Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Author's Chapter Notes:
Happy 2023! I hope you are well and that the holidays went as good as possible. Mine were sad and stressful but also beautiful in their own way...

This chapter was a bit difficult to write because, apart from the subject at matter, I wanted to do justice to a moment that I know has been on the horizon for far too long... Anyway, I hope you like it and that it was worth the wait :)
Saying goodbye
Fred's smile was not the frozen, stiff one that had remained on his corpse when he had died, but a sincere, natural one that caught Harry's heart and squeezed it so hard that the boy thought for an instant that he was going to collapse in the middle of the Burrow's living room. Luckily, he didn't, and he was able to look more closely at his friend. Fred looked the same: his red hair, the mischievous gleam in his eyes and the hands in his trousers' pockets were the same as always. But upon closer inspection, he noticed subtle differences from the Fred of his memories. His hair was lusher and shinier than it used to be, his teeth whiter, and his face was clean, devoid of cuts or stains. But if there was one thing that indicated that this Fred was not the same as he had always been, it was his skin. If one focused, one could almost see through it, as if the boy was made of transparent material. Or light, Harry thought somewhere in the back of his mind.

It had been two seconds since Fred had appeared in the middle of the room and no one had moved yet. Disbelief and excitement had paralyzed the Weasleys. Harry took a tentative step forward and that seemed to wake the others, because they all stood up suddenly, dropping the notebooks they were holding and rushing at Fred.

"Fred!"

"Oh, Fred..."

"Sweetheart!"

"My boy!"

The words piled up and tangled with one another as the Weasleys engulfed Fred in their arms, hiding him from Harry's sight. The boy hesitated, unsure whether to join them or not. He saw out of the corner of his eye that Hermione also stood some distance away. The girl felt his gaze and smiled at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. Before Harry could do anything, two arms came out of the human pile and dragged him and Hermione towards the others.

Inside, it was even more confusing: he could hear crying and whispered words, feel breathing against his back and someone sobbing next to his chest. In the midst of it all, Harry was transported back to a day when he was seven years old at the Dursleys' house. His aunt had been watching a documentary on television about something called 'Castells'. Apparently, it was a tradition in some parts of Spain, where people, with the force of their arms and the group's strength created human towers. At the bottom were the largest number of people, forming a pile that helped support the people who would eventually climb up and create the castles. Harry had found it impressive and beautiful. A demonstration of strength, bravery, and brotherhood. However, his aunt had snorted, called them idiots, and changed the channel. But Harry had been moved by the image and it had stayed in his mind for a long time. When the human tower had finally fallen, the bodies of those below had cushioned the blow, supporting, and protecting the others, and Harry had wondered if at some point in his life he would ever feel that bond, that connection with other people. If he would trust someone enough to know that they would bear his weight and, should he fall, be there to protect him with their own body. He had never thought that could be true, and over time he had discarded the idea. Then he'd gone to Hogwarts, met Ron and Hermione, the other Weasleys. And, without planning it, without looking for it, he had found those people he had longed for so long. His tower wasn't complete, of course. There were members missing: Sirius, Remus, Tonks, even Dumbledore. But, feeling the Weasleys' arms around him, hearing their heartbeats, Harry realized he could survive it.

Minutes passed and they stood there, holding each other, unwilling to let go. Fearing that, if they did, Fred would leave. This time for good. But, little by little, their lungs began to beg for oxygen and their faces needed to be wiped of tears. And so, they pulled away somewhat, though they continued to hold each other.

Fred was in the center, with everyone's eyes fixed on him. Molly was on his right, holding his hand so tightly that her knuckles were white. She watched him avidly, trying to remember every detail, before the boy disappeared again, her gaze roaming over every inch of that face she had helped create.

"My sweet boy." She said, her voice breaking. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I should have protected you. I should have done so much more, I-"

Fred shook his head and gave her hand a squeeze, smiling sadly at her. He exuded a surprising wisdom for his young age.

"Mum. Don't say that. It wasn't your fault." He insisted, looking into her eyes. "There's nothing you could have done."

"But..."

"It was a war. In wars people die. That's how it is... And if you'd been there with me maybe you would have died too. No." He shook his head, very serious. "What had to happen, happened. And as much as it makes me angry to know that I'm going to miss out on a lot of things I wanted to experience... There's nothing I can do about it. What has happened can't be changed. And feeling guilty or beating yourself up about it isn't going to get you anywhere. It's only going to hurt you more."

Harry looked away from Fred for the first time since the boy had appeared. He too felt guilty and responsible for his death. Despite the boy's words, he couldn't escape his own thoughts that reminded him over and over again that, had he not gone to Hogwarts, the Battle wouldn't have happened, and Fred would still be alive.

"And that goes for everyone else, too." The boy continued. "I know you all perfectly well and I know that each one of you is taking responsibility for my death. As if you were the ones who cast the curse." Fred rolled his eyes. "No way, do you hear me? Percy, you were standing right next to me. And I bet you've wondered a thousand times why me and not you, haven't you?"

Percy avoided looking him in the eye, but tears began to fall down his cheeks, answering the question.

"I knew it." Fred said. "And do you think we would have all been happy and content if that had been the case? If you had died instead of me? No. Of course not. We would have been devastated. Just like you are now. It wouldn't have made any difference at all. Because in wars. Or in life, for that matter... People die. You lose loved ones without warning. And there's nothing you can do about it. Wanting to change the choices you made or thinking you could have done something different only leads to madness. The only real option we all have in this life is to decide what we want to do with it every day. And I am happy with my choices. Even if it ended like this. I wouldn't change them." He assured earnestly. "Because even though I knew what I was risking when I decided to come to Hogwarts to fight, I also knew it was worth it."

There was a silence in the room, as everyone pondered the boy's words. They couldn't believe them or take them in at the moment, but, in time, they would remember, and it would help them on their way to getting better.

After a few seconds, Harry could hear a rhythmic noise coming from his left. Turning around, he saw George clapping slowly and with a small smile on his lips. His face was streaked with dried tears, but the humor on his features was real, and it puzzled Harry for a few moments. It had been weeks, since the Battle in fact, since he had seen such emotion on George's face.

"Well, well, Fred, who knew death would make you so wise? For once you're smarter than me... How does it feel?"

His twin brother let out a laugh, drowning out the reproach Molly had begun to formulate.

"Actually, I could ask you the same question, how does it feel to know that you're now the better-looking twin? Surely, you're glad you don't have to compete against this anymore, eh?" He pointed up and down at himself with his hand, as Mrs. Weasley alternated indignant looks between the two of them.

"But... How dare you! Do you two think it's normal to joke about...?!"

But she was silenced as he saw George move even closer to Fred and then embrace him with such force that for a moment, they looked like one person. As if their bodies had merged together. They had both started laughing and crying at the same time. Tears streamed down their cheeks towards the floor and laughter echoed through the room. But there was a strange peace on their faces, and no one wanted to say anything or intervene. This moment belonged to them alone.

The anger in Mrs. Weasley face turned into silent tears in a second, and she stared at them with her heart in her throat. Arthur reached for his wife's hand and squeezed. He was crying too, feeling that this moment was the last of the old normality, and that from then on, he would have to learn to live without a piece of his family. But for a few precious seconds, everything was in place. All the Weasleys in the same room, together, while the twins laughed about their latest joke.

Inevitably, the minutes passed, and the moment went with them. The two brothers separated and looked at each other with emotion in their eyes.

"I'm going to miss you." George told him, the humor fading from his face.

Fred nodded.

"I'm going to miss you too. But remember what I said. All of you." He turned to look at the others. "What happened is not your fault. I want you to remember it. Always."

The entire family nodded, and though there was still a long way to go, it seemed they were beginning to understand those words.

"And that goes for you too, eh, Harry?"

The boy looked up and met Fred's brown eyes.

"Yeah... I know. I do, really."

"I know you do. But it's another thing to accept it. It'll take time, but I'm sure you will." He put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. His skin was colder than usual. "Thank you for giving me the opportunity to do this, by the way. It's a gift not many people get."

Harry swallowed, moved, and relieved to see that he'd made the right decision.

"I wish I could give you a lot more time with them. I'm sorry, Fred..."

He gave him a quick sad smile and then wrapped him in a tight hug.

"It's a lot more than we'd have if it wasn't for you. Thank you." He repeated. "By the way, you were very brave to decide to come back. To not take that train yet." He whispered those words in his ear, making Harry's heart skip a beat. Only Dumbledore had been there. "I know the road ahead won't be easy, and there will be times when you might regret your decision. But I promise you it will be worth it to stay here."

Harry didn't know what to say to that, though he doubted the words would come out, so he just nodded against Fred's shoulder.

"They need you. And you need them." Continued the boy quietly. "Take care of each other, okay?"

"I promise." Harry swore solemnly.

Fred nodded and, after giving him one last smile, took a step back.

"Good. Now... From what I understand you had a lot of things to tell me, didn't you?" He pointed his finger at the floor, where all the notebooks were lying on top of each other. "I suppose we should get on with it if you don't want to be here for the next hundred years." He said it with humor, but it was clear that the idea would have pleased everyone present.

To avoid giving in to that temptation, Ron decided to go first. He picked up his notebook, as they all sat down on the sofas, and then began to speak. He talked about his regrets, the things he felt sorry for, the good memories and the bad ones too, how much it hurt him to have to say goodbye, how scared he was at the thought of the future without him. He told Fred that he forgave him for every fight and joke taken too far, and that he hoped he could forgive him for his mistakes too. He assured him that together they would survive his loss. And finally, sniffling and with tears streaming down his cheeks, he hugged him, telling him how much he loved him and how much he would be missed. When he finished talking, there was not a dry eye in the room. Everyone was crying, thinking about what they would say to Fred when it was their turn, to avoid focusing on what would come after that.

Harry wiped his tears with the back of his hand and watched as Ginny picked up her own notebook and began to speak. The boy reached a hand into his pocket, picking up the Stone again. He was aware that they had gone over the half hour mark, but watching Ginny hug her brother and tell him in sobs everything she had been thinking for weeks, Harry found himself unable to intervene. The other Weasleys deserved and needed their time to say goodbye too, it would have been unfair to forbid them to do so. And that was why Harry waited patiently until each member of the family, notebook in hand, had finished talking to Fred.

Many things came out along the way: past fights, good times and bad, guilt over what had happened during the Battle, sadness over what had been lost, anger at such injustice, anguish over the future, fear at the thought of being without Fred for the rest of their lives. But, above all, love. Lots of love. So much that, even mixed with the pain, anger, and desolation, it filled every inch of the room, comforting Harry's heart with its bittersweet presence. The boy looked over and what he saw stunned him. Fred was hugging his parents while Mr. Weasley stroked his hair and Molly clasped his cheek. That image stirred something in Harry, a deep sadness, yes, but also a comforting one. He realized that for generations, for as long as the world had existed and humans had lived in it, people had lost loved ones. Fathers and mothers, sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, friends, partners... All had buried people important to them. And they had survived it. This horrible pain was not his alone. Millions of people shared it with him. They knew what it felt like to be in his situation. Or would one day. And as sad or catastrophic as it might seem, there was beauty in it. It was comforting to know that he was not alone. That, at that moment, thousands of people across the planet were mourning the loss of someone and feeling their absence. And it would be like that for millennia to come. That certainty moved and consoled him.

With those thoughts, he looked at Fred once more and took the Stone between his fingers. The boy noticed his gaze, as he raised his eyes to meet his, and nodded slightly, indicating that he was ready.

"Dad, Mum...I think it's time."

"W-what?" Molly looked at Fred and then at Harry and understood. "No. No! I'm not ready. Not yet. Stay a little longer. Fred, please." Her voice broke and she looked around, searching for support among her children. She needed to see that someone, anyone, felt just as lost as she did. Just as scared. She would never be ready for what was about to happen.

The other Weasleys looked at her with fear and sadness on their faces, mirroring her own feelings. None of them wanted to say goodbye. But they remembered well Harry's warnings about the Stone.

"Mum." Fred took her hand in his. "Listen to me. You're going to be okay. I know it's hard to believe right now. But you are going to be. Yes. Look at me. Yes." He repeated as he saw her shake her head. "Listen to me, everybody. I know this sucks. I know it's unfair and none of us want it. But it happened. And nothing can change it. And now you have a whole life to live. And I don't want you to waste it." He said very seriously, looking them all in the eye. "I'm not going to lie to you. It's not going to be easy. You're going to go through some very bad weeks, months or even years. And it's not going to be linear. There will be good days and bad days. It's going to take a hell of a lot to get you back on your feet. I know that. And I'm sorry. I wish you didn't have to go through this. But I promise you..." Fred's voice broke, but he kept talking; it was very important what he had to say. "I promise you that you're going to get better, and you will be okay. You will have a good life. You will be happy."

"But... But how can we be okay without you?" Asked Ginny in a shaky voice. "How can we be happy if you're not here?"

Fred smiled sadly at her.

"That, I can't answer, I'm afraid. The answer will be different for everyone. You'll have to find your purpose. What moves you forward. I can only tell you to support and take care of each other. That the people we love make life worth living. Even if every now and then it all gets shaky when we lose one of them."

Ginny nodded and tried to keep her composure bravely. But she wasn't able to, and tears welled up in her eyes, as sobs ran through her. She let herself fall against Fred, hugging him once more, closing her eyes so she could remember every little detail of that moment in the future. Her brother held her tightly and whispered soothing words in her ear. After a few seconds, Ginny took a deep breath and stepped back.

"You're going to be fine." Fred said again, looking at them one by one. "And, whenever you need it, whenever you want it, I'll be there with you. I promise you that. You will take me with you wherever you go and, when you do something that makes you happy, I will be there to share that happiness."

After those words, Harry, who had been trying not to cry, could feel the moisture leaving his eyes. He had wanted to be strong for the Weasleys. He knew he had to keep a clear head to resist the temptation of the Stone, but he was finding it very difficult. He looked around at the others and saw that they were all crying as well, and had gone over to Fred to hug him one more time, one last time.

"Harry." The boy called to him. "Come here too."

His feet felt like they were made of cement, weighing him down and moving clumsily, as Harry trudged the few steps that separated him from Fred and the other Weasleys. When he finally reached them, arms engulfed him again and Harry knew that, when he emerged from that embrace, Fred Weasley would no longer be in the room.

"I'm sorry." He said, unable to contain himself, blinking through tears.

"Don't be sorry. As I said before, you've given us a gift. So, thank you, from the bottom of my heart." He could hear the smile in Fred's voice, somewhere over his shoulder. He could hear the tremor in it, too. "And thank you, Mum and Dad. Thank you, Charlie, Bill, Percy." Fred listed their names, one by one and clearly. "...George, Ron, Ginny, Harry and Hermione. For giving me the best family anyone could ever wish for."

"Fred..." George murmured. "Thanks to you."

Harry could tell Fred was nodding.

"Remember what we talked about, okay? And look after each other. Love each other. That's the most important thing."

"We will. I promise." Ron said softly, as Harry took the Stone between his fingers and began to turn it.

"I love you so much..." Fred's voice sounded distant.

"And we love you." Mrs. Weasley whispered, though this time there was no response to her words.

Harry dropped the Stone back into his pocket and realized that, despite still being inside that embrace, there was more space. One person was missing from it. He bowed his head, exhausted and heartbroken.

Realizing what had happened, the others moved a few inches apart, and then reality hit them.

Bill and Charlie both turned away from the others at the same time. The former left the room without a word, while the latter sat down on a sofa, burying his head in his hands. Percy also separated from the others and then leaned his back against the wall, slowly lowering himself to sit on the floor. For his part, Ron had moved closer to Hermione, seeking her support, and she had wrapped an arm around him, offering a handkerchief with the other one. George had hardly moved, staring at the spot where Fred had been moments before, tears streaming down his cheeks.

But it was Mr. and Mrs. Weasley that Harry was most worried about. They were hugging each other so tightly that he couldn't see their faces. Suddenly, they broke apart and Molly turned in his direction, her face broken and distorted. Harry took an instinctive step backwards, watching as the woman came towards him in a couple of strides. For an instant he feared that she was going to slap him, that she was going to shout at him, that she was going to try to force him to call Fred again. But Mrs. Weasley bridged the distance between them and wrapped him in a hug that took his breath away. For a moment he was fourteen again and it was his fourth year at Hogwarts, the day Voldemort had returned, and Cedric had been killed. Molly had hugged him like that, then. Like a mother. She had comforted him. And after blinking in surprise, Harry realized that this hug was similar, but also different. Because Mrs. Weasley wanted to comfort him and at the same time needed to be comforted by him. Harry returned the gesture, trying to show her how much she meant to him.

"Thank you, Harry. Thank you." The woman murmured between shaky breaths. "It was a gift. As F-Fred said. It was a gift..."

The weight that had been piled up on the boy's shoulders, his guilt, his fear at having traumatized them further; it melted away, and Harry cried tears of relief. They kept hugging each other and stayed like that for a long time, until someone touched the boy's shoulder. Harry turned and saw that it was Mr. Weasley.

"Here." He said, helping to separate them and sit Molly on the nearest sofa. He then placed another cup of tea in Harry's hand and leaned over to do the same for Mrs. Weasley. "Bill's made them, dear. Drink up, it'll help."

Harry did as Molly was doing and took a sip. As he did so, he realized it wasn't normal tea.

"It's a calming herbal tea." Arthur explained. "I think we all needed one. We also have potions in the kitchen cupboard if anyone needs something stronger." He added in a louder voice. Harry thanked him with a nod, but just drank from his cup.

He then glanced around and saw that all the Weasleys had a drink like his in their hands. He shared a glance with Ginny and Ron. They both smiled sadly at him, but that comforted him. They seemed a little more themselves than they had a few minutes ago.

"Harry..." Mr. Weasley cleared his throat. "I wanted to thank you too for what you've done. It hasn't been easy. No doubt. But I'm sure it's helped us all. Even if it hurts now... I think it's given us a little more peace of mind, in a sense. It'll help us heal the wound."

The boy nodded, grateful for those words as well, as Arthur returned to Molly and sat down beside her. A few minutes passed in silence, as they all drank their infusions and recovered a little from their emotions. Harry turned his wrist to check the time, curious. He wasn't surprised to see that it was well into the early hours of the morning; it had been a long day.

"I think there's enough room for two people."

Harry looked up to see Bill and Charlie waving their wands and staring at what appeared to be a bed. It had appeared in the middle of the room, taking the place of one of the sofas.

"Charlie?" Arthur asked his son.

"We thought it would be a good idea to transfigure the sofas into double beds for everyone. At least for tonight. I don't think anyone feels like sleeping alone, do we?"

Arthur looked at his sons with affection evident on his features.

"Good thinking, boys. I think it's an excellent idea."

The next fifteen minutes were spent transfiguring the beds they would be sleeping in that night. And when they were ready, Harry realized just how tired he was and how much he wanted to just lay down on them. He had to muster all his strength to get into his pajamas and not fall asleep standing up while he brushed his teeth in the bathroom next to the living room.

When he returned, he saw that all the Weasleys and Hermione were already in their pajamas, ready for bed. They had closed the curtains and dimmed the lights, but Harry was still able to see around him. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were lying down in a double bed a little further away from the others, while Percy and George, who had his eyes closed, apparently asleep, were sharing the one closest to them. Next came the bed of Bill and Charlie, and after that, the one of Ginny and Hermione. The girls' bed was right next to Harry and Ron's and, as he passed by them, Ginny looked at him affectionately, causing Harry's exhausted heart to flutter, showing signs of life.

"Good night, kids." Mr. Weasley said, placing his head on his pillow. "Tomorrow will be another day, so try to get some rest. I love you all very very much."

His sons returned those words and then the lights dimmed even more, filling the room with a darkness broken only by the moonlight streaming through the closed curtains.

Harry closed his eyes, exhausted. Ron was already snoring beside him, and he was about to fall asleep when he felt something against his arm. In the darkness, he could see that it was Ginny's hand reaching for his. Despite everything that had happened, Harry couldn't help a sleepy smile. He laced his fingers with hers and, before he fell into a deep sleep, he thought that maybe Fred was right. That maybe they would indeed get to be well and happy. Surrounded by his loved ones and feeling Ginny's warmth against his hand, it was easier to believe.
Chapter End Notes:
And this is the end of today's chapter. I hope you liked it or at least it didn't disappoint you :) See you in the next one, where our old Potions Master will appear again ;) Until next time!

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