| Title: To the Infirmary
| 19 Nov 2008 7:15 pm
|
| Reviewer: Madison (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
I really liked this story..great start...can't wait for the next chapter!
You have completely changed points of view twice, right in the middle of the chapter with no warning. First it's third person, then suddenly, for no apparent reason and without break or warning, it's Snape's 1st person point of view, then toward the end of the chapter it's back to third person with no warning. You clearly need to proofread your work.
Otherwise, it's an interesting idea.
| Title: To the Infirmary
| 19 Nov 2008 6:20 pm
|
| Reviewer: Deco (Anonymous)
| [Report This]
|
Well, this is something different...a nice change from the usual baby...
|