Winter had always been Severus' favourite season. The cold weather always provided a reasonable excuse for solitude and reading books by the fire. One could almost disappear for three months without anyone thinking anything of it. Of course, that all changed from the first Christmas he spent with the Potters.

Now Christmas meant presents, huge parties, and James dressing up as Santa, all of which required much more socializing, dressing up and planning. The big Christmas party was two nights away, which meant James had dragged Severus to Diagon Alley to get decorations and party clothes for Amelia and Harry.

"Daddy, I want a hot chocolate," said Harry, lumbering along in his big snowsuit and boots. James picked him up and put him on his shoulders.

"Ok, love," James said. "Can you say, please, please?"

"Please, please!" chorused Harry, the common response to a request for manners. Severus smiled at him before noticing where they were going to get hot chocolate.

Severus suddenly halted at the entrance to the bakery. James, Harry and Amelia all blinked at him, incredulously.

"What's the matter?" James asked. As much as Severus did not want to have to go through the awkwardness of seeing Pauline, he really did not want to go to through the awkwardness of having to explain that to James.

"Nothing," he muttered. James raised his eyebrows, but walked into the bakery without further comment.

The bakery was filled with people taking an afternoon break and little houseelves, all dressed up like Santa's elves, ran from table to table with cake and hot drinks. Thankfully, Pauline didn't seem to be anywhere in sight.

"Uncle Sev, do you think the pretty lady will be here today?" asked Harry as he clamoured onto the seat beside Severus.

"The pretty lady?" James asked, smirking at Severus. A faint blush started to creep up Severus' cheeks as Harry enthusiastically recounted the story to James who kept peering over at Severus with a look that was far too pleased for Severus' liking.

"This is an intriguing development," James said. "After all my efforts, it is going to be my three year old son that is your wingman."

"Don't be ridiculous, Potter," grumbled Severus.

"There she is!" Harry said, so loudly that Pauline, who just came out of the kitchen with plates of cake, started and looked at the table. "Hi!" Harry said waving brightly at her.

Severus willed the veins and capillaries in his face to close so he wouldn't blush a deep red, but he could feel the heat crawl up his neck. James was hiding behind his hand, laughing. Pauline smiled at Harry and walked over. When James didn't stop laughing like a schoolgirl, Severus kicked the man sharply in the shins.

"Hello Harry," Pauline said.

Pauline turned her glowing, perfect smile to the little boy, and crouched down to his eye level, making her shiny dark ponytail slide over her shoulder in a very appealing way.

"How's your nose?" she asked.

"S'ok," Harry said, with a shrug. "This is my Daddy." Harry indicated James with a jerk of his thumb.

"Otherwise known as James," said James with a smile, reaching a hand out to shake Pauline's over Harry's head.

"I'm Polly. Nice to meet you," she said. As soon as she shook James' hand, she turned her smile onto Severus. He wasn't prepared for that to happen so quickly and felt rather like a deer in the headlights.

"Hi," she said with an expectant bubbliness that he completely did not know how to respond to.

"Hey," he replied awkwardly, scrambling madly to get his thoughts under control. There was the briefest moment of awkwardness where Pauline continued to smile at him, and James blinked at him as well.

"I've heard great things about your cake," mentioned James, just as Polly looked like she as going to turn away.

"There not really mine, to be fair," Pauline said even as a proud blush came over her face. "They're Ed's, he's the owner. I just make them."

"That seems like the important part," James mentioned.

"Well, then I'll bring you a piece of strawberry cheesecake," Polly said with a wide-smile. James blinked at her in surprise, then laughed.

"How did you know I like strawberry cheesecake? I could hate all berries," James said in protest.

"You love berries," Harry said. "Berries are you favourite." Pauline ruffled Harry's mop of hair, with a smile and turned to head back to the kitchen. James gave Severus an urgent sort of look that Severus didn't understand. With a growl of frustration, James turned back to Pauline.

"Will you join us?" James asked, suddenly. Pauline considered them for a moment, then nodded, walking back into the kitchen.

The moment she was gone, James whipped around to Severus.

"Dude," he said in a disappointed tone. "You suck."

"Shut up, Potter," Severus grumbled. Harry gasped and gave Severus a look of deep horror.

"That's mean," admonished Harry. James nodded sagely, smirking at Severus the moment the little boy turned away.

"Let's just go," grumbled Severus, he was no mood to be made fun of.

"I want cake," protested Harry, looking precariously close to crying.

"We're getting cake, honey," James said, sensing the situation was about to devolve. "Sev, I'm sorry. Please, sit down." With a little grunt, Severus acquiesced, he was too nervous to pay James that much mind anyways. James checked over his shoulder and leaned little closer, covering Harry's ears.

"Talk to her," James said, his voice a little lower. At that moment, Polly came out of the back, balancing the plates of cake precariously on a serving dish. Instinctively, Severus jumped to his feet and stumbled the two steps to help her.

It didn't go as well as he planned. He took two steps then tripped and crashed directly into Pauline. There was an explosion of cake and limbs and screams, and he was on top of Pauline on the floor.

"Are you ok?" he whispered the moment he came to his senses. He scrambled off of her. She opened her mouth to respond, but before she could, a large aproned man with a grubby, little beard stumbled out of the kitchen

"What the hell?" he bellowed. Polly swore under her breath and scrambled to her feet. Severus' eyes briefly met Pauline's, and she looked away, embarrassed.

"Ed, I'm sorry, it was an accident," she said quickly, reaching down and picking up some of the broken plates. Severus followed, and James too stood up and moved to help.

"Maybe you should be less clumsy," the man said again. Severus scowled up at this unknown man, and straightened up to his full height.

"It was my fault," Severus said. Behind him, James swirled his wand and the plates all jumped back together. The man just sneered slightly, and looked back down to Pauline.

"Get in the kitchen," he said harshly.

"Hey, don't talk to her like that," said Severus, stiffening. Some of the other patrons were starting to look over.

"It's ok," Pauline said softly to Severus, taking the newly formed plates and standing up.

"Damn right, it's ok. This bitch breaks a damn plate every day," he said gruffly. James stood up now as well and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Severus took his wand out of his sleeve and took a menacing step towards the man.

"What did you just say?" he asked, in a dark, low voice.

"Buddy, you don't scare me. This is my damn restaurant. Get the fuck out," said Ed. Before he could move to curse the man, James stepped in between them.

"Hey!" snapped James he gave Ed one hard push, then turned back to Severus. "Calm down." Severus opened his mouth, but James flickered his eyes towards Harry who was watching the interaction from between the slats of the chair with wide-green eyes. Severus nodded, and they quickly exited the store.

"Well, I admit, that could have gone better," James said as they exited the store.

"What's a bitch?" asked Harry. James sighed and looked up to the sky.

"A bad word," James said.

"I'm going to wait and apologize," Severus said. James looked at him for a moment, as though he was going to say it was a bad idea, but he thought better of it then nodded.

They left the bakery, but Severus went to stand at the back door. Hours later, Severus was cold and beginning to deeply regret his stake-out when Pauline opened the back door and came out in a large pink coat, holding a cupcake. When she saw him, she smiled, which he took as a good sign.

"I am so sorry," said Severus, stepping forward from the tree had been leaning against for hours.

"Ed is a jerk," she said with smile. "But he gives me a lot of hours. I'm saving for my own bakery." Severus nodded and stuffed his hand in his pockets, feeling again at a loss again.

"Well good -" There was a moment of awkward silence, and he ground his teeth together before turning to walk away.

"Would you like to go out some time?" she asked, cutting him off. He blinked at her a couple times, and a slow smile spread across her face.

"With you?" he sputtered stupidly. She was all bubbly, well-adjusted, and happy. He was a four at best, she she was at least an eight. He didn't understand she was talking to him, let alone wanting him to take her out on a date.

"Yes, with me," she said cocking her head a little to the side.

"Sure - I mean yes that would be -" he trailed off his rambling a little helplessly, and she smiled.

"Great!" she said brightly, without the slightest indication of being nervous or otherwise flustered.

The date cascaded into another, and another and soon he and Pauline were kissing and laughing, and he was deeply, deeply falling for her, and soon he was doing things like eating dinner in a corner booth at a fancy restaurant.

"What are you thinking about?" Pauline whispered into his ear. She was wearing a short, delicate white dress that perfectly showed off her slim shoulders.

"Nothing," he said, kissing her on the forehead. The waiter walked by and glanced at them. He could see the spark of disbelief on his features as he walked by. Severus pulled away. He was just to go back to his dessert when Pauline swiped the last piece of cake out from under him and ate it.

Severus looked up incredulously at her and she giggled. Her eyes shone brightly and she hid her smile behind her hand. When he looked at her, his heart tightened. She was all sweetness and light, and he absolutely wasn't.

"Why are you with me?" Severus asked. Pauline stopped laughing and put her fork down, but the light and smile remained.

'Cause…I like you," she said with a laugh, going to kiss him again. He pulled away before she could.

"I'm serious -" snapped Severus, the insecurity that had wrecked him for weeks came bubbling to the surface. The smile fell off of her face at the change in tone.

"I - I don't know," she said. "Because I want to be?" She reached over and put her hand over his, looking concerned now. "Sev?"

"You're funny, attractive, smart. You're sweet," said Severus. "I've seen two different men look you over since we sat down." Pauline blushed and looked down at her plate.

"The only thing that makes sense, is that you're not with me because of who I am, but because of you are. You're a good person, and I'm your charity case, your way to feel better about yourself," Severus said, pulling his hand out from underneath him. For a moment, Pauline looked at him in stunned anger, then her features softened.

"You really think that little of yourself?" she whispered. He had been expecting anger, not pity which suddenly made him feel even more filled with self-loathing.

"You think that I'm so much better than you, that only reason I want to be with you is to have a charity case?" she said, sitting back in her chair.

"I want you to listen to me very carefully," said Pauline softy. "I like you because you are funny, attractive, smart, and I think you are very, very sweet." She leaned forward and touched his face, rubbing her thumb a long his cheekbone.

He stared back at her. There was no room for doubt. She wasn't lying, but still he couldn't believe she actually thought those things.

"I love you," she said leaning across the table to kiss him lightly on the lips. She wasn't even mad at him for exploding at her. He kissed her back as hard as he could over the table. He was at a romantic restaurant, with a beautiful woman who just said that he loved him. For some reason he started to laugh against her lips.

"What?" she said warily.

"Nothing, nothing." he said. "I'm just…I'm very happy."

"And that's funny?" she said, tucking a stand of hair behind his ear.

"A little," he whispered, kissing her again.

XXXXXXXxxxxXXXXXX

"Well, well, well, someone has some explaining to do." Severus froze at the sound of Lily's voice. It was 5 AM, she was supposed to be in bed asleep for at least another hour. He winced and turned to around to face her. She was smiling at him, already dressed for work at the kitchen table.

"I have no idea what you mean," he said walking over to the table and picking up a piece of toast.

"I mean, I know a walk of shame when I see one," Lily replied, pouring him coffee.

"How? You married the first guy you ever slept with," Severus said, earning himself a hearty smack across the arm. With a contented sigh, he leaned back in his chair and summoned a teacup with a lazy swish of his wand. He hummed a little tune he had heard on Pauline's radio last night as he fixed his tea, stopping short when he caught Lily watching him.

"What?" he asked, feeling suddenly defensive.

"Nothing, it's just that you really like this girl, don't you?" Lily said. A flush of embarrassment flooded Severus' cheeks, and he looked down at the table before he grinned like an idiot.

"I'm glad you're so happy," Lily said with genuine feeling, giving his hand a small squeeze. He was about to reply when a pure black, imperious looking owl flew the window and landed by Lily's toast. After she untied the message and read it, her face paled to a chalk white, and she stared at the paper for way longer than necessary

"Lily?" Severus asked in concern. She blinked away from the paper and turned a bright smile to Severus.

"Is everything alright?" he asked, nodding at the letter.

"Oh yeah, just boring law stuff," she said, stuffing the parchment into her briefcase hurriedly. Severus frowned, but quickly forgot all about the letter as Lily launched back into teasing him about Pauline.

The next few weeks, Severus was so busy preparing for the launch of his book that he barely noticed Lily's increase in mail or the headlines in the paper.

"International Wizarding Federation should stay out of Muggle relations or die?" James read over her shoulder one morning. Lily blanched and crumbled up the paper. The International Wizarding Federation was the wizard's equivalent of the United Nations, and clearly, the strong Muggle protection stance Lily and Arthur were taking within the organization was upsetting some wizards.

"Don't worry about it, honey. I get letters like that all the time," Lily said quickly, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

"You do?" James asked, looking back down at the letter. "Somehow, that doesn't really reassure me." He looked at Severus for support who was also frowning.

"Lily…" started Severus in protest, but she cut him off.

"I'm fine. This is an important initiative, and you two need to leave it alone," she snapped, grabbing her briefcase and heading to the floo. The more negative press the Muggle protection laws got, the more James worried. He never said anything, but Severus could tell in the way his jaw-set every time he kissed Lily goodbye.

But Muggle protection was only vaguely on Severus' mind. People kept pre-ordering his book, which meant his book launch party was turning bigger and more extravagant. By the time it arrived, Flourish and Blotts was too small to host it so the entire thing had been moved to the Leaky Cauldron.

"This is so exciting!" Pauline said as they walked into the bookstore. His face stared imposingly back from a large poster, and it was awkward to look at. Everyone he walked by wanted to stop and talk him and Alan, his thin bald agent came who wore robes that were too big for him came running up.

"100,000 galleons my friend, and this is just the beginning!" he squeeked, so excited Severus was worried he'd fall over. 100,000 was more money then Severus had ever had in his entire life and he blinked a little incredulously at the man.

More people took pictures, he signed book after book, and the people he wanted to spend the day with the most, James, Lily, Remus, Dumbledore and Polly kept getting swallowed by the crowd. It wasn't until the publisher made a speech that he finally had a moment to sneak away. He found James predictably stuffing his face with appetizers.

"If you keep going at this rate, I'm going to need to publish another book just to pay for your food bill," muttered Severus as he approached. James stuffed a shrimp in his mouth and smiled.

"That's not what I hear, mate," James said. "It looks like it's a hit." Severus tilted his head in acknowledgement. He hadn't had enough success or privilege in life to know how to go about being humble. Compliments still felt odd to him.

"About that," Severus said "I wanted to give you this. Well not give you so much as repay you." He handed a pouch of galleons out to James who regarded it with disdain.

"That better be candy, Sev," James said wiping his hand on a napkin.

"No, it's gold."

"We've discussed this. I have no interest in your money," James said irritably.

"I appreciate that Potter, but I have no interest in sponging off of you. I live in your house the least I can do is give you some gold," Severus said. At least this way he'd feel like less of a burden. James seemed to pick up on what Severus was thinking because his features softened a little.

"It is your house too, Sev. You'll never have to leave it." James looked over his shoulder to make sure no one else could hear, then continued softly. "And you know money is not a problem. You don't need much, you're kind of like a pet gerbil."

"Well money isn't a problem for me either, so let me contribute," replied Severus. "Of course, I could just bypass you and put this straight into Millie and Harry's Hogwarts fund." James snorted at that and shook his head.

"Remus just pulled the same stunt," James said. "I got a letter from Gringotts telling me 50,000 galleons had been added to my account and would I like to invest them. It took three hours of my life to figure out it was Remus, because the git never bothered to tell me. He didn't think they'd write me a letter and that I'd just not notice the extra money."

"You are terrible with your money," Severus noted, "You'd give it away to anyone who asked."

"Why not, I have enough," James said with a laugh before turning a tinge more serious. "Is it important to you, to do this?" Severus's father never had any money, barely supported himself let alone his family, and Severus always vowed he'd be different. He did not need much, but what he needed he'd provide for himself.

"Yes. It is," he said simply. James sighed and held his hand out. With a smirk, Severus dropped the bag of galleons into the man's hand. It landed with a satisfying plop. James looked at it for a moment then shoved it in his pocket, hurriedly.

"Merlin Sev, how much did you put in there?" James hissed. Severus shrugged.

"30,000, about," Severus whispered back. James blanched a little.

"That's way too much., and I can't walk around with this much money. The Goblins are going to think I'm some sort of ganglord. I'm going to get robbed."

"You weren't expecting the money anyways, Potter. It hardly matters if you get robbed," Severus said blandly. James still had a look of distaste on his face. Severus sighed, rich people were so weird about money.

"If it makes you feel any better. You can think of it as a return on your investment in my book," Severus said. James smiled at that.

"It's a pretty great book," James said. Still adverse to compliments, Severus blushed and nodded awkwardly. He hadn't even known the man had read it. Lily spotted them and walked over with her hand raised. She was just about to say something, when there was a loud bang and she gave a funny jerk. Before Severus could process what was happening, she fell to her knees.

James was already yelling for her and running to her side.

"LIVE LIKE A MUGGLE, DIE LIKE A MUGGLE!" yelled a masked man from the crowd, but Severus barely heard him. He jumped over the table, arriving at Lily's side the moment James did. The crowd screamed and panicked.

"Lil? Lily?" James asked his voice was high and petrified, something Severus had never heard before. She blinked in shock, and her eyes connected with James. Severus quickly tore open front of her robes to find a bloody bullet hole in her chest. Cold fear went through him.

"What spell is that?" asked James, bordering on distraught. Without responding, Severus conjured a large roll of bandages and pressed them to the wound.

"Apparate her to St. Mungo's, now," Severus said tersely. "It's a gunshot." James' eyes widened a bit, and Severus wondered if the man had every heard of a gun shot before. Regardless, James obeyed without a further word.

Blankly, Severus stared at the bloody floor for a moment before realizing the maniac who did this was still out there. He growled in rage and raced through the screaming crowd toward the door. If Lily died, he would not be held responsible for his actions.

"Severus, stop," Dumbledore said, the only voice that could make him do so. Like a well-trained dog, Severus halted and whipped around. Dumbledore was looking at him in concern.

"The Aurors are already on their way, and Remus is out there," said Dumbledore firmly, before Severus could object. "There are children, I believe, who need you right now." Another swoop of horror filled Severus' stomach, he had been so concerned for Lily, he hadn't even thought of Harry or Amelia. He raced through the increasingly hysterical crowd calling for them.

"Sev!" Pauline called from across the room. She was standing by Amelia's stroller and holding Harry on her hip. Severus let out a sigh of relief.

"Are you ok?" he almost yelled as he approached them, peeking in the stroller where Amelia was fussing, but unhurt.

"Just a little shook up," Pauline said, looking at Harry who was still sobbing into her shoulder. The boy reached out for Severus the moment he approached, and Severus hurriedly took him from Pauline. Harry wrapped his arms around Severus' neck with such fervour it almost choked him, and he was shaking like a leaf.

"It's ok, love, shhh," whispered Severus, stroking the baby's messy hair. "You're safe, shhh." After a few moments, he calmed down to simple whimpers. As his concern with calming the child dissipated, his concerns about Lily and James returned.

"I'll stay with the kids," said Pauline, reading his mind. "Go." Severus nodded.

"Polly's going to stay with you ok?" Severus said to Harry. The boy whimpered a little then mashed his face into Severus' neck.

"Where'd Momma go?" whispered Harry. "She laid down and there was a bang." Severus' felt another moment of tension in his gut, and he lowered the baby to the floor.

"Don't worry. Everything's going to be ok," Severus said, squeezing his shoulder. He didn't quite know how to explain the attack to the child. He looked up to Pauline and she crouched down beside Harry as well.

"If you want cutie-pie, I can show you how to make a chocolate cake," offered Pauline. Harry nodded after a moment, then accepted the hand she was holding out to him.

"Ok. Monkey, I'm going to be back soon, alright?" said Severus, kissing the toddler on the cheek. Harry nodded bravely, before he could change his mind and throw a tantrum, Severus turned around and disaparated to St. Mungo's.

"Lily Potter!" Severus said running to the front desk. A harried nurse looked down at the list of patients.

"She's in surgery." he said Severus.

"How is she?" asked Severus.

"I don't know, sir," continued the nurse, flipping though more documents. "A Healer should be with you shortly." Severus huffed in annoyance and looked around the waiting room for James. There was an old witch rubbing her knee, and a tall boy in Quidditch clothes holding a broomstick and a black eye. No James. With even more anxiety now, Severus starting to madly roam the floors of St. Mungos.

He found James standing in an empty hallway, leaning against the wall as though it was the only thing holding him. Blood still covered his clothes There was such a naked look of despair on his face, that Severus almost retreated back to the waiting room, but some internal force propelled him forward.

"Potter?" he whispered softly. James looked up at him briefly, then stared back down at the floor again, looking absolutely decimated.

"Polly is with the children," Severus said softly. "Remus is on his way." James just nodded at the ground. Severus felt horribly inadequate as he stood silently beside the man unable to think of the words.

"She's going to be ok," continued Severus. James sucked in a harsh breath, and dropped his chin to his chest, giving another unconvincing little nod.

A noise, like a little sniffle, from the man cracked Severus' heart. Hesitantly, Severus reached up and squeezed James' shoulder, desperate to do something. Without further reticence, James pitched forward and let out a few broken sobs on Severus' shoulder.

"It's going to be ok," Severus muttered, because he couldn't think of anything else to say. Thinking about Lily made Severus want to burst into tears himself, and she wasn't his wife or the mother of his children. Still, he loved her enough he could empathize with the depths of James' despair. For a moment, he tried to imagine what life would be like with out Lily. Him, James and the kids, it seemed like a bad sitcom. He tightened his grip so that he was holding James properly, the man accepted it for a moment, then pulled away.

"Thank you for coming," muttered James as he looked down.

"Of course," Severus said, as they slowly started to walk back down the hall towards the waiting room. "Family, right?" James smiled a little, and Severus realized that it was the probably the first time he had called them that.

There was more tense silence as they waited. Finally, as Healer came through with an almost bored look on his face.

"Potter, Lily." Both James and Severus jumped to their feet, James' face the colour of cottage cheese.

"Is she ok?" he asked. before the doctor could get a word out.

"She's fine. We were able to shrink and remove the bullet and luckily it missed all major organs. I'd like to keep her overnight for observation and to manage any pain, but we should be able to let her go tomorrow," the Healer with a smile. James keeled over in relief and laughed a little hysterically. Severus gently laid a hand on his back.

"Can we see her?" asked Severus. They were led to a semi-private room. The other occupant, an Indian woman with horns coming out of her skull, was sleeping peacefully in the other bed, but Lily was awake, half-way sitting up on the pillows. She gave them a wide, beaming smile and the remaining anxiety Severus had was replaced with relief so desperate, he felt a little faint.

James had already run to her side to hold her and was whispering something in her ear that made her nod and tear-up as she clutched him back. It was such an intimate moment, Severus almost felt guilty for intruding on it, but Lily turned smiled at him and opened her arms.

"How are you doing?" he asked, stepping forward to hug her tightly.

"I'm fine," she whispered, sounding genuine. Finally, there was a lull in the conversation, and James leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead.

"I'm going to find whoever did this, and I'm going to kill them," James said with such force, Severus almost believed it.

"Honey," Lily said squeezing his hand lightly. "It's alright, everything's fine. Just let the Aurors do their job."

"I'm going to let the children, Polly and Remus know that you're okay," he whispered moving her hair behind her ear. "They're all worried about you. Sev, you don't mind staying?" Severus shook his head.

"I'm sorry I stole your thunder," Lily said, as soon as James left. "It was such a big day for you."

"I can't think of anything I care less about," Severus said, sitting on the edge of her hospital bed. She smiled and rested her hand on his.

"Thank you for taking care of James and the kids," she said, her eyes shining with tears. "I don't know what I'd do without you." Severus recalled with horrible clarity, the previous hour when he didn't know what was going to happen or how injured she was.

"Me neither," admitted Severus, squeezing her hand back. She smiled at him then motioned for her purse that was sitting on the chair.

"Anyways, on to more important things. People get shot everyday" she said riffling through her bag with a slightly pained expression. "But best-sellers are rare, so I was hoping you maybe put a good word in with the author. See if he'll sign this for me?"

She handed him her book with a smile, and he signed it with a smirk.

"Severus Snape," she said looking at it with faint disapproval. "That is what I get 'Severus Snape'? No note? I just got shot for Merlin's sake."

Severus rolled his eyes, took back the book and hastily scrolled "Love" on top of his name and handed it back.

"Much better," she said with a smile.

XXxxxxXXX

Pauline was warm and wet under the beads of water from the shower. Severus kissed her insistently, and her arms wound tightly around his neck, playing with his hair. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her naked body close to his. He kissed the side of her thin neck, and she gasped a little in his ear. He was going to keep kissing downward when the bathroom door burst open with a loud crash.

"Uncle Sev!" yelped Harry, hysterically. Severus immediately pulled away from the Pauline and gave her a panicked look. She clapped her hands over her mouth and giggled.

"Uh - uhm - what's wrong, monkey?" Severus asked hurriedly, summoning a towel and wrapping around his waist. He cast an apologetic look to Pauline and pulled back curtain just enough so he could step out of the bathtub. Harry was standing there tearfully with a piece of lego sticking out of nose. Severus tried not to laugh.

"Where's your Mommy?" Severus asked as he picked the boy up and sat him on the bathroom counter.

"Putting Millie to bed," Harry said softly. "I was just playing."

"It's ok," said Severus reassuringly. He pointed his wand at the boys face and shrunk the piece of lego so that it fell out of his nose. As soon as it fell out, he cast a cleaning charm on it, resized it and handed it back to the toddler.

"Legos aren't for your nose," he said sternly. Harry nodded gravely, but stopped when a chuckle came from the shower.

"Who's in there?" he asked curiously.

"No one's in there," said Severus hurriedly, lifting the boy off of the counter and sending him out the door. "Go play." Harry looked a little put out at being shuttled out of the room, but did what he was told.

As soon as the boy was far enough away, Severus pulled back the curtain. Pauline still had her hands over her mouth and she burst out laughing now that Harry was gone.

"I can't believe you laughed," Severus said, stepping back into the shower.

"Legos aren't for your nose!" she said, mimicking his stern voice and face. "You're no fun."

"That's not true. I've been told I can be a lot of fun," Severus whispered. Pauline pulled his towel off and kissed his ear lightly.

"Is that so?" He turned the water on, and was about to kiss her when the door burst open again.

"Have any toilet paper in here?" James asked, his mouth full of toothpaste. This time Pauline screamed and Severus jumped as well.

"Does anyone knock in this bloody house?" yelled Severus. poking his head out of the shower curtain to glare murderously at James, who looked ridiculous holding the toilet paper in one hand and his toothpaste in the other with an expression of complete shock.

"So sorry. Hi Polly!" he said backing out of the room. As he was about to leave he gave Severus a large thumbs up and mouthed 'nice'. Severus rolled his eyes and put his head back in the curtain.

The water was still running, but one look at Pauline's face told him the mood had totally died. Still she threw him such an adorably, embarrassed grin, he found he didn't mind.

"I'm starting to prune," she said with a laugh. Severus summoned a towel and wrapped it around her shoulders, kissing her lightly on the nose. She looked up to him, blushed then stepped out of the tub, and he could feel his heart hammer in his head chest insistently.

"I am so sorry," James said when Pauline and Severus came down for breakfast the next morning. Lily waggled her eyebrows, which got her a slap on the shoulder from Pauline. Severus just glared and accepted the pancakes James passed sheepishly to him.

Severus sat down on the nearest chair and jumped up when he landed on a set of lego. His hatred for this stupid Muggle toy was at an all-time high. Harry giggled at him deviously. Lily was trying to feed Amelia pancakes, but the baby was in the middle of the terrible twos and putting up an enormous fight involving a lot of screaming. Neither James not Pauline minded, both of them were having a loud conversation over it. Everything was so damn loud, that he almost missed the voice coming from the fireplace.

"Professor Dumbledore, sorry sir," Severus said getting to his feet when he finally saw the man's face in the fireplace. Dumbledore smiled graciously.

"Never mind my dear boy, a loud kitchen is a happy one," he said. All of the adults in the room regarded the fireplace with worried eyes. Unannounced visits from Dumbledore typically did not bode well.

"Is everything alright, sir? Would you like to come through?" James asked solicitously. "We have pancakes."

"Everything's fine James, and as partial as I am to your pancakes, I was simply hoping to borrow Severus for a moment," replied Dumbledore, smiling at Severus. Momentarily taken aback, Severus blinked in surprise but nodded.

"Wonderful, I'll see you momentarily," said Dumbledore cheerfully. With that, Dumbledore vanished from the fireplace.

Severus arrived moments later in Dumbledore's lush office. He hadn't been in it since he was a boy, and he blinked at all the curious portraits ands shiny silver instruments in curiosity before he realized Dumbledore was staring at him with a smile.

"It's rather overwhelming isn't it?" said Dumbledore with a smile, please sit down. Surprisingly, Dumbledore took the second visitors chair instead of sitting behind his desk.

"I was hoping to ask you a favour," Dumbledore said, there was a twinkle in his eye that worried Severus, but he nodded.

"Horace Slughorn is retiring at the end of this year, and I was hoping that you would consent to the post of Head of Slytherin House and come teach at Hogwarts," said Dumbledore with a bright smile. Completely taken aback Severus simply gaped for a few moments.

"Sir, I - I have not practiced Potions in years, and I certainly do not believe I'd be capable of adequately monitoring a hundred students," said Severus when his mind finally started to work again.

"Ah yes, I am well aware that you have not practiced Potions in years, that's why I would be offering you the post of Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor," Dumbledore said. "Professor Eagleton who currently teaches it is more than capable of teaching Potions, and has expressed his preference for doing so to me."

"I don't know that I'd be a good teacher, sir," continued Severus, his mind reeling.

"Severus, your Defence Guide has become a best seller. You wrote with knowledge and clarity. I believe you'd be a fine instructor," Dumbledore said with such confidence that Severus almost believed it.

"Would I live at Hogwarts?" Severus asked after a moment of consideration. There was a look in Dumbledore's eye that was all too knowing, and he gave Severus an understanding nod.

"Heads of House are required to live on campus so their wards may find them in times of need," Dumbledore said. Severus nodded vaguely.

His soul up until the night Voldemort almost attacked the Potter's had been a broken, fragile thing. When Lily and James took him into their house, it was like they had put that fractured soul in a firm, protective cast. They treated it with concern and care, and slowly it had begun to knit back together. Still, he was far from believing that he was ready to pull of the cast and walk alone.

"Think about it," Dumbledore said. "Take the week."

It was all he could think about, and both James and Lily could tell something was up. They kept sharing concerned looks and asking probing questions. Now when he went to bed in his little second floor bedroom he felt so safe in, he felt childish, and although Pauline never said anything and got on famously with both Potters and the children, bringing her to the Potters' felt a little bit like sneaking his girlfriend into his parents house.

Still, this was his home. The first place he had ever been loved, accepted and part of a family. It was easy to maintain that feeling when Lily was in the kitchen every morning, and James was barging in asking for toilet paper, but he wasn't certain that feeling would stay once he left. He was not a particularly pleasant man to be around, without that obligation they might just forget about him, and that thought was almost too painful to bear. Hogwarts, Severus reflected as he watched Harry and Amelia run around the kitchen, was just a job. This was his family, and he wasn't going to leave them.

He was so wrapped up in his own thoughts, that he almost didn't notice James' and Lily's huge smiles as they sat down across from him.

"Sev," Lily said softy. He looked up at their beaming faces, and frowned in confusion. "I'm pregnant." Behind her, James did a victory dance and whooped. Rapturous joy was clear on both their faces. His own heart warmed and leapt.

"Congratulations!" he said standing up and hugging them both. He looked at Lily's tear-filled eyes and James' proud grin and with sudden clarity realized that he wanted his heart to fill and rip the way their's were right now.

"I'm moving out," he said. The smiles promptly fell of their faces and he regretted the blunt delivery. When he apologized for stealing Lily's thunder, explained about Hogwarts and the job and reassured them that it was not the baby, they still didn't look particularly happy.

"So it's not cause there is going to be another baby running around here?" asked James uncertainly. As though the baby could suddenly be removed from the picture if that was the complaint. They were now on their fourth cup of tea, and both of them still looked vaguely disapproving.

"No, Potter," Severus said for the third time. "It's just time. Certainly you didn't think I was going to live here forever?" James and Lily exchanged a look that Severus couldn't quite decipher.

"Well not forever," said James. "Just until, you know, you died." Severus gave him an exasperated look, but James thew his hands up.

"What? I like living with you. I thought you liked it here too!" James continued petulantly, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking very much like a sullen child.

"I do, Potter, really," said Severus. Both James and Lily were studying him carefully with almost identical looks of patient curiosity. "But I've got to make it on my own."

"Why?" said Potter. There was a touch of indignity in his voice. Lily gave him a quelling look. "No I'm serious. Why does anyone have to make it on their own? It seems to make a lot more sense to make it with your family."

"You really want to do this?" asked Lily gently, covering his hand with her warm one. In a real way, he didn't. He loved living in the Potter house more than he would ever care to admit to either of the Potters, and he was petrified to leave it.

"Yes," said Severus softly. "Positions at Hogwarts don't come around often, and I almost gave it up so I could stay here. Don't you see? I want to have a career, my own life, my own family even. If I stay here, I'll be so comfortable I'm afraid I'll never make that happen."

Lily squeezed his hand with a small, almost sad smile, and there was a slightly less defiant angriness to James' jaw.

"Alright then," Lily said. "We'll help move you out, anything you need." James grunted in agreement, which Severus could tell was the closest to whole-hearted support the man could get.

"Thank you," he said softly, knowing it was better to accept their help rather than upset them further.

Still, moving in to Hogwarts was supposed to be an easy process. Severus had never had owned more things then he needed, and he didn't need much. It would have taken only a few moments of taking boxes trough the fireplace, but James kept discovering things like kettles, towels and dish-soap that Severus didn't have because of his years with the Potters. That would have been fine if Lily hadn't then decided that the plain stone walls and Hogwarts-issued furnishings were 'depressing' and had to apparate all over London finding decorations.

By the end of it all, a process that was supposed to take a couple hours had taken the whole day and his formerly cold, drab apartment had a roaring fireplace, pictures and flowers on the mantle, a half-full bookshelf on one of the walls and thick, velvet curtains covering the floor-to-ceiling windows that took up a whole wall. The apartment was almost homey, and Amelia toddling around pulling things out of the drawers while James and Lily cooked made it even more so.

"Dinner's ready," Lily said, carrying over a large bowl of linguine and clam sauce. James followed, carrying Amelia, and Harry, who had been acting oddly silent, toddled behind. As Lily waved her wand at the pasta and made it obediently jump onto four separate plates, he felt a little morose. Most of his dinners would be eaten alone now, and they probably wouldn't involve clam sauce. Just then, a loud knock broke Severus would of his reverie. Sharing a look of confusion with James, Severus quickly hopped to his feet and strode purposefully strode over to the door and opened it.

Dumbledore, Minerva and Hagrid were standing at the door, smiling.

"Hello, Severus," said Dumbledore with a wide-smile.

"We wanted to give you a proper welcome to your new home. I didn't know you'd have company," Dumbledore said looking around at the Potters and the full dinner that was laid out on the table. "Please forgive the intrusion."

"Not at all, come in," said Severus. He recovered from his surprise with a blink and opened the door wider. Minerva gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and squeezed the top of his arm gently.

"I baked ya some rock-cakes, Professor," said Hagrid, handing over a small, dented tin.

"Just Severus, Hagrid. Thanks for these," Severus said, placing the rock cakes on the mantle. The last time Severus had eaten one of Hagrid's cakes, he had to have Lily repair his cracked tooth. It was not an experience he wished to repeat.

Soon, Dumbledore had multiplied the food and James had dug out some extra dishes and they were all squished around Severus' four person kitchen table. There was so many people in such a small place that he couldn't even consider that one day he may feel lonely.

"Come on, try one bite," Dumbledore said, attempting to tempt the youngest Potter into trying a clam. With a stubbornness only a toddler could manage she shook her small, dark pigtails from side-to-side and pushed away the spoon, spilling it everywhere.

"Alas, she is set in her ways," Dumbledore said with a laugh, cleaning the mess up with a swish of his wand.

"It took me awhile to like clams meself, something isn't right about slimy foods. This here is fantastic though," said Hagrid, as he look a large bite of the clam linguine. Lily smiled at him and put more food on his place.

"So Professor Snape, have you given any thought to how your going to run your house? You're about to have a hundred little Slytherins under your control," asked Minerva with a playful smile. From anyone else the question might have sounded accusatory, but from her it was an attempt to draw him under her wing.

"He's going to be so mean!" James said with a laugh. Severus snorted and rolled his eyes.

"I will not be mean," said Severus indignantly.

"I'm sure he'll be a very good teacher," said Dumbledore kindly. "The students will be lucky to have him." Hesitantly, Severus raised his eyes to meet Dumbledore's kind, twinkling ones. The older wizard would never know how much his support meant to Severus. Without it, he didn't think he'd ever be able to leave the Potters'. Suddenly, without warning, Harry jumped to his feet and bolted out of the kitchen to the bathroom. For a moment, the adults all exchanged bemused looks, but the boy's sullen moodiness started to suddenly make sense to Severus.

"Harry?" Lily said, standing to go after him.

"Was it something I said?" asked Dumbledore.

"I'll go," Severus said, waving Lily off. She sat down reluctantly and Severus walked over to the bathroom and knocked on the door.

"Harry?" asked Severus quietly.

"Go away!" yelled Harry, petulantly. Severus had known the boy ever since he could talk, had witnessed nearly every unsightly tantrum, and was barely fazed by the response. He opened the door to find the boy sitting on the side of the bathtub with his head in his hands. With a pang of sympathy, Severus strode across the room and knelt down in front the little boy. He could see thin lines of tears on the boy's flushed cheeks.

"What's wrong, Hare-bear?" asked Severus, putting a hand on Harry's knee. He just shrugged miserably in response.

"Why do you have to go?" whined Harry, rubbing at his eyes. With a sigh, Severus sat on the side of the bathtub and wrapped an arm around the little shoulders.

"Because I really would like to have this job," Severus said. Harry's lip trembled and more tears welled up in his eyes. "Oh now, come on. It's ok." Severus ran a hand up and down the boy's arm.

"But I don't want you to go."

"Alright, come here," Severus said, dragging Harry on to his lap. He was still young enough to melt against Severus' chest and cry earnestly into his shirt. Severus' large hand almost completely covered the boy's back, and when he pulled him close and kissed him on the head, it still felt like he was holding a baby.

"I don't want to leave you either," Severus said, stroking Harry's messy hair. "You can come visit me anytime you want, ok?" With a long sniff, Harry wiped his nose on his sleeve and stared up at Severus with big, watery eyes.

"Promise?" he whispered, wiping the last bit of moisture off of the pudgy cheeks. Severus nodded solemnly.

"I promise. Now, let's go out there and get some cake." Harry shook his head and wiped at his face.

"No. I'm blotchy," protested Harry. It was only the last few times Harry had cried that he had been embarrassed and concerned about being blotchy. He was growing up. Severus had been there for the majority of the baby's milestones, and it was oddly sad to think that he was going to start missing things.

He conjured a washcloth and turned on the tap to wet it.

"Let me see," whispered Severus. He pressed the wet cloth to the blotches on Harry's face. Tired from his outburst, Harry snuggled more completely into Severus' chest and started to suck his thumb. Soon the redness faded from the child's face and he smiled up at Severus.

"Now do you want cake?" asked Severus gently. Eagerly, Harry nodded and Severus picked him up, noticing again how much bigger the boy had gotten as he momentarily struggled to get to his feet.

"There they are!" Lily said, all the adults turned to look at Harry and Severus. The attention embarrassed Harry, who turned his head into Severus' neck to escape it.

"Hare-bear, do you want some cake?" asked James. The juicy slice of chocolate cake provided enough temptation for Harry to squirm down out of Severus' arms and ran to his father.

Soon the cake was done, Minerva, Hagrid and Dumbledore had gone to their own quarters, and both Harry and Amelia were fast asleep in Severus' guest bedroom. Severus had uncorked last bottle of elf-made wine and he and James were hovering somewhere between tipsy and drunk while Lily sipped tea and raised her eyebrows at their increasingly loud laughter.

"You guys are going to wake the children," she said with a chuckle, hitting James in the arm. "And it's late, we really should be getting back." James nodded and got to his feet with a groan.

"I'll get the kids," James said with a nod, disappearing into the guest bedroom. Lily looked at Severus, her eyes starting to swim alarmingly.

"Come on, don't cry," Severus said with a little groan.

"I'm pregnant, Sev. Everything makes me cry," she said stepping forward and hugged him.

"I'll still be around for babysitting, Sunday dinners, anything you need. I'm just across the floo." She smiled weakly up at him and wiped the tears away from her eyes.

"I know. You've got everything, right? Pots and pans - a strainer? Do you have a strainer?" Lily asked looking through the nearest box.

"I think so…" said Severus, watching as Lily started to riffle through the last box of kitchen stuff for the elusive strainer. James exited the guest room carrying a fast-asleep Amelia in one hand and dragging a bleary-eyed Harry by the other hand.

"Alright, we're off. Now you're sure you have everything" James said turning to Severus. Both James and Lily were looking at him the ways parents looked at their children before they boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time.

"Yes, Potter, I'm fine. Funnily enough, as an adult I can suitably manage my own affairs," said Severus defensively.

"And you do it so delightfully, Sev, really," James said with a grin. "Alright, come on, give me a hug," He raised his arms and Severus returned the hug slightly reluctantly, squeezing Amelia in between them.

"I'll see you for drinks on Thursday, alright?" James said. Severus nodded and kissed Amelia on the forehead then bent down to Harry who was staring at the floor looking downcast.

"Bye Hare-bear," he said, gently tapping the boy's chin up. Harry pitched forward and hugged him tightly.

"Bye Uncle Sev," he whispered, before retreating back to his father. For a moment, Severus looked over the slightly depressed-looking Potter family and felt as though he ought to say something to make them feel ok. The words of thanks seemed inadequate and saying that they saved his life and his soul seemed melodramatic, even with all the wine.

"I…thank you," Severus said awkwardly. "Thank you for letting me into your home, your family." James smiled, and Lily's eyes filled with tears again. She stepped forward and gave him another tight hug.

"Come on now, this is see-you-in-four-days, not goodbye," James said reasonably, boosting Amelia up further on his hip as he watched the scene fondly.

"Oh, it'll be sooner than that won't it, Sev?" she asked with her wide, glittering eyes. Severus nodded with a laugh.

"Of course." With that, they stepped into the fireplace, leaving Severus with only the whispers of their presence. A few undone dishes, pictures on the wall, rumpled sheets where Amelia and Harry had slept. Somehow those whispers made the silence in his apartment even louder.

He had spent so much of his life alone, he'd just assumed that it would come back to him, but for a moment he stood stupidly in the centre of his living room wondering what to do with himself. To do something, he cleaned the dishes, unpacked the last boxes and straightened his bedroom. No baby cried, no footsteps tread reassuringly above him, and for a moment Severus missed it. Then he realized, that there was no baby, no footsteps, and no other people.

He took a pinch of floo power and through it into the fire.

"Polly?" after a moment, her sleepy- pretty face came into view as she regarded him with some concern.

"Sev? Is everything ok?"

"Yes. I have the place to myself, you know, and since you couldn't make dinner I thought you might like a private tour." said Severus, smiling as playfully as he knew how to. Her concern turned into a wide-grin.

"I'll be right over."