Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Title: Encounters 27 Oct 2005 12:13 pm
Reviewer: Jan_AQ (Signed) [Report This]
    Ah, love it so far! He knew he wouldn't really need them; in the end, it would just be him and Voldemort, no one else. That seemed a little off, stating it differently would probably make it more in character. I love the premise, hehe i always love sick Harry scenes. You need to write in somewhere before he's portkeyed away what position he's in though, or add some position movement somewhere because it seemed as if he was lying down on his bed, and then somehow he ended upright and onto his knees. Having one of the order members sit him up in his bed and move his legs to rest on the floor would be enough, or have him land on his bum. XD I really liked how Remus and Tonks arrived together as a team. I like how Harry protested about going to Hogwarts and being at Hogwarts. Everyone seems very in character. As "Lupin" advanced on his, him. As a person who has had many ankle injuries, I found that the decriptions of Harry's injury could have used a little work, but it was good. it got it across right. Your descriptions of his illness and fainting is nicely done. I liked the use of a "stranger".

Disclaimer Charm: Harry Potter and all related works including movie stills belong to J.K. Rowling, Scholastic, Warner Bros, and Bloomsbury. Used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended. No money is being made off of this site. All fanfiction and fanart are the property of the individual writers and artists represented on this site and do not represent the views and opinions of the Webmistress.

Powered by eFiction 3.5