Severus Snape sat on the threadbare sofa at his home on Spinner's End, holding a photograph in one hand and a mug in the other. He looked hungrily at the picture as a sixteen year old red headed girl looked up and smiled at him, then waved.

Severus felt a sudden jolt as the Picture Lily looked up at him. He put the picture down with a sigh and took a sip of his drink. He hated this time of year, the school break. At least at Hogwarts he could keep himself occupied, even if it involved teaching a batch of dunderheads a science as fine and subtle as potions.

He sighed again,"Oh Lily how did my life come to this?" He shook his head, stood up and started pacing the living room. Then there was the arrogant Potter brat he had sworn to protect. He wished it did not have to be so difficult. Every time he looked at the boy a wave of mixed emotions surged through him. On one hand the pain and love he felt as Lily's emerald eyes shone, full of life. But then James chin, his hair, and his attitude would take over and Severus would develop a sense of loathing for the boy.

But even Severus had to admit, when Potter stepped into the great hall for the first time last year, it was not what he expected. The boy was too small and skinny for his age. He lacked the arrogant trademark James Potter strut. If anything he appeared shy and nervous. Severus however put those concerns to the back of his mind. When Potter landed into the Gryffindor Quidditch team after that foolish reckless stunt, he assured himself that Harry was just like his father, an attention seeking , foolish, arrogant. . . Just then a knock sounded and Severus paused his train of thought. Who would come to visit him? He lived a very solitary life and hardly anyone came to his house. He strode towards the front door, turned the handle, pulled. . .and fainted.

HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS HPSS

When he opened his eyes he found himself on the couch. Everything came flooding back to him. He had seen Lily. His Lily. On his doorstep.

"About time you got around. You look like you've seen a ghost."

And now he was hearing her voice. "I'm really losing it now," Snape muttered to himself.

"No you are not. I'm really here. Close your mouth Severus. Sheesh!"

"I ...you...me...how?" Severus finally managed to croak.

Lily sighed and sat down beside him.

"Is this really happening?" Severus's fingers closed around Lily's wrist as he felt the palpable warmth of her skin spread through his body.

"I was never dead Sev. Not really. I've been in a strange place. An intermediate between this world and the next. Death wouldn't take me through. It said my life was not complete; I had not done what I was meant to do. I did not understand then. I'm not even sure I do now. I had to spend ten years Sev, ten years. And I couldn't get out."

His throat dry, all Severus could manage was "hmm."

"I watched you from there. And I watched Harry . I never wanted either of you to end up like this. I'm so sorry!"

With that, she burst into tears. It was all Severus could do to keep his composure as he wrapped his arms around Lily, the faint sweet scent of her hair greeting him as he tried to comfort her.

"Lily...Lily…Please...Don't...It's alright. Why are you apologising? You did nothing wrong. You hear me. Nothing! I am the one who should be apologising. I never meant to call you that. I never meant to go down that road. I never forgave myself. I don't expect you to either, I..." he trailed off, lost for words.

It was then that Lily looked up into his eyes as emerald met obsidian.

"I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago Sev. It's time you do the same. I'm apologising because I put you in this state. I made your life miserable. I shunned you when I should have been there for you. I let you go down that road, turned away when you needed me the most."

Lily shook her head in remorse.

"How can you forgive me? I told him the prophecy, for Merlin's sake! I brought that on your family."

"You did not know it concerned us."

"That does not excuse my actions."

"No, it doesn't, but you did more to save us. "

"You would not have needed saving if—"

"No," Lily cut him off. "He was already after us. It would have happened even if you did not give him that piece of information."

"I should have done more."

"You did. You swore to protect my son. You saved his life during the Quidditch match Sev. I saw you. But his home life is a whole different story." Lily said the last sentence in a bitter tone.

"What do you mean?"

"You don't know?"

"He lives with your sister, correct? She has undoubtedly been fawning over your son. You are worried about him being spoilt?"
Severus flinched at the glare Lily was giving him. "They have been abusing my son! And no one did anything about it!"

She then got up, went to the corner where his pensieve lay, took out her wand and drew several silvery threads from her head and dumped them into the pensieve. Scowling fiercely, she took Severus by his arm and led him to the pensieve. "Come," she said. "Just watch."

The living room dissolved and a strange hallway appeared. In the memory, Lily was looking despondently out of a window.

"This was the place?"

Lily nodded. "Come, look from that window."

Lily led Severus to a window with gold frames. He gave a gasp of surprise as he saw a baby at the doorstep of Number 4 Privet Drive, wrapped in blankets, a letter under his arm.

A few moments later, Petunia opened the front door and shrieked. Both Lily and Severus winced .The scene dissolved. When it appeared again, Severus found himself looking through a different window, with a silver frame.

"This is another time frame. Harry is eight here," Lily answered his questioning gaze.

Severus looked out of the window and saw a tiny cupboard with a sort of cat flap attached. Petunia came, her lips pursed as she shoved a bit of dry bread through the flap.

"Harry is in there," Lily said, to which Severus's face turned white.

"Yes, my sister was not the most appropriate person to take care of my son."

"You could say that," said Snape dryly.

"Boy!" Vernon's voice thundered. "How dare you do that freakish stuff again?"

Vernon yanked open the cupboard door to reveal a terrified Harry with the dry piece of bread in his hands. "You don't deserve food, freak," Vernon exclaimed and took the bread out of the boy's hands.

"You ended up on the school roof and blamed Dudley for beating you. Oh, you are in big trouble now, boy."

"Please...please... I did not say anything about Dudley. I did not do anything...the wind...c-carried me up there... Please no. I'll be good."

"You should have defended Dudley! And you did some--thing--to get up there. Do not lie to me boy. It does not fare well!"

With that, Vernon slapped Harry hard across his face and the boy stumbled backwards and fell, his head hitting the floor. A couple of more smacks later, Vernon slammed the cupboard door shut, leaving a badly trembling Harry on the floor, with tears streaming down his face.

By this time, Severus looked positively nauseous. "I had no idea," he said weakly.

Lily looked at him a moment before saying, "Harry is not his father."

The scene dissolved again and this time a ten-year-old Harry came into view, weeding the garden. He looked tired and clearly dehydrated. He hesitated a moment before going into the house.

"Aunt Petunia, the garden is almost done. Can I please have a drink of water?"

"No. First get the job done. Then maybe I will let you have one glass."

With that, she shut the back door leaving Harry to complete the ominous chore.

Again, the scene dissolved.

This time, the Dursely living room came into view, adorned with a carefully decorated Christmas tree with many presents under it. Harry was making breakfast, while a fat chubby boy was making his way towards the Christmas tree.

"I want pancakes, not fried eggs, freak," he yelled at Harry.

"Too bad. That is what you are getting," Harry mumbled under his breath. Unfortunately, Dudley heard him. "Mum! Freak boy is saying he won't make my pancakes," Dudley yelled at the top of his lungs.

A few moments later, Petunia entered the room and took hold of Harry's hand. She shoved his thin fingers onto the stove ignoring his yelps of pain. She finally let go of his hand, taking no notice of his inflamed fingers. "That will teach you to do as you are told," she hissed. "Now make Dudley's pancakes."

"Yes Aunt Petunia"

Dudley was smirking the whole time. He then began to unwrap his presents. His face fell when he opened the last one. "Dad, I don't like my presents that much. Last year was way better."

Vernon chuckled and put down the newspaper. "Oh son, I was just like you when I was young! Don't worry, we will go to the store and get you what you want. How's that?" Dudley gave an affirmative grin.

He turned to Harry and said, "Forty presents for me, zippo for you."

Harry swallowed. "I wish you were here with me, Mum," he mumbled.

The scene cleared and Lily and Severus once again stood in the living room at Spinner's End. Severus stood aghast. He had never even imagined such a monstrosity-let alone to The Boy Who Lived.

"How could they?" was all he could say.

"My sister was always a prat," Lily spat. "I will have to visit her to repay her for her kindness, don't you think?"

Snape nodded looking grim. "I think I will join you on that visit."

"You did not help much in this regard did you? You treated the boy as if he were his father. You relished in humiliating the boy, my son."

"I did not know."

Lily huffed, "Well it does not matter now. Like I said, I forgive you. I know you care for Harry even if it is just because of me. However, I do hope it can grow into something more. I want you to love Harry for him, not for me."

"I doubt it Lily. Even if I do change my treatment of the boy, I don't think he will trust me, given my past interactions with him. He suspected me for wanting to kill him and stealing the stone last term for Merlin's sake!"

"What you don't know Sev," Lily said in a soft voice, leaning into him. "Harry has also inherited my – tendency, shall we say - of forgiving easily."

Severus cleared his throat. "Well, we'll see," he said awkwardly. "It is getting late. I will fix some dinner for us. You can stay in the guest room. I'll bring in fresh bed clothes and blankets later. Tomorrow we have to go see Dumbledore—I don't know how the wizarding world will react to this."

"I suppose you are right. I am supposed to be dead after all," Lily said with a small laugh.

"You don't know how glad I am that you are not."

"Trust me. I know."