Atoning The Past by Lupins Mistress
Summary: "...I am not your father. I will not act like your father. I do not care for you, Potter, and I will not be a parent to you..."

...Harry was more than ready to agree with that and nodded as he finished the drink he had been sipping at nervously.

It has been often said that a father and son can overcome anything, that family can overcome anything as long as there is love between them...but what if there isn't love but only hate? In a time of war most rely on their family and friends, but who can Harry rely on when he can't tell his friends that Severus Snape is his father? Especially with how curious they are of his secrets already. It isn't like he has Snape, anyway...to Snape he isn't more than just a burden after all, right? So in his time of need who can Harry turn to? Who can help him as he completes the task that was set on him?
Categories: Parental Snape > Biological Father Snape > Severitus Challenge Main Characters: .Snape and Harry (required), Draco, Dumbledore, Hermione, Remus, Ron
Snape Flavour: None
Genres: Action/Adventure, General, Hurt/Comfort
Media Type: None
Tags: Alternate Universe
Takes Place: 6th summer
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 18 Completed: No Word count: 66764 Read: 66125 Published: 18 Sep 2008 Updated: 13 Aug 2009
First Day Back by Lupins Mistress
Author's Notes:
Happy Holidays, everyone! Hope you have a happy New Year! Enjoy the fic.

September 1, 1996

Hermione Granger followed Ginny and Ron Weasley into an empty compartment.

"Where's Harry, do you reckon?" Ron asked while helping Ginny with her trunk.

Hermione shrugged. "I haven't heard much from him, I was surprised he didn't show up at Diagon Alley that other day, but I guess he's busy with everything. Training, I'm assuming."

Before Ron or Ginny could respond, the compartment door was opened and Draco Malfoy stepped inside already in his robes, with his prefect badge pinned to his chest. His blond hair was in his eyes and he looked almost angelic, except that a smirk was on his lips.

Draco said nothing even though he looked as if he wanted to. Instead he headed to the window looking out at the platform and sat down. Not even Ron could say anything with his surprise. Ginny simply looked at him wide-eyed, while Hermione calmly took her seat and stared thoughtfully at Draco.

Ron frowned but said nothing and pulled Ginny to sit next to him as for from Draco as possible. He glared at the blond.

"So," Ginny said as if to break the ice, "Is this how the prefect compartment always is? Percy almost made it feel as if we were missing something great."

No one answered her. Ron was still glaring at Draco, and Hermione was now looking out of the compartment door as if willing someone to enter and break the awkwardness.

"Where is Harry?" Ron asked suddenly. "Everyone is on the train practically and there is only"—he looked at his worn old watch—"ten minutes for him to get here."

Hermione looked at Ron. She frowned. "He could be on the train, maybe."

Ron shook his head. "He would have seen us, or we would have seen him."

Ginny sighed. "He is okay, right guys?"

"Lupin said so, but he left so abruptly, just completely out of the blue," Ron said slumping his shoulder.

Ernie McMillan chose that moment to enter the compartment, as he did Draco looked up. Ernie greeted them all and sat down. Hannah Abbot followed him as well as a couple from Ravenclaw, Colin Creevey, Pansy Parkinson, and two other Slytherins.

Draco merely nodded at all of them, once, stiffly, not once meeting any of their eyes before he once more stared out the window.

"Draco!" Pansy cried as she took a seat next to him and reached for his hand.

Draco didn't pull his hand away, but the hand clasped to his made no difference to his expression.

The prefects' meeting lasted a little over an hour, and then they were all heading to different compartments to hang out with friends. Draco, Hermione noted attempted to remain behind but was pulled out by Pansy who was babbling to him about something.

Ron and Hermione went to the compartment that Neville and Luna had wound up sitting in, with Ginny following them. Once they had settled themselves, the subject of Harry once more come up.

"Did he ever owl an explanation for not coming to Diagon Alley?" Neville asked.

"No," Ron said. "And he isn't on the train."

"He's just busy," Hermione said. "For all we know he's already at Hogwarts training or something."

Ron nodded and said nothing else on the matter.

"What was up with Malfoy today?" Ginny asked suddenly. "He looked depressed, maybe a little quieter, different from last year, anyway."

Ron shrugged.

Hermione bit her lip. "He grew up," She muttered to them. "The war, maybe it's changed him."

Ron looked as if he wanted to argue, but Neville spoke first, "What happened? Did Malfoy say something?"

Ginny shook her head. "No, it's that he said nothing."

-

-

-

Harry was running. He was late. He hadn't exactly meant to get caught up, but he had just figured out why his potion had reacted the way it had and then he had wanted to research something else. He knew, now, how Hermione felt. He had never expected that he would, but he needed to get to the Great Hall before the first years were led in to get sorted. He'd promised Snape that he wouldn't be late and he would make sure that he checked the time, which made his being late even worse.

Harry came to a stop. Professor McGonagall was walking into the Great Hall and the first years were walking behind her in awe of the castle. Harry threw himself behind a suit of armor. A couple of the first years, two girls that to Harry looked miniscule giggled and looked at him. Harry gave them a wave, followed by a wink and then touched his lips with his fingers. They giggled even more, but followed the other first years.

Harry quickly, sneakily ran after them and while most people were looking at the first years, made his way to the Gryffindor table. He took a seat near the middle of the table, startling Hermione and Ron when he slipped into the empty seat between them. Before he could turn to his shocked best friends, however, he looked up at the staff table. He grinned when Remus gave him a small smile and wink. Dumbledore looked amused down the table from Remus, while Snape looked as strict as ever, and as if he felt Harry needed some punishment for his crime. McGonagall pursed her lips at him but Harry could see it wasn't because she disapproved but that she was fighting a smile.

"Where were you?" Hermione asked next to him. "We were so worried. You weren't on the train and then you weren't in here either, we thought maybe you might not be coming to Hogwarts at all this year."

Harry shrugged, but didn't answer, because the hat had stopped singing and the sorting had begun. Harry found himself seeking out the two first years that had spotted him, out in the crowd.

"Ah, there they are," He said to himself in a small whisper.

"Who?" Ron asked, though he didn't, Harry noticed, pay attention to see if he would answer and instead looked longingly at his empty plate.

"No one," Harry said more for the benefit of Hermione who had a questioning look on her face. "Just some first years that saw me earlier."

"We were not that short when we were first years," Ron told them a moment later as one of the smaller first years, a boy with curly light brown hair ran up to the stool and scrambled onto it before allowing the hat to cover half his face when he slipped it on.

The hat took a long moment to decide on his house and then called, "Ravenclaw!"

"No, really, we weren't that short," Ron said while the Ravenclaw table burst into cheers for their new member.

Hermione rolled her eyes. Harry said nothing but just continued watching the sorting, waiting for one of the two girls to be called, however, he couldn’t help but disagree with Ron. He had been that small when he had arrived at Hogwarts, he'd been a scrawny, diminutive eleven year old.

Harry did not catch her name, but noticed when the blond first year he had seen earlier ran up to the stool and sat down, pulling the hat over her head covering her blue eyes.

"Gryffindor!" The hat shouted and Harry clapped with the rest as she made her way to the table at a brisk pace, looking for an empty seat, consequently the seat across from Harry was empty, and she slipped into it, between Lavender Brown, and Dean Thomas.

"Hi," she said nervously around the table.

Lavender gave her a small smile but turned quickly back to Parvati. Dean barely nodded at her and continued looking at whatever magazine he and Seamus had under the table. Hermione gave the first year a welcoming smile, and Ron chose to completely not even notice her. He was still glaring at his empty plate.

Harry was the only one to greet her verbally with a hello.

The sorting continued on until the other girl he had seen earlier was up. She was a deep contrast to the other, with her dark hair.

"Slytherin!" The hat shouted within a few seconds if it being on her head and she walked slowly to the table that Harry had not yet given a glance at yet.

When Harry turned to look at it, he found Draco Malfoy staring at him in a confused manner.

The sorting was finished a moment later and then Dumbledore was standing. He smiled at them and then said a number of odd words before the feast was upon them.

"So, where were you?" Hermione asked again.

Harry bit into his chicken and took a minute to swallow. "I'll tell you later," He said. "Too many people."

Hermione gave him a dubious look, but didn't press the matter. Ron was ignoring both of them and stuffing his mouth with food. Across from him, Lavender was giving him flirtatious looks but Ron either was ignoring them or did not notice them; Harry would bet his left arm that Ron hadn't noticed them.

"You're Harry Potter, right?"

Harry looked across the table to the first year. "Yes," he answered.

"It's just I didn't know if you were. I mean, I've heard about you, of course, who hasn't? But I've never seen a picture of you and you're so normal, nothing like I expected you to act." She blushed.

Ron snickered.

-

-

-

September 2, 1996

Harry's first day of classes was memorable. It began well enough. He was the first one awake in his dorm room, and could still hear the snoring coming from Ron's bed as he grabbed his Hogwarts uniform and dressed quickly, before he grabbed the potions book he had been reading the night before while working on the potion that had waylaid him.

He hadn’t gotten a chance to tell Hermione and Ron his cover story yet as to where he had been. Snape had been the one to save him from telling them anything, informing him as he was leaving the great hall. Harry could chuckle at the memory of the night before.

Harry was walking out of the great hall next to Hermione who was calling for the first years to follow her, but he hadn't even gotten to the door before he was stopped by Snape.

"Mr. Potter," Snape had drawled. "It is interesting how much like your insufferable father you are, breaking the rules on the first night back. I'm surprised even you could beat his record of fastest detention gotten within the halls of Hogwarts. In fact, you will serve it tonight, come along."

Ron had given Harry a stricken look, and Hermione had looked as if she wanted to argue, and while Harry had put up a front of the annoyed unfairly treated teenager he had said nothing and instead simply followed Snape.

Harry walked down into the common room and wasn't completely surprised to find Hermione already sitting in one of the most comfortable chairs in the common room a book open on her lap.

"Harry!" She said when she saw him, and quickly closed her book. "What are you doing up so early. I would have thought you would sleep in. What time did you get in last night, Ron and I waited but it was getting late and I mean today is our first day, we would have waited."

"No, it's alright. I got in somewhat late," Harry said. "It's part of the whole thing with last night, the reason I was late. I figured Snape would be mad."

Hermione perked up at mention of the night before. "Where were you? You weren't on the train and all and then you were late to dinner."

Harry sighed. "I was brewing a potion."

Hermione gave him a doubtful look.

"No, really, I was. The reason why I didn't tell you earlier is that no student should be allowed to stay at Hogwarts unless they're related to one of the staff, and it would be like especial preference, but really I only got here a day earlier than all of you. I've been training in everything really and I started on this one potion and I got caught up. They're really interesting potions, and I need to get a hang of them or Snape won't let me stay in the class. Anyhow, I was working on one of them, Snape told me he would let me as long as I made it to dinner on time, hence the detention."

Hermione frowned. Harry knew she had found something wrong with everything. "Then why did you stay with him so long?"

"Oh, right. Well, after continuing on with the potion, because Snape felt it was just the thing I needed to do, and exploding the cauldron, I got this burn on my arm, so I had to go to Madame Pomfrey, and she wouldn't let me leave until then."

It wasn't a complete lie. He had gotten burnt, and he had gone to the infirmary, but only because Snape had given her the last of his burn salve. But afterwards they had gone back to Snape's lab and had discussed his potion as well as the dangers of not paying attention to the time, as well as reacting ingredients.

Hermione didn't look like she liked the explanation but she let it go, as if she realized she was not going to get a straight answer and she would get one eventually depending on how much she pushed.

"Then where were you this summer?"

"Can't tell you, I'm not the secret keeper," Harry said. "We were at a safe house."

"Who was training you?"

Harry shrugged. "Really can't mention that one," He said and then looked at his book. He had hoped to be able to get some reading done, but it seemed that, that wasn't going to be the case.

Hermione who had decided to stop asking questions, said instead, "Should we head down to the great hall? No use in waiting for Ron, is there?"

"It's a little early, Hermione," Harry protested, "And Ron will probably want to head down with us too."

Hermione looked a little put out.

When Harry asked her what was wrong she said, "I just want to look at my new schedule, and prepare for the classes. I mean I know what I want to take and everything, and I have some idea how everything will fit, but what if I can't take something I have to fix my entire studying schedule and it took a week to prepare."

Harry laughed. "Fine, come on," Harry said. "We might as well go. I already know my schedule. McGonagall gave it to me yesterday, mostly because Snape, Remus, Dumbledore and I had to discuss it and how things are all fitting in. Snape didn't want to let me take Potions. I got an E on the OWL but he only takes O students, but Dumbledore convinced him that part of that was his fault. And then Remus convinced me that I shouldn't take Care of Magical Creatures, and he offered me an apprenticeship, which I am doing, by the way. So we had to fix everything. "

Hermione looked at him open mouthed. "So what are you taking?" She asked.

"Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, Herbology, and Defense, but really spread throughout the week I have tons of time to help Remus and work on my potions."

Hermione said nothing but instead continued down to the great hall in silence.

-

-

-

Their first class begun just like any other charms class, with Professor Flitwick greeting all his students back with excitement but issuing his rules for his classroom that shouldn't have been forgotten. And then he had demonstrated what they were going to begin working on in the next few days after doing the entire theory behind the subject. Harry was glad about that part, all things considered he couldn't do his usual magic just yet, though it had gotten much stronger than before and he was able to do basic versions of all the spells he had learnt so far. Snape had told him that it would just take a little more time, but Harry was truly just getting frustrated with the entire thing.

The next period, while Hermione went off to Ancient Runes, and Ron to Care of Magical Creatures, Harry headed to the third floor to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. When he arrived every seat was filled, all with first years. Gryffindors and Slytherins. Remus was not within the classroom but his office and Harry quickly ducked into it as well.

"Hello, Harry," Remus said. "Is this your free period?"

Harry nodded.

"Great. First year Gryffindors and Slytherins. I don't know what Dumbledore was thinking."

Harry laughed. "I think he is attempting more promotion at house unity, but it hasn't exactly worked ever. I'm assuming he's starting much earlier than usual."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Well come on, today, you're observing and learning names. Maybe you'd like to take roll. I need to write up a small note to Minerva about a certain third year Gryffindor."

"Alright," Harry said and began calling roll.

-

-

-

Harry entered the great hall alone after his first free period with Remus. He was grinning. It had gone great, granted they hadn't really done much but introduce themselves. The first years had gone nuts when they heard his name, even though, Harry thought, they should really have known who he was the moment he stepped into the room, not that he wanted to sound conceited.

"Hey, Harry," Imogen Copperfield—Imy for short—said, when Harry sat down. He had finally learned her name the night before during dinner and thought of her almost like a little sister, even though he had met her only the night before, but there was something to be said about the innocence of the young, she was full of it.

"How's your first day so far?" Harry asked, while piling his plate full of food.

"Great. It's a little strange with all the things in the castle, cool really. I've been late to two classes already. I couldn't find the stairs and no one would help me."

Harry laughed. "Ron and I got to Transfiguration late on our first day, and we thought we were so lucky, McGonagall wasn't there. I hadn't seen her transform into a cat before then, and suddenly she jumped at us and turned into herself. We were so scared."

Imy laughed.

Harry grinned at her and turned to his food just as Ron, followed by Hermione entered the Great Hall and spotted him.

"Hello, munchkin," Ron said to Imy, patting her on the head.

She scrunched up her nose and gave him a half-hearted glare. Ron laughed and began to grab anything within his vicinity. Hermione rolled her eyes.

"How was it with Remus?" She instead asked Harry, and began to put a modest pile of food onto her own plate.

"Fine. Fun, actually. We just got introductions done today. It will be interesting to help teach."

"I wonder," Hermione said. "Won't you consider teaching? Being a professor? I mean, you were brilliant last year with the DA, and now with Remus helping him teach, wouldn't it be better than becoming an auror?"

She had a point, but becoming an auror had been a dream of his since his fourth year, he had been fascinated by the job the moment he heard of it, and it wasn't like he didn't do that already. He was almost perfect for the job. He said nothing to Hermione, and instead continued eating his food.

"What do we have next?" Ron asked once he had finished stuffing his mouth with food.

Hermione didn't bother pulling out her schedule, but instead answered readily, "Double Potions, and then a free period."

"I'm not taking potions this year," Ron said. He sighed and reached into his pocket, bringing out his schedule. "I have a free period, then another free period. Want to go out to the quidditch pitch, we have all that time, and soon we'll have tons of homework."

"I have potions, Ron," Harry said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Ron sighed. "Of course you do." Then after having thought it out. "Wait, how did you get into potions? You couldn't have gotten more than an E."

"I've talked to Professor Snape and we've come to an agreement. I'll tell you about it later."

Harry and Hermione made their way to the dungeons as soon as the bell had rung, after making Ron promise that he would show Imy to the charms classroom.

"What do you think he's going to teach us?"

Harry shrugged. "Knowing Snape he's probably going to give us a test." Harry didn't know it at the moment but his statement happened to be true.

There were only two Slytherins in the N.E.W.T.s. Potions class. Those two happened to be Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini. Three Ravenclaws sat in the back of the room, they were Padma Patil, another girl that Harry had never seen before, and a boy whose name Harry had forgotten but who was on the Ravenclaw quidditch team. He, Hermione, and surprisingly Neville Longbottom were the only Gryffindors, and there was one Hufflepuff, Ernie McMillan. In total they were nine. It was going to be an interesting class.

Snape began the class by counting them and announcing to the class that there would be four groups, and that they had a minute to chose. Zabini who had been eyeing the nameless Ravenclaw girl quickly asked her to be his partner. Malfoy glared at him and tried to get him to see reason, but it wasn't working for the girl had readily agreed and she and Zabini were already talking to each other animatedly.

Before Harry could catch Hermione's eye and get her to be his partner she had joined Neville at a different table. He made to stand up and join them, having done the math and figured out that one of their groups would have three people, however, Ernie had already sat down next to Neville. The last two Ravenclaws had already taken a table near the front. Harry looked towards the other two groups, sitting closer to the back, and then to the other person without a partner. Draco Malfoy, too was looking at him, but it didn't seem to phase him that Harry would be his new partner.

"Potter!" Snape snapped.

Harry jumped and looked up.

"Move, Potter!"

Harry sighed and gathered his things and walked with slow deliberation to the table in the middle of the room. He dropped his things unceremoniously onto it and sat down. Snape was glaring at him, and Harry glared back.

"Now, that that is settled," Snape continued. "Today you will be taking a test."

Hermione shot Harry an incredulous look.

Harry shrugged and muttered to her as loud as he could, "I had nothing to do with it, even if I did predict it."

For some reason Malfoy found that amusing and let out a small laugh. Harry gave him a look before rolling his eyes.

"You cannot work with your new partner or partners, you cannot cheat, all instructions must be followed. This will be turned in by the end of the first period. I expect everyone to finish." With that said, Snape waved his wand at the air and parchment was before every student.

Harry sneaked a glance at Malfoy's parchment before beginning, and found that Malfoy's questions were not the same as his, or were at least not in the same order. Harry grinned to himself and then began. To his surprise he knew the answer to the first question, and the next. The third made him think a little harder, but after a moments consideration he knew what the answer could be, and so it went on.

Harry was not the first to finish the test, that honor went to Hermione, but he was the second, and he was pretty confident in himself that he had gotten at least eighty percent of them right, if not all.

It was strange, Harry thought, as he waited for the rest of them to finish, that Malfoy had said nothing snide to him, like he usually would have. He wondered if it was something to with his father being in Azkaban, or perhaps—Harry glanced at Malfoy's left arm—the fact that he possibly was a death eater.

"Time," Snape called out. Then with a wave of his wand all the parchments were on his desk in a neat stack. Neville somewhere behind Harry groaned and Harry knew the other Gryffindor had not done particularly well on that test.

When he turned to look at them, he noticed that Hermione was patting him on the shoulder and whispering comforting words to him. Harry turned back to Snape a second later and noticed that he had put instructions up on the board. The potion Harry was surprised to see, was the same one that had made him late for dinner. Inwardly he smiled to himself.

"I'll get the ingredients, Potter," Malfoy said. "Get the cauldron set up, and try not to melt it before we even begin."

Even though his comment meant to insult, Harry found that the voice of the Slytherin did not carry its usual malice but was almost teasing. Harry decided he was just imagining things and shook his head, and quickly began to prepare their cauldron, something he had been doing for the past week, and he could probably manage in his sleep.

"Here," Malfoy shoved a few things towards him. "Prepare those, I'll start doing the same with the rest."

Harry barely gave him a nod and began.

Harry was too focused, about fifteen minutes later, on the number of counterclockwise stirs on his cauldron that he did not hear the hissing sound coming from the potion behind him—but Malfoy did. Malfoy first alerted Snape and then turned to tell Harry to move just in case when it exploded, falling towards them, and before they could even possibly move it was covering them both and their own potion which proceeded to give a large gurgle before it flew out of the cauldron in some sort of green foam that seemed to cover the classroom. The last thing Harry saw before he fell unconscious was Draco Malfoy trying to grab his hand and pull him as far away from the foam as possible.

To be continued...


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