i just found this story a yesterday and couldn't stop reading it after i started. it is my personal opinion that yes harry needs to think things trough more before he acts but lupin needs to quit acting like a five year old who didn't get his way when he wanted them. i love this story. keep up the good work. :)
| Title: Chapter 29
| 29 Aug 2014 11:39 pm
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| Reviewer: anonymous (Anonymous)
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great story!! is there any chance this story will be completed?
| Title: Chapter 29
| 17 Aug 2014 10:40 pm
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| Reviewer: Erik (Anonymous)
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I understand not wanting fluffy!Snape, but I feel like as a person he's been too willfully ignorant. At this point, he's aware that Harry has not had a happy childhood. Prudence should tell him that something is not quite right with Harry developmentally. Often, neglected children won't be able to form attachments properly and can't rely on adults to help them. Snape ought to know that. I'm sll for having a grouchy Snape, but really only to a point.
Though your Snape sees incredibly in character, Remus seems off. Even when he is nice, it seems that it doesn't come to him easily. He's cold, distant, and doesn't seem to like Harry at all. Now, maybe it's just because it's from Harry's perspective, but it seems like Remus is just a less responsible Snape who tries to force out some niceties. The characterizations of the two are almost two similar. Snape should know that a young man needs adult support, and he has seen how Lupin treats Harry. Frankly, it feels like one bad thing after another with no mitigating factors. It seems hopeless, and as a reader, I would expect consequences from the neglectful actions of the adults in Harry's life. I would expect depression; I imagine any teenager put in Harry's position, mature or not, would yield to teenage stress. We've already seen some semi-but-not-really-suicidal thoughts from Harry, and there need to be consequences that soften the weight put on Harry, rather than make things worse, because eventually, he ought to break from all the stress. Moreover, the quest from Dumbledore is very interesting, and even if it's not the main plot, a resolution to it would be appreciated.
Overall, a well-written story that catches the emotions and squeezes the heart. Feelings of loneliness and not being able to depend on people is terrible, and I relive them every time I return to this Harry's mind. There must be a fix, some sort of redemption for Lupin and Snape (we've seen that Harry's tried to be a better person, even though he has failed a few times to deserve the trust given him), because the only reason to leave those two without a lesson in being a proper adult (I believe they've both failed spectacularly) is if the moral of your story is that "everything sucks, Life's not fair, there is no meaning."
On a different note, the Patroni theory was interesting, and it did catch my eye when Harry first wondered why Lupin didn't try to use his patronus. You seem to be in world-creator mode, solving problems and expanding on ideas in the HP world. However, I would like to see some character development in Lupin and Snape. Snape's a smart guy! He should understand by now...
| Title: Chapter 29
| 03 Apr 2014 12:50 pm
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| Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous)
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So far, the best written story I've found on this site. Sincerely hope it continues.
I'll be saving the link to read this again.
What makes it so intense is the lack of explanations - too many writers feel the need to explain every character's intentions but you allow the story to reveal these emotions through the characters physical reactions.
| Title: Chapter 28
| 03 Apr 2014 12:37 pm
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| Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous)
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Fascinating Story, definitely one of the best I've read so far.
| Title: Chapter 29
| 13 Mar 2014 2:36 am
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| Reviewer: Mary (Anonymous)
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Any chance of an update soon ? Your story is great. I hope you continue.
I've really enjoyed reading your series; I hope you haven't given up on this story. I can't wait for you to update soon!!!!
Wow such a great chapter! I have some questions about hermoines gift, does she know about Harry wanting to test the chamber of secrets to see if he can still speak in parsletongue? Also what if hermoine charmed the diary so that she could see everything harry writes and can respond like tom riddle in the chamber of secrets book? Is that why hermoine wants harry to use it so they can communicate without anyone interfering or eavesdropping? An my final question, does hermoine suspect Hadrian to be harry?
| Title: Chapter 29
| 21 Nov 2013 5:50 am
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| Reviewer: Mary (Anonymous)
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I started reading this story over the summer and have been enjoying it. I hope you are still writing. I see that there was a year gap in updates before I started reading. I hope you will continue and not wait another year. Well thought out story. Well written. Keep up the good work.
Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it. I do have a chapter that's almost ready. I'm just a little busy with exams and the holidays right now. Hopefully I'll have it posted over the weekend.
| Title: Chapter 29
| 02 Nov 2013 12:17 am
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| Reviewer: Blink (Anonymous)
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I really can't wait for the next chapter..!
This story is great and original :)
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