Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Author's Chapter Notes:
um...hello earthlings? i did a quick checkup on the recent updates, and wow! half of the stories are mine! is that just me?! you only have "a day" left of the spring fest so hurry up and write something! personally i would have stopped writing if it wasn't for that stupid itch at the back of my mind...
so read and enjoy, don't forget to review and tell me about my mistakes.
hugs and kisses to all of yah!
;)
Chapter 1
Ding dong the witch is gone

"Are you done with the dinner Harry?" Severus asked, his head bowed over his stack of essays.
"Uh huh, I'm finished daddy." the boy hopped off his chair and picked up his plate dutifully, or at least pretended to.

"Not so fast son, put the plate back and eat your carrots." Harry groaned, pulling a face. How did Daddy know everything?! He wasn't even looking! Harry sat back on his chair reluctantly and put the plate back on the table with extra care. He sighed, resting his chin on the palm of his little hand.

"Can I go to the bathroom please?"

"It's 'may I ' and why do you have to go the bathroom, with your plate?" Severus finally looked up, narrowing his eyes playfully. Harry slumped down and pouted.

"The carrots, Harry." the man softly nudged, his parent radars working furiously as he watched Harry with a pointed stare.

"But... They're icky!" Harry gagged, pushing the plate away.

The potion master raised his eyebrow. "They're not, carrots are good for our eyes, remember?"

Harry whined, pushing his glasses up his nose. "I already have glasses!"

"And so does professor Trelawney, you don't want to be like her do you?" Harry looked horrified at the aspect. Auntie Sybille's glasses were /huge/! It made her look like a bug! Harry didn't want to be a bug!

"But daddy..."

"Harry, remember our rule? We eat everything on our plate to the best of our abilities." Severus stood and hoisted Harry on his hip before sitting back down on Harry's chair. Harry his his face in Daddy's robes, and Daddy sighed, pulling the plate back towards Harry.

"It's just carrots Harry, I promise, they're delicious." he prompted, running his slender fingers through Harry's untidy hair. Harry needs a haircut, he thought absently.

"No, Daddy I don't want to."

"How do you know they're not delicious if you haven't even tried one?" he picked up s carrot stick and held it to the five year old.

Harry closed his mouth, no, he did /not/ want to eat the icky veggie , and he will not.

Daddy sighed and popped a carrot stick in his mouth.

"See? Hmm! Try one now, go on!"

Harry shook his head stubbornly, fisting his hands on Daddy's robes.

"Then no story for you tonight Harry." the man said firmly, he calmly picked the boy up and put him down on his chair before sitting in his own. Harry's mouth fell open, tears of frustration rolling down his cheeks.

"But.. But daddy! I don't want to!" he couldn't believe that Daddy was denying him, his nightly stories! Daddy has never done that before, it was simply unfair!

"We don't want to do a lot of things, but we have to because they're good for us." Daddy explained softly, painting on his essay paper with red ink. Harry wanted to paint on the essays with red ink! Why did Daddy get to do that and Harry had to eat his carrots /and/ go to bed without a story?!

"Eat the carrots child, please." Harry frowned, wiping his tears away hastily. He knew that daddy didn't like it when he acted bratty and whiny like Dudley, but Harry really didn't want to the carrots!

"What about a compromise then? You eat three tonight, and we'll leave the rest for tomorrow."

Harry relented very slowly, picking one by the tips of his fingertips and slowly sniffed the thing, Daddy rolled his eyes, but left him be and went back to his painting.
Ever since he and Daddy had moved to Hogwarts, Daddy was always painting with red ink, or always writing with his super cool quill Harry wasn't allowed to touch. Daddy was always in classes, talking non-stop about boring potion making. Harry wrinkled his nose, Daddy never allowed him to cook potions with him. Daddy didn't allow a lot of things, now that Harry remembered, he never allowed elbows on the table, or laundry clothes in his room, or having fangs (Hagrid's dog) in his room and on his bed. (which Harry thought was totally unfair.)

And now, Daddy was threatening him with withholding stories. If there was anything Harry loved more than bunnies, it was his night time stories, and he just loved it when Daddy read to him. Specially his favorite book. The witches of Dakota.

He opened his mouth and stuck his tongue out, placing the stick in his mouth experimentally. He chewed the hard veggie with his baby teeth and a disgusted expression on his face. The baby teeth he would outgrow in a few years, but he and daddy both knew that the disgusted expression was kinda fake. Harry picked up another stick and tossed it in his mouth. The carrots were actually good, they were crunchy, he thought. Maybe Daddy was right, but then again Harry would not admit that out loud. So he went on with his dramatic play, and painstakingly took another carrot.

Daddy sighed and shook his head, arching his eyebrow.

"It's just for the story." Harry held his chin high and bit into his stick. Daddy shook his head.

"Of course."

Xx

"And then the kind witches of Dakota, pointed their wands at Nova and all sang along with tibby, topi, trotter and turkey ; Ding dong, Ding dong, the Witch is gone!..."

What a stupid rhyme, Severus thought while reading to Harry. Unfortunately the witches of Dakota was Harry's favorite story book, Severus sighed. Trust his son to pick out the most annoying and catchy rhyme in children's book.

Other children like the tales of beedle the bard, or Magical Matilda series. And his son loved Witches of Dakota of all books, fifteen pages of tongue twisting words with stupid rhymes. And the ironic part was that the damn book left Severus muttering the lines in his mind all day after reading the thing, even his occlumnecy shields couldn't keep the stupid story out of his mind.

Once he even said the line while giving a lecture, now as his first year at Hogwarts, reputation was everything. Just to hold up his ego, the potion master had no choice but to give all of the class detention for laughing and wrote a complain letter to the author. Still waiting for a respond...
The damn rhyme was everywhere, just last week, he had made a total fool out of himself by calling Minerva the witch of Dakota in a staff meeting. Ever since then, he was looking for any excuses he could find to get rid of that book.

The problem in that solution was that Harry rarely did anything bad, or broke any rules, and when he just looked at Severus with those big round green eyes like a kicked puppy, Severus had no choice but to accept his fate beforehand.

Getting rid of the book itself, also proved to be another problem, when Severus found out it always popped up in Harry's room. Apparently Charity had saw it fit to charm Harry's favorite book so he would never lose it. Severus tried to uncast the spell everyday. To no avail. Women. He rolled his eyes.

No matter if he burned the book, or flushed it down the toilet or passed it to a house elf. The book always ended up in Harry's hands. Severus wanted cry, this book was turning into his personal nightmare. And he knew, that Harry knew that, and thus was enjoying every second of it.

"Ding Dong the witch is gone!" Harry mumbled groggily and closed his eyes. Severus sighed and leaned down to kiss the child's head.

"Goodnight Harry."

"Goodnight Daddy." the boy hugged him tightly and then got under covers, Severus put the book on Harry's nightstand and stood, he left the door ajar in case his son needed him and got out of the room.

There was still the forth years essays to go through, and the tests he had to grade, he had to give his lesson plans to Albus the next day and he still hadn't got the coffee he wanted since dinner to keep him awake long enough to do all of this tasks without dosing off to sleep.

Severus had mixed feelings about his job. Being a teacher, even though it was his first year, proved to be harder than he had expected. He could practically feel himself aging as a cauldron exploded in his classes or when the students fooled around with dangerous ingredients, on the other hand, the salary was very good, and it seems like a shame to just pass it away like that, also a good reputation in his job resume could do wonders for his mastery career.

Ding Dong...

With a stiff back Severus sat behind his desk and started marking the papers first.

Ding Dong the witch is gone.

No! Severus shook his head. Concentrate Severus! Concentrate! No rhymes. He read every paper intently, word to word instead of skimming through it like he normally did. He would not repeat that obnoxious rhyme ever again....

Ding Dong the witch is gone.

Shut up! Severus slammed his fist down on the table. Taking deep calming breaths, the man gave up on the essays and stood up. This could wait, he thought and strode to his bedroom slowly, counting from One hundred backwards as he went through his nightly routine.

Ninety-nine, the Witch is gone.

Ninety-five, the Witch is gone.

Eighty-two, Ding Dong, Ding Dong.

Severus bit on his lip, would oblivating one self prove one admitting to one's weaknesses? Severus had never been oblivated, but merlin! He had to get that thing out of his mind!

He took another deep breath and washed his face with freezing water.

Maybe he should summarize the pepper up's ingredients in his head. Potions always helped him relax.
Severus put on his pyjamas and got under the covers, sleeping rigidly on his bed, unmoving and his eyes clamped shut.

Chopped Flobberworms.

Crushed green beans

The essence of asphodel

Turkey...

Wait, what?!

Severus jolted in a sitting position. Eyes wide. Turkey?! Where the hell did that come from?! He groaned, closing his eyes in resignation. He breathed in and out, that's it Severus... In, and out. Concentrate on the breathing only.

In. Out, in, out...

He smiled after several minutes. He always enjoyed a good Nova.

He growled, balling his hands in frustration. Yoga. Not Nova. Not Nova! He gave up on sleeping and got up, there was no point in meditation anyways, he just had to let himself tire out. Or better yet, take a dreamless sleep potion. Severus smirked. Now, that sounded like a good idea.
The cold floor under his feet sent shivers up his spine, one of the reasons why he loved the dungeons so much, the air was always a little chilly. He hated warmth, or anything associated with it.

Of course Harry always had his own room conditioned, since the child had a very bad immune system, but the boy equally liked the chill down in their quarters, thank merlin it was already spring break, one more week of dunderhead students and exploding cauldrons, and then bliss. Teaching has occupied nearly all of his free time with essays and papers, and he felt like he hadn't spent enough time with his son as he was supposed to, hence the obvious need for story reading every night.

As long as Harry forgets the rhyme for at least one day... He thought darkly, shaking his head.

Severus stealthy made his way around his lab in the dark, heading toward his desk.

By tomorrow morning, which thank merlin, was a Saturday. Severus would get rid of that stupid story for a while , and could finish his work.
If only Harry thought the same...

"Ding Dong, Ding Dong the witch is gone! Ding Dong, Ding Dong!" Harry sang happily munching on his breakfast. Severus pursed his lips and skimmed through his daily prophet, determined to focus on the articles for once.

"Ding Dong, Ding Dong!" The small child dangled his feet and grabbed his favorite snitch mug filled with milk.

"Daddy?" Severus sighed in relief and dropped his paper, looking at Harry with a forced smile.

"Yes Harry?"

"Can we read Ding Dong the witch is gone today?" Severus groaned, grinding his teeth.

"No Harry, but you can find another book for us to read?" anything but that, he pleaded in his own mind. Anything, but that story book.

"No, I want that one." Harry frowned, a thick line of white milk mustache covering his face. Severus smirked and picked up his handkerchief.

"What about we go out and play with Hagrid ?" he cleaned Harry's face as he said this.

In all honesty, he had no time for playing with Harry today, all of the essays he had left yesterday and the papers he had to go through were still lying on his coffee table in the living room. Maybe Harry could go with Hagrid? That would keep the child busy for at least three hours before he got bored.

"I want to stay with you Daddy. Can I paint too?" Harry gave him the puppy eyes and Severus found himself feeling frustrated and guilty at the same time.
"You can paint in your coloring book while I do my work hmm?" he suggested, summoning an elf to take their breakfast away.

"But you paint with red ink in Students papers. I want to do that!" Harry pouted, latching himself to Severus's legs, and Severus sighed.

"Harry, I don't /paint/ on their essays, I grade them."

"I want to do that too!" Harry shrieked in mirth and ran straight to the living room. Severus cursed and ran after him, scooping him up before Harry could get his hands on the papers.

"Daddy!" Harry grinned, and hugged his neck, acting as if he and Daddy were playing tag again. Harry loved it when they played tag.

"No Harry, we do not touch what isn't ours." Severus scolded the child softly, sitting him on the couch. Harry looked thoughtful for a moment before nodding wisely.

"That's what Nova said to Tibby Daddy. Am I Tibby?" he asked innocently. Severus cursed inwardly in five languages. He just had to bring that book up didn't he?
"No you're Harry." he said firmly, praying that Harry dropped the book.

"Harry the Tibby!" he squealed, bouncing on his seat. Severus wanted to smack himself. With a chair.

"No, You're Harry James. Not Harry the Tibby." he must have sounded harsher than he intended to, Harry was five years old after all.

Harry paused, his bottom lip trembling slightly as he stared at Severus with huge glazed over eyes. Severus winced. He knew that look, that look was the_ I'm going to fuss all day and cry over everything_ look. Oh no, he thought and hugged Harry desperately.

"I'm sorry child." he said quietly, pondering his options.

"Can we read the book?" Harry sniffed, cleaning his face with Daddy's black shirt. Daddy cringed but gave up, he grabbed Harry's hand and went to retrieve the book from his library.

Harry was brightened immediately, Daddy was the best! He thought happily and ran into his room. While he was normally distracted by his toys every other day, today he just went straight to his small library in the corner and picked up the book. He couldn't wait for Daddy to read it again!
Daddy came in after him, his face stoic and his body stiff with resignation.

"I got it Daddy." Harry pushed the book in his hands and dragged him to the armchair near the fireplace. Severus, heaved a loud sigh and picked Harry up, settling the both of them on the chair, with Harry curled up on his legs, and his head leaning against Severus's chest, with the book in front of them.
The potion master read the story. Twice. Harry wanted to do another round, but frankly, Severus was getting sick of it. He closed the book and shooed Harry off his lap.

"Let's get you dressed." he told his son, and quickly ushered him to his room.

"Where are we going Daddy?" Harry skipped next to him, the darn book clutched to his chest. Severus groaned inwardly and went through Harry's wardrobe.

"Do you fancy a play date with auntie Charity?" Harry yelled in approval.

"May I wear the one with baby lion?" Harry peaked over his shoulder, using Severus's shoulder as the leverage.

"The lion one?" that was strange. Harry had never shown any interest in that one, it was actually a gift from one of Snape's clients.

Harry nodded solemnly, adamant with his decision. "Topi likes lions." Severus rolled his eyes and pulled out the shirt. Of course he did. He sneered. Topi that stupid snake! He cursed.

He would have to get Harry out of the house and get rid of that thing. Or better yet, send it off with Harry, as clumsy as the child was the chances were high that the book wouldn't survive a play date.

Smirking Severus quickly dressed Harry in his shirt and trousers, they had to dawdle for the socks since Harry insisted to do it himself. After losing an argument with Harry concerning his mismatched socks, Severus decided that he couldn't get out of the house fast enough as soon as Harry started to sing the story again. He hoisted the boy up on his shoulder and ran out of the door, furiously counting to twenty before starting again as his son sang right next to his ear. Squealing in delight as he was bounced up and down as they climbed up the stairs.

Severus fisted his hand and knocked on the door firmly. She started this mess, and she would fix it. Severus gazed back at his son trying to read the book upside down. At least until he finished grading his essays. He thought and frantically knocked on the door.

"Severus? What are you...? Is that Harry?!" she leaned close and took Harry off his shoulder. Harry hopped in her arms and slanged his arms around her neck.

"Hi!"

She chuckled. "Hey Harry bear. How you doing?"

Severus interrupted the two, glaring at his colleague. This was all her fault! He thought, growling.

"I need you to look after him for a while. I have work to do."

Charity frowned, and took notice of his disheveled expression, and the book in Harry's hands. She smiled sweetly.

"Sure Severus. No problem."

"I hate you." he mouthed and whirled around, his cloak flying around him like a cape. Charity just laughed and bounced Harry in her arms.

"You did it kiddo. Didn't you?" she asked slyly, closing the door behind them.

Harry smiled, offering her the book.

"It was his fault auntie. He didn't let me paint on the papers." Charity rolled her eyes and carried him to the kitchen.

"You little bugger, I had no idea you could be a sly little snake like your Daddy. Tell me, what gave me away?" Harry giggled, and picked up a cookie.

"Daddy tried to wee wee the book, but it was back in my room later." Harry giggled madly and Charity laughed.

"He did?" Harry nodded seriously, munching on another chocolate chips cookie.

"He thought I was sleep. And I had to eat icky veggies last night." he screwed his face in a grimace.

"Don't worry kiddo, you can have those cookies and ice cream on one condition?" Harry perched up on his seat, his eyes as big as saucers.

"Let's annoy Daddy even more alright? I have a plan."

Beneath them, in the dungeons, Severus Snape knocked himself out with another vial of dreamless potion, his unmarked stack of essays still on his desk.
Ding Dong, Ding Dong, the Witch was indeed gone.
The End.
Chapter End Notes:
yeah... probably should warn you that there are other stories on the way too. like music is magic and another one named tulip garden, but i don't think i get to update them both on time for spring fest. i think you're all like 'thank god! somebody contain her! '
rate and review ;)

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