The woman standing at the door was a fairly portly, dark skinned woman with quite a lot of curly hair sitting precariously atop her head with a horrible red ribbon tied into it that reminded Harry way too much of Umbridge. He shivered at the very thought. She had a clipboard held to her breast and a never-out quill clasped in a hand bedecked with talon-like fake nails, which reminded Harry of Rita Skeeter. This woman already boded ill.
“Good morning Professor, Mr. Potter,” Adeline Luther greeted the two interviewees as she entered the dungeon quarters. She took a quick look around and noticed all the towering bookshelves, groaning under the weight of hundreds of books. At least she knew the boy would have ample opportunity to study whilst living with the Potions Master. “Shall we get started then?”
Severus led the way into the sitting room, a fresh tea service already prepared on the coffee table, the mess from breakfast vanished. Dobby must have been informed and appointed to take care of their dungeon quarters for the day. Severus was quite glad for it, no matter how insane the little elf was.
“Please have a seat wherever you’d like. Would you like a cup of tea?” Severus asked as he waited for the woman to decide where to sit before seating himself. He felt slightly annoyed when the woman chose his armchair to sit in, but brushed it off as he sat down beside Harry on the sofa. Maybe it would be better to be closer to Harry just then.
“A cuppa would be quite welcome, thank you. I take two sugars, no cream,” Mrs. Luther said as she settled herself into the comfortable armchair, settling her clip board on her lap and laying her quill down as she accepted the steaming hot cup of tea from the Potions Master.
There was silence for some minutes while the three occupants of the dungeon quarters sipped at their tea and glanced nervously around at each other. Finally, when the tea had dried up and there were no further distractions, the Casewitch lifted her quill and fixed the prospective father and son with a sharp look.
“I will not lie or sugar-coat anything. That is my one and only warning, and the one and only thing I ask in return from the both of you. I did not enter your home with the intentions of ruining your hopes of becoming father and son, and yet I did not also enter with the hopes of granting such a wish. What is said here today will be the ultimate deciding factor, not my own decision afterwards. Is that all clear with everyone?” Adeline asked, waiting for the nods of assent before she continued.
“Very good. Now, we’ll start with the most obvious question, at least in my opinion. Why do you wish to adopt Mr. Potter, Professor?”
Severus felt his stomach churn and his mind simply went blank. He couldn’t think of the answer he knew he would give for this question; it was gone. He took a few seconds to get himself back under control before answering.
“Well, there is no simple answer for that question, Mrs. Luther. I knew Harry’s mother back when I was a student at Hogwarts myself, and we were very good friends for many years. After her tragic death fifteen years ago, I made a promise to her memory that I would protect her son from the harm that so affected her. Unfortunately, I did not always have the chance or ability to protect him from danger, and he has suffered for it. Now that I have the power and ability to protect Harry properly, I do not intend to let the boy face anymore needless danger.
“However, that is not the only reason I wish to adopt Harry. This past summer, once again, Harry found himself in grave danger. He lost every last family member he possessed, and had nowhere to go. I took him in, though mostly grudgingly, and I took care of him as best I could. Then the tables turned, and I was the one who was in need of care. Harry, along with my good friend and colleague Remus Lupin, nursed me back to health and assisted me in every way possible after I was almost killed. I grew to respect and appreciate Harry much more than ever before, and that respect turned into affection and fondness that I never thought myself capable of. He brought out a part of me long hidden and mostly dead, and made me feel alive again. I love Harry, and I want to do everything I can to help keep him safe and well cared for. Adoption is something that would both satisfy my need to care for Harry, as well as Harry’s need for a proper guardian, who will take care of him the way he deserves.”
There was a long pause while the Casewitch scribbled away on her clipboard, a soft smile on her face the only sign of any reaction to what the Potions Professor had just admitted. Severus could feel Harry trembling beside him, and he did the first thing he could think of to calm the boy; he grabbed for his hand and held it tightly and reassuringly in his hand. The trembling subsided almost immediately.
“So, Mr. Potter, do you concur with Professor Snape’s story?” Mrs. Luther asked, glancing down at their joined hands with a subtle smile.
Harry took a deep breath, extremely grateful when Severus gave his hand a light squeeze. He could do this; all he had to do was be honest about how he felt. Like both Severus and Mrs. Luther had said, he couldn’t lie or sugar-coat anything.
“Everything Severus said is true and right. This summer, I lost almost everything, including nearly losing my life. Severus provided me a home and medical care, as well as everything I would need: food, clothing, and even extra magical training. Even though we had never been very close as a student and Professor, we grew much closer and our relationship changed dramatically. Severus is my mentor and the person I go to for everything. I grew up without parents, or even affectionate guardians.
“My aunt and uncle were not very good people, and they were prejudiced against my magical background. They hated me, and never wanted me in their home, even if they did grudgingly provide me houseroom. Severus loves me and takes care of me like the father I never had. Even if this adoption doesn’t go through for some reason, I will still think of Severus as my father, and I will still love him just the same. The adoption is important because it makes it official, it makes it real. We both deserve that.”
This time, Mrs. Luther was staring at Harry, a slightly shocked look on her face as her quill hung limp in her hand. It was another few seconds before she snapped out of her reverie and started scrawling on her parchment once more. When she looked up, her smile was wider and warmer than it had been before.
“Well then, I think there are only a few more questions I need to ask before I’ll be on my way to make my evaluation. It is clear that the both of you have thought long and hard about this decision, and there is no lack of love between the both of you. Though the Ministry is reluctant to let single parent adoptions take place, it is much different when the adoptee is nearly of age themselves, and the importance of this adoption does not seem rest on the fact that Harry needs a guardian, but it is symbolic and sentimental that it become official and legal that you become father and son.
“The last question I will ask of you, Harry, is how you feel about Severus’ past association with the Dark Arts, and the group of terrorists who are the self-appointed Death Eaters.”
The tension in the room became suddenly very noticeable and palpable. Harry felt Severus stiffen beside him, and it was his turn to squeeze the older man’s had in his own to offer some sort of comfort. He turned back to Mrs. Luther and smiled.
“Everyone has their ways of dealing with emotional and physical trauma. Severus, much like myself, suffered at the hands of the people who were supposed to love and care for him as a young child. Years of abuse and mistreatment by those who surrounded him even while at school turned into indignation and anger. He turned to the wrong people for a reprieve, and took whatever acceptance he could get. Unfortunately, the only people who would welcome him with open arms were the Death Eaters and Voldemort. He made mistakes, as humans often do, and he has paid for them in kind ever since. He has turned his life around and changed his ways. Like a wise man once said, ‘Everyone is stupid at fifteen’. I do not hold Severus’ past against him, and I forgive him for once associating with the people who are now determined to see me dead.”
Harry felt Severus squeeze his hand particularly hard and looked over at the Potions Professor, touched and slightly guilty to see the man holding back tears. He squeezed back and smiled when Severus finally met his eyes, glad to see the smile returned. They both jumped at the Casewitch cleared her throat pointedly.
“One more question, and I’ll be out of your hair entirely. Professor Snape, as you know, the Ministry is a little prejudiced when it comes to single parent adoptions. They always prefer that the child have a steady, balanced home with both a male and female influence in their home life. You listed yourself as single, but sometimes prospective parents who have not married yet are simply still dating. Is there anyone you consider to be your significant other that could, perhaps in future, become a second parent to Harry?”
True to his form of being the best liar in the Wizarding world, Severus shook his head in the negative with a straight face. “No, I am not dating anyone at this time. I simply haven’t had the time for any sort of romantic relationship. My life consists of my job as a Potions Master, and Harry’s guardian.”
Harry slowly released Severus’ hand, folding his arms across his chest as a frown took over his features. This was the hardest part of the interview so far, he thought. It wasn’t fair, and he hated that they had to lie about this. He became lost in his own head, so much that he didn’t hear the Casewitch ask him a question.
“...I want you to be honest when you answer...”
“I will not lie or sugar-coat anything. That is my one and only warning, and the one and only thing I ask in return from the both of you...”
“...Harry? Are you alright, dear?”
Harry blinked and looked up, noticing that Mrs. Luther and Severus were both staring at him with a concerned expression. He shook his head slowly, meeting Mrs. Luther’s eyes directly.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch your last question.”
“I asked if you were ok with Severus remaining a single parent. You didn’t seem to have a very good reaction to the situation. In fact, you look extremely uncomfortable,” said Mrs. Luther, her expression one of slight suspicion and curiosity.
Harry panicked. He had no idea what he was supposed to say. If he couldn’t lie, then he couldn’t answer, and if he didn’t answer, it would become automatically a suspicious situation. He blanched and looked pleadingly at Severus.
“I...uh...I don’t really mind...I mean to say that...”
“I’m sorry Mrs. Luther, but I’m afraid I’ve asked too much of Harry when it comes to this specific topic. I regret to say that I have broken your only rule and I was dishonest with you. I am indeed in a relationship with someone, and to answer your other question again honestly, I hope they will be able to become Harry’s second parent,” Severus said barely above a whisper. He couldn’t handle seeing Harry struggle with this. He’d asked Harry to lie unfairly, and he had to set things right himself. Unfortunately, Severus was afraid this would be the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back, and ruin the chance for adoption.
Mrs. Luther wrote something down on her clipboard before looking up, a single eyebrow arched. There was no trace of her former warm smile. “Why, Professor Snape, would you lie about something as important as that, and how could you possibly ask Harry to go along with this lie? Clearly the boy is distressed about the entire situation.”
“I was wrong to lie to you, and I was very wrong to ask Harry to lie. The reason is not good enough, but it is this; I was afraid the adoption would be immediately denied as soon as the identity of my significant other was learned. I was completely unfair to everyone involved when I made this decision, and I do sincerely apologize.”
“I think the people you should apologize to are Harry and your significant other, who was disrespectfully treated like some dirty little secret. Just out of pure curiosity because of such dramatic circumstances, who on earth could you be associated with that would put the adoption in such jeopardy?” Adeline asked, almost afraid of the answer she would receive.
Severus swallowed the lump in his throat, his cheeks burning in shame. He wasn’t ashamed of being with Remus, of course not. He was ashamed that he had forced the man out of the picture due to his own fears. Mrs. Luther had been completely right; he had treated Remus like some dirty little secret, and it wasn’t fair.
“My lover is Remus Lupin, a male and also a registered werewolf.”
Mrs. Luther’s other eyebrow shot up to join the other among her dark curly hairline.
“Well, the secrecy is certainly understood now, I must say. As I said before, I will not lie or sugar-coat anything, so I must be honest when I say that the Ministry would surely hold such association against you. However, since Mr. Lupin is not your spouse, and cannot legally become your spouse at this time, his relationship to Harry is irrelevant. The fact of the matter is being homosexual is not illegal; therefore I cannot hold that against you. Also, dating a registered werewolf is also perfectly legal, so I cannot, in good standing, use that as a reason to deny you the chance to adopt this young man whom you clearly love and care for. What I am saying, Professor Snape, is that your fear is unfounded, and certainly unnecessary.”
Adeline wrote one more sentence on her clipboard before standing up and extending her hand first to the Potions Professor, then to young Harry. “I appreciate your complete honesty, and I’ll be sure to keep it in mind when making my evaluation. You should expect the answer of the Adoption Committee in a few week’s time.”
Severus stood, glad when Harry followed his lead; the boy really was a fast learner. He escorted the Casewitch to the door, politely opening it for her and giving a half bow. “Thank you, Mrs. Luther. We gladly await your answer. Have a pleasant afternoon.”
“And you as well Professor, Mr. Potter. I bid thee a good farewell.”
“And a good farewell we bid thee,” Harry answered the traditional saying. It paid off to be best friends with the smartest witch in their year, after all.
Severus waited until Mrs. Luther had made it halfway down the hall before closing the door to their quarters and turning to Harry, an apology already on his lips.
“Don’t. Please don’t apologize, Severus. I should be the one to say sorry. I just panicked, I couldn’t think of what to say – ”
“Harry, stop!” Severus said firmly, properly cutting Harry’s rambling apology off. He shook his head slowly. “I should never have asked you to lie for me, nor should I have ever allowed the opinions of other people to affect me so much. You were right the entire time; I’ve been horribly unfair to Remus, and I owe him an apology as well. I’m sorry, Harry.”
Harry sighed and nodded, stepping closer to the Potions Master and hugging him tightly for a few seconds before pulling away. “I forgive you. It’s a good thing Mrs. Luther was so open minded. We got lucky when they sent her to us.”
“That we did. Now if you’ll excuse me for a little while, I think I need to go apologize to Remus for being such a prat. I’m sure you’re just dying to tell Draco everything, so go ahead,” Severus said with a small smile as he opened the door, intending on heading up to the Defence corridor.
“Actually, Draco and I were wondering if we could go to Hogsmeade to do some holiday shopping. Neither of us has had the chance to do any yet,” Harry said in a hopeful voice, putting on his best innocent expression.
“I don’t think I’d be comfortable sending the two of you alone, even just to Hogsmeade, Harry,” Severus said with an apologetic look. He hated to have to deny Harry his freedom, but it was simply still too dangerous.
“Oh, we wouldn’t be alone! I asked Hagrid to escort us and stay with us the whole time, and he’s agreed to come. Please, Severus?” Harry asked in earnest.
Severus sighed, his emotions warring with each other until he finally gave in to Harry’s pleading look and gleaming, beautiful green eyes full of hope. “Well since you seem to have it all planned out and Hagrid has agreed to go with you, I guess it would be fine. Just be careful, and please be back before dinner.”
“Thanks Sev!” Harry beamed as he gave Severus another hug before heading off to his room to put on something more comfortable to walk around Hogsmeade. He of course had to grab his money pouch as well.
Severus watched the young Gryffindor tear off to his room, smiling to himself as he left their quarters and made the long journey up to the Defence corridor. He paused outside the door to Remus’ office, trying to gather his thoughts and prepare how he was going to apologize. Just as he was about to knock, the door opened and Remus was there, smiling widely at his lover. It was like seeing the sun come out after a horrible storm.
“Severus! I was just about to head down for tea in the staff room, but I’ll gladly take it with you instead. Come in,” Remus said, dragging Severus in by the hand and closing the door behind him. He walked over to the door connecting his office to his quarters, which had been mostly abandoned in favour of spending his time in the dungeons with Severus and Harry.
“So, how did it go? Was she a stuffy old coot, or did you get one of the nicer ones? I knew a woman about ten years ago who worked in the Department, and she said you get all variety of Caseworkers in there. I assume it went well, since you seem to be in a fairly good mood – Severus, are you alright?”
Severus had paused in the doorway to Remus’ quarters, a soft smile of adoration on his face as he watched the man he loved bustle around, preparing tea and chatting away. He blinked as Remus questioned him, shaking his head to clear it.
“I’m sorry, Remus.”
“Oh it’s alright, you’re probably just distracted and nervous from the interview still. Come – ”
“No, Remus, I mean I’m sorry for being such an idiot. I should never have tried to hide our relationship from the Ministry. It’s not fair to you at all, and Harry was completely right to be upset with me about it. Regardless if you understood why I thought I needed to do it, it wasn’t right. You shouldn’t have to be my dirty little secret. I love you, and I want the world to know it.”
Severus moved into the room, pulling Remus close to him even as the werewolf tried to insist that he had nothing to apologize for. He pressed his lips firmly to Remus’, loving how this simple act could turn his lover to butter in his arms. He pulled away and stared directly into the werewolf’s eyes.
“Move to the dungeons with Harry and I. Move in with us for real instead of just spending the nights there. I want you there with me, and I don’t care what anyone thinks. I told the Casewitch about you, and she as good as told me that there will be no problems because of it. You belong with Harry and I.”
“I...Severus, you told her? You didn’t have to do that! What if...oh, Merlin, if the adoption is denied because of me I’ll just die, Severus. I can’t believe you – ”
Severus cut off Remus’ rambling with another kiss, lingering this time until he felt the tension melt from the werewolf’s body. He reluctantly pulled away as the need to breathe became too great.
“If Dumbledore has no qualms about it, I would love to move into your quarters, Severus. Now tell me how the interview went!” Remus insisted as he sat down on the sofa and pulled Severus down with him, grabbing for a cup of tea.
Severus smiled as he took up another cup of tea and sipped from it before going into an explanation. Remus had agreed to move in with him; nothing could ruin this day.
S~S~S~S
The air outside was bitterly cold, the sky a dark gray that threatened heavy snowfall. Despite the weather, Harry, Draco and Hagrid were merrily walking along the main street of Hogsmeade, sipping at hot cocoa as they looked at the shop windows, stopping here and there when they saw something they thought someone would like.
As they passed the display of Quality Quidditch Supplies, Draco let out a deep sigh, frowning into his cup of cocoa.
“Are you ok, Draco?” Harry asked as he examined the newest model of racing broom currently on sale; The Falcon. Harry had been slightly concerned about Draco throughout the whole trip, glancing at him every once in a while as the blonde sighed dramatically.
Draco nodded as he avoided looking at window display of Scrivenshaft’s, trying to ignore the handsome peacock feather quill set he knew his mother would have loved. He’d been excited to buy gifts for the few people he could remember in his life, but hadn’t thought about how hard it would be to not be able to buy gifts for the people he had lost.
“Yeah, I’m ok. I just...I never thought it would be so hard, not shopping for my mum or dad. I see so many things they would like, but then I remember they can never have those things. It’s like its fresh...even if I grieved before, I don’t remember it, and so I’m grieving again. I’m sorry; I don’t mean to be such a black cloud.”
As if on cue of Draco’s words, soft flakes of puffy white snow began to fall from the dark clouds above them, settling in their hair and on their sweaters and scarves. Harry smiled at Draco and pulled him close for a hug and quick kiss.
“It’s ok, love. You’re not being a black cloud. I know how you feel, trust me I do. Maybe you could write to your father. He won’t be able to receive a gift, but maybe hearing from you will be a gift enough for him. As for your mum...well, maybe you can’t actually place a gift in her hands, but I think I might know a way you could still give her something,” said Harry, feeling his nerves kick in as Draco gave him a curious look.
“Oh and how could I possibly do that?” Draco asked, his tone sceptical and his expression slightly confused. What on earth was Harry talking about?
“You could have a memorial erected for her. It doesn’t have to be anything huge, just something special; something that you can go to and remember her when you need to.”
Draco stood staring at the Gryffindor for a long time before he threw himself into Harry’s arms. He took a deep breath, breathing in Harry’s unique scent and he suddenly felt very peaceful. “You’re brilliant, Harry. I have the perfect idea; I just need to talk Dumbledore and Professor Sprout.”
Harry smiled and nodded bemusedly, wondering what the Herbology Professor had to do with anything. He pulled away and headed towards the door of Scrivenshaft’s. “Come on; let’s see if we can find anything in here for Remus.”
S~S~S~S
The dungeon quarters were strangely quiet for the number of people who were there. Harry sat down his bags of shopping as he realized Hermione had been crying, her face buried in Remus’ shoulder, Severus sitting on the other side of the werewolf, rubbing his back slowly. He felt his heart sink as he figured it all out on his own.
“When?” Harry asked as he walked over and knelt in front of Hermione, taking one of her trembling hands in his own. He looked over to Severus, who was also clutching a scroll of parchment in the hand that wasn’t currently comforting his lover.
“Just a few hours ago. Molly apologizes for not coming to inform us right away, but they felt the need to sit with him for a time to let it sink in. She sent this letter; you can read it if you want,” Severus said, handing the scrolled parchment out to Harry, who took it, but made no move to read it.
“Harry? Are...are you ok?” Draco asked from behind, feeling like he was intruding on a personal family moment. He didn’t belong here, he knew it, but he wanted to make sure Harry would be ok.
Harry stood up and walked slowly over to Draco, not saying a word as he slipped his arms around him and pulled Draco close, resting his head on his shoulder. “Why does everyone I love die?” Harry whispered, causing Draco’s throat to constrict as he held the Gryffindor close. He knew he was the only one who heard Harry whisper, so he didn’t respond out of respect.
“The funeral will be on Saturday. Remus will escort you and Ms. Granger to the Burrow. I’m sorry I cannot be there with you, Harry, but it would be far too dangerous. Who knows what kind of trouble I would attract if I were to attend,” Severus said, his tone solemn and apologetic as he frowned at Harry.
Harry nodded as he pulled away from Draco just enough to be able to see Severus. “So I guess it would be pointless to ask if Draco could come.”
Severus sighed and shook his head, only noticing then that Remus had grown quite stiff under his massaging hand. “I’m sorry, Harry.”
“Can I talk to you in private, Severus?” Remus asked as he slowly peeled Hermione away from his chest. The Gryffindor had properly cried herself into fitful sleep. He laid her gently down across the couch as he stood up, pulling Severus back into the bedroom they now shared.
“Are you alright, Remus?”
“No, I’m not. I don’t think I can go to the funeral with Harry. I just...it’s too much for me to handle right now, Severus, what with the full moon the day after Christmas. It’s too much grief.” The werewolf was leaning with his back against the door, his hands scrubbing tiredly at his scruffy cheeks. He had no desire whatsoever to be anywhere near a funeral, not since the last time he attended one, he proverbially buried his husband.
“Remus, please; you know I cannot go. Harry needs you right now. You’ll have your Wolfsbane for the full moon. Please don’t do this to me now,” Severus pleaded, cupping Remus’ cheek in his palm. He knew what this was about, but he had no desire to fight with his lover over Black right now.
Remus sighed heavily, knowing he was probably promising something he couldn’t stick to. He nodded slowly, allowing himself to be pulled into a kiss. “Ok...I’ll go. I’ll take Harry and Hermione.”
“Thank you.”
S~S~S~S
Harry didn’t have the heart to wake Hermione up and send her to her dorm, so he pulled out an extra blanket and carefully laid it over her. He was just about to turn away to tell Draco goodnight when Hermione woke up, blinking tiredly through her messy curls.
“Harry? I must have fallen asleep, I’m sorry,” she mumbled, rubbing her eyes as she sat up and let the blanket fall into a bundle in her lap.
Harry turned back and sat down beside her on the sofa, grasping her shoulder in a comforting gesture. He hadn’t spent much time with Hermione this year due to the fight with Ron, but in that moment he realized how very much he missed her.
“It’s alright. You can sleep down here if you want, Severus doesn’t mind. I was just about to go tell Draco goodnight. I’ll be right back, ok?”
Hermione nodded as she covered her mouth to stifle her yawn. “Go on, get your goodnight kiss,” she said with a quiet giggle, dodging the pillow that Harry tossed her way.
Draco was still standing in the doorway, chuckling at Harry’s blush as they walked out and down the hall together to Draco’s personal room. Draco whispered the password to the portrait protecting his room, but didn’t enter. He smirked as Harry pulled him close and pressed his lips gently against his own, trailing his hand through his soft golden locks.
“Are you sure you’re alright, Harry?” Draco asked quietly, moving a stray lock of messy black hair out of the Gryffindor’s eyes. He hadn’t had a moment alone with Harry yet, and he’d been dying to make sure he was ok.
Harry sighed as he leaned into the Slytherin’s touch. He’d been very upset earlier, and he hadn’t thought about what he’d said at the time. Now he realized that he might have been a bit dramatic, but it wasn’t a false statement, either. Harry seemed to be plagued with death all around him.
“Yeah, I’m alright now. I was just...really upset. The last thing I said to Arthur...I was such a prat to him. I never got to apologize to him, either. It just seems like every time I lose someone, there’s always something left unsaid, and I’ll never have the chance now.”
Pulling Harry close to him once more, Draco kissed him gently, lingering against his lips to offer some sort of comfort. He felt a wetness on his cheeks that was not his own tears, and he pulled away to dry Harry’s eyes.
“I’m sure he knew you were under a lot of stress, and that you never meant for your words to hurt him. You can’t beat yourself up over this, love. You’ve got to let it go, so you can mourn with everyone else, and then start to move on. You’ll be alright, Harry. The Weasleys love you; I’m sure they won’t hold any grudges against you,” Draco assured his – his what? Maybe it was time they finally defined what they were.
“Harry...We never really officially asked each other out, so...can I call you my boyfriend?”
Harry felt his stomach do a flip. Draco was right, neither one of them had asked the other out, it just sort of happened. He smiled at the idea of calling Draco his boyfriend, even though only a few months ago, that thought probably would have made him laugh himself silly. He nodded as he leaned in and kissed Draco once more. “Yeah, you can call me your boyfriend, but only if I can call you mine.”
It was another ten minutes before Harry came back into the dungeon quarters, his hair a bit more messy than it was when he left. His blush and small smile were enough to make Hermione giggle until her eyes watered. He flopped down on the sofa beside Hermione, laughing when she rolled her eyes at him.
“There’s no denying it now, Harry. You’re smitten.”
Harry tried to hide his darkening blush, but then thought better of it. He wasn’t ashamed of his relationship with Draco; there was no reason to hide it. If Severus and Remus could be more open about it, then why couldn’t he and Draco? He smiled at Hermione and nodded.
“Yeah, I guess I am. Who would have thought, eh? If you would have told me a year ago that I’d be over the moon for Draco Malfoy, I’d have told you to get your head examined by Madam Pomfrey. He’s just so different now. But to be quite honest, I started fancying him before the accident this summer. When he showed up at the cottage, he wasn’t the same Draco Malfoy we knew before. He’s been through a lot, Hermione, stuff I can’t even tell you. Severus doesn’t even know parts of it, but I can’t tell him. I can’t tell anyone. He needs me, and I need him. I just don’t see anything wrong with that.”
“There isn’t anything wrong with that, I agree, Harry. I just think you should both be careful. He may seem perfectly normal now, but he’s still healing, he’s still slowly getting his memories back. I’d say not to devote yourself to him because things could change really fast, but I fear it’s much too late for that. The only thing you can do now is just be there for him, even if it starts to get a bit rough as his memory comes back,” said Hermione, offering Harry a warm smile.
“I missed you. This year has been kind of crazy,” Harry said with a frown. He’d been so wrapped up in Draco that he hadn’t really made time for Hermione in his life. He’d make sure he’d do better.
“When isn’t the year crazy, Harry? If you’re here, it’ll be crazy. I’ve missed you too. I’m sorry about all the trouble with Ron. Maybe now he’ll rethink his views. Professor Snape obviously cares about you, and so does Draco. How could Ron begrudge you the chance to be happy and finally have a family of your own? Sometimes I just can’t believe how naive and selfish he can be,” Hermione said, her facing going red in ager as she twisted the blanket around in her hands distractedly.
Harry reached over and pulled the abused material out of her hands, letting his hand linger against hers for a few seconds. “His intentions are good, or at least he thinks they are. He’s stubborn, but only because he cares. Things will probably change now, though I’m not looking forward to telling him that Draco is my boyfriend. We’ll just take it one day at a time, and hope that he finally realizes how much of a prat he’s being.”
Hermione sighed heavily and smiled softly at Harry, her eyes over bright, but still dry. She leaned over and hugged her best friend tight, lingering for a few long seconds before pulling away and kissing Harry on the cheek. “Thanks, Harry; you always know what to say. I guess we should both get some sleep. The next few days are going to be rough.”
Harry frowned as he nodded solemnly. Hermione had never said anything more true in her life. He stood up and bid her goodnight, all the while thinking to himself, “Yeah, Christmas is going to be awfully gloomy this year.”
S~S~S~S
“I don’t think I can go, Severus,” Remus whispered against his lover’s chest as they lay in bed together, post-coital and exhausted. He traced a lazy pattern on Severus’ bare chest, loving being able hear the gentle thump-thump of his heartbeat right below his ear.
“Harry will need you there, Remus. You know I cannot attend because of the danger I would be putting everyone in, and Harry will need someone to lean on, someone other than his friends.” Severus’ arm was wrapped securely around Remus’ waist, holding him tightly against him as their sweat slicked bodies cooled rapidly in the already over-moist air of the dungeons.
They had discussed this already the same night of Arthur’s death. It had gone without saying that it would not be safe for Severus to go to the funeral, but Harry had planned on having Remus there with him, and Severus refused to let the boy go without an adult guard. Molly would be much too busy grieving over her husband and comforting her own children to pay too much attention to Harry’s safety, which was quite understandable.
Remus, however, had been adamant that he did not want to attend the funeral. He had explained it as it being just too much for him to handle, but Severus was not a stupid man; he knew it had everything to do with Sirius Black.
There had been no body to bury when Black had died, but there had been a memorial service held anyways, and a headstone placed in Godric’s Hollow. Severus had grudgingly attended, not wanting to disappoint Dumbledore or seem horribly disrespectful to Remus. If he was honest with himself, he had already held a soft spot for Remus even back then. When had he gone so damn soft?
Remus had been devastated with Black’s death. They had been lovers off and on since their Hogwarts years, and even went as far as a Joining of the Souls bonding ceremony mere months before the Animagus fought his final battle. It was understandable that Remus would be terribly uncomfortable at a funeral, but no one liked attending such things. Yes, it would bring painful memories back up to the surface, but Remus was not the only one to have lost a loved one; he would not be the only one reminded of another death, of another funeral that hit much closer to home than a fellow Order member or friend.
“I would hardly make a good escort for Harry, Severus. I would be so distracted, I’m afraid I’d let my guard down and something would happen. There’s bound to be some sort of trouble, what with that many Order members gathering, and Arthur’s death was not exactly a secret to the Wizarding world. After his promotion, he became an extremely important man; that Prophet article will be just the tip of the dung heap, mark my words,” Remus said in a matter-of-fact voice, thoroughly irritating Severus and ruining the after-glow of a wonderful night.
“Do not pretend like you would be irresponsible or stupid enough to ever allow Harry to be in danger. Even when Black fell, you made sure you held Harry back from going after him. Do not lie to me, Lupin,” Severus snapped, knowing the comment about Black could well get him hexed or punched. He didn’t much care at this point; in his opinion, Remus was being completely irrational. If worse came to worse, Severus would polyjuice into Remus himself and attend, letting the werewolf sulk by himself at home.
Remus clenched his eyes closed as his breath caught painfully in his chest. Severus was right, too right, and Remus felt horrible for trying to use Harry as a scapegoat. The loss of his long time lover was still so fresh, so raw that Remus had chosen to ignore it and push it away completely so he didn’t have to feel the grief. But without grief, there was no healing. Even after everything that he and Severus had been through, he still mourned his dead lover like Sirius had died yesterday.
“I’m sorry, you’re right, Severus. I shouldn’t have said that about Harry; of course I would never let Harry come to any harm. I just...Oh, Merlin, I can’t talk to you about this,” Remus said in a pained voice as he extricated himself from Severus’ arms and began looking for his clothes that had ended up strewn across the room. He found his shorts and tugged them on as he stood up, reaching for his trousers that were hanging from the desk chair.
“Where are you going, you live here now, remember? And why can’t you talk to me about it?” Severus said angrily as he sat up in bed, making no move to dress himself, just simply pulling the duvet over his chilled body as he watched Remus button up his shirt and look around for his socks.
Remus stopped casting around for his other sock and looked up at Severus. “You hated Sirius, and with good reason, I’ll give you that. But nothing I say about him will matter to you, Severus. I don’t expect your sympathy on the matter at all, but I do wish for understanding, which I know you cannot give because of the relationship between you and Sirius.
“I can sit here and tell you how broken I feel every time I think of him till I turn blue in the face, but you won’t care, and I hardly expect you to. So I’ll make things easier by not saying anything at all, because I’m sure you can guess everything I would say anyways, so there’s no need for me to even bother.”
There was a long silence as the two men simply stared at each other. Remus had not continued his search for his sock, and Severus had thrown back the duvet and reached for his shorts to pull them on. Once he was at least partially covered, Severus stood up and moved towards Remus, pulling the single sock out of the man’s hand and tossing it aside as he pulled Remus close to him.
“I may not have ever been fond of Black, but I do care that you’re still so upset about his passing. This isn’t about my feelings towards Black, it’s about yours. As much as I didn’t like the man, I can understand that you loved him, and losing him hurt more than you could ever explain. I would never begrudge you your grief, Remus, no matter my feelings towards the person you are grieving for.
“As for feeling broken – well, I can try everything in my power to put you back together again, and I will learn how, eventually. I know I can never take the place of Sirius in your heart; you’ll always hold him there, no matter what. All I ask is that you make room for me, and stop assuming I’ll cast aside your feelings when it comes to this kind of thing. I do love you, Remus; please do not doubt that.”
Remus had wrapped his arms around Severus automatically and rested his head on the man’s shoulder. Warm, salty tears splashed onto Severus’ bare shoulder and trailed down his back and chest as the werewolf let go some of his pent up emotions. “I love you too, Severus. I’m sorry I can’t give you all of me...”
“I will take whatever you are willing to give, and I offer myself completely in return,” Severus whispered, holding tightly to the man in his arms. When Remus had first come on to him, Severus never thought it could have worked because of their past, and like he had told Remus before, he had been afraid to let himself fall in love. But as Severus stood there, holding the man he loved in his arms as he cried, he couldn’t imagine his life without Remus in it from then on.
S~S~S~S
The weather was appropriately drab as Remus, Harry, and Hermione arrived with their portkey in hand. The Burrow looked strangely empty and sad, almost as if the house was mourning like a part of the family that lived within. A few other people had already arrived, trekking across the long field and making their way through the back gate of the Burrow’s garden.
A large canopy had been set up, squaring off a large part of the backyard. There were no seats or elaborate pedestals from which to make speeches, just a quaint black casket set upon a high altar, pleasant blue and white flowers surrounding it. Underneath a tarp, hidden behind the altar was a deep hole, dug by hand as was a tradition in the Weasley family and most Pure-blooded Wizard families who didn’t use mausoleums to house their deceased.
Molly and her six children stood by the back door of the Burrow, waiting for the mourners to arrive and greeting them solemnly as the group grew larger. It was a private funeral, by invitation only – hence the special portkeys. What with Arthur’s recent promotion, many people had contacted the Weasleys about funeral arrangements, but only those closest to the family and the entire Department of Magical Law Enforcement were allowed.
Molly smiled sadly through her tears as Harry and Hermione approached, Remus standing a few feet behind them. She gathered both of the teens into a tight hug, patting their backs and telling them not to cry too much for Arthur; they were to celebrate his life, not mourn his loss. No one was wearing all black, but everyone had on many different shades and styles of dress robes. Wizarding funerals differed from Muggles in that they focused on the deceased’s life, not their death.
“Thank you for coming, all of you,” Molly said as she gave Remus a quick hug as well. She ushered them to the side to stand with the rest of her children, even though they had insisted on lingering with the other guests instead of intruding on the family’s territory. Molly scolded them quite nicely until they agreed to stand as part of the family.
“Hey, Harry,” Ginny said quietly, smiling softly at him. She obviously still felt bad about how she and Ron had treated him recently, but Harry wouldn’t bring that up now.
“Hey, Gin. Holding up alright?” Harry asked quietly as Hermione gave Ron a lingering hug, trying to fight off more tears as Ron stroked her hair back. Harry had a feeling they’d be getting back together soon.
Ginny’s eyes welled with tears as she shook her head. A small sob escaped her throat as she hugged Harry, burying her face in his chest. “You called me ‘Gin’.”
Harry didn’t know what to do other than hug her back, rubbing her back soothingly. He looked to his left and saw Fred and George leaning against one another, obviously gaining comfort from their twin. Bill and Charlie were greeting other guests, and of course, Percy was not there. Harry felt more saddened than ever by that fact.
The soft murmur of conversation had gone suddenly quiet, making all the Weasleys, Harry, Hermione and Remus turn to see what had happened. A noise like a wailing infant broke the silence as Molly spotted Percy walking through the field and entering through the garden gate. She took off at a run faster than most thought her capable of, nearly knocking her third eldest son to the ground as she engulfed his lanky frame in a tight, tearful hug.
“Oh, Percy!”
The other Weasley children didn’t move. Harry looked around and saw six identical glares pointed directly at Percy, the rage practically radiating from the siblings. Ron had let go of Hermione, and Ginny had pushed herself away from Harry. Had it not been extremely serious and saddening, they way they all pulled their wands at the same time would have been quite humorous. It was so obvious that the Weasleys were very close-knit, which just made the fact that one of them had passed that much more horribly sad.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Ron snapped, being the only one irrational enough to express what his brothers and sister were thinking.
Percy looked up as Molly drew reluctantly away from her third born. He definitely looked quite dreadful. His eyes were blood shot, he had lost too much weight, his skin was very sallow, and his hair seemed to just wither. His expression was deeply sad and pleading as he took a step towards his siblings.
“I’m so sorry...I wanted to come say goodbye to dad, I needed to. I couldn’t possibly live with myself if I didn’t say goodbye one last time,” he said quietly, eyeing all of their wands nervously as they seemed to surround him.
“You should have thought of that when you told dad he was insane for siding with Dumbledore about Voldemort’s return. You don’t deserve to say goodbye after what you put him through!” Fred snapped, his eyes blazing with anger. If it was one thing to see Fred or George in high rage, it was another to see them together, mad as hell.
“Stop it, all of you! Put your wands away this instant! You should be ashamed of yourselves,” Molly hissed as she drew up beside Percy and wrapped an arm around his waist, as she was too short to wrap it around his shoulders.
“Percy made a mistake, but he’s only human. Do you think if Dad were here, he would be proud of your foolish defence of him? Your father would never begrudge one of his children the chance to pay their respects and say goodbye, no matter what had happened in the past. You would all do well to remember that Percy is still your brother, and he is still mine and your father’s son, foolish mistakes aside. Dad would be so ashamed to see such hatred within his children. That’s not how you were all raised!
“Isn’t the death of your father enough to make you all see that there may not be time to hold grudges? One of you could be next, I could be next. What if it was Percy and you’d all never forgiven him, what then? Think about how you’d feel! Now imagine how Percy feels, never having been able to reconcile with Dad, then you tell him who doesn’t deserve the chance to say goodbye.”
The Weasley children were all properly chastised and well in tears. Six wands were slipped back into inner pockets, and a large group hug was initiated when Ginny launched herself at Percy, clinging to his robes as she cried she was sorry.
Shortly after, everyone gathered around the small marquee in the back garden, whispering their final goodbyes to Arthur as they added a single flower to the lid of his casket, each representing a different well-wish to take with him on the next journey. As was tradition, all the Weasley men and Harry (and Ginny, because Molly couldn’t persuade her otherwise) lowered the casket into the pre-dug grave, and reburied it by hand. A headstone was placed flat into the earth, marking Arthur’s final resting place forever more.
Afterwards, a wake was being held inside the Burrow, with lots of Molly’s delicious cooking to go around. How the woman could manage to cook so much wonderful food while grieving for her husband, the world would never know.
Harry was standing off to the side of the majority of the crowd, Remus and Hermione close by his side as they watched Percy catch up with the rest of the Weasleys from afar. Though Fred and George still looked at Percy like he was an overripe can of flobberworms every so often, the rest of the siblings seemed to have accepted Percy back quite easily. Molly was so glad to have her third eldest son there with them that she clung onto his arm and patted down his hair every few minutes, thoroughly annoying him, but not enough to make him comment on it.
Harry was just about to comment on this to Remus when there was quite a commotion at the fireplace, making the room fall silent almost immediately.
“All Magical Law Enforcement personnel are to report to Azkaban Fortress immediately! I suggest all other patrons quickly make it back to their homes and stay there until further notice. There’s been a mass break-out, and there are high profile Death Eaters on the loose as we speak. Please act with the utmost caution and please do try to stay as calm as possible! I’m very sorry to have to interrupt, Molly.”
The Auror that was speaking was one that Harry didn’t recognize, but his combat robes were recognizable immediately. After a few seconds of silent shock, the room broke out into much chaos. Molly was slightly bewildered as upwards of twenty people all tried to apologize and say goodbye, some turning to the floo, while others traipsed out the back door and disapparated beyond the wards.
“Harry, Hermione – we should head back to Hogwarts now and inform Severus of what’s happened, assuming he doesn’t already know. I know you’d probably rather stay here with the Weasleys a bit longer, but I really think it would be best if we got back to Hogwarts, where it’s a little bit safer,” Remus said quickly, his panic mostly masked by his calm expression.
Harry sighed and nodded, leading the way over to the Weasleys so they could say a proper goodbye. “I’m sorry Mrs. Weasley, but I think it’s best if I returned to school. I wouldn’t want to put you lot in anymore danger, just in case any of the Death Eaters decide to come looking for me here. I’ll write to you, I promise, and I’m so sorry about Arthur.”
Molly sniffled as she pulled Harry into a tight, tearful hug, mumbling her thanks and love all the while. She was obviously overwhelmed, so Harry moved on to the Weasley siblings, first hugging Ginny, then pausing as he and Ron made eye contact for the first time since Harry had first been informed of Arthur’s illness.
“I’m really sorry about your dad, Ron,” Harry said quietly, knowing the rest of the group was listening and waiting to see what would happen.
Ron swallowed hard and nodded, feeling extremely uncomfortable with so many eyes on him, even if they did belong to his family. “Yeah, me too. I guess I’ll see you at school after break, then?” His tone was slightly hopeful, and his expression was contrite. This was clearly his way of apologizing without having to actually come out and say it.
The immense relief that Harry felt was almost palpable, and before Harry could respond in kind, Hermione had launched herself at Ron, hugging him so tight he could hardly breathe. After she released him, he didn’t have much time to catch his breath before she was kissing him heartily on the lips, making most of the witnesses blush even deeper than Ron was himself. Once they separated, Harry had already said goodbye to the remaining Weasleys and was waiting with Remus by the floo.
“See you at school, mate,” Harry said with a chuckle as he saw the bemused, elated and shocked expression on Ron’s face.
“Uh huh, sure...” was Ron’s detached, rambling answer.
“Come Harry, we must be quick with this information, especially if Severus is none the wiser yet.” Remus glanced around nervously before leaning close to Harry’s ear and whispering, “Lucius Malfoy was probably one of the escaped Death Eaters, Harry. He’s probably making a hasty line towards Hogwarts to get to Draco.”
The coloured drained from Harry’s face even as Remus moved away and grabbed for the floo powder, placing a small amount in Harry’s and Hermione’s hands before taking a pinch himself. How could he have been so stupid and distracted not to have thought about Lucius Malfoy, and how Draco would probably be affected by this news? Turning back towards the floo, Harry waited for Remus, then Hermione to disappear into the flames before throwing his floo powder down amongst the ashes.
“Severus Snape’s personal quarters, Hogwarts!”