this once we get out. How many points you’ll take. What nasty things you could put in you cauldrons before I have to clean them. How much you hate Gryffindors.” He continued on this rapid fire distraction until his teacher’s breathing was slightly more even, and then trailed off, trying to figure out how to distract the man from their situation. “Do you like snakes?” he asked in sudden inspiration.

“I suppose so” Snape mumbled shakily, seeming suspicious of the change in topics. Harry smiled and coaxed his snake onto his hand.

“Don’t hurt him Ok?” he asked the snake. “He doesn’t like small spaces”

“I don’t like smelly cauldrons” retorted the snake sulkily. Harry raised an eyebrow “Fine” it acquiesced. Harry stroked it.

“Just let him hold onto you for a bit ok? It might distract him.” He passed the snake over to his teacher. The man let the snake slither through his fingers for a few moments silently, focusing on the small serpent. Sufficiently distracted he spoke, skill watching the snake.

“A very Slytherin pet for the golden Gryffindor. I thought you had an owl.”

“He’s new” Harry admitted. “And he seemed like a perfect pet for a parselmouth. I mean I could have gone down Salazar’s route and found myself a basilisk but that seemed a little unnecessary.”

“Hmm” was all the response he got.

“Maybe once we get out of here you could salvage ingredients from the chamber.” The man nodded.

“What happened?” he asked after a while.

“I don’t have a clue” Harry admitted. “Something somewhere between Crabbe and Goyle on a trampoline and giants with pneumatic drills I’d imagine” to his amazement his teacher actually laughed

“Those are my students you are speaking about Potter” he scolded lightly. Harry grinned.

“I mean no disrespect to them sir. I was merely speculating that they may have embarked on an exercise regime.”

“Yes, that is why you suggested that the event would cause the school to collapse.”

“I would never make comments about a fellow student’s size” Harry retorted in mock outrage “I could just as easily have suggested Ron and Mione. If your thoughts immediately go to their size however …”

“Very clever Potter” Snape muttered “I see that Albus wasn’t lying when he told me that you were nearly in my house.”

“Gossiping old man” Harry muttered under his breath.

“Dear me. Disrespecting the headmaster” Harry just raised an eyebrow.

“As if I’d do something like that” he retorted “I could have meant anyone. But if your thoughts fly to the headmaster…”

“We’ve done that one Potter” Snape informed him

“Well we wouldn’t have if you weren’t so disrespectful” Harry retorted, while contemplating how odd it was that he was bantering with Snape to keep his mind off of his fears. “I could send my little friend out to see what’s happening. He should be able to fit through the rubble” Snape nodded and regretfully relinquished the snake.

“Can you try to find out what’s going on out there for us please?” the snake agreed and slithered through a gap in the rubble.

“What is it like to be able to talk to Snakes?” Snape asked after a while.

“It’s no different from talking to people.” Harry admitted. “It sounds like English to me. That little one has a wicked sense of humour. The basilisk was a bit dense.”

“Odd. I never imagined that they could hold a conversation”

“Me neither” Harry admitted “but this one can. He doesn’t think much of you biased behaviour.”

“You’re joking” Snape muttered “only you could find a Gryffindor snake”

“Why thank you sir” Harry retorted. They lapsed into silence for quite some time.

“I don’t suppose you know what time it is?” Snape asked quietly. Harry glanced at his watch.

“Quarter to eleven” Harry replied with a sigh. “I can’t hear anyone out there so it looks like we’re staying the night.” The effect of the simple statement was instantaneous and Harry cursed himself for his stupidity. Snape once again began clawing at the rubble like a wild animal, sobbing hysterically having been reminded of their situation it seemed. Deciding to try a different approach this time Harry again span him around. “Focus on my voice. Close your eyes. Imagine you are on a beach. You can feel the sand between your toes, you can taste the salt and you can hear the waves.” He paused and was gratified to find that his cupboard trick was calming his teacher down. “You look around and you see no sign of anyone else anywhere. This is your space. There are cliffs behind you, the sea is in front of you and the beach extends as far as the eye can see. You sit down in the sand and lay back. You feel the sand between your fingers and the sun is beating down on you. You feel the heat on your skin, hot without burning you. After a while you get up and shake to get the sand off of you. You go to the sea and dip your feet in. Its cold but it feels good on your feet. You wade in further and paddle, watching tiny fish frolic in the water.” He continued his relaxation technique. After about ten minutes Harry suspected that his teacher had fallen asleep from the steady breathing coming from the other side of the desk. Deciding that he probably wouldn’t get a better opportunity he curled up and fell asleep almost instantly.

Harry awoke to something flicking around his nose. He scrubbed at his eyes.

“Wakey wakey” hissed his snake.

“Oh good. You’re back” Harry hissed quietly, trying not to wake his teacher “What happened?”

“There is a lot of rubble around here, but the Slytherins can still get by. I don’t think anyone realises that anyone was in here. No one is moving anything but a few people are looking at it” Harry scratched his head.

“I can’t think of any way to contact them” he admitted. “I can’t imagine Voldemort will translate for you in order to rescue me. They’ll figure it out in the morning; we’ll be fine now that sleeping beauty is out of it” The snake made a sound that sounded vaguely like a laugh.

“Very well. I’ll stay here with you then” Harry smiled and held out his hand, which the little snake wrapped around. He glanced at his watch and saw that is was three in the morning. Yawning he rolled over and fell asleep.

The next time he awoke it was to a half stifled cry of pain. Dragged roughly to the land of the living by another he sat up and glanced at his watch. Four in the morning, he noticed. Snape sucked in a harsh breath and cried out again.

“What’s wrong?” Harry asked sleepily as he pulled himself into a sitting position. From the dull green glow of his watch light he could see that Snape was curled into a ball, which didn’t seem to explain anything. In the quiet which was only penetrated by his teachers breathing he heard a quiet voice chanting

“Call, hurt, pain burn, call, hurt, pain, burn”. Leaving that for a moment he turned to Snape.

“What is it?” asked then suddenly he realised “He’s calling isn’t he?” he sensed rather than saw a nod. “Let me see your mark.” When Snape did not comply he gently pulled the arm towards himself. He held his watch under his chin to focus its dull light on the red burning mark. He ran a finger over it and felt the man stiffen. “Sorry. Did that hurt it?” Harry asked

“Yes Potter” Snape sneered angrily “It felt like it does when the bloody dark lord touches it.”

“Hmm, I wonder” Harry murmured. Putting his ear to the arm he heard the chanting more loudly.

“Stop that” he commanded “Stop hurting him”

“You are not my master!” The snake retorted angrily

“No? I certainly share his blood” Harry informed the tattoo.

“Prove it” the snake hissed doubtfully. After a moment of contemplation Harry bit down on his thumb, making it bleed then smeared the blood over the snake on the mark. Snape screamed loudly but Harry’s attention was focussed entirely on the snake.

“Curious. You are indeed related to the one who created me. What would you have me do master?” Harry tilted his head to one side in thought.

“What are you?”

“I am the direct link to my creator.” The little ink snake told him, while the man still writhed in pain.

“You say the. Is there not one of you on each mark?”

“No master. I am the snake on every mark.” Harry nodded slowly

“So if I were to ask you to stop torturing this man”

“I would do it master”

“And if I told you to hurt the others as severely as possible”

“I would kill them master,” Harry was grinning broadly now

“You can do that? What if I told you to attack your creator?”

“I could not do that master” The snake admitted “The link is two way but I am unable to attack my creator.” Harry nodded slowly.

“In that case if I was to attack through the link I could hurt him.”

“Yes master” Harry smirked

“Sorry about this sir” he muttered in English before returning to the mark. “I command you to kill everyone connected to you but this man.” Harry closed his eyes and held his injured thumb to the snake, connecting himself to Voldemort. His scar burned fiercely as he concentrated hard on the feelings of love that he felt sure would cause harm to the snaky moron. He vaguely heard a scream and then silence before he passed out.

“Potter! Potter!” Called a voice desperately. Harry blearily opened an eye only to see pitch blackness. He fumbled around and found his watch. He turned on the light then blinked stupidly.

“Alright sir?” he asked vaguely, his head and thumb throbbing slightly. He pulled himself into a sitting position. He saw his teacher clutching his legs to his chest and shaking violently. “What’s wrong?” he asked, concerned now. “Is it the mark?” When the teacher didn’t respond Harry tentatively put a hand on his teachers shoulder. Every time he did it he couldn’t help but think that he’d be safer offering it to the Hungarian Horntail. This time however his eyes widened almost beyond capacity when the professor threw his arms around him as if to convince himself that Harry was really there. Once Harry had recovered the power of speech Harry tried again

“What’s wrong?”

“Alone” Snape mumbled, clearly in the midst of another panic attack.

“I was out cold and you were alone in the small space” Harry realised out loud. “Sorry. Can I see your arm?” The man held out his arm warily. Harry took it and gasped. “It’s gone sir” Harry announced quietly. That seemed to snap his teacher out of his panic attack as he stared at his now bare arm.

“You…what? How?” he asked hoarsely.

“It believed I’m its master, because of the blood I share with Voldemort now. I figure I managed to hurt the ridiculous monster as well.”

“I … well … uh” Harry laughed

“Awkward topic huh? Don’t worry about it. Let’s talk about something else.”

“Alright” Snape agreed quietly “Your relaxation techniques. How did you know to use them?”

“When I was growing up my relatives were never kind to me and they would shut me in a cupboard, which was where I slept. When I was upset or frightened I knew I wouldn’t get any sympathy from them so I had to cope by myself. That technique turned out to be the most effective. Did it work ok?”

“Yes” admitted Snape “I never imagined that I would be able to sleep in this horrible little space. Thank you”

“You’re welcome. Anyway, according to my super spy it’s only a small part of the school that’s caved in. I don’t think anyone realises that we’re trapped.” Noticing the terror that had overtaken his companion he put an arm around his shoulders “but they will do in a couple of hours once we don’t show up for class. You’ve managed well so far” Snape nodded slightly.

“Can I hold him again?” he asked.

“Sure,” Harry smiled, uncoiling the snake and passing it to his teacher. He listened for a moment then laughed and hissed something.

“What’s he saying?” Snape asked, eyeing the snake uneasily.

“He said that your hands are cold” Harry informed him dryly. “Fussy creature really.”

A few hours later they heard urgent voices through the piles of rubble.

“We’re over here” Harry called loudly.

“Is Professor Snape with you Mr Potter?” called a voice Harry recognised as McGonagall.

“Yes mam” he called back.

“Is he alright?” Harry nudged Snape

“I’m fine Minerva” he called while glaring at Harry playfully.

“Thank goodness” he heard “We’ll be there in a minute.” The rubble shifted loudly around them for a few minutes.

“Harry!” squealed a voice Harry instantly recognised as Hermione as soon as enough rubble was moved for them to escape.

“Hey Mione” Harry replied, blinking in the sudden light. He put his hand back under the desk and gave Snape a hand out. “We did it.” He told his teacher “I told you we would” Snape nodded and put an arm around Harry’s shoulders. Hermione, Ron, Dumbledore, McGonagall, Sprout and Flitwick all watched the exchange with surprise and looked ready to pass out when Snape put an arm around Harry’s shoulders. The pair grinned at their rescuers.

“Took them long enough didn’t it?” Harry commented to Snape with a grin.

“Indeed. Anyone would have thought they didn’t want us back” Snape returned, then shocking everyone but Harry he started to laugh at the gob smacked expressions on everyone’s faces.

“Erm, what?” asked Ron. Harry laughed as well.

“Don’t worry Ron. Your tiny brain wouldn’t be able to cope with it.” Harry informed him.

“There were some terrible events last night” Dumbledore stated gravely. “Several students died most suddenly, all of them marked death eaters. We were rather concerned that you would also be affected. I don’t suppose you have any ideas why.”

“I might have a few” he commented giving Harry a meaningful glance.

“Oh that’s good sir. We wouldn’t want it to remain a mystery would we?” Harry retorted glibly earning himself a swat around the head.

“Severus!” exclaimed McGonagall “You can’t hit a student!”

“Yeah” Harry mimicked “You can’t hit a student!” Ron and Hermione were staring at Harry in abject horror.

“What are you doing Harry?” hissed Hermione

“Nothing” Harry replied innocently “Sir” he addressed Dumbledore “I think you’ll find that the world is a far nicer place today than it was yesterday”

“I don’t suppose you’d explain that would you Harry?” he asked. Harry was about to inform him that he wouldn’t but another swat from Snape made him reconsider.

“Well. I’m fairly sure that no one in here was particularly fond of old Voldemort were they?” He grinned impishly at the staff who stared at him in shock. “Maybe I was wrong” he muttered to Snape.

“What did you say?” asked Dumbledore once he recovered his voice

“Oh dear. Going deaf won’t help our gossiping capabilities” Harry muttered to Snape who covered his mouth to hide is smile.

“Alright. I’ll ask” Announced McGonagall, sounding annoyed. “What happened while you were hiding under that table” Harry wiggled his eyebrows and Snape winked in their pre-arranged routine. Immediately McGonagall and most of the other staff were shouting for Snape to be fired and Hermione and Ron were torn between finding Harry mental help and killing Snape. Unable to take any more Harry collapsed into giggles.

“Really Mr Potter. What is so funny?” asked Dumbledore.

“Oh dear. He’s using the surname” Harry murmured making Snape laugh.

“This is serious!” exclaimed McGonagall. Harry looked around the classroom excitedly

“Really? Where?” The joke went right over the heads of most of those present; however Hermione, Ron and Dumbledore understood and didn’t seem too amused.

“Harry. I think you need to tell us what happened last night my boy” Dumbledore suggested quietly.

“Oh you care now” Harry cried “But no one cared enough to rescue me before I had to spend a whole night trapped under a table in pitch blackness with a known death eater with no means of escape and no way to protect myself.” He was personally quite pleased with the tears running down his face.

“How dare you?” roared Snape in practiced anger “You had better start running boy because …”

“Severus!” screeched several teachers causing Harry to double over laughing while Snape visibly fought to keep a straight face.

“Would someone please tell me what happened last night?” asked the headmaster in exasperation.

“We were trapped under a table. I slept. He slept. You let us out from under said table” Harry recited blandly. Snape elbowed him. “Oh yeah, and that annoying little interlude with the dark mark”

“The interlude with the dark mark?” asked Dumbledore carefully

“Correct!” Harry cried happily.

“Harry. Could you please be slightly more helpful” Snape whispered something to Harry making him stick his tongue out at the man before dancing around to his other side.

“Well go on sir” Harry wined. “Show them your nasty old arm” Snape glared but rolled up his sleeve to reveal blood covered skin.

“Who’s blood?” Hermione asked carefully.

“That would be mine” Harry announced happily as though there was nothing unusual about that admission. “Oh you’re so slow” he sighed dramatically before dancing to a sink and wetting a cloth. He returned to the potions master and cleaned off his blood. “There you go. No more blood. Happy?” he asked cheekily, throwing the cloth behind him.

“Where is the mark?” asked Dumbledore slowly.

“Well there’s a freckle right there” Harry pointed out helpfully.

“As much as I regret to say it your boy wonder would be the only one who could answer that. I was a little preoccupied trying not to pass out from the pain. Not a concern Potter had” Snape informed them with a glare at Harry.

“Oh play nice.” Harry scolded “You couldn’t have known what was going on even if you were watching and taking notes. I was talking in parseltongue.”

“Oh very well, I’ll forgive you”

“How generous of you”

“Brat!”

“Greasy git!”

“Gentlemen” called Dumbledore, “Can we please get back to the topic in hand?”

“Aww, do we have to?” Harry wined. Snape took another swat at him but Harry ducked. “Fine, fine. I used my blood to convince it that I was its master.”

“What?” asked Dumbledore

“The snake part of the mark” Harry answered casually “I told it to finish off everyone with the mark but Snape then I used Snape’s mark to attack Voldemort. Voila, no more death nibblers and from the feel of my head I don’t think much of old Tommy’s chances either.” That left more than a few people with their mouths open. Just then Colin Creevey bombed into the classroom. After giving Snape and Harry an odd look he turned to the headmaster.

“Sir. The prophet says that the wards around you-know-who’s hideout fell last night and the aurors found him and his followers dead. Is it true?”

“I’m afraid the only one who could answer that would be Mr Potter.”

“Did you kill them Harry?”

“Yup”

“Brilliant. Nice one.” He called as he ran back out to rejoin his friends.

“Uh, explanation?” asked the dumbfounded headmaster.

“Well I forced Riddle to sit through a sickeningly sweet stream of emotions that can only be equalled by children’s television. If I’m not mistaken the link acted as an amplifier, and the emotions worked a lot like my hands on Quirrel. Hot hot burny burny and all that then no more Tommy” He grinned. “I tried to use small words” he lamented when everyone stared at him.

“Obviously not small enough from the looks on their faces. Maybe you should have avoided the muggle references. That’s probably what did it.”

“Enough” shouted Hermione surprising everyone. “Harry. Are you trying to tell us that you defeated Voldemort using positive emotions that you forced through the dark mark”

“Absolutely” he replied with a grin. H elbowed Snape. “She’s smarter than you. She got it far quicker.”

“What on earth happened between the two of you last night?” asked McGonagall. Snape stiffened beside Harry, who rolled his eyes and grinned.

“I’m afraid I can’t tell you that ma’am. Needless to say we got to understand each other better.” She grumbled something under her breath.

“Potter. You are an enigma.” Snape stated once the others had left the classroom.

“Why thank you sir” Harry retorted, perched on top of a desk.

“I mean it”

“I know. How many people can survive a killing curse at age one?” he asked, turning around and dangling upside down from it.

“You know what I mean” Snape sighed in exasperation. Harry laughed

“Yeah, I suppose I am. What cha going to do about it?”