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Reviews For Emotional Commotion
Author's Response: thanks!
Author's Response: i'm trying to crank out the updates as much as possible... i'm just working so many hours at work lately. gotta pay off my hospital and doctor bills. those things are a pain in the butt.
Author's Response: i'm glad about the removal of spells too. i'm also glad that he doesn't look like a carbon copy of severus now. that always kinda bugs me that harry rarely ever looks like a combination of two parents.
I have noticed several places in this and previous chapters where there's a lack of clarity in your dialog. For example: “Calming Draught,” Snape explained. He reached a hand to Harry’s face but Harry flinched back. He noticed then that his face was wet. Had he been crying? He wiped his tears away, roughly. “Sorry,” Harry croaked, embarrassed. It sounds like "He reached" is Snape. If "He noticed" is Harry, it should be on a separate line, because otherwise it sounds like it's Snape, which then makes it sound like Snape is the one who wiped Harry's face, roughly. It doesn't sound like that was the intention. Author's Response: Eek, thanks so much for noticing that mistake of mine. I'll get it fixed up quick. Thank you so very much for your constructive review. I means alot to me.
I'm interested to see how differently things will play out when Harry doesn't go to the Cup. Smart of Snape to keep him from that. He's learning quickly :) Keira Author's Response: *L* It's so funny how different the readers are here and at ffnet. Already I've had a couple of reviewers on ffnet tell me that they think it's too severe of a punishment. ha, it's a totally different world on these two different websites. Harry has been through so much and he's never really been allowed or able to express himself with words and he's never really had someone to go to for help before. It really doesn't seem so out of place that Harry would end up having a habit like that. Let's hope it's just a one time thing that happened because the pot was too dissociative for him. We can hope it doesn't happen again... but only I really know for sure, don't I....? Thanks so much for your review.
Author's Response: thank you for sharing your story. I'm sorry that it took juvi to get your brother to confess. The reason for my all too well description of Harry's experience is because I had tried pot once (last December) because I was sooo curious and nobody would give me a straight answer about how it felt. Mostly my experience was the same as Harry's except I was pretty annoyed from the get-go because I couldn't concentrate enough to read a fanfic that I had been in the middle of. Yeah, my first and biggest pet peeve about the drug was that I was unable to read fanfics. If I can't read, I've wasted a whole night. Everything really went down alot like it did in this story though... right up to that last plataeu (in the next chapter) where the dissasociation became way too much for me to handle. So... just like Harry, I don't 'get it'... I don't understand why people would do this often and for fun. Blech.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm sure Snape will have some sort of reaction if he ever finds out.
Author's Response: Yeah... the Quidditch thing is quite sad... but it's the only punishment I could think of that would fit. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Author's Response: aww shucks. thank you.
Author's Response: oh i will, i promise... well as soon as I am able to. I've got to read DH my first night back and then I have to work... so my first day off of work after my vacation will the update! |
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