Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Insights and Nightmares

After the rather eventful day in the Room of Requirement, Headmaster Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall brought the two children back to the Headmaster's Tower. This time, both children sat in their highchairs and Dobby brought them their dinner.

"They is not looking so bouncy this evening," remarked the house-elf.

"I should think not," laughed the Headmaster, "They have caused enough mischief for one day."

"Mischeef, Mischeef!" laughed Severus.

"Yes, mischief," said Minerva as she handed him his spoon.

Since the first day Severus had spent as a child, he seemed to have gained more trust in his two carers, especially Dumbledore. When he was hurt or upset it was Albus alone that he wanted. Harry, on the other hand, had spoken very little since taking the potion. At times it seemed as though he would like to, but was too frightened. Dumbledore wondered if he had been permitted to speak at all with the Dursleys. He suspected not. Still, he reasoned, it was only Harry's first day and there was plenty of time to build up trust with him.

Another thing, which worried Albus, was that Harry ate very little. He recalled a vague reference that Molly Weasley had made to the effect that the Dursleys sometimes deprived Harry of food as punishment. The boy had been very thin when he first came to Hogwarts. Albus felt very guilty that he had not kept a better eye on Harry as he grew up.

These thoughts, and many more, ran through Dumbledore's head as he gently coaxed Harry into eating half of his dinner. He made a mental note to ask Madam Pomfrey about using nourishing and energy potions in the child's food. Harry would have to work up to larger dinners.

Severus's eating habits were a sharp contrast. The boy would eat everything he was given, but would become very frightened if he spilled anything. He would shrink back in his chair as if expecting Albus to strike him. Dumbledore had suspected for a long time that Salazar Snape, Severus's father, had been a very violent man. Indeed, the circumstances surrounding the death of his wife Arianna were very suspicious. On the few occasions in which Severus had opened up to Albus about his home life, he mentioned that his father expected "men to act like men". The man clearly made no allowances for children to act like children.

When Dumbledore had met Arianna Snape, he saw that she, at least, loved and cared for her son. It was fear of some of Salazar's wrath, which stopped her from intervening in some of the boy's harsher punishments. Unfortunately, it was not until young Severus had come to teach at Hogwarts and began to trust Albus, that the old man found out more about the horrors of his family life. He did tell Albus that his father forced him to join the Dark Lord at sixteen. *If only I hadn't shown such blatant favouritism to the boys who bullied him. He might have confided in me and let me help him. *

Dumbledore's gloomy thoughts must have shown on his face because Harry suddenly withdrew from him and whispered "Sowee". Young though he was, Harry was used to looks of disappointment or disapproval. He had no way of knowing that Albus's reproach was self-directed.

"What are you sorry for, Harry?" the Headmaster asked in surprise. Harry merely shook his head and repeated the apology.

Suddenly, Dumbledore remembered something he had read in child psychology about young children being very intuitive, and therefore able to detect the positive or negative feelings around them. He pushed his unhappy thoughts away. They were not helping matters here.

"Harry? It is all right child. I am not angry with you. I promise," Albus said gently.

It took a little more convincing before Harry would make eye-contact with Albus again. When he did, Dumbledore held out his arms to him. To his relief, Harry responded by standing up in his chair to be lifted out. The Headmaster cuddled him on his lap as they finished dinner.

Severus watched Dumbledore gather Harry into his arms. He suddenly felt very put out. Why wasn't Albus cuddling him? Was Albus tired of him now that he had a new little boy?

Minerva chose that moment to clean Severus up and unstrap him from the highchair. She was about to take him out when he pulled away from her.

"No! Want Abus to!" he cried.

"Albus is holding Harry, pet, " McGonagall tried to reason with him, "Why don't you let me help you?"

This was apparently the worst thing she could have said because the little boy began to cry.

"NOOOO!" he sobbed.

"Albus, when these two are in bed, we need to talk," McGonagall said, "Why don't you give me Harry and see to Severus?"

Dumbledore handed her the green-eyed toddler and she sat down again. Harry buried his face into her robes. The noise frightened him, reminding him of the tantrums of his spoiled cousin, Dudley. Albus quickly crossed to the weeping Severus and took him up into his arms.

"What's wrong, my little one?" he murmured as he rubbed comforting circles on the small back, "Are you tired, hmmm? Do you want me to put you to bed?"

This only made Severus cry harder.

*I am definitely losing my touch. * thought Dumbledore mournfully as he started to calm the child with soothing noises, instead of words. **************************************************************************** **

Ten minutes later, Severus had quieted and peace was restored to the room once more. Professor McGonagall summoned a house-elf and asked her to run a bath for the children. She hoped it would help them to relax before bedtime. She had watched both boys carefully throughout dinner and had come to a few difficult conclusions. She sincerely hoped that Dumbledore had seen some of it too.

When the bath was ready, Albus herded the children into the bathroom while Minerva retrieved some cloths and bath toys. Severus still refused to relinquish his hold on Dumbledore so McGonagall took care of Harry, undressing him and setting him into the water. The moment he was in the bath, he stood up, looking fearful.

"Harry. It is all right pet. It's just a bath." McGonagall was confused.

"Warm," said Harry in a whisper, "I not 'lowed"

"Oh, Harry! Of course you are allowed a warm bath!" exclaimed the shocked professor. *What on earth did those dreadful Muggles do to him? * she thought.

After a little more persuasion she managed to get Harry to sit in the bath again. He even picked up some toys, though he played with them carefully as if afraid he would break them.

Albus was having a difficult time hiding his anger at the Dursleys. He wondered how much more about Harry's life was left to discover.

Severus sat in the bath but seemed to have the same fear as Harry about touching the toys. It was only when Albus started to play with him that he would pick them up. The two adults allowed Severus and Harry to play and splash in the water for a while. They spoke quietly to the children as they washed them. When the water began to cool, Harry and Severus were taken out and dried.

Once they were ready for bed, Dumbledore gathered them up and sat in his rocking chair to read them a story. They were both sleepy and curled close to him as he read. By the time he was finished, Harry and Severus were fast asleep and Minerva helped to put them to bed. That done, they returned to the sitting room.

**************************************************************************** **

"Well, I certainly learned a lot from that," remarked Dumbledore as he took a comfy seat by the fire.

"I think we have a few problems, Albus," Professor McGonagall was not one to beat about the bush.

"Yes, go on," encouraged Albus.

"We have two young children who have each had very difficult lives, vying for your attention."

"They have you as well," Dumbledore pointed out.

"Yes, of course they do," said Minerva impatiently, "And I am here to help when I can but it is not my attention that they want, it's yours."

"Why so?" asked Dumbledore.

"Oh don't be so obtuse Albus!" McGonagall was getting exasperated. "You are the one stable person in their lives, as adults and as children. They trust you more than anyone else. You are in a position to make or break them.

"That's comforting," said the Headmaster dryly.

"Albus," Minerva managed to calm herself, "You need to be careful. You saw what happened tonight. Severus was clearly getting jealous of Harry. You need to be sure to pay them equal amounts of attention as far as possible and better still, you should try to spend time with each child alone."

"I know," sighed Dumbledore, "And I will do my best. I still believe we did the right thing. I want to give them back something they should have had all along."

"I know you do," McGonagall said, "But we must tread carefully. I think you should talk to Madam Pomfrey again. We do not normally deal with such young children. We need to know a little more about it."

"You are right, Minerva. I will try to see her within the next couple of days."

"Good," McGonagall stood up, "Now I must go to bed. I think I'm getting too old for this."

"You? Never!" scoffed Dumbledore, his blue eyes twinkling once more, "Goodnight, my dear and thank you."

**************************************************************************** **

All in all, thought Albus, It had been a very long day and going to bed seemed like an excellent idea. He knew he would need a lot of energy in the days to come. Half an hour later he was climbing under the warm covers, letting sleep overtake him.

Harry was dreaming,

He was in his playpen when he heard his Daddy's frightened voice.

"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off."

His mother quickly snatched him into up her arms. She stumbled with him into a smaller room, the door opened.

"Stand aside, you silly girl," came the high, cold voice of Lord Voldemort.

"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead." He felt his Mummy shaking.

A shrill voice laughed and a green light shot towards him. He heard a scream. Green was filling his vision. He was falling. There was nothing but screaming.

Dumbledore had just drifted into a light sleep when he heard the sounds of restless movement in one of the cots. Harry then began to scream. For the second time that day, he leapt out of bed and ran to Harry's cot. He feared that the boy's scar was hurting from a vision of Voldemort. The boy's face was as white as chalk and he was shaking uncontrollably. His scar, however, looked normal.

"Harry," Dumbledore called gently, "Can you hear me Harry? It's Albus."

But Harry seemed to be in another world: one filled with terror as he witnessed the cruel murder of his parents. He wanted his Mummy. He wanted his Daddy. What had the bad man done to them? It took a lot more quiet words fromAlbus before Harry focused on him.

"B b bad man," he stammered out, "B b bad man hurt Mummy and Daddy."

"Oh, my poor child!" Albus took Harry into a warm embrace, "My poor baby." He cradled Harry to him and paced the room for a while, humming gently to the shaking toddler. A small whimper drew his attention to Severus. He appeared to be asleep but upset nonetheless. He went to the cot and reached in to soothe him. He murmured assurances and stroked the soft cheek and dark hair until Severus quieted.

Harry would not be calmed so easily. Eventually, Albus climbed into bed with the small boy still in his arms. He lay down, holding Harry, and sang softly to him until he fell asleep. Sleep would not come so readily to Dumbledore now. He lay there in the darkness for a long time, thinking about the horrors these poor children had suffered and wondering how to help them in the coming weeks.

Chapter End Notes:
I did warn you! It is angsty. You will, of course, recognise the quotes from Harry's dream as being from "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban." Chapter 9, "Grim Defeat". Take care until next time.

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