Taking place directly after the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry is trying to deal with his trauma from the course of the events of the war and struggles to confront it, along with trying to manage his grief. Snape survived but disappeared in shame and remorse after the battle. Harry finds him, and they both discover that they have more in common now more than ever - Both are struggling with their sense of self and purpose. But stray Death Eaters from the battle are re-grouping for a final stand to take out the great Harry Potter, and their traitor, and Harry and Snape must put aside their differences to end the fight once and for all, whilst dealing with Snapes' illness along the way. Explores darker themes of grief, self-blame, PTSD, depression, and suicidal ideation.
|Takes Place: 8 - Post Hogwarts (young adult Harry)
|Snape flavour: Comforting Snape, Depressed Snape, Desperate Snape, Stern Snape
|Categories: Misc > No category on the site fits
||Genres: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, General, Hurt/Comfort, Tragedy
|Tags: Abuse Recovery, Depression Recovery, Injured!Snape
||Word count: 230393
|Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Arthur, Draco, Fred George, Ginny, Hermione, Luna, McGonagall, Molly, Narcissa, Neville, Ron
01 Feb 2023 - Updated:
22 Mar 2023 Updated!
Hello readers! This fic began in 2020, primarily posted on FFnet, then over to AO3. There are tiny changes to canon, mainly derived from the films, however, it is primarily book-based. It was my first fic for many years as I delved back into the fandom once again, so bear with me within the first few chapters as I start to get back into the fic-writing groove. So the first 5-10ish chapters do not reflect my current writing style - I do plan on editing them at some point, but I am currently facing some personal things which prevent me from focusing on that.
This is a completed, novel-length fic that I aim to post sporadically. There is a sequel to this called Light of Mine which is currently a WIP, so if this receives good feedback, I may consider cross-publishing it here. So now I bring this fic to P&S for you to enjoy this wonderful, angsty, heartwarming rollercoaster of a ride!
1. CH 1: Hollow by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (3496 words)
2. CH 2: Holding On by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (2700 words)
3. CH 3: Injured Hearts by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (4019 words)
4. CH 4: Torment by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (3810 words)
Warning: This chapter contains suicidal themes and ideation, so just a heads up.
5. CH 5: In Memoriam by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (5160 words)
6. CH 6: A New Problem by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (4346 words)
Hey guys! Just a head's up - any paragraphs in italics are flashbacks. As mentioned in the first chapter, I have blended scenes from both book and film in this story. I know this might be frustrating for some readers – I'm just flowing with my headcannon LOL. The flashback scene opening this chapter is mainly derived from the book events, although I like to keep a visual from the films. For the sake of copyright and avoiding the repeat of the scenes we already know from the book, I have added a few extra things within it to help enforce this story of mine.
Also – McGonagall to the rescue!
7. CH 7: Lament by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (5315 words)
8. CH 8: The Slow Ascent by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 4] (3687 words)
9. CH 9: Into the Forest Again by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (4751 words)
Well, this one was super fun to write! There are a few sweet moments in here, so I hope you enjoy them! =)
10. CH 10: Back Within the Shadows by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (4628 words)
11. CH 11: Rise Up by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (5228 words)
12. CH 12: With Asphodel by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 4] (5661 words)
Harry and Severus scenes are always heartwarming and a favourite to write!
13. CH 13: Fade In by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (4875 words)
Things get a bit, err...explosive in this Chapter. Sorry ^_^
14. CH 14: Into the Depths by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (4598 words)
Hey guys! Snape POV chapters were never really my initial intention, so I won't be doing them too frequently. I find I will do a Snape POV chapter simply where it fits in the story, especially following certain conflicts/events. I always want to express that although this story is seen mostly from Harry's perspective, I do want to display certain points from Snape's perspective as well, as I find delving into both their minds, not only fascinating but imperative to the flow and intentions of this story. Hopefully by doing these POVs, it will help fill the gap and understand our Potions Master a little better in that mind of his given his new second chance, and his inner moral conflict. In saying that, I am trying my best to keep all of these characters as in-character (IC) as possible given the scenarios present, but please let me know if at all you think a character's decision is not IC enough. Any criticism helps.
15. CH 15: The Way Forward by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 5] (4995 words)
And the path to reconciliation begins. Enjoy xx
16. CH 16: A Call to Arms by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (6296 words)
Note the theme of choice within this chapter, and for the remainder of this story. Choices characters never had before. Brace yourselves for a chaotic chapter, and bear in mind that is has only been a few weeks since Voldemort's downfall.
17. CH 17: Falling Skies by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (6619 words)
Cue the angst!
18. CH 18: The Dark of Night by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (5838 words)
Just a teeny tiny insert from The Princes Tale at the end of this chapter. Enjoy!
19. CH 19: Reaching Out by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (5571 words)
I have a few hectic chapters planned and upcoming, so I'm trying to break them up with slightly mellow chapters like these.
20. CH 20: Seeking Sanctuary by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (6804 words)
Hey guys! This chapter has a bit of a magical info dump. There is a segment below talking about wards and given how little we know of protective enchantments in the Potterverse, and so I've taken the canon info and delved a little further into it, with my own extra spin on it just to give that branch of magic a little more depth.
Also, another nod to a film interpretation is in this chapter. Sorry.
21. CH 21: Memento Vivere by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (5977 words)
Excuse the upcoming dark chapter. Heavy warning of depression and anxiety ahead.
22. CH 22: Exit Wounds by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (6435 words)
Get ready for things to be kicked waaaay up a few notches in the next few chapters!
23. CH 23: Shards of Glass by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (6713 words)
The plot thickens with this fiery chapter!
24. CH 24: The Lunar Dilemma by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (6171 words)
This was one of my favorite chapters to write, as it contains one of my favorite scenes
25. CH 25: Melancholy Reminisce by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (5179 words)
26. CH 26: The Misty Dell by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (6979 words)
Heads up for an upcoming dark, morbid, and spooky chapter ahead (sorry +_+)! The Misty Dell was one of three sites the DEs used, which as an FYI, are actually canon to the Deathly Hallow games only, and never mentioned in the books or films. During my research into Voldemort's reign, it gave me a cool idea to delve further into them and provides a creepy backdrop. There was no more information regarding the camps as they only served the purpose of holding prisoners. So, I took that information and decided to create my own little twisted lore and story about this location. I did not play the games, so the information I know it purely found on research.
On a side note, I do apologise for the references to 'Potter', 'Granger', 'Weasley' in this chapter. This one is written in Severus' POV. There is a good reason he does that.
27. CH 27: Raise the Banner by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (7246 words)
This was a super fun one to write! Enjoy drill seargent Severus ^_^
28. CH 28: A Rocky Pursuit by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 3] (6891 words)
This one was a little nuts to plan. For a visual reference, you are welcome to google Tintern Quarry, as it is a legit place in the Forest of Dean, Gloucestershire, England. It actually closed in 1981 and is used as a rock-climbing location. Coincidentally (maybe?), 1981 was also the end of the First Wizarding War.
29. CH 29: A Hopeful Heart by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (7023 words)
30. CH 30: Second Light by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (7025 words)
Another Severus POV chapter.
31. CH 31: Stepping Stones by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (5859 words)
Just a heads up – This chapter overlaps and taking place simultaneously with the previous Chapter.
32. CH 32: The Risk of Morality by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (6895 words)
Just a warning for an upcoming awkward scene (on Harry's part) at the start of this chapter, reminisce of something we know in Snape's past. There really was no alternative to it, but Harry's thoughts explain everything, vague because I didn't feel it appropriate delving into the details.
33. CH 33: Of Hearts and Minds by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 2] (7163 words)
Our favorite Potion Master's psyche continues to unravel.
34. CH 34: Ode to the Fallen by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (7138 words)
There is a poem spoken below, which I will have referenced in a footnote at the end. It's not mine (I wish!). I did not write its full version, but I have posted the link below should you wish to read it in its entirety. It's rather beautiful.
Also, regarding the last chapter – I love Arthur, and I don't intend to paint him in a bad light. He is a father protective of his children and simply does not trust Severus anymore. But he trusts Harry, hence why he is not telling the authorities he is there. He wouldn't go that far. Part of this story is dealing with such ramifications that no matter what sacrifices Severus made for the Order, he still did bad things (even beyond his control), and some will still see him as a Death Eater. This is just another obstacle that Severus (and even Harry) must navigate through. Because the only living person that knows the entire truth about our Potions Master is Harry.
35. CH 35: Crimson Sky by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (7667 words)
The first phase of the ritual is here! ^_^ Now, I just want to touch upon a few things.
The ritual itself takes some elements of modern-day witchcraft, which I am familiar with, but I want to stress that these rituals are not fully reliant on it. That being said, the incantations spoken below will actually be in Latin, but I will place the English translations within the Footnotes as an FYI. I have researched Latin texts in favor of this story (and boy, it took foreeever +_+), and have approached more expert assistance on the language so I can avoid being completely amateur about it. Not that I'm saying that these are 100% accurate, but, this is to let you know that I spent much time in the research phase (I have seriously about 6 pages on the transference spell already, if that's any indication).
Lastly, yes, this will be a Severus POV chapter. Since Harry is unable to witness it, it just makes sense for the POV to change. But I will delve into Harry's thought process about it in the next chapter because it's rather important also from his POV.
I'm so sorry about what I'm about to put them through **cries**
TRIGGER WARNING: Touches upon physical, emotional, and verbal abuse (not in detail).
36. CH 36: A Time for Healing by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (6712 words)
There are some cool little moments in this one and a funny scene towards the end which I couldn't resist writing. I had to give you guys some kind of reprieve after the previous heavy chapter +_+ Enjoy!
37. CH 37: Wish by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (8591 words)
Things are about to get a little heated within the next few chapters, but there are also some cool upcoming developments. I hope you enjoy!
38. CH 38: Distorted Shadows by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (7873 words)
Okay, I didn't entirely plan for this chapter to be split POV, but it seemed to work best against my original plan. Severus' POV will happen later in this chapter. And also, apologies in advance – a few characters are on edge in this chapter.
39. CH 39: Silver and Gold by SanctuaryAngel [Reviews - 1] (8459 words)
Hope you enjoy this chapter! I had a lot of fun writing this one! ^_^ Things are a little heated, but it will get better, I promise!
To be continued...
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