Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Reviews For Slave Child
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 10:44 pm
Reviewer: Lunaz (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Snape's awkwardness in dealing with Harry was well done. Like how you showed Harry's sadness. Well done.

    Author's Response: Thank you!  Yep, I think 'awkward' and 'sad' pretty much describe our two boys right now.
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 8:20 pm
Reviewer: sunsethill (Signed) [Report This]
    I don't know quite why, but you manage to bring me to tears every other chapter it seems. I had a lump in my throat through this whole chapter as Severus is so cowed and humble it almost hurts--and Harry can't see it because he is so numb and grieving. I love that Severus gives Harry back his broomstick and cloak. Severus is right--this will say more than anything how sorry Severus is and how he is coming to trust Harry.

    Author's Response: Wow, thank you for that lovely compliment!  You're right; Severus is really wanting to make amends and Harry is in a bad place emotionally right now.  I thought that giving back the Firebolt and cloak would be the right thing to help them on their way at this point.  Both items do mean a lot to Harry for their sentimental value, and he can see that Severus actually did something nice for him, just to make him happy.  So they're slowly moving along, I suppose.  Thanks again!   
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 7:01 pm
Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Excellent story,I like it very much. You did a grat job in not developing it too fast. As for the hinted father-son relationship,be careful with that. I think the mere fact of Harry´s status as slave(even if it becomes more notional with time)makes it very hard if not impossible to have that kind of relation
    However can you maybe explain the nature of the spell a bit more in coming chapters. Like you said that it could punish Harry if he did certain things. when and how would that be? Would Harry somehow be forced to answer Snapes questions if he insisted on it or would the spell interpret requests as orders etc.

    Author's Response:

    Thank you!  I'm trying not to rush things.  I'm not sure exactly what you mean about how Severus and Harry can't be father and son and still live by the dictates of the slavery spell...it may be difficult at first for Harry to see it that way, but I do think they can become a family.  In fact, I imagine that eventually the father/son relationship will be stronger than the slavery spell.  Perhaps not in the sense that that can counter-act the slave spell, but in the sense that they love one another as father and son, and that they realise they would still want to live together and be a family even if the slavery spell is one day lifted.

    The nature of the spell, as I have imagined it, is that there are two things the spell could kill Harry over:  trying to run away or escape, and trying to physically harm Severus.  Someone asked if Harry attempted suicide, would the spell interpret it as him trying to escape, and I said that I believed it possibly could, but I'm not going to have it work that way.  In my mind, the spell does not differentiate between near-death experiences, whether it is accidental, a suicide attempt, or otherwise.  That's simply because I don't want the spell to kill Harry.

    Then I said that he had to live with Severus for 9 months out of the year.  I suppose the year would begin on the day the slavery spell was enacted.  Harry also cannot own property or money.  All his possessions must now be legally owned by Severus.  Of course, though, Severus can let Harry use these things as he wishes.  DD said that if Harry disobeyed this part of the contract, the slavery might punish him through causing some kind of pain.  DD did say that he didn't know for sure if that was how this particular spell would work, but that he did know of some kinds of magical contracts that caused excruciating pain when broken, and that Harry did not want to find out the hard way.

    The last condition was that Harry had to obey Severus, or Severus could punish him as he chose.  The spell itself won't do anything, but Severus could do basically whatever he wanted.  So as for answering Severus' questions, if Harry refused, Severus could punish him if he chose.  But at this point, Severus isn't going to punish Harry, and I'm not going to have the spell hurt Harry either ( or perhaps I should say I'm not going to have the spell punish Harry.  I think he's been hurt enough already.)  The rest of the story is about Harry and Severus bonding, Severus helping Harry to heal and believe that life can be good again.

    Thank you for reviewing, and asking thoughtful questions.  There may be some little technicalities of the spell that don't fit...I imagine people could find issues, such as whether the spell should consider a suicide attempt as an attempt to escape, but I'm going to say that any inconsistencies can be because the spell is so ancient and unheard of, that even DD wasn't absolutely sure about some of the consequences or precisely how it works, though he knows the gist of it.

Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 3:11 pm
Reviewer: dancegirl01mom (Signed) [Report This]
    great chapter!

    Author's Response: Thank you!  Glad you enjoyed it!
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 2:30 pm
Reviewer: NotEvenHere (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Great chapter. Severus is really being quite nice to Harry. I am so glad to see it. And it was really hard to read Severus' POV when he said it looked as though Harry though he would beat him everytime Severus spoke. Wrenching. Hope Harry will not get into mischief with his cloak.

    Author's Response: Thank you!  Severus is really trying, but it will take a while to undo all the damage he's done.  Is it really any wonder that Harry is afraid after all that Sev has said and done to him?  But they'll get there.   And I do actually plan for Harry to be good about the cloak.  He just may need it later on, but not for mischief.  I may be wrong, but I think Harry has mainly used the cloak when he was trying to solve problems and/or help people, not so much that he just deliberately sets out to sneak around and cause trouble with it.  Thanks again!   
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 12:20 pm
Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous) [Report This]
    You let Severus stew so nicely. Well done, there are way too many fanfics where Harry turns all of sudden after one kind world. It is not how psyche of an abused child works. Mila

    Author's Response: Thank you!  I'm really so eager to get ahead to the mushy scenes and let Harry and Severus become all close and loving...you'll never know how  hard it is for me to make myself hold back and go slow...but I do think it would take a little time so I'm trying.  Thanks again!  
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 11:28 am
Reviewer: crazychick84 (Signed) [Report This]
    fabulous to see another chapter, i love the way sev is trying to be nice to harry, its so sweet! i hope they'll be more soon!

    Author's Response: Thank you!  You'd better not let Sev hear you call him 'sweet' though...he'd chop you up for potions ingredients!  *grins* 
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 11:19 am
Reviewer: Cecilia Farrell (Signed) [Report This]
    That was nice, i wonder if the next chapter will be in Harry's perspective? would be quite interesting to see how Harry finds Snape and whether their perceptions match up. :)
    Other than that this was a nice little chapter, can't wait for the action though. Although there's not much action going on physically in this chapter, there's quite a bit emotionally, i like how your building up the relationship between the two. The 'talk' was interesting, who would of thought it, Poppy with her reprimands has made Snape into something closer resembling a father than an evil git of a potions master or a slave master. With those little touches: giving him an allowance, checking up on him getting to know him better aren't really the things that a master would do, but yet there probably not so obviously fatherly that Snape would notice what he's doing is fatherly. (I know that the above is blindingly obvious, but i liked the subtle deliverly of your writing).
    Thanks.
    Cecilia

    Author's Response:

    Thank you!  Yes, I think in the next chapter Harry will begin to wonder about Severus and how he's changed.  I admit, I've never thought writing action scenes was my strong point.  It is a weakness in my writing.  I much prefer angsty and mushy scenes.  I've always said that I could be perfectly happy with a story with no real plot just as long as there was lots of cuddly interaction with my favorite characters.  I do have some action scenes planned, though, but I'm really quite nervous about them, so we'll just have to see how they go.

    Yes, I'm so glad you think Severus is acting 'fatherly' though it's not so obvious as to scare him off.  He sees it as just trying to do the right thing.  I do want Harry and Severus to develop a father/son relationship...that is one way that Sev is going to try to help Harry accept the slavery spell in the future, by emphasising that he sees Harry as his son, not as a slave.  Thanks again!

Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 9:27 am
Reviewer: iluvchocs (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Thanks heaps for the update. I really enjoyed this chapter - slowly but surely, Snape's doing his best to try and become a proper guardian for Harry.

    Author's Response: Thank you!  And yes, that's exactly what's happening!
Title: Chapter 12 20 May 2008 7:45 am
Reviewer: lyra (Signed) [Report This]
    Awww. This was a nice chapter. A turning point perhaps?

    Author's Response:

    Thank you!  Yes, I do think they've reached a turning point, but it will still take a while for Harry to feel comfortable around Severus and be able to see him as someone he can go to for comfort and help.  There are some fairly big turning points, (one was when Severus had to realise that he'd misjudged Harry about the journal and that opened his eyes to the possibility that he'd misjudged Harry in other ways, too), but mostly their relationship is moving along in small steps.  I thought that might seem more real.

    Oh, are you going to write a sequel for "Reading the Signs"?  I thought you said you were, and I loved that story!


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