A World Of Grey Clouds by Livia Ethelind
Summary: To the world Harry Potter is either a deranged freak or a celebrated hero, but the truth about Harry and the secret the child carries is about to turn the world upside down - not only Harry's but Snape's as well!
Categories: Parental Snape > Biological Father Snape, Teacher Snape > Professor Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Draco, Dumbledore, Hermione, McGonagall, Pomfrey, Ron
Snape Flavour: Snape is Depressed, Snape is Mean, Snape is Stern
Genres: Angst, Drama, Family, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Girl!Harry, Resorting, Slytherin!Harry, Snape-meets-Dursleys
Takes Place: 1st summer before Hogwarts, 1st Year, 2nd summer
Warnings: Abusive Dursleys, Physical Punishment Spanking, Neglect, Profanity, Violence
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 35 Completed: No Word count: 158605 Read: 151861 Published: 07 Feb 2016 Updated: 19 Feb 2018
Breeze blowing by Livia Ethelind
Author's Notes:
Thoughts before the new beginning

- see Chapter End Notes!
”I'm not sure about this,” mumbled Victoria hesitantly as she paced outside the door. Professor McGonagall was sitting behind her and was reading some manner of report. This summer she had apparently been doing quite a bit of overtime as she not only had to deal with her usual mountain of work but also had to fill in for Dumbledore. This was just another interruption and Victoria felt rather guilty that she was the cause of all this. ”I am sure you will do well, Harry,” said the professor tiredly, never looking up from her reading material.

A few weeks had passed and to Victoria these had been arguably some of the strangest weeks of her life – and that was saying something. Ever since she'd gotten back from Hermione's house she'd settled in to Snape's quarters. There was a strange thought! The summer days seemed to fly by as she had been sending letters to Ron and Hermione almost every day. Ron was quite eager to come and see her but McGonagall didn't have the time to oversee them and Snape couldn't possibly seeing as Ron wasn't to know anything. Victoria had asked him one night over dinner if she could go to Ron's house and see him but Snape had simply looked at her in a way that made her feel stupid for asking and rather sternly told his soup that after her misadventures with Hermione he didn't trust her off the Hogwarts grounds and that she should be glad that were all the consequences of it. Speaking of which, the wards around the grounds had been strengthened. This now meant no one but members of staff with wands could actually walk off or onto the grounds. That had caused a bit of trouble for Filch and Hagrid who had to be escorted but it meant that no one could sneak in and thus, upon the return of Madam Hooch from a minor vacation, meant that Victoria got permission to fly. Of course Snape didn't give it willingly. Victoria had been brought to lunch in the Great Hall and there Madam Hooch and McGonagall had decided Victoria could fly on the Quidditch pitch with Hooch watching. Snape of course could say nothing without blowing his cover. Later he muttered that she might as well fly lest he had to suffer her whining all summer. They seemed to be falling into a sort of routine. They would have their meals silently (though not through any fault of hers) in the dungeons. Occasionally she'd go to the Great Hall for lunch and conversation. She'd read in the library or work on her summer assignments. When Madam Hooch had the time or was working of something at the pitch Victoria would fly. She'd taken to following Hagrid around quite a bit and on occasion professor Sprout as she tended to the plants in the green houses. She only really worried about observing the rather mysterious man who happened to be her father and try not to get into trouble with anyone. She hadn't thought about anything because she hadn't wanted to.

”I don't know. What if..” said Victoria quietly as she nervously bit her index finger. McGonagall's papers were then lowered and the professor gave her a stern but exhausted look. ”It will be fine. It needs to be done and you know that very well. Stick to what you've practised and you will be fine.”

She'd practised all right. Snape had paced back and forth all yesterday evening and quizzed her on her story and she felt like she was right back in his classroom – well, technically she was in his classroom but the nervousness and feeling of being completely lost that she remembered so well from classes made an appearance. Especially because now for the first time since those initial lessons she actually wanted to answer correctly. Still, Snape provided no praise. Simply, the constant reminder of the importance of what they were doing.

”Minerva, I think we are ready to begin!” said the Headmaster as he appeared from a doorway. Victoria gulped. She followed McGonagall into a well-lit room where a small table and two chairs were set out. The occupant of one of them rose from his seat to great them. He appeared to be a man in his late 20's with sleek brown hair, a rather scruffy green coat and an excited smile.

”Professor McGonagall!” he exclaimed as he eagerly shook the older witch's hand. ”And this must be... Miss Evans? Miss Evans! Oh, I cannot describe what a delight it is to finally meet the boy.. erh.. the girl-who-lived!”

”Calm yourself, Mr Linnet,” said McGonagall. ”We do not have all day and I'm certain you are eager to begin.” Victoria remained quiet as a clam while she studied the man's rather sincere looking face. Snape had told her he'd be a former Gryffindor and a young man McGonagall had personally vouched for – although Snape did not not look like that weighed anything with him. ”Of course! Of course!” replied Mr Linnet and retreated to the table where Victoria noticed a stack of parchment with a strange yellow quill which appeared to be standing on its tip unaided. ”You have half an hour. I trust that will be sufficient,” said McGonagall and nodded before she headed for the door.

”Won't you sit down?” asked Mr Linnet. ”Sure,” nodded Victoria and took the other seat. ”I'm sorry,” said the clearly flustered man. ”I'm rather new to this.” He smiled at her and Victoria found herself more curious than nervous. ”Aren't you a journalist?” she questioned.

”Well, yes,” he shrugged. ”Only I don't really do interviews that often. Mostly... Sports. I'm freelance,” he said as though he was apologising for it.

”Quidditch?” asked Victoria, now completely comfortable with Mr Linnet though that might be his intention. He had to be at least 28. At least! I wonder if he was at Hogwarts while mum and Snape was there? She wasn't entirely sure how old Snape was at this point to be honest.

”Yes, exactly,” replied Mr Linnet. ”Shall we begin? Miss Evans, it comes as quite a shock to us all! To your knowledge how did these extraordinary events unfold?” said Mr Linnet as the quill suddenly began moving of its own accord.

Victoria wasn't sure how long it had been before McGonagall entered to room to announce that time was up. She sat through the entire interview pinching her thigh as she struggled to remember the details of her story. How her stepfather had made an error, how no one noticed, how she was raised as a boy.

”Why did your relatives make that decision?” Mr Linnet had questioned her.

”Well, they aren't exactly very rational people,” replied Victoria as she struggled to get out the word rational. ”They didn't want me to be a witch either. In fact they tried very hard to prevent me from attending Hogwarts. I guess they preferred a boy.”

Mr Linnet nodded and the quill scribbled. Victoria wasn't quite sure who came up with that angle but she had no problem portraying the Dursleys as rather off. And it wasn't completely untrue. She continued to explain that she had not spoken up earlier as she wasn't aware that there was anything wrong with it and thought that she was expected to live this way. All in all she was painting the picture of a poor unfortunate girl, stuck with strange muggles who had been liberated. Again, not untrue. Snape had said multiple times that the closer they could stick to the truth, the more convincing her few lies would be. The wizarding community held a large number of people who already believed muggles were backwards and uninformed and they would believe her. Before leaving, Mr Linnet took a photograph of Victoria standing next to professor McGonagall to hand to the Daily Prophet when he submitted the article. The following day it appeared on the front page. Victoria watched her own unsure face staring back from newspaper hiding Snape's face.



Sybill Patricia Trelawney rarely found herself confused by anything other than the people around her. She was confused as to why they did not believe, why they would not open themselves and why it was so hard for them to take her seriously. She was after all from a line of seers, many of whom had been legendary. Her great-great-grandmother Cassandra Trelawney had been celebrated but no one seemed to see the true potential of Sybill except for Albus Dumbledore and even he had taken some time to convince. She remembered with some amusement how he had seemingly turned during her interview. She was certain he had been in the middle of dismissing her - yes he had! And then suddenly – she couldn't remember clearly why, he had offered her the position. Albus Dumbledore confused her greatly. After employing her he had spoken with her from time to time but for the most part she had been allowed to remain in her tower alone which suited her very well. This summer however things had changed and she was very surprised to have him knocking on her door just as she was about to turn in for the night one evening.

She looked at the suitcases on her table which had not yet been unpacked. She did not enjoy travelling. The Headmaster knew that very well. She did not enjoy working much either – she hoped he did not know that. She did not understand the task she had been set. He probably knew that. She did not like to be kept in the dark – she was a seer after all! And he had asked her not to come down again until start of term. She would not have liked to anyway but she still felt rather slighted by it none the less – even if he had assured her it was not because they did not want her. There was something... Sybill had a feeling she should understand what this was about but it was lost in the whirlwind of her thoughts.



Victoria was alone in a room that had become her own much too quickly because she had never had one before it. The stillness of the castle above her seemed to be somehow filling her ears. She was acutely aware of every empty hallways and, she imagined, every wandering mouse and floating ghost. She was seated on her bed with her legs drawn up and her back against the wall. She was staring into the darkness around her. She was shaking.

These last weeks had been a blur to her and she did not know what to make of it all. She felt left behind somehow. Like the world had moved too fast for her liking. Everything had been so chaotic and new and scary and terrible and wonderful and confusing and... And it was like she had been faced with one major decision after another without ever really having time time to comprehend to magnitude of everything that was happening to her. But this evening something had happened which sent it all crashing back down on her. She had been obliged to eat by herself as Snape said he had work to do and when Victoria had asked him why she could not just go to the Great Hall to eat, he had replied in passing that the other professor had work to do too as the students would be arriving the day after tomorrow. It had to be past midnight now. In the early hours of the last day she had before the other students would arrive. She was scared. No, scratch that! She was terrified.

Firstly, the was the matter of actually having to look everyone in the eyes – like this. She knew she would have Hermione there and Ron too but... What about everyone else. She gulped and slowly swayed back and forth. People where going to make so much fun of her. She just knew it. Or worse! They were going to stare at her and whisper. She had already experienced that once when she first came to Hogwarts. She had been constantly looking over her shoulder and fearing that she might know her secrets. And know that was going to repeat itself all over again. She would have different secrets and their reason for whispering would not be her fame but her freakishness. And what about Malfoy?

That brought her to the second thing. She knew something her best friends did not. She knew that the adults had basically insisted on resorting her without her having any say in it and the stupid mouldy hat had betrayed her! If Victoria had been within firing range of that hat right now she would have burned it to ashes and made good of her threat from her first year. She clenched her fists. That hat knew she wanted to be a lion! It should not be allowed to do it over! And what was her friends going to say? Would they even talk to her? Would anyone? It was enough to make her sick. In fact it did. Her stomach hurt and she felt like she was going to throw up but she could not tell whether it was only due to her discomfort or whether staying up so late also played a part. And worst of all. She had said they were going to make her go up with the first years to prove that the hat had really made that decision. Victoria did not know when she finally fell asleep but at one point she became too exhausted and sleep she did.



”You're unusually quiet.” Victoria glared at her cereal. It was a stupid remark. They never spoke when they ate and she had given up on trying. ”I'm eating,” she replied sullenly. There was a rustle of paper from the other side of the table. ”Mhmm,” Snape replied. There was silence for a moment as Victoria moved the now milk soaked and completely gross cereal around with her spoon as she had done for the last five minutes. ”Where were you yesterday?” Victoria did not look up. What did he care anyway? She was allowed to walk around on here own now. ”Nowhere. Just around.” She replied, not wanting to discuss what she had actually spent the day doing – worrying and hiding. ”Mhmm.” The was another long moment of silence. Then suddenly the paper came down with a whoosh.

”If you are going to act like this you may take it to your room!” Snape snapped. ”Act like what? I didn't say anything!” Victoria replied. For a moment Snape looked like he was about to say something but then decided against it and simple rose from the table, replying: ”I expect you dressed and ready for the feast by four pm. I do not want to have to wait for you. The house elves should have placed your new uniform in your room.”

Why could she not just say it? 'I don't want to do this. Don't make me.' She had already protested once. And loudly at that. What was any different about it now? She rose from the table and abandoned the cereal sludge as Snape made for the living room. ”I don't want to.” Well, that came out sounding about as confident as a mouse at a catnip convention. Snape just paused in the doorway with his back turned to her.

”This is not up for discussion,” Snape stated blankly. ”Finish your breakfast.”

”But that's not fair!” Victoria objected. ”I want to stay with my friends!” Snape sighed deeply and turned around to face her. ”I've already gone over this. I am not comfortable with the amount of control the Headmaster would have over you in that house. Slytherin is by far the best option as I can keep watch over you myself and it means fewer people involved. Furthermore the hat agreed to place you there.”

”But I'm not a Slytherin! The Slytherins don't even like me!” Victoria replied in frustration. ”They will accept you,” Snape replied shortly. ”Now stop with the hysterics. I am confident that with you in my own house I may make a decent witch of you yet.”

Victoria was pretty certain Snape was not joking. ”I don't want to be in your house! And I'm not wearing that uniform.” She cried. Snape froze. There was something in his eyes and for a moment, just a moment, Victoria felt a little bad about yelling it like that. It looked a bit like disappointment but not quite. Whatever it was Snape did not dwell upon it. ”You will be dressed by four. I shall be very displeased if you disobey me.” Then he turned around and left to do whatever it was greasy gits did in their offices on such days. Victoria stormed back into her room. She did not fail to see a uniform lying on her desk chair – neatly folded. To her surprise it was not the emerald green she had expected but rather the standard uniform first years were issued with up to their sorting – carrying only the Hogwarts logo and purple instead of a house colour. But that did not make it any better. She threw herself on the bed and hit and kicked the covers. The thought did enter her mind to run away and not attend the ceremony at all. She even managed to entertain a whole little fantasy of flying off the exotic lands and thereby teach them all a lesson. But for one thing the wards had not been lifted yet and she could not physically leave the grounds. For another she was fairly sure that if she did manage to get as far as Hogsmeade Snape would come find her and quite possibly drag her back by the ear. And considering the fact that he had actually smacked her the last time she ran away from him Victoria was not keen on trying her luck. An awful mental picture of Snape telling her off in a similar manner in front of the rest of the students appeared and although Victoria was fairly sure he could not do that even if he did not have an act to keep up she was not quite able to shake it.

The clocked ticked away metaphorically as the clock which could be found in Victoria's room did not make any sound. Victoria had slept a little bit but had gone off her bed for more than a few minutes to use the bathroom. She found she had little interest in her books and most just lay there. Therefore she did not know what time it was when there was a knock on her door. ”Victoria? Are you decent?” Snape called through the door. The girl he was referring to planted her face in her pillow and did not reply. ”Victoria?” There was another knock and the door creaked open. Footsteps and the silence.

”Get up.” Victoria did not move. Instead she pressed her face harder into her pillow. The next thing she knew she felt thin fingers grabbing her upper arm and pulling her off the bed and to her feet while Victoria struggled to remain where she was. She opened her mouth to say a few choice words to Snape but instead she yelped as Snape released her only to grab her again by the ear.

”What time is it?” he hissed icily, his large nose very close to Victoria's face. ”Ugh! Ow! I don't know! Let go of me!” Snape did not let go. Instead he pulled her along out of her room and along to the bathroom. ”I explicitly told you to be ready at four!” Snape growled. He did release her as soon as they were in the bathroom and Victoria's hand immediately went to cover her poor ear.

”You have exactly ten minutes to shower and then I expect you in your room changing! I want you in the galleries before the students arrive and I would have thought you would much prefer that to walking through an entrance hall full of them!” Victoria looked at him, shocked that he would actually get this upset about her being late and furious because... Well, she was anyway! She crossed her arms in a very clear signal that she did not approve being told off.

”You do not want to test my patience. Ten minutes.” Snape marched out, slamming the door behind him. ”Shut up,” Victoria mumbled at the door but although she halfway expected bat-eared Snape to rush back and say something nothing happened. And Victoria did do as she had been instructed though she took great care to shower as defiantly as possible – which involved her having to figure out what on earth that entailed. She made sure to stomp her feet as much as she could when she finally made her from the bathroom to her bedroom, wrapped in a towel. She had actually debated putting on one of the two dresses in her closet over her shirt but decided against it eventually simply putting on a pair of dark jeans and a white shirt before eyeing the robes.



About twenty minutes later Severus returned to Victoria's door. He had spent several minutes pacing in his office, trying to calm down and hoping that Victoria did as instructed. He had lost his temper... again. But that infernal child was not making it easy for him! Merlin, what had he been thinking! How was he supposed to be any kind of parent to her if he could not even make through one altercation without flying into the red? Why did he have to go get... feelings? This would have been so much easier of they could have simply shipped her off to some family as was originally the plan! Why did he have to create such a mess for himself'! Why did he have to care? But he did and now there was nothing he could do about it.

She got to him. Even if he did not care to admit it. And that was the cause of all this. Yes, he was only trying to protect her as best her could and he did not expect her understand it nor did he expect her to be grateful – she certainly had not been before. And he was perfectly aware he could not expect a twelve year old to understand that her safety was more importantly than her being able to share a common room with the rest of the trio. But when she so furiously stated she did not want to be a Slytherin he could not help but partly take it as a dismissal of him. It was his house. It had always been a part of him and he could never imagine having been anywhere else. Yes, it had ruined him in many ways by who it connected him to but Severus did not deny who he was or what he had done. Not did he deny the attributes the placed him in that house. Perhaps a part of him wanted to see a Slytherin in her because a part of him wanted to see some of himself in her. Ever since he met her he had thought she was clone of James in looks as well as personality. Now that he knew what he knew he was able to see Lily's fire in her. Yes, it was Lily's daughter all right. But so far, blood and dwellings were all they shared.

This time he simply knocked. There was no answer so he turned the doorknob. ”Go away!” it sounded from the other side. ”Excuse me!?” Severus growled as he opened the door. ”Consider yourself excused!” the girl retorted. She was sitting at the desk, in the robes as instructed. Her pointy hat was lying on the desk and she was running her fingers through her short hair. She glanced up at him when he entered, clearly not having expected him to enter without permission.

”I see you managed to follow directions although I strongly advise you to drop the attitude,” Severus observed. ”We may talk before we leave. You may have tea if you wish.” He was being pretty short with her but he as far as he was concerned he was being patience personified.

”I'm not going,” she mumbled through her hand. Severus could feel a migraine coming. ”I've explained the situation to you and I have nothing more to say about that. If your friends are anything resembling true friends they will care little what house you are in. Believe it or not – it is perfectly possible for a Slytherin and a Gryffindor to be best friends,” Severus sneered. ”And even if you should have any problems – which I doubt, I'm certain you find plenty of friends in your new house.”

”I'm not a Slytherin! And I'm not going to be friends with any of them! Ever!” Victoria hissed in return and spun to glare at him. Severus felt as though she had just punched him. There was that bit if her that Snape could not attribute to either himself nor Lily. The part that reminded him of James. A for a moment, just a moment, his front dropped and emotions flooded his eyes. And the girl must have noticed the change in him somehow because she just looked at him. ”I'm sorry, I didn't mean...” she said, searching for the words. ”That is... I'm sure your house is... fine and all but.”

”Come here,” Severus finally said, his voice steely to compensate for his brief flash of emotion. The girl did not hesitate to jump off the chair. ”I am done arguing over this,” he said. ”I don't expect you to be a model Slytherin – in fact I see no Slytherin traits in you whatsoever. That hat may think otherwise but personally I don't consider your particular brand of greatness to be the Slytherin kind. You will still be who you are nothing can change that. You say you are a lion. You are a blasted lion. But I am not going place you in a situation where you may be easily taken advantage of by people with agendas far beyond your understanding. Now if you are quite done with your tantrum...” Victoria grabbed her hat and followed Severus saying nothing at all. He was quite pleased with that result as he did not have the energy for another shouting match and could not vouch for his actions if one such occurred. Besides he was pretty much out of ideas anyway of how to deal with this one. Lying through his teeth had seemed the easiest way out.
To be continued...
End Notes:
Hello everyone! First off! I'm perfectly aware this is not a very good chapter. It was writtin in portions over a long period due to my illness - which you may already know about if you followed FoH. Really, I just wanted this one out of the way to so I can start a fresh next chapter for you all! Thank you for your patience!


This story archived at http://www.potionsandsnitches.org/fanfiction/viewstory.php?sid=3303