They ended up retreating to the dormitory and casting a Silencing spell on the door. Hermione was still extremely huffy about deliberately skipping classes but her attitude changed radically the moment he let her know about Remus.

“Professor Lupin is here?” she hissed incredulously.

“Pretending to be Snape?” Ron added, a chocolate frog dropping out of his nerveless fingers. “Why?”

Harry blew out a breath. “Told you you’d want to know about this right away. Now, Snape told me he was being called away on a mission for Dumbledore at the beginning of October, but something happened to make him leave now instead. I’m hoping the answer lies in this letter.” He produced the parchment bearing the Prince seal and handed it to them. “It’s from him to me. Hopefully it’ll explain everything. If not, well...” He shrugged, wondering if he really dared open the letter to find out what its contents were.

Ron accepted the parchment from Hermione and squinted at the seal before handing it back. “Why not open it now?” he asked.

“Well, uh.” Harry glanced down and peaked up from under his fringe. “I kinda wanted to read it alone first, but I promise you can read it right after.”

Hermione reached out and patted his hand. “It’s alright, Harry. It’s your personal letter and you don’t even have to talk about anything that’s inside it, let alone show it to us.”

Harry smiled while Ron flushed. “Sorry,” he muttered, his ears now the same colour as his hair. “Shoulda thought of that – sorry.”

Harry grinned at him and punched his arm. “S’OK, Ron. I know I can tell you guys anything, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Ron grinned back and returned the punch. His was slightly stronger than Harry’s, but Harry was surprised and pleased to note his taller body could withstand it much easier than it used to – another thing to thank Snape for.

“And, uh.” Harry stopped, swallowing hard and staring fixedly at the bedcovers. This was so difficult already and he hadn’t even said anything yet. “There’s something else I have to tell you,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, and he knew he had captured his friends full attention – even Ron had stopped fidgeting. “About this summer.”

Hermione shifted closer and laid a hand on his arm but didn’t say anything.

“I, uh...” He pulled his arm out from underneath her hand, giving her an apologetic smile as he did so, because he had to do this alone. The thing that had been pressing on him since the summer, the thing he had tried to bury but that he had sometimes wanted to scream at the top of his lungs, was finally coming to the surface. “This summer, I...” his voice still didn’t rise above that same, low whisper as he confessed his greatest secret, “I got to know someone. And care for them. And that person... they... they died.”

There, it was out. Finally. He’d told someone. And it hurt, oh it hurt, but it felt the tiniest bit better as well because he wasn’t as alone as he had been. His cheeks were wet and he came to realise that he was crying – bitter tears, relieved tears, he didn’t know the difference – and he tried to turn away, ashamed that he couldn’t control himself.

His friends wouldn’t let him. They both shifted closer and wrapped him up in a hug that felt like it was the only thing holding him together.

They sat in silence for five minutes, letting Harry’s tears dry, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally Hermione whispered, “Oh, Harry, I’m so sorry,” in a low, shaky voice and the spell was broken.

Harry sniffed and scrubbed his face as his friends backed up a little to give him some breathing room. “S’OK. I feel better now I’ve told you. Don’t know why I didn’t straight away.” He glanced up to see that Ron’s face was unusually solemn and Hermione looked a bit weepy.

“It was still too raw. You needed time to adjust,” she said softly. “But I am glad you’ve told us.”

Harry smiled weakly and reached out to squeeze her hand. “Are you good at everything, Hermione? Hang about, would you? Us blokes need to catch up sometime.”

The weak joke seemed to lighten the mood and Harry found himself able to breathe easier. True, he was still feeling very fragile, but how he felt overall was mostly, Oh, was that it?

Salem hissed and twisted tighter around his left wrist in comfort – which was now officially his favourite place to hide these days. Harry strongly suspected it was because he liked to poke his head out every now and again and scare people. “Humansss! You always make things more complicated than they need to be. For a sssserpent, it’s simple – you eat it, or it eatsss you.”

Harry let out a surprised, hissing laugh. “Thankssss, Salem.” He let the little snake slide down his arm and run over and through his hands, smiling as the iridescent scales tickled his skin. Salem had grown a great deal very quickly. Originally, Harry had been able to fit the entire snake in one cupped palm, but now Salem could coil around his forearm three times and still be able to flicker his tongue at Harry’s fingers. Luckily the books said the Ophidian wouldn’t grow much more – possibly only a couple of inches – so Harry wouldn’t have to worry about where to keep him.

Harry eventually let Salem slip away to look for food. He always found it very strange that both his familiars only seemed to need affection from him and a warm place to sleep at night. They were both very independent.

Like me, I suppose, Harry mused. But I don’t need to be anymore. I have Snape, and Remus, and Sirius. And Ron and Hermione. I’m very lucky. More lucky than I ever thought I’d be before I learned that magic really existed.

Smiling a little, Harry glanced back up at both of his friends who were currently – no surprise – bickering about something. “Hey,” he said softly. “Would you like to hear about my friend?”

That shut them up quickly.

Hermione leant forward, looking concerned. “Of course we’d love to,” she said while Ron nodded seriously in the background.

Harry drew himself up to his full height. “All right, then.”

And so he told them. Everything. Right from the first moment he’d seen the boy in the mirror, to when he’d named him, to how he aided Harry’s escape from Privet Drive, to all their combined antics in Snape’s Manor, to the very end.

Hermione cried in places, and they all laughed in others. When Harry told them about how the spell Dumbledore had cast had made Shadow forget everything and then made him disappear, both Harry and Hermione had tears in their eyes and even Ron looked a little sad. But, for a moment in the telling, it was almost as if he had made Shadow come to life again by talking about him.

And finally he told them about the spell itself – mainly because he knew Hermione was dying to ask.

“So, let me get this straight,” Ron said, wrinkling his nose. “A wizard created a spell, that wasn’t any use, so he created another spell to make the first spell work and then cast the second spell on some poor unsuspecting boy to prove it worked... and then cast the first spell to release him?”

Harry took a moment to untangle what Ron had just said. “Yup, pretty much.”

Ron scrunched up his face even more before staring at Hermione. “I am so confused.”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “Oh, honestly. Shall I explain it to you in Ron-speak? One spell,” she held up a finger, “changes someone’s appearance so that they look like they have a different father. The second spell,” she held up a finger of her other hand, “changes them back to how they’re meant to look. Only the second spell was created before the first, and that spell was the one Dumbledore cast on Harry over the holidays. Yes?”

Ron folded his arms grumpily. “You don’t have to make it sound like I’m completely retarded.”

“Sometimes that’s the only thing that’ll get through to you,” Hermione muttered darkly as the bell for the end of lessons rang.

“Oi!”

“Guys!” Harry intervened before their fight could escalate. “Lessons are over. How about we go outside and fly a bit?”

Hermione wrinkled her nose. “I don’t like flying and you know it.”

“Why not sit under a tree and read for a bit, then? The weather’s still warm enough and there are hardly any clouds. Besides, I’ll come down and join you when I read my letter, OK?”

He knew she’d caved the second he’d mentioned an activity involving books, but he’d continued persuading for appearance’s sake, just as Hermione had put up some token resistance – she’d already known she would end up reading with the boys practicing stunts close by. It had happened far too many times for it to be a surprise anymore. Besides, it was a good way to spend the remainder of an afternoon, with all of them doing things they loved, and knowing that they could stop any moment and regroup to chat if they felt like it.

And so, the dwindling afternoon light found Harry and Ron high above the castle, yelling and whooping, and Hermione settled happily in the shade of an oak tree. There were other people out and about due to the nice weather but they might as well have belonged to another world.

“Betcha can’t catch me!” Harry shouted at Ron, letting go of the broom with his hands as it fell into a steep dive.

“Betcha I can!” Ron yelled behind him, already in hot pursuit.

They’d almost covered more than half the distance to the ground before Harry spotted something. “Shit! McGonagall! Look out!”

Both of them had to do a sharp turn and dart behind a nearby tower – Ron taking slightly longer than Harry to do so – but they managed to make it in time before McGonagall looked up and spotted them. They stayed there for another moment, panting and laughing at their success at getting away with their stunt. True, the Head of Gryffindor had allowed Harry onto the Quidditch team because of risky flying in his first year, but there was no way she’d condone flying with no hands! (Unless, maybe, there was a snitch involved).

“Phew!” Ron finally exclaimed, swiping some straggly hairs off his face. “That was close! Ready to go again?” He grinned – his expression one that any daredevil would recognise – but Harry reluctantly shook his head.

“We haven’t been down to see Hermione all afternoon. She could be getting lonely.”

Ron snorted. “With al those books? Never!” He paused, looking unusually cautious. “Harry...”

“Yes, Ron?” Harry asked, puzzled as to why his friend suddenly sounded so hesitant.

“You said...” Ron paused before bravely continuing, “You said that you did stunts with Shadow one time. Was he any good?” Ron’s tone was light and unpressing but Harry still had to fight the urge to clam up.

“Yeah,” he finally forced out, trying to keep his tone equally airy, “at some points I even thought he would beat me!”

“Well, then,” Ron laughed, seeming more at ease. “Looks like I have competition to live up to! Race you to Hermione!” he yelled and shot off, leaving Harry laughing in his wake.

Harry’s Firebolt won the race in the end, but it was a close thing.

Unsurprisingly, after they’d arrived, Hermione only glanced up once to irritably mutter, “Oh, it’s you,” before diving right back into her books, causing the boys to laugh a little at her reaction.

“See, told you!” Ron sniggered before nabbing one of the Quidditch magazines Hermione had brought with her and sprawling out on the grass with it a little way away.

Harry smiled at both his friends before retreating around the dark side of the tree to read his letter. It did not contain what he expected.

‘My dear son,’ it read, and Harry had to scrub his eyes and read it again before he could believe his vision wasn’t playing tricks on him.

He went to the next line which also made him blink a little bit once he’d read it, ‘(And, yes, you are dear to me, no matter what I might say or how I may act).

‘Doubtless by the time you read this, I will have already left on my mission with the mutt. (No, before you ask, I am not having a nice time. It is perfectly dreadful).’ Harry chuckled a little as he imagined Snape scowling as he wrote this. ‘I will not lie to you and say that our journey is without risk, but I can also assure you that I have no intention of getting myself killed, or indeed allowing your dear godfather to do the same while playing at being a Gryffindor.

‘I am afraid I am unable to tell you when I will return and I regret that you will not be able to send me owls during this period – as well as vice versa. You must simply have faith in me that I am keeping myself (and the mutt) safe and that I am thinking of you.’ Harry had to stop at this point and swallow back the stupid lump in his chest as he thought of how hard it must have been for Snape to write the letter and expose himself this much.

He read on, and chuckled weakly as he discovered that Snape had already correctly guessed where his thoughts were heading, ‘You may be wondering why I am currently so candid with you. The truth is this – I am a Slytherin and always will be, meaning that I will manipulate every possible situation to the advantage of me and my own. By telling you this now, you might have already assimilated any feelings this letter may have provoked by the time I return, thus leading to no negative repercussions between us. As you may have already noticed, I am not – skilled – in dealing with other people’s emotions. It is my hope that you be able to understand and accept this of me.’

Harry nodded, though he knew Snape couldn’t see him. He had already begun to work that out by himself.

‘And now, you foolish child, I shall berate you as you have no doubt been expecting this whole letter. If you are feeling discomforted other something – not matter how insignificant it may seem – you will come and talk to me. Adults have a perspective children do not, and despite being new to being a father, I am certain that I would be able to find a solution to whatever problems you might currently hold. Write any down that might occur while I’m away and we will discuss them upon my return. Or tell Professor McGonagall, or the Headmaster – they will listen and help you also. Failure to comply with this will earn my displeasure – as both your father and your teacher.’

Harry gulped. OK, OK, point made!

‘Hopefully by now you will have realised that I shall attempt to be there whenever you have need of me – whether as a father or teacher, whichever you have need for at the time – but that you must first ask in order for this to happen.

‘Lastly, I must inform you that the Headmaster has agreed to take upon your wandless magic lessons in my stead. You will go and you will listen to what he has to say, otherwise you might end up with a few more handwriting exercises... Do I make myself clear?’ Harry made a face and nodded, then almost laughed at the letter’s next words. ‘Good boy. Lupin has currently taken over my teaching position and is masquerading as me to conceal my absence. I daresay you are disgustingly thrilled at being able to spend more time with the werewolf. No matter, I suppose it can’t be helped.’

Harry grinned as he imagined his father’s long suffering expression.

‘Both the Headmaster and he seem to think you will be trustworthy and keep their secret from everyone, including Granger and Weasley. I know this to be a ridiculous oversight, but I suppose that if you are convinced of their trustworthiness, you may have my permission to tell them. (I don’t know why I’m wasting my ink – of course you already have).’

Harry tried to look chagrined, but a grin kept breaking through. It was obvious that Snape had gone out of his way to make sure Harry found his letter humorous.

‘And now I must draw this letter to a close, for it is time for me to leave. I would be most gratified if you looked after yourself and remained in one piece during my absence. I suppose if you are good for the time being, I could possibly be persuaded to allow your godfather to visit with you.’

‘Stay safe, Harry – Your Father.

‘P.S. When you have the time, go to my quarters. There is something there I would like you to have.’

There was an untidily scrawled word in between Harry’s name and ‘your’. It took Harry five minutes to work out that the word said ‘love’.

Ignoring the leap in his chest, Harry held the letter tight and leaned back against the tree, desperately trying to blink away his tears even as he smiled. His father did care. He did, he did, he did!

oooOOOooo

Shadow stared at the dark grey barrier in front of him and gulped. It had taken him what seemed like both forever and no time at all to walk to this point and now he was finally here, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be. The dark seemed to have a magnetic pull of its own – trying to reach out and tug his soul into its depths. Unconsciously, Shadow wrapped his magic tight around himself and tried to stand stock still.

The menacing darkness shifted and swirled, leaving Shadow frozen to the spot, eyeing it warily. What now? What next? The pull inside of himself had led him this far, but no further. How long was he meant to wait?

Just as he thought this, a movement before him caught his eye and he gasped in a shocked breath as a figure appeared and walked towards him. A figure whose shape seemed hauntingly familiar...

oooOOOooo

Severus stumbled out of the last ditch he hoped to see in a VERY long time and into the outskirts of London. His clothes were already caked in more mud than he cared to examine and, thanks to the need to perform no magic unless absolutely necessary, it was likely they would stay that way for quite a while.

Black was, thankfully, remaining silent – mostly due to the fact that he had spent the whole journey in dog form – otherwise Severus wasn’t quite sure if he would have been able to refrain from magic long enough to prevent himself from casting an Avada Kedavra. However, shockingly, when silent and not at liberty to insult each other, they made a surprisingly good team.

They had both Apparated to a location ten miles from London sometime around two o’clock, having not known how far out Voldemort’s patrols would go. After all, Voldemort had now made crystal clear that London was his territory these days. It had taken them barely half an hour after arriving to stumble far too close for comfort to one such patrol, and they would have been caught if it hadn’t been for Black’s sensitive nose.

There had been several similar instances – though a couple of them involved Severus yanking Black out of the way of anti-magical creature traps, so he didn’t feel quite as humiliated as he might have been otherwise. They had already been very lucky and it was only the first day. Severus now wasn’t holding out much hope for the successful completion of the mission, despite what he’d written in his letter to Harry what now felt like months ago instead of merely hours...

He forced his mind away from that topic. He needed to remain focused and being distracted by whether or not he thought he’d written the right things in a letter to his son was not the way to go about it.

“Black,” he hissed out of the side of his mouth as he crouched in the shadows beside someone’s dustbin. “Black!”

The big, black dog appeared seemingly out of nowhere and growled a warning, showing more teeth than was strictly necessary. Severus bit back a scathing retort. Neither of them needed that now.

“Keep an eye out for somewhere to rest. We need somewhere to regroup. Let’s go,” he murmured, keeping his sentences as clipped as possible.

The dog watched him out of narrowed eyes before giving a sharp nod and departed, giving Severus a nip as he went, which Severus assumed was a reprimand for talking when it wasn’t strictly necessary. After all, there were certain spells that could track sound... not that Severus really thought they would work properly in London, suburbs or not, but it was the principle of the matter.

After that, Severus was forced to silently follow Black through several people’s back gardens and dark alleys, which was all very well for a dog, but very difficult for a man to do surreptitiously. Still, Black knew London from his last few doggy-visits there and Severus had to bow to his superior knowledge, much as it rankled.

Finally – what felt like half the night later – Black wriggled under someone’s fence and into a gap between the fence and their shed. It was an extremely tight fit for Severus to squirm in there with him, but thankfully there was more space in between the back of the shed, a wall and a large buddleia bush.

Severus stretched out his long legs and sighed in relief. This little excursion had definitely proved what he had originally suspected – he was far too old for jaunts like this.

Black transformed and sat opposite him, cross-legged and glaring.

Severus rolled his eyes and glared back. “What?” he hissed, still careful to keep his voice low.

“You know what!” Black whispered back hotly. “We’re supposed to keep silent at all times unless it’s an emergency!”

“It was an emergency,” Severus grumbled under his breath. “I was hungry.”

Unfortunately, Black heard him and opened his mouth, no doubt to rebuke him further, but Severus luckily managed to tug a sandwich out of his pack and shove it at him before the man could get any further.

“It’s called sarcasm Black, you should try it sometime,” he murmured, tucking into his own sandwich, trying to remember his resolution to be nicer to Black for Harry’s sake. “Besides, a human needs more rests than a dog AND I was carrying both your bag and mine.”

Black subsided with a huff and continued munching. Then, grudgingly, he mumbled, “We can work on fashioning a harness for me so I can wear the bag when I transform. You won’t have to carry it then, which means you’ll have nothing to complain about.”

Severus fought back a reply that went somewhere along the lines of, ‘Oh, and when Death Eaters notice a Grim with a backpack, they will obviously pass that off as normal,’ and instead said, “There is no need for that. I am more than capable of carrying both; besides, you need to keep your agility for the benefit of both of us.”

Black carelessly shrugged up one shoulder and curled his lip. “Fine. Just don’t slow us down.”

Severus closed his eyes and leaned more heavily against the fence, which was thankfully quite sturdy. Biting back hateful remarks was more energy consuming than he thought it would be, and if Black was also doing his best, well... they were in for a long, difficult mission. Besides, the extended, furtive journey they had untaken was starting to get to him.

Black snorted and muttered something into the darkness before raising his voice a tiny bit, “We’ll sleep here for a bit – it’s safe enough for a short bit. I can doze and watch at the same time as a dog.”

The unexpected peace offering startled Severus enough to open his eyes and take in the gaunt, rangy man sprawled across from him, unsure about how exactly to respond.

“Very well,” he conceded eventually. “Wake me in a few hours and we’ll move on.”

Black’s grey eyes glittered nastily. “Oh, I’ll do that. Sleep well, Sni... Snape,” he crooned in the most unsettling manner.

Severus sneered and closed his eyes uneasily. Trying not to imagine the manner in which he would be woken, he allowed himself to drift. His last thought before sleep overtook him was, I hope Harry is all right...