Chapter 35

The House

xxx

Severus ran a smoothing hand over the duvet atop the bed that would soon belong to his son. Everything appeared in order; Dumbledore and he had been inspecting the house since the wee hours of the morning, and Severus had been coming all week. Two boggarts had been expelled from a closet and a wardrobe, the particularly malicious portraits stored, the others hung out of sight, and the house elf briefed on what would be expected when he and Harry took up residency there. It had been… tiring, and he didn't particularly enjoy the reminiscent feelings that seemed to pursue him. He let out a deep sigh and sat down, closing his eyes as a defence against the nostalgia that threatened to envelope him again.

It was almost haunting, revisiting this home. He'd left soon after his parting with Lily, and hadn't returned except to collect his things when needed. She had done most of the decorating on this house, and travelling from room to room, closely inspecting everything she had, at one time, been responsible for was difficult. However, he had attempted to be strong. He'd changed nothing aside from the location of the Master bedroom, asking Dumbledore to move it to the other side of the house. He hadn't slept alone in that room since she'd left; he preferred not to try now.

The thoughts wouldn't stop flooding him. Were he a more rational man, he might not be in this situation. Had he not scared her off, would he still be sitting alone in this room, thinking longingly of her? Severus rested his head against the bedpost, more embittered and worn than angered by these thoughts. He was too tired to care anymore; he could only regret his actions. He couldn't change them.

"There's nothing to be done."

Severus' eyes snapped open and flew to the door, scrutinizing the careworn face of the Headmaster. Had he somehow known what Severus was thinking?

"That room can't be saved, it's been neglected for too long," Dumbledore continued, looking regretfully down the hall. "I doubt either one of you would enjoy it much, at any cost, unless you planned to take him that deep into the study of white magic. I have a room with similar properties which may be used, when the time comes."

Oh. Severus longed to let out a sigh of relief. Dumbledore had been talking about the room down the hall. "Lily loved it; I thought Harry might have liked to see it," Severus commented, rising from the bed and re-smoothing the place where he'd sat.

Dumbledore nodded thoughtfully, and was quiet for a long while. Severus said nothing more; experience had taught him that the pensive expression currently in place on the Headmaster's face normally meant that he was attempting to sum up his thoughts in a delicate manner. Both men stood; Dumbledore resting a hand on the pine wardrobe, and Severus waiting patiently for his words.

"Severus," Dumbledore finally said resignedly, inhaling deeply and looking grim. His age was beginning to show these days in his actions, words, and most of all, his physical mannerisms. "You cannot bring the boy's mother back to him."

That hadn't been what Severus had expected. He'd expected some sort of wise advice on how to make Harry's holidays more enjoyable, or even on how to deal with his own grief. He knew that Dumbledore could see it still plagued him. "I'm not trying to bring her back to him-" Severus disagreed in what he thought was a rational tone, but Dumbledore raised his weathered hand, signalling Severus to quiet.

"You are attempting to make reparations for the fact that she is no longer here," Dumbledore explained heavily, gazing at the younger wizard with a disenchanted gleam in his eye. Sorrow, sympathy- Severus knew that expression well in the man. "He doesn't blame you. Stop blaming yourself. It is no crime to share your memories of her with him, but I have seen in your eyes the regret you feel at bringing him to this home where she no longer dwells. Harry has come to terms with the fact that she has moved on; it's time you do as well, or you will reopen old wounds which have already healed for the boy. To keep this house as a shrine to your former wife only serves to prolong the feeling of loss, for you cannot bring her back. Bring him here, treat it as your home- yours and Harry's, not yours and Lily's. Lily left here long ago."

That familiar feeling of distress was rising, unnerving Severus from deep within. How dare the man suggest something so… accurate? Even Severus had not realized his motives in keeping everything the same, yet the Headmaster had taken it upon himself to deconstruct and correctly identify his intentions.

"I only wanted to preserve that room," Severus argued, narrowing his eyes. "I'm not trying to bring her back; do not think me so foolish."

"Severus, every change I have suggested today you have refused on the grounds that Lily had wanted it that way."

"It feels disrespectful to change everything she did simply because she is deceased," said Severus, crossing his arms. "It has nothing to do with grief."

"I would disagree, but I can't force you to see my point. I can only plead with you not to force Harry to grieve as well; the boy deserves to spend time with you, not thinking of his mother."

Dumbledore didn't stay to watch his words sink in, for Severus' defiant glare at the floor was a telltale sign that he would not consider them until Dumbledore had left. The older man turned and exited, looking back only once. Severus didn't move; he only stood there, piecing through what had been said to him.

xxx

Harry tried not to think of Friday as Dooms Day, but as Wednesday came to a close, Thursday dawned, and Friday drew ever closer, he couldn't help but feel any other way. He didn't know what he was getting himself into. He'd be spending an entire two weeks with Severus Snape. Irritable, territorial, anal-retentive, hot-tempered Severus Snape. The man might as well stamp one of the potions labels onto his forehead: Warning: Highly volatile and corrosive substance. Keep away from flame and wear protective gloves when handling.

On a good day, for a short amount of time, Severus was tolerant enough to make Harry's time spent with him enjoyable. However, Severus' degree of hospitality usually depended on several variables. One, Harry had to comply with his requests and orders with barely any argument. Two, Harry had to keep his hands off anything belonging to Severus unless given permission to do otherwise. Three, Severus had to be in a pleasant mood to start with.

These conditions had been relatively easy to abide by during the few hour intervals the two spent in each other's company. Harry was careful to keep Severus' temper at an all time low, no matter what sacrifices he had to make. However, Harry wasn't sure he would be able to do so during the entirety of his stay at Severus' home.

Harry engrossed himself in pushing his eggs around his breakfast plate; he hadn't much of an appetite. What if Severus decided he was far too annoying, and sent him to the Weasleys' home for the rest of the Holiday? Oh, that would just be… mortifying, especially since Ron had no doubt informed them all of his relationship to Severus.

Rolling his eyes to himself out of annoyance at his own anxiety, Harry watched Ginny and Ron bicker for a few minutes.

"Ron," he broke in, as soon as one of them stopped to take a breath. "Do you know where Hermione is?"

"No, sorry," Ron said distractedly. "But you'll see her in Potions, won't you? Can't you talk to her then?"

Harry nodded silently.

"I think she said something about finishing her Arithmancy homework," Ginny offered helpfully. For a moment, Harry looked at her thoughtfully, wondering if perhaps she could help him… but as she went back to her argument with Ron, he could see that she was far too wrapped up in fervent debate to give him any advice.

He looked across the table to Hermione's empty spot, and gave his sausage a stab.

xxx

It was risky, talking in N.E.W.T. Potions. It was especially risky when the subject Harry most wanted to discuss was Severus. It was riskier still to do so after Severus was already having a minor conniption over a cauldron melting, affected by the same student who'd already done so twice… that week.

Harry didn't know if it was worth it to take his chances.

"Since you seem unable to complete any of these potions without initiating liquescence, explosion, or any other form of utter devastation," Severus hissed angrily to the class, flattening his palms on his desk and leering at them menacingly. "We will abandon all attempts of producing this potion, and you will each write five-hundred words on what not to do when endeavouring to complete the incombustible potion. How you idiots can manage to melt cauldrons while making potions that are supposed to be inflammable is beyond even me!"

Hermione raised her hand, and Severus' head snapped so quickly in her direction that the sickening cracking sound of his neck could be heard across the room. "Put that hand down, you stupid girl! What question could you possibly have at this very moment?"

Harry's jaw almost dropped. Hermione quickly lowered her hand, looking extremely hurt and enormously embarrassed. Her cheeks flushed, and she said tearfully said, "I just wanted to know when it was due."

"End of class," Severus barked, taking in the rest of the class with his cold, dark eyes. "Well? You have one hour; write!"

Along with the rest of the class, Harry and Hermione quickly took out their parchment and quills. Glancing sideways at her tearful face, Harry resolved to wait a bit before asking Hermione about Severus. They quickly got to their essays; Severus was sitting at the front of the classroom, glaring around at each of his students. His gaze rested on Harry for an extra few seconds. He seemed to be warning him not to incur his wrath.

To mask his own infuriation on Hermione's behalf, Harry quickly fixed his vision on the paper in front of him, ignoring the way Severus' eyes continued to linger on him. He hadn't seen Severus explode like this in a long time; he hadn't exactly been nice, in class, but he had been keeping his temper under control.

So, Harry thought to himself, his temper hasn't changed. This is what I'm in for if I seriously piss him off during these next few weeks… lovely.

The only sounds for a long time were the scratching of quills and the occasional hiccup from Hermione, who was still trying to contain her emotions. Harry felt more than a touch of sympathy for her; she had probably expected better treatment, after the time she'd been spending with Severus and Harry on the potion. To be perfectly honest, Harry had expected the same- maybe not for himself, because their secret was being kept quiet, but for Hermione, at least. She hadn't done anything to deserve to be treated like that.

Harry could feel Severus' eyes burning into his skull. He didn't know why the man was gazing in his direction so frequently. Weren't there more interesting things in the class to watch? Or did he know that Harry was angry? Or was he angry with Harry?

Oh, Harry realized as his quill snapped in half. He'd noticed the furious intensity of Harry's writing- that had been the giveaway.

xxx

This holiday wasn't going to be easy. The boy was obviously, though unsurprisingly, still having problems controlling his temper. Severus was sorely tempted to point this out when Harry's quill snapped, sending the pointed end flying off the table to hit the poor, unsuspecting boy in front of him. If he were allowed to sit and fume, eventually there would be an outburst… from either Harry or Severus. There was a good possibility that it would come from both; it was certain that even if Severus wasn't the one to initiate the quarrel, he would be reacting to, and therefore participating in the explosion.

"Potter," Severus said, glaring at the half of a quill now lying on the floor. "I do believe you've dropped something."

"Thank you, sir, I hadn't realized," Harry said flatly, narrowing his eyes and rising to retrieve it.

"I don't much appreciate your tone," Severus drawled, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. The boy didn't get it. He was actually talking back; how could he not realize that was a warning, and just stay quiet? "Ten points from Gryffindor; and I suggest you watch that temper to avoid losing more."

Harry almost retorted that Severus' temper was no better, but bit his tongue. He knew that Severus would not be taking points if not to keep up appearances; nevertheless, he was irritated. Couldn't he have looked the other way and ignored the breaking of his quill? He slanted his gaze towards Hermione, who gave him a barely noticeable shake of the head. His brows lowered; what was that supposed to mean?

Harry raised his eyes to meet Severus. The man's narrowed eyes held an obscure glint, his expression indeterminable, yet vaguely significant. Harry waited for some betrayal of what he was thinking, but none came. He shook his head and refocused his eyes on his work.

Severus watched Harry for a moment as his head dropped again, and then looked away, peering around at the rest of the class. The boy could be shockingly dull-witted, at times. Even Miss Granger, despite her overly sensitive state, had noticed his subtle hinting that Harry needed to rein his anger. It shouldn't have been difficult to figure out that he was no longer playacting; he had said plainly, "watch that temper," and the boy still looked confused about what Severus wanted him to do.

Severus kept his stern gaze wandering around the room for awhile, watching for any student who dared to stop his or her work. He was still deciding whether or not to collect the essays at the end of class; part of him thought that perhaps it would be a worse punishment to make them slave away on their papers for the next hour, and then simply give them all zeroes for the day. Smirking at that thought, he glanced over at Harry's side of the room, the timing perfect to see the boy try discreetly to pull a blank sheet of parchment out from underneath his essay.

Severus' eyes flickered to the ceiling in annoyance; the boy was going to pass a note. He recognized this manoeuvre well. It seemed to have been a favourite to the few students who had been stupid enough to attempt this atrocity right under the Potions Master's over-sized nose… And it had been a very fair few, for it was a little known fact that he considered it to be one of the utmost signs of disrespect (and Severus Snape did not tolerate disrespect well). The only pupils who had been privileged enough to have him overlook their misbehaviour belonged to Slytherin; all other houses beware.

Now, the question was, would he tolerate the act from his son? He knew he had already committed an unforgivable sin in his son's eyes; he'd snapped at and insulted one of his closest friends. Severus had faith that it would take little more than an apology to be forgiven this. However, to attack the boy almost immediately afterwards showed poor judgment; it would take much more to win Harry's true forgiveness after greatly upsetting him twice in the same class period. Severus had hoped for relatively little conflict this Holiday; perhaps this was a time to pick his battles.

Harry wrote something on the piece of parchment and slid it over to Hermione. Through his peripheral vision, Severus watched her face light up with alarm at the notion of note-passing, and glance ever so obviously from the parchment to Severus, checking to see that he wasn't looking. Seemingly assured that he hadn't seen, she glanced at Harry and back down at the note, moving it over the top of her own essay. She scribbled a note under Harry's scrawl and quickly slid it back to him, glancing at Severus again and going back to work.

Severus crossed his arms and looked resolutely the other way; he wouldn't let anyone know he had noticed this little misdemeanour, but he did intend to have a very stern talk with Harry and his little friend at the end of class. He might be more rational than his son had ever expected, but that didn't mean he was any less the wise.

xxx

Good; so far, he hadn't seen. Harry carefully watched his father's face as he received the parchment back from Hermione, who looked positively sickened by the fact that they were passing notes instead of doing their homework. Still, he needed desperately to talk to her, and time was running out. Tonight they would all be packing, and tomorrow afternoon, everyone would be boarding the train. He couldn't take the risk; he needed someone to confess his fears to now, before it was too late. He looked down at the parchment, and pretended to write as he read what she had written.

Harry, everything is going to be fine!

Some advice.

And if it's not?

He glanced at Severus, and slid it over.

If it's not, then you already have my promise that we will be there to relieve you at your very word. It's not as if he's going to mistreat you. What is the worst that can happen?

This, to Harry, seemed to be a very silly question, seeing as how the worst always did happen to him.

What if he gets so fed up with me that he throws me out?

That's not going to happen.

How do you know?

Because he has shown astounding patience with you already. What makes you think that being beyond the confines of the castle will change that? If anything, he will be less stressed and more willing to open up to you.

Ah. Well, she had a good point, Harry had to give it to her there.

Do you really think so?

This seemed unnecessary, yes, but Harry needed to hear more explanation. He supposed he was going to get one, as he watched Hermione scribble furiously over the note, writing what looked to him like the beginnings of a short novel.

I state emphatically, yes. You and he get along well, from what I've seen- I think this holiday will be brilliant… and if not, then you can rest assured that you're not alone. Let's be honest- what you're really getting at is that you are worried you will somehow mess up and push him away. I promise you, that won't happen. You needn't be so guarded; he's not going to dislike you simply because you say the wrong thing at the wrong time. From what you've told me, you two have developed an understanding of sorts. He's not so irrational that he will disregard that at the drop of a hat.

Harry read what she had written twice, and then finally listened to the little voice in the back of his head that told him he needed to get his essay finished. He mouthed a thank you to Hermione and bent over his paper.

Hermione was right, in a sense. Of course, Harry's fears weren't quite quelled, but he was able to reason past them. Hermione hadn't told him anything he hadn't already known; she'd just brought it to his attention.

If anyone understood insecurities and avoidance, it was Severus. Of that, Harry had no doubt… but could it be concluded that he would be an authority on how to treat someone with the same issues?

xxx

Many of the students had come to find that when given the proper motivation, it was quite easy to write such an essay in one hour. Each turned it in at the end of the class, and hurried away from Severus' desk as quickly as possible; the expression on his face was anything but friendly as he received each student's work.

Somewhere at the end of the line, Harry and Hermione waited patiently to hand in their own essays. Neither could determine why his narrowed eyes flickered angrily over them several times, nor why his glare became especially hard once they'd arrived in front of him.

"Miss Granger, Mr. Potter," Severus said coldly, jerkily tugging their work from their hands and curling his lip as he glanced over them. "You may each take a seat on the opposite sides of the room. I should like a few words with you."

Hermione's wide-eyed expression as she looked helplessly at Harry clearly said, I knew note passing was a bad idea.

Harry shrugged apologetically, and glumly took his seat. He wasn't exactly surprised; he had been ignoring all his conscience's warnings in hope that they were wrong. Usually, such ignorance got him into trouble; apparently, this time was no exception.

Harry and Hermione both waited anxiously as Severus filed the essays away for grading; he appeared to be taking a purposely extended amount of time to do so. He finished what he was doing and turned around slowly, eyeing them for a moment before descending fluidly down the few steps of his platform and leaning on one of the tables.

"Tell me," he said slowly, looking between the two of them and holding his gaze on each for several seconds. "Would you say it is acceptable to use the working time that your authorities give you for anything other than work? Miss Granger? You seem to have an answer to every question, why don't you go first?"

"No, sir," she replied, casting her gaze downward and looking ashamed.

"And you, Mr. Potter?" Severus asked, turning his head towards Harry and lifting his eyebrows in false interest.

"No, sir," Harry replied, but unlike Hermione, held the Potions Master's gaze.

He would attempt to show respect without cowering in fear; Severus was grateful for this, as he would not have appreciated being feared by the boy… that was not his intention. Granted, he enjoyed provoking a bit of anxiety, but he did not need or want his own son to be blatantly scared of him.

"Then I demand to know why you felt my class provided the perfect opportunity to pass notes," Severus said in a terrifyingly calm manner, crossing his arms and waiting expressionlessly for their answers. When he received none, he continued. "Is my class such a waste of your time that you feel the need to entertain yourselves? Perhaps you consider yourselves above the assignments I have given you."

"No, please, sir-" Hermione interjected to no avail.

"Silence!" Severus boomed, turning his fierce gaze on her.

Harry thought to himself that Severus was being a bit irrational; hadn't he just asked a question? Hermione had only been trying to answer.

"There is no explanation for such a blatant mockery of the time I put into teaching you little cretins. Your behaviour today was unacceptable, and your blatant lack of remorse is more pitiful still."

"Listen, Severus-"

"In this classroom, under these circumstances, I am Professor to you, Mr. Potter," Severus said coldly. "You might try respecting that. Both of you have earned zeroes on the day's work." Severus turned his back on them and headed for his desk. "You are dismissed."

Hermione's eyes were wide and round as she looked at Harry pleadingly. Harry's face was stuck in a permanent grimace; Severus hadn't used this tone with him in a very long time, and his words had been awful. He felt as though he'd been struck, and as much as he wished to count this as a violation on Severus' part, he realized that he had been taking advantage of their relationship. He had taken for granted that he would have Severus' favour; what he hadn't taken into account was that he was somehow showing Severus that he had lost respect for him. While Severus had allowed him to spar verbally with him from time to time, and had allowed him many freedoms and informalities, he was still Harry's teacher.

"Professor," Harry said quietly, causing Severus to still and stiffly turn his neck. "It was my fault. If you're going to give a zero to someone, give it to me."

"I watched Miss Granger take the note, Mr. Potter. She is every bit as guilty as you are."

"Sir, I'm sorry- I just… I needed to…"

"What was so important that it could not wait until later, Potter?" Severus snapped, rather irritated that the boy kept trying to make excuses. When would he take responsibility for his actions?

Harry remained silent and looked at the floor. He was boxed in, and could see no way out.

"Perhaps," Severus said slowly, stepping forward, "You would like to trade punishments?"

"What do you mean?" Harry asked cautiously, frowning.

"Hand over the note, and I will grant you credit on your essays," Severus said, smirking and crossing his arms. He knew what he was doing. He would not be accused of forcing his way into Harry's life, or prying, but he did not like to be left in the dark.

Hermione bit her lip and looked to Harry, realizing that they were in a lose-lose situation. Harry returned her worried gaze and fought the urge to bite his own lip; if he showed Severus that note, he would be risking a lot of the trust that they had built up over time. However, he knew Hermione couldn't take the blow to her grade- she had the only outstanding in the class, and loss of credit would ruin that for her. He couldn't be so selfish as to ruin her grade when he had brought her into this mess.

Severus stepped forward and extended his hand, gesturing for Harry to hand over the note. "What will it be, Mr. Potter?"

Harry lowered his gaze defeatedly, an unpleasant churning feeling developing in his stomach. Taking one last look at Hermione's desperate expression, he reached into his bag and pulled out the parchment. He gazed at it for a moment, and then wordlessly handed it to Severus.

Severus' eyes roamed over the parchment for a moment, his features remaining stonily in place. Harry diverted his eyes from the older man, willing himself to look anywhere except at his face. He didn't want to see his reaction. He didn't care about the forewarning he might receive from any of his facial expressions; he couldn't bear it if he saw disappointment and betrayal in his father's normally cool black gaze.

"Miss Granger, please see yourself out," Severus said after several minutes. "I wish to speak privately with Harry."

Harry stole a glance at Hermione, who furrowed her brow worriedly and lifted her bag over her shoulder. As discreetly as possible, she gave Harry an understanding, grateful half smile as she stepped out the door.

Severus watched her leave, and turned back to Harry. The boy refused to hold eye contact with him. He moved down to Harry's desk and rested his tall form against it, staring with intensity at the boy in front of him.

He held up the parchment. Harry winced as he began to read his first statement out loud. "'I'm worried about the upcoming break, Hermione," Severus began quoting evenly, his voice neither harsh nor soft. "'My father and I get along well here, but he has such an awful temper that I'm not sure that will last once we leave the school grounds. Not to mention how finicky he is about his stuff. What do I do?'" Severus finished reading and lowered the parchment, looking at Harry with an almost wounded frown. "Is this really how you feel?"

Harry could not remember ever having felt as truly horrible as he did in this moment, nor could he recall ever having seen Severus look so betrayed. For several minutes, he could not say anything for fear that the clenching feeling that had developed in his chest would cease, and he would express his sorrow in other, less manly ways. He wanted to apologize profusely, but he doubted that would solve anything on either side. His fear would still be there, and Severus would still feel every bit as betrayed as he did now.

"It's not at all that I think you are undependable or… irrational, or anything. It's just… I can't explain it!" Harry looked up at Severus apologetically, frustrated by the refusal of his brain to form his feelings into words. "Maybe… I don't know. Even the nicest people get angry when I'm around… it's like I can't do anything right. Here at school, it's fine… but part of me thinks that's because you've only had to put up with me in small doses. What happens when you have to be around me all the time?"

Severus looked at Harry skeptically for a moment, wondering if he'd heard right. Was this really a time when the age-old line, "it's not you, it's me," was true? Did Harry really think he was the problem? Surely the boy could realize that Severus' temper was to blame for their past quarrels; even Severus had come to terms with this, and he was not a man who often admitted to being wrong.

"Harry," Severus said with difficulty, laying a hand on the boy's shoulder. He did not speak after that; he gazed at a spot over Harry's head, searching for words.

"The Dursleys were nice people until I came along. They always loved Dudley… maybe it's just because I'm unlovable. Maybe I really am… dark, or something, and I just… cause hate in people… Maybe the prophecy meant that I would be greater than Voldemort- maybe that's why he came to kill me. I caused my parents deaths, I caused Sirius's death… maybe those are just steps on the pathway to-"

"Or maybe you're just difficult," Severus interrupted him, tightening his grip on Harry's shoulder. "Congratulations, you've inherited my trademark quality."

"But-"

"First of all, you didn't cause anyone's death. Their deaths were the work of Voldemort and his Death Eaters, no one else. The Dursleys were vile and prejudiced and acted out on their hatred of magic; it wasn't you. I was consumed by a grudge and a pain that I should have let go of years ago… and you never proved my assumptions wrong because I never let you. You are not evil in any shape or form Harry, nor are you unlovable. If you want my honest opinion, you are stubborn, headstrong, and have a guilt complex the size of Great Britain." Severus paused, and softened his tone. "You also have a good heart, good intentions, and a penchant for saving people, even if they don't deserve it. These are not traits to be ashamed of."

"You make it sound like I'm perfect or something. I'm not perfect; I have a lot more faults than I think you realize."

"I will not abandon you," Severus said quietly.

Harry blinked, and said, "What?"

"I will not abandon you. Given your history, I cannot blame you for feeling that I will. Despite your shortcomings, you are my son, and nothing will make me send you away. You need to believe that."

"I-"

"Do you think I would lie to you about a thing like that?"

"No…"

"You need more assurance?"

"No- just- how do you know if you've never tried before?"

Severus quirked one side of his mouth. "Harry, you managed to force my feelings towards you from vehement hatred to… something quite resembling fondness… I do care for you, I hope you know that. I don't say it often, but I do. Do you understand how that change came about?"

Harry shrugged and shook his head a little. "No."

"You opened up. You let me see the real you; don't worry so much about the impression you are making."

"But you haven't seen me at my worst!"

"I could argue that."

Harry growled in frustration and dropped his head back, causing Severus to give a small laugh.

"Let me explain this way," Severus said, folding his arms. "I can tolerate that which I understand. I certainly understand difficult people; I understand bitterness, anger, irrationality, anger… I don't always react in the ideal way… but I do try to consider when I myself have calmed down. I'm sure we will have our disagreements, and it is doubtful that our arguments will be anywhere within the realm of minor… but we will resolve our problems, I have faith in that, and I will not become…" he lifted the note and sighed, quoting, "'Fed up' with you."

Harry nodded, looking down at the floor. He wasn't entirely convinced, but he felt reassured all the same.

"You should be leaving," Severus said after a moment, looking at the door. "Lunch is being served, and you seem to skip far too many meals."

"Yeah, well… so?"

Severus lifted an eyebrow and said, "I'm beginning to think that you enjoy being lectured."

Harry shrugged noncommittally. In reality, Severus was close to the truth. Though the lecturing could be a bit annoying, at times, he still appreciated that someone was genuinely concerned about him. He gathered his things and started towards the door.

Before exiting, Harry paused abruptly, turning and saying, "Sir?"

Looking up from his desk, Severus nodded silently to Harry, signalling him to continue.

"I'm sorry," Harry said, blushing slightly. He meant the apology for both the use of the title, and for the note, but did not say as much. "And… Thank you… Dad."

Severus' expression took on a new look of surprise; Harry cocked his head to the side, seemingly deciding how he liked the title. After a moment, he smiled slightly and nodded to himself. "Yeah- Thanks."

He continued nodding, and slipped out the door.

Severus closed his eyes in relief. He had not needed to prod the title out of him… and he'd not had to endure the tension that was likely to manifest in the room after its first few uses. Overall… he would call this meeting a success.

xxx

On Friday afternoon, Harry headed down to the platform with his friends to see them off. He listened to Ron and Ginny's excited chatter about seeing all their older brothers; they both seemed a bit lonely, Fred and George having left the school. Hermione talked unceasingly about visiting her new baby cousin, revealing a small soft spot for infants. And Harry… Harry just smiled. He was content to listen to their happy talk, their expectancies for the Holidays, their small complaints about the downfalls of seeing the family… whatever. He was just happy that, for once, he had somewhere to go.

There was little time for goodbyes, as they had taken their time getting down to the train, so Harry had to limit his time with each person.

"Harry," Hermione said warmly, the first to wrap her arms around his thin body. "I'll write you over the break, and hopefully I'll see you more than once. Mum and Dad want me to stay at the house for Boxing Day, but I'm going to see if they won't let me go. Remember, just send word if you need our company."

Harry nodded and gave his thanks, then turned to Ron. The two clasped hands briefly, and Ron smiled. Thankfully, he didn't say anything idiotic about Severus; he settled for a quick, "Good luck, mate. I'll be seeing you on Boxing Day."

"Okay, Ron," Harry said, smiling. He turned to Ginny, and was shocked to find himself in her embrace before he'd had a chance to say anything.

"I also hope I'll see you more than once, but in the case that we don't, I'll just say I'm looking forward to seeing you at the Burrow." She paused and pulled back, looking to be carefully choosing her words, and then said, "I'm glad for you, Harry, that you've got the Professor now. I think this will be a good Holiday for you." She smiled. "Happy Christmas!"

Harry nodded and gave her a genuinely grateful smile. "To you too, Ginny."

Once the three had departed, Harry left his spot on the platform and found McGonagall, whom he uncomfortably joined in watching the Gryffindors file onto the train. She gave him a knowing look, seemingly understanding that he was uncomfortable with the idea of walking up to his father in the midst of all the students… some knew of their relationship, but as far as he knew, few accepted it. His Slytherins wouldn't dare say a word, and most of them quite admired the man… but he knew of a few who would turn up their noses, or even throw a hex, at the sight of them standing together.

It was about fifteen minutes before the platform was completely clear of students and the train began to whistle. He stayed by McGonagall's side, watching as it pulled away. As it disappeared into the distance he turned to her to say something, but stopped short when she moved her eyes to something behind him and smiled.

"Are you ready to depart, Harry?" asked a deep voice from behind him. Harry grinned and turned around, nodding.

"Sure," he said, glancing up at the castle. "I'll just need to get my stuff from the Common Room."

Severus nodded and glanced at Minerva, who had an annoyingly delighted smile on her face. She was still as tight lipped and sharply featured as ever, but he hadn't seen her so pleased in… well, it came close to the expression she took on whenever Gryffindor won anything, but he had always viewed that more as smugness than anything.

"Well, I'll let you finish up here," Severus said, gesturing to McGonagall. "Meet me down in my office when you're finished."

Harry shook his head. "I'll walk back up to the castle with you, just one minute."

Looking pleased, Severus nodded and moved to the door, halting just outside it.

Harry exchanged a brief goodbye with Professor McGonagall, who reiterated the fact that he only need write her should he need anything. He thanked her and ran to join his father, who looked as though he were trying to mask his displeasure at having to wait so long.

"Sorry," Harry said a bit breathlessly as he reached Severus. "I tried to be quick."

Severus waved his hand dismissively, and then, apparently distracted by the state of Harry's hair, batted at the unruly strands sticking out on the top. "You are in need of a haircut," he said, half to himself, as he lifted one side of his nose into what Harry might call a thoughtful sneer.

"Oh, that's rich," Harry proclaimed, batting at Snape's own locks and laughing when the older man jumped back.

"Do not touch my hair," Severus said, looking appalled that he would even attempt as much. Harry found this rather amusing, given the topic, but hid his smirk and looked away.

It did not take long for Harry to gather his things from the common room and head down to Severus' office. Severus greeted him with the half smile Harry had come to associate with him, and moved Harry's luggage over to where his sat.

"Professor Dumbledore has offered to transfer our belongings to the house," Severus said, gesturing to the small pile. "I thought perhaps it would be best if we walked from the nearest muggle town."

Harry screwed up his face confusedly. "Why?"

"I'd like you to get a bearing on your surroundings," Severus explained. "Our home is extremely safe; both Dumbledore and I have placed warding on it, and as the Fidelus charm protects it as well, few could wait for you there. Few even know it exists. In the coming years, you may find yourself in need of a safe place to go at a moment's notice. I would like this to be an option to you, but you'll need to get a sense of its location in order to apparate there."

"Oh," Harry said, feeling rather unintelligent.

"Now," Severus said, tactfully ignoring Harry's embarrassment. "There is one floo connection in this town, and to use it, we will have to enter the home of one Nymphadora Tonks."

Harry frowned and tipped his head to the side, but Severus continued before he could ask questions. "I haven't time to explain right now; we can only keep this connection open so long. I will go through, check that all is well, and return. You will then leave and I will follow."

"I really don't think that's necessary," Harry started, shaking his head.

"Well, as I am in charge, it is what I think that matters. And I happen to find it quite necessary indeed. I shall be back momentarily," he said, ducking into the fireplace. "If I have not returned within five minutes, do not follow. Alert the Headmaster or Minerva, whomever you should stumble upon first."

"Wh- I- er- how-"

Before Harry could get any coherent words out, however, Severus had disappeared in a burst of green flame, leaving Harry alone in his office. Harry looked blankly around, unsure what had just occurred. Why were they going to Tonks' house? Why was Severus so worried? Was there something going on that, once again, Harry had been left out of? Frustrated and bewildered, Harry sank to the floor and crossed his legs, propping his head up with both hands.

It wasn't long before Severus reappeared, hurriedly motioning for Harry to go through. Harry didn't have time to argue; he shouted his destination and allowed himself to be whisked away from the castle. It only occurred to him afterwards that the Severus who had stepped through the fireplace could really be anyone… Harry would have never known, since he hadn't even said anything.

With relief, Harry found himself being spit out at the feet of a giddily smiling Tonks. He looked up at her, spit the soot out of his mouth, and grinned toothily. She laughed and helped him up, dusting off his shoulders and embracing him in a friendly hug. She pulled back and pointed at his mouth.

"You've got something in your teeth there, Harry," she informed him, laughing again and handing him a handkerchief.

"Oh," Harry muttered embarrassedly, turning a delicate shade of rose and accepting it. "Thanks."

"Anytime," Tonks said, patting him on the back and turning to greet Severus, who had just made a far more graceful landing than Harry had achieved.

Glad neither of them was looking at him, Harry raised her proffered napkin to his mouth and wiped his teeth, wincing at the sight of the black ashes that came off onto the white cloth.

"We can't stay long, Nymphadora," Severus said, moving from her to Harry. "But we thank you for allowing us to use your fireplace."

Tonks put her hands on her hips and glared at the tall dark man, shaking her bubblegum pink head. "First of all, if you are going to insist on calling my Nymphadora, then I will insist on calling you Sevvy, and I doubt either of us truly wants that. However, I am willing to sacrifice my pride and fight fire with fire, if that is what it takes. Secondly, I hope you won't keep Harry locked away all Holiday; I would like to see him at one point."

"Rest assured, Nymphadora, that I have no intention of locking Harry anywhere." He shook his head and turned to Harry, saying so that Tonks could easily hear, "The lack of respect I receive from these people is abysmal."

Harry wondered briefly whom he meant when he said 'these people' but decided not to ask.

"Well," Tonks said exasperatedly, straightening her posture. "I won't keep you any longer." She gave Harry a warm smile. "Goodbye Harry," she said. "I hope to be seeing you soon. And you," she addressed Severus in an irritatingly sweet voice, as though addressing a very small child. "Try to get some sleep and rid yourself of that horrible caffeine addiction. This irritability you seem so prone to may diminish somewhat."

"I do not have a caffeine addiction," Severus growled, looking repulsed as she opened her arms wide.

"Whatever you say!" She said cheerily, wrapping her arms around him as he stiffened and winking at Harry. "Goodbye, Sev."

"Insufferable," was all Severus muttered as he was finally released. He looked at Harry, jerked his head towards the door, and stalked towards it. Harry supposed this meant he was supposed to follow, and quickly.

"Bye, Tonks," he whispered, waving his hand and smiling brightly. Severus' irascible attitude no longer scared him; quite the opposite, it rather amused him.

Harry had to struggle to keep up with Severus as they walked through the town. They were already on the outskirts when they arrived, but there was still quite a bit of distance between this area and the house… or at least, Harry supposed. He had never been there, so he really couldn't judge.

Slowly, the signs of civilization faded. Harry knew he was in trouble when the dirt pathway ended and a long, hilly field of overgrown grass and weeds stretched before them.

"It's not much farther," Severus promised him as they walked. "This is little more than an illusion. You would be able to see the house already if you knew where it was; however, I would prefer to wait until we are within the warding to show you."

"Okay," Harry agreed. This made sense; everything was out of their control until they made it to the house.

Harry was rather confused when Severus stopped in the middle of the field, seemingly pantomiming unlocking and opening a large gate. Harry frowned as Severus gestured for him to step through… step through something. Harry raised an eyebrow as he did so, but immediately understood when Severus handed him a small slip of paper.

Severus Snape and Harry Potter reside in the manor located outside of Flintshire, Wales, 1629 Dyserth Ln.

Harry could almost feel the surrounding atmosphere ripple as his eyes scanned the address. He squeezed his eyes shut at the overwhelming sense of power this area now exuded; the combination of Severus' and Dumbledore's warding and the magic the Fidelus charm utilized to reveal the area to him had a daunting effect.

"You can open your eyes, Harry," Severus said gently from his side, resting a hand on his shoulder.

Harry nodded and opened his eyes, lifting his head to inspect the house and grounds he now found himself in front of.

A dirt pathway with a smattering of large, flat stepping stones led up to the house. At the doors, it turned into grey brick, and divided to circle the house. Surrounded by the abandoned garden, the path there was overgrown by weeds and snarled plants, obviously not having been touched in years. Harry didn't think he'd ever seen dead plants look so menacing.

The front of the house and its surroundings were a dreary sight. The house was no mansion or castle, but it was undeniably large and quite foreboding. The entire house was dark, with a high, sloping black roof which placed a shadow over the entire front. Rectangular, with one half jutting out farther than the other and containing one heavy set of iron doors, it was made of a dark grey stone, parts of which had been overtaken by unruly patches of ivy. From the arrangement of the windows, Harry could guess that the house had three levels; the ones on the top level were worn and unfurnished, aside from the dark curtains that hung to guard the inside from light and keep prying eyes where they belonged.

"Don't let the outside frighten you," Severus said heavily, watching Harry's face. "Trust that Lily did all she could to balance its outer dark aspects with a sort of inner light." Harry made a face, and Severus waved him off, saying, "You'll see what I mean."

Severus pulled the doors open and led Harry into a sort of entryway. It was mostly empty, aside from one table and a large mirror hanging above it. Under his feet was a dark, glossy wood floor; he noticed with interest that it turned into a more narrow hallway made of the same floor, but with different walls.

"I think," Severus said, looking around, "that now would be the most opportune time to show you around the house."

Harry nodded. "You said it was a manor before," he pointed out as Severus led him down the hall. Its bottom half was panelled in the same wood as the floor was made from; the top half was painted in a deep shade of green. "Do you call it… Snape Manor, or… something?"

Severus turned his upper lip and frowned. "My father did. I simply call it 'the house'. It seems a bit pretentious to name a house after oneself, if you ask me."

Harry smiled in concurrence; he quite agreed. "So nothing like the Malfoy Manor, then?"

Severus gave an exaggerated scoff. "Well, their house is much larger than mine, and quite a bit more opulant This one, for instance, contains only three floors. Theirs contains five… and they have wings. The Western Wing, The Eastern Wing… you can imagine. Lucius was always quite obnoxious about his possessions; he had a name for every room in that house."

"Oh," said Harry. "Did you grow up here?"

"No," Severus answered shortly, abruptly changing topic. "This is the kitchen."

Harry was indeed surprised when he stepped into this room, for several reasons. For one, he would have expected Severus to have a formal dining room, to which house elves would bring meals. He knew that Severus owned one elf, whom he had not yet met.

"Your mother was adamant that we should turn this into a kitchen, rather than a dining room," Severus explained, looking both fond and annoyed at the same time. "She said it was her favourite room back at home."

Harry smiled at that thought, and gazed around the room. "I remember this," he said quietly, moving to run a hand over the taupe coloured countertops. Just as in his dream, the walls were a pale yellow, and the cabinets and cupboards were all white. He turned around and noticed that the same oak table with the white frame sat in the middle of the room.

"How do you remember this?" Severus asked, frowning and looking down at him through narrowed eyes.

"Those dreams I was having before," Harry started. "One of them took place in this kitchen. I had forgotten about it until now."

Severus didn't respond; he leaned against the doorframe.

"We can move on, if you'd like," Harry said after a moment. "I'm sure you don't want to spend your whole day in the kitchen."

Severus quirked his lips. "You assume correctly; allow me to call the house elf, and then we will move on."

Harry raised an eyebrow, unsure whether or not he wanted to meet this elf. If it was anything like Kreacher… Harry shuddered, and hoped it would be something more akin to Dobby.

"Tibby!" Severus shouted.

"Tibby?" Harry questioned, smirking.

"Well, I didn't name it," Severus replied, giving him a dark look.

"Yes, Master Snape?" A small, worried looking elf appeared at the doorway. She was sweet looking, and had a soft, innocent voice. She was on the border of being timid, but not so much that she appeared frightened of Severus. Harry hoped his father didn't treat house elves as badly as many other wizards… that just wouldn't sit well with him.

"This is Harry, my son," Severus told the elf, gesturing to Harry.

"Master Harry," Tibby greeted him, nodding and curtseying low.

"You are to answer to his calls, and obey him," Severus said, looking Harry over. "Though use discretion… this one is a trouble maker."

"Excuse me," Harry replied, looking offended.

Severus smirked and looked back at the elf. "You may disregard my last remark."

The elf nodded, but said nothing more. She stood there, awaiting orders.

"Is there anything you would need right now, Harry?" Severus questioned, knowing that the boy would feel odd ordering the elf around on his first day.

"Umm… no," Harry said, shaking his head. He was going to have to get used to the feeling of having a house elf around- she just stood there, blinking at him, almost confused about why he did not want her services at the moment.

"Very well," Severus replied. "Tibby, you are dismissed until further notice."

"Will masters be wanting supper, tonight?" she asked, looking up at Severus. Harry watched her eyes grow wider, and realized that she had been alone in this house for a very long time… she was hoping to have someone to take care of.

"You will be notified," Severus said, nodding.

Tibby nodded and curtseyed again, abruptly removing herself from the room afterwards.

"You're umm… nice to her, aren't you?" Harry questioned worriedly.

Severus raised an eyebrow. "Well I'm not cruel, but we're not good friends, if that's what you're asking. She's obedient, and quiet. I like that in an elf, so I see no reason to mistreat her."

Harry supposed this was a better answer than others he might have received.

"I will show you the parlour," Severus said now, stepping out into the hallway. "But we will rarely be in there. It's more for appearances than anything."

Harry could see why this was a room one would not want to spend much time in. It was so stringently neat it was unbearable, almost. It looked like the sort of room only a woman could enjoy; Harry supposed his mother had decorated it. The floor was a light wood, a majority of which was covered by a camel colored area rug, swirled with black and blue. The furniture was white, and a small white oak coffee table sat in the middle, adorned with a vase of flowers, two crystal figures of kneeling children, a bowl of potpourri, and several empty picture frames. Harry wondered briefly if Severus had been the one to take the photos out.

"I don't like this room," Severus said bluntly, moving through another door on the opposite side. "This is the sitting room I spent most of my time in. It was sort of a compromise; I couldn't handle it if the entire house was bright and cheery."

"Merlin forbid," Harry agreed in a serious tone, though he could not hide his smirk. Severus gave him a little shove.

Harry followed him into a much darker version of the previous room. The furniture throughout the room was made of a dark, rich wood, and the couches were covered with dark grey upholstery; they still weren't the black leather couches Severus had most likely fought for, but Harry could tell that his mother had tried to give him some of the gloomy atmosphere he liked… without making it unbearably gloomy for herself.

"I like this room better as well," Harry found himself informing Severus. He could see himself getting up in the morning and planting himself in this room. With the drapes open, it probably wouldn't be as dark.

"I'm glad," Severus said, sounding genuinely so. This surprised Harry; he wouldn't have expected Severus to care what he thought of his home.

They left this room and continued down the hallway. On the way, Severus pointed out the washroom and coatroom and the washroom, but didn't take Harry inside to inspect either. Harry wasn't disappointed.

Once inside the house, it didn't seem as large as it had from the outside. There was one hallway, which was set on a sort of curve so that it could carry one throughout the house without becoming another passage. On the outside of the curving point was a small, circular room; and alcove, really, as it was door-less. Here, a spiralling iron staircase, the same dark colour as the great iron door leading into the house, wound up to reach each of the three floors. It reminded Harry a bit of the staircase leading up to the Divination tower, only not as large.

Severus walked Harry past the stairs and down the hall, at the end of which was a singular wooden door.

"The library," Severus said, as he pushed open the door. "Also referred to as the study; you may call it whatever you like."

Harry stepped inside and looked around. This was truly (at this point) the most impressive room in the house. It was built on a curve similar to the form of the hallway, only wider and facing the opposite direction. It was done entirely in dark cherry wood; the texture and colour of the floors, furniture, and bookshelves blended so well that had Harry not known any better, he might have thought they were all carved from the same tree. The drapes over the windows and colour of the various chairs and fabrics was a deep midnight blue; it was not so dark that it could be mistaken for black, but it wasn't bright enough to overwhelm the senses. The walls were a lighter shade, accented with tones of grey.

In the section of the room farthest from the door was an entire wall of books, which extended as far as the ceiling would allow. There was even a moving ladder attached to the shelves, Harry noted. There were two desks; two separate study areas; one on the right side of the door, near the wall, and one to the left of the door and around the wall. They were adequately separated by another row of bookshelves which stuck out from the wall, reminding Harry of Hogwart's library.

"Why are there two desks?" Harry asked, looking up at Severus.

"Lily and I both needed a study, but she wanted to keep the room upstairs open in case… in case we had children," he explained unsmilingly, looking down at his hands as he said the last part. "We decided this room was large enough to section off; she and I also shared the habit of talking through our thought processes when they became increasingly unclear, and found that we often seemed to complete the each other's logic. This was quite convenient. I debated turning this room into a larger library with only one study area… but I thought perhaps you could make use of it."

Harry's mouth fell agape at this; for some reason, that Severus would offer to share this room with him, as he had with Lily, seemed profound. "Tha- thank you," Harry stuttered out, looking around. "Are you sure I won't be bothering you?"

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find some way to do that," Severus said, smirking. He softened his voice. "But I don't mind."

"Well… thanks," Harry said again, looking around. "Which desk do I use?"

Severus pointed to the right and said, "That one."

"Can I use those books?"

Severus considered this for a moment, strolling to the farthest end of the library. He peered at the titles for a few moments, moving along the wall, and finally sighed. "You may use anything you can reach without use of the ladder," he said, turning around and crossing his arms. "However, anything that looks remotely questionable, you will ask me about first. The books dividing the two studies are all standard; you could pick them up at any bookshop, so you may use those."

"Okay," Harry agreed, nodding. This sounded fair enough to him.

"Come," Severus said, striding past Harry and out into the hallway again. "I'll show you your room, and where I sleep in the case that you should ever need to wake me during the night. Our rooms are conveniently separated only by a small corridor which may be accessed from only our rooms."

Harry thought this was quite cool, but thought he'd sound rather juvenile saying such a thing. "What else is upstairs?"

"Anything I do not show you, do not investigate," Severus said.

Harry winced. "Well, how many rooms are you planning on not showing me?"

Severus slanted his dark eyes toward the boy. "Harry-"

"I'm sorry!" Harry exclaimed exasperatedly, shutting up after that. He had just been wondering exactly how many temptations he was going to have to resist.

Severus volunteered nothing as he led Harry up the dark staircase, but Harry continued asking questions.

"How do you keep your feet from making any noise on the stairs?" Harry asked in amazement. His own feet didn't make any noise, either, but he was wearing rubber soled trainers; Severus was wearing hard black boots.

"Silencing charms," Severus explained. "Do you believe that I would enjoy hearing you or anyone else clanging up and down the stairs all day- or night- long?"

"Well, my shoes don't make that much noise," Harry said defensively, looking down at his own feet.

"Yes, but Professor Dumbledore is just as fond of boots as I am, and he has promised to visit a great deal," Severus said, unable to keep that edge of annoyance out of his voice. He wasn't irritated by Harry's questions so much as amused; it was the thought of Albus frequenting his house that aggravated him. They reached the top of the stairs, and stepped into the hallway. Severus pointed to his right and said, "My room is the one down the hall, right there. Yours is down here."

"Has he really?" Harry asked, referring to Dumbledore, as Severus led him down the hallway. "For any reason, or…?"

"I think he's rather worried about you, actually," Severus said unappreciatively, raising an eyebrow.

Harry scoffed at this. "Oh, so now he cares how I'm treated," he said, rolling his eyes. "Sixteen years late, but I suppose it's the thought that counts."

Severus almost laughed at the sardonic tone of Harry's voice, but hardly thought Harry would appreciate his amusement.

"This," Severus said as they reached a great wall of glass windows, "Is the balcony. The glass door is in the middle; just look for the handle- there you go. It sits directly above the library; you might be aware of whether the windows are open before you carry on any sensitive conversations up here."

"Well, it's not like I'll be talking," Harry said.

"You will be if someone else is here."

"I can have my friends over?"

Severus raised his eyebrows and huffed in aggravation. "I've already told you that you may."

"I guess I just… forget," Harry admitted. "I'm not used to having that privilege."

"Understandable," Severus conceded. "Let us move on; I'll show you your room."

The two turned a corner and walked the short distance to Harry's room. They had passed only two doors on their way; Harry also noticed that there was still a lack of portraits… he had come to expect them in Wizarding homes.

Harry was surprised to find that all of his possessions had already been unpacked when he arrived. The room was done in warm tones, with mixtures of blue and gold. The floors and furniture were made of sequoia; gold drapes hung from the windows and from the bedposts on Harry's full-sized bed.

"It's lovely," Harry said sincerely, moving into the room and moving around the open space. He stopped at the window, admiring the way the light fell through and lit up the room. He hadn't expected it to be so… comfortable… homey, maybe that was the word. "I think this is the first Gryffindor colour I've seen in the place," he teased, sitting on the bed and turning his head to smile at Severus.

Severus inclined his head to the side, glad Harry liked his room. "The walls were previously silver, but I thought perhaps you would like something as warm as the Gryffindor common room… I could never handle the obnoxious maroon colour your house is known for, however, so blue seemed a better option."

"Wait… you did this?" Harry asked, widening his eyes and looking around. Every other room had been done by Lily, from what Harry had been told. And this was so… nice. He never would have suspected that Severus would have taken the time to do this for him, let alone do it so well.

"I did," Severus admitted, avoiding eye contact and looking around the room with feigned interest. "I must have learned something from Lily."

Harry laughed quietly and ran his hand over the duvet. "Thanks, Dad," he said softly, turning around just in time to catch the look on Severus' face.

"You're welcome," Severus said, inclining his head. Eager to take the focus off of himself, he pointed to the door across the room. "That door leads to my room. Should you ever need me, do not hesitate to come. I will keep that entrance unlocked, but knock before you enter. This door right here," he said, gesturing the other door just a few feet from the entrance in which he stood, "leads to your own washroom."

Harry nodded absentmindedly, still looking around the room. "I have a question," he said hesitantly, turning to Severus.

"And that is?"

Harry frowned hesitantly, scratching the back of his neck. "Is this… this room… am I going to be able to come back here?"

Severus narrowed his eyes. "Do you mean to ask if this is your permanent room?"

"Well, in a way… yes," Harry said, nodding.

Severus murmured thoughtfully to himself, moving to sit on the bed. "I am unsure whether Albus will allow you to live here during the summer. From what he has indicated thus far… he wishes you to return to the Dursleys. Even as I am your father, the blood magic will only protect you where someone with your mother's blood dwells. However, you may rest assured that you will always be welcome here, and this room will always be kept for you. It is yours."

"I don't want to go back there," Harry said quietly, leaning against the wall.

"Nor do I want that for you," Severus agreed, rising from the bed. "But your safety is more important than either of our wishes."

"Yeah," Harry breathed shortly, pushing off from the wall and abruptly leaving the room. "Let's just continue the tour, shall we?" he called from the hallway.

Severus tipped his head back in frustration and rose from the bed. "Listen," he said, following Harry out into the hallway. "Don't get short with me. You know I wouldn't let you go back there if it could be avoided."

"I know you wouldn't!" Harry exclaimed, stopping and spinning around. "But I'm sure Dumbledore could have found other ways to protect me without sending me there. And he can sit around and make all these excuses and everyone will go along with them because he is the "Great Albus Dumbledore", the "Only Wizard Voldemort Ever Feared"… and I am just the boy-who-lived, and as long as they keep me alive long enough to solve their problems, anything goes. Do you understand how frustrating that is?"

"I can imagine, yes," Severus said in subdued tones, treading carefully.

"I guess it can't be helped. It's not like I still really blame him all that much… I mean, that wouldn't really accomplish anything. I just… I wish it hadn't been me."

"We all wish that at one point or another in our lives," Severus said, tilting his head to the side and scrutinizing Harry's sour expression closely. "You don't think I said the same thing at least a hundred times when I was young? When I grew up, even? No matter whom you are or what your destiny is, you will always have difficulties, and you can never wish them away. Trying to do so only wastes time. I can sympathize, Harry, but I suggest you move on from this point. The sooner you fully accept it, the sooner you can become the wizard that will defeat Voldemort."

Harry shook his head. "I have accepted it-"

"No, you haven't," Severus countered, shaking his head. "You've accepted that the prophecy is true. You haven't accepted that there is no reason why it was you- you are still searching for some answer, or some way out. You won't find one. I can guarantee very few things, but that is one of them. You will never find any clear, logical answer to these questions."

Harry stared defiantly at Severus, who arched an eyebrow, daring him to argue. Shifting his jaw to the side, he let out a sigh. "Third floor, then?"

Severus continued to stare at him with that one raised eyebrow, prompting Harry to let out an agitated, "What?"

"I think we can cover that tomorrow," Severus said after a moment. "Let's have dinner, and then perhaps we can go through the library and pick out some materials to begin covering."

Harry narrowed his eyes. "You are maneuvering me," he proclaimed decidedly, pointing his finger condemningly at Severus.

"If you want to think of it that way, fine," Severus said as though he couldn't care less, knowing that Harry was looking for some sort of reaction. The boy wanted to have a reason to argue; he couldn't find a way to disprove what Severus had said about his need for acceptance, so he wanted to win at another argument. Severus, however, was not going to let their Holiday start out with a significant quarrel. "Is there anything you had in mind?"

"Wait- what?"

"In mind for dinner," Severus clarified.

"Oh- no," Harry said, crossing his arms. "Actually, I'm not hungry. I think I'll go to bed."

"Yes, they did serve a rather heavy food today at Hogwarts," Severus said, purposely missing his point. "I think I'll settle down for the night as well."

He was blatantly avoiding an argument, Harry realized. He could tell; the man was almost amused! This was outrageous. He was being handled. He didn't want to be handled, to be seen as a child who needed to be distracted from his anger, rather than have it dealt with.

"I don't much appreciate this, Severus," he said, not realizing how petulant he sounded until it came out.

"If you want to be treated like an adult," Severus said, stepping closer. "Then act like one. Until then, 'this' will continue. I am not going to sit here and argue with you. I've given you my opinion. Do with it what you want, but don't hold it against me."

Harry glared at him for a minute, then gave a grudging, "Fine… can I just see the third floor?"

"Are you going to stop this behaviour?"

"…maybe…"

"Harry…"

"Yes! Okay? Yes!"

Severus gave a groan and lifted his fingers to the bridge of his nose, pinching back the headache that was starting to form there. "You are acting like a five year old."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you- Harry!"

Severus' nostrils flared, and his lips pressed thin in frustration. Dumbledore had told him before departure that Harry might try to push the limits, just to see how far Severus would really let him go, but he had never suspected regression to such an immature level. He had certainly never tried this trick as a child.

"Fine," Harry said a moment later. "I'm sorry. Really. Can we just… pretend this didn't happen?"

It was an pitiful apology. Severus had doubts as to whether or not the boy really even meant it… but for the sake of his poor aching head and slowly degenerating level of sanity, he would accept it.

"I suppose," Severus complied tiredly. "Come, I'll show you the third floor."

"Am I to ignore all the other rooms on this level?"

"I won't take you into them, but I suppose I can sate your curiosity," Severus said as they headed for the staircase. "The one back there used to be the room Lily used for her study of ancient white magic… it's best that you don't enter there. It could not be salvaged; at least, not without several days of work."

"Salvaged… how was it ruined?"

"I… well, I was very angry when I was told that you were Potter's son… she left, and I… I needed something to vent my anger on. Her favourite room, complete with many breakable objects, seemed a good option at the time. Looking back on it I realize I was incredibly foolish to enter such a room and destroy with such rage… but at that point, I felt I had little to lose.

"This room is our old bedroom… I wish to keep it closed off, for obvious reasons."

Harry nodded and tried very hard not to imagine anything about those obvious reasons.

The third floor was like a very large attic of sorts; there was no hallway- rather, a small room with a door, which led into a larger room which seemed to take up half the house. There were many doors around the room, most of which had counters and tables blocking them. Only small amounts of light could stream in from the small, semi-circular windows near the low, slanted ceiling; all other light was provided by the torches mounted on the walls. Actually, the room quite reminded Harry of the dungeons.

"I've been renovating," Severus explained as Harry looked around at the dark, stone room. "We'll need a place to work on the Alcruor Prosapia Potion… I'd prefer not to travel back and forth between here and Hogwarts."

"We?" Harry questioned, reminded bitterly of the fact that he would not be here.

"Well, Miss Granger, and possibly Professor Dumbledore, will need to assist, at times."

"Hermione? Here? Don't you think that will be a little… weird?" Harry questioned, wrinkling his nose.

Severus raised his eyebrows incredulously. "What exactly are you suggesting?"

"Wha- oh, no! Nothing like that!" Harry objected, waving his hands frantically. "I was just… she's probably going to feel rather awkward around you, after you yelled at her like that on Thursday.

"Ah, that," Severus said, lifting his chin and smirking a bit. "If she can't learn to work outside of her comfort zone, then she will never reach the high aspirations she has undoubtedly set for herself. I would be doing her a disservice by not allowing her this opportunity to grow as a better worker."

"Oh, so you have honourable intentions? That's why you feel the need to insult her."

Severus sighed. "Gryffindors," he muttered to himself. "Those rooms," he said, changing the subject and gesturing around the room, "are not for your sight. If you enter them, I assure you; I will know, and you will suffer. Understood?"

Harry widened his eyes a bit, thinking Severus was rather melodramatic at times. "Yes, I'll stay out," he promised, mentally eliminating all possible thoughts leading to his entering those rooms.

"In fact," Severus said on second thought, looking around the room. "Just… don't come up here, period. Unless I'm up here, that is. Even then, it's best if you stay on the two lower levels."

Harry sighed. Why didn't anyone ever trust him? His curiosity wasn't that strong. "Got it," he replied dejectedly.

"It's not that I don't trust you," Severus said, following Harry down the stairs.

"Then what is it?"

Severus thought for a moment, than sighed and said, "Well, I suppose it is that I don't trust you… but I wouldn't trust anyone to stay out of a room that they were told specifically not to enter. I am simply attempting to avoid a catastrophe."

"Yes, that's me," Harry said resentfully. "A walking disaster."

"You know that I do not think of you that way."

"Do I?"

"Good question; do you?"

"What?"

"I have tried to make myself clear on the fact that I no longer think of you in such negative terms," Severus said, folding his arms. "However, your comment would indicate that I have not made my point clear enough. I do not care what trouble you've caused in the past. I revoke every negative remark I have made towards or about you during your first five years of schooling. Does that make everything clear, or need I explain further?"

"Yes, I'm touched," Harry said flatly, placing his palm on his chest.

"Stop it," Severus said irritably, jerking Harry's hand down. "What is wrong?"

Harry shrugged.

"I'm not going to guess," Severus said, crossing his arms.

"I don't know what's wrong," said Harry, shrugging again.

"Search deep and find the answer," Severus demanded dryly.

"I really don't know… I suppose I'm just in a bad mood."

"I think you've spent too much time around me," Severus said thoughtfully. "I must be rubbing off on you."

Harry laughed weakly. "No, I don't think that's it. Maybe if I sleep on it…"

Severus nodded. "Come, we'll have a cup of tea first, and then retire. It has been a long day."

Harry nodded gratefully and followed Severus down the hall. The older man grasped his shoulders from behind and gave him a little shake. "And then, perhaps tomorrow, we'll talk about those essays."

Harry groaned, but allowed himself a small smile. So Severus wasn't going to lose his temper with Harry… the only problem seemed to be that Harry was likely to lose his own. He shook that thought out of his head. Like Severus had said, it had been a long day… he was tired, irritable, and anxious about the upcoming weeks… yes. No matter. A night of sleep, and he would be fine… at least, he hoped.

xxx End Chapter 35 xxx