“What do you mean? You’re not going to teach me anymore?” Harry asked as he closed the book he had been reading mere moments before.

Severus sat down on the couch beside Harry and sighed resignedly. He had been thinking about this a lot over the past couple of days, but as the subject was broached during dinner that night, Severus could not avoid it any longer. “You see, Harry, after having Cruciatus used on you so many times, nerve damage starts to occur – not just of the body, but of the mind. Voldemort ravished my mind with impractical force as he Legilimized every last ounce of truth out of me that he could. With the amount that I struggled and the important information under lock and key, it’s a wonder I didn’t lose my mind completely. I’m lucky, very lucky, but that does not mean there was no damage done. My mind is simply much too weak to handle trying to delve into yours and teach you how to block more accurately and firmly. It is not without regret that I tell you this.”

Harry frowned but nodded his understanding of Snape’s long-winded speech. “So, I guess I’ll just have to make do with what you’ve taught me so far and practise on my own. I’m getting better, I really am. I just feel better having you there to help me.”

“Well, there is one other person that could help you. Remus has informed me that he’s horrible at Occlumency, so he won’t be able to help, but Draco is a very good Occlumens as well as Legilimens. He was taught from a very young age through a combination of his father’s instruction and my own. If I can persuade him, he would be an excellent replacement for my teaching you,” Severus explained, already dreading the sceptical look that was on Harry’s face.

“Well...I’m not so sure I want Draco to have access to my mind, with all due respect. I know he’s your godson, Sev, but that doesn’t mean I automatically trust him. I’m sorry, I just...I can’t trust him blindly like that. With you, I’ve always had some sort of trust in you, but not with Draco,” Harry felt slightly guilty by saying it, but he couldn’t quash the feelings of mistrust that sprung up at the idea.

Severus sighed as he leaned back against the couch. He knew what Harry’s reaction would have been, yet he still didn’t have any other solution. Harry had been improving drastically before Severus had been detained by the Dark Lord, but he still wasn’t as good as he could be. He wanted to help Harry, but the boy would need to stop being so stubborn. Suddenly, an idea occurred to Severus that just might solve this problem.

“What if I made Draco take a Wizard’s Oath not to discuss what he may or may not see while teaching you? Would that make you feel comfortable enough to have him help you? I know that it’s hard to trust someone you’ve harboured ill feelings for after so long, but it’s not impossible; look at us. I don’t believe Draco is anymore a threat to you than Remus or myself. He can help you, Harry,” Severus implored. This was too important to just let Harry give up that easily.

Harry still had a sceptical expression on his face as he stopped to think about what Snape had said. He didn’t really think Draco would dig for his secrets and run to Voldemort with them, but the years of ill-will towards each other still made him wary of giving access to his mind. If he really thought hard about it, Harry knew that he could already block his mind enough to keep Draco from seeing anything Harry didn’t want him to. Draco would help him strengthen those shields; he really wouldn’t be entering Harry’s mind at all. That thought brought him little comfort, but comfort at least.

“Would he agree to an Oath?” Harry asked grudgingly. He would humour the Potions Master, even though he highly doubted Draco would agree to any of it.

Severus let out a soft sigh of relief as Harry finally seemed to give in. “I’m sure he’ll put up a fight, but I’m very good at persuading people to do what I want.”

Harry snorted derisively as he tossed his book onto the coffee table. “I’m sure you are, but Draco is very good at being a stubborn prat, so good luck.”

Draco glared at Harry as he used his wand to dry his wet hair. He had been taking a shower before walking into the sitting room in time to here Harry’s last statement. “Oh how touching, Potter. Would you like a declaration in return or are my feelings pretty much clear to you?”

“Boys, that’s enough! Draco I need to speak with you about something. Come, join me in the kitchen,” Severus snapped as his patience started to wane already. This would be a long night, he could feel it already.

Draco grimaced as he grudgingly followed his godfather into the kitchen. He guessed that this little chat would have something to do with Severus grilling him with questions about where he’d been for the last month. He vowed to himself to never talk about it and would gladly obliviate the memories completely if he could. As he sat down at the kitchen table across from Snape, he crossed his arms over his chest defensively.

“I’ve already told you; I don’t want to talk about it. I’m here, I’m alive – the rest doesn’t matter anymore.”

Severus pinched the bridge of his nose in a pray for patience as he tried to reel in his already simmering temper. “Draco, as much as we still need to discuss your whereabouts over the last month, that is not what I brought you in here to talk about. Make no mistake, however; we will have that discussion soon and you will answer my questions honestly,” Severus said in a low voice, purposefully dragging out the last word as a warning and a scare tactic. He knew how to strike fear in the hearts of children, especially one he’d helped in raising.

Draco swallowed the lump in his throat, already terrified of how far his godfather was willing to go to get the information he wanted. “Then what exactly do you want?” he asked with a sneer. He usually would be more respectful towards Snape, but he was feeling a bit insecure and indignant after the threat.

Severus glared pointedly at his godson. “Watch your tongue, child. I can still punish you like I did the summer before your fourth year if you’re not careful,” Severus hissed with a sneer of his own. Draco was just feeding him ways to intimidate him; he’d be nice and softened up by the time Severus actually told him what he wanted from him. Such was the way of manipulating people, especially easily frightened Slytherins.

Draco shuddered as he remembered that punishment very clearly. He wasn’t even fourteen yet, and he had opted to spend an entire summer with his godfather to help improve his potions skills. Severus had a few house rules that had to be strictly followed, or there’d be hell to pay. One, no entering his lab without him. Two, no brewing any unauthorized potions, especially without him keeping watch. Three, no underage magic, even if Draco was allowed to use it at the Manor. Simple, really, but Draco had never been one to follow rules.

He’d had a brilliant idea for an experimental potion one day while Severus had gone out to run a few errands. Draco had set about making this potion, using many of Severus’ rare ingredients to create the concoction. After blowing up Severus’ most expensive cauldron and half of the potions lab completely, Draco had broken yet another rule by using his magic to help clear up and hide the mess he had made. When Severus returned home and found Draco in the lab, he took one look at his half destroyed lab, and the wand held shakily in Draco’s hand and promptly blasted a hole through the ceiling in his anger, opting not to blast a hole through Draco instead. Draco had expected a rather fantastic beating after that, but instead, Severus made him rebuild the lab by hand, and pay for the materials and destroyed potions ingredients with his own generous allowance from his parents.

That part was nothing. There had been one really rare ingredient that Draco had destroyed that was near impossible to find and extremely expensive; the venom of an Ituri Rhinoceros Viper. Despite being a Slytherin and proud of it, Draco hated real snakes and was terrified of touching them. Severus had forced him to collect the venom of over twenty-five conjured snakes by hand. He’d been bitten three times and had to take an immediate antidote, otherwise he would have died within seconds. Since then, Draco had been even more terrified of snakes.

Draco had the decency to look sheepish as he squirmed in his chair. Severus always had a way of hitting his nerves and it drove him crazy. “Yes, sir. Sorry.”

Severus nodded once in acceptance before conjuring two cups of tea and some biscuits. “I have a favour to ask you. Before I tell you what it is I require of you, let me remind you of a few very important things. I have not been loyal to the Dark Lord for many long years now, nor will I ever be again. I no longer support his ideas, and I have learned from my mistakes. Your father has been in Azkaban now for nearly three months, and the Dark Lord has no intentions for releasing him. He is being punished for his failure at the Ministry. You mother was murdered under the Dark Lord’s command by your Aunt while he watched. You were meant to be killed as well, but the Dark Lord made the lucky mistake of letting Bellatrix have you as a pet. In the Dark Lord’s eyes, even Purebloods are expendable, as long as it helps him succeed. You are essentially an orphan now, under my care as my legal charge. For all intents and purposes, you are my son now, and I have legal rights over you. I care about you and will do everything in my power to keep you safe in this war.” Severus paused to take a long drink of his tea, fully aware of the emotions flickering across Draco’s pale face.

“Now, what I’m asking of you is as much a favour to me as it is to Harry. The war could very well depend on this.” Severus let it all sink in as he sipped leisurely at his tea. Potions weren’t the only things he was a Master of.

Draco swallowed hard as panic began to rise in his throat. What on Earth could Severus possibly ask of him that was so damn important, and what did it have to do with Potter? Draco had pretty much already agreed to himself to do whatever it was Severus needed, but he needed to know what was to be expected of him before he would agree to do it for Snape.

“What exactly do you need from me, Sev?” Draco asked, trying but failing to sound calm and uncaring.

Severus hid his satisfied smirk behind his tea cup. He knew he’d be able to persuade his godson, even if it was by guilt. “I’ve been teaching Harry Occlumency on and off for two years now and he is almost ready to be classified as proficient. I was hoping to keep tutoring him to strengthen his shields, but I’m just not in any sort of condition to go delving into other’s minds. This is what I need from you Draco; help Harry strengthen his shields since I cannot.”

Draco let out a sigh of relief. The way Severus was building up to it, Draco was convinced that he’d have to cross a burning bridge carrying Potter on his shoulders or something. “That’s it? I bet you want me to teach him Legilimency afterwards, too.”

“No, actually. Harry happens to be a natural Legilimens, so there’s no need to teach him,” said Severus, unfairly baiting the boy but enjoying it nonetheless.

Draco’s jaw dropped as he knocked over his cup of tea. “What?! That’s so unfair! Why does he always get the magical gifts? He’s a Parselmouth, a natural Legilimens, a bloody brilliant Quidditch player, and he’s the most famous Wizard in Britain – ”

“Starting a fan club, are we?” Severus sneered unpleasantly. “Unfair or not, Harry has an incredible ability, but his Occlumency skills could use a bit more work. It is essential that he learns to close his mind. However, he has some qualms about allowing you into his mind unguarded.”

Draco snorted as he cleaned up the spilled tea with his wand and conjured some fresh tea. He snagged a biscuit and nibbled on it a bit. “Oh he lets you into his mind no problem, but he’s wary of letting me in? Maybe he needs his head examined, because as far as I know, you were the spy, not me. The Dark Lord had much easier access to your mind than mine.”

Severus nodded in agreement. Draco was right, Severus was much more susceptible to releasing Harry’s secrets when he was still serving Voldemort, but that was over now. “I am much more skilled at Occlumency than you, Draco. Besides, He no longer has access to my mind, but Harry is another story. I need you to take a Wizard’s Oath to never reveal to anyone the things you may see in Harry’s mind. Will you do that?”

Draco sighed exasperatedly, but nodded resignedly. “I don’t really think I have much choice either way, but I’ll agree to it if it makes the prat feel better.”

Severus let out a frustrated sigh but kept his temper in check. “We should get it done and over with now so that you can begin working with Harry. It is of the utmost importance that he learns quickly and properly, especially before Hogwarts starts up again.”

Draco gave Severus an appraising look as he sipped at his tea. He certainly was making a big deal out of teaching Harry Occlumency. Draco felt like he was definitely missing something. “Why is it so important, Sev? What don’t I know?” he asked, not really expecting an answer – at least not an adequate one.

“That is not my secret to tell, Draco. Let’s just say that there are very valuable things to be obtained from Harry’s mind, and it would be in the best interests of everyone if he learned to keep those things private. You are not opposed to taking the Oath now?” Severus asked as he stood and let his robes cascade dramatically. He didn’t even have to try to look menacing anymore; his robes simply did it for him.

Draco sighed deeply, abandoning his half-nibbled on biscuit. Something occurred to him then as he vaguely wondered what was so damn important in Saint Potter’s head. “Does this Oath work in reverse? What if he slips into my own mind, since he’s a bloody natural Legilimens? I have stuff I’d prefer to keep private as well.”

Severus shrugged as he opened the double hinged door to the kitchen and waited for Draco to follow. “That is up to Harry to decide, so you’ll have to ask him about it. I’m sure he’d be willing to have the same discretion with you as you will have with him,” Severus assured his godson.

Draco rolled his eyes and he preceded his godfather into the sitting room, where he immediately spotted Potter reading a Quidditch magazine with his legs curled up comfortably on the couch. “Don’t underestimate his ability to be a prat, Sev.”

“Trust me, I don’t,” Severus said with a slight smirk as he nodded his head towards Harry to encourage Draco.

Draco grimaced as he gave an exasperated sigh. “Potter,” he waited for Harry to look up at him. “I’ll take a Wizard’s Oath and teach you, but you have to take an Oath as well,” Draco demanded, still half expecting Harry to say no to the Oath.

Harry flipped his magazine closed and threw it onto the coffee table. “Ok, that seems fair enough. Same Oath as the one you’re taking?”

“Yes, no blabbering about things you see in my mind,” Draco said, highly unnerved at just how easy that had been. Stupid too trusting Gryffindor, no wonder the fool needed to learn Occlumency.

Harry nodded in agreement, watching Snape, who was sitting in the arm chair across the room, out of the corner of his eye as he rubbed at his ribs as though he was in pain and trying to hide it. Harry looked back over at Draco, who was looking at him expectantly as though waiting for Harry do something. “Sorry, hold on just a minute.”

Severus looked up as he felt eyes on him and realized Harry was standing over him, his arms crossed and a disapproving look on his face. “Can I help you, Potter?” he asked, his usual snide tone back in place.

“Are you in pain again? You know Remus said to take a pain potion immediately if you’re feeling uncomfortable,” Harry chastised, feeling more like the adult in their odd relationship at the moment.

Severus glared up at the teen with much venom as he moved his hand away from his aching ribs just to spite him. “I know what Lupin said, Potter. If I am in pain, I will do something about it. I’m not an invalid; I don’t need you watching over me like some mother hen. Besides, you’re just a child,” he snapped, feeling more and more annoyed with having so many people around constantly. He was so used to being at Hogwarts this time of year, alone in the dungeons preparing for the next term to begin.

Harry felt himself bristle at Snape’s words, realizing just then that this was still the snarky Potions Master and entertaining the idea that the man had changed was foolish indeed. “You didn’t mind that I was a ‘child’ before when I was helping Lupin heal all of your wounds after Voldemort had at you. Forgive me for trying to help.” Harry turned around and nodded his head towards the kitchen door as a signal to Draco before entering the kitchen himself.

Draco gave his godfather a concerned look before following Harry into the kitchen, leaving the Potions Professor alone in the sitting room with a very sour expression on his face. He sat down in the chair across from Potter, noticing how very pale and pinched the Gryffindor was looking. He felt an alien sense of pity for him that he tried to squash immediately. “Do you know how to do the Oath, Potter, or am I going to have to go face the Dragon and ask him how to do it?”

Harry smirked and shook his head as he pulled his wand out and set it idly on the kitchen table. “I’m already facing the Dragon.” He let Draco’s annoyed expression bring him pleasure before continuing, “And I already know how to do it. The person taking the Oath has to hold out their wand, handle first as a sign of surrender, to the person their taking the Oath for. You have to repeat the Oath’s conditions and then the person accepting the Oath has to touch the tip of their wand to the handle of the taker’s. Get it?”

Draco thought about it for a few seconds before nodding. “So I’d hold out my wand, handle towards you, and say...what, exactly?” Draco asked, not quite sure if there was anything specific he had to say to make the Oath work.

“Hmm...Well, the conditions of both of our Oaths are the same, right? So I was going to say ‘I solemnly swear to an Oath of Silence regarding what I may or may not see in your mind during our Occlumency lessons.’ Sound good?” Harry asked, coming up with that just now, even though he passed it off as being planned out previously.

Draco nodded his agreement as he pulled out Severus’ mother’s wand and fingered it nervously for a second. “You first, just so I can see how to do it once before I try,” Draco insisted as he twirled the unfamiliar wand around.

Harry shrugged as he lifted his wand and held it up, handle out towards Draco. “I solemnly swear to an Oath of Silence regarding what I may or may not see in your mind during our Occlumency lessons.”

Draco lifted his wand and touched the tip of it to Harry’s, feeling a slight sense of relief as both of their wands glowed for a few seconds before fading again. He took a deep breath before turning his wand handle towards Harry and repeating the Oath. As Harry touched his wand tip to Draco’s the glow emanated once more before fading off, making the room seem a bit darker afterwards.

“Right, so we can start now if you’d like. I pretty much know how to do it all, but my shields are still weak to outside penetration, at least when Snape is trying to break through. I keep practising, but he attacks me at random times and always catches me off guard. How do I make sure I can bring up my shields without any warning?”

Draco already knew the answer to that question immediately, but his curiosity was urging him to ask a question if his own, first. “Why is it that you need to learn Occlumency so bad, Potter? If I’m going to teach you, I want to know what I’m protecting you from,” Draco said, making sure he didn’t sound too demanding.

Harry cocked an eyebrow at the Slytherin, finding it hard to believe that Draco had agreed to this without knowing why he needed Occlumency. “Snape didn’t tell you?”

Draco shook his head, feeling annoyed that even Potter had expected Snape to spill the beans to him. “No. I asked, but he told me it’s ‘not my secret to share, Draco,’” he mimicked his godfather’s drawling tone quite easily, as he usually shared the same tone.

Harry frowned, wondering at Snape’s odd behaviour. “Hmm. Well, I’ll tell you, but I want you to keep this to yourself, like it’s part of the Oath, alright? It’s very important that none of the wrong people find out.” He waited for Draco’s nod of agreement before steadying himself to explain.

“When I was a baby and Voldemort attacked me, his failed Killing Curse ‘marked me as his equal’, unwittingly transferring some of his powers to me. When this happened, it formed a sort of link between us, a mental connection of sorts. He had no idea of this connection, as it’s mostly one-way, and never knew I was seeing into his mind in my sleep, feeling his strongest emotions at random times, until last year when he was possessing his pet snake Nagini. She attacked Ron Weasley’s dad, and I was inside the snake’s mind with Voldemort when it happened. My panic, combined with the strange occurrence of being inside Voldemort’s mind when he possessed the snake, made him realize that I was there. Dumbledore doesn’t believe that he realizes just how long I had access to his mind, that the instance with Nagini was the first time, but now that he does know that the connection is there, he’d most definitely use it to his advantage.”

Draco stared at Potter, dumbfounded by what he was hearing. He couldn’t imagine being inside the mind of the Darkest Wizard of their time and shuddered at the mere thought. He’d known from the stories he’d heard over the years, as well as strange rumours from his father’s ‘friends’, that the Dark Lord had taken a special interest in Potter, but he never really knew why, other than the legendary failed Killing Curse sixteen years previous that robbed the Dark Lord of his body, making most everyone believe he was gone for good.

“No wonder you’re a natural Legilimens, then.”

Harry’s brow creased at this seemingly non sequitur thought. “Pardon?”

“Well, it all makes sense, doesn’t it? I’ve always wondered why you seemed to have heightened abilities compared to the rest of us at school. You pick up spells quicker than everyone else, you’re good at Defence and probably Offense as well, you’re a Parselmouth, and you’re really good at Quidditch. It just makes sense now; it is borrowed magical ability combined with your own powers that make you better at everything.”  Draco sounded a bit too gleeful about this discovery than he should have been, but he couldn’t help but feel justified in his jealousy now.

Harry scoffed as he glared lightly at the blonde. “You can stop stroking your wounded ego, Malfoy. Yes, the Parselmouth, learning spells quickly and even the natural Legilimens probably has something to do with the extra powers from Voldemort, but my Quidditch skills did not come from that old snake.”

“How do you know that? He could have – ”

“He didn’t. Tom Riddle didn’t play Quidditch while at Hogwarts, nor any other time. I acquired my Quidditch skills from my father, actually, as well as working on them on my own,” Harry said, clearly offended at the thought of only being good at Quidditch because he had extra magical powers provided by Voldemort.

Draco frowned slightly but didn’t comment on that any further. “So, how could the Dark Lord use this connection to his advantage?”

Harry should have seen that question coming, but the feeling of iron guilt dropping suddenly into his stomach made his blood run cold. He swallowed hard at the lump that formed in his throat as he prepared to relive the worst day of his life. “He already has, actually. Of course you know about the Ministry fiasco, considering it’s what put your father in jail. What you probably don’t know is why I was ever there in the first place.”

Draco stiffened as his expression turned stony. “Yes, I know a few details about it, but I never did hear the full story.”

“Well, you still won’t, but I can tell you the part that concerns why I must learn Occlumency. He implanted a false vision using the connection, making me believe he had my godfather at the Ministry and was torturing him. I went after my godfather only to be fooled; my godfather was safe at his home until he learned that I had been lured to the Ministry. I lost my godfather that night because I couldn’t tell the difference between dreams and reality. I need to be able to protect myself and others from letting it happen again. So, to answer your question, you’re protecting me and everyone else from Voldemort’s manipulations. Still agree to teach me?” Harry asked, almost hoping Draco had changed his mind after all.

Draco let his anger slip away, knowing nothing could be done now about his father. Besides, deep down, he knew his father belonged in Azkaban. “Of course I still agree to teach you. I simply wanted to know why; I think I’m entitled to that, at least.”

Harry shrugged as he rolled his wand back and forth across the wood surface of the table in an annoyed fashion. “I guess, just remember that all of this is included in the Oath alright?”

Draco nodded his agreement, positive that no one would believe him if he bothered to tell anyone anyways. “So, back to your question, then. In order to be able to call forth a block with no warning is simple really; always have your mind blocked. Even if you have the weakest of shields up, it’s much easier to strengthen these shields when you feel the first signs of outside penetration instead of trying to build the block from nothing. It takes awhile to get used to constantly blocking your mind, but once you know how it’s fairly simple to keep it up. What are the seven signs of outside penetration?”

Harry took a moment to think before holding up seven fingers to count them off. “Interrupted concentration, relapse of memory, foreign emotions, lack of blinking, sense of foreboding, quickly shifting thoughts, and strain on your powers.”

Draco nodded, finding himself impressed with Harry’s obvious knowledge. “The first sign, as you listed them in correct order, is an interruption in your concentration. There is a sense, something that cannot be adequately explained, that magical beings possess, telling them that there is something lurking in their mind that should not be there. That feeling, often described as a break in privacy, is what sets off the alarm bells that something isn’t right. The second sign, reliving memories and/or thoughts without recalling them yourself, is the obvious sign that you’re being Legilimized.” Draco stood up and began pacing, his wand held loosely at his side. He’d done this before, teaching a few fellow house mates the skill while at Hogwarts.

“With you, the circumstances may be a bit tweaked. As you must know, most Legilimency requires eye contact. However, if the Dark Lord can see into your mind from miles away, that rule obviously doesn’t apply, making things a bit more complicated for you when trying to pull up a block. Most people have the advantage of a warning, which gives them at least that split second to prepare their shields, but you do not get that luxury. For you, I think that inner sense of knowing something is there that shouldn’t be, and your admitted sense of foreign emotions are the strongest two signals you should focus on. With a constant block, at that first sign of outside penetration, the shield can quickly be strengthened to keep it out. It takes much more power to pull up a block from nothing than to strengthen a weak, constant shield.”

Harry took this all in, almost forgetting who was telling him all this as he never thought Draco would know this much about anything, let alone Occlumency and Legilimency. He was starting to feel nervous with Draco pacing like that, and could almost feel an impending attack. Just as a precaution, he pulled up a weak block and held it, as thought waiting for Draco to attack his mind. Sure thing, the blonde turned quickly and caught his eye, muttering the spell quickly. Harry immediately concentrated on his shield, making the form stronger and actively pushing Draco out.

Draco blinked and broke the spell, lowering his wand. “Merlin, Potter. I knew you learned fast, but I just told you what to do. How’d you know I was going to try that?” he asked in an annoyed voice.

“I’ve been learning Occlumency from Snape; paranoia is second nature. He’s pulled that one so many times, it was pretty predictable. I used a weak shield at first, but as soon as I saw you turn with your wand up, I strengthened it,” Harry explained, feeling slightly accomplished already. “So how do I maintain that weak shield? I usually have to concentrate for quite a bit to keep the shield up for long periods of time. It’s distracting, really.”

Draco sat back down across from Harry and slumped in his seat, feeling a little defeated by Harry’s quick thinking. “That’s the hard part. It’ll take practice and a bit of getting used to, but once you get it down, it becomes much easier. Snape has tried giving you menial tasks while blocking, correct? It’s just like that, but you never let it down, even in your sleep.”

Harry nodded his understanding of that, knowing very well that he had to maintain his block while sleeping. “That’s the main reason I had to start learning Occlumency. Your mind is weakest while you’re asleep, making yourself an easy target. I kept ‘dreaming’ I was seeing into Voldemort’s mind because I was most vulnerable while I was asleep. I can keep the block up while sleeping, that’s as long as I can hold it before my concentration wavers. I kind of think I get what you mean with keeping the block up constantly though. That’s why Snape seems so emotionless all the time, huh, because he’s always blocking his mind from external situations, including emotions?”

Draco nodded, again impressed that Harry even knew that much. “That’s part of it, though blocking certain emotion from breaking through is far more advanced than constant blockage. You’ll get there eventually I’m sure, but one thing at a time.”

“I don’t want to get there, to be honest. I’d rather seem emotional than emotionless,” Harry countered, remembering how he always felt that Snape seemed heartless in the way he never let his emotions show. Draco did it most of the time as well. Maybe it was a Slytherin thing, but Harry didn’t fancy the idea of seeming heartless. Wasn’t that what Dumbledore kept pounding into his head, anyways? That his ability to love was the power he held against Voldemort? So why would he suppress the one weapon he had ready access to?

“Emotions are a sign of weakness, Potter. Letting the enemy know your state of emotion gives them an advantage over you. It lets them know exactly how to push your buttons and what affects you the most simply by reading your emotions. They can manipulate you without ever having to enter your mind at all. You’re handing the Dark Lord weapons by expressing anger, sadness, panic, distress, even a sense of affection for someone else. They can all be used against you, but I’m sure you’ve already learned as much,” Draco said snidely, trying to make the stubborn Gryffindor realize he was wrong in this. He was feeling a bit stung as well, as he often blocked his emotions as well. Maybe Potter thought him heartless as well.

Harry steadfastly disagreed with this notion of suppressing emotions. “There is a difference between letting your emotions affect you and blocking your emotions completely. I can be scared out of my skull and still be able to mask that pretty well. With Snape, he blocks himself from feeling scared, he doesn’t allow himself to feel it, let alone express as much. I won’t allow myself to become cold and distant like he is, no matter how much danger I am in.”

Draco and Harry looked towards the door as the sound of a cloak brushing the ground met their ears. Snape was standing in the doorway, his expressionless face a fine example of their current conversation. Both teens could feel a sense of foreboding coming from the Potions Master and knew instantly that he was incensed as well as a bit stung. Surprising, considering his face still stayed his emotionless mask.

“You’re right, Potter, masking emotions and suppressing them are two very different things. However, the difference between needing to protect yourself from your own emotions and suppressing them out of ill will are also two very different things. It is not for you to decide which is which, nor is there a way to detect that difference. Seemingly heartless or not, I do what I do in the interests of protecting not just myself, but others such as the both of you. Cold and distant is far better than weak and emotional.”

Feeling properly chastised, Harry simply nodded his understanding as he dropped his eyes to the table, not wanting to face Snape any longer. There was obviously more to the man than Harry knew, but it wasn’t his fault that he was unaware, as Snape didn’t allow Harry to know anymore about him. If he felt so misunderstood, maybe he should let up on suppressing his emotions for just one second and allow people to see that he was in fact human with fully working emotions and a just as easily-broken heart as the next person. Harry would not allow himself to feel sorry for Snape for getting himself into this mess; he had dug his own proverbial grave and he’d have to lie in it. That was the first and only emotion Harry was willing to suppress.

S~S~S~S

Remus quietly exited his shared room and began to tiptoe to the kitchen for a small bite to eat. He hadn’t been sleeping very well again, and his blackened emotions as of late had kept him from joining the others at dinner that night. He turned as he felt someone’s eyes upon him. Harry was blinking at him in the dark, his face expressionless, eerily reminding Remus of the often expressionless face Sirius had acquired after many years of suppressing his emotions in Azkaban. He slowly walked over to the Gryffindor teen’s bed and sat on the edge, peering thoughtfully at him. “Can’t sleep either?”

Harry looked up at Remus and blinked, his concentration broken immediately. He cursed himself mentally as he sat up and rested against his pillows. “Yes and no. I’m trying to practise Occluding my mind constantly. So far I can only do it while I’m asleep, but the slightest distraction while I’m awake breaks my concentration and the block drops. It’s frustrating.”

Remus frowned sympathetically and reached a hand out to gently pat Harry’s leg. “I’m sorry you’re so frustrated, Harry, but I’m sure you’ll learn soon enough. You’ve always been such a quick learner as I can remember from my teaching days.”

Harry nodded, his frown deepening as he remembered what Draco had said about his knack for quick learning probably coming from Voldemort’s powers within him. “I dunno if that’s a good thing, though. I mean, obviously it’s to my advantage, but what it cost to attain that skill definitely wasn’t worth it.”

Remus’ brow scrunched in confusion as he curled a leg underneath him and got more comfortable, prepared to have a nice long talk with the obviously distressed boy – no, young man. “What do you mean by that, Harry?”

Harry sighed deeply as he looked away from Remus and stared out the single sitting room window, towards the ever twinkling stars in the inky black sky, the brightest one mocking him as his godfather’s namesake. “The reason I pick up spells more quickly than my peers is because I have extra power; the power that Voldemort transferred to me as a baby. I have an unfair advantage, and it cost me my parents to receive that advantage. I just want to be normal, even if it means struggling to learn difficult spells and skills like everyone else in my year at Hogwarts.”

Remus felt that familiar sadness grip his heart as he tightened his comforting grasp on Harry’s leg subconsciously. “Oh Harry...It’s not your fault that he attacked you and your parents when you were a baby. It’s really not anyone’s fault, but the person to blame is definitely Peter Pettigrew, not you. No one holds it against you that the attack on you as a baby provided you with stronger than normal magic,” he tried to reassure the teen, knowing how heavy that guilt was and wishing he could ease it off of Harry’s already overburdened shoulders.

“But they do. Kids at school, especially Slytherins, think I’m this big show off when I learn difficult spells ten times faster than everyone except Hermione. Draco does too, and he even knows why I learn things so quickly. Whether it’s their jealousy or envy or whatever it is, I don’t want people to resent me for something I can’t control. Sometimes I think it would be better to feign incompetence than let the other students see that I’ve mastered a spell much faster than everyone else.”

Remus sighed heavily and moved to sit beside Harry, making the teen move over so he could comfortably sit on the bed alongside him. “Harry, it shouldn’t matter where that extra power comes from. There isn’t really any way to tell where your magic stops, and Voldemort’s begins. It could very well be your own magical ability that helps you learn spells so quickly, not Voldemort’s powers influencing your skills. You should never allow yourself to be discouraged by what others think. What matters is that your stronger than average magical ability and your penchant for quick learning are put to good use, and you are very humble – beyond humble – about your incredible power. I have never known someone of your age to hold such amazing ability and still be able to keep your ego in check. Your father certainly failed in that department, and your mother even held her great skills over other’s heads when it was necessary. But you, Harry, you actually punish yourself for being a powerful Wizard, and you shouldn’t, because your greatness is determined not just by your magical abilities alone, but by how you use those abilities for good and not evil. You’re an incredible young man, Harry, and James and Lily and Sirius would be so proud of you. I know I am.”

Harry choked down a sob as he felt the stinging in his eyes turn to wetness on his cheeks. He turned and buried his face in Remus’ dressing gown, leaning heavily against his chest. All the pent up emotions had finally broken through and he could no longer keep them in. If this is what it felt like to hold in emotions for so long and finally release them, Harry couldn’t even imagine the type of breakdown Snape would have if he allowed himself to feel his emotions and outwardly express them.