Sun streamed down on the wide open field that was currently covered in a variety of cloth booths. The International Wizarding Federation was sponsoring their first ever ‘Muggle Life Day’ with a variety of booths designed to show children how Muggle science inventions, like toasters and televisions worked. It had entertained the children for a while, but Harry wanted to go flying at the Weasley’s with Ron and the twins, both Michael and Grace were grumpy and in need of naps and Sirius was getting bored, which meant he was dangerously close to throwing a temper tantrum.

Lily and Arthur were supposed to come out and introduce the event, but neither of them had appeared yet.

“Daddy, I have to go to the bathroom,” Sirius whined, looking up at James.

“Alright, come on,” James said, taking the boy’s hand and walking off towards the tent near the stage that had the restrooms.

Michael, who had just learned to walk, was toddling ahead holding both Amelia and Harry’s hands and walking a snails pace.

“They’re so sweet with him,” said Pauline, boosting Grace further up on her hip as she smiled up at him and wrapped an arm around her waist. He kissed her on the tip of her nose was about to comment on the sheer perfection of the day, when there was a loud bang.

The stage several meters in front of them exploded, sending debris everywhere. Without really thinking, Severus grabbed Pauline with one hand and ducked, trying to cover both Pauline and Grace with his body at the same time.

“KIDS!” he screamed, looking to where Harry was staring, frozen in shock at the explosion with Michael crying in his arms and Amelia screaming beside him. Severus followed Harry’s eye-line. There was a huge fire roaring across the stage. Everyone was screaming and running. It was right where Sirius and James had gone.

He picked up Grace, who was screaming in fear, and ran them over to Harry and Michael.

“Are you ok?” Pauline asked, as Michael through himself into her legs. Harry nodded numbly. As she looked them over, Severus quickly ghosted his hand over Grace, making sure she had stayed clear of any injury.

“Is that where Daddy took Sirius?” Harry whispered. Severus exchanged a look with Polly.

“Take them home,” Severus said, putting Grace in her free arm. “Whatever happened might happen again. I’ll get James and Sirius.”

“Sev…” Pauline said, uncertain and tearful. She stopped at the look on Severus’ face. There was no argument.

He turned and ran opposite the crowd, towards the heat of the fire.

“JAMES? SIRIUS!” He yelled. The debris of the stage was everywhere, and Severus had to force himself to ignore the screams of other people. If James wasn’t hurt, he’d have found away to get Sirius away from the flames and hysteria.

“Severus,” Dumbledore was covered in soot everywhere but where his half-moon glasses still were perched on his nose. Thankfully, he looked unhurt as he kneeled by debris. Sirius, also soot covered, stood beside him crying.

Severus apparated the twenty feet to land right beside the sobbing boy.

“Are you hurt?” Severus asked hurriedly, roaming his eyes over the boy.

“My arm,” Sirius said through his tears.

“Let me see, love,” Severus said gently. The boy held out a clearly broken, bloody arm.

“Daddy pushed me and I fell, but …” he said through heaving sobs. Severus pulled the little boy towards him into a hug.

“It’s alright, we’ll fix you up, love,” he breathed. Even though he was sorry the boy was hurting, he was just relieved it wasn’t worse. The relief was short-lived, the moment he pulled Sirius towards him and was able to look over his shoulder, he saw what Dumbledore was doing.

He was in the process of levitating a large stone off of James’ chest. James was unconscious, covered in blood and the broken glass of his glasses. In a trance, Severus stumbled the few feet towards the stone, carrying Sirius without even realizing the boy was still crying.

James’ chest was still.

“Potter?” he whispered. Sirius started to turn around to look at the damage at the sound of Severus’ voice, and Severus quickly held the boy’s head to his shoulder so he wouldn’t see.

Dumbledore laid his hand on James’ chest and silver radiated out from his fingers as he pressed down hard over James’ heart. James convulsed in a painful looking arch, then crashed back to the hard ground. He sucked in a sickly, rattling breath and Severus gasped in relief.

“We need a Healer over here!” yelled Dumbledore. One of the many Healers that had apparated in ran over and fell to her knees beside James. She took one look at him, and apparated away, pulling James with her.

Severus stood up instantly and turned to Dumbledore. The man’s face was heavy and serious, which somehow brought home the horror of the situation more than James’ still chest did.

“I want Mommy,” Sirius sobbed into Severus’ neck and another pound of horror fell on Severus’ heart.

“Go,” Dumbledore said quietly “I’ll find her.” .Without further prompting, Severus turned around and apparated to the lobby of St. Mungos.

The lobby was in more disarray than usual. Injured bloody people and their loved one’s jostled for position. There were many ways Severus had become a better, more compassionate person over the past few years. But, he was forceful and intimidating and could get himself to the front of almost any crowd, and right now, there was nothing he wouldn’t do to get the little boy in his arms looked at.

He made sure Sirius’  arm sandwiched carefully between them to avoid it getting hit, and moved quickly through the crowd, pushing who he had to.

He grabbed the first nurse that approached.

“This child is hurt,” he said.

“What’s his injury?” she asked, harried.

“Broken arm.” she looked up at him a little incredulously. There were people with bleeding headwounds. “And Merlin knows what else. He was in an explosion, there could be internal injuries.”

“Did anything fall on you, pumpkin?” she asked Sirius, who had reluctantly turned his head out of the crook of Severus’ neck to look at her. He shook his head and explained about the push and the fall.

“I’m sorry, he’s low-priority,” she said, looking back to her clipboard. Severus was about to argue when another woman raced up.
 
“My daughter!” yelled a young blonde woman not much older than Severus. “She was brought in after the attack. Mildred White! Please.” The nurse waved her wand over her clipboard.

“I’m sorry, m’am,” the nurse said. “You’ll know something as soon as we do.”

“You’re number 67,” she said, handing him a blue beeper. Severus looked down at the clipboard on her arm.

“James Potter,” Severus said softly, “Is he..." Dead.

“What’s his status” he continued finding the words. The nurse waved her wand again.

“Potter, Potter…In surgery,” she said. Severus opened his his mouth to ask when he’d be out but she beat him to it. “We’ll let you know when he’s out.” Severus nodded curtly.

Between Lily and James, Severus was almost too anxious to sit, but he knew he had to remain calm for Sirius’ sake, so he found one of the few empty seats, and sat down heavily with Sirius on his lap.

“It’ll just be a little while longer, monkey,” Severus said when the boy whimpered and rubbed his arm.

“Here, I’ve got a story,” Severus said softly. He picked a grimy picture book off of the table and started to read.

He wasn’t thinking about he words. He was thinking about James on the operating table, or Lily god-knows where scared, injured or worse, and he didn’t notice Sirius was crying until the boy wound his good hand into Severus’ sweater and sniffed.

“I know it hurts, sweetheart,” Severus said, rubbing the tiny, shuddering back.

“Doesn’t hurt,” he said, defiantly. Severus conjured a napkin from the tip of his wand and gently wiped some of the tears, snot and soot of Sirius’ face.

“No? What’s wrong then?”

“Is Daddy, dead?” he whispered, his big green eyes searching Severus’ face. Severus’ stomach lurched, he had assumed the child was not perceptive enough to have noticed how injured James was.

“No, love,” he said with a forced reassuring smile.

“Is he hurt bad?” asked Sirius. There was no way he could lie to the boy, so he just nodded, unable to say the words. Sirius’ eyes filled.

Pauline joined him just as Sirius was brought into the exam room to have his arm healed. bringing with her the horrifying news that Lily was still missing. The day had been so stressful for the three-year old, that he had fallen asleep in Pauline’s lap mere minutes after the Healer fixed his arm.

“You should go take him home,” Severus said, as he ran a hand over the sleeping boy’s head. She was about to respond when the door opened and Healer Harris, who had long been a member of the Order and still took a special interest when one of them was injured, entered.

“Is he ok?” Severus asked urgently. He could tell before Healer Harris opened his mouth that it was not going to be good news.

“He has suffered severe trauma,” Healer Harris said. Pauline’s clammy hand tightened in Severus’ grip, and he felt his stomach turn.”He’s on a ventilator, and we’re doing what we can for him, but you should prepare yourself for the worst.”

Severus’ knees felt like jelly, and he sat heavily back into the chair.

“Are you positive?” Pauline whispered.

“No one can be positive, but with his injuries, I doubt he’ll make it through the night,” the Doctor said softly. “I’m very sor -” Severus had already let go of Pauline’s hand and whipped around to punch the wall. A very pleasing, painful sensation ran through his fingers.

“SEV!” Pauline called. Sirius jerked awake, met Severus’ wide, enraged eyes and shrunk back into Pauline’s arm. For her part, Pauline just scowled at Severus and rubbed the boy’s back.

“It’s ok, love. Uncle Sev just got upset,” Pauline said in her liquid honey voice that always managed to soothe Severus’ jangled nerves.

“Steve, would you mind if I had a word with my husband,” she asked, giving Severus a quelling look. Healer Harris - Steve - as he was apparently known to his wife nodded and looked down at Sirius.

“I’ve heard you’ve been very brave. Here, brave boys get lollipops. Would you like one?” Healer Harris asked kindly. Sirius looked at Pauline and nodded hesitantly when she gave him an encouraging smile.

“Let me see your hand,” Pauline said quietly when they left the room.

“I’m -”

“Show me your hand, this isn’t a discussion,” she snapped. Making sure to huff loudly in protest, Severus thrust his hand toward her.

“I think you broke two of your fingers. I’d heal it myself, but fingers are a little tricky with all the joints,” she muttered. She ran her hand gently over the swollen fingers.

“I don’t care,” he muttered petulantly, realizing full well that he sounded like a child. Her scowl deepened.

“You very well should,’ she hissed. “Do you realize that we are now responsible for four little people?”  Severus clenched his teeth and looked away. “And as much as I hope Lily is ok, it has been hours and…and it’s looking like there is a really huge chance that those four kids are going to be ours, forever.” Her lip twitched and her eyes filled, and Severus had a horrible thought.

“You don’t want them,” he said in a cold matter-of-fact tone. She stiffened and regarded him with equal coldness.

“That is not even close to what I am saying, you ass. I love those kids just the same as you. I’m saying, until we hear otherwise, we now have five children. The fact that you feel sad and angry has to come second.” Severus deflated slightly and looked away from Pauline.

“I’ll take Sirius home and stay with the kids, at least until Remus comes, alright?” she said, with a softer tone and a watery smile. Severus nodded tightly and she touched his cheek.

As soon as they left, he was taken to James’ small, private room.  James was hooked up to a ventilator, and blood was being magically pumped into him from a suspended ballon. Along with the cuts and bruises, his face looked like half-dryer paper mache. Not knowing what to do or what to say, Severus sat heavily in the plastic chair besides James’ bed, and didn’t move.

It seemed like minutes, though in reality it was hours, until Pauline returned, this time alone. Her usual bubbly smile was gone, and horror crossed her face when she looked over James,

“Oh Jamie,” Pauline breathed, racing to his bedside. She quickly sat by James’ bed and started to fuss over him: straightening his blankets, stroking his hair, whispering calming platitudes he couldn’t hear.

James didn’t respond, and somehow the non-responsiveness was the worst. After everything, his last conversation with the man would have been about…god he didn’t even remember what.

“Harry knows something is wrong, so does Millie. They’re both too smart for their own good,” she said after a moment. “How do we explain this to them?”

“They should all have a chance to say goodbye,” he whispered. Pauline looked up and nodded her lip trembling. Severus took a step towards her and kissed her firmly on the forehead.

“I’ll bring the kids,” Severus said, looking over to James’ still body.

“No,” Pauline said shaking her head. “No. We need to tell them together.” Severus swallowed and nodded tightly. For better or worse they were a family. A fucked-up, patched together family that had potentially just lost two of their happiest, strongest members.

“Remus should be here soon, we’ll go then,” Severus said softly, trying not to think too hard about how he was going to tell four children that they were never going to their parents again.

Remus, sooty from lifting rubble, came all too quickly.

“Any word about Lily?” Severus asked the second he entered the room. Remus shook his head.

“Nothing about Arthur, either. Dumbledore thinks it’s possible they might have been kidnapped,” Remus said. “Everyone’s looking.” Severus nodded, that assuaged his guilt somewhat.

“How’s he doing?” Remus asked softly, easing himself to the chair beside James’ bed. Severus looked away and Remus nodded in understanding. Pursing his lips, he leaned forward and gently brushed the bangs off James’ forehead.

“Hey buddy, it’s Remus.” James didn’t respond. “I’m right here.”  Remus took James’ hand and watched every laboured breath intently. Severus knew there was no need to tell the man not to leave him.  

“Come on, Paul,” Severus said reaching his hand out to her. “Let’s go.”

Kids, Severus quickly found out, were a little odd with bad news. Sirius and Grace bounced back almost immediately, unable to truly comprehend what was happening,  Amelia clung to her teddy bear and watched everyone with wide-eyed wariness, and Harry just kept talking about all the things he was going to do with James when he got better. By the time they got to the hospital room, Severus felt a deep wariness as he realized he could barely handle seeing James again.

“He’s going to look a little different,” Severus said, kneeling in front of them. “He’s hooked up to machines to help him get better, and he’s sleeping.” They had figured it was best to prepare them. All four of them nodded their understanding, even though they looked even more wary than before.

“Alright then,” Severus said, throwing one last uncertain look at Pauline before opening the door.  

James looked even more gaunt and pale before, and Remus was sitting in the chair with his head in his hands. He looked up and forced a smile when he saw the children.

“Hello darlings,” he said softly. The children entered hesitantly, and approached the bed in silence. It was like they were walking to a casket. The thought of that was too much to bear, so Severus busied himself with picking Grace up.

“Can he hear us?” Amelia whispered, as she slowly reached out and touched James’ hand.

“I think so, pet,” Pauline said as she wrapped an arm around Amelia. Sirius leaned against Severus’ leg and he pulled the boy closer.

“Daddy,” whispered Harry, pulling at James’ forearm. James almost always gave his children the attention they demanded, and the fact that he would continue to remain unconscious when Harry was asking for him was unthinkable to the little boy.

“When’s he going to wake up?” Harry asked, looking directly at Severus. Remus looked up to the ceiling and blinked a few times.

“We don’t know, Hare-bear,” Severus said softly. Harry blinked a little dazed, then looked at James with an oddly mature, blank look on his face. Before Severus could say anything, Sirius burst out into tears, pressing his face into Severus’ thigh.

“What if he doesn’t wake up?” Harry whispered. “And what if you can’t find Mom?” Severus awkwardly knelt down in front of the boy so he could hold Sirius was one hand and take Harry’s hand with the other.

“You would stay with us, love,” he whispered.

“We wouldn’t have to live in an orphanage like in the stories?” Amelia whispered. Severus ran a ran through his hair, trying to hold on to the last of his emotions and failing desperately.

“No, lovey. You always have a home with us, ok? Always,” Pauline said, thankfully saving Severus from having to speak. Harry started to cry now, beginning to truly understand the seriousness of James’ injuries, and Pauline took him and Amelia into her arms.

“And you always have a home with me too, darlings. You have so many people who love you,” Remus said, stroking Sirius’ hair as the boy started to reach inconsolable.

“It’s my fault,” Sirius said when Severus wiped the tears off of his cheek. Severus’ heart torked at the pained, guilty look on the little boy’s face. James, Severus knew, would never forgive him if he allowed Sirius to continue to believe that.

“No, no it’s not, Sirius,” Severus said sternly.

“But I had to go to the bathroom, and he pushed me. But if he didn’t push me out of the way he’d be awake,” Sirius said through his sobs. Grace confidently raised a hand to Sirius’ face.

“Don’t be sad,” she said. “Daddy will wake up in the morning.”

Severus didn’t know how to respond that, so he just pulled Sirius into a hug.

“It’s not your fault, love. It was someone else’s fault. The person who made the rock fall in the first place, and I know your Daddy, he would push you out of the way every single time.” Sirius looked up at him uncertainty.

Suddenly a patronus, shaped like a phoenix soared through the room.

“We found Lily,” it said in Dumbledore’s voice. “She’s on a lot of potions, she’ll be out the rest of the night, but she’s fine.”

The moment of good news felt like cool water on a hot day, until Severus realized one of them was going to have to tell her that her husband was dying.

“I’ll go,” Remus said quickly, getting to his feet. “Maybe she can come before…” He broke off looking down at the children.

“Can we see Mom?” Harry said quickly. The other children looked hopefully up at Pauline and Severus. They had a mother again. The relief made Severus a little dizzy.

“If we’re allowed to, we’ll go first thing tomorrow, I promise,” Pauline said “But now, you and your Mom need rest. Why don’t you all give Daddy a kiss goodnight?”

Harry leaned over and kissed his father softly on the head and stroked his hair, exactly the same way James would comfort one of his sick children. Amelia imitated Harry.

“Can I give Daddy my teddy?” Amelia asked Pauline softly after she finished.

“I’d think he’d like that,” Pauline replied gently tucking the bear under James’ arm. She lifted both Grace and Sirius up so they could give him a kiss.
 
“You should get some sleep too, honey,” said Pauline softly, kissing Severus on the cheek.

“He’s not dying alone, Paul,” Severus whispered.

“I’m still holding out hope that he’s not dying at all,” she said in his ear so the kids couldn’t hear.

Pauline looked down at James and stroked his errant hair back. After a moment, she kissed him softly on the forehead.

Hours later, James groaned and shuffled in his sleep.

“Is he in pain?” Severus whispered from the chair he hadn’t moved from since the children left. The nurse shook her head and pressed her hand to James’ damp forehead.

“No, his fever’s coming down,” she said.

“That’s good right?” Severus asked sitting forward and straightening James’ covers. She nodded again, and her fingers ghosted over his shoulders as she left the room. Alone again, Severus took James’ clammy, papery hand in his and continued to watch the chest artificially inflate up and down. James shifted uncomfortably.

“You’re ok,” Severus muttered. For the first time, James’ head lolled towards Severus’ voice.

Sometime after whispering platitudes and continually rearranging James’ covers, the exhaustion and tiredness of the past day pulled Severus to sleep. He awoke abruptly an hour later to the harsh sound of choking and rasping and the beeping of alarm. Severus was just able to encode James, lying on the bed looking like he was having a seizure when a group of Healers came in.

“What’s happening?” demanded Severus.

“Get him out of here,” Healer Harris demanded as he bent over and started to wave his wand over James. There was too much fear and numbness for Severus to protest so he allowed the nurse to pull him outside and began to pace frantically back and forth in front of the door. After a moment, Healer Harris opened the door.

“He’s breathing on his own,” Healer Harris said immediately, “He was fighting the intubation.”

“W-What does that mean. Is he going to be ok?” Severus asked hurriedly.

“I don’t want to get your hopes up,” Healer Harris said seriously, turning back to where James lay on the bed. “But his vital signs are improving, his temperature is almost normal. His pulse is nice and strong. It’s exceptional. The next few hours are critical, but if he keeps improving at this rate, I think he has a chance.” Severus wiped his mouth with his long fingers and stepped back into James’ room. A large, blue oxygen bubble rested where the intubation tube had been, and James’ grey skin was flecked with sweat. Discomfort radiated off every fibre of his body.

“Excuse me, I have other patients,” Healer Harris said, tapping Severus gently on the arm before heading out the door. It was ridiculous to Severus that other patients existed, that people had concerns outside of James and Lily.  He sat back down and picked up the copy of Moby Dick he had grabbed off of James’ side-table and started to read.

“The sea had jeeringly kept his finite body up, but drowned the infinite of his soul. Not drowned entirely, though. Rather carried down alive to wondrous depths, where strange shapes of the unwarped primal world glided to and fro before his passive eyes; and the miser-merman, Wisdom, revealed his hoarded heaps; and among the joyous, heartless, ever-juvenile eternities, Pip saw…” Severus sighed hours later and looked from the book to James. “How do you read this crap, Potter?”

James’ brow furrowed at Severus’ voice, and he turned towards Severus with a groan. He eyelids fluttered, the very beginning of consciousness. Severus’ stomach dropped to the bottom of his gut. Severus swallowed thickly and squeezed James’ shoulder.

“James,” whispered Severus .It looked like it took an obscene amount of effort, but James’ eyes cracked open to reveal confused, pain-filled hazel eyes.

“Jamie,” Severus breathed, not even remotely embarrassed at the heavy emotion in his voice. James frowned and reached a shaky hand up to the blue oxygen bubble that covered his mouth.

“No, no, leave that,” Severus said, taking James’ hand in his and bringing it back down to the bed.

 “You’re going to be ok. You’re at St. Mungo’s” said Severus gently off of James’ confused look.

“Siri’s?” James slurred.

“He’s fine. Lily’s fine. Everyone is fine,” said Severus, pressing the button for a nurse. Fine was perhaps an exaggeration, but James didn’t need the extra stress. James closed his eyes in relief, then forced them back open.

“Mr. Potter,” Healer Harris said coming in with a genuine smile. “You gave us all quite a scare.” Severus moved from the bed and watched with tense anticipation as the Healer examined James. After a few moments he nodded in approval.

“It looks good,” he said pulling Severus into the corner. “He’s still in critical condition, but this should be the worst of it.” Severus nearly fainted in relief.

A plaintive moan came from the bed as James shifted uncomfortably and grabbed at the covers.

“Sev?” James whispered. Severus nodded to the Healer and raced back to the bed to grab James’ hand.
“Hey, I’m sorry. I’m right here,” Severus said. Some of the anxiety on James’ face smoothed out, and he nodded.

“Don’go, ok?” he whispered, clutching Severus’ hand with the little strength he had left.

“I’m right here. I’m not going to go anywhere,” Severus said, trying to soothe the prickle of fear he could see in James’ eyes.

“Look, Millie gave you her teddy,” Severus brought the teddy bear down from where it rested under James’ arm to his hand. Convulsively, James squeezed the bear’s head with an attempt at a smile, before opening his mouth to try and speak again.

“Don’t. Just rest right now, alright?” Severus soothed, pulling James’ covers up more securely around his shoulders. James nodded and blinked at him tiredly.

“I thought I told you to try and stay alive,” Severus said with a tense smile. James was only half-conscious, his eyes opened in little slits, and his breathing slow and laboured under the mask, but his lips curved slightly upwards at the comment.

Severus leaned forward to rest his elbows on his thighs and dropped his head into his hands so that his forehead was almost resting on the hospital bed. He had his fill of close calls for a lifetime, and he couldn’t get over the image of seeing James completely still without his chest rising and falling on his own.

A deep sob rose up through Severus, then another and another until he was crying with pathetic exuberant relief into the duvet. After a moment, a hand landed clumsily on top of his head. James was attempting to comfort him, after everything that had happened this week, James was attempting to comfort him. James was too exhausted and sick to continue patting Severus’ hair, but his hand rested there, warm, comforting, and alive as Severus sobbed.

XXXXxxxXXXX

The only thing worse than watching James almost die, was dealing with him while he recovered. Yappy lap dogs had less energy and after a month out of the hospital, he was almost impossible to keep still. Lily was the only person he listened to, but she hadn’t been able to get out of a Muggle Protection conference in Texas and Polly was at the bakery with both Grace and Michael, so Severus was stuck trying to keep James healthy all by himself, which was a rather Herculean task. It was six in the morning when Severus could hear the tell-tale signs of cooking and scrambling around the kitchen.

With a heavy sigh, Severus got out of bed and walked into the kitchen. Sirius was running circles around the table chasing a flying airplane, Harry was organizing his new school supplies at the table, and James, stupid, reckless James, was holding Amelia on his hip while flipping sausages on a frying pan.

“You’re supposed to be lying down,” Severus said when he stepped into the kitchen.

“Lying down?” James said with a broad smile. “It’s Millie’s first day at school, I had to make some pancakes.” His face was pale and his jaw was set with pain but the smile he beamed at Amelia was genuine. Scowling, Severus walked over and plucked Amelia out of the other man’s arms.

“Sit down.” Severus seethed in his most intimidating voice. James relented, and all but collapsed in the chair. His lung capacity was still extremely limited, his muscles weak from all the time in the hospital, and he wasn’t supposed do anything that exerted himself, let alone chase after 5 children.

“Told you you weren’t supposed to,” said Harry from the table.  With a thin scowl, Severus finished flipping the pancakes, and sent them all soaring to the table with an angry crash. They ate in stoney silence that was only intermittently broken up by Sirius asking questions.

“Get ready for school,” Severus said curtly to Harry and Amelia as soon as they were finished. Amelia looked at him with her perfected, baleful look, and he immediately felt guilty. This was her first day of school, Lily was sick she couldn’t be there, Severus had a responsibility to not make the entire experience horrible for her.

“Do you want some help, love?” he asked gently. She shook her head negatively and followed Harry up the stairs.

“You’re meant to be resting,” Severus said to James irritably as he sent a pile of dishes to the sink.

“Not tired,” James replied, unconvincingly. Severus scoffed and summoned a clean shirt and a pair of trousers for Sirius and quickly changed the boy.

“You should listen to him,” Sirius whispered.

“Hey, whose side are you on?” Potter said playfully. Severus was about to continue his lecture when James broke out into a fit of loud, wet coughs. They were completely normal according to the Healer, but every time he heard them Severus could feel all the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

“Potter?” Severus said worriedly, summoning him a glass of water. “Come, drink this.” James waved him off mid-cough.

“‘m ok” he sputtered unconvincingly, forcing a smile for a chalk-white Sirius. “Honey, it’s ok.”

“Go get your coat, love,” Severus said. The moment the child obeyed Severus turned back to James and pressed a hand to his forehead.

“Daddy?” Amelia said worriedly. She was wearing a pretty blue jumper, with the ties hanging down, and a white collared shirt. James smiled gently at her.

“Wow, look how grown-up you look, pet,” James said. “Come here, let me look at you.” Amelia crossed the kitchen, still regarding her father with wary eyes. When she approached James turned her around to tie up her sash and immediately started coughing again.

“Daddy, are you ok?” she asked softly. James tied the sash of the jumper in a neat bow around her waist then turned her back around to face him.

“I’m fine, sweetheart. Just a cough, nothing to worry about, alright?” He bobbed her on the nose, and she smiled uncertainly back at him.

“Are you excited for school?” he asked kindly. She looked down, and James observed her carefully. After a moment she reluctantly nodded yes.

“Good. It’s ok to be nervous too, you know,” James pressed, clearly picking up on the little girl’s hesitancy. Amelia raised her eyes to meet his and shrugged.

“Why can’t you teach me?” she asked, barely at a whisper. James sighed and pulled her on to her lap, ignoring the warning look Severus sent to him.

“Well, I don't know as much as your teacher does,” James explained, moving her long, dark hair behind her ear.

“What about Uncle Sev? You know everything,” Amelia said eagerly looking up to Severus. He couldn't help but smile slightly at the child.

“He’ll teach you when you’re a little bigger,” said James gently. “Why do you want us to teach you?” Amelia shrugged, but curled further into her father’s arms.

“What if noone likes me?” she whispered after a moment. “What if I’m stupid?” Amelia was the type of child to fret over everything. At James’ bedside she was the most observant, the most concerned, and Severus knew both James and Lily were already concerned about her being so anxious at so young an age.

“Well, I already know you aren’t stupid,” James said reasonably. “And I already know that people like you. Ginny and Harry will be there, you can play with them at lunch if you want.” This seemed to mollify Amelia somewhat and she nodded.

“Why don’t you go on and get your backpack,” James said giving her a gentle push. She nodded and ran back up the stairs to her room. “Tell your brother to hurry up!”

“I’m coming with you,” James said suddenly.

“No you’re not,” Severus said, just as insistently.

“Sev, you're a father. Your kid starts talking about how they think they’re going to be stupid and have no friends, you go with them,” James said fiercely crossing his arms.

“You can sit on the couch and wait for me to tell you that she was fine,” Severus said. Eventually, after much argument and James repeatedly telling Harry to look out for his sister, Severus and the children shoved themselves into the fireplace and, after a few minutes of uncomfortable jerking, landed at the school foyer.

They dropped Harry off first, with absolutely no drama. He gave Severus a quick hug, then gleefully ran over to where Ron and Ernie were colouring.

Amelia was a little more troublesome. By the time they left Harry in grade two, her eyes were swimming with tears and the moment they got to the kindergarten, errant tears continually escaped and she sniffed loudly. With a heavy sigh, Severus kneeled down in front of her, balancing Sirius on his knee.

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly, wiping away the freshest tears. She started to cry a little harder, which started to upset Sirius and he drew them both into a fairly awkward hug.

“It’s alright, love,” he whispered, kissing her on the head. “You’re going to have a lot of fun, and I won’t go until you’re ready, ok?” She pulled away and nodded, jutting her chin out a little defiantly.

“Come,” he said holding his hand out for her. She hesitated for a moment. “It’s ok.” Reluctantly, she took it and allowed Severus to lead her into the bright, loud kindergarten class. He introduced her to the teacher, a rather friendly, plump woman named Mrs. Burnstrom, then quickly pointed out the large stack of books at the back of the class. This overcame her shyness and she excitedly pulled Severus and Sirius to where the stack of books were.

Another girl was sitting there and looked up from her book as they approached. She had slightly unkempt blonde curly hair and grey eyes that observed them warily as they approached. Her own school uniform was identical to Amelia’s, but different in that it was clearly second-hand and not well-mended. In short, she looked exactly how Severus got sent to school. Many of the other children’s parents were milling around but this girl was all alone. Severus felt a sharp pang of sympathy for her.

“Say hello,” Severus whispered to Amelia as he let Sirius down to play with some discarded blocks.

“Hi,” Amelia whispered softly. “I’m Amelia.”

“Claire.” the other girl said. Both children observed each other, uncertain what to do next.

“Go find a book, love,” Severus said to Amelia who happily complied. She brought him some story about a big red dog - the day Severus never had to read another children’s book would be the best day of his life - and he obediently started reading it. Half-way through, he noticed that Claire was watching them from over top of her own book. The book was upside down, so she clearly couldn’t read and was trying to surreptitiously listen in on Clifford’s adventures.

“Would you like to look at the pictures?” Severus asked her. Her eyes widened, like she though she was being rebuked for listening, but when no punishment followed, she gave a small nod.

“Come here then,” she slid over to look at them, and Severus continued the story. When he finished it, other parents were starting to leave and Severus could tell the teacher was getting ready to transition to more structured activities.

“Do you like to colour?” Amelia asked Claire unexpectedly. After a moment’s hesitation, Claire nodded.

“Come on,” with an assertiveness more suited to Sirius, Harry or even Grace, Amelia took the girl by the hand and led her to the nearest table. Soon the two children were scribbling and laughing, and Severus felt an odd sort of heaviness in his heart. It seemed like yesterday she had taken her first steps.

“They grow up so fast don’t they,” Severus said grabbing Sirius and tickling him.

“You’re not going to grow up that fast, are you?” Sirius just continued to laugh madly, as Severus tickled him.

“Come on, let’s say goodbye to your sister,” Severus said picking up the boy and carrying him over to where Amelia was colouring.

“We’re going to go now ok, love?” Severus said gently. Her head snapped up and she looked at him with big eyes, bordering on distraught.

“It’s ok,” he soothed. “If you need me, I’ll come back. I promise.” He cupped her cheek and she nodded bravely, maintaining her stiff upper lip.

“That’s my girl.” He kissed her on the forehead, then left quickly, not wanting to draw out the separation. He nodded to the teacher and headed to the front door then, when neither Amelia nor the teacher were watching him, he slipped into the cubbies where he could watch Amelia play undetected.

She looked up for him, as though she had never really expected him to leave, and started to cry, which made Severus want to run back to the table and reassure her that all was well, but he resisted.

“Uncle Sev,” whispered Sirius. “Uncle Sev, Millie’s sad.”

“Shhh,” Severus said immediately. Uncharacteristically, Sirius obeyed and Severus continued to watch. Claire pushed more crayons in Amelia’s direction in an attempt to calm her, and soon the teacher came over to attempt to soothe her. One agonizing minute passed, then another, and another, and the tears were still flowing. Severus was just about to go over there when James’ voice hissed at him.

“Well go to her!” Severus nearly jumped out of his skin, and James’ head popped out from under his infernal invisibility cloak. A rage Severus hadn’t felt in a very long time swept through him. Sirius laughed in delight, still at the age where invisibility was amusing and not creepy.

“Look how upset she is. I’m going over there,” James said, shrugging off the cloak. His face was grey, and he was partially hunched over.

“Did you apparate?” Severus asked, absolutely livid. James had the audacity to throw him a charming, devil-may-care smile and shrug.

“Do you know how dangerous that is in your condition?” Severus hissed. “You aren’t even meant to be out of bed.”

“I had to make sure she was ok,” James said nodding over to where Amelia was still crying. The second he did, he dissolved into a horrid coughing fit that left him gasping for breath.

“Sit, sit,” Severus said, conjuring a chair, all anger momentarily forgotten. The coughing went on for so long that Severus was legitimately worried he was going to pass out, and Sirius was starting to get upset.

“Potter, relax,” Severus muttered, rubbing his back. “Take a deep breath.” James struggled to follow his instructions, but soon caught his breath somewhat and even though he looked like a sweaty mess, his eyes were able to focus on Severus’. He pressed his fingers to James’ throat.

“Your pulse is racing,” Severus muttered in disapproval after a moment. James grit his teeth in annoyance and scowled back at Severus.

“Just check on my daughter, alright? I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine!” Severus exploded, resisting the urge to slap James across the face. “Your heart is racing at 160 beats per minute, you’re starting to get a fever, your lungs are in an extremely fragile state, you keep pushing it like this, and you’re dead.” Severus was so involved in his rant, that he hadn’t noticed Sirius start to cry, but James had and he glared at Severus before turning to his son.

“Oh shhhh, lovey it’s ok,” James said opening his arms. “Uncle Sev didn’t mean that, ok? He was just worried, come here.” Sirius threw himself dramatically against James’ chest and started to cry.

Severus immediately felt a rush of guilt. Sirius had seem James’ dying body, and of all the children he was the one who truly understood how close he had come to losing his father. He had not meant to devastate the child all over again.

“Your Dad is right, monkey. I’m sorry,” said Severus softly, kneeling down in front of the child. James held Sirius tighter, but Severus could clearly see the tight lines of pain on the man’s face. He could tell that James was hurt when he allowed Severus to pull Sirius off of him.

“Is it your stomach that hurts?” Severus asked finally, softening ever so slightly. James nodded shortly, then threw a playful wink in Sirius’ direction to try and reassure the boy. Without preamble, Severus knelt down and lifted James’ shirt, fine red lines were appearing where the Healers had magically healed the deep wounds on James’ midsection.

“James,” Severus hissed, half as an indictment, half in sympathy. “Come on, home.”

Severus picked up Sirius with one arm and pressed a kiss to his temple.

“See monkey, he just needs some rest. It’s all ok,” he said softly, helping James to his feet with his other hand.
 
“Millie?” James ground out before they could disapparate.

“Honestly, James?” Severus spat.

“She’s so shy. I’m not shy. I don’t - I just want to make sure she’s ok,” James said hissing as a spasm of pain hit him.

“Daddy, if you want, I can go play with Mille. I’ll even play Barbie,” whispered Sirius conspiratorially.

Severus peered out from the cubbyhole relieved to find that Amelia was now happily scribbling and chatting with Claire.

“Alright, everyone, she’s fine. She made a friend,” Severus said. There was a flicker of a smile on James’ face and he nodded his approval, even though he was still doubled over and looking like unfinished paper mache.

“Home,” Severus said sternly. “Now.” He grabbed James’ wrist and apparated them through the air, feeling a large pang of sympathy for the man who was not supposed to be doing anything remotely strenuous.

Sure enough By the time they landed at the Potter estate, James was flagging fast, and he stumbled hard when they landed in the living room. Quickly, Severus put Sirius down and grabbed James around the waist to prevent him from face-planting onto the wood floor.

“Sirius, go play,” Severus said shortly as James’ knees started to give out.

“I wanna help,” Sirius said.

“Uh - ok monkey go grab a blanket then, alright,” Severus said wanting to get the boy out of the room before James collapsed. Sirius obeyed quickly.

“Alright,” Severus said the moment Sirius left. “It’s alright, Jamie. Come on.” James groaned in response. There was no way James was going to make it up the stairs, so Severus quickly dragged him to the living room couch and dumped him down without ceremony.

“I’m fine,” muttered James unconvincingly.

“Of course you are,” Severus snarled. The man was absolutely insufferable.

“I gotta -” groaned James.

“You don’t have to do anything,” Severus said angrily, pushing James onto the couch and lighting the fireplace with his wand. “Lily is going to pick Millie up. For once, you need to stay still! Stay there” There wasn’t much more that James could do beside lie in a miserable heap on the couch anyways, but Severus was sure he’d try.

He walked into the kitchen, summoned a pain-relieving potion and dumped the entire container into a glass of water. Severus walked back into the room to find James struggling to sit up. With a sigh of frustration, Severus strode across the room and pushed him back on the couch.

“Do you ever do what you’re told?” grumbled Severus. James doubled over and started to cough loudly. Severus jaw tightened with worry and after a moment’s hesitation he gently rested a hand between James’ heaving shoulders.

“Come now, it’s alright,” he said with a touch more hostility than James would have. “Drink this.” Before James could protest Severus forced the cup up to his lips and tilted it so that James was forced to drink it in a good few gulps.

With as much gentleness as he could muster under his irritation, Severus pulled James’ feet up on to the couch and pushed him back onto the pillows.

“I’m fine. I don’t need -”

“Shut up,” snapped Severus, pulling a blanket over James’ with a sharp yank.  

“You’re a really mean nurse, d’ya know that?” James asked starting his hacking cough again.

“I know,” Severus said, slithering his hand up James’ head and sliding another pillow underneath him. There was a thin layer of sweat on the man’s face and when Severus pressed his fingers to the inside of James’ neck, his pulse throbbed far too insistently. He gave James a sour look of displeasure, which was returned with such a defeated, bleary-eyed look that Severus couldn’t very well get mad at him. James blinked up owlishly at him, the drugs clearly taking effect.

Sirius came running back into the room holding his firetruck-covered blanket.

“Here you go, Daddy,” Sirius said gently.

“Thank you, love,” James muttered as Severus took the blanket and spread it over him. Sirius looked over his father critically.

“Alright go play,” whispered Severus "I'll be there soon." Sirius looked at him hesitantly but went to the playroom.

“You put something in my drink, didn’t you?” James slurred accusingly as he fought to keep his eyes open. Severus smirked.

“I did,” Severus said, reaching out and checking James’ pulse again. It had returned to a much more languid, satisfactory pace, his breathing had slowed, and despite James’ best efforts, his eyes were fluttering shut.  

“Thank you,” whispered James, so softly Severus almost missed it. Any remaining frustration dissipated at the thought of how much pain James must have been in for him to be thanking Severus for drugging him. Severus nodded, and feeling an unwonted swell of sentimentality, squeezed James’ shoulder in commiseration.

“It’s alright, Potter. You just need some rest.” Severus said softly extinguishing the gas lamps in the living room with a quick flick of his wand. He had planned to leave right away, but lingered until James’ breathing deepened into a slow, reassuring rhythm.  

XXXXX

“Sirius, honey, how many times have I told you, you can only play Gobstones with one set or this happens,” James was saying to Sirius just as Severus stepped out of the fireplace into the kitchen.

The five-year old was sitting on the counter completely covered in goop that James was patiently siphoning off.

“Hi Uncle Sev,” he said brightly.

“Hey monkey,” Sirius said, trying not to laugh at the goo-covered child.

“Is it 7:30 already?” James asked looking at his watch. Severus nodded.

“Daddy I’m hungry!” Grace said, running into the kitchen and grabbing James around the leg.

“Alright, new plan,” James said taking Sirius off of the counter and kneeling in front of both children.

“Go up to the playroom and play whatever you want and leave Daddy alone for ten minutes,” James said.

“Even Harry’s toys?” Sirius whispered conspiratorially.

“Yes, even Harry’s toys. Though if I were you I wouldn’t advertise that to him,” James said handing some crackers to Grace.  Sirius smiled and grabbed Grace’s hand running towards the playroom with excited whoops.

“Your finest parenting moment,” Severus said with a snicker as the feet ran towards the playroom.

“Lily is going to be home in five minutes, so she can deal their lovely, grubby little fingers. She didn’t get to see the kids much this week so she is not coming with us tonight. You know that means?” James said gleefully. Severus blinked back at him.

“Polly is with Michael at her Aunt and Uncles. Lily is with the kids. We can do whatever we want!” James said. “A night of no responsibilities. We are going to go out, have way too much to drink and say nothing about our little darlings,” James said with a smile. A night with no responsibilities. These days, that was like finding a unicorn in a Muggle forest. Theoretically possible, but mostly the product of naive fantasy.

“We could drop in on Remus,” James said.

“Unannounced,” Severus said skeptically. “Have we not learned our lesson?” Last time they did that, they ended up apparating into the middle of Remus’ living room while he was having a threesome. It was an image Severus was sure he’d never recover from.

“Point well taken, but can we at least manage the good pub in London? We need some fun,” James said a little desperately.

They did go to the good pub, loud without being obnoxious, and snagged two chairs by a roaring fireplace. They did not mention the children once, and were currently loudly debating Fantasy Quidditch.

“That’s your problem, Potter. Your too loyal,” said Severus with a laugh. “Gaulbunkin is getting old.”

“If not wanting to trade a Seeker who has brought home 3 conference championships in the past 7 years is stupid, than I don’t want to be smart,” James said, taking a large swig of his beer.

“And that attitude is why I always…” Severus trailed off. There was a very familiar-looking, curly-haired body slouched over one of the chairs at the bar. Severus jumped to his feet and strode over purposefully, leaving James so stare after him in confusion.

“Mr. Klein, what in the world do you think you are doing?” Severus said, staring down at his fifth-year student who looked up guiltily.

“Uh-oh,” James said with an amused laugh. “Busted!”

“Er…hello Professor Snape,” he said bashfully.

“You are a smart boy Jason, so I am assuming you know that you are underage,” Severus said.

“It’s winter break, technically, you don’t have to do anything,” Jason said with a hopeful little smirk.

“Jason, we have known each other for five years now, what can possibly make you think that I wouldn’t do anything,” Severus said, crossing his arms.

“Potter, I’m afraid I have some Hogwarts business to take care of,” Severus said motioning for Jason to get up. So much for their night of no responsibility.

“So official!” James said with a wide, bright smile. “I’ll come. We’ll start our night of no responsibilities after, yeah?”

Severus nodded and walked Jason out of the bar.

“There is a reason for the drinking age Jason. You could have been mugged. You could have been arrested,” Severus said as they walked down the street to Jason’s house.

“Oh Sev, be nice. It’s Christmas,” James said, smiling a little at the student. Severus rolled his eyes, the two were exceptionally similar.

“I’m sure he’ll be in enough trouble as it,” James said. Jason snorted a little at that.
They arrived at a block of cement row houses, older and slightly run down. Jason saw Severus looking at the houses and blushed a little.

“I can go in myself,” he muttered. Severus sighed and nodded towards the door.

“Let’s go, Jason. It’ll be alright,” he said.

Reluctantly, Jason walked up the path to the door, flanked by Severus and James, and knocked.

A thin woman with equally curly hair opened the door. She barely looked surprised.

“Jay?” she said. “Are you the police?” she asked turning to Severus and James.

“No. I’m Professor Snape, Jason’s professor,” he said. Surprisingly, she smiled.

“Oh Professor Snape, Jason’s told me so much about you!” she said, shaking his hand earnestly. He smiled back, trying not smirk when he noticed Jason was blushing.

“Well, I found him…out. I just wanted to bring him home for you,” he said softly. Now that the child was home, there was no need for sanctimony. Jason was a good kid, and he certainly wouldn’t have been the first underage student to sneak out to a bar.

“Oh dear,” she said, the smile vanishing off of her face.

“Mary, what’s going on,” a loud male voice said. Her face paled in a way that suddenly reminded Severus of his mother.

“Nothing, just -”

“In trouble again?” the man said to Jason who stared at the ground. “Get upstairs.” Without another word, Jason obeyed.

“Thank you,” Mary whispered, shutting the door in their face. Severus nodded.

“Poor kid. I remember when my Dad caught Sirius and I drinking his Firewhiskey. I think he screamed at us for like an hour,” James said with a laugh. “I think he was more mad that he was out of Firewhiskey to be honest.”

Severus frowned at the wall, barely listening to James. He could hear the sounds of raised voices coming from within the house.

“Severus?” James asked, moving to walk down the stairs. Severus just shook his head and stared at the door. There was a cracking sound that Severus knew all to well. He pushed open the door.

“Sev?” whispered James. “What the fu-“

“Shhh,” hissed Severus in response.
 
Severus crept up the stairs, followed by James.

“Ungrateful piece of shit,” said a voice lowly. There was a loud smack followed by a muffled scream. Severus paused, inwardly debating how to approach the scenario, but James, who never had much foresight ran past Severus and threw the door open, making Severus’ decision for him.

Jason was shirtless with his hands braced against the wall. His father was standing behind him with his belt raised.

“Get off of him!” James said, running over and tackling the man.

“Jason!” Severus said quickly running over to the boy and pulling him back from where James was rolling around on the ground with Jason’s father. James punched him hard on the face then pointed his wand at him.

“Get up,” James snarled, flicking his wand at the man’s wrist.

“Get out of my house!” the man said. James shot him a look of pure loathing just as Mary ran into the bedroom. All four adults stared at each other, uncertain how to proceed.

“Jason, let’s go” Severus said softly. The boy looked at him with wide, surprised eyed and nodded numbly. “Come on, it’s ok. Come with me.” Severus took of his clock and wrapped around the boy’s shoulders and led him out of the room, trusting James to keep the parents upstairs.

“I don’t feel so good,” whispered Jason the second they got outside. The blood drained from his face. Quickly, Severus whipped out a bowl and held it in front of the boy’s mouth. He puked violently, his shoulders still shaking. As soon as he was done, Severus conjured a water glass and filled it from the tip of his wand.

“Sorry,” whispered Jason as he took the water.

“That’s alright,”  soothed Severus, feeling bad that the boy was apologizing for anything

“We’re going to take you to St. Mungo’s, get you all fixed up,” Severus said gently. This was meant to comfort the boy, but it didn’t. He snapped his head up and looked at Severus a little desperately.

“No, no I’m fine. Please, I don’t need the hospital,” he said. The night and the alcohol had clearly made a jangle of the poor child’s nerves, and he looked on the verge of tears. Severus looked up at James, who had just exited the house, a little desperately. James cleared his throat and knelt down in front of the boy.

“Alright, how about you come to my house with Professor Snape. We can get a Healer to look at you there,” James said. So much for James’ night of no responsibilities, Severus though a little wryly.

“I-I don’t need a Healer, and I can stay here,” Jason said defiantly.

“You know there is no way I can leave you here, and even if I could I wouldn’t,” said Severus. Jason looked up at him sharply but resignation came over his handsome features. They floo’d quickly to the Potter’s house.

“There you guys are. I was beginning to get worried,” Lily said from where she was scribbling notes in front of an open file folder. She looked up at them with a smile, then froze when she saw Jason standing between them. Jason blushed and looked back to the ground.

“Lily, this is one of my students, Jason,” Severus said. She blinked once in surprise, then smiled.

“Hi, I’m Lily, James’ wife,” she said, extending her hand to Jason. The boy shook it, bashfully.

“Are you hungry? We have lots of left-overs,” she asked. Jason shook her head. “Are you sure? It’s no trouble.” Jason hesitated and Lily smiled broadly.

“Alright, I’ll send some food up with Professor Snape,” she said.

“Come on, we’ll get you set up upstairs,” James said, gently directing the boy out of the kitchen the stairwell. As soon as they were out of earshot, Lily turned to Severus with raised eyebrows.

“Explain,” she said. After he finished explaining the situation with Jason’s parents, Healer Harris arrived, and Severus left Lily in the kitchen with her head stuck the fireplace, brow-beating Child Protective Services, to bring the him up to Jason’s room.

James was laughing with the boy who was lying stretched out on the bed. Severus could see the scars and welts from were he stood in the doorway and winced inwardly.

“Hey, the Healer’s here. I’ll leave you be,” James said before smiling down at the boy. “The bathroom is two doors down the hall. Help yourself to any food or anything else you need, and Lily and I are right at the end of the hallway if you need us, ok?”

“Yes, sir. Thank you,” Jason said, observing the Healer as James left.

“Alright, let’s take a look here,” Healer Harris muttered, his customary no-nonsense approach in place. Severus pulled the chair up beside the boys head and smiled at him when he looked up warily.

“I’m sorry about all this,” he whispered, hissing when the Healer started to spread and anti-septic potion on the newest lashes.

“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Severus said seriously. The boy nodded weakly, his chin starting to tremble.

“What’s going to happen to me now?” he whispered after a few moments.

“Well, we’re going to have to work that out together,” Severus said gently. “But I promise no one is ever going to hurt you like this again.”

The Healer hit a particularly sore spot and Jason flinched and let out a little yelp.

“Almost done,” said Healer Harris kindly. Severus reached out and rested a hand on the boy’s head.

“Has your Dad been doing this for a while?” Severus asked softy. Jason swallowed thickly then looked away.

“For as long as I can remember,” he whispered after a moment. Severus nodded, about to respond when he felt a pair of eyes on him. He frowned and turned around to see to small green eyes watching him from behind wire-rimmed glasses. The second Severus turned around, the door shut.

“And does he hit your mother as well?” Severus asked, turning his attention back to the boy in front of him. He shook his head.

“Just me,” he whispered, a tear sliding down his cheek.

“Oh kid, it’s not your fault. It’s not about you,” Severus whispered, taking the boy’s hand. After a moment, the boy squeezed back and started to cry in earnest.

It had been a long day for Jason and the alcohol, pain-reliever and stress had knocked him out almost as soon as Healer Harris was finished. Despite the late hour, there was another child Severus knew without a doubt would still be awake.

He opened the door to Harry’s bright, blue room and walked inside. The light was off and Harry was tucked in under the covers, but his fake snores were unconvincing to someone who had seen him sleep many a night, and his glasses were still on his face.

With a smirk, Severus sat down and gently pulled the glasses off of the boy’s face.

“If you want to fake sleep, you should take your glasses off,” Severus said, putting them on the side table. Harry kept his eyes shut and tried valiantly to hide in a smile, but was unable to.

“How much did you hear?” Severus asked, pushing the boy’s fringe back off of his head. Harry opened his green eyes to look at Severus, and Severus lit the nightlight with a flick of his wand.

“Did his Dad really do that do him?” Harry whispered. Severus sighed.

“That’s Jason’s private business, Harry,” Severus said seriously. “It’s not polite to listen in. You wouldn’t feel good if someone listened in on one of our private conversations, would you?”

Harry shook his head guiltily and looked down.

“But why would his Dad do that?” Harry asked. There was no point in trying to brush this off.

“Ok. Shuffle over,” Severus said with a sigh as he squeezed himself on to the bed to sit beside Harry and wrap an arm around him.

“There are a lot of reasons, sometimes parents get overwhelmed, or they don’t know how to talk about their feelings, or they get upset, and some people just aren’t meant to be parents,” Severus said softly. “It’s hard to explain.”

Harry nodded sagely.

“Is Jason going to be ok?” he whispered. Harry had seen Jason more than a few times at Hogwarts, and Severus could see the genuine concern on his face.

“Yes, he’s going to be ok,” Severus said.

“Dad says it’s wrong to hit kids,” Harry said seriously. “He says it can make them think that they aren’t loved for their whole life. Is that true?”

“Sometimes, but a lot of the time kids who were hit grow up to find people who love them, and have their own family, and they feel loved again,” Severus said, wanting to soften the harsh reality of the world for the 8-year old in front of him. Harry looked at him intently for a moment.

“Did your Dad hit you?” Harry asked in a tentative whisper. Severus blinked at the boy for a moment.

“A very long time ago,” he said in as light of a tone as he could manage.

“But now you have a family and I love you, and Amelia loves you, and Gracie and Sirius and my Mom and Dad and Auntie Polly and Mike and Uncle Remus and Dumbledore and even the Weasleys, so you don’t feel unworthy anymore, right?” Harry asked innocently. Severus cleared his throat, it had never been laid bare quite like that before.

“Right,” he said, not knowing if it was true. “Now, it’s very late, snuggle down,” Severus said, getting out of the bed and tucking the blankets around Harry’s shoulders as the boy shuffled down obediently.

“Goodnight monkey, I love you,” Severus said, planting a gentle kiss on the boy’s forehead.

“I love you too,” Harry said before yawning and turning onto his side. Severus smiled down at the child then tiptoed out of the room.

He softly closed the door to Harry’s room and leaned back against the door. He had always identified as being slightly miserable and he hadn’t even really considered that he was happy and content until Harry had said it so bluntly. He could not put a finger on why it made him feel so fragile, but it did.

“Daddy!” yelled Grace from the bedroom across the hall. “Daddy, I’m thirsty!”

Severus straightened up from the wall and was about to get Grace a glass of water when the door to the Master bedroom opened, and a bleary-eyed, shirtless James shuffled across the floor, shrugging on his housecoat and yawning.

He blinked in shock at Severus, the tiredness and his lack of glasses making it harder to process.

“What are you still doing up?” he asked finally. “Is Jason alright?”

“He’s asleep. I was just having a chat with Harry about domestic abuse,” Severus responded.

“Oh,” said James. “I usually just read him Lord of the Rings.” Severus smiled at that.

“You alright?” James asked, squinting hard in an effort to observe Severus’ face without his glasses.

“Yeah, yeah I’m good,” he replied honestly.

“DADDY!” yelled Grace.

“Coming princess,” James said, running a tired hand through his hair and conjuring a glass. “‘Night Sev.” He walked past Severus and went to open Grace’s door. Suddenly, Severus had a stupidly strong desire to set the record straight.

“Hey Jamie,” Severus said. James whipped around, surprised at the use of the nickname which was typically only brought out in times of great distress.

“How you feel about me, how much you care, you know I feel the same, right?” he asked.

“Merlin, Sev, of course I do,” James said, stepping forward. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

Severus just smiled and nodded, surprisingly, he was. He had a life he was happy with, people who he loved and who loved him, and aside from feeling the tiniest bit shocked with the realization that he had ended up content, everything was good. He had somehow healed.

“Daddddy, I can hear you,” whined Grace, Severus and James smirked at the girl’s precociousness.

“I’m great. Go give Gracie her water before she files a human rights complaint,” Severus said, nodding towards the child’s door with a smile.

“Alright, see you tomorrow, Sev. Sleep well,” James said with a smile before walking into Grace’s room.

Jason ended up spending the rest of Christmas break with Severus. There were no other Slytherins staying for Christmas, and Severus didn’t want to send the boy back to the dorms alone so Severus had let him stay in his house.

He played with Michael, and immediately got on with Pauline who was showing him how to cook. In a surprisingly fast amount of time it felt like routine. When he brought Jason to the Potters’ for Christmas and the boy smiled at him over top of James’ large, stuffed turkey, Severus realized that he didn’t want this routine to end with Christmas break.

“I could take him,” Severus said softly to Dumbledore over a glass of firewhiskey. Dumbledore raised a silver eyebrow at him.

“He is my ward for eight months out of the year as is,” Severus continued.

“This would not just be extending your wardship duties for a few months, Severus,” Dumbledore said seriously. “A child needs love, family, commitment -”

“I know,” Severus said intently. “I can provide that.”

Dumbledore looked at him for a moment longer.

“I want to provide that,” Severus continued softly. “Polly too, we’ve spoken about it.” Dumbledore nodded, a smile coming to his face.

“We’ll see what we can do then,” he said.

It turned out that Dumbledore couldn’t do much. Severus was about to approach Jason about the idea when Dumbledore came to their door with a serious expression to tell them that Jason’s mother had left her brute of a husband and wanted Jason back.

“Alright, you call us if you need anything, alright,” Pauline said maternally, shoving a box of cupcakes in his directions. “Those are for you and your Mom.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Professor,” he said with a smile hugging her quickly. Mrs. Professor has started out as a joke but the nickname had quickly stuck, much to Pauline’s chagrin. She smiled at the name, a little misty-eyed now.

“Bye Mikey! We’ll play some more when I”m back at school, ok?” Jason said bending down in front of the toddler. With a very serious expression, Michael handed him the blue car they had been playing with.

“Is this for me?” Jason asked.

“I have lots. I don’t know if you have one in your place,” whispered Michael shyly.

“Thanks, buddy,” Jason said hugging the little boy.

“Thank you, Professor, for letting me stay,” Jason whispered as he picked up his bags. There was a moroseness in his face that Severus felt deep in his heart.

“Anytime, Jason,” Severus said. Jason nodded tightly, then stepped forward and hugged him. Snape hugged him back and was surprised to find tears in the boys eyes when he pulled away.

“You know we’re always here, if you need us,” Severus said seriously. The boy gave a watery smile and nodded.

“Alright then,” Severus said. He apparated the boy to his mother's new home, making sure he was settled in before heading to the Potters. Lily and Pauline were going out, and her Aunt and Uncle had Michael. It wasn’t quite the fantastic night of no responsibilities that he and James had planned, but at least there were only four kids to deal with.

Severus could smell the tell-tale spicy smell of chilli the moment he stepped out of the fireplace and sat down at the table with a smirk.

“You made chilli?” asked Severus.

“You like chilli,” James said, sending a loaf of bread into the oven.

“You only make chilli when you think I’m upset,” said Severus. James handed him a bowl with a smile.

“That’s not true, I also make it when you’re sick,” James said, sitting on the chair across from him. “Oh and when Moony makes me watch American Football.” James looked at Severus seriously from the other end of the table.

“I’m fine, Potter, really,” Severus said. “It all works out for the best this way. Jason gets to stay with his family, and taking on an abused teenager would have been a huge responsibility, anyways.”

James nodded thoughtfully and ran a hand through his dark hair before summoning a large plate of garlic bread from the oven.

“Yeah, except as much as we gripe about that responsibility, there’s nothing better. You would have been great with him,” said James, cutting the bread into neat slices with a wave of his wand.

“If this is you trying to cheer me up, you’re failing miserably,” Severus said taking a bite of his chilli.

“He’ll still need you, even if it’s not the same,” James said. “And unfortunately there are a lot of kids out there like him who need a home. If that’s -”

“Uncle Sev!” said Sirius happily, climbing onto Severus’ lap like it was a jungle-gym. Severus sat back in his chair to make way for the bony little boy to squeeze himself between Severus’ lap and the table.

“I didn’t know you were coming for dinner,” Harry said. He ran over an hugged Severus around the neck, which was unusual for the 8 year old who had now decided he was mostly too old for casual hugs and cuddles.

“Well, your Dad made chilli. Resistance is futile,” Severus said.

“Well since you’re here, can you help me with my Math homework?” Harry said with an almost pleading grin on his face. The hug suddenly made a lot more sense.

“I could look over your homework!” James said indignantly

“You don’t understand it either,” Harry said, getting a playful cuff on the head from James.

“I understand some of it,” James muttered when Severus raised his eyebrows at him.

“Of course monkey, what don’t you understand?” Severus asked, serving some of the chilli up on to a plate for Sirius.

“All of it,” Harry said with a bright smile. Severus snorted.

“Alright, we’ll work it out together. Go get Millie and Grace for dinner,” Severus said, tucking a napkin into the front of Sirius’ shirt.

“MILLIE! GRACE!” yelled Harry.

“Uncle Sev could have done that himself,” James said. “Get them nicely.”  Harry rolled his eyes, but jumped out of his chair obediently and ran up the stairs calling for his siblings.

“Uncle Sev it’s hot!” said Sirius, who had taken a bite of the chilli while Severus wasn’t paying attention.

“I’m sorry, love, here,” said Severus, blowing on another spoonful and blowing on it before he brought to the boy’s mouth.

“I mean really, Sev, you have a bunch of people here who are in desperate need of you. Look at us, we can’t even get through a meal without your supervision,” James said with a smile, summoning two bottles of Butterbeer and handing one out to Severus.

Severus smirked at that, and moments later Harry came back in the room, holding Grace’s hand with Amelia trailing them.

“Alright, quasi-family dinner. Let’s eat,” James said, passing around the plates.