The next morning at breakfast, an owl swooped down to the Gryffindor table carrying a bright red envelope, and dropped it onto the table in front of Ron.

“Oh no,” said Ron slowly. “Mum sent me a Howler.”

“Well open it!” urged Theo, “before it blows up!”

Gulping, Ron slid his finger under the seal. The evil thing immediately popped open and started screaming.

“RONALD WEASLEY!! WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME WERE YOU THINKING? I THINK YOU'RE SAFE AT SCHOOL ATTENDING THE HALLOWEEN FEAST AND YOU RUN OFF TO FIGHT A TROLL? YOU ARE LUCKY TO BE ALIVE! DO YOU REALIZE THAT THAT CALL FROM MINERVA COULD VERY WELL HAVE BEEN TO INFORM ME OF YOUR DEATH? OF ALL THE STUPID, DANGEROUS, FOOLHARDY STUNTS YOU COULD HAVE PULLED, THIS IS THE LIMIT! YOU WILL SEND ME A LETTER AT ONCE EXPLAINING YOUR ACTIONS, AND APOLOGIZE TO YOUR PROFESSORS! I WILL KNOW IF YOU DO NOT! EVEN YOUR BROTHERS DID NOT CAUSE THIS MUCH TROUBLE IN THEIR FIRST YEAR! YOUR FATHER AND I ARE VERY DISAPPOINTED!”

Ron had ducked down, looking like he wanted to hide under the breakfast table, and remained there staring off into space, seemingly completely stunned, until Hermione shook him by the shoulder. “Ron. Ron!” Finally he looked at her, face completely red, and whispered, “a Howler. She sent me a Howler! Even Fred and George didn't get one of those until second year!”

“Well that makes two of us,” Harry said glumly, “your turn, Blaise.”

“Hmm...not my guardians' style, I think,” said Blaise, “they'd think it...common.”

“Hey!” Said Ron, suddenly angry.

“Didn't mean it that way, Ron. My guardians are...old-fashioned, is all.”

“My Dad wouldn't either,” said Theo, “he generally just...talks.”

“Talking's the worst part,” opined Hermione. “I imagine I'd rather be grounded.”

“You imagine?” asked Ron, “Haven't you ever been in trouble?”

“Once or twice,” answered Hermione, “I've just never been punished for it. My parents just tell me what I did wrong and how to do better in the future, and I do it.”

“You're mental,” said Ron, “how can you stand to be that good all the time?”

“Better than getting a Howler,” Hermione retorted.

“Yeah,” said Blaise firmly, “we should definitely have followed the rules and let the troll eat you.”

To everyone's surprise, Hermione looked down at that. “You're right, I'm sorry. I just really hate getting in trouble. I don't understand how you all can be so blasé about it.”

“The trick is to do what you want, then not get caught,” said Blaise, matter-of-fact, “I rarely get in trouble.”

“Yeah, you're better at that than even I am,” said Harry, “that's why we work so well together. I misbehave, and you keep me from getting caught. Most of the time, anyway.”

“As long as you don't want to get caught,” said Blaise, “anyway, you ever tell these guys about the centaurs?”

“No. I guess I forgot.”

“Forgot what?” Theo asked, sounding excited.

“Harry went and checked out the Forbidden Forest. Turns out it's full of centaurs.”

“Harry!” Hermione exclaimed, “You could've been killed! Or even expelled!”

“Yeah, but I wasn't,” said Harry, shrugging, “and the centaurs were cool.”

“Don't they hate humans?” Hermione asked, “I read somewhere that they'll spear you as soon as look at you.”

“Well they definitely weren't friendly,” Harry said, “but they didn't really hurt me. Just dropped me off at the edge of the forest and pointed me towards Hogwarts. Apparently they don't hurt kids.”

“You sure that's why?” Asked Blaise.

“Yup. They even said that.”

“Luckily you're a kid, then!” Ron exclaimed, “imagine if you'd been an adult!”

“They'd've probably killed me,” Harry admitted, “but it was cool, anyway.”

At lunch that day, the three grounded Slytherins shared a plate of sandwiches in the Slytherin common room.

“At least we're all grounded,” Theo commented, good humor seemingly restored, “this would suck if it were just me.”

“Glad you can be so cheerful about it,” Harry responded unhappily, adding the final touches to his magical mobile.

“What's wrong with you?” Blaise wanted to know.

“I've got a lesson with Snape this afternoon. This is due and he's already ticked at me. I'm also supposed to have practice today.”

“Ah. Yeah, I forgot the grounding was worse for you than for the rest of us,” said Blaise.

“How'm I supposed to be ready for my match? I'll only have two days to practice!”

“Just play your best,” suggested Theo.

“Our captain says, 'Don't just play your best, play well. If your best is not good enough, then you don't belong on the team.' If I keep missing practices and stuff he'll kick me off.”

“I suppose that's fair,” said Blaise, “you can't just play in games.”

“I'm not denying that it's fair, Blaise,” Harry said moodily, “being fair doesn't make it any more fun.”

“So stop getting in so much trouble,” argued Blaise, “I mean, this time it was hard to avoid, but half the time you're ticking Snape off on purpose. You can't blame him for punishing you when you're pranking him.”

“I didn't say I blamed him!” said Harry, “leave it alone, all right? I know I'm a screw-up!”

“That's not what I said,” answered Blaise, starting to sound annoyed.

“You said it's not Miles' fault, you said it's not Snape's fault. What you mean is, it's my fault. You think I don't bloody know that?! I can't even stay out of trouble when I want to, and most of the time I don't. You never seemed to have a problem with that, before.”

“And I don't now! Merlin, Harry, would you calm down for a bit and listen to me? I'm hardly urging you to turn into Hermione, I'm just saying maybe you should be more careful, or choose someone to piss off that's not Snape!”

“Fine,” Harry said, “sorry. I'm just in a bad mood.”

“I noticed. What is wrong? You weren't nearly this bad this morning.”

Harry sighed. “Snape's being an asshole.”

“How so? You've only seen him in the one class, right?”

“Yeah, but he was being all weird! Didn't you notice?”

“He took points from Theo for being an idiot, and...?”

“I don't know! Usually he's a jerkoff but he takes it out on the Gryffindors. This time he was attacking everybody! And he kept...looking at me? I dunno. He was being weird. I think he's still mad at me.”

“And this bothered you because...?”

“I don't know, okay? I apologized, for goodness' sake! I told him I was sorry for being an idiot, and he seemed okay, so why's he still mad? And why do I care?”

Blaise looked at him, a light in his eyes the only thing betraying his amusement. “I should probably not answer that question.”

Harry frowned at him, confused. “Why not?”

“Well, I rather like you,” said Blaise, a small smile appearing on his face, “I'd really rather keep you around for awhile, but I distinctly remember you mentioning committing hara-kiri in this situation.”

“I do not like him. He's still a total ass.”

“I didn't say you liked him. But you do finally get it that he cares for you, and you do care about his opinion now. As for why he's still mad at you, I'd say you scared the hell out of him and he's going to be on edge for a couple of days. You'll notice he's still not entirely happy with Theo and I, either.”

“Yeah!” contributed Theo, “he even took points from me for my potion!”

“Probably because you threw mandrake in it when he specifically told us not to,” said Blaise.

“I wanted to know what would happen! It's not my fault it turned all weird!”

“Not your- come on, Theo!” exclaimed Blaise.

“Okay, fine, maybe it was, a little, but still! He's the one that practically told us cool stuff would happen if we threw mandrake in at the wrong time!”

“He didn't say anything about what would happen, he just said specifically not to throw mandrake root into the potion,” corrected Blaise.

“Exactly! Why would he tell us not to do it if nothing would happen?”

Harry looked at Blaise, finally smiling. “He's got a point. No survival instinct, but a good nose for how to cause trouble. We really ought to use him more often.”

Blaise smiled back. “You mean like to take revenge on Snape?”

“Revenge for what?” Theo wanted to know, “I thought we weren't blaming him for the grounding?”

“We're not,” said Blaise, giving Harry a knowing look, “we're blaming him for liking Harry.”

“Oh!” said Theo enthusiastically, “that makes...no sense.”

Harry shook his head. “I never said I was going to do that.”

“True,” said Blaise, “but I still think you probably will.”

Harry scowled at him. “What are you, a shrink?”

“A what?”

Harry shook his head. “Never mind.”

“Come in, Harry.”

Harry watched Snape warily as he walked in, unsure how to react to the man. The last time he'd talked to him had just been too confusing, and he still wasn't sure if Snape was still mad at him. When he was seated across the desk from Snape, though, he decided to just ask.

“Are you still mad at me?”

Severus looked at the boy, confused. “I didn't think you would care.”

Instantly Harry straightened up and gave him his more normal, defiant glare. “I don't.”

Severus smiled inwardly. Apparently I'm making some progress. “No, I am not still angry.”

“Why were you so mad in Potions then?”

“Not being angry at you does not prevent me from being stressed, Harry. I am not perfect. Besides that, your friend Theodore is a young idiot.”

“No he's not,” said Harry.

“I am aware that he is your friend, Harry-”

“No, I mean, he's really not. You just have to understand how he thinks.”

“I was not aware that he thought at all.”

“Sure he does,” said Harry, “he's actually quite clever. You told him not to add mandrake to his potion, and he deduced from that that something interesting would happen if he did. He then made the educated decision to use that knowledge to cause as much trouble as possible. It's very Slytherin, if you see things from his perspective.”

“I see,” said Severus, “he's an idiot. Remind me to give him a detention next time, instead of just taking points.”

“Remind me not to tell you anything, next time,” Harry retorted.

Severus sighed. “So, did you manage to get your project done?”

“Yeah,” said Harry, starting to relax. Good. Everything can just be normal. Sounds great. “Just a second.” He rummaged around in his book-bag until the strange glowing mobile came out. It promptly floated up to a foot below the ceiling, and Harry watched proudly as the miniature Earth floated slowly around the miniature sun, casting moving shadows all over the room.

“Well done,” Snape said appreciatively, “the rotation is a particularly nice touch.”

Harry stayed quiet, as usual trying to ignore the warmth in his chest that came from the man's praise. So what if he noticed? What do I care? But the man liked him. No adult had ever liked him, before. McGonagall likes me, and so does Pomfrey. It's no different. And anyway I don't like him. Blaise is wrong. McGonagall and Pomfrey just liked the students in general, though. Snape seemed to like him for him.

Does. Not. Matter.

“Have you come up with an idea for your next project?”

Harry thrust his other thoughts away. “Sorta.”

“Harry.”

“I thought about it! But it was Halloween, and then I had to finish this project, and then it was now.”

“In other words, you procrastinated and then didn't have time to do everything you needed to.”

Harry frowned. “Something like that. I did think about it, though!”

“Did you?” Snape said doubtfully.

Harry scowled. “I figured 'cause I worked on a sort of 'complexity' thing before, I'd work on a sort of 'power' thing, now. I just couldn't think of anything I wanted to do.”

“I see.”

Harry smirked, deciding to pick at the man a bit. “Transfigurations are getting too easy,” he said, “I can transfigure little things from across the Great Hall.”

It earned him a glare. “I had, in fact, noticed that,” said Snape dryly, “as did my other students, Minerva McGonagall, and Gregory Nott. Only Nott had the presence of mind to inform me of this, however.”

Harry grinned. “I just have superior connections, that's all. As a Slytherin you ought to appreciate the value of allies. Fred and George were a good start-”

“That never happened.”

“-but you really ought to use them more often. They're quite worth it, if you don't mind the chaos. You'll work with them one day, and fall victim to them the next.”

“Precisely.”

“But they're really quite helpful. They were more than willing to kidnap Percy for me, for example.”

This time Snape really glared. “I imagine. It had not occurred to me that you would have had to get rid of Percy Weasley for that...stunt.”

Harry just smiled, knowing that Snape was just trying to be intimidating, and wasn't actually angry. Somehow the thought that Percy had allowed himself to be captured made him really happy, too. We'll make a real person out of him, yet.

“And did it occur to you that you would be depriving Percy – who had already helped you once – of needed potions practice?”

“Sure, but it was important! And besides, Percy seemed willing enough.”

“I see,” Snape said, rubbing the bridge of his nose, “your capacity for involving otherwise sensible people in your tomfoolery is nothing short of astounding. And that is not a compliment.”

Harry looked at him, confused. “You really think Percy is a sensible person?”

Snape released his nose and looked up. “A point. Miss Granger seems sensible enough, however.”

Harry smirked at him, holding back a snicker. “Definitely. Her suggestion for your Halloween costume was a vampire bat. It was a very 'sensible' suggestion; I just couldn't do it at that distance.”

Severus stared at the boy. Percy Weasley, Minerva McGonagall, and now Hermione Granger? How does he do it? “How fortunate for both of us.”

“Both?”

“I have not- yet – given you detention for that prank. I certainly would have had you done anything bigger.”

“Maybe next year you should dress yourself up,” Harry suggested. “Then you'd get to choose.”

Snape looked at him incredulously for a second before sighing. “I put up with far too much, with you.”

“You could still give up,” Harry suggested, then sobered. For once, the thought didn't make him happy.

“Not going to happen,” said Severus, noticing the change in Harry's tone. He doesn't want me to? “I promise.”

Harry looked away. “Sure.”

“Harry-”

“Aren't you supposed to be teaching me something?”

“Do not interrupt me.”

Harry glared, for real this time. Leave me alone. “I don't want to talk.”

“Then say so. Don't be rude.”

See? He really just wants you to change. Soon as he figures out that you won't, he'll leave. “I am rude. I am rude, obnoxious, lazy, and otherwise worthless. Either give up or get used to it. I'm not changing.”

“Once again, I am not asking you to. But rude is not who you are, it is how you act, especially when you are uncomfortable. That can change without you changing. As for the rest- it's simply not true, and I'll thank you not to repeat it.”

Harry looked down briefly before declaring, “you ask too much.”

“What do you mean?”

“I cannot act the way you want me to act, or talk the way you want me to talk, or be the person you want me to be,” Harry answered, frustrated, why doesn't he get this? “I'm a screw-up, okay? And you know what? I like it. Being this way has kept me alive for ten years. You're not going to convince me that it's not still necessary. I don't know how to change, even if I wanted to, which I don't. You ask too much.”

Severus looked at Harry, swallowing. And he talks. If only he knew how to respond. “You are safe, here, Harry.”

“Bullshit.”

“Who threatens you?”

“No-one.”

“Then how are you not safe?”

Harry looked away, frustrated beyond anything he could explain. “You don't get it.” I don't even know what safe is.

“That is why I want you to explain.”

“I can't.”

“Try.”

“I don't want to.”

“Please?”

Harry looked at Snape, taking in his almost pleading expression, but finally just shook his head. “Can- can we just go back to the lesson, please?”

Snape sighed, then shook his head and looked back up at Harry. “Very well.”

Harry looked away, surprised by a sense of shame. Coward. “Thanks.”

On Monday Harry arrived for his usual 'talking' meeting with Snape, and immediately climbed up to his alcove near the ceiling before Snape came in, determined to ignore the man. Things were just getting too confusing, lately, when he talked to him. The annoying thing was, the man wasn't any different. He would say and do exactly the same things as he had always done, only now those things mattered, for some reason Harry couldn't fathom. I. do. Not. Care. But he kept acting weird around the man, lately, saying things he didn't mean to and feeling things he couldn't explain. So I just won't talk to him.

And so when Snape came in, Harry was able to stare down at him for a second before the man looked up. The man just stared for a second before speaking.

“What are you doing up there?”

Suddenly Harry remembered the last time he'd climbed up here, and how Snape had flipped out when he'd climbed down head first, and requested that Harry warn him the next time. I worried him that time, too, he realized. He really doesn't like it when I put myself in danger. He never has. The thought set off more of the confusing mixed emotions that had sent Harry up into the alcove in the first place, and he fought to shut them down.

“Felt like it.”

“Will you come down?”

“No.”

“Please.” It was halfway between a demand and a request, and this time Harry decided to acquiesce.

“Fine.” But I'll do it my way. Frowning, Harry reached down as he had before to start his head-first descent. You asked for it.

Getting to the bottom, Harry felt a childish impulse to stick his tongue out at the man, but didn't. Instead he sat on the couch, curling his legs up in front of his body and facing Snape silently. You can't make me talk to you, though.

Hoping Snape would get the message, Harry leaned forward to pull his charms book out of his book-bag, and started practicing. Thankfully, Snape seemed content to leave him mostly alone, at first, just occasionally correcting Harry's pronunciation of the spells he practiced. Eventually, though, the man reached into a pocket in his robes, pulled out an envelope, and placed it on the table between the two of them. Harry looked at the envelope, then at Snape, then at the envelope again. It looked just like the one that had contained photos of his mother.

“What are those?” he finally demanded.

“Photos,” responded Snape calmly.

“Of what?” Don't do this to me again. I looked at the ones of- of my Mother, isn't that good enough?

“Of your father.”

Harry looked and met Snape's eyes. “Why?”

“Because you should know him, as much as you can,” answered Severus carefully. Regardless of my own feelings on the subject.

“You never mention him.”

“We...did not get along. That is irrelevant. He...he was a courageous man,” he finally managed to bite out. He died keeping Harry safe. I can give him that, at least.

“You hated him,” Harry said flatly.

Severus swallowed. Damn. “That is irrelevant.”

“Whatever. I don't want the photos.”

“It is important.”

“Not to me.”

“To me, then,” Severus said. Not that I know why.

“So I don't have a choice.” Harry's voice held a warning.

“I want you to look at them. It doesn't have to be now.”

“Why?”

“Same reason as for your mother.”

“Which was...?”

“They loved you dearly, Harry. You should not forget them.”

“What's to forget? Nobody remembers anything from before they're a year old.”

“Then the photos will at least show you that they loved you.”

“Great. Show me what I will never have. They loved me, and they're dead. Fan-fucking-tastic. I feel so much better.”

“Did you even look at the pictures of your mother? Of how she looked at you? That is how your relatives should look at you. That is what you should always have had. I just want to show you that your relatives are the 'screw-ups' and not you.”

“Then explain to me why they treated Dudley so well, huh? Clearly they're capable of loving, they just don't love me. They tell me it's because I'm a freak, and the child of freaks. So the freaks loved me, great. The point is normal people won't. Won't ever. So why the hell should I care? And why the hell should I change to get along with you?”

“Maybe I'm not normal, by your standards.”

Harry paused for a moment, stymied. It was true that Snape was nothing like the Dursleys. If it was true, as the Dursleys seemed to think, that nobody normal would care about Harry, then Snape was not normal. And neither were my parents. But that meant- if I'm not normal, and my parents aren't normal, and he's not normal, then who is?

“Do you get it, now? Your idea of 'normal' is warped, Harry. That is what I am trying to explain. The fact that your abominable excuse for an aunt and uncle do not care for you as they should has nothing to do with who you are and everything to do with them. Who they are, what they do. Their fault, not yours. They would have treated you that way no matter how you acted because that is who they are. They are the freaks. Anybody who would treat a child as you have been treated is as freakish as they come.”

Harry just stared at him, torn, before finally finding the flaw in Snape's logic. “If they're so 'freakish,' and I'm so normal, then why didn't anybody ever do anything about it? I've lived there for ten years, and nobody but you seems to care.”

Snape winced, and Harry knew he'd scored a point. “We didn't know, Harry. We didn't watch closely enough, and so we didn't know. Now we do, and now things will change.”

“Sure they will. And then the world will be all sunshine and rainbows, and little ponies and Carebears will come out to play. Where is your cavalry, Snape? Hell, where were you planning on putting me, after your great rescue mission? Got a special street corner put away somewhere?”

“A house, actually.”

Harry scoffed. “Yeah, 'cause you're gonna take me into your home for the summer.”

“If that is what it takes to get you out of that house then yes, that is exactly what I will do.”

“And you- you what?”

“Eloquent.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Repeat that last sentence, please? I think I may have gone delusional for a moment.”

“If I need to take you into my home for the summer in order to get you away from your relatives I will happily do so.”

Lasting delusion, this one. Harry didn't say anything, just trying to process, before stating, “you'll change your mind.”

“I'll thank you not to insult my character, Harry. I have not lied to you, and I do not break my promises. You will not be rid of me anytime soon.”

“Sure.”

“I have said that you are not going back there, and I stand by that.”

“And I said that I would go where I pleased, and I stand by that.”

Snape met his eyes. “I cannot stop you. You'll go if you wish to. But if you do, I will come and find you and bring you back. I will not allow you to stay where you are unsafe.”

“It is my home.”

“It was your home. Hogwarts is your home, now, as is mine, if you wish it, and I imagine the Weasleys' as well.”

Severus watched as as Harry's eyes filled with renewed anxiety. “I don't even know the Weasleys.”

“Mine then, if you choose. I will not force you. But I will not allow you to return to that house. It is my responsibility to keep you safe. It would be beyond neglectful to leave you with your relatives any longer.”

“They are my family.”

“They have never treated you as such.”

Harry looked away. “I never acted right.”

“And you never will, because their expectations are unreasonable. In reality I doubt they have any real expectations at all. It does not matter how you act, it will never be enough, because for whatever reason they have decided to hate you. That will not change, Harry.”

“They don't hate me.”

“Harry-”

“They don't, okay?! Petunia helps me! She keeps me away from Uncle, sometimes! She gives me food!”

“If you've been good.”

“Yes, if I've been good, because I always get mad and I'm never good and I never learn. I'll just be better, this time. I know how to control my magic, now. I won't do freaky stuff anymore. I'll be polite and quiet and I won't eat so much and-”

“You'll change, in other words.”

Harry stopped, suddenly noticing the tears that had started falling down his face. “N-no. I'll just- I'll behave better, like you want me to.”

“By eating less.”

Harry realized what he'd said and looked down, wiping his tears furiously on a sleeve.

“I would never ask that of you, Harry. Ever. That, alone, is abuse. You arrived here far skinny enough, I assure you.”

Tears still falling, Harry finally whispered, “leave me alone.”

“Harry-”

“No! Stop talking! Leave me alone!”

He fled the Room of Requirement for his dorm, leaving Snape staring at the door behind him.

Dumbledore had better have moved the Dursleys, was Severus' last thought before he, too, left.