"Master Severus has to drink his potion!" the creature stated, not a bit fussed by Severus' reaction.

Severus looked up at the head table, and what he saw made his blood freeze. Poppy was glaring at him, and Alastor had his arms crossed over his chest. This gesture always meant trouble. They had found out that he had poured the potion in the sink. But how? Harry could not have told them because he had been in classes. So how could they know? He was pulled out of his thoughts when the creature repeated its order again.

Sighing, Severus grabbed the vial and drained the potion as quick as possible. Pulling a face, he shoved the empty vial back at the house-elf and drained his glass of milk, mentally noting that he needed to go to the loo before he headed out for Care of Magical Creatures.

Severus had sullenly eaten almost half of his meal when he heard mumbles all around. Looking at the head table, he saw Poppy and Alastor leaving the hall. Dean Thomas stood close to them and glared in his direction. A suspicious glance over to where Harry normally sat made it obvious that Harry had not come for lunch. Now Severus was really worried. What had he done. What had he said to Harry?

-II-

Harry could feel Hermione shift, and he was placed into another person's arms. Bigger arms that were pulling him out of his cold hiding place. He shivered from the cold and did not even feel the normal tickling from the diagnostic spell because his limbs were so numb. A blanket with a Warming Charm was draped around him, and then he was lifted by the big arms again. He knew they were carrying him home, and that was where he wanted to be right now. At least he was loved by someone there. If Severus was pushing him away, he wanted to at least have Poppy and Alastor close by.

Alastor was concerned. Harry had not reacted to anything they had asked him. He was sobbing and shivering even with the blanket around him. They had heard only what Hermione and Ron could tell them, and that was not much, just that it was something with Severus. Something about Severus leaving Harry alone and insulting him. Right now they could not waste time thinking about it. They needed Harry back in their quarters to warm him up and give him a Pepper-up Potion before he caught a cold. Everything else had to wait for later.

James came quickly after they had called for one of the Healers, and he spent the next two hours soothingly feeding healing and calming magic into Harry. From time to time, he tried to talk with Harry about what happened. Several times, Harry woke and fell asleep without answering James questions, but in the end, he opened up and told him about what Severus had done.

/

Severus became even more nervous when he realized that Harry was not amongst the Gryffindors that went to Hagrid's cabin. He had told his new classmates that he wanted to go speak with Harry by himself, and so he now was amongst Gryffindors without noticing it soon enough. When he finally did, it was too late, and he was pulled into a dark corner.

"Look who we have here," Leroy said evilly. "The little Potions Master, all alone. Yeah, who would want to be close to someone that slimy and evil?"

Severus fumbled, panicking for his wand, but a rough shove from Leroy's knee in his private region stopped him. "We don't want an accident to happen. I mean, your little performance in Transfiguration has made the round quite quickly and speaks volumes of your skills with a wand." With that, Leroy pulled Severus' wand out of his trouser and threw it into the bush nearby. "Oh, my, I forgot to go to the toilet. What a pity. Now I have to get rid of some pressure in my bladder. Can't afford to let you go, can I, Professor?"

Severus paled when he realized what the fat bully was saying. He was badly reminded of Potter and Black. He tried to struggle, but even if he had been a normal-sized teenager, he would not have stood a chance against this bull of a boy. So he could only stare in horror at the fat hand that was unzipping Leroy's trousers. "Ha, look at how he's waiting in anticipation at what I'm doing. Is our little professor gay?" Leroy mocked Severus. Greg was laughing at every stupid comment and insult Leroy made.

"Severus? Severus?" Several people were calling for him. It seemed the Ravenclaws had decided enough time had passed for Severus to speak with his brother.

"Damn," Leroy cursed, after Greg had told him that they were close. He shoved himself back in his trouser and punched Severus hard in his ribs. "Don't think we are finished with you, Professor. Now we are the ones making your life a living Hell and not the other way around."

Severus sank down the cold stone wall of the castle when Leroy finally let go of him. A last kick was aimed at his stomach, which hit Severus' hands as well. The boys laughed evilly at his groan of pain before vanishing in the opposite direction of the calls.

Severus did not want to be found, and therefore he stayed calm, praying that they would pass him. They did. The bush he had crawled behind was hiding him. His hands hurt. He did not know what was wrong with them. When he could finally breathe normally, he stood up. The pain in his ribs was strong, but he was used to pain, and so he merely grit his teeth. He inspected his hands. Besides the fact that they were red, he could not see any damage even though he could hardly move them. Hiding them in his pockets, he made his way to Hagrid's hut. He hoped they had not already headed into the forest.

They had not. They were splitting into groups-or rather, searching troops-when Hagrid finally spotted him. "Severus! Where have you been?"

Severus looked around. Damn, why didn't I think about a cover story before I came here? "Ehm...I needed to go to the loo."

Snorting came from the Gryffindors, but Hagrid ended it soon with a glare.

"Next time, tell someone that you will be late, Severus. We were already starting to search for you," Hagrid said, annoyed but relieved. "Now, let's start our lesson. Today I will show you Gurgle gnomes. I have located a colony a few yards into the forest. I hope they are still there. Let's go!" he waved his big hands, and the teenagers started to follow him.

"Are you all right?" Alicia asked, worried. Something looked odd about Severus.

"Sure," Severus said sullenly and hoped he could shove her away with his behavior.

"I don't believe you at all," Alicia hissed at him, so nobody could hear her. "You wanted to speak with Harry, but the Gryffindors say he was brought back to your quarters after we left him."

Severus just ignored her. What else could he do? After a while it worked, and she gave up trying to talk with him. After Hagrid had finished his class-or what he called a class, because they did not find anything interesting in the forest-Severus almost ran for the castle. Alicia and Oliver watched the retreating black dot heading to the castle. "Something happened. I know it!" Alicia stated.

"Yeah, I have the same feeling," Oliver said when they made their way back to the castle.

/

Severus went straight to the bathroom when he had entered the quarters. Cold water did a wonderful job on his hurting hands. The warmness in his pockets had made the pain worse, and now his hands did not only look red but were swollen as well. His ribs were not better, but he could not do anything about it. When Healer Meyers threatened to knock down the door, Severus sighed. How can I hide my hands from them? She wants to do those exercises today. I bet I will pass out if she even touches them.

"Severus, I'm come in now whether you like it or not!" Healer Meyers said, and Severus could feel the shift in the wards. Quickly, he put his hands back into his trouser pockets and realized too late that he had forgotten to dry them. The uncomfortable wetness soaked not only to the front of his trousers but ran down his legs as well.

"What's going on, Severus?" Healer Meyers asked, worried.

"Nothing," Severus spat. "I was just trying to use the bathroom."

Maria eyed him closely, and then her eyes fell on his wet trousers. "What happened with your pants?"

Severus looked down. He had no clue what he could say to make her go away.

"Why don't you show me your hands, Severus?"

And there it was. The feeling that thousands of ants were running around in his body. He was trapped. He tried to think faster, but his brain refused to work at all. Severus could not say anything. Petrified, he waited for the Damocles sword to hit him.

"Need help here?" James asked when he entered the bathroom.

"Yes, why don't you take Severus with you on the toilet seat, and I'll have a look at his hands?"

Severus wanted to run. Oh, how he wanted to run, but his legs did not move. Nothing moved, so James picked Severus up like a doll and sat down with him on his lap. The moment James wrapped his arm around Severus' torso, the boy winced in pain. Severus hoped the pain would fade, but the prodding hand roamed over his chest and ribs until it found the place where it hurt the most. Tickling magic flowed to the bruise, but the soothing magic Severus wished for was not there. Yes, it would be so good to let James' soothing magic overcome him. Maybe he would even black couldn't everything go numb? Why couldn't their voices start to sound muffled?Severus wished for it so hard.

But it did not happen. As his hands were pulled out of his pockets, and he could hear James telling Maria about what he had found. "Two broken ribs."

"What happened, Severus?" Maria asked, not letting go of his hands.

He did not want to talk to them, and so he just closed his eyes in hopes that numbness and deafness would come with the darkness, but Severus never got what he wanted, and the torture went on.

"Severus, please tell us. What happened?" James tried this time.

"Let me alone," Severus said miserably.

"We cannot help you if you don't tell us what happened," Maria said, very worried.

"I just want to die. Why did I come back here? I should have let him kill me. Nothing changed. Nothing!" He could not stop the sobs that wracked through his body and it made his ribs hurt even more.

"I will heal his ribs first. Then we can go on talking," James stated and shifted under Severus until he found the correct position. "This will hurt, Severus, but I promise I will numb the pain as soon as I have healed you ribs." He positioned his left hand over Severus' broken ribs, and he drew Severus' head back against his shoulder with his right hand.

Unbelievable pain shot through Severus' body. It started in his ribs as if a red-hot knife was plunged in his chest. Slowly, unbearably, it spread from the place where James' hand rested over his chest. As if hit by a shock wave, the pain exploded though his whole body from head to toe. As quickly as this shock wave had come, the soothing magic overtook his body. Severus felt great relief, but also lost all control. He sagged in James' arms. With dread, he realized that the liquid that ran down his legs into James' trousers was no longer cold water from his hands; it was warm liquid. The 'accident' James had spoken about had happened.

Severus whimpered miserably and tried to pull his legs together to hide the accident with his hands. The soothing magic made all his movements very exhausting and slow.

"Shh, Severus, it's okay," James said in his ear.

"No, it isn't," Severus replied, in despair. Suddenly he felt a fresh breeze and he was dry again.

"Everything is okay, Severus, relax," Maria said calmingly.

Slowly the soothing magic ebbed, and James released Severus' forehead.

"Please look at me, Severus," Maria prompted, but Severus just shook his head, his eyes still closed. He could not look at them.

Gentle hands started to stroke his hair. "Please, Severus."

"I just want to be left alone!" Severus said miserably. He still wanted to run and hide. Nobody could help him. Everything was like it was his first time at school and maybe even worse. Potter and Black would have never tried peeing on him. What else were those bullies capable of? What would they do to him next time? Severus would prefer to die than undergo that kind of humiliation again.

"Severus, please tell us what happened," Maria said while she let healing magic flow into the bruised hands.

No, he would not tell them what happened. That would mean they would finally see what a freak he really was, that he was such a weak baby that other students could push him around like this. No, he would not tell them. "I fell down the stairs."

Maria exchanged a glance with James. "Okay, Severus, I will finish healing your hands, and then we go to the living room and talk."

Five minutes later, his hands were numb like his ribs and he was wrapped in a warm blanket. He was not even asked if he was capable of going to the living room by himself; he was just lifted in James' arms. On the way, Severus hid his face in James' shoulder in shame. In the living room, he was placed with his back against James' chest on the couch; Maria arranged the blanket over his body.

Curiously, Severus opened his eyes. Alastor and Poppy looked shocked and worried at him while Maria explained what kind of bruises he had. Harry was draped in a blanket as well and was leaning against Alastor's body on the other couch. Maria sat down beside them.

"What happened, Severus?" Poppy asked, shocked, and knelt down in front of him.

James still let soothing magic flow into him, so lying was not so easy but still possible. The pained look on Poppy's face made Severus feel bad. No, he could not tell them. He wanted to be strong. Harry should be the one they should worry about, not him. He should be the responsible and independent one. He would not tell them. He could handle it himself.

"I'm fine; I just fell down the stairs," Severus lied.

"Severus, you don't get those injuries by falling down stairs," James stated calmly.

"But I did! I fell down! Why don't you stop asking me? That's how it happened, and it won't change no matter how often you repeat the question," Severus said angrily. Why couldn't they just let him be?

"It were Leroy and Greg, weren't they-?" Harry asked, shocked, but was stopped by Severus' harsh words.

"Stop it!" Severus said, with such a fire in his voice that Harry cringed backwards against Alastor's chest. Before someone could comment on this outburst, they could see the change in Severus' face. "I'm sorry!" he whispered, shocked at Harry's reaction. "I...I..."

Harry looked pained at Severus, but then he went over to his brother and lay down on the couch with him. He rested his head against Severus' chest, not bothered by James' hand that still fed Severus with soothing and healing magic. "Please, Severus, don't push me away again. You are everything I have here."

Yes, Severus had to go to school here. It would be cowardly to ask to be home schooled. He would be running away from them and leaving Harry alone at Hogwarts. He could not do this. He was the big brother. "I won't. I'm here." He laid his hand over Harry's head and gently stroked the unruly black hair. Strangely, it soothed Severus as well.

Harry looked up hopefully. "So was it Leroy and Greg?"

Severus' hand cramped shortly in Harry's hair, but then he remembered his plan and answered, "No, like I said, I fell down the stairs. I hit the banister with my hands, and then I fell down on the edge of a step with my ribs." Yes, that sounds plausible, Severus thought, satisfied. Unfortunately, he was the only one who thought so.

"I will stop them, I swear," Harry said, determined, into Severus' chest.

"Severus, when you finally decide to talk about the stairs, we will be here, okay?" James said, ignoring Alastor's and Poppy's shocked faces. Maria laid a calming hand on Alastor's arm when the man wanted to stand up and tell James what he thought about putting this topic aside. "Harry, why don't you tell us about your day?"

Harry looked up, puzzled. Wasn't it Severus who was more important right now? "What do you want me to tell you?"

"Just how your first day was. How you felt. Start from the moment you woke up," James instructed.

Harry thought about how to start. "When I woke up, Severus was already awake. I thought it was great to sleep in one room with him. I liked not being alone when I sleep," Harry said and gnawed at his bottom lip. He looked into James' face, but when he went on, he rested his head back on Severus' chest because it was so soothing. "Then we went to breakfast." He avoided the part in the kitchen deliberately. "I hoped Severus would be sorted into Gryffindor, but he was sorted into Ravenclaw. That means we have only four classes together. At least they are all double classes, and besides Astronomy we have them twice a week."

Severus almost drifted into sleep. Only the refreshing magic the Healer sent him whenever he became too tired stopped him from falling asleep. Harry's head felt so good against his chest. He felt safe with his little brother so close, and he had loved to sleep in one room with Harry. It was good to hear Harry's gentle breathing when he woke up several times during the night. Severus realized that he could fall asleep much easier to the sound of Harry's breathing.

"Then the first class started. It was so stupid. They all tried to sit beside me and fought over the seat. I have Melinda sitting beside me almost all the time, and she is awful. She stares at me all the time and asks all kind of stupid questions like what my favorite color is and what I like about girls. She is just stupid like the rest of my classmates. I don't want to have anything to do with them. At least Ron, Hermione, Dean-" Harry yawned tiredly, "-Neville, and all the other still want to be my friends." A hand was placed on his shoulder, and he felt an energy wave go through his body. It was not uncomfortable, but Harry was surprised. Puzzled, he looked up at James, who just smiled.

"So your first class wasn't that good. What happened next?" James asked.

"Oh, yeah. We had Transfiguration, and I was so glad to see Severus again, but he was..." Harry stopped, uncertain if he should go on, but he had told the story before to the Healer, and so it would be unfair not to go on now when Severus was present.

"A jerk," Severus ended Harry's sentence before he could.

"Yes, you were. You didn't even listen to me, just pushed me away and on our way to the Great Hall, you really-"

"Overstepped the border," Severus interrupted.

"Hey, I'm telling the story here!" Harry protested.

"But I'm one of the main characters, and so I should be allowed to add things."

"Add, but not interrupt, Severus," James explained. "You will be able to tell us about your day later."

Severus grumbled but kept his mouth close.

"So you...you were very mean. I felt as if you didn't want me to be your brother anymore. It hurt," Harry said miserably and hid in Severus' chest.

"I'm sorry," Severus said. "I always want you to be my brother. I shouldn't have said what I said."

"I forgive you, but you will never say things like that again, right? And you won't push me away again, right?"

Severus sighed. "I will try."

Harry glared at him.

"That's all I can say, Harry. I don't even understand myself lately. I don't know why I said all those things or why I pushed you away. That moment in the hall, I didn't even realize how much I hurt you. How can I promise to not hurt you like this again when maybe I can't even realize it?"

"Then I will tell you when you hurt me!" Harry said, determined.

"That's a very good idea, Harry," Maria stated from the opposite couch.

Harry beamed. He had a good idea that even the adults liked.

"Okay," Severus agreed and pulled a face at the smile on his brother's face. "You look like one of those awful smiley buttons Luna is wearing on her school bag."

Harry smiled even more after that comment.

"Will you go on with your report, Harry?" James prodded.

"Oh, yeah, ehm...when you left me in the hall, I hid behind an armor, and Hermione and Ron found me later. They tried to comfort me, but I was too sad. Then Alastor and Poppy came, and they brought me here. James warmed me up, and I slept and then we talked, and Maria joined us as well. Then you came in and ran directly into the bathroom." Bang! The depressing mood was back.