To Understand by Siff16
Summary: Harry is struggling and does not know what to do. Things are getting worse and worse and he is not sure how much more he can take. Will Hogwarts, and a particular potions professor, be his new beginning? Or will it be his end? Warnings: Self injury, suicide themes. Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Categories: Healer Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required)
Snape Flavour: Snape Comforts, Snape is Desperate, Snape is Kind, Snape is Loving, Overly-protective Snape, Snape is Stern
Genres: Angst, Drama, Family, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Hospitalization
Takes Place: 1st Year
Warnings: Abusive Dursleys, Self-harm, Suicide Themes
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 18 Completed: No Word count: 22434 Read: 84376 Published: 15 Apr 2018 Updated: 25 Dec 2018
Chapter 12 by Siff16
It wasnt much later that he realized that he needed her NOW.

He flooed home, after making arrangements with the healer, and found...

Well. He never never never should have left the child alone.

When he saw the child, just laying there, looking half dead- for a second he feared that he had been too late.

That he, the boys last hope, had failed Harry too.

He felt like he was going to scream, his throat was strangling him, everything was going dark. Everything just... sunk in to him at once. He was having a hard time chasing it away.

But he knew he had to do it. He could react and beat himself up and do all of that later- he had to hold it off right now.

He had to help Harry.

He immediately went to Harry. The boys eyes were closed and there was so much blood. His knuckles were raw and swollen, he had obviously done quite a bit of damage.

It made Severus want to be sick. He had to take a moment, just a moment, to hold back a retch.

It wasnt just the boys hands that were damaged. It seemed as if anything that was battered before had moved even closer towards broken.

But the boy wasnt broken yet. Severus, if it took every bit of strength he had, was not going to let that happen.

This boy was going to have a life. And, if Severus could do anything about it, his life would NOT be just endless refrains of THIS.

But right now, he had to get through THIS. He had to focus on what was right in front of him.

He grabbed the boy lightly. He didnt want to exacerbate any injuries that were already there.

The boy groaned. It was one of the most beautiful and welcome sounds that Severus had ever heard.

He had already realized the boy was alive. So many years of spying had made determining that quickly very vital.

But it was still nice to hear confirmation.

The boy was breathing rather erratically. Severus knew that while it seemed as if the child would be ok, that he had merely knocked himself out (and in the process had done quite a bit of additional damage), Severus also knew that head injuries were not something to take lightly.

He needed to floo Poppy.

No.

He needed more than that.

And for the second time that day, only this time- with the boy who had been the reason behind the first visit- he flooed, child in arms, to Saint Mungos.

Hopefully they would get to the bottom of this.

Or, at least, they could finally start heading in the right direction.

—-

The second they arrived at the hospital they were greeted by healers.

Severus cursed himself for being so stupid.

The first time he visited he was by himself, and even though the matter has been about the boy, he hadnt actually dragged 'the bloody boy who lived' through a crowded hospital hallway with no protection from all of the eyes currently cutting across the pair.

So stupid.

He needed to do something. But he just wasnt sure WHAT.

Then he realized... they hadnt seen the childs face. Just the slumped over form of a hurt black haired boy.

He could fix this.

Those years of spying were really coming in handy lately. Part of being a spy was being able to perform acts no one would believe... without even giving them a chance to test that hypothesis. Inconspicuous magic.

A simple charm really. He wasnt sure how long it would hold. Hopefully long enough for physical matters to be taken care of- stabilize the child- and then... they could go upstairs and figure things out once and for all.

The good thing was... for all the effort the boy had put into hurting himself... It would be likely that he would be put to physical rights fairly quickly. The magical world was very advanced when it came to medicine involving the body.

Severus just hoped this was also the case with medicine involving the mind.

They had laid the child down on a bed. The one doctor was questioning him as to what happened while another was scanning the boys head.

"A bit of a concussion. Actually, from what you have described... a lot less major than might be expected. The child is obviously a fighter."

He said all of this while looking at the massive display of scars and injuries on the boy. He frowned more and more as he looked closer and closer.

"Sir. I am going to need to talk to you in private about... your boy."

He said this will a severe tone. One that had obvious notes of disgust.

Once the pair were out of earshot the questions began.

"Did you know that the child has many injuries in different stages of healing?"

"Do you know how this happened?"

"You are just his professor you say?"

"You do know we will have to report this to the authorities"

Severus was getting more and more nervous.

He was... pretty sure at this point... he had made the wrong decision in coming here.

He was thinking of different ways to escape this situation when the best chance of that happening possible came storming in.

Dumbledore.

He immediately strode towards the doctors, and within seconds had them hustling towards the door.

As they walked out, Dumbledore looked at Severus and whispered one word.

"Go"

Severus didnt need to be told twice. The child was awakening. Groggy. But by this point was more conscious than not.

He grabbed a magical wheelchair, spoke to it, and off it went with the child upstairs to the floor with the doctors he REALLY needed.

And Severus, like he would always try to be, stayed right there by him.

Until they reached the door, walked through, took a deep breath, and realized- this, whatever this was, was IT.

Severus just hoped that, for the boys sake, IT was enough.
To be continued...


This story archived at http://www.potionsandsnitches.org/fanfiction/viewstory.php?sid=3475