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Reviews For Slave Child
Harry's thoughts are pretty dark, though, and he obviously still distrusts Snape and is very cautious with him. You are writing this very well. I'm glad that you're going to make your characters work for their future relationship. Please keep updating! Thanks. Author's Response: Thank you! Yes, Harry is still pretty distrustful (and who can blame him, really?) and it will take a while before they become close. Thank you for reading!
I decided to reread your story (b/c I love it so very much). This chapter, on a second read-through, has me thinking about that awful spell that Harry cast against Draco in HBP. Sectumsempra. Ugh! What a vile spell! You have completely reversed the situation here and made Draco cast an unknown spell against Harry. Of course, in HBP Draco had tried to cast Crucio (sp?) against Harry first. However, it's still unacceptable, imho, that Harry cast a dangerous, unknown spell against anyone, even Draco. Even in retaliation for Crucio. Even in self-defense. Harry was just plain wrong to do what he did to Draco. There is no excuse. Just as in your story there is absolutely no excuse for what Draco has done to Harry. I agree that casting an unknown spell should potentially send the caster to Azkaban. Harry ended up serving detention with Snape. What a laugh. I was outraged that that was all they did to Harry. Talk about coddling The Boy Who Lived. As far as I know, Draco wasn't punished at all for casting an Unforgivable either. Maybe DD and SS thought that Harry's spell had been punishment enough for Draco. I guess considering that 'The Chosen One' had been involved, DD and SS decided not to bring in the MOM or the Aurors. IMO, both Draco and Harry should have been punished--- severely. Draco got cut to pieces and nearly bled to death and Harry had to serve a few detentions. Neither punishment seems fitting, imo. Maybe it's because I teach high school; but, I think both boys should have been brought up on charges and expelled, or suspended at the very least. And I do mean at the very least. In the Mugggle world that's what would have happened. Two boys fought; one cast an Unforgivable and the other boy cast a very Dark Spell which nearly killed his opponent. In this fic you have neatly turned the situation completely around and made Draco the one who cast the unknown spell. I think it's right that both Snape and Dumbledore have chastised Draco. In fact he should be more than chastised; he should be severely punished. I wish someone besides Snape had chastised Harry in canon. At that point in canon's story Harry did not respect Snape enough to really care what he thought. Thus, Snape's outrage, his justified outrage at Harry's actions had very little impact on Harry's attitude. I wish DD and McGonagall had both been brought into the picture. That entire episode had me so very worried about Harry. I was worried that Harry was becoming too reckless, too Machiavellian, too Dark in has attitude. Before the scene w/Draco Harry had been just itching to try out this new spell he had found in the Prince's Potion Book. All he knew was that it was a spell "for enemies." I remember thinking that he might try it on McLlaggen. Harry was "spoiling for a fight." I think this might have been Harry's lowest point, morally speaking, in all seven books. Or maybe it was foreshadowing for the way Harry just threw around Unforgivables in DH. I don't know. Now, in this story you have put the shoe on the other foot, so to speak. I'm really interested to see how you handle Draco's punishment. I hope he gets more than a slap on the wrist like Harry in canon. Author's Response: Hi, Anne, thanks for reviewing again, and for your comments...you really make me think about the characters, the plot, and the events I have planned. I'm really so happy that you love the story. It means a lot to me. Authors decide to share their story because they hope that other people will enjoy it and maybe be touched by it. I just wanted to say that reading the reviews that people have been kind enough to leave makes all the effort worthwhile. And it's even better when a reader takes the time to discuss ideas and themes and all in-depth. So thank you very, very much! I do agree with you about Harry and Draco needing some serious consequences for their actions in HBP with regards to the sectumsempra spell. I do think that in real life, such dangerous actions should be severely punished, but I also think there is a history in the HP books of the kids getting away with things that (hopefully) would never be allowed in real life, and I'm not just talking about the life-threatening adventures Harry and friends have because those are pretty integral to the whole existence of the HP universe. But it seems like the students go around hexing one another with little or no provocation and often get away with it, or at least there's not a great deal of official censure. And even though this is not something that caused physical harm, I'm reminded of the time in GoF when so many of the kids wore those buttons mocking Harry (didn't they say "Potter stinks" or something like that?). School officials obviously can't make kids get along or support one another, but for a good portion of the student body to openly mock a kid who's participating in a school function shouldn't be tolerated, and in real life, at least at the schools I attended and later taught at, it wouldn't have been. But I don't recall a single staff member objecting in the book. So I'm just saying, there's a pattern of the kids getting away with a lot, I think. Also, I agree that Snape's reprimand meant nothing to Harry at that point, but whose fault is that? Now, of course, as I said, Harry and Draco both needed some consequences for their actions in regards to that particular incident and DD or MG should have stepped in. But if Harry has no respect for Snape by then, I say it's all Snape's own fault. He's the one who has treated Harry abominably over the years. Eleven-year-old Harry didn't walk into his first Potions class with his mind made up that he was going to act up until he'd turned his Potions professor into a life-long enemy. Snape is the one who did that. From the very first moments of their relationship, Snape singled Harry out and emotionally abused him. You said that Harry using the sectumsempra spell made you worry for him...I think that may have been one of the intentions of that scene, and even more once Harry uses Imperius and Cruciatus in DH. I have even more of a problem with him (and MG) using Unforgivables in that one. I really wish that Harry hadn't used those curses, but I think it was something of a plot device to make readers wonder if Harry would use Avada Kedavra and actually kill Voldemort. And I'm very glad that he did not, that he was able to use Expellerimus (sp?) and have Voldie's own spell backfire. I didn't want Harry to actually have to kill Voldie, even though it would have been self-defense and not really murder, but for Harry's sake I'm glad it worked out the way it did. Anyway, to get back to SC...I actually did plan for Draco to be expelled at first, but on giving it more thought, I realised that 1) I need him at Hogwarts later in the story. 2) Within the context of the story, if Draco were expelled, it's likely there would be some questions raised and the slavery spell needs to be kept quiet. So I decided on something else, and hopefully it won't be a letdown and will be somewhat appropriate. Gotta warn you, though, Draco's not through causing Harry trouble yet. I'm working on Chapter 10 now. In fact, I'm going to go work on it now for a while longer before going to bed. Thanks again!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm just about to that part in Chapter 10, and I can tell you, it's a bear to write...I'm worried about it, actually, but I'm just trying to imagine how horribly awkward it is for both Severus and Harry, and all the hidden feelings that are there, and how both would act and react. Inner turmoil is a good way to describe how both characters are feeling. I hope to finish the chapter by Saturday, but then I'll have to see what my betas think of it, too!
Perhaps you have already made plans for these items in your story??? I was just wondering. I hope you can answer my questions. Looking forward to an update. OMG, I love this story. Author's Response: Hi, you don't have to apologise for reviewing again! You can review a hundred times if you want! *big grin* About the unmentioned items, the Marauders' Map is in Harry's trunk. I didn't mention it simply because it isn't really necessary at Prince Hall, but perhaps I should. And yes, it does have tremendous sentimental value for Harry. To be perfectly honest, I was not thinking that the Gringotts key should also be there (but of course it should). I'll have to mention it soon, I suppose. The key is in Severus' possession. He has put it away for safe-keeping for now. He does not intend to spend any of the money...he actually does think of it as Harry's money still, even though he has the legal right to it now. (Not that he needs it anyway; the Prince fortune is also substantial). I'm going to have Severus talk with Harry about all that pretty soon. He plans to allow Harry a monthly allowance, and then to have access to the vault once Harry is of age. I'm working on the next chapter of "Potions Professor" right now, and hope to finish it by tomorrow. I don't know if I'll be able to post chapter 10 of SC before next weekend, but I'll try! Thanks so much! You all are so wonderful and encouraging. It really means a lot to me!
Well, Snape feels sorry, as he should. Harry feels suicidal. I hope he can get over that. With the love of his LIVING friends I think Harry can get over his depression. I hope Harry gets to spend some extended time with Ron, Hermione, and the other Weasleys. It would be great if Harry and Snape could develop a father-son type relationship. That would certainly help. I wish we could see a scene or two between Snape and Harry interacting. The buildup has very tantalizing. Waiting for some Harry and Snape interaction, post accident. Waiting and waiting..... Author's Response: Thank you! I do see this as a turning point for Harry and Severus, or for Severus, at least. Realising that he's been wrong and feeling remorse for it is the first step towards a better relationship between the two. And Harry really does need to know that he's not alone and is loved and wanted. Unfortunately, Severus isn't quite ready for that yet, and it will be a while Ron, Hermione, etc. appear, so Harry is just going to be very focused on his goal of defeating Voldie for now, because that's in the way of his being reunited with his parents and Sirius. Harry and Sev interaction coming up in chapter 10!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it! Dumbledore will be upset and disappointed, but if he realises that it has opened Severus' eyes to the truth about Harry, I think he'll see that there's a silver lining, anyway. He's been trying for years to make Severus to see the real Harry, and now under the circumstances, it's more important than ever. And the best thing about virtual chocolates, is you never run out, so have all you want!
Its a bizare angle to take, very original not just a new squeeze on an old line- snape sees dudley's, Snape rescue's harry, Snape sees the real harry, Snape Adopts harry, the end- this is genuinely interesting, i can't wait for Harry to explode lol. Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like it!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad things are better at work, too.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'll try!
Author's Response: Thank you! It should be coming up in the next chapter. |
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