What Now? by beargirl1393
Summary: Harry defeated Voldemort. He and Snape are both in the infirmary recovering. What will they do now that the wizarding world is once more against them?
Categories: Snape Equal Status to Harry > Comrades Snape and Harry, Teacher Snape > Trusted Mentor Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required)
Snape Flavour: None
Genres: Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Alternate Universe, Runaway
Takes Place: 8 - Post Hogwarts (young adult Harry), 8 - Pre Epilogue (adult Harry)
Warnings: Character Bashing, Neglect, Profanity, Violence
Prompts: No Longer
Challenges: No Longer
Series: None
Chapters: 7 Completed: Yes Word count: 8782 Read: 30908 Published: 17 Nov 2012 Updated: 02 Jun 2013
Story Notes:
Written for the No Longer challenge by Nightshadesydneylover150

1. What Now? by beargirl1393

2. Questions & Answers by beargirl1393

3. Family & Familiars by beargirl1393

4. Distractions by beargirl1393

5. Animagi by beargirl1393

6. Visiting by beargirl1393

7. Epilogue by beargirl1393

What Now? by beargirl1393

"You are no longer Dumbledore's Golden Boy, Potter. Now you are as 'plebian' and unfavored as my Slytherins and myself." Snape paused, "You will learn eventually that you no longer have the same privileges as you once did."

“Why?” Harry rasped, looking at the man clothed all in black sitting on the bed across from him.

Snape sighed, before standing and moving to sit on the edge of Harry’s bed. Pomfrey would have a fit, especially since the snake bites on his neck were still not completely healed, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. For so long, people had deluded this poor boy into believing that they cared about him, and now his little dream world had come crashing down.

“Because you have power, a lot of power,” Severus said, gently resting a hand on the boy’s blanket covered leg, “Because they fear that you will abuse your power, as so many have done before you.”

“But I won’t,” Harry protested, unable to believe what was going on. Why weren’t Ron and Hermione and Ginny up here visiting him? He’d nearly killed himself defeating Voldemort, was it too much to ask that his friends spare a thought for his wellbeing?

“They won’t believe you,” Severus calmly replied, easily anticipating what was running through Harry’s mind. Really, Potter is far too predictable. “You’re friends are worried that you will turn. Have you not wondered why, in the days that have passed since that final battle, I am the only one who you have seen? You and I are the only wounded who are outcasts, who are feared and mistrusted; I because of my past, you because of your power.”

“It’s been a week,” Harry sighed, leaning back against his pillows and closing his eyes, hoping once more that this was just a dream. Opening his eyes, Snape was still there. Damn. “What will I do now? If everyone hates me…”

“I would love to help you ponder that scenario Potter, but I will not be here much longer to help you,” Severus replied, rising to go back to his own bed. Really, he had no idea why he had chosen to attempt to comfort the boy in the first place. It had to be those eyes; Lily’s eyes. Wide open and innocent, as sad as Lily was the first time Petunia called her a freak. He looks do much younger, so lost now.

“What? Where are you going?” Harry asked, attempting to sit up. He was still severely drained from fighting Voldemort; his magic and energy levels had been down to nearly nothing. A week later and he was barely strong enough to sit up on his own, but both his strength and his magic were slowly returning.

“As soon as Poppy is able to heal my wounds, I plan on leaving the wizarding world all together. I have lived in the muggle world before, and it will be relatively easy to do so again.” Severus had no idea why he was telling the boy any of this, but he had to admit he was enjoying this a bit. It had been so long since someone had looked at him without fear, without resentment, and had actually seemed to want to talk to him. Severus was solitary by nature, but after so long it became tiring.

Harry bit his lip. Why did Snape leaving make him so upset? The man hated him, had always hated him, but he had also nearly died trying to save his life. Why? Why did he do it?

“Why?”

“Why what Potter?” Severus asked, slightly confused. What is that insufferable brat thinking now?

“Why did you save me? Why did you risk your life for me? Why are you being nice to me? Why are you going to leave?”  Questions poured out of him. Harry had only meant to ask one, but after that first one the rest rushed out, as if he was afraid the man would leave before he could find out the answers he wasn’t even sure he wanted to know.

Severus arched one fine, dark eyebrow. “Slow down Potter, I can only answer one question at a time. And, in return, you will answer a few questions of mine. Agreed?”

Harry only nodded. Snape was the only one who seemed to want anything to do with him anymore. What was he going to do after Snape left, if the whole wizarding world was out to get him?

“I promised your mother before she went into hiding that I would protect you to the best of my abilities. That is the reason that I nearly died for you in the Shrieking Shack; because my death would have saved your life. I have never truly hated you. I hated the fact that you looked exactly like your father, one of the many people who made my life hell. I also had an act to keep up if I wanted to continue to live when the Dark Lord returned. A Death Eater couldn’t be seen being kind to the boy-who-lived, not if they valued their life, which I did. And I am leaving because it is my best option. It will be simple enough to create a new life in the muggle world, only venturing into our world as needed and using glamours. Of course, the goblins at Gringotts would know who I am when I went to withdraw money from my account, but they will not tell anyone.” The answers rolled easily off his tongue. There was no point in lying to the boy at this point; what was the worst he could do?

Harry began to chew on his bottom lip again, thinking over everything Snape had told him. Of course, those answers only made more questions spring to mind, but he’d have to wait because it was Snape’s turn now. The man’s questions surprised him.

“Did your relatives abuse you? What do you plan to do now?” Snape’s last question was said slightly quieter, but made Harry’s eyes widen in surprise. “Do you want to come with me when I leave?”

The End.
Questions & Answers by beargirl1393
Author's Notes:
Abuse and neglect mentioned

“What…?” Harry began, but stopped at the slight scowl on Snape’s face.

“I believe we had a deal Mr. Potter,” Severus said, leaning back slightly as he waited for Harry to answer his questions.

“Fine,” Harry muttered, “But I want to know why you’d ask that.”

“Answer my questions and I will answer yours,” Severus replied neutrally. “There is nothing else for us to do here, so we may as well answer longstanding questions. It will help to pass the time if nothing else.”

“Ok,” Harry shrugged, resigning himself to the fact that he’d have to wait a bit for answers. “My relatives really didn’t abuse me. Occasionally Uncle Vernon would smack me around, or Aunt Petunia would try to hit me with something, but most times if I did something wrong I was just locked in my cupboard without food. Dudley liked to use me as a punching bag, if he could catch me.”

“Hm, similar occurrences with different circumstances,” Severus said, half to himself, as he thought back to days long ago when he hadn’t had proper food or clothing as well, although for different reasons.

“What do you mean by that sir?” Harry asked confusedly, not really expecting an answer. Guess I know what question I’ll be asking first when it’s my turn again. “I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do as soon as I can leave here. My friends don’t seem to want anything to do with me anymore; even Madame Pomfrey is afraid of me now. I always hated the attention that came from being the boy-who-lived, but even that was better than this. I hate that people are so afraid of me; it’s even worse than second year.”

“I still cannot believe those fools believed you were Dark simply because you are a parselmouth,” Severus replied, shaking his heads, “Most people would trade anything to be able to converse with their familiar, yet when they meet someone who possesses such a gift they treat them like a leper.”

Harry laughed for what felt like the first time in forever. “So I’m not the only one who thinks that? I couldn’t believe that they believed that I was letting some legendary beast loose in the school when I had never even heard of the Chamber in the first place.”

“The idiocy of people is astounding at times,” Severus readily agreed. In a softer voice, he added, “You haven’t answered my last question yet.”

Harry sighed, before looking at Severus once more. He was surprised at the fragile hope in the boy’s eyes, as though he couldn’t believe that Severus would want to be around him for any length of time. Considering our prior relationship and his past with his relatives, that probably isn’t too far off the mark.

“You’re the only one who’s ever treated me like a regular person, not some supposed savior.” Harry sighed. “They never really could make up their minds about me. Ever since I entered this world for the first time, everybody in it has fluctuated between falling at my feet in awe and cringing away from me in terror. Now, you’re still the only person treating me normally, even though it’s kind of abnormal for you. If I went with you, I know that I wouldn’t have to worry about you turning on me over something stupid. You’re the closest thing I have to a friend at the moment Professor, so yeah, I’d like to go with you when you leave; if you don’t mind that is.”

“It’s a sad day when your most hated professor is closest thing you have to a friend,” Severus remarked dryly, “About as sad as the student you swore would be the death of you a thousand times over is the closest thing you have had to a friend in more years than you would care to remember.”

“So we’re friends?” Harry asked, smiling slightly at the smirking Potions Master.

“Is that your next question Mr. Potter?” Severus had to admit that he was enjoying the light banter between them. How times change. I never would have believed that I would someday consider Potter a friend, yet that possibility is becoming more and more likely.

“One of them,” Harry replied, still smiling. “There are two others.”

“Ask then,” Severus said, shifting slightly to get more comfortable; the beds in the hospital wing were never truly comfortable.

“One was about what you said earlier, after I answered your question about the Dursleys. The other question was about where exactly in the muggle world we’d be headed.”

“I was planning on returning to my house in Spinner’s End,” Severus said, answering the easier of the two questions first, “It’s not much, but it has lasted me this long. There is a spare room that you could stay in.”

“And the other question sir?” Harry asked softly, noticing the subtle tightening of the man’s face.

“How much do you remember about what you viewed in my memories?” Severus asked, not wanting to prolong this branch of the conversation. He couldn’t lie; the boy had been honest even if he probably hadn’t wanted to remember his past, so Severus would simply have to grit his teeth and tell him.

“Um…You knew my mum when she was little…you made a tree branch hit Aunt Petunia when she  was mean to you,” Harry replied, grinning at that last part.

“I did, but that was not what I was referring to,” Severus sighed. I really should have suspected where the boy’s focus would have been, after all, he’d never seen his mother before other than in pictures.

“What’s this have to do with my question sir?” Harry asked confusedly.

“If you had remembered part of my conversation with Lily, I wouldn’t have had to explain in as much detail,” Severus said.

“Sorry sir,” Harry said, but the man just waved the apology away. He sat for a moment, as though gathering his resolve before he spoke.

“You mentioned not having enough to eat when you spoke of your relatives,” Severus finally said, closing his eyes as he spoke, “Which mirrored my own childhood in a way. My father was an alcoholic, a drunken bum as well. My mother had no real skills besides brewing, so she couldn’t get a job in the muggle world and was only occasionally able to get orders for potions. My father spent more time at the pub playing poker and drinking than he did working, and as such money was rather tight. I wore my father’s old clothing and was lucky to have one meal every two days.”

Harry gaped at Severus. He’s kidding, right? But as he thought about it, he remembered the baggy, overlarge clothing that the memory Snape had been wearing when he was talking to Lily about magic.

“He had a rather foul temper, and soon I learned how to hide in the shadows, waiting until my father had passed out drunk before venturing outside. Speaking to your mother was a welcome escape, but it had a cost, as everything does. If my father found out that I was speaking to her, then I would get a lashing with his belt.”

“Why? What did he have against you having friends?” Harry asked angrily. He’d had no idea how similar Snape’s past was to his, although he’d take time in his cupboard to a beating with a belt any day.

“Freaks don’t deserve friends,” Severus said, eyes still closed, “And in his mind I was a freak. I was a pale, skinny bookworm, and on top of that I had magic. Accidental magic was punished, as was acting in any way he disapproved of. He expected me to join sports teams, even though we had no money for such things. I was shy and quiet, and he wanted a son he could relate to. Subsequently, he tried to make me ‘normal’, in his eyes.”

“How long did he do that?” Harry asked, feeling sympathy for Severus. He had that at home, then Dad and Padfoot and the rat picking on him at Hogwarts. Merlin, no wonder he’s always so snarky.

“Until I was of age, when I no longer had to stay with him,” Severus replied, shuddering slightly, “I had just completed my Mastery, graduating on my eighteenth birthday, and I quickly got a job brewing for St. Mungo’s, opening my own mail order potions business so that I didn’t have to worry about money. Then, of course, you know what happened.”

Harry nodded. Severus had taken the Mark, joining the Death Eaters. Harry rapidly cast about for a way to change the tone of the conversation. “Um…It’s your turn to ask a question sir.”

Severus opened his eyes, looking at the boy on the bed across from him. He realized what Harry was doing and smiled slightly. Maybe they wouldn’t drive each other crazy after all.

The End.
Family & Familiars by beargirl1393

“What would you do now that you no longer have to play the hero?” Severus asked, glad to be away from the topic of his past.

“Well, Quidditch is the only thing I’m really good at and like doing,” Harry said thoughtfully, “But I really liked teaching the others in the DA.”

“Quidditch is out if you leave for the muggle world,” Severus said, “But you could always become a teacher. It would be easy enough to falsify records to prove that you went through the muggle school system, but you would have to work hard in the university to obtain the necessary degree. You would also need to decide what subject you would like to teach and what levels.”

Harry nodded. He hadn’t expected Snape to be so helpful, but he would need all the help he could get. “Can I call you Severus? It’s kind of weird calling you Professor Snape if you’re not acting like the dungeon bat.” Once he said that, Harry wished he hadn’t and braced for the worst, but he was surprised when Snape laughed.

“I suppose it would be acceptable, and I will attempt to address you by your given name as well. Do you have any ideas what you would want to teach?”

Harry thought for a moment. “Well, I’m really good art. It was one of my favorite classes in primary school. Also, no matter what my potions grade says, I’m really good at chemistry, so maybe I could go to school to teach that?”

“Or become a research chemist,” Severus said, smirking slightly, “That is where they would look for me, rather than you, if anyone bothers to look.”

Harry laughed a little at that. “I can see you being head of a research team and calling them dunderheads if their experiments fail. What do you plan to do?”

“While obtaining my Mastery, I had to take a rudimentary course of muggle first aid,” Severus said, stretching slightly, “And the course was interesting enough that I kept up with it in my free time. I’m a certified RN, so I will attempt to get a job at a muggle hospital. Previous employment will have to be faked, of course, but my experience is real enough.”

Harry looked shocked at that. “I never would have thought that you would be a doctor, or a nurse either.”

“My bedside manner does leave something to be desired,” Severus admitted, smirking, “But you would be surprised how well I can act.”

“I probably wouldn’t be too surprised,” Harry said, “Considering that you were able to trick Voldemort into thinking you were on his side since I was in nappies.”

“Fair enough,” the Potions Master replied. Both stopped talking as footsteps approached their room.

Madame Pomfrey bustled in, checking Severus’s bandages and running a diagnostic on Harry. Normally, she would chatter away while working on Harry, but she did everything in silence, summoning the needed potions and giving them to her patients. When she left, they began talking again.

“Even Madam Pomfrey acting differently now,” Harry sighed, lying back in the bed.

“Poppy has always treated me with suspicion, even more so after I killed the Headmaster,” Severus said, “This is nothing new.”

“At least you never had her fussing about leaving too early,” Harry said, trying to joke.

“Perhaps,” Severus said, smirking, “I’ve been told she can be quite ferocious where her patients’ welfare is concerned.”

“Didn’t you ever come here as a student? Like when my dad and Padfoot pranked you, or after the Shrieking Shack incident?” Harry asked.

“I was used to healing myself by the time I came here,” Severus said, “And I could find the counter charms for their spells in our schoolbooks.”

“Really? So you’ve never been to the infirmary till now?” Harry asked, incredulous.

“I believe it’s my turn to ask a question, but yes, this is the first time I’ve visited the infirmary for any reason other than checking up on someone or delivering potions,” Severus replied, conjuring a mirror so he could examine his healing wounds. That blasted snake was thorough. I should thank Longbottom for killing it, but he’s apparently as dense as the others. I’m surprised even Lovegood has stayed away. Pulling himself out of his musings, Severus asked, “Has no one attempted to talk to you since the battle?”

Harry shook his head sadly. “No one but you. I thought Hermione and Ron would be storming the Wing first thing, but even after Fred’s funeral no one came. Crap,” he said, realizing something, “Remus  and Tonks are dead. I have to look after Teddy, I promised I would.”

“I assume he would be with Mrs. Tonks for now,” Severus said, looking at the anxious teen. “It would probably be best if you write to her, explaining what is going on. If you wish, you can legally adopt the boy so that others can’t take him from you.”

“Why would they do that?” Harry asked, even though he had a pretty good idea.

“The same reason they are avoiding this ward,” Severus answered, echoing Harry’s thoughts.

“Do you have a quill and some ink?” Harry asked, looking around for parchment. Severus called one of the castle’s house elves, requesting a quill, ink, parchment, and a small lap desk for Harry.

After the elf delivered the materials, Harry wrote his note, explaining everything to Andromedea and asking if she wanted him to take custody of his godson. He wanted to spend time with the little boy anyway, but if she wanted to raise him, he wouldn’t stop her.  Before he could ask how he was going to send it, Severus called for his raven, Belladonna, to carry the letter for Harry.

“How’d you get a raven for a familiar?” Harry asked, settling back against his pillows as the raven flew away. It was getting later and he was tired. It seemed like forever ago that they had started this conversation, yet it had only been two hours.

“I wanted a bird familiar, so that I wouldn’t be dependent on the school owls to send letter, but I didn’t like any of the owls at the Emporium,” Severus said, summoning one of his books from his chambers. “Bella had been there for two years, and she wouldn’t even let the owner handle her. For some reason, she liked me, and she seemed intelligent enough, so I chose her for my new familiar.”

“I’m thinking of getting a new owl,” Harry said, yawning, “But I want to wait a bit longer. Hedwig was my first friend, and I still can’t believe that she’s gone.”

“That’s sensible,” Severus said, “But it might be best if you choose a completely different familiar. A cat perhaps, or simply a different species of owl.” When there was no response, Severus laid down his book and glanced at Harry, smirking as he noticed the raven-haired teen was sleeping. A wave of his wand covered him in a blanket to prevent chill, and Severus smiled as he picked up his book. One never knows what will happen next with Harry Potter.

The End.
End Notes:
I'm undecided on if Harry should adopt Teddy or not. He will have Severus to help him, but he is rather young to be raising a child. Thoughts?
Distractions by beargirl1393

Another week passed. Harry was able to walk around for about five minutes before he needed to sit down, but Severus assured him that he would be back to full strength soon. Severus’s wounds were finally healing, and were beginning to scab over. He knew they were going to scar, but figured that was better than the alternative.

They were sitting and talking after breakfast when Belladonna finally returned, a letter clenched in her beak. She flew to her master, alighting gracefully on his shoulder as she dropped the letter in his lap. Reaching up a hand to scratch her feathers, Severus murmured his thanks. A quick wave of his hand sent the letter to Harry, and he eagerly tore it open, reading his reply from Andromedea.

“She says that since Teddy is her only living relative, besides the Malfoys, she wants to raise Teddy,” Harry said, reading quickly. “She says that we’re both welcome to visit, and she thinks that future Dark Lord stuff is rubbish.”

“I would say that she got the brains in that family,” Severus said, smirking. He was happy that Andromedea wasn’t behaving as idiotically as a majority of the wizarding world. At least he has someone on his side, besides me that is. When did I become that boy’s bloody keeper?

“Guess so, considering how Narcissa and Bellatrix turned out,” Harry laughed. He was happy, unbelievably happy, that he would be able to have a good bond with his godson, regardless of the fact that he was leaving the wizarding world. Well, it’s not like its forever. We’ll probably have to go to Diagon Alley sometimes for stuff, especially if Severus does take a brewing job on the side; under an alias, of course.

“I suspect we know have a new first stop when we are finally able to leave this accursed infirmary?” Severus asked.

“Yeah,” Harry said, re-reading the letter. “Is that ok? I don’t know what’ll be going on after, so if I can see him now…”

“Then you won’t feel guilty if you cannot visit every day,” Severus finished, correctly guessing where Harry’s thoughts were headed.

“Yeah. Well, I wouldn’t visit every day anyway, more like every couple days. I don’t want to crowd them,” Harry said, summoning more parchment to write a reply. “Would Bella be able to deliver another letter?”

Severus looked at the raven, which was currently perched on the edge of his tray eating the remains of his toast. “I believe she will, if you let her finish her breakfast.”

Harry laughed. “It’s a good thing you were done with that toast.”

Severus smirked as he finished his tea. “Quite. You have no idea how obsessed she is with cinnamon toast.”

Harry wrote his letter while Severus summoned another book from his private library. Both were slowly going mad in their confinement, but they really had no other choice.

“I’d almost rather give Rita Skeeter an interview than stay in bed for another minute,” Harry sighed after Belladonna left with his letter. “At least that would give me something to do.”

“Indeed,” Severus said dryly, “Incinerating howlers is so interesting. I believe the Headmistress is having the elves destroy all of those, but if you would like to take care of them yourself…”

Harry laughed slightly, shaking his head. “I was actually thinking of the fact that I could remind her of the fact I can report her to the Ministry for being an unregistered Animangus and watch her reaction.”

“Skeeter is an Animangus? That explains how she was able to acquire some of her information,” Severus sad thoughtfully. “I wonder who taught her.”

“Do you have to be taught to learn to be an Animangus?” Harry asked curiously. He had thought about trying to become an Animangus since third year, when he’d learned about his dad and the Marauders, but he’d never had the time.

“In most cases yes,” Severus replied, looking up from his book. “I was able to teach myself from books, but most have a mentor to supervise their transformations and to help them.”

“You’re an Animangus? What do you turn into? When did you learn? Can you teach me, d’you think?”

Severus laughed. “I have previously stated that I can only answer one question at a time.” Harry blushed, causing Severus to smirk. “Yes, I am an Animangus. I will reveal my animal form once we are out of here. I learned soon after the Shrieking Shack incident in my sixth year. I was annoyed that your father and Black and that coward Pettigrew were able to master a spell that I hadn’t. Granted, I never had the time to attempt the spell as I was always brewing, but still.”

“How long did it take you?”

“One year. A majority of that time was spent researching, finding every book I could about Animangus transformations. It only took three attempts for me to transform, after I had a basic idea of what my animal form would be.”

“Three?” Harry asked, amazed. From what Sirius had said, mastering Animangus transformation was one of the most difficult magics imaginable, and Severus was able to do it after only three attempts?

“Yes, the first two times I only achieved partial transformation,” Severus admitted sheepishly. “I had a rather bad migraine; my eyes changed but the rest of me stayed human. Thank Merlin for headache relief potions.”

“Will you teach me?”

“You will not be able to attempt the transformation until you are released. You are still physically and magically exhausted.” Harry looked about to protest, but stopped when Severus continued. “I would suggest reading these books,” a wave of the hand made them appear on Harry’s bedside table, “to further you knowledge of Animagi. Forewarned is forearmed, and it is best to know what you are getting into. They also have tips on how to discover your Animangus form, so that your first attempt at transforming is easier.”

Harry nodded, conceding that Severus had a point, and picked up the first book in the stack to read. At least now he had something to do to pass the time, and another thing to look forward to when he was finally released.

The End.
End Notes:
Any ideas on Severus's animangus form?
Animagi by beargirl1393

Another week passed, and Harry and Severus were finally able to leave the hospital wing. Harry’s magic had returned to its normal levels, and while his strength hadn’t fully returned, it was nothing rest wouldn’t cure in a few days. Rest that would be gotten at Severus’s house in Spinner’s End, as he had been released as well, two days previously. He spent the time packing his possessions and transporting them to Spinner’s End, taking Harry’s things as well. The only thing he left were the Animagus books, which Harry continued to study.

He had no real idea how he was supposed to know what his animal form was, but he had the feeling that it was some kind of big cat. He idly flipped through an encyclopedia of creatures, both normal and magical, and lingered on the pictures of lions and tigers especially. Severus told him that it was likely that his form would be one of the two, something that apparently caused the man no end of amusement. Harry had put it down to the fact that he was a Gryffindor, and a lion animagus form would show that he was the epitome of Gryffindor, but once they reached Spinner’s End, he realized the real reason.


“Now, the first thing you will need to do is clear your mind,” Severus instructed his pupil. They were in the living room of his house at Spinner’s End. They were going to see Andromedea and Teddy tomorrow, while today was given over to Animagus studies.

“Good thing you made me practice Occlumency when we were in the hospital wing,” Harry said, smirking slightly before closing his eyes and concentrating. He didn’t think that the skill would ever come easily to him, and he would never be as good as Severus, but he was better than he had been.

“Yes,” Severus answered, “As the focus that comes with Occlumency makes assuming your Animagus form easier.”

“Will you tell me what yours is now?” Harry asked, a hint of pleading in his tone. He had been trying to think of possibilities since Snape had revealed that he was an Animagus, but nothing had seemed right.

“No,” Severus said, smirking as Harry’s face fell, “I’ll show you.”

As Harry grinned, Severus closed his eyes and concentrated. He fell forward onto all fours, stretching his forepaws out in front of him before standing straight. Black eyes, surrounded by black fur, stared at Harry as he gaped.

“A panther?” Harry breathed, looking at Severus wonderingly. He was larger than a normal panther, and the human intelligence shown out of the still coal black eyes. “Your eyes didn’t change.”

The panther huffed, vaguely disapproving, before suddenly turning back into Severus Snape.

“Of course my eyes changed Potter,” Severus said, rolling his eyes as though Harry was being unbelievably dense. “They remained the same color, that is all.”

“Why?” Harry asked, curious.

Severus shrugged. “I assume when you saw Skeeter as an Animagus, you noticed some defining feature that was similar to her appearance normally?”

Harry nodded. “Yeah, she had these markings, looked like her glasses.”

“It’s a characteristic that marks her as different from an ordinary bug, and distinguishes her from any other Animagi that have the same shape. There are relatively few Animagi so that is not a pressing concern, but it helps the Ministry keep track of Animagi.”

“So, your eye color is your characteristic?” Harry asked. It made an odd kind of sense to him, even though he knew Severus didn’t choose it. Severus’s eyes were different, part of what stood out about him. It made sense that they were his distinguishable characteristic when in animal form.

“Yes,” Severus said, shoving back the memory of showing Minerva, back when he was a student, that he had mastered Animagi transformation without instruction and after only three attempts. She had been so proud… That image was replaced with one of her screaming “Coward” as he fled the castle, making him flinch.

Harry noticed the flinch, though Severus concealed it. “What’s wrong Severus? You look…upset.”

Severus sighed. “It’s nothing. Memories, nothing more.”

“If it was nothing it wouldn’t matter,” Harry argued, “And it wouldn’t upset you.”

“It is nothing,” Severus repeated. “The past is the past, and nothing we do will change it.” No matter how much we wish otherwise.

Harry frowned. “There is something bothering you Severus, and don’t bother denying it. Before, I might have believed you, but there are very few things that make you look that upset.”

Severus sighed once again. Damn the boy for being so observant. I may as well tell him, otherwise I will get not peace. “Back when I attended Hogwarts,” Severus said, working to keep a level tone, “After I had master my transformation, I wanted to tell someone. Someone who would be proud of my achievements for once. I had quarreled with your mother, so she was not an option, and I had no other friends. I decided to trust someone who would appreciate the difficult magic, so I informed Minerva McGonagall of my success.”

“What did she say?” Harry asked, wondering what she could have said that would have affected Severus years later.

“She was thrilled, as none of her students, to her knowledge, had even attempted Animagi transformation, let alone accomplished it,” Severus replied, thinking back to the pride on his professor’s face. “It was recalling that memory which brought back a more recent one, when I was forced to flee the castle.”

Harry nodded, not needing Severus to say anything else. He knew what it felt like, having one of the few people you trusted turn on you, believing the worst even when you tried to tell them the truth. It was clear that McGonagall’s continued mistrust had hurt Severus.

“But, that is the past,” Severus said, forcibly shutting those memories out. “You are simply stalling so you don’t have to make your first attempt.”

Harry rolled his eyes, recognizing the none too subtle topic change but letting it go. Severus had already told him more than he really needed to; pressing for more information would make him close up. Shaking his head, he closed his eyes to help him focus. He thought of the pictures of the wild cats he had been looking at, their easy grace and power. Something shifted, and Harry felt his heart race with excitement. He opened his eyes to see, and was disappointed when the feeling stopped.

“You got distracted,” Severus said without prompting, indicating Harry’s right hand, or rather what used to be his right hand. In its place was a paw, slightly smaller than Severus’s as a panther, predominately orange with thick black claws. “You succeeded in partially transforming, but you were too distracted by the sensation to continue to focus, hence the partial transformation.”

“Is that what happened to you?” Harry asked, flexing his claws. It was weird to be able to say that, even weirder to be doing it.

“The first time,” Severus admitted. “The second failed attempt was because I was interrupted. The third time I managed to hide away from everyone long enough to transform without distractions.”

“You said you had no friends,” Harry pointed out.

“Friends are the only ones who bother you when you are trying to concentrate?”” Severus asked. “Quiet and focus on changing that back, then try again.”

Harry sighed but complied. Severus may not be as evil as he pretended to be, but he was still strict. That, a few months ago, would have been enough to make him swear to never let Severus teach him anything, but after spending more time with the man he realized that he was just as hard on himself, perhaps more so. Closing his eyes, Harry concentrated on reversing his partial transformation so he could try again.

The End.
Visiting by beargirl1393
Author's Notes:
I'm sorry it's been so long since I updated this. I've been uploading a few stories on Archive of Our Own and lost track of writing for the stories I have on here. I'm in the process of getting all of the sites I post stories on even. If you're still reading, thanks for continuing to do so during my unplanned hiatus. On a separate note, I'm thinking that there will only be one more chapter-the epilogue. Thoughts as to what should be included?

Harry made two more attempts before he successfully transformed fully.

“That was so cool!” Harry exclaimed after he had changed back. The tiger saw everything so differently than he did. It wasn’t afraid of anything, although it had been wary of Severus. He had been able to smell Severus, a mixture of human and animal and something that just screamed power.

“Yes, the first transformation is always rather enlightening,” Severus said, smirking. He was pleased that Harry had been able to master the transformation so quickly, and that his form was so similar to Severus’s own. It made instructing him much simpler than it would have been if Harry was a prey animal.

“It’s so odd,” Harry marveled, looking at his hands. They had been paws only a few minutes ago. “I love magic.”

“Doesn’t everyone?” Severus drawled as he headed for the kitchen.


After lunch Harry was set to visit Teddy.

“You could come, you know,” Harry said, striving for a casual tone as he finished his grilled cheese.

Severus simply raised an eyebrow as he took a sip of his water. His Why? came through loud and clear.

“I just meant, you could come, if you wanted,” Harry muttered, still not looking at Severus.

“Is there a particular reason that I should go?” Severus asked. He had an idea where this was going, but he wasn’t sure.

“No reason,” Harry said, looking out the window as he finished his sandwich. “I just thought, if you had nothing else to do…”

“I was planning on working on my resume,” Severus said carefully. Seeing Harry’s crestfallen look, he added, “Though I more than likely can finish that later.”

Harry smiled, looking up at Severus with bright eyes. “Yeah?”

“Yes,” Severus replied, taking his dishes to the sink. “Although I would like to know why it is imperative that I do go. You are a horrible liar Harry.” He expected the boy to refute that, but all Harry did was grin sheepishly.

“Yeah, I’ve been told that before,” Harry said, then sighed. “Teddy…I’ve never seen him in person before. Remus showed me a picture, before the battle, but…I always thought…”

“That when you were eventually able to meet your godson, his parents would be there,” Severus finished.

Harry nodded. “Yeah. I knew there was a war on, but I never thought, even with everything else that happened I never thought…”

Severus moved back to the table, clasping Harry’s shoulder briefly. “I understand Harry.”

Green eyes met black briefly. “Thanks,” Harry said quietly, looking down.

Severus nodded before turning and leaving the kitchen.


The visit went better than expected. Andromedea welcomed them warmly, and Teddy continued to change his hair and eye color between those of the two visitors throughout their stay. His favorite combination appeared to be Severus’s long black hair and Harry’s brilliantly green eyes.

Harry, for his part, loved visiting his godson. He was also grateful that Andromedea was caring for him. Teddy was adorable, but Harry didn’t think he’d be up to caring for him full time. Not this soon, especially not while he was going to college in the fall. Even with Severus’s help, Harry worried that he wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Still, he was glad that Andromedea didn’t buy into the whole ‘future Dark Lord and his devoted servant’ rubbish, which meant Harry could come visit again. Maybe he’d even be able to drag Severus along again.

Severus found Andromedea agreeable to talk to. She was intelligent, and had some talent in potions, ensuring that there was plenty for her to discuss with the former potions master. He also respected her for not turning on Harry like the rest of the sheep had.

“It’s ridiculous,” she exclaimed as they watched Harry playing with Teddy. “They groom the poor boy to be the Savior of the bloody Wizarding World, and then they turn on him when he actually manages it.”

“No one believed he would survive the battle,” Severus said bitterly. “They all believed that he would kill the Dark Lord and take himself out in the bargain. Even Dumbledore was unable to defeat the Dark Lord, so when a seventeen year old manages, everyone panics.”

“It’s still ridiculous.”

“It is, which is why I have no intention to venture into the Wizarding World much in the coming years.”

Andromedea nods, seeing the sense in that. After all, it’s not only Harry they’re targeting.

And that’s rubbish as well, she thought. That man risked his life spying on You-Know-Who, and everyone thinks that he will help train his successor? He’d rather kill himself, or I’ve misjudged Severus Snape.

All too soon, at least it seemed that way to Teddy, Harry and Severus were Apparating back to Spinner’s End. 


Severus started a fire in the fireplace while Harry made tea, and then they simply sat and enjoyed the quiet for a few minutes. Harry began to feel the effect of all the magic he had used that day creeping up on him. After his fifth yawn in as many minutes, Severus took the teacup from him and pointed toward the stairs.

“It’s late and you have to finish filling out your applications tomorrow,” Severus reminded the teenager.

Harry groaned at the thought of doing even more paperwork (honestly, making up his transcripts was hard enough), but obediently shuffled to bed. He looked back when he got to the top of the stairs, smiling as he saw Severus working on his resume as he finished his tea. The man expected a lot from Harry, but he held himself to the same standard. All in all, Harry could have picked a worse companion to run away from home with. But then again, Harry mused as he snuggled into his blankets, I didn’t really run away from home. I just adjusted my definition of what home is.

Right now, home was a house filled with books everywhere, a potions lab in the basement and a garden in the backyard, and with a snarky potions master who actually seemed to care about him. Life sure as hell can surprise you.

The End.
Epilogue by beargirl1393
Author's Notes:
Sorry for the wait between updates. I haven't had time to write much, then when I did finally have the time, I ended up writing either Sherlock, Sherlock Holmes, or Hobbit stories. Needless to say my AO3 and FF.net accounts were updated while this on had to wait for my muse to cooperate

The coming months were something of an adjustment for the both of them.

For Harry, his schooling had been through Hogwarts since he was eleven years old. Going to a muggle university would take some time to get used to, but he was already happy there. A haircut, with a small glamor to hide his scar and contacts instead of glasses changed his appearance slightly from that of the Savior of the Wizarding World. He enjoyed being just another student, not the Boy-Who-Lived, not the Chosen One, not the Savior of the Wizarding World… He was able to be just Harry, and he was enjoying that.

Severus, for his part, hadn't spent more than a few months each year in the muggle world since he graduated from Hogwarts. He had trained at muggle hospitals, and knew muggle medicine, but it was still disconcerting at first. What made it slightly harder to adjust was the fact that no one judged him on basis of his name. The name Severus Snape meant nothing to these muggles. No one knew that he had been a spy, that he had joined the Death Eaters as a teenager. He gained a reputation for being silent, sarcastic if bothered when busy, but with a dry wit. He would never be a social butterfly (Merlin forbid!) but he did have several acquaintances now, possibly friends.

Harry and Severus also needed to get used to living with each other. They took turns cooking and split the chores. Harry would usually do the shopping, as he had more patience with other people while Severus would take care of the dusting and sweeping. Harry learned not to bother Severus until after he had had his first cup of coffee in the morning, while Severus learned that Harry turned stubbornly petulant if he didn't sleep enough.

Both had nightmares, at first (who wouldn't, after what they went through). The first time Harry woke to the sound of Severus in the grip of a nightmare, the boy hadn't known what to do.


He started awake and grabbed his wand. He'd heard something, although he couldn't say what.

There. It sounded like…screams?

Slipping out of bed, Harry padded along the hallway, wand at the ready, searching for the noise. It took him a few minutes to realize that they were coming from Severus's room.

He slipped inside, the Stunning spell on his lips, when he realized that the room was empty, except for him and Severus. Severus, who was writhing on the bed. Severus, who was screaming.

"Stop, please. Don't hurt them. Not the children, please. No, they're burning. Stop! Stop you sick bastards!"

Harry wanted to put his hands over his ears and run away. He didn't want to know what those words meant, why he was begging for help too late. But he couldn't leave him there.

Screwing up his nerve (in case Severus was angry when he woke up), Harry cast Augamenti.

Severus shot upright as soon as the water touched him, wand in hand and pointing in Harry's direction.

"Severus, it's me, Harry," Harry said, holding up his hands.

"Harry?" Severus said, blinking sleep-fogged eyes and moving his wet hair out of his face. "Why am I soaking wet?"

"You were having a nightmare," Harry said, lowering his hands when he realized he wasn't in danger of being hexed. "It didn't seem smart to touch you; I do have some self-preservation you know."

Severus didn't laugh, but Harry didn't really expect him to. It took a lot to make him laugh on a good day, and waking up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare was definitely not the best time.

"What happened?" Harry asked after a few minutes, giving in to his curiosity. He expected to be snarled at, but Severus just sighed.

"Memories, nothing more," Severus said, running a hand through his hair. "I ordinarily place a silencing charm, in the event that I do have a nightmare."

"Do you have them often?" Harry asked, thinking of his own nightmares. He always used a silencing charm too, so that explained why neither of them had heard each other before.

"Occasionally," Severus replied, looking at the clock. Far too early to be awake, or too late, depending. "My time as a spy furnished me with some rather unpleasant memories."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Harry asked. He figured it was a lost cause but he had to try.

Severus shook his head, as Harry knew he would. "I will be fine. I have dealt with this on my own for many years Harry. It's late; go back to bed."

Harry bit his lip, then shook his head. He was asking to be hexed…but Snape had done so much for him so far. Now he had a chance to pay the man back a little. But first, he needed to get him to open up.

"I have nightmares, less than I used to, but they're still there," Harry said. "Basically they're about everything that I did turning out differently. If I didn't get the stone from Quirrel. If I didn't stop Riddle from killing Ginny. If I had died when the basilisk tried to kill me."

"The important thing is that none of that came to pass," Severus said, "You lived and defeated the madman and now the Wizarding World is safe from everything except their own idiocy."

Harry laughed at that. "Yeah…"

Severus sighed. Now Harry was waiting for him to confess. It went against everything he had ever done, but he decided he could trust Harry. The boy knew so many of his weaknesses that holding back this one would be laughable.

"They vary," he conceded, "But all revolve around my time with the Death Eaters. Tonight, it was a meeting a few months before your parents' deaths. I had already realized, after the first meeting actually, that I wanted nothing to do with them, but I couldn't get out then. I helped where I could, sending anonymous tips to the Order and sabotaging a few missions without being caught. One that I couldn't…"

Severus trailed off and Harry let him. He knew the other man would talk; he just needed time.

"We were sent to a muggle orphanage," Severus continued, and Harry could almost picture it as he spoke. "Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle, Nott, Rabastan, and I were sent on that mission. Malfoy cast the first Incendio, the others following moments later. They didn't notice that I didn't cast anything, but they would have noticed if I attempted to put out the flames. People began running out, and they began targeting the muggles directly. It was rather like a duck hunt, with flames instead of bullets. Children went up in flames in front of me, and I could do nothing to help them."


Harry had been shaken to discover the source of Severus's nightmare. He wasn't surprised that the things he had seen as a spy were the basis for nightmares, but he hadn't been prepared for the horrors that Severus had seen.

And he hasn't told me half of it, Harry thought ruefully. Said I had enough nightmares of my own. That night had set a precedent for them both though. They gradually stopped placing silencing charms and when one of them woke the other up, usually they would talk.


A year after the war ended, Severus was working at the local hospital and brewing potions for a small owl order business in his spare time. Harry was in college, studying to become an art teacher. He occasionally helped Severus with his potions business, brewing the easier potions under Severus's watchful gaze. He would never be the master Severus was, but at least he had stopped blowing up caldrons.

They continued to visit Andromedea and Teddy, Harry mostly visiting alone but occasionally dragging Severus with him. Harry loved playing with his godson, but remained happy that he had chosen to allow Andromedea to raise him. With his schoolwork and Severus's job, they would have never been able to take care of him.

The Wizarding World was still firm in their belief that the Chosen One and the Death Eater spy were going to take Voldemort's place, with Harry as Voldemort and Severus as his right hand. Howlers still came for the both of them, and they were used for target practice. None of Harry's friends had tried to contact him, either through Howlers or other means, and that frustrated him. He wasn't Dark, he wasn't going to go Dark, and Severus wasn't going to turn him Dark.

Aside from the continued stupidity of the Wizarding public, everything was falling into place in their lives. Neither had been in control of their own lives for so long, that they now enjoyed the freedom anonymity brought. They occasionally ventured into the Wizarding World, mostly for potions ingredients or the like, but they wore glamors or used Polyjuice. No one knew where Severus Snape and Harry Potter disappeared to, and the two men liked it that way.

Perhaps, in time, people would realize that neither of them were evil, but until that happened both of them were perfectly happy to stay mostly in the muggle world. Their new life was as close to perfect as they could get, and they both finally were able to relax and enjoy life, instead of worrying about wars and psychotic madmen.

Sometimes Harry looked back on his time in the Infirmary after the Final Battle. He nearly laughed each time, considering how things changed between then and now. Then, he was waiting for his friends to come after him, congratulating him and hanging out with him. Now, he had little faith that they would ever realize his (and Severus's) true loyalties, and he was fine with that. He was friends with the snarky bat of the dungeons who had terrorized him throughout school, and the man had turned into a fine mentor in both parts of his life, the magical and the muggle.

Neither Harry nor Severus would have expected their lives to turn out this way (especially since both fully expected to be dead before the war was over), but they really can't find a reason to complain. Peace and acceptance is all either wanted and now, enmity long forgotten, they have found it.

The End.


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