~*~

"I didn't say I would take you with me, did I?" Light Arrow asked calmly.

Harry slightly tilted his head to look at the old man. "Why are you here then?"

Light Arrow eyed Harry closely. "To check and see if you two are all right or if you are in need of anything. I have some water and sleeping bags in the pickup for you two, but this will not be a hiding of undefined length, Harry!"

Harry sadly shook his head and looked down at his knees again. He knew that he couldn't run away from what awaited him in the camp forever. Draco needed to know that he wouldn't leave him, and he needed to apologize to him, but not today; maybe tomorrow.

"Good! Maybe a night out here will help you clear your mind. I will heal the cut now, Harry. It will hurt a bit, but it's more of a sting than real pain. Please don't try to pull your hand back while I heal it, okay?"

Harry nodded. "'Kay."

After Light Arrow had healed Harry's hand, he patted his shoulder and stood up. "We will see you tomorrow in the camp, I hope."

Harry looked up at the old man and nodded sadly. "Ehm... Light Arrow..." Harry didn't know how to ask what he so very much needed to know.

"He is okay, Harry. You scared him a lot, but Severus and Rose calmed him down. He is very worried about you. Can I tell him that you are okay and will come back tomorrow?" Light Arrow asked hopefully.

Harry nodded. "Tomorrow."

~*~

"What happened between you and Draco?" Black Hawk asked casually while he and Harry gathered more wood for their campfire.

I knew he would ask me this, Harry thought, annoyed. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay," Black Hawk said dryly as he lifted another big branch off the ground.

"Okay?" Harry asked, puzzled.

"Yes, okay. If you don't want to talk about it, I can't force you, right?" Black Hawk looked around. "I think we have enough wood for the night. Let's go back." With that said, he passed the puzzled looking teen.

There was an uncomfortable silence between the two when they were back at their campfire. Harry felt as if he had hurt Black Hawk by not answering his question, although the Native American didn't give any sign of being disappointed or mad about it.

"Your shirt is dry now. Here, you can change." Black Hawk threw Harry's shirt in his direction.

He wants his shirt back. So he is mad with me, Harry thought sadly.

"What's going on in your head right now?" Black Hawk asked when he saw Harry's sad expression.

"Nothing." Harry looked down shyly. How does he always know when I feel bad?

"Yeah, sure. I would prefer that you tell me that you don't want to speak about it than lie to me." Black Hawk's tone wasn't accusatory, but Harry blushed nevertheless.

"Sorry," Harry said and pulled his own shirt over his head. "Thanks for the shirt."

Black Hawk took his own shirt from Harry and put it on. "You're welcome, and I accept your apology. We have sausages for supper, but what do you think about trying to fish? We have fishing lines and hooks in the survival kit and a rod is quickly prepared. So, what do you think?"

"Sure," Harry said, glad that Black Hawk wasn't mad at him.

"Okay, look, I will show you how to make the rod. First we need osier stakes. They have to be flexible or the fish will rip off the hook. Come on!" Black Hawk waved Harry to follow him. Close to the river a few yards away from the camp, they found an osier. "Now, you have to wrap the line on it like this." Harry imitated each of Black Hawk's moves, and in the end he had a fully functional rod.

"Now we need a bait." Black Hawk looked around.

"A worm?" Harry asked. He remembered having seen a documentary about fishing and there they had worms on the hook. They also had a float, and Harry's rod didn't have one, just a little stone shortly above the hook. Harry had no clue how this should work.

"No, we need something like feathers. We will braid a bit of aluminum in it so that it will reflect the sun. That makes the trout bite on it better. We have some of it in the survival kit," Black Hawk said searching the ground for some feathers. "Ah, there we have some. That's enough for both of us, and we have some as reserve as well. So let's go fishing," Black Hawk said cheerfully.

Harry couldn't share Black Hawk's enthusiasm. When he looked at the construction in his hands, he could hardly believe any fish would fall for it. Harry just looked skeptically at Black Hawk and raised an eyebrow when the man looked so confident.

Black Hawk laughed and ruffled Harry's hair. "Severus is much better than both of us together in eyebrow raising."

"If this works, I will eat my hat," Harry said cynically while walking beside Black Hawk.

"You need your hat, Harry, so don't make promises you can't keep. You will be surprised how well this will work. Let's just try it."

Black Hawk was right. After a bit practice, Harry managed to move the bait over the surface of the river like Black Hawk had shown him. Harry almost let his rod fall when he saw the first trout jump after his hook. The first one who really took the hook fell off shortly after. "You need to find the right amount of strength to use so that it stays on the hook. It's a bit tricky, but it works after a bit of practice."

Harry's ambition was triggered when Black Hawk fished his first trout out of the water. "At least I won't have to eat sausages today." Black Hawk grinned at Harry while he brought the trout over to the campfire and killed it.

After three more fish fell off his hook, Harry almost gave up, but he finally pulled a big trout out of the water. "Not bad, Harry." Black Hawk patted Harry's shoulder, and Harry smiled proudly, but didn't take his eyes from the fish. "Now bring it over to the campfire. Be careful so you won't lose it on your way."

When Harry reached the campfire, Black Hawk fumbled for the knife. "Grab him shortly behind the gills. Yes, that's right. Now take the knife and quickly cut his neck."

Harry gulped. Killing a fish? He looked at Black Hawk uncertainly.

"That the circle of life, Harry. You caught him to eat him, so you need to kill him, as fast and painless as possible. When you cut his neck, he will die quickly."

"'Kay," Harry said, wavering. He took the knife from Black Hawk and chopped the whole head off by trying to kill it instantly.

For the next half an hour, Black Hawk showed Harry how to disembowel the fish and how to flavor it. "It's a bit tricky to get yours on the stick because you beheaded it, but I think we will manage nevertheless," Black Hawk said, grinning.

Harry had never seen Black Hawk grin so often. In the camp he was more serious and mysterious. He liked this cheerful side of Black Hawk more.

"Ready," Black Hawk said, satisfied, when he stuck the four osier stacks in the ground. On top of each stick was an impaled trout. Harry's trout looked very small compared to the others, but he blamed the missing head for it. He was very proud that he had caught it himself. Now, after knowing what had to be done after the fish was caught, he knew he would prefer not to fish again, at least not unless he was very, very hungry.

"What do you think about another bath? This time you can use both hands to fight me, not that it will give you any kind of advantage." Black Hawk teased Harry and was already pulling his shirt off.

"Ha, we will see," Harry said and quickly stripped down to his shorts and was earlier in the water than Black Hawk.

They joked around for almost half an hour, and when Black Hawk noticed Harry's lips slowly becoming blue, he said, "Okay, time to get out."

"Oh, no, we still have time before we eat, right? Lets stay a bit longer in the water."

"Your teeth are already chattering. Off you go," Black Hawk said seriously while Harry pouted.

"Ungrateful brat," Black Hawk said and splashed a big fountain at Harry.

"Hey," Harry said while spitting water. "That was unfair." Harry laughed and splashed water at Black Hawk, who slowly came closer. "Hey what are you planning?" Harry asked, laughing, and tried to step backwards while splashing more water at Black Hawk. Suddenly, Black Hawk dived, and Harry looked around frantically for any sign of where the man was under the water. He yelped when Black Hawk broke through the surface directly in front of him and grabbed him around the waist to toss Harry over his shoulder. "What am I planning? To take the brat out of the water, that's what I'm planning to do. And what I plan, I go through with." With that, he carried Harry laughing out of the river. When he sat the boy down on his feet close to the fire, he was relieved that Harry still was smiling.

"This time we have towels." Black Hawk gave Harry one. "The old man thought of everything, even spare underwear for us. I'm sure that was the first thing White Cloud told him to pack into the backpack for us." Black Hawk drew the towel around his hips and changed his underwear. He hung the wet pair over a branch that was still in the sun and then went over to the pickup to clean up.

That gave Harry enough privacy to change himself. He was glad that White Cloud had sent new boxers because the sun was already low and it would have taken much longer to dry his shorts on his body. The cold river water had lowered Harry's temperature, and he snuggled closer to the fire.

"Cold?" Black Hawk asked when he came over to the campfire.

"A bit," Harry said between chattering teeth.

"There is a blanket in the pickup, behind the driver's seat. Go and get it. I will heat the fire."

"Where are you going?" Harry asked, already wrapped in the blanket, when Black Hawk took his knife and walked away.

Black Hawk paused and looked worriedly at Harry. "I just need some branch forks to position our fish over the fire. I will be back in a few minutes. There is nothing dangerous here."

Harry blushed. "That wasn't why I asked. I can help you."

"No, you need to warm up, Harry. I'll be back in a minute, and I will stay in earshot. So if something-"

"I'm okay." Harry drew the blanket tighter around his body. It was stupid to be afraid when Black Hawk was only going to be away for a short time. That morning, he had run away alone, and now he felt uncomfortable being alone for a few minutes.

"Just like I said, I'm in earshot." After a last concerned look at Harry, Black Hawk vanished into the vegetation.

It had felt so good that Black Hawk was there for him the whole day. Just for him. Harry wasn't afraid of being alone; it was just the feeling of loneliness he feared. Again, Harry remembered when Black Hawk had asked him what had happened in Draco's room. It pained him that he hadn't answered Black Hawk right away. The man had been very kind to him the whole day, and Harry had just pushed him away. He didn't even know why. Would it have been so hard to tell him?

The rustling of bushes pulled Harry out of his thoughts, and Black Hawk emerged between them. "Everything all right, Harry?" Black Hawk asked, out of breath. He had run to be back as fast as possible. The distressed expression on Harry's face had made him worry, but they needed the branch forks, and Harry needed to warm up, so he couldn't have taken him with him.

"Everything okay with you?" Harry asked, concerned, seeing Black Hawk so out of breath and worried looking.

"Of course, I was just... I was just in a bit in a hurry. I'm hungry." Black Hawk lied and rammed the forks in the ground and arranged the sticks with the fish on top of them so that the fish would heat quickly, but not burn.

Sure, Harry thought, but felt a warm feeling spread in his chest by knowing that Black Hawk had hurried because of him.

"Ah... time to rest," Black Hawk said while leaning back against the trunk and stretching his legs. He fumbled for his cigarettes and looked disappointed in the almost empty box. He sighed and took one of the last two cigarettes out and lit it.

"Light Arrow doesn't want you to smoke, right?" Harry asked while watching Black Hawk enjoy his cigarette.

"He forbids all kind of drugs in the camp. Even cigarettes and alcohol, but I've smoked since I was twelve. And hey, our ancestors smoked as well. I mean smoking was a kind of sacrifice to the spirits and a way to communicate with them. Okay, I know it's unhealthy, and if I ever catch you smoking, you will be in big trouble, do you hear me?"

"That's not very convincing coming from a man who inhales this smoke as if it is a delicacy," Harry said, shaking his head.

"No, Harry, it's bad. It's unhealthy and addictive. Light Arrow is right to forbid it. If I could, I would give it up," Black Hawk said seriously, but looked at his cigarette as if it were his girlfriend. "I mean if I could choose, I would never have started it, but now it is damn hard to give it up. Here I am, the one taking the easy way. Hiding from Light Arrow is easier than fighting the withdrawal symptoms."

"Hiding? You know that everyone who doesn't smoke can smell you from five feet away and against the wind." Harry grinned at the surprised look Black Hawk had on his face now.

"Really. I always chew gum." Black Hawk smelled at his clothes. "I can't smell anything."

Harry chuckled. "Has he ever caught you?"

"Sure." Black Hawk shuddered. "And it wasn't nice, I can tell you. But that's all I will say about it. Turn your trout, Harry."

"Black Hawk... do you still want to know what happened this morning?" Harry asked insecurely.

"Sure," Black Hawk said, looking interestedly at Harry.

Harry sighed. "Draco and I read a message from Hermione, our friend... best friend. She replied to a letter Draco had written to her. Draco was reading out loud, but suddenly he stopped and tried to hide the letter from me. We've never had secrets before, and I knew that the secret was about me. He had written Hermione that he was worried about me and that I don't want to be here. Hermione had told him to stop worrying and... and that this is stopping him from being happy again." Harry's shoulders slumped forward, and he looked sadly at the ground. All the doubt and the pain was back now. Why had he offered to tell Black Hawk that? Almost the whole day was brilliant. Harry hadn't felt so good and free for a long time, but now all the bad feelings were back at one go.

"What is bothering you more, that he is keeping secrets from you or that Hermione thinks you are preventing Draco from being happy?" Black Hawk asked calmly.

"Both... but maybe more that I'm preventing Draco from being happy." Harry was surprised that he didn't felt like crying again. Surprised, but glad.

"Has Draco said that it is true?"

"True?"

"Yes, all we know yet is that Hermione is worried that Draco can't be happy while you are not accepting the help. So, I ask you if it is true. Did Draco confirm this worry?"

Harry looked at Black Hawk with a puzzled expression. "I didn't ask him."

Black Hawk threw the stump into the fire. "Then you don't even know if it is right and if there is even something to worry about. In my eyes, Draco has made very big progress in the last days, and at least when I saw him with you and Unega around, he seemed to be quite happy. Even if your resistance against the program is affecting Draco, which we don't know at the moment..." Black Hawk said and held up his hand to emphasize the last words. "Draco is the only one who can change his feelings. You cannot change how Draco feels about anything, Harry. You must decide what's best for you, and Draco has to learn to live with it. It's his task to find a way to be happy, not yours. And as for the secret, I think everyone needs a secret or two. I mean, just because I smoke behind Light Arrow's back doesn't mean that I don't love him or that I respect him any less. Draco is a person for himself and you are one. So each of you can have secrets from another. That's natural. It's good that you two have other friends. Sometimes it's better to tell someone other than your best mate what is bothering you."

Harry drew in a sharp breath at the phrase best mate.

"What's wrong, Harry? Did I say something to hurt you?" Black Hawk asked, worried.

"Best mates... that's what Ron always called us." Harry tried to fight back the tears. It was the first time he had spoken about Ron. His chest hurt, and he had the feeling that all the air was sucked out of his lungs.

"Shhh, Harry, come on, breathe with me." Black Hawk sat down beside Harry and laid his arm over Harry's shoulders. "I'm here, Harry. You are okay. Just breathe with me. In... and out... in... and out..."

Slowly Harry calmed down. "Ron is... Ron is..." Harry tried hard to speak between the sobs, but was unsuccessful.

"I know who he is, Harry. Severus told me about what happened. It's okay. You can tell me about him if you want, but you don't have to. Just calm down." Black Hawk drew Harry closer, and Harry rested his head on the man's shoulder.

"Can we talk about something good or funny, please?" Harry asked when he had calmed down.

"Sure. What would you like to talk about?" Black Hawk asked, looking at Harry's tear-strained face when the teen lifted his head from his shoulder.

Harry shrugged his shoulder, but then grinned. It looked odd on his wet and red face, but Black Hawk was glad that Harry could draw himself out of his depression. Never before had Black Hawk taken part of as many and intensive talks as today. Normally it was Light Arrow's part to deal with the emotionally distressed kids and to speak with them about the past. Black Hawk always saw himself better in the part of making them ready for their new life, but today he found a totally new side of himself, and he liked it. He was pulled out of his thoughts by Harry's exclamation. "Maybe about a basket swinging Crying Horse. You planted quite some picture in my head, you know?"

Black Hawk laughed. Ruffling Harry's hair, he stood up. "One day without Mr. Cheerful and you already miss him." On his way back to his trunk, Black Hawk checked the trout and said, "What about eating, Harry? The trout are ready."

"Sounds good to me," Harry said. He felt as if a big stone has been lifted from his chest. He loved that Black Hawk could change from serious into cheerful so quickly. It was relieving. It was as if Harry could decide the pace and Black Hawk just accommodated it. No drilling questions, no hurt looks, no accusations, just accepting Harry's pace of how much he was ready to give away and of how much he was willing to work on.

Harry felt really happy and balanced for the first time after the horrific experiences in the dungeons. Black Hawk had given him a second trout, and they tasted delicious. With a full stomach, Harry leaned back satisfied and relaxed. That is, until he heard the sound of horse hooves coming closer.