Cripple Me by krosi
Summary: Severus Snape hates Harry Potter. Nothing will ever change that. Nothing. Not even the boy’s sudden intrusion in his life. Or that cheeky smile. Or that all too innocent look. Or the sudden shift in his relationship with the Potter whelp. Not even those green eyes. No, nothing will ever change Severus’s hatred for Harry Potter – no matter how fond of him he was becoming. An eventual Snape adopts Harry story. Beginning in Harry’s first year.
Categories: Teacher Snape > Professor Snape, Misc > All written in Snape's POV, Parental Snape > Guardian Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required)
Snape Flavour: Snape is Angry, Snape Comforts, Snape is Cruel, Snape is Mean, Snape is Stern
Genres: Drama, General, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Adoption
Takes Place: 1st Year
Warnings: Abusive Dursleys, Alcohol Use, Physical Punishment Spanking
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 38 Completed: No Word count: 156580 Read: 156457 Published: 10 Oct 2017 Updated: 04 Mar 2024
Devotion by krosi

Severus was trying to ignore the few streams of sunlight trying to shine down on him through a break in the curtains when a small moan made his eyes snap open. Severus sat up in the chair and leaned forward, feeling Harry’s head as he did so.

The boy moaned as he tossed and turned under the blanket, kicking it off his legs to help cool off. He blinked his eyes open, squinting at the light before turning and looking at Severus, a small smile growing tugging at his lips.

“Morning,” Harry greeted. He paused when he noticed his bandaged hands and memories must have slapped him in the face of what had occurred last night if his look of horror was anything to go by. Harry looked back up at Severus and started firing his questions. “What happened? Where’s Ron and Hermione? What about the stone? Is it okay?”

Severus stood and pushed Harry back down on the bed when the boy moved to sit up.

“Do not move,” Severus said. “I will have Madam Pomfrey come over and check you over. I expect you to obey her and take whatever she may give you.”

“But what about—”

“We will have a very long . . . discussion later,” Severus said, narrowing his eyes at Harry, who sank back in his pillows. Harry looked down at his hands with a frown.

“What happened to my hands?”

“From my understanding, a magical backlash from . . . whatever happened to Professor Quirrell. We will discuss that later.”

Poppy came quickly when Severus told her Harry was awake, and she performed some diagnostics and handed the boy some potions, which Harry took obediently while shooting glances at Severus now and then. When Poppy stepped back, she smiled at Severus, looking back and forth between him and Harry as she spoke.

“He’ll be just fine. I suggest some rest for you, Mr. Potter, for the rest of the day at least. I have a couple more potions you’ll need to take to make sure we keep that concussion at bay and then you’ll be good as new. Your hands will need a cream applied tonight and then they’ll need to be rebandaged. Tomorrow, your hands should be completely healed.”

“Thanks, Madam Pomfrey,” Harry said.

“Do not thank me quite yet. I expect you to take these potions and your hands will have to be a two-person job. Now, I’ve already spoken with Professor Snape and I think we can agree to give you the option of staying here and allowing me to see to your injuries, or if you’d really like, you may leave and spend the night in Professor Snape’s quarters. The choice is yours.”

Harry visibly gulped, and Severus folded his arms as he waited for the boy’s answer. He knew from past experiences that the boy did not like staying in the infirmary, and he hoped that the child picked his quarters. It would be much easier to keep a close eye on the boy and Severus had no plans of letting that child out of his sight anytime soon.

“I think I’ll go with Professor Snape,” Harry answered, lowering his head and playing with a loose thread on the blanket.         

“Very well,” Poppy said, nodding her head. “I’ll collect your potions and extra bandage material . . .” She trailed off as she moved away, digging through her storage for the right potions.  

Severus sat down on the edge of Harry’s bed, catching the boy’s hand and pushing it away from the thread before it could be pulled any more than it already was. Harry rested his hands in his lap and looked up at Severus.

“You will rest for the day,” Severus said. “We will take care of your disobedience tomorrow when you are better.”

Severus was secretly glad that his tone made the tip of Harry’s ears burn red and the boy nodded at him. He was about to explain what exactly he thought about Harry’s little adventure down the trapdoor when none other than Albus walked into the room, twinkling eyes and grinning beards. Severus narrowed his eyes at the man.

“Ah, good morning, Harry,” Albus said, standing at the end of Harry’s bed. “I see you’re awake and well. Severus, good morning to you as well.”

“Indeed,” Severus replied.

               “Perhaps Poppy could use your assistance in gathering supplies for Harry before he leaves?” Albus suggested to Severus, giving the man a pointed look.

               Severus glanced at Harry then back at Albus. He sighed and raised his hands in defeat, taking the hint and giving the two some space to talk. He had a vague idea of what Albus wanted to say to Harry, and there was no need for him to argue to stick around and listen when he could interrogate the information out of Harry later if he felt the need to. He summoned a house elf and asked for a set of clean but light clothes for Harry from the boy’s dresser in his quarters. Then, he joined Poppy in her storage room and leaned against the counter where Poppy was busy mixing up and vialing the potions Harry needed. She smirked at Severus as he folded his arms and crossed his ankles in annoyance.

               “Kicked out of the conversation by Albus?” Poppy asked, eyeing a vial as she filled it with a moderate dose.

               “I’m sure he’s filling Harry’s head with tales of heroism as we speak,” Severus snapped, glaring at the doorway. “I’ll make sure that boy knows better than that when I’m through with him.”

               “I’m sure Harry only wanted to help. Kids get these ideas in their heads that adults are incapable of handling adult matters, you know.”

               “I’m becoming increasingly aware.”

               When Poppy finished mixing the salve, she handed it and several small vials to Severus, who slipped them into inner robe pockets.

               “The red and blue vials need to be taken every night for the next seven days, and the green vial needs to be taken in the morning for the next ten days to ward off any infections or colds from being down in those chambers. The salve needs to be applied thickly on his hands tonight, so there should be plenty there to coat both hands. Here’s some extra bandage material. Tomorrow, those burns should have healed, but if they have not, you need to bring him right back here.”

               The house elf returned with a set of clean clothes for Harry, and Severus accepted them with a nod to the elf.

               “Of course,” Severus said. He set the clothes down on the counter to pocket the pouch of bandage materials. “Dragging him back to the infirmary will be the highlight of my morning. If you have such little faith in your salve, perhaps you should just give me a second dose now and we’ll call it a day.”

               “You know I can’t do that,” Poppy said with a smirk, crossing her arms. “It’s a potent burn salve, and if it doesn’t work, Harry may need a different type of treatment only a specialist can provide.”

               “A specialist, eh? And where might I find one?”

               Poppy rolled her eyes and stepped around Severus, leaving the storage room. Severus followed her, not surprised to see that Albus had already left. Poppy stopped in front of Harry’s bed.

               “Well, young man,” she said, “you’re all set to go. I’ll let your friends know where you are. Shall I tell the rest of the school the Boy-Who-Lives is not accepting any visitors?” Poppy addressed the last question to Severus.

               “Tell them what you will,” he replied. “You could tell the whole school he succumbed to his injuries for all I care.”

               “Dad, no one’s going to believe that.” Harry snorted. “I’m sure Hermione and Ron already shared what happened with at least everyone in Gryffindor.”

               “Then they shall be greatly devastated for a plot twist,” Severus said before he motioned to the boy to get out of the bed. He handed the boy fresh clothes. “Up with you and get dressed. I would like to have you settled in your bed for a long nap.”

               “But I just woke up,” Harry said. “I don’t need a nap. And I’m kind of hungry.”

               “You will eat when we get you in bed.”

               With a loud, dramatic sigh, Harry accepted the clothes and Severus and Poppy stepped out from behind the curtains to give the boy some privacy. When Harry was dressed, Severus thanked Poppy for her care and Harry did the same. With that, Severus led Harry down several mostly unused halls to the dungeons, effectively avoiding any students and other professors. When they arrived in Severus’s quarters, Severus directed the boy to bed while he saw to it that breakfast was made.

               A generous amount of everything served in the Great Hall appeared on a platter, and Severus frowned at the selections. He figured something simple and easy on the stomach would do for now. Harry didn’t need anything heavy before he rested until lunch. He selected a plate of plain white toast with jam and added a small bowl of yogurt with strawberries. Using a hover charm, he let the plate float in the air while he poured the boy a glass of milk—he certainly did not deserve pumpkin juice after all. Severus snatched the plate out of the air and carried it and the juice to Harry’s room.

               Except Harry was not in the room.

               “Harry,” Severus called as he set the plate and cup on the nightstand.

               “Sorry, I needed the loo,” Harry announced as he appeared in the doorway. “That’s a cool desk, by the way. Where did you get it?”

               “I do not believe the loo lives in my potions lab.”

               “I was just looking. I didn’t go in. The door was open, and the desk was right there. Did you make it? I saw an ax on the lab table.”

               “I did. Sit.” Severus pointed at the boy’s bed.

               “Really?” Harry jumped up on his bed and crossed his legs, watching as Severus arranged the blankets around him before handing him the plate of breakfast. Harry absently picked up a piece of toast, but he kept talking. “How did you make a whole desk? Where did you get the wood? Did you use magic, or did you do it the muggle way? Where did you learn to even do that?”

               “Eat your breakfast,” Severus said.

               Harry sighed and took a bite of the food, finally looking down at the plate. His eyebrows furrowed, and Severus was sure the boy was disappointed in the small selection, but Severus was not about to indulge the boy. Severus watched Harry take a couple more bites of his toast before he spoke.

               “I expect you to eat all of your yogurt and fruit as well,” he said before Harry could pick up more toast. The boy glanced up at him then turned his plate and began eating the strawberries out of the yogurt. Severus frowned, but said nothing about it. Instead, he answered the boy’s earlier questions.

               “My father was a carpenter. Whenever my parents fought, I would go to my father’s workplace and his partner taught me about woodworking. It was a good distraction back then.”

               “Oh,” Harry looked down at his plate. “Did you need a distraction from something? Is that why you made a desk?”

               Severus thought his words over carefully.

               “It did help distract me from my withdrawal symptoms. But I do enjoy the physical act of building. I forgot how much so, actually. I made the desk for you.”

               “Really?” Harry’s head snapped up and a smile grew on his face. “Thanks! Do you think you could teach me how to do that?”

               Severus raised a brow. “Perhaps you could help me make your own chair.”

               Harry’s smile grew.

               “After your restriction, of course. I’m thinking at least two weeks of thinking time in your room will help remind you why it is imperative to obey me, wouldn’t you agree?”

               “Not really,” Harry mumbled over a bite of yogurt.

               “Pity. Unfortunately for you, that decision isn’t yours to make. We will have this talk tomorrow after your hands have healed. For now, finish your breakfast and then you will rest.”

               “But I’m really not tired,” Harry said with a small whine. “I can’t just lay here and do nothing all day. I’ll die of boredom.”

               “You will survive. I’ll make sure of it.” Severus raised a hand and summoned a book. He set it on the nightstand. “Here. If you absolutely must, you may read. You can manipulate your finger and thumb enough to turn a page, correct? Good. Don’t overexert yourself, and I do not want to see you out of this bed for anything but the loo. Understand.”

               “Yes, sir.” Harry looked at the title of the book: Treasure Island by Robert L. Stevenson.

               “I think you’ll enjoy that story,” Severus said, seeing Harry’s face morph into a small smile. The boy was probably glad it wasn’t a textbook. “Finish your breakfast and leave your dishes on the nightstand. The house elves will collect them. I will check on you in a bit.”

               Severus left the bedroom, closing the door silently behind him. He made his way over to his lab, where he used his wand to push the wooden desk to the back wall covering it with a light sheet, he summoned from his bedroom closet. He had forgotten to shut the door when he had left last night, but he was glad Harry had found it and showed an interest in woodworking. He would be more than happy to teach Harry how to build some useful appliances for himself. It was a useful skill to know.

               Severus emptied his pockets of the vials of potions and salve and settled everything on a shelf in his lab. Satisfied for now, he moved to a worktable where lines of filled vials waited to be graded. He picked up a quill and his grade book and began marking the names of students who passed or failed their practical final from first to seventh year. Usually he broke it off into groups and graded first through third and fourth through seventh, but he had fallen so far behind grading, he had to do it all at once. He would have to suffer through it as it was his own fault he was in this predicament.

               Nearly two hours passed, and Severus was one-third of the way through his grading when he remembered that he had wanted to check on Harry. He set everything down and rushed over to the boy’s door, hoping the child had listened to his orders of staying in bed.

               He opened the door and froze at the sight.

               Harry was asleep with the open book resting against his glasses, one hand half attempting to hold the book where it was, his other hand hanging off the bed.

Severus smiled and stepped into the room as quietly as he could. With careful fingers, he removed the book off Harry’s face and bookmarked the page with a swiftly summoned quill. He removed Harry’s glasses, folded them, and set them on top of the book. Sliding his fingers under Harry, he slid the boy over more on the bed, pushing the child’s arm under the blanket and tucking him in firmly. And just as quickly as he entered, he left.

Harry had been well behaved all day and night. The two ae dinner together in Harry’s room, Severus having summoned a chair to sit close to the boy. Afterwards, they chatted about things like summer plans and visiting friends while Severus unbandaged Harry’s hands and applied the required salve before rebandaging the hands once more.          

                The next day came too quickly for anyone’s liking.

               Even so, Harry was happy to be out of bed with healed hands and he came tearing into the eating room still in his pajamas.

               “Slow down,” Severus scolded from his seat at the head table. He set the required potions Harry had to take in front of the boy’s seat.

               “Sorry,” Harry said, sitting down at his seat to the right of Severus and drinking the potions as quickly as he could, his face scrunching at the taste. “I’m just starving. You barely let me eat yesterday.”

               “I gave you plenty of food. You were simply being picky with your options.”

               “You didn’t give me good options.”

               The table filled with the variety of food served at the Great Hall and Harry happily began dishing out scrambled eggs, bacon, beans and toast, and a full glass of pumpkin juice. Harry began happily digging in while Severus helped himself to porridge with fruit toppings. Harry noticed his choice and frowned.

               “All of this food and you pick that?” Harry asked.

               “Madam Pomfrey’s orders,” Severus said. “Whether they are good options or not, I will not waste any food.”

               Harry humphed and returned to his own breakfast. Severus took a bite of his own before opening the Daily Prophet. “When you are finished, make your way to the lounge so we may tend to your punishment before I have you shower.”

               It was as if Severus had hexed the boy with his words. The child froze with his forkful of eggs raised midway to his mouth and his cheeks burned. He lowered his fork to his plate with a cling and swallowed.

               “I forgot about that,” he said.

               “In that case I am glad to remind you that the crazy late-night adventure you and your friends embarked on was highly forbidden and against several school rules.”

               “I remember that. I just thought I would only be on restriction, like you said. What’s wrong with that?”

               “If I recall correctly,” Severus said, lowering his paper and setting it aside, giving Harry his full attention, “I never said your only punishment would be restriction. And as I’ve said before, how I choose to discipline you isn’t up for debate. You recklessly put your life in danger over something that I have told you countless times to leave alone. You’ve been warned, Harry, and yet you still went behind my back and pursued a dangerous item that nearly got you and your friends killed without so much as a second thought.”

               “We did try to tell someone. But Dumbledore wasn’t available, McGonagall didn’t believe us, and you were in the infirmary.”

               “You will remember to address all of your professors with respect and use their appropriate titles. And what about any other professor? I know there are several more you could have gone to. Madam Pomfrey even. And even if Professor McGonagall did not believe your words in the moment, our jobs are to alert the headmaster of any suspicious activities in the castle, and she did let the headmaster know of your behavior.”

               “Wait . . . she did?”

               “Who do you think found you in the chamber not long after you fell unconscious?”

               “I thought since she didn’t believe us, she wasn’t going to do anything. I was just trying to help. I saved the stone.”

               “You did not do an inkling of thinking. You assumed you knew best and took off after Professor Quirrell who nearly killed you.”

               “I didn’t know Voldemort would be hiding in the back of his head!”

               “Do not say that name!”

               “Sorry,” Harry said in a much quieter tone, looking down at his abandoned plate.

               Severus sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes and counting backwards from ten. This conversation had gotten out of hand quite quickly. He was supposed to be lecturing the brat not arguing with him.

               “Why don’t you like me saying . . . that name?” Harry asked.

               There was a silence between them for a long moment.

               Severus sighed and answered truthfully, “It is painful, Harry. The name alone brings back painful memories.”

               Severus did not dive any further into the horrors of the First Wizarding World or the guilty twinge of pain that shot up his arm every time he heard that name and was reminded of his careless, idiotic mistake. He opened his eyes and looked at Harry, taking in the boy’s contrite face.

               “I didn’t know,” Harry said. “Sorry.”

               “It is all right. As you said, you didn’t know.”

               The two sat in silence for a few minutes before Harry stubbornly pushed his food away.

               “I’m not hungry anymore,” the boy said.

               Severus sighed, waving his hand over the table, vanishing their breakfast.

               “Would you rather get your punishment over with now?” he asked knowingly.

               “I guess.”

               “You may have a snack in a couple hours, then. I will not have you going hungry. Come.”

               Severus led Harry into the living room, sitting down on the couch and positioning Harry in between his knees. He tilted the boy’s head up with a finger under his chin.

               “You understand why you are being spanked, right?”

               “For risking my life when I went after the stone,” Harry said.

               “I want you to know how much you have come to mean to me,” Severus continued. “If something had happened to you, I would have been devastated. As it was, you had me up with worry that night while you were in the infirmary. You cannot put yourself in life-threatening situations like that again, young man. If you do, your consequences with me will always be the same. Understand?”

               “Yes, sir,” Harry said, quickly brushing away a tear that had escaped his eye.

               With nothing further to say, Severus adjusted the child over his knees and gave the boy his first bare-bottomed spanking, a good twenty that left his bottom a rose color.

               Harry sobbed into Severus’s chest once he was stood up and his clothes were righted. While his bum did hurt fiercely, he was more embarrassed by the whole ordeal than anything else, and his face was just as red as his punished backside. Severus wrapped his arms around Harry tightly, holding the boy close. After a few minutes of sniffing, Harry spoke first.

               “I’m really sorry.”

               “I know. You’re forgiven, my son.”  

               “You-you didn’t have to pull my shorts down.”

               “And you didn’t have to go after that stone. I suppose life is full of tough choices, isn’t it?”

               Harry said nothing as he rested his head against Severus’s chest enjoying the comfort of the strong arms around him. Severus hummed softly as he carded his fingers through the boy’s hair, happy that the boy was healed and safe.

 

               The train arrived at King’s Cross Station at exactly noon, and Severus watched from the shadows as Harry said goodbye to his friends and their families. Severus had told Harry that he would pick the boy up late, after most of the students had already left, but he couldn’t resist missing Harry’s happy goodbyes to a school that had changed their lives for the better.

               After goodbyes were given, Harry sat down on a bench to wait. Severus stayed where he was, also waiting for most of the crowd to vanish. Nearly forty minutes passed, and Severus finally stepped away from the post he was leaning on and emerged from the shadows, pulling the hood of his cloak over his head. He walked up to Harry, who smiled up at him and grabbed his suitcase. Hedwig had remained at Hogwarts to be picked up and flooed directly home once Severus and Harry were settled.

               Severus quietly walked Harry away from the station and out of Muggle eyesight before he removed the hood and slipped the cloak off his shoulders, shrinking it and pocketing it. He smiled down at Harry.

               “How was your trip?”

               “It was great! Hermione and Ron promised to write often, and I can’t wait to hear from them again.”

               “You didn’t cause any trouble on the train, did you?”

               “Dad,” Harry complained, leaning against the man. “I’m not always in trouble.”

               “Could have fooled me.” Severus said, taking Harry’s suitcase and shrinking it. He slipped it in a jacket pocket and wrapped an arm around the boy’s shoulder. “Hold tight, we’re going to apparate.”

               Harry closed his eyes as they apparated from London to their destination. When Harry opened his eyes, he frowned and looked up at Severus.

               “Where are we? I thought we we’re going right home.”

               “We are,” Severus said, walking toward the bus stop to wait for the next bus. They were in a new, unfamiliar city and Severus couldn’t help but smirk as Harry looked around as he followed Severus. “But first, I have a surprise for you.”

               “Really?” Harry smiled, then frowned. “But I thought I was on restriction for another week still.”

               “You most definitely are. But that doesn’t mean I can’t give you a surprise when I feel like it.”

               Harry’s frown deepened, but he sat next to Severus at the bus stop, swinging his legs as they waited. Fifteen minutes later, a bus arrived, and they boarded and rode for another thirty minutes. Harry kept looking out the window expectantly, as if a billboard would hint at his surprise. Finally, they arrived at their destination: Ostbridge.

               Severus kept Harry close as they got off the bus and walked through the small town. Harry smiled at everything, pausing to peer through windows and awing at the public library, forcing Severus to urge the boy forward with a hand on the boy’s back. They walked down the road where quiet houses waited, some couples waving to Severus and Harry as they walked by. Severus nodded to them while Harry eagerly waved back.

               “Where are we going?” Harry asked, still walking when Severus abruptly stopped.

               Severus cleared his throat, catching Harry’s attention and the boy stopped a few feet ahead of him. Severus motioned down a pathway with his head.

               “We’re going here.”

               Harry walked back to Severus, looking down the pathway at the bungalow house.

               “Are we visiting family of yours?”

               “Please,” Severus said with a roll of his eyes, “you’re all I have left. This is our new home.”

               Harry’s mouth dropped and a grin spread across his lips.

               “Really?”

               “Really.”

               “Ah, welcome,” Freddy said, the seller of the house exiting and walking down the pathway. He shook hands with Severus, handing over the keys. “I’ve got her all set for you, she is officially yours.”

               “Thanks, again, Mr. Leitz,” Severus said.

               “It’s just Freddy,” he said. He spotted Harry and offered his hand out. “And you must be Harry. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

               “Nice to meet you, sir,” Harry said, shaking the man’s hand. “This is our house for real?”

               “For real. Why don’t you run in there and check it out!”

               Harry ran down the path and into the house, his “wows” and “brilliants” audible by the men outside. They laughed at Harry’s enthusiasm.

               “He’s a cool kid,” Freddy commented.

               “He is,” Severus agreed. “He’s a very brilliant kid.”

               “So, will I continue seeing you every Tuesday and Friday at AA, or now that your home from work, do you plan on coming down to the chapel more often?”

               “I think for now, it might be easier to continue as I have been while I get myself and Harry settled here. I’m expecting a visit from child services in a couple days—my social worker would like to see the new house and of course check up on Harry.”

               “I remember you mentioning that situation. If you need a reference or anything, let me know.”

               “You’re a good man, Freddy,” Severus said. “Thank you for everything you’ve done.”

               “Of course. And now that you live here, maybe you’ll actually introduce yourself at the next meet.”

               “Perhaps.”

               “Hey, Dad,” Harry interrupted, running out of the house. “Can I have the big room?”

               “Absolutely not,” Severus answered, narrowing his eyes at his son.

               Freddy chuckled, then pat Severus’s shoulder. “I’ll let you two settle in. It was very nice meeting you, Harry. I expect to see you both around town some time, don’t be strangers!”

               “Bye Freddy!” Harry waved to the man as Severus walked up to their new house, nodding in farewell at Freddy as the man honked twice before driving away. Harry excitedly showed Severus his favorite parts of the new house, especially the window seat in the boy’s new bedroom. Their next step together was just beginning.

                   

To be continued...


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