Harry took a breath as he opened the door, staring at his godfather and Remus in horror. Snape wasn’t here, and he didn’t want to mess things up again, but he didn’t know what to do.

“What do you want?” He said quietly.

“To talk to you, we might have said some things before that we didn’t mean,” Remus said carefully.

Harry narrowed his eyes, he had been hurt by so many people, it was so much easier to hold onto the anger, then to forgive them. When you forgave them, it gave them the power back to hurt you again if they choose to do so.

“Harry if you’ll just let us explain,” Sirius said softly.

“First off learn my name, Harry died and with any luck he’ll stay dead. My name is Emerson, if you want to talk to me, you will address me as such,” he said quietly.

“Sorry Emerson, but may we finish this discussion inside?” Remus interjected.

“What discussion?” Harry asked casually.

“This one, I know you don’t want to talk to us, but you need to hear this,” Remus said.

“You don’t know what I need. What I need is for you too to leave me the hell alone, I don’t want to talk to you,” Harry retorted.

“Has Snape been brainwashing you? What do you mean you don’t want to talk to us?” Sirius asked in shock.

“This has nothing to do with Snape, but has everything to do with me.” Harry replied tiredly. They just didn’t get it, why should he have to explain it to them, were they his shrink?

“Can we just talk for a little bit Harry?” Remus asked once again as if Harry didn’t understand the first time.

“Fine,” Harry grumbled letting them inside the apartment.

“Where’s Snivellous?” Sirius asked cheerfully as he looked around.

Harry glared at him darkly, but he didn’t dignify that with a response. He knew they were wondering what the matter with him was, but he also knew they wouldn’t get it. He was no longer Harry Potter; the boy really did die that morning in the infirmary. He was a new person, someone he would have been if he hadn’t had the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Was it his fault he relished in the security of being plain? He didn’t want to go back to being Harry Potter, and he knew he couldn’t help them. They wanted him to be something he wasn’t, why couldn’t they see that what they wanted wasn’t going to help him? Didn’t they get that being Harry Potter nearly shattered him? He knew in his heart that he wasn’t completely fixed, he was cracked all around.

Harry took a seat in Snape’s chair, trying to get comfort in any form he could as he stared warily at his godfather.

“Ok Harry let’s talk,” Sirius started off.

Harry twitched his jaw clenching as he tried to occlude the feeling of anger away. That name was grating on his nerves. He spelled a privacy charm around them, he knew Neville would be out for the next few hours but as he had learned Slytherins were suspicious people.

“What do you want to talk about?” Harry asked quietly.

“Why did you try to kill yourself?” Remus asked softly.

~*~*~*~Dungeons~*~*~*~

“What if he pushes me away?” Hermione asked quietly in the chill of the dungeons. She knew they were in Slytherin territory but the knowledge didn’t frighten her. She knew Blaise would protect her, not that she needed protection. She sighed; she did need protection, but only from herself. Her arms were starting to itch a bit the further they got into the dungeons, and she wasn’t sure if they were healing or if they meant something else again.

“He won’t,” Blaize said confidently. And he knew it was the truth, he was digging deep to try to forgive the man so he could help Mione, because he didn’t think he could do it alone. How did he not notice what was going on? He should have recognized the signs, he was familiar with it. A few of his friends had dealt with similar issues in the past, he should have known, and he was frustrated at himself for not seeing it.

“You can’t know that, he can be very cruel,” She murmured sadly.

“I know that,” he answered. “But try not to let that get to you,”

“I can’t help it; I don’t have very thick skin. Words do hurt you know,” she said quietly.

“I know they do Mione,” he replied softly.

“They sometimes hurt worse than physical hits. People don’t think about the horrible things they say, but sometimes I just wish I was deaf.” She admitted, the tears falling freely down her face.

“Why do you wish that?” He asked tenderly.

“So I wouldn’t have to hear every cruel and heartless thing they say about me. Just because I don’t react all the time, doesn’t mean it doesn’t get to me. It hurts inside here,” she replied placing her hand over her heart.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered regretfully. He didn’t know what to say.

“It’s ok; I’m just tired of feeling not good enough. Like I’m lesser then other people, sometimes I wish I didn’t have magic, but then I remember muggle kids are just as cruel. I’m a loser in both worlds, and all because I love to learn,” she confessed, he heart feeling more torn then she had ever felt.

“Oh Mione,” he murmured before turning around to hug her tightly.

“I don’t try to show off; I just want them to know that I’m not lower than them. I’m not stupid and being a muggleborn doesn’t make me lesser than everyone else. I have fucking feelings,” she nearly screamed out tearfully as she cried into his shoulder.

“I know Mione, I do know that I’ve seen,” he repeated over and over again.

“Then why can’t they?” She sobbed out softly.

~*~*~*Abandoned Corridor~*~*~*~

Draco shook his head brokenly as he cried into his knees. He could feel a hand on his shoulder, but he wasn’t sure who was there exactly. Who was witnessing his shame? Strangely he could careless at the moment; his heart was hurting something fierce.

“Now do you see Draco Malfoy?” Luna whispered softly as she rubbed his back.

Draco flinched at the voice, but he found himself nodding that he did get it. The whole school was out of sorts, and here he was making it worse. How could he say something like that? What if he had lost one of his best friends and Weasely had said something similar? He would have felt awful, how could he be so mean? Why? He didn’t have a reason, he couldn’t explain it.

“I see,” he whispered mournfully. “I’m sorry for what’s it worth,” he replied quietly. He felt lower then dirt at that point in time. He was starting to see that they were all magical beings, and you cannot choose who you were born into.

“I know you are, and its worth a lot more then you think,” she replied just as soft.

Draco cautiously rested his head on her shoulder, his tears never letting up. He wasn’t sobbing but the steady flow of tears never faltered.  He felt so worn out, but at the same time a bit free. What did this mean? He was happy she was there for him, but he found himself longing for something more. He wanted the comfort that Emerson had provided Granger, but would Luna give him that. Did she think he deserved it? Did he deserve to heal, wasn’t this all his fault in the first place?

“You’re not fully to blame Draco, it’s a number of people who share that role,” Luna said cutting into his depressing thoughts.

“Are you a mind reader?” He blurted out, before flushing in embarrassment.

“I can be, but you’re thoughts are just very loud at the moment.” She answered turning to look him in the eye.

Draco looked down, unable to keep her gaze. She looked like she could see into his soul, he felt ashamed and dirty. He didn’t want her to see that, he felt so exposed.

“You deserve comfort Draco, just like everyone else. All you have to do is ask,” she murmured softly.

“How do I do that?” He asked quietly, his vulnerability showing.

“It’s different for everyone,” she replied airily.

“That doesn’t help me at all,” he whimpered out, bending his head back down.

“Would you like a hug Draco?” She whispered, when it seemed he wouldn’t speak up.

He couldn’t answer, but he didn’t need to. His face said it all, and she turned her body and hugged him. She felt his arm around her and they held her tightly. She wasn’t surprised at his grip, but she was surprised at his cries in her shoulder. Her robes were getting wet, but she allowed it, knowing he needed this.

“I’m sorry Luna, I’m sorry Harry, I’m sorry Ron,” Draco sobbed out. “I’m just so sorry,” he wailed out.

“I know, I know,” she said soothingly.

~*~*~*Hogwarts~*~*~*

Severus limped through the doors of the castle, his whole body on fire. He quickly banished his robes and mask to his bedroom, and straighten up his teaching robe. He was trying to see if there was any way to get around the Dark Lord, he didn’t want to bring Emerson to him. What could the man possibly want? He shook away the horrific thought of the man finding out that Harry wasn’t dead and headed to the Albus’s office to give his report.

 He tiredly climbed the steps, holding onto the railing for dear life. He felt like his legs would give out any moment, and the last place he wanted to be was in the infirmary. For one, Harry needed him and two, Poppy hovered.

“Come in Severus,” Albus said wearily. He hated it when Severus came back from a meeting, but as much as he wanted the man to quite spying they needed every advantage they could get.

“Albus,” Severus said as a greeting before he slowly sat down in the chair.

“Tea,” Albus murmured handing him a cup.

Severus put the cup down, his hands shaking too much to hold it; much less drink it. He grimaced before taking a pepper up potion, this should give him enough strength to get to his lab and get the correct potions he needed.

“Let’s get this over with, you should have gone to your quarters first,” Albus said frowning. He hated the cruciatus curse with a passion, but Tom was known to use that one practically every time.

“My job first,” Severus replied before launching into the rundown of the meeting.

Albus didn’t agree, but he listened in, his thoughts getting bleak.

“He wants to meet Emerson?” Albus asked to clarify it.

“Yes, how do we get out of that?” Severus asked tightly.

“We don’t, that would make him suspicious.” Albus said rubbing his chin, as he started to think of a plan.

“What do you mean?” Severus asked cautiously.

“Have Emerson meet him,” Albus said simply.

“Are you out of your mind old man? In case you haven’t remembered Emerson is you know who,” Severus hissed out.

“I’m quite aware of who he is Severus, but just think about this,” Albus said lightly.

“No I will not allow him to be in harm’s way again, what would this do to him? What could you hope to possibly gain from this? He’s not even well; he’s barely hanging on as it is. This could break him,” Severus said shaking his head no.

“We’ll see, when are you supposed to bring him?” Albus asked, continuing on as if he didn’t even hear Severus speak.

“In a few days,” Severus replied tiredly.

“I have plan, trust me Severus,” Albus replied quietly.

 Severus shook his head in denial, this could only end badly. This plan wasn’t going to work and he didn’t want to lose Harry. He had felt a bit of that pain earlier this week, and he had no desire to relieve it, this time for good.

“If that is all, I will retire to my quarters,” Severus said wearily as he stood up with a wince.

“Of course Severus, feel free to floo,” Albus said handing him the powder.

“Thank you Albus,” Severus said grabbing some and heading to the fireplace.

~*~*~*Dungeons~*~*~*~

Blaise allowed her to cry for a while before he finally picked her up. He sighed softly, as he carried her to his Head of house’s chambers.

“It’ll me ok Mione, you’ll see,” he promised as he stood in front of the portrait. Knocking on it, he rubbed her back, as her cries turned into sniffles.

“How do know?” She asked hoarsely.

“Because it can only go up from here,” he replied quietly.

~*~*~Snape’s Quarters~*~*~

“Because I couldn’t face life anymore, it got too hard. It was too much pressure for just one person, everyone just refused to see it.” Harry replied with a shake of his head.

“What do you mean? What was too much pressure, the attention?” Remus asked in confusion.

“Yes and the constantly being told I’m a liar, and the fact that everyone expected me to save them. I’m only 15 years old,” Harry replied wearily.

“The attention was annoying you?” Sirius said in disbelief. “James would have relished in it, he would have thought of it like his own show.” He replied proudly, he himself wouldn’t have minded it either.

“I’m not James,” Harry replied quietly. “Never was, and never will be,” he murmured.

“I wasn’t saying you were James,” Sirius replied defensively.

“Yes you were, that’s all you see sometimes. But that’s ok, I can deal with being second best, I’ve never known any better,” he replied tiredly before standing suddenly as he heard the floo.

“Emerson what is…what are they doing here?” Severus asked as he landed in his chambers.

Severus stared hard at the Gryffindors sat in his quarters of all places. What was going on? When he had left Harry had seen a bit more rested and now he was looking harried. What had those two morons done to him? He stared darkly at Black, he really hated the man, and he had every reason too.

“They knocked on the door, a few minutes after you left. I didn’t know who they were until I opened it,” Harry replied with a tired shrug.

“What’s it to you Snivellous?” Sirius said with a glare of his own.

“Well you’re in my quarters, so I would say this is my business as well,” Severus said in a clipped tone.

Remus stood up as Sirius stood up, just in case Sirius needed to be held back if he tried to attack Snape. But before the tension could get any thicker, he heard a knock before the portrait was telling them there were two students at his door.

“Get them out of here Emerson,” Severus said before walking to the front to get the door.

Harry stared at his godfather and Remus before shaking his head.

“You guys have to go,” Harry said quietly.

“Why do we need to leave? We need to finish this talk,” Remus said with a frown.

But Harry couldn’t answer as he turned to see who was yelling in front of the flat.

~*~*~*Outside Snape’s quarters~*~*~*~

“Relax Mione,” Blaise repeated as he heard footsteps coming to open the door.

He had blanked his face and was holding her bridal style in his arms with her head resting on his shoulder. He took his own deep breath when the door opened in front of them, staring back at his teacher, his eyes giving away the emotion he was feeling. If Snape turned her away Blaise honestly didn’t know who he could turn too. He couldn’t go to McGonagall for obvious reasons and the Headmaster was basically useless to him.

“Mr. Zabini, how can I help you?” Severus asked, his eyes narrowing unconsciously as he took in the teens in front of him. He couldn’t for the life of him understand why his Slytherin was carrying Granger, who he could hear sniffling softly.

“Mione… can we come in?” He asked tiredly.

“No, now is not a good time,” Severus replied as he glanced behind him. He was hoping those two morons were gone.

Blaise turned his tearful eyes to the ceiling before shaking his head. “It’s an emergency.”

“How so, what seems to be the problem? Does this have anything to do with why you are carrying Granger?” Severus asked in a harsh tone.

He noticed the lion flinch at his tone, and that alarmed him. Though his words cut her, she had never shown such a visible reaction such as one like this. He was just barely able to hear her speak; which stilled him.

“I told you, I’m just a bloody Gryffindor. He can’t help me,” she hissed out.

“He can if he lets his prejudice go for one bloody minute,” Blaise said staring at Snape right in the eye. He could see the man’s anger in those dark eyes, but he wasn’t afraid of him in that moment. Mostly he was afraid of Hermione doing something worse to herself because Snape wouldn’t help her in the first place.

“What is it that I need to help you with Granger? I highly doubt it’s a homework assignment. If this about that A I gave you, you deserved it, I asked for 5 uses of phoenix tears not as many as you can think of. Did you honestly think that I would be pleased?” Severus said with an audible sigh, he just wasn’t in the mood today.

 He had a hard day not to mention it was still going. The pepper up potion was starting to wear off and he was feeling the extent of his injuries. The girl was just a perfect way to lash out at, his frustrations at everything. He forced himself to pull it back in; she was not to blame here. He could see something wasn’t right anyway; the only problem was he couldn’t assess it because his quarters were overrun with dummies.

“I’m done,” Hermione said swallowing down the lump in her throat as she wiggled herself down.

“No you’re not Mione, he just has to see them,” Blaise pleaded.

“Why, he’ll just accuse me of doing it for attention? Like he always told Harry? Oh but Harry’s dead now, so who the next’s victim on his list? Neville? Or me, the know –it-all Mudblood?” Hermione lashed out.

“What did I say about that word?” Blaise said loudly at the same time Snape spoke.

“Do not say such a word in my presence,” Severus said angrily.

“Why not; Draco Malfoy calls me that every day, and no ever cares. He’s called me it numerous times in your classroom; I can only assume that since he was never called out on it that you agree with him.” Hermione said with a shake of her head. Her anger was gone; it was only the hurt speaking out now.

“Mione stop,” Blaise said grabbing her hand tightly.

“It hurts Blaise, he’s supposed to help and only making it worse.” She confided.

“Its because he doesn’t understand,” Blaise murmured. “Make him understand,” he said firmly.

“How can I do that? He won’t even listen to me? How can I tell him if he won’t give me the chance to speak?” She asked reasonably, the tears falling once again.

“Show him,” Blaise said simply with a firm nod.

“What if he calls me a liar after he sees them?” She asked fearfully.

“Scars don’t lie,” Blaise replied softly as he touched her sleeve. “Can I?”

“Go for it,” she mumbled her head glancing at the stone floor.

Severus watched their conversation quietly; they were speaking as if he wasn’t there. It would have bothered him had he not gotten the ominous feeling that something was legitimately wrong with the girl. He wasn’t sure he wanted to see what she apparently needed to show him. He noticed vaguely that the noise level in his quarters were non-existent and wondered how Harry got them to leave.

“Ok,” he replied taking a breath before pulling back her sleeve and revealing the precise and identical lines going up and down the entire length of her arm.

Severus closed his eyes in disbelief, feeling like he had failed yet again. He knew what the red marks were, what type of instrument she had chosen to use as well.

“Miss Granger,” he said softly, for there was nothing left he could say at that time.

“Mione,” Blaise murmured poking her side softly.

Hermione looked up and sniffled wiping the falling tears from her face with her hands. She couldn’t look at her teacher she didn’t want to see the disappointment. She couldn’t handle it, so it was better to look at the floor then his face. She didn’t deserve to be judged here by him of all people.

“So can we come in?” Blaise asked, repeating the question from earlier.

“Of course,” Severus said quietly before opening the door to them. He watched as Blaise tug on her hand and basically lead her into the quarters, and into the sitting room area.

Severus sighed, as he closed the front door. His quarters were getting overrun with unstable teenagers. There was Harry, and Neville, and now Hermione, and Blaise. How did the latter fit into all of this? Who was he to her? He wasn’t even aware that they talked if he was being honest.

As he turned around he looked at Emerson who was staring at the two who just walked in with an unreadable expression on his face. Severus mused that it was like looking into a mirror, but without the nose. He didn’t like that he couldn’t read Harry’s every emotion anymore.

“How did you get rid of Black and Lupin?” Severus asked quietly as he stood with Harry by the door.

“I didn’t, they’re in your kitchen raiding the fridge,” Harry replied with a frown.

“They’re what?” Severus asked affronted at the whole thought.

“In the kitchen, they wouldn’t listen to me,” Harry said his frown deepening.

Severus was about to reply to that when speak of the devils, the two walked out of the sitting room. He could see Black startled as he realized there were now two extra people in there with them. This was boggling, especially considering that the mutt was supposed to be on the run. He could see his Slytherin glanced at the animagus for a second, his hold tightening on the girl before shaking his head.

“Is there any particular reason, why notorious mass murderer Sirius Black is standing in front of me in my Head of House’s quarters?” He asked as casually as one asks about the weather.

“Snuffles is here?” Hermione asked blankley before turning around to look at him in shock, before it turned to horror.

“What are you doing Sirius?” Harry yelled out finally after a moment of silence. “Remus get him out of here?”

Blaise was still reeling from the emotional day that consisted of Hermione and finding out what Draco had done, so he wasn’t fully there. At the moment, the man in front of him didn’t even matter. He turned his gaze to his Professor and sighed softly.

“So how are you going to help Mione?” He asked.

“Why would he need to help her? What wrong with her? You’d better not have done anything to her you slimy snake,” Sirius blurted out as Remus was grabbing the floo powder.

Blaise turned and looked at the other man in shock before blanking his face and scoffing.

“As if I would ever hurt Mione,” he replied his eyes narrowing.

“Yea, then what’s wrong with her huh?” Sirius said in disbelief. “Who else could possibly want to hurt her?”

“Her biggest enemy of course,” Blaise said tightly.

“And that’s who? That Malfoy snot?” Sirius said angrily.

“No, worse,” Blaise nearly whispered out.

“Who then?” Harry finally asked when it seemed like the Slytherin was hesitant to reply. He was concerned and genuinely curious now.

“Herself,” he answered matter-factly.