Bluebirds and Birthday Candles by TheTransfiguredCanary
Summary: It only took a moment for the world as Harry knew it to crumble. For everything he thought he knew to be cast into doubt. High on the Cliffs of Dover, he'll learn not just about himself, but his bitter old potions professor, and his beautiful rescuer, each scarred by love and loss. Secrets are waiting in the winds. It will take all the hope in the world to bring them to the light.
Categories: Parental Snape > Biological Father Snape, Teacher Snape > Professor Snape Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Emmeline Vance
Snape Flavour: Snape Comforts, Snape is Kind, Snape is Stern
Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Family, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Abuse Recovery, Depression Recovery, Disguised!Harry, Hospitalization
Takes Place: 3rd summer, 3rd Year
Warnings: Abusive Dursleys, Alcohol Use, Emotional Abuse, Neglect, Panic attack, Profanity, Romance/Het
Challenges: None
Series: Wishing on the Winds
Chapters: 28 Completed: Yes Word count: 106216 Read: 38680 Published: 03 Aug 2022 Updated: 07 Feb 2023
Chapter 21 - Snowflakes and Cinnamon by TheTransfiguredCanary
Author's Notes:
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

MERRY CHRISMAHANNAHKWANZIKAH!!!

(Chris-ma-hon-na-kwan-zi-kah)

I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday season, whether you celebrate a holiday or not!

It's pretty damn cold where I am right now, and it's very late,

But I wanted to be fanfiction Santa and bring you a gift right at the stroke of midnight!

Co Happy holidays from me to you!

Please enjoy my gift!

-TTC

Harry grinned as he put the finishing touches on his Christmas wrapping. The boxes were small, but he was still proud of what was inside of them. It had taken a long time to get them to actually work and without any side effects. Professor Babbling said it was an impressive network, and that it was rather clever to include the seasonal runes as stabilizers. Harry grinned before he picked up the two packages and brought them down to the tree, where he nestled them into the ever-growing pile of gifts. He felt his chest bubble as he saw the few with his name scrawled on the tags in Severus' loopy handwriting. He hadn't really expected that. Gifts from his professors. But it made him feel like-

"Oh, that man!" Emmeline shrieked furiously before something slammed on the counter. Harry blinked and watched over towards the kitchen with a worried frown.

"Are you and Professor Snape fighting again?" he asked. Emmeline jumped a mile.

"Harry! Oh no darling Severus and I are fine… I was complaining about someone else." Emmeline assured him, even as she eyed the back kitchen door with a slightly craned neck.

"Are you waiting for a parcel?" Harry asked. Emmeline whipped back around with slight horror.

"You didn't take anything did you?!"

"I'm guessing it's for me then?" Harry questioned with a grin. Emmeline pursed her lips.

"It's meant to be a surprise!"

"Well I haven't seen any owls today," Harry assured her. "And I'll try not to be nosy."

"That would be impossible." Severus drawled from behind him as he emerged from the panty. He too had a parcel for the tree.

"I can mind my own business!" Harry argued. Both Severus and Emmeline gave him a deadpanned look. "I can!" Neither adult deigned to comment on his insistence. But Emmeline did roll her eyes.

"Come help me with the cookies. I'm making ginger snaps."

"Erm… professor Snape and I are allergic to those." Harry reminded her casually. Emmeline blinked and then smacked herself on the forehead.

"Cinnamon snaps then!" she amended as she put the powdered ginger away and reached for the whole cloves instead. "Can you grind those in the mortar for me dear?"

"Sure!" Harry cried happily before he dove into helping.

"I think we should go to the Christmas market tonight," Severus remarked. "What do you think? Ham, beef, or goose?"

"I've never had goose before," Harry remarked casually, "what's it like?"

"It's a juicier meat, but a bit more gamy than turkey."

"Goose is to turkey what venison is to beef." Emmeline reasoned as she began adding the cinnamon and baking soda to her creamed butter and sugar.

"Erm…" Harry began with a wince. "Never had venison either." Emmeline blinked.

"Forgive Emmeline, her privilege is showing." Severus drawled with a chuckle. Emmeline responded to that by throwing a bit of the unfinished batter at him. Harry bit his lip at the man stared at the bit of butter and spices stuck to his shirt. Then he took a deep breath and unbuttoned his cuffs, and rolled his sleeves down. Emmeline stared at him when suddenly the man sprung across the kitchen and grabbed a handful of flour.

"Wait wait wait!" Emmeline cried in fear. And Severus threw it into her face. She yelped and then coughed out a laugh as she choked on a mouthful. Severus chuckled and dusted his hands off in the sink while the woman shook with laughter. Harry laughed as well as Emmeline wiped her face off.

"Well!" She cried, though her smile was still beaming, "someone's not getting any cookies!"

"I am a master of stealth and deception." Severus declared darkly, looking frighteningly serious. "If you think you can keep cookies from me in my own home, you have another thing coming." Emmeline rolled her eyes before going back to actually making the cookies.


Emmeline stared at the goose currently soaking in the kitchen sink with a scowl.

"Last time I ever ask Charles for anything." She spat angrily as she slapped the kitchen towel over the counter.

"It still hasn't arrived?" Severus demanded with a frown.

"He said he'd have it delivered two days before Christmas!" Emmeline cried angrily before she fished into her pocket and pulled out the official receipt. "See! It lists the delivery date!"

"This says Hogwarts," Severus remarked. Emmeline blinked and turned it over again, scanning the page rapidly before she turned her head up and groaned.

"It'll be back by now… I'll have to go pick it up myself." She whined desperately. Severus shook his head.

"There is no way I will allow you to subject yourself to that man two days before Christmas."

"But-"

"You have other gifts for him. It's not the end of the world. You can give it to him when we get back to Hogwarts. He wouldn't be able to ride it around as high or fast as he'd want anyway." Severus remarked. Emmeline sighed.

"But I wanted this Christmas to be special, and it's something he'll really appreciate."

"He'll probably appreciate anything," Severus muttered bitterly. Emmeline sighed, despite knowing that he was right.

"I feel awful though…" Severus shook his head.

"I'm sure Harry wouldn't mind and will understand." Emmeline huffed but nodded regardless.


Harry woke on Christmas morning with the dawn. He rushed to his window and watched the sun creep up over the horizon, casting the snow into brilliant sparkles. Then he rushed down the hall. He paused at the door. Was this a good idea? Ah, what the heck. He banged on the door with a big grin. In a second the door burst open with Snape brandishing his wand, looking bleary-eyed but battle ready. Harry jumped back in shock with a yelp. The man blinked.

"Harry?"

"Happy Christmas!" The teen cried, "Now come downstairs!" Then he grabbed the man's housecoat by the sleeve and tugged him down the hall. He released him about halfway down the stairs as he rushed towards the couch where Emmeline was already groggily sitting up, looking equally bleary.

"Where are the Death Eaters?" She asked groggily.

"No Death Eaters!" Harry admonished. "Just presents!"

"Shouldn't we have breakfast first?" Emmeline whined tiredly. Harry looked crushed.

"But presents!" he begged.

"At least let me make coffee first," Severus complained as he marched past them groggily. Harry pouted even as Emmeline yawned widely.

"We always have breakfast first," she murmured tiredly. Harry looked back at her heartbroken. Then Severus came back with two steaming mugs, though they both looked a lot lighter than their usual brew. The second Emmeline took a sip, she moaned in delight.

"Oh, how I love the Irish," she murmured. Severus agreed with a grunt. Then Harry dashed over and thrust his presents into both their hands. They both glanced down at their matching boxes and gave him a curious look. He was practically vibrating as he grinned at them. So they both pulled the ribbon loose and opened the boxes.

"Oh!" Emmeline cried with a wide smile. "Oh, Harry! Thank you!" Severus lifted up the medallion with a curious expression.

"This division… It's very unique. I recognize the central rune as a mark of a yule stone, but the others,"

"It's a guardian stone." Emmeline supplied with a smile. "The runes - well I suppose Harry should explain them."

"These runes here are defensive and should ward you against simple jinxes. This one detects poison and will heat up slightly, which I know you don't really need, but maybe if you have a cold," Harry offered Severus with a bat of his hand. "The Yule rune in the centre would usually mean that after the solstice the runes would lose their effect, but I wanted them to be useful all year long, not just close to the solstice. So I figured out a way for the winter solstice to sort of… recharge it every year. So it is a Yule stone, but it's a year-round one." Harry offered with a grin. The pair were staring at him, looking highly impressed.

"That is remarkable," Severus remarked before he lifted the medallion and settled it over his neck, then tucked it into his shirt. Emmeline put it on as well but left it over her shirt.

"I know it works better against the skin," Emmeline assured Harry as he opened his mouth, "but I'd like to show it off, it's really quite wonderful. Thank you so much darling" Harry blushed and smiled at his knees.


Around eleven, after Harry had finished opening his many many presents, and Emmeline had just started their breakfast of chocolate pancakes there was a knock at the door. Severus made a grumbled noise and walked up to the door.

"Albus I swear-" but the man on the other side of the door was not Albus. He was a tall, slightly portly fellow with wispy, wild white hair coming out of the side of his head while the top was completely bald. He was leaning on a cane in one hand, and propping a very impressive-looking broom on his shoulder with the other.

"Jolly Holiday!" the man cried with a beaming smile. "Is my little Emmi in?"

"Grandfather?" Emmeline cried in awe as she stepped into the doorway. Her jaw dropped before she grinned. "Grandfather!"

"Emmi!" he cried before he stepped into the cottage. "How are you my darling dearest treasure?"

"Wonderful!" Emmeline assured him. "What are you doing here?"

"Why I came to deliver this!" the man cried as he held out the broom. Harry's eyes bugged out of his eyes.

"That's a Firebolt!" he cried in awe. Emmeline beamed.

"Yes!" she agreed. "Yes it is." then she held it out for him. Harry blinked and then slowly stood up. He took the broom in shaky hands. As he stared at it he looked up at her with shiny eyes.

"F-for me?" he stuttered in shock. Emmeline nodded. Harry looked like he was about to faint.

"Thank you!" he finally cried.

"You're very welcome young man!" the older gentleman cried with a grin. Harry blinked at him.

"Thank you Mr. Cleansweep!"

"Please!" the man cried, with a raised hand, "Mr. Cleansweep was my father. Arnold is fine!"

"Would you like to join us for breakfast?" Severus offered politely. Arnold raised an eyebrow.

"Presents before breakfast? Bit backwards isn't it?"

"Harry insisted," Emmeline remarked with a chuckle. Arnold chuckled.

"Ah, the exuberance of youth. I smell pancakes?"

"Yep!" Emmeline accented. The man smiled.

"Well I wouldn't miss your pancakes for anything!" he cried, "then I better stay to make sure this fine young man is satisfied with his Christmas present." Harry sputtered.

"Oh I totally am!" he assured the man. "A Firebolt! A Firebolt! Ron is gonna go mental!"


Harry laughed as he rushed down the street ahead of the pair walking. Severus chuckled indulgently as the boy worked off the mountain of sweets he'd received from them and his friends. He was certain the boy would sleep well tonight, once he crashed through the roof of his sugar high. He couldn't help but reflect on that great irony that he usually found exuberant children, particularly Draco, highly annoying, but with Harry all he could think was how funny it all was.

"He's going to sleep well tonight." Emmeline read his mind beside him. She had dressed up for their evening out and her braid was cascading over her shoulder and decorated with little snowflake pins, framing her face with sparkles. Severus couldn't help but stare.

She was truly breathtaking.

"I agree. I almost think we should walk the whole way ho-" he cut himself off.

There was that word again.

Home.

But he'd already tried that with Emmeline.

And look how well that had turned out.

If Emmeline did notice the full connotations of his slip, she didn't comment. Just serenely kept walking beside him down the snowy street. It was cold, which was why Emmeline had wrapped one of her scarves around Severus' neck, all the while scolding the man for not having proper winter gear. Harry was occasionally slipping on a patch of ice, which caused the boy to give out giddy giggles. Then he finally fell. There was a loud thump, which cause both adults to suck in a breath and rush down the street to help the boy off the ground. He was wincing, holding his shoulder with discomfort, but still smiling.

"That was a bit stupid wasn't it?" he muttered.

"A bit foolish, yes." Severus admonished. "Let's get back to the cottage. I want to look at that shoulder. Then we'll have some hot cocoa and finish our chess match, then I think bed." Harry nodded. And the trio of them disappeared in a turn of his heel. Luckily the shoulder wasn't badly injured, just a bit bruised. Once he was changed in his new pj, a fleece sort with little stars on them that twinkled and would occasionally shoot across the back, we curled up on the sofa and sipped at his cocoa. Severus had pulled out his wireless, a real treat, since most of the music that played these days was not to his taste. But he seemed to be tuning the music out as he finished settling into the game.

"What was your favourite Christmas?" Harry asked casually before Severus moved his piece. The man paused and looked up at him. Another game of chess and questions? Very well.

"Fifth year. My mother gave me a rare Hawaiian obsidian potions knife. Very exciting. I still have it actually. It does interesting things to potion's potency when I use it in the preparation process." Harry hummed, intrigued. "You'll learn about the importance of equipment materials in seventh year." Then he moved his queen's rook. "Which class has been your favourite this year?" Harry hummed in thought as he looked at the chessboard.

"That's a hard one." he finally admitted. "I've had a lot of fun in Ancient Runes. But Care of Magical Creatures has been really cool too. And I've learned a ton in Defence. Professor Lupin is an amazing teacher." Severus let out a grunt which Emmeline gave him a stern look for. Severus rolled his eyes but watched Harry move his bishop. Instantly Severus' eyes lit up.

The Weasley gambit.

"If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?" Severus blinked.

It was a more hypothetical question than he was used to.

Could the boy be trying to get him off his game?

His eyes flicked down to his left sleeve. That was certainly one option.

He looked up to Emmeline who looked back at him with curiosity. Perhaps that's why Harry had asked it.

He looked at the chessboard.

"I would be less of a coward." Severus finally responded.

Then the king's side castled. Harry blinked and looked at the board again in slight shock.

"Wha- but… I." then he slumped back onto the sofa in shock. Severus chuckled as the boy fully processed.

"Telling Ron 'bout that one," he muttered in irritation before he stared at the board again, deep in thought. Then he looked up expectantly at the professor.

"I'd ask you the same question." Harry bit his lip.

"I… I guess I'd try to be more assertive." he finally muttered. Severus blinked and quirked an eyebrow. Harry smirked, "I guess you would say I'm too diffident." that raised a scoff from Emmeline.

"I still take offence to that," she muttered into her hot cocoa. Harry looked at the board again before he moved his knight at the cost of his bishop. Severus didn't think he imagined the wince as Harry lifted his hand from the piece. Then he remembered that that bishop had been Harry's position. He frowned at the internalized self-sacrifice that Harry had exhibited over his love of the knight. Then he remembered that that knight had been Ronald Weasley, and while still self-sacrificing, it made a bit more sense.

"What was your favourite subject after potions?" Harry asked. Back to casual questions then?

"Arithmancy." Severus replied easily "it was by far the most interesting. It was more interesting than potions in certain semesters."

"Didn't think that was possible," Harry muttered. Then his face crumpled as Severus moved his bishop. He crumpled and let out a moan of defeat, then flicked over his king. Emmeline blinked."He won, he beat me! Ugh!"

"I'm afraid it will take at least another thirty years to reach my level, Harry." the man remarked with a chuckle. "I learned to play when I was seven and practised against some of the best chess minds in the world until I was eleven. Then I continued to practise all throughout my life."

"You were in chess tournaments as a kid?" Harry asked in awe. Severus smiled.

"Yes. At a park with all of the elderly men in the local old folks." he declared. Harry blinked.

"The greatest chess minds in the world? At a seniors home in rural Yorkshire?" he drawled. Severus took a sip of his cocoa.

"You can go to all the chess tournaments and watch all of the most official and pretentious of matches, where each move is analyzed and counted and counter-counted against every move before and after," Severus began with a sniff. "But you don't meet a chess master until you find the one that thinks to cheat."

"Well, they would be much of a master if they had to cheat!" Harry argued, more out of frustration than anger. Severus marvelled at how far they truly had come that he could now tell the difference and not be angry himself.

"Not actually cheat." Severus specified. "Think to cheat. It is a man that would think that will make spontaneous sacrifices or aggressive acts. He will do the unexpected because he thinks the costs are worth it for reasons that go beyond official numerical values and prestige. And with each act, he develops a keen sense of understanding of the real aspect of the game. You must think of the history of the game, which was to simulate the commanding of an army. A commander may make mistakes, he may change his mind on a whim of fate or a flight of fancy, he may rage forward in a storm of passion, or retreat in a bout of cowardice. One must learn to play the game as a general," Severus said, moving one of his pawns to an arbitrary spot on the board, "before they attempt to play as a queen." He placed his queen beside the pawn for emphasis. Harry smiled. He looked at the board again and smirked.

"I don't think you should call yourself a coward." he put the queen back. "I could have taken the queen with my first bishop! That would have still put you in check!" Severus lifted his eyebrow then his rook and moved it up one square. "Oh."

"Come now Harry, you forfeit because you knew the match was over six moves before it actually finished," Harry grumbled something under his breath as he filled the little velvet-lined drawers that held the pieces. By the time he was done he was yawning and rubbing his eyes.

"Go to bed darling," Emmeline said with a smile. "Tomorrow I want to see more of what your new broom can do, even in a confined space." Harry grinned widely.

"Absolutely!" Then he yawned again.

"To bed." Severus crowed as he put the chess set back where it belonged.

"Night!" Harry cried as he marched up the stairs. And suddenly Severus was alone with Emmeline, as crooning, holiday love songs poured out of the wireless. She looked effortlessly perfect, curled up on his couch.

But he couldn't help but think of that day, nearly twenty years ago now.

How much he'd ruined everything.

Suddenly Emmeline let out a sigh.

"What are we doing, Severus?" she asked before she looked at him in that knowing way she did when Severus was certain she must be a legilimens, for how her thoughts so often mirrored his own "we know how this story ends. We've been down this road before."

"Emmeline…" Severus began. But the words refused to leave his throat as if that first syllable was barring the way. And then he lost his nerve. "Can I take your mug?" Emmeline sighed again and handed him the mug. He retreated to the kitchen and spent a bit of time scrubbing them by hand, rather than using magic. When he finally finished berating himself and returned to the living room Emmeline was asleep, curled up on the sofa. It was a familiar scene, which made Severus' heart hurt. Then he made it worse by laying the throw blanket over her.

What were they doing?

Being the fools they had always been.

 

Severus sighed and left the living room, ending Christmas day the same way he always did, awash with regret and bad memories.

The End.


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