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Reviews For The Poor of God
Beyond the quality of the prose--lucid and precise and intense and poetic, without falling into the trap of ostentation or excess--I think what I most admire is the consistency of the characterizations. It's hard enough to maintain character integrity in the ordinary course of things,to have the characters behave in ways that seem true and believable, and this is a great strength of your work. All the characters sound like they should, all the time. And that's good. What makes the story great is that the characterizations remain consistent and believable even as the characters experience upheaval and enormous change. One of the problems with some (okay, a lot) of the Snape/Harry stories I've read (or tried to, only to give up in disgust partway through) is how radically not just the perceptions, but the *personality* of Snape, in particular, change. He turns, with ridiculous abruptness and ease, from an embittered, sarcastic, savagely intelligent, acerbic, impatient, self-loathing man, into some kind of fluffy-bunny cuddle-dispensing machine. And it doesn't make any sense. People just aren't like that, not in my experience. Even if Snape were to come to love Harry deeply, I fail to be convinced that he would as a necessary result cease to be embittered, sarcastic, intelligent, acerbic, and impatient. And it certainly wouldn't happen in one fell swoop of suddent illumination. He is the sum of his experiences, after all, and all the experiences that have made him what he is are still there; they aren’t going to just vanish into the pink fizzy clouds of perfect love. Yes, people can change, and yes, the sort of intense events Snape and Harry have been involved with over the past several days are likely to trigger such change, as they are doing in your story, but it doesn't just bloody *happen*. It's a struggle. What I like about your story is that it shows that struggle. Even as Snape and Harry start to realize things between them are changing, they still remain essentially the same people. It's all well and good for Snape to understand, via Legilimency that Harry *really, truly doesn't think his own life is worth defending*, but it's even better for him to meet that knowledge with frustrated anger and impatience, because that's how Snape deals with what he doesn't--or doesn't want to--understand. And Harry may cherish Snape's letters and allow himself, in a moment of truly extreme duress, to let the man hold him while he cries, but he's still the same kid who spent his childhood in a cupboard, and has no reason to think authority figures--especially authority figures who've spent the past five years being utterly brutal in all ways but the physical to him--are especially to be trusted. So anyway, muchos kudos. And I also have to say I appreciate the irony of having Snape, who has made an art of self-flagellation, be so completely baffled by Harry's ingrained self-loathing. The difference, I suppose, is that Snape has actually done things to feel guilty about, while Harry really hasn't, but it's still an interesting blind spot. Most intense moments in the chapter, for me: 1) "A moment later he takes a step back, reeling. He feels breathless, tiny and trapped. He feels like a child so dirty and insignificant that he deserves nothing better than to be shut up in a cupboard and forgotten about." Brilliant. Horribly painful, but brilliant, and really probably the best way for Snape to really *understand* Harry. And 2) The last paragraph, particularly the last line, which made me cry, even as it reaffirmed your powers of characterization. It’s just so completely Snape, his inevitable willingness, even need, to turn Harry’s reactions into punishment for himself. That sense of inevitability reminds me that I wanted to ask you, how far in advance are you plotting this story? When I say inevitability, by the way, I don’t mean predictability. On the contrary, I’ve been repeatedly surprised by the way the story unfolds. But at the same time, once the surprises happen, it seems as though nothing else really *could* have happened, if that makes any sense. Sincerely, Annette Author's Response: :-) Keeping them both in character, depicting the emotional journey above any other sort of plot, was always my goal for this story, so I'm glad it feels that way to you. And of course the cupboard line, as well as the last paragraph, were moments I was especially hoping people would notice, so whee! :) Now to your question: how far in advance am I plotting this story? Simple answer: I'm not. When I first got the idea for the sequel, I knew three things. 1) Snape and Harry would correspond, 2) Luna would play a role in the story and 3) there would be a (spoiler for the next chapter). Everything else, the Draught, the attack by Vernon, I had no idea was coming until it was actually coming off my keyboard. Some people are plotters. I'm a pantser. :-) As in "fly by the seat of my".
If I was going to count the ways that this chapter made my spine shiver and all that, I think it would probably be like, every sentence. Well, actually, that is a lie, because this line was extremely funny XD "... given the choice between venting his spleen and imploding from the pressure, Dumbledore would prefer he do the former. Potions masters are less easily come by than Defense teachers, after all." I LOVE how you can still insert a dry humour into the whole thing. Yeah, so that sentence was funny as well as that one where Poppy's like, stay away from my dog! Except that one's only funny because my cousin has actually done that. Accidentally killed a dog she was looking after, I mean XD On another note (and I'm going to apologise for the long foray into netspeak) OMG SNAPE/HARRY LUFF. OMG OMG OMG OMG. So first of all: HARRY YOU ARE STUPID. Any points you had for being emotionally and physically abused, as well as you know not being able to tell if someone actually likes you or not, are lost because you are an idiot. If the world is giving you lemons, you MAKE FREAKING LEMONADE. YOU DON'T LET THEM TURN MOULDY OR PROD THEM WITH YOUR WAND UNTIL THEY EXPLODE. NO NO NO D: And secondly: SNAPEY. REJECTION BUUUUUUUURNS. But thankfully this opens up another opportunity for you to be extra-dependable for Harry and is yet another brick on the yellow brick ro - I mean, the road towards SNAPE/HARRY LUFF and MAJOR CUDDLE FACTOR and world peace XD (OH YEAH and that's funny you should mention art, because I was thinking of doing some XD Except I'm like majorly rusty and whatever but meh it should be fine XD) Author's Response: God, I love you like pie. Honestly. You always laugh and cry at the right bits. And if you did art for me, I would love you like BURNING. BURNING PIE. ...or maybe something more appetizing than that. Don't be too hard on Harry. I am currently in the middle of him feeling really bad about all that. HE CAN'T HELP BEING EMOTIONALLY RETARDED.
Bravo, More, More, (pauses to throw bouquet on stage.) Author's Response: Happy endings...yeah. God knows. I sure don't. I'll do my best to do justice by them, that's all I can promise. :-)
So many moments in this chapter left me breathless. I knew from an earlier comment you made to a reviewer that this was going to start from Snape's POV and I couldn't wait to read it. I felt Snape's panic when he realized Harry was gone. The look that he gave Harry (the one Harry had never seen before) just brought tears to my eyes. I could just "see" it. I loved how natural it felt for Snape to comfort Harry; that was so unbelievely touching to me. Snape's conversation with Dumbledore had me smiling ("given the choice between venting his spleen and imploding from the pressure, Dumbledore would prefer he do the former. Potions masters are less easily come by than Defense teachers, after all.") SO Snape. More favorites: Snape asking Harry - so in character for me - "Satisfy my curiosity. Do you defy all orders on principle, or only mine?" I laughed out loud at some of Pomfrey's comments (""I am beginning to think," Pomfrey says darkly as he enters, "that you ought not be given charge of a dog anyone was fond of, Severus." and "If he is an idiot, then he is in excellent company." A much needed moment of humor from the heart wretching events earlier. But then you had me back to needing tissues again when Snape enters Harry's mind. So incredibly sad. I found myself getting mad at Snape for pushing Harry so hard to understand why he didn't fight back against Dursley, and at the same time loved the speech about how Voldemort would put him on a pedestal even if Harry were to be defeated by him. Very powerful. And Harry's confusion with Snape's care just broke my heart, as well as Snape's reaction to it outside in the corridor. Those last two sentences were heartbreaking for me. This is definitely my favorite fanfic so far. I noticed a pattern of a new chapter about every other day so far - you're impressive at how eloquently you can tell the story and the speed you can put those words together. But it also means I have to wait another 48 hours probably for more. Sigh....
Author's Response: Yes, you need have no fears for premature mushiness from this story. Mature mushiness, on the other hand... |
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