Harry's mind and heart were in turmoil when he sat down on the bed. He glanced at the cupboard but shook his head firmly. No, he wouldn't. He crossed his arms and glared into space, ignoring the insistent hissing coming from Ophion's terrarium. After a while, it could have been moments, minutes, hours, his door opened. He fastened his glare onto the person to step in, but stopped when he realized it was his head of house. Professor McGonagall ignored the disrespect and quietly summoned the chair closer to her and sat down in front of him.

"Harry.", she said calmly "Your father spoke to me."

"He is not my father.", Harry retorted angrily, she gave a sad smile.

"Shall I get the adoption papers?", he looked stubborn, but didn't answer "I know you're only angry, but please never say that to his face. How would you feel if he said something similar?"

Harry's heart dropped at the mere suggestion and he instantly felt bad.

"Severus made a mistake, a pretty self absorbed, stupid mistake. But he did it out of..."

"Don't say 'he did it out of love or care'!", Harry snapped at her, scowling "You protect people you love, you give them what they need, you hug them and laugh with them. That stuff you do out of love. You don't torture people out of love."

Minerva looked at him and seemed reluctantly impressed "You are right, of course. I will rephrase it. He did what he did, out of pain. Pain and frustration and helplessness. He never was a father, he did not have time to grow into it. Then he took your responsibility and he's been doing marvellously, Harry, don't you think? It is incredibly hard for him and would be for anybody, to deal with the numerous issues that came up since he took an interest in you. He has been alone with that. And then Tobias Snape died as well. He has been under a tremendous amount of stress and worry over all of these issues and your safety. He needed a let-out."

"That doesn't make it right!", Harry thundered

"No, it doesn't.", McGonagall answered calmly "I am trying to explain, not justify. He saw them as a source the your problem. It didn't seem fair to him that they should go unpunished, while you would be suffering, perhaps forever. It was not the right thing to do. But you need to understand that it was not malice nor evil that led him. It was emotions he was ill prepared to deal with. It was not for him to decide how justice would be served. But as every parent who sees his child hurt, he was seeking revenge, probably under the false impression it would lighten his load or lessen his pain. He has never known any different."

Harry pressed his lips together and crossed his arms "I understand. But I expected... He is not a Death Eater any more and then he does something like that!"

"It was not because they were Muggles..."

"I know!", Harry said "But he planned this and repeated it. How can you say there is no malice in that?"

Minerva kept quite for a moment, before she answered "Death Eaters would do those things for sport, for enjoyment. He did not enjoy it as such. He was extracting revenge, which was wrong, but he did not do it for pleasure. That's what I mean."

Harry gulped and then shrugged "So he wasn't being a Death Eater. It doesn't make me feel much better."

Minerva nodded "I know its horrible. But try to examine your own emotions. Why are you so disgusted with what he did?"

"Because its disgusting! He was acting like them. He isn't like that, he's my Dad. He's supposed to be... different, better!"

Minerva nodded "But don't you feel even a little satisfied? Does it not make you feel like they got what they deserved?"

"No.", Harry answered immediately without thinking and then frowned. That was strange. He hated the Dursleys. They deserved to be treated like crap, to feel the way they had made him feel. They should be punished, they should be hurting. But even though he could think that, he couldn't bring himself to feel satisfied or lightened.

"Harry, have you thought about...", Minerva began, then hesitated and carefully continued "Maybe you sill feel... like you were a burden and it was your fault what happened to you. And being removed from them was more like freeing them than freeing you. So you feel like your father has robbed them of that peace again, even though you are gone and more so because he did it in the name of justice for you. You wanted them to be happy, the burden of your existence finally lifted off their shoulders and he destroyed that. You feel responsible and now you had thought that both parties could be happy and then it isn't so."

Harry's throat tightened up and he whispered thickly "They already lost Dudley, because of me. No!", he interrupted her "They loved him. They really, really loved him. You don't understand. He was their life and my father took him away. That was punishment enough, really. And they had had to put up with me for ten years, even though they never asked for it. I was dumped on them. And then I was removed and I thought 'now they will have the life they wanted'. Then I heard that Dudley had been taken away and I felt bad for them. But I thought 'They weren't treating Dudley right, too'. So it was good for him and then I could live with that. But torturing them like that... It feels unfair. They didn't ask for me, they never wanted me and still gave me all that stuff. They don't deserve to be treated like that, especially not for me."

McGonagall actually looked sick at his pronouncement and took a deep breath.

"Harry. It does not matter if they wanted you or asked for you. The moment they took you and didn't give you up to an orphanage, it was their duty to provide for you. And they did not only fail grossly at that, they intentionally hurt you. They deserve punishment. But in favour of giving you a clean transition and keeping the media away, Professor Dumbledore and your father decided against a persecution. I don't say that it is right what your father did, but it is understandable. You are worth the same as any other child and to Severus you mean the world. Seeing you hurt and seeing the people responsible for it go unpunished – he could not live with that."

Harry felt horrible and looked up at McGonagall "Professor? Can you give my father a message: I really want to see Marty."

Severus was secretly pleased with the way he had handled the situation this time. As opposed to going into shock, he had called for help. He wasn't that pleased with the way Minerva had growled "Idiot!" at him, when he had explained the situation and asked her to talk to Harry. She had been in there with him for a while now and Severus was getting nervous to the point of turning Lupin's wand in his fingers until it warmed up. He kept glancing at the door to Harry's room until he wordlessly summoned his Christmas present and whispered "My son."

The moving picture of Harry as a toddler appeared. He was excitedly chewing on the ear of a Dragon plush toy, which, being magical, frantically tried to get away from his tight grip. Harry seemed engrossed in his toy, dripping saliva all over it, himself and the floor. Snape's expression softened at the little boy in the picture. His son. He still had the same intensely concentrated look when he brewed potions or tried new spells. He stroked the cool glass beneath which the child repeatedly drooled all over his lilac dragon. Shortly Snape wondered where it had gone, the lilac dragon Harry had been so in love with. The door opened quietly and Minerva came out with a serious expression.

"Severus. Harry just requested to see Marty."

Snape jumped up at that and was nearly at the door, when Minerva held him back.

"Let me see him!"

"Severus, you are not the best person to talk to him right now.", she said coolly "I understand how you feel... but he needs some space."

Snape stared at the door, then at his friend, unsure if he should heed her advice. She grabbed his arm and steered him to the sofa "Get Marty. I will arrange for one of his godfathers to talk to him."

"Lupin is still rampant on the grounds and Black was with Dumbledore."

"The headmaster is back within the castle grounds. I will seek him out and arrange a floo call."

Snape nodded at her and before she left he said "Thanks, Minerva. I wouldn't have known..."

"Its quite alright, Severus.", she gave him an encouraging smile "We're all friends here."

That made him relax and summon the energy to contact Marty. To no one's surprise Marty was not available to talk in the middle of the night and so he waited for Black's ugly visage to pop into his grate.

"Snape.", he greeted soon after and Snape sneered.

"This is your chance, Black.", Severus said "Prove yourself. You have been appraised of the situation?"

"Yes, Sir.", Black said, not twitching a muscle to betray his mirth.

"Very funny!", Severus snapped "I'll get him, don't you dare mess this up!"

Black grumbled something but Severus was already at Harry's door and knocked.

"Harry? I couldn't get Marty, but Black wants to talk to you. I will go into my bedroom to give you privacy. Please inform me when you have finished your conversation."

With that he turned away and couldn't believe he was trusting Black to handle this. He must be as insane as the Prisoner of Azkaban.

Harry heard his father's message, then waited until he heard his bedroom door close; before he entered the empty living room.

"Sirius!", he said, kneeling in front of his face. Sirius smiled at him "You know what happened?"

"Yes, I heard.", Sirius said "I must say, I am proud of the stuck up little Slytherin."

"This is not a joke.", Harry scowled, he felt weird talking to a man who was his godfather but practically a complete stranger. And he had spent most of the year being terrified of him...

"No and I am being honest. I am proud of he way he handled it. Had it been me, Harry, I would have killed them without a second thought. When I caught up with Pettigrew that day, I wanted to do that. But I had to know why he betrayed them, that's how he got me."

"But that's not right!"

"Of course it isn't!", Black said forcefully "But when you feel guilty and sad and overall horrible for something, then you do stupid things. You do it because you wanted to protect that person and you failed. You are mad with yourself and let it out on them. Because that is exactly what they deserve. To suffer for what they did to you! You were an innocent child, left in their care, completely dependent on them. And they used you, abused you, hurt you. We love you, all of us and no one could prevent it. Can you imagine how useless that makes us feel? How disgusted we are with ourselves? How angry? You were helpless.

Leave us out of that equation for a second, would you treat a child like that? What would you do if you saw someone doing that to a baby? Would you not be angry, indignant? Would you not step in and try to safe it? Would you not want to see that person punished?" Harry had to admit, Sirius had a point "And now imagine, that is the child of your best friend. That is your nephew, your brother, your son, your friend... Anyone you love. Can you imagine how that must feel? Its not alright, he didn't do the politically correct thing. But he did what any real father would wish to do to the tormentors of his child and more! Snape restricted himself quite a lot, to be honest."

Harry looked troubled and unsure after Sirius' speech and Sirius left out the force in his voice when he continued

"Look kid. I know its hard. I know how it feels if you think you are not worthy of love. My family treated me like crap as well, because I wasn't what they wanted me to be. Until I met your dad and we founded the marauders... I felt like a useless piece of shit. Why would anyone care about me? It didn't matter if I lived or died. But then there was James and his parents, who were so wonderful and kind and welcoming. And I constantly wondered how they could care for me. I wanted to look behind my back and see if there was another Sirius standing there, that they were talking to. I know its hard to learn, but it wasn't your fault and you are worth our worry and anger and care."

Harry rubbed annoyed at his eyes and hiccuped, which made Sirius laugh.

"Its alright, kid. Go to your... to Snape. He looks like he needs a hug."

Harry laughed at that and simply said "Thanks."

Sirius nodded and vanished from the fire. Harry stood up on shaky legs and knocked on the door to his father's bedroom. He stuck his head in. His father was sitting on the bed, the frame he had given him on Christmas clutched between his hands, his shoulders and back hunched. He had raised his head at Harry's entry and looked at him with a fear that Harry knew all too well. Rejection. With just a few steps he had crossed the distance and wrapped his arms around his father's neck. Snape sighed and relaxed, putting the frame on his bedside table and pulling his son on his lap.

"Are you still angry?", he asked quietly.

"Yeah, a bit. But I'm more confused and disappointed."

Snape flinched at that.

"Why are you here then?"

"Because I need you and you need me. I'm not going away because of this. I wanted you to know."

Snape nodded silently and pressed Harry closer to himself.

"We're messed up, Dad."

"Language."

Harry laughed at that a little.

"I guess I understand why you did it. But I would have expected... I don't know. It felt so much like something a Death Eater would do..."

Snape shook his head "What kind of Death Eater would protect a child like that? They'd have to kill themselves first."

"Did you...? Back then, did you hurt people like that?", Harry whispered.

"I did not torture or kill people, no. I was the Dark Lord's Potions Master and spy. We all had our roles and I was not a foot soldier."

Harry felt a little reassured at that.

"But I will not deny that I witnessed horrible things and did nothing to prevent them."

"You couldn't have done anything, though.", Harry whispered back.

"No, in all fairness, I couldn't have. But I didn't even attempt it."

Harry leaned closer to his father and whispered "I know I shouldn't... but I want to be in my cupboard right now."

He heard his father gulp and felt him tighten his grip. There was no answer to that.

Harry was taking two steps at a time, running at top speed to the Defense classroom. He burst in without knocking to his uncle packing his belongings.

"You're really going? Why?!", he asked out of breath.

"Harry.", Lupin turned around and smiled softly at him "Dumbledore requested my notice. He wanted to give me a chance to keep my résumé clean."

"What? But why?"

"There was a... err...", Lupin struggled to find words to explain the situation, looking rather flustered.

"But uncle, you're the best DADA teacher there is. If you leave we'll have another crappy one like Lockhart.", Harry whined "And I want to be able to see you every day."

Lupin's expression softened considerably "I know, Harry. But now you have two godfathers. We'll write often and see you in Hogsmeade whenever we can, alright?"

Harry just wanted to answer, when another two students burst into the room, looking horrified. Harry had expected them to be Ron and Hermione but to his surprise they were Parvati and Lavender.

"Oh Professor! I'm so sorry.", Lavender said, looking miserable "If we had known... We thought..."

"This is so horrible! We didn't think... I'm so, so sorry, sir.", Parvati added, looking just as sorry as she said.

"What? What did you do?", Harry asked them. Lavender turned to him and said.

"Oh Harry! If we had known he's your uncle... We had heard that you had a bad living situation and we felt so bad for you..."

"Yeah, they said that's why you had had to change your guardians and we saw that your stuff was new and you were happy."

"And we wanted to look out for you, you know.", Lavender said, wringing her hands "And then it looked so suspicious... you and Professor Lupin."

"Oh god!", Harry spat disgusted "You thought...? You thought he was...? Merlin!"

"Yeah.", Parvati said in small voice "Lavender saw you hugging and there was other stuff... That's not something you do with a professor... Oh Harry, we're so sorry!"

"And then, what did you do?", Harry asked mortified

"Lavender's mum knows someone in the ministry and she wrote her. She has started the investigation..."

Lupin stopped her there "You wanted to protect Harry, I understand. Don't feel sorry, it was a misunderstanding. I wish you had talked to Harry first, but what's done is done. I got a formal letter from the ministry, stating that an investigation had started. I consulted Dumbledore and he said it was the end of the year and better to give in my notice than have this investigation ruin my reputation. He made that deal with them, you see. If I leave immediately they will not investigate."

"That's weird.", Harry said, thinking that this could easily be misused by someone who was not innocent.

"Indeed, but they trust Dumbledore and he said that he'd investigate himself and if there was anything wrong he would bring me in personally. Of course he knows about our relationship and was only placating them."

"But couldn't you say you are my godfather, then that would finish it off without you having to leave."

"No.", Lupin gave a sad smile "Even though your... guardian gracefully calls me your godfather, officially I am nothing but a friend of your late parents."

Harry looked so dejected at that, that Lavender and Parvati gave him a hug and said sorry again before leaving.

"I am glad your house mates keep an eye out for you.", Lupin said softly

"Yeah, great.", Harry said, plopping himself into the visitor's chair the next moment

"Harry, I want to make something clear. I would have resigned anyway.", Lupin said, sitting down himself "I turned into a werewolf, I forgot the potion. I endangered all the students and staff at this school. If it wasn't for Sirius... I cannot with good conscience stay here after I've done a mistake like that. And it would be only a matter of time until people realized what I was and started opposing my position here."

Harry looked up sadly at that and said "But you are the best. I want you here."

"I know, sweetie.", Lupin said smiling and Harry felt himself blushing at the affectionate title and wondered if he had ever been called something like that before. 'Pumpkin head' was the only thing that came close he realized and suddenly didn't resent the stupid name that much any more.

It had been weird with his father lately. He seemed to be on pins and needles around him and Harry couldn't bring himself to alleviate his worries. He didn't know how he felt. He didn't know how to forgive him for something he wasn't even sure he was angry about any more. Or maybe it wasn't so much anger but a sense of... He couldn't pinpoint it and that frustrated him. A frown graced his features that made Lupin prompt "Everything alright?"

Harry looked at him confused and then said "Uncle... About my dad... I mean Severus..." Remus smiled and nodded, he always needed to clarify that so Lupin understood which dad he was talking about right now "The way he avenged himself on the Dursleys... Or not himself, but me... I talked to Professor McGonagall and Sirius and even Marty. I understand a lot of it and I'm not angry any more... Still, I can't forgive him. What's wrong with me?"

He looked so desperate that Lupin leaned forward to close a bit of distance between them "Nothing is wrong with you Harry. It is always difficult to accept that the people we love are not perfect. Normally children grow up learning and seeing the faults of their parents. Even though they worship them at times and cannot listen to other people pointing out their flaws – they know their parents aren't perfect. You can see this phenomenon around siblings. When they talk about their parents they are quick to point out their flaws, because they feel safe in doing so. Their siblings love their parents as much as they do. You neither remember your real parents nor do you have siblings. Severus has been your saviour and you went through a phase of silent worship for him. You thought he could do no wrong and forgave him his past mistakes. But the deal with the Dursleys brought you back to earth quite forcibly. You share no blood with Severus and have not lived long enough with him to take on parts of his personality. So it is hard for you to understand how he feels, how he could do that – repeatedly. It is not something in your being to be vindictive and cruel. Severus has grown up that way, he never knew a lot of kindness. It seems alien to you and you fear that some day you will be the recipient of it. You fear that you made a mistake when you forgave him."

Harry's heart was beating fast at Lupins pronouncement. Yes! Yes, this was it. He had not been able to say so, even to himself. But had he made the wrong decision in choosing Severus? Should he – could he? – go back and change it? Did he want to?

"I am not going to sugar coat or lie to you, Harry.", Lupin said seriously "It is entirely possible that one day his dark side will take over and lash out to you" Harry shuddered "But I can promise you, that he will fight to reign it in, he will do anything in his power. He is good, because he fought to be good. Hurting you would be loosing that fight. He will not loose, he will try anything to win. You are his second chance at life and he has not known the kindness of a second chance. He will not waste it. He loves you. It is not my decision to make, but remember that he loves you."

Harry felt how dry his mouth was. Was this it? He had to decide. Again, it was on his shoulders – a thirteen year old – to decide about things that could affect the rest of his life. He hung his head. How in the world was he to make that decision?

"You have your mother's heart and your father's courage, Harry.", Remus said softly "You will do the right thing – whatever it is – I am sure."

Harry's feet were walking him down to the dungeons on his own and he found himself in the laboratory in front of Severus before he even realized it.

"Good. Take off the robe, up with those sleeves.", Snape said back to business when he saw him "The Draught of Living Death has the right fumes, you said? We will have to capture them and test..."

"Daddy."

Severus looked up sharply and stopped his motions. Harry never called him that, except there was imminent danger or emotional upheaval. "Harry?"

"Can I talk to you about something?"

Severus let his arms drop to his sides in a defeated manner and nodded. He followed Harry into their living room and sat down. This felt surreal. Like he was the child and Harry the adult.

"I talked to uncle Remus.", Harry explained "And he said a lot of stuff and now I understand... you know, why I was so weird to you lately."

"The Dursleys. It's about them.", Severus said tersely and Harry nodded.

"I would never do that. When the moment of revenge comes... I know I can picture it all out. I know I can think of all the things I would love to do to them or see happen to them. But if you gave me the power and I was standing in front of them... I wouldn't do it."

"I know.", Severus said, hiding his face in his hands "You are too good, too..."

Harry interrupted him "But you did and I... I thought for a moment: What if you did something like that to me?"

Severus looked up and Harry saw how horrified he looked at that pronouncement. He opened his mouth, maybe to assure him he never would, and then closed it again. Harry's heart was beating hard again, he didn't know what to say, he did not have a decision.

"Can I...?", Severus started and Harry nodded, letting him take control of the conversation "I did what I did because I wanted to quench the hurt I felt for you. It is not your fault, you did not inspire this. It is the way I deal with a difficult situation, when I don't know what else to do. I am trying to change, Harry. But when it comes to you... you are too important to me. To see you hurt makes me forget all restraints. I am amazed that I could hold myself back as much as I did." Harry remembered Sirius saying something similar "But don't you remember, Harry? When I told you about my childhood, the way Tobias had treated me... You said you couldn't forgive him, that you did not want anything to have to do with him any more. I said then that it is hard to forgive crimes against oneself but near impossible to forgive those committed against people we cherish."

Harry looked up at this and something bloomed inside of him. Severus was right. He had not done that because the Dursleys had hurt him but because they had hurt his son, Harry. It felt inconceivable to him that anybody would feel this strongly for him. Marty had said something like that, as had McGonagall. But now he really understood it. He would forgive people for committing crimes against himself. But if those people would hurt anyone he loved – Hermione, Ron, Remus, Minerva, Severus – he didn't know if he could find it in himself to forgive them. Wouldn't he want to avenge them? If he was given the power, would he not want to hurt them the way they had hurt his loved one? Would he be able to stop and forgive? He doubted it, even though he could not be sure. But it answered his question. Severus would not turn his ire towards him. Even if Harry hurt himself, Severus would never hurt him. Suddenly he smiled and then he said casually "So, what about the Draught of Living Death?"

Severus smiled back and gave him a hand to stand up again. Somehow they had resolved this. Severus didn't feel quite sure that it was off the table. Harry did not understand what a war did to people, of course he couldn't. After his abusive childhood Severus had gone on to be a soldier in a war. He had lost everything in that war and closed himself off. Emotionally, he still felt as unsure and unstable as the young man he was when the first war ended. He had not matured after that. Then again, these last two years had changed him profoundly. He had matured then. It came back to Harry, it always came back to him.

Harry wondered shortly how strange they must look together. Ron with his new pet owl Pig, Hermione with Crookshanks and him with Ophion. They were sitting in the grass in front of the Black Lake and playing with their pets. Pig excitedly flew around their heads and Crookshanks tried to catch him playfully. Ophion, as always, was snuggled up on Harry's wrist and enjoying being stroked along his head and back by his master. Harry sometimes wondered who was the master between the two of them.

"Did Ophion find some friends then?", Hermione asked, keeping her eyes firmly on Crookshanks to prevent him from hurting the fluffy little owl Sirius had given Ron.

"He likes to talk to some of his kind but he seems to be a loner.", Harry said "Doesn't have any real close friends, other than me."

Hermione smiled "A bit like Professor Snape."

Harry looked up surprised "He has other people."

"Yeah, but not like you.", Hermione said

"Hmm.", Harry murmured and dropped his voice when he continued "But he doesn't have any other kids."

Hermione smiled softly "And he doesn't have any other family. He lost his father and you said his mother died when he was younger. He doesn't have siblings as well and you didn't meet anyone else during Christmas. No one else came to the burial of Tobias, did they?"

Now that Hermione had said it, Harry wondered about that. No, there had been no one from the Snape family. Severus had said he had no contact with the Prince family, even that he was the sole heir to their fortune. That had to mean there was no one else left to inherit. "He has McGonagall and Dumbledore. They're friends."

"But not family.", Hermione said "You're his family."

"Yeah, but if Remus and Sirius are my family and I am his family that makes them..."

"Nothing to Snape.", Ron said "Aunt Muriel is related to us but I wouldn't call her family if had a choice. Don't tell mum."

Harry and Hermione chuckled at that "What do you suggest then?"

Hermione shrugged "I was just observing."

Harry let himself fall into the grass behind him and stared into the sky "How about Professor Sinistra?"

Silenced followed that pronouncement.

"I think they like each other.", Harry continued "They'd make a good couple."

"Harry...", Hermione said, sounding uncomfortable

"No, no!", Harry said, frowning and staring hard into the sky "Its not like I want a mum or something. Its just, he has no one other than me, I want him to be happy. I think she would make him happy."

"Harry!", Ron said, sounding alarmed

"No, listen.", Harry said "She was really nice to him when Tobias died and she is beautiful and smart. They'd make a good couple. I bet she's strong too. All Hogwarts Professors seem strong. They would be good together, don't you think?"

Harry sat up at that to see their faces and froze. Now he realized what his friends had been trying to say.

"If you get the incredibly stupid idea into your head to play matchmaker, I will find the most disgusting, arduous chores I can imagine to keep your little pumpkin head occupied.", Snape hissed lowly, a frown perched on his features, looming down on him. Harry gave a sheepish smile.

"But Dad...!"

Snape suddenly spun around, checking the shadows around them and sent him a warning glare, Harry clasped his hands onto his mouth "I mean, Professor."

Severus rolled his eyes and motioned for him to stand up "You should not be lazing about anyway. Shouldn't you be preparing for end of year examinations? And I want your potions project finished before the exams start. You don't need that distraction."

Harry pouted and said goodbye to his friends, following his father. After a moment, they had just entered the dungeons, he said "When can I tell people?"

"Tell what?", Snape said, opening the door to his office and leading him in. Harry waited until the door was closed before he elaborated.

"That you are my father."

Snape gave a thin, sad smile at that "Not too soon, Harry. Pettigrew has gone to rejoin his master. If the prophecy is correct, he is working on coming back."

"But if he was with us all the time... Dad! He will tell him about you and me."

Severus shook his head "Probably he will, but I can turn this to our advantage. Say I am controlling you, trying to pull you to our side. He tried it that first time you encountered him."

"But in the chamber you fought him! Doesn't he know what happened then?"

Snape frowned "The headmaster assures me it was not his consciousness that was manifested in the chamber the way it had with the Philosopher's Stone. He will not know what happened then."

"How can he be sure?", Harry asked worried "What if he knows, what if he doesn't believe you? He will hurt you."

Suddenly that age old fear took hold of Harry again and he looked much younger, pleading with unseen forces to protect his home and family "Promise me."

Snape frowned "Promise you what?"

"You won't go back to him. If he comes back, you won't go to him.", Harry was pleading, begging him. He took hold of Severus robes and tried to shake him.

"Harry!", Severus said, shocked, holding his hands on top of Harry's but not prying them away "I cannot promise you that..."

"Please!", Harry said, pushing his head into Severus chest almost painfully "I can't loose you."

And Severus understood. He had felt this way so often. With his own mother, with Lily, with Harry. He wrapped his arms around the boy who had lost so much in his short life and rested his chin on Harry's head.

"That is something you and I have to understand, Harry. I feel like a hypocrite saying it, but I want to believe it is true.", Severus said quietly "Those who die, never leave us. As long as we love them, they are part of us."

He thought of Tobias and realized. Even if you didn't love them, people who had touched your soul were a part of you. Harry let out a little sob but didn't cry otherwise, his head still pressed against his father "I can't take it."

"You won't be alone. Albus will take care of you if something happens to me. And Minerva. Your godfathers will be there and your friends."

"But you won't!", Harry said and swallowed "I don't... I want..."

"I know.", Snape said simply "But don't worry. I am still very much alive and you won't get rid of me that easily. I survived one war already. Chances are high I will do it again."

That was a lie. And they both knew it. But it was soothing all the same.

Harry was crossing through sentences and rewriting them on the end a long parchment. He was working on the conclusion of his potions project paper with a Snape-like frown on his face. Snape glanced at him from time to time, amused by this. Harry finally let out a sigh and took out fresh parchment to copy his paper down again – this time cleaned up.

"You are finished revising?"

Harry looked up and nodded "Give it here then."

Harry obediently stood up, then gathered up his parchment and gave it to Severus. "I will look it over and you can rewrite it afterwards."

"OK, thanks.", Harry said, then hesitated before asking "Will you help me with preparing for exams, Papa?"

Snape smiled, satisfied with the way Harry had turned to him for help and was taking his studies seriously. Miss Granger seemed to have an effect on him.

"I will, but not tonight." Harry raised his eyebrows "Today we will have a little campfire."

"Campfire?" Harry laughed "Where?"

"We are invited at the Burrow. All adults in your life want to share the experience."

"What experience?"

Snape gestured for Harry to follow him into his room. Harry entered his room in their quarters. It looked like always.

"Accio Dudley's clothes.", Severus said and they zoomed out from different places, one shoe flying out underneath Harry's bed, a shirt hitting Harry in the back of his head, because it had come out of the laboratory. Snape peeled it off Harry's hair with a disgusted look "What was this doing in the lab?"

"I dried cauldrons with it."

Snape raised an amused eyebrow at that and threw it onto the pile of clothes in front of their feet.

"If you feel ready we would like to burn them.", he said calmly to Harry, who, to his own surprise, started grinning

"That sounds cool!"

Snape smirked at that "I imagine there will be some personal items in there. You can fish them out and burn them in the fire before we floo."

Harry dived into the pile, picking out underwear to burn before they left. Snape left him to it and later on flooed with him to the Burrow. Harry was hugged by Molly, Remus and Sirius in welcome and they all lead him outside. Minerva and Albus were sitting on folding chairs, talking contently and drinking from heavy tumblers. They looked up and greeted him warmly as the others began assembling chairs around their fire. Snape levitated the old cast-offs to them, distributing a small pile in front of everyone.

"Marty said it could be cleansing to get rid of these and... talk a bit.", he said and sat down.

"Talk about what?", Harry said and looked around

"I will start, my boy.", Dumbledore said and picked up a rather hideous sock with holes large enough to stick two fingers though "A bit of soul baring in front of fellow warriors."

He threw the sock in which went up into flames with a satisfying sizzle "I did not know the extent of their negligence and abuse, Harry. If I had, you would not have stayed there."

Harry blinked and opened his mouth slightly. His father put a hand on his and shook his head. McGonagall was next. She fished the matching sock out of her pile and threw it in "I had thought they were the worst kind of Muggles. But I did nothing to prevent their guardianship and I didn't check on you."

Sirius, Remus, the Weasleys and Severus followed with their regrets and one piece of clothing. Harry felt touched at their courage to speak up and say they had been wrong. That they were sorry. It felt good. It was his turn and he swallowed. He didn't know what to say. They all kept saying it wasn't his fault but he could remember a thousand occasions when he could have stood up for himself and told someone. He had kept quiet. But Marty had explained that was normal behavior for abused children. He looked at them and then settled for a different approach. He picked up a jumper that was so large, he could fit in three times. As he threw it in the fire he said to Severus

"When you hugged me that first time after asking me if they abused me and I declined... Even then I felt like I was home. I had never felt so good in my life, so... content. Thank you."

Snape opened his mouth, wonder written in his eyes, that sparked strangely in the fire light. Harry picked up a trouser he had had to fold up several times to make it fit his height "Uncle Remus, when we spent those few days together in the summer it felt like I had gotten a piece of my father back. You were always like a shadow of James, like he left something for me to remember him by."

Like this he took turns, telling them all what they had given him and how he appreciated it. The pile of clothes was soon reduced and then diminished. The fire was dancing merrily and they had started chatting to each other in quiet tones. Harry was staring into the fire, content and comfortable, the low voices lulling him to sleep. He felt someone put a blanket around him and tuck it in. He slowly opened his eyes to see Sirius smiling down at him. "Sleep.", he ordered softly and slid his hand from Harry's messy hair down over his face, effectively closing his eyes. Harry sighed quietly, he was safe.

When Harry flew that weekend it felt like the sweetest broom ride of his life. Below him in the stands Severus was sitting, flanked by the Gryffindor Head of House and the former Defense teacher, who had brought a curious black dog with him. In the Gryffindor stands he could make out his friends – one head with flaming red hair, the other wild brown locks. He felt complete when swishing through the air, searching for the Golden Snitch. He spotted Cho following him with her eyes rather than the game and grinned. It was a good day. He dived and made a bit of a show on his firebolt, earning cheers from the crowd. Malfoy on the opposing team looked ready to puke with jealousy. Harry grinned at him and said "All that gold you have Malfoy and you cannot even find a little flying piece?"

"Well, I have no need for it. Other than you!", Malfoy retorted angrily.

"Tell me, who is sitting on the world class broom?", Harry asked.

"Oh Potter, don't be so smug.", Malfoy answered, suddenly grinning himself "That you've gone up from rags to that" he nodded at Harry's jeans peaking out from underneath his flying robes "Doesn't mean anything. And don't think we don't know where its coming from, you little-"

But Malfoy didn't finish his sentence as he had to drop suddenly and follow Harry, who was speeding insanely fast to the ground. He closed his fingers around the Snitch and made a mad upturn, almost colliding with the grass. He slowly rose upwards, holding the fluttering ball high above his head.

"Gryffindor wins! Gryffindor wins the match and the Quidditch Cup!", Lee Jordon screamed at the top of his lungs, barely managing to be heard above the deafening cheers of his house mates. Hermione and Ron were hugging and jumping up and down. His team mates collided with him in a mid air hug, Oliver crying with joy. Harry saw, in between the arms surrounding and squeezing him, that Severus was shaking Minerva's hand, who had leaned close and was whispering something in his ear, making his lips twitch. Harry was brought back to the ground, other Gryffindors rushing onto the field, hugging him. Finally his friends turned up, taking their turn, Hermione even kissing his nose. He grinned at all of them, accepting their thanks and congratulations, looking happily on as Katie and the other chasers tried to calm down Oliver. It was Professor McGonagall, firmly patting his back a few times, that made him look up with an almost crazy grin. He couldn't have looked happier if he had gotten 12 NEWTs.

Harry glanced up at the staff stand again and his eyebrows rose to his hairline as Professor Sinistra had made her way to Severus and was talking to him. She was smiling faintly and he was looking not quite so severe. They were holding hands in a forgotten handshake while she said something to him. Finally, she let go and left, Snape turning to him, which made Harry think they had been talking about him, and roll his eyes at the look he received from his son. Anything seemed possible now, Harry thought and grinned up at the staff stands. His godfathers were staying at a place called Grimmauldplace and had already invited him to visit over the summer. He'd go to the Weasleys as well. But most he was looking forward to a summer with his dad. Who cared about Pettigrew and Voldemort, when this summer was all his?

Harry yawned and stretched while walking into the kitchen at Spinners End.

"Fourteen years old and still no manners.", Severus said, not taking his eyes off the paper he was reading, Harry grinned and plopped down in front of him "What do you plan on doing today?"

"Well, we're all invited at the Weasleys.", Harry said "You are coming, right?"

Snape looked up from his paper and frowned at him "You want me to come?"

"Of course!", Harry said, frowning back

"Well, then it seems I have no choice in the matter."

Harry smiled at that and bit into his waffle, letting out a satisfied moan at the taste. Snape raised an eyebrow at that and muttered "No manners at all!"

Harry grinned with his mouth full of waffles and chewed, lost in thought. He rubbed at his scar distractedly, imagining what he wanted to do today at the Weasleys.

"Is your scar bothering you?"

"Huh?", Harry asked, coming out of his reverie "Oh, yeah it has been twinging lately."

Snape frowned at him again, but this time it was because he was thoughtful and worried "When?"

"Mostly in the mornings.", Harry said and shrugged "Does it mean anything?"

"I do not know.", Snape admitted and let his eyes fall back onto the paper, the frown staying in place. He seemed to decide that now was not the time to discuss the matter and Harry was glad. He did not want this to ruin his birthday. He was going be with his family, with Severus, Remus, Sirius, the Weasleys and Hermione... "Do you mind?"

Harry looked up startled "What?"

"I will send you on to the Weasleys and come in a little later.", Snape repeated.

"Err... That's alright, I guess. But where are you going?"

Severus seemed to turn the page a little too casually as he said "I have something to do in Hogwarts."

"What?", Harry asked curiously and watched his father's shoulders tense.

"A colleague needs a consultation. There is a joint project we want to pursue."

Harry blinked "Professor Sprout? What project?"

"No, not Sprout. But it is about ingredients and their harvesting time.", Severus said and Harry frowned. Snape was making quite the show of not naming this mysterious colleague and suddenly Harry grinned widely.

"You're talking about Aurora... I mean, Professor Sinistra."

Snape frowned at the paper, not looking up "Yes."

Silence followed and Snape looked up, too curious not to check Harry's expression "Stop that infernal grinning! Its for science."

"Of course it is!", Harry laughed, glad to be able to tease Snape about something. He hadn't heard the end of it about Cho since they were back and was quite excited to give back as good as he had gotten "Pouring over the lunar charts in the middle of the night together... under the stars. I bet it will be all professional."

"Oh do grow up!", Snape snapped and Harry noticed that he was strictly avoiding Harry's eyes.

"And I don't mind if you come in later. Not at all.", Harry grinned again and then said "Actually you can invite her to the Burrow... Oh no! No, that wouldn't be romantic at all. How about you spend the day with her, I don't mind. What are you going to wear anyway?"

At that Snape balled up a tissue and threw it at Harry, smiling a bit when he hit him on the nose. Harry just laughed and couldn't help but notice later that Snape had taken great care in choosing his clothing.

Harry had had a great birthday and to his surprise his father had spent his day with Sinistra. He felt a little hurt at that but pushed it away. He had suggested it after all! He was laying in bed now, under the sheets in Ron's bedroom. Ron had been called out to help clean up and left grumbling. Someone knocked at the door and Harry wondered who that would be. No one knocked at the Weasleys, maybe it was Hermione. "Yes?"

His father came in and Harry smiled at him. Harry saw him look at his duffel bag at the foot of his bed and frown slightly. Harry imagined he had seen his food box there. Harry still didn't feel comfortable leaving for the night without provisions. He sat down on Harry's bed and said

"I am sorry Harry. I hadn't wanted to stay away all day. It did take long with Aurora but it was another reason that I was detained." He fished something out of his robes and held out two tickets to Harry, Harry took them and let out a shriek of surprise "Happy birthday, Harry."

"The Quidditch World Cup! Oh my god, Dad, you're the best!", Harry exclaimed, looking at the tickets with reverence "They are really good too"

“The Weasleys got the same tickets and I wanted you to share the experience with them. As it is the whole Weasley Clan as well as Miss Granger will go to the World Cup with you.”

"We will all go?", Harry asked excitedly "That's awesome, Dad."

Snape smiled "It took a bit of time to get them on this short notice, that's why I couldn't come earlier, pumpkin head."

Harry smiled at the tickets and felt quite generous now "Did you have fun with Aurora?"

Snape frowned and said "We made a plan of how to proceed with the project, if that's what you mean."

"No, I mean 'Did you have fun?'"

Snape shook his head, stroking Harry's hair out of his eyes "Nothing has changed, Harry. The only serious commitment I have is you and I plan to leave it that way."

"But why?", Harry whined

"You don't know what you're asking, child.", Snape whispered "Do you really want to share me with someone? You don't know yet how people in love behave. She would take up a lot of my time, attention and emotions."

"You don't have to marry her immediately", Harry said wisely "You can just date."

"Harry...", Snape warned "I told you, I am no one for easy relationships. Either it is serious or nothing at all. I am serious with you, you need me more than you think. And I want to be here for you now. You will grow up fast. Soon you will not be like this..."

He left his sentence unfinished, still stroking Harry's hair fondly. Harry blinked at him "This...?"

"You're fourteen now and you will want girls to do this to you instead of your old dad."

Harry flushed red at the thought of Cho sitting close and stroking his hair like that. "Dad!"

Snape chuckled and said "I want to enjoy it while it lasts. Aurora has been here for years and she will be in years to come. She or someone else. But there will be no going back to this."

Harry looked at Snape, trying to understand him. He leaned into the hand. Yeah, he was fourteen now. But as long as there was no one else there, he enjoyed being close to Severus and getting all this attention. And the caresses, too, he could admit to himself. Of course some day he would probably stop wanting his father to show affection like this. But to his own shame he did not think that would be too soon, even though he did like the thought of Cho doing that too. But that was different. Snape tapped his head playfully "No shame in that."

Harry blinked, how did he know what Harry was thinking? Was he that easy to read?

"The Dursleys were negligent in more than one aspect. Its alright to take as much of it as you want."

Harry shrugged, not wanting to talk about them. He glanced at the door before he sat up and hugged his father "Thanks for the tickets, Papa. Love you."

Severus wrapped his arms around him and hugged him closely "I never thought I'd have a son." He kissed the crown of his head "I love you too."

"Aww! I love you too!"

They broke apart and Harry threw a cushion at Ron, who was doubling over laughing at their identical shocked expressions. When Ron hugged the cushion and grinned, Harry grinned back. Ron wasn't the most sensitive of his friends but he understood him. Sometimes he was even incredibly insightful. He was just teasing Harry, because he was happy for him. For now he had what they had had all along. A parent.