How We Fall by JAWorley
Summary: After helping Draco Malfoy escape the custody of Sirius Black, Harry endures the wrath of his Godfather. When Snape comes looking for Draco, Harry tells him that Draco has run away, and that he won’t tell him where Draco is unless Snape takes Harry with him. **Note** I'm aware that some of you don't like bad!Sirius stories. Don't worry, Sirius isn't actually in the story much, however there is redemption in the end. It's not so much that he's just bad, more that he's fallen. This story is about how people fall, and how they can make it back out in the end, getting a second chance. It is NOT a character bashing story.
Categories: Healer Snape, Parental Snape > Biological Father Snape, Teacher Snape > Trusted Mentor Snape, Teacher Snape > Professor Snape, Parental Snape > Guardian Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Draco, Dumbledore, Filch, Flitwick, Ginny, Hagrid, Hedwig, Hermione, McGonagall, Neville, Original Character, Other, Pomfrey, Remus, Ron, Sirius, Voldemort
Snape Flavour: Snape is Angry, Canon Snape, Snape Comforts, Snape is Kind, Snape is Loving, Snape is Mean, Snape is Stern
Genres: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, Family, General, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Addicted!Harry, Animagus!Harry, Azkaban Character, Hospitalization, Injured!Harry, Physical Impairment, Runaway
Takes Place: 6th summer, 6th Year
Warnings: Abusive Dursleys, Character Death, Drug use, Neglect, Physical Punishment Non-Spanking, Profanity, Romance/Het, Violence
Prompts: Unforgivable Sirius
Challenges: Unforgivable Sirius
Series: None
Chapters: 30 Completed: Yes Word count: 114827 Read: 260900 Published: 26 Feb 2012 Updated: 28 Jul 2015
Souvenirs by JAWorley
Author's Notes:
“Scars are souvenirs we never lose.” -Goo Goo Dolls ‘Name’
Severus could tell who was on the other side of his door by the type of knock he heard. Most students gave a timid knock, and often there were shuffling feet to be heard to accompany it. The headmaster never knocked at all, he just came and went as he pleased. McGonagall's knock was stern and sharp, but she rarely came calling.

"Come in Draco," Severus said, setting his quill down on his desk. With the castle empty there were only two people it could be on the other side, and he doubted very much Potter would come to see him. As far as he was concerned Potter was to blame for the injuries that had befallen Draco, and Potter must have known it as well. Draco had not yet given him the full story, but he was sure it entailed Potter causing the start of the trouble.

Draco opened the door and came in, and the look on his face explained why the knock had sounded... off. Perhaps more gentle than normal.

"Uncle Severus?"

"Yes?" He leaned back in his chair and laced his fingers together in his lap. Severus wanted the child to know he had his full attention, especially after what he'd been through in the past months, essentially losing both parents to this war, and then being tormented, beaten, and starved by a mad man.

When Draco failed to take his usual seat in the more worn of the two visitor's chairs, Severus raised a brow, prompting Draco to speak.

"I wanted to talk to you about something."

"I'm listening."

Draco hesitated before continuing on. "You know I've been hanging around with Harry the last few days."

"I am aware." Why, he would probably never understand. Despite any guilt the Potter boy may have felt after causing Draco so much trouble, it would not suffice as an apology nor a free pass out of the trouble he'd gotten Draco into.

"Well, I think he's having a really hard time with... you know. All of this."

"Draco, have a seat." He motioned to the chair, and Draco finally sat down.

Severus wanted to stop the conversation here, but Draco hadn't really talked about what had happened since they'd found him. He'd given a very general summary of events, but nothing concrete. Severus did not want to forestall anything Draco might need to say about his experience.

Scratching his head, Draco said, "He's really Jittery, you know. I think he thinks Black will come after him."

Severus remembered what Potter had shouted after being apparated away, about Black finding him, but he hadn't thought much of it. Likely Harry had gotten into a scuffle with Draco over something or had angered Sirius and gotten a good grounding and didn't want to be caught and made to complete said punishment.

"I'm sure Potter will be fine," he finally said, seeing that Draco was waiting for a response.

"I don't know. You should have seen him when we went to Hogsmead for clothes. He looked over his shoulder about every ten seconds. And-" he paused, making Severus narrow his eyes.

"And what Draco?"

Draco bit his lip and Severus knew from the nervous habit that his godson was uncertain about something, perhaps even concerned.

"I go up to the Gryffindor dorms to get him sometimes. Usually he's got the door warded closed. That's ok I guess, but twice now I went up in the morning before he was awake, and he wasn't in his bed."

"And this is abnormal how?"

"Well at first I just thought I'd missed him, but then I saw his foot sticking out from under his bed. I got down on the floor to look, and he was sleeping under there with his pillow."

"And what did Mr. Potter have to say about this?" It was definitely a curiosity. Even in the summer the floor would be hard and cold, and not conducive to sleeping.

"I left before he woke up and went back later. I never asked him about it."

"And what do you have to say about it?"

"I think he's scared of Black. I mean... you saw how bad he was. And he kept having nightmares in the cabin."

"He was delirious. A fever often induces nightmares."

"Still. You don't- you don't know what it was like being there with that raving lunatic." Here Draco shuddered as he looked up into his godfather's eyes. "I'd hate to think what all he did to Harry when he found out that Harry'd helped me."

"Certainly not worse than was done to you."

"I don't know," Draco said. "I hate that bastard, but I'm not scared of him. But look at Harry."

Severus brought a hand up to his temple to rub it. He would really like to just dismiss this here and now and think no further on it, but his godson was still sitting there looking at him expectantly. He would be remiss in his duties as the boy's godfather and guardian if he did not look into it, if for no other reason than he did not want to make Draco think that his opinions and feelings counted for nothing.

"I will... look into it," he finally said, and a relieved look swept over Draco's face.

"Just look at him next time you see him. Watch how he acts."

Severus gave a nod and then Draco left. If anybody else had asked him to reconsider his feelings about Harry bloody Potter, even the headmaster (who had often done so) he would have ignored said request. But Draco was the closest thing he had to a son, and he would not disappoint him. The boy had suffered enough disappointments in his life.

* * *

To the casual observer, it would have been obvious that Harry was struggling with something big. Severus Snape was not just a casual observer however. In fact he was an observer with a mission: watch Harry Potter (briefly) just so that he could tell Draco he'd done it for him. It was with this mission in mind that he attended dinner that night instead of taking the meal in his quarters.

Draco and Harry were already sitting in the Entrance Hall when he arrived, sweeping in quietly as he observed the pair. Draco was on one side of the table, chatting about something Quidditch related as he ate steak and kidney pie, and Potter was on the other side, head down and eyes averted, thus not noticing the arrival of their Potion's Master.

"Draco."

Harry startled violently at the unexpected voice, jumping on his seat as he looked for the sound of the voice. Upon seeing that it was only his Potion's Master wearing a curious look on his face, he calmed a little and his cheeks tinged red.

"Mr. Potter," Severus said, sitting beside Draco at the Ravenclaw student table. He rarely sat at the student tables, but occasionally the Headmaster held staff meetings in the Great Hall in the early morning hours, usually at Hufflepuff table.

"Hello sir," Harry said quietly, going back to observing his mostly empty plate.

Severus served himself a healthy portion of food as he engaged Draco in conversation about a broom he wanted to purchase with money out of the Malfoy vault, all the while watching as Harry picked at his food, not taking more than three bites.

"Harry... you ok?"

Harry and Severus both looked up at Draco's question.

"Just not feeling well is all," Harry said rubbing one side of his face.

"Are you sick again?"

"I don't think so. I think I'll go to bed early tonight though." He stood up from the table and said, "Excuse me," before hurrying off and out of the hall. Severus did not fail to notice the wand the boy kept out and at his side.

"He doesn't eat much," Draco said when he was sure Harry was gone. "It's always like this now."

"Most likely a ploy for attention," Severus said, but even as he said it he wasn't sure if he believed it in full. Potter was an attention seeker, that he was sure of, but to carry on like this for nearly a week to gain the attention of Draco, his longtime schoolyard enemy? Perhaps this was something worth looking into a little more.

"Do not worry yourself over this anymore," Severus tried to reassure Draco. "It will be taken care of."

Draco nodded a silent thanks. He wanted to believe it, he really did. Uncle Severus had never let him down before, but would he let Harry down? It was a possibility given the dislike they had for each other, much as Draco had once had.

* * *

Harry had told Draco that he wasn't sick, but it had been a lie. As soon as he was out of the Great Hall he'd hurtled through the Entrance Hall and up the stairs to the nearest boy's loo, where he had up with the small amount of dinner he had eaten. Alone in the stall by himself, once again warded against dangerous intruders, Harry gave a single sob. He didn't know what was wrong with him or why he had to feel this way. He felt sickened with himself, and broken at the same time. Draco had been hit and punished, but he wasn't wallowing around in self-pity or loathing. No, there was definitely something wrong with him, just Harry. Why else would Dumbledore deny him the chance to stay at the castle every year? Why else would the Weasleys decide not to take him in? Why else would Sirius wail on him until he cried, and then wail on him some more?

* * *

"Potter?"

Harry looked up from where he stared out the window towards the Quidditch pitch.

"Yes sir?"

"I would like to have some words with you."

"Oh... ok." Harry followed him at a distance down through the castle, but was surprised when they turned left to go into the Great Hall instead of right to go down into the Dungeons.

"Have a seat Potter."

Harry wanted desperately to sit facing the door, but Snape had already taken a seat facing the door and it would be too awkward to go and sit right next to him. He carefully took a seat facing Snape, and could not resist the urge to look back over his shoulder.

"I would like to know what happened during your stay at Grimmuald Place."

Harry met his eyes briefly, and then looked down at the table. He probably wanted to know what had happened to Draco, and Harry wondered then if he'd go after Sirius to take some sort of revenge. Harry didn't know if he wanted that or not, but did know that he just wanted to have done with this whole ordeal and not think about it anymore.

"I went to stay with Sirius. I'd only been there a few days when Professor Dumbledore dropped Draco off. Sirius gave him the room next to mine. Draco wasn't happy about it at first, but he just stayed in his room mostly. It was a few days before things started to get... bad."

"Continue."

Harry looked up when Snape had spoken, and then faltered, remembering once again who he was talking to. This man cared nothing for him. No, he would just give a brief rundown of events and have done with it, he told himself.

"Draco slept late one morning, and Sirius said he could just miss breakfast... but he meant for good. Draco threw a fit so Sirius set him to chores, but when Draco missed lunch the next day because he was doing chores, Sirius said he could just miss lunch permanently as well. I tried taking extra food to him to keep with him but Sirius found out and put a ward on the kitchen so no food could leave it.

"I doubt very much that you tried to help Draco, but by all means Potter, do continue." His tone was condescending, and Harry faltered again as he looked up, and then back down to the table. His throat tightened, but not with anger. He wasn't sure if it was fear or not, but he didn't like the feeling.

"Draco got really weak, and if he slept too late, Sirius started to hit him. One day he had to spend the whole day in bed because Sirius had hit him in the stomach hard and he was too sick to get up. I did some of his chores so he wouldn't have to do so many the next day, but Sirius made him do them all anyway. I wasn't allowed to help. Sirius made me stay with him and play... play board games while Draco was cleaning."

Snape made a comment about how Harry must have enjoyed sitting there playing games all day, but Harry wasn't listening very well or perhaps he could have mustered some anger to ward off the other feelings beginning to overtake him. His story was nearing an end, which meant more unpleasant thoughts were swarming near the surface of his mind.

Looking down at his hands, he realized they were shaking under the table, and the rest of his body felt shaky as well. "It got real bad for Draco, and one day we knew he couldn't keep going like that. Sirius had already broken his broom and set his owl loose. He hadn't been fed at all in three days. So, so that's when I gave him my broom and he climbed out my window, because his windows were warded shut."

Severus listened intently. Draco had still not spoken much of his ordeal, and while Severus doubted the authenticity of some of the details of Potter's story, he was gaining an inside look into his godson's summer thus far.

"What happened after that?" At least he could tell Draco that he had talked to Harry, Severus thought as the boy gave another uneasy look over his shoulder to the door. He was reminded of Harry doing the same thing sitting on the couch back at Grimmuald Place.

"You came to find Draco and apparated me away."

"What happened between Draco escaping and me coming to look for him."

Severus didn't know what he expected, but it wasn't the way Potter acted next. Instead of answering he tilted his head a little and rubbed one hand up along the side of his face hard, tangling his fingers in his hair as his hand came back down. He refused to look anywhere but a specific spot on the table, although Severus was sure the boy wasn't seeing it.

"Potter?"

Harry looked up, and Severus did notice Harry's shaking hands now. "Sir?"

"What happened between those times?"

"Nothing sir," Harry said, swallowing hard. If Snape had cared at all he would have asked in the first place... would have healed Harry on their journey to find Draco. No, Harry couldn't give him any ammunition to use against him in the future.

"How did you become bruised?"

"I don't know sir," Harry lied. If not for Harry's other mannerisms, the shaking hands would still have given him away.

"Can I go now?"

Severus eyed him carefully. "To where? To hide under your bed?"

Harry looked up at that, hurt playing across his face, and Severus knew then that Draco had not been lying when he'd said he'd seen Harry sleeping under the bed.

Without being dismissed, Harry stood and walked away, hand still tangling itself in his hair on one side as he went. I've nowhere else to go, Harry thought to himself as he made for a bathroom again, sickened with himself and with the conversation he'd had with Snape. The man had implied several times that this was Harry's fault. Sirius had implied the same thing by telling him he was a shame to his family. Was it Harry's fault? Could he have prevented Draco from being hurt? Could the summer have turned out differently?

Back in the Great Hall, Severus Snape did not know quite what to think. Draco had not spoken about the ordeal, and did not seem to be struggling with it either, aside from the fact that he was worried about Potter. Potter on the other hand could not speak about the ordeal without causing himself internal struggle, and yet could not seem to move past it either.

Severus stood and made his way out of the Great Hall, a lot on his mind to take in and think about.

The End.
End Notes:
Thoughts? What will happen next? I do actually have something in mind for the next chapter, but you've still got time to get thoughts/ requests in for the story! What would you like to see?

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