Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Reviews For Broken Wings
Title: Vigil 27 Mar 2009 12:49 am
Reviewer: Wyrsa (Signed) [Report This]
    Chapter left me with very warm feeling. And I'm very glad for your happy experience!
    Maybe too many details in scene of Eileen's death, and Snape - to my taste, mind - got too sentimental, (though he simply might be tired). Ah, mushy but so right - that's what we all feel about our little faithful friends. I just fear to imagine Severus emotions, when he understands (or learns other way) that he've put such feelings in no other than Harry Potter.
    Thanks for sharing and good luck!

    Author's Response: Yes, he is tired, and can't help reflecting on what he ahs lost, it's always nerve wracking when an animal is sick.  And Severus is going to be shocked and embarrassed and horrified to learn who he saved and in a way who has saved him later on.
Title: Vigil 27 Mar 2009 12:37 am
Reviewer: DrSnape (Signed) [Report This]
    beautiful! I really like the way you made Snape so angry and Crabbe have a conscience here. I've never seen crabbe like that before and I like it. I loved how you showed why Snape is afraid to admit he loves anyone, the part with his mom dying was so sad. I also like the way you gave both persepctives Hawk-harry and Snape.

    Punishments--have them clean the whole owlery without magic and take away Hogsmeade and their parents should know what they've done too--stealing and hurting their Head's familiar is not funny.

    Author's Response: Thanks, I like that idea as well and am glad you're enjoying my story.  I wanted to give Severus a reason why he's so cautious and all, I'm glad it makes sense. 
Title: Vigil 27 Mar 2009 12:23 am
Reviewer: Aethyr (Signed) [Report This]
    Greetings, Snapegirl:

    You had once reviewed my work and asked that I review one of yours in return -- and here I am. Thus far, your reviews have been nothing but glowing; let me spare you the syrup and tender some criticisms. To wit:

    Your rendition of Snape seems to have slightly less control of his emotions than he ought. At this point in time, he should know better than to allow himself any psychological vulnerability; he gets so uncharacteristically attached to the bird in this chapter! I am inclined to think that he would have turned any injured animal, even one he identified with, over to Hagrid, childhood dreams be damned. He of all people would know better than to indulge in dreams, poor soul. I'm not 100% convinced by the premise. Show me that he considers Hagrid (no "Hagrid's too clumsy for hawks"; the later chapters shred that conception to bits). Show me his self-justification when he makes the most uncharacteristic decision to bring it home.

    On the subject of Hagrid, Snape caves much too easily to Hagrid's rationale regarding Harry. I understand that he and Hagrid have a sort of mentoring relationship; I should think that Hagrid would have tried for years to persuade him to come round. Why does he begin to give in now? I buy the premise that Harry's mental state has taken a sudden turn south, but not that it would necessarily trigger a revelation as Hagrid seems to believe. Snape would hate to admit he was wrong, for one. There should be more of a mental struggle, methinks, between what are essentially two competing worldviews.

    More of a practical concern: how does Draco manage to break into a storeroom keyed to Snape's own magical signature? Snape, after all, should have no problem protecting his space against a few schoolboys.

    I shall endeavor to think up some appropriate punishments.

    I hope this helps, and that I have not excessively ruffled your feathers. You are always welcome to leave me scathing reviews yourself.

    Pax vobiscum,
    Aethyr

    Author's Response:

    I appreciate your views, as they remind me to bring up a few things to clarify certain points. 

    First I'll take the debate with Hagrid over Harry--Severus isn't totally sold on Hagrid's theory yet.  He still has reservations over the kid, but the specter of possible suicide makes hims et them aside . . .for now.  As a former attempted, and a teacher, Severus cannot ignore Hagrid's insistence that Harry is depressed, he knows what went on in the graveyard and knows the pressures of the tournament, and he trusts Hagrid when he says something might not be right with the boy . . .after all the man saw that he was suicidal at that age too and nobody else did.  Hagrid's instincts are good, so Snape accepts the possibility that Harry is very depressed and maybe even suicidal, God help him if he ignored it and the kid died . . .that outcome actually happened when I was in middle school, one of my classmates killed himself, he was 14, and the teacher suspected something but never followed up and to this day has never forgiven herself.  It was a tragedy.    And as a former teacher, I know that teachers HAVE to take even suspected attempts seriously and follow up and mention them to counselers and principals, and I'm sure it's the same in Britain too.  So Sev isn't going to blow off  Hagrid.  But there will be plenty of arguments between the two concenring Harry as the story progresses and Harry remains among the missing.  Like I said, Severus still thinks Harry is a chronic troublemaker and lives to drive him insane. 

    Draco's entering the potions lab wasn't too unremarkable, though Severus normally locks the door, but he was in too much of a hurry and forgot.  And he figured no student would be dumb enough to test his wards and actually steal from him personally, especially one of his own House, so yes, he's regretting that too.  Sev's magical wards only extend to his quarters in regards to his signature, not the potions lab, since he holds class there. 

    Lastly with regards to Sev and the hawk bonding, I know Severus just throws caution to the wind here and allows his emotions to dictate his actions, and that's a deliberate action here.  Rationally he KNOWS it's not a good idea for him to adopt this injured animal, not while he has to serve Snake-Head, but he cannot help himself.  That's his weakness, everyone has one, even super controlled spies who pride themselves on their logical behavior like Snape.  He knows he should allow Hagrid to take care of the bird, that will be brought up next chapter, and yet he finds he cannot bring himself to do so.  The hawk gives him something he needs--companionship--and his saving its life creates a kind of bond between them that's terribly hard to just shrug off, when you've held a creature in your arms and fought for its life, it changes you forever.  Snape, at least in my opinion, is not as hard as he thinks he is, and though he won't admit it to anyone except Hagrid, he badly needs a friend, though he will be horrified when he finds out just who he befriended later on . . .very much so! Though eventually he will come to accept it. 

     

    Hope this answers your questions. 

Title: Vigil 27 Mar 2009 12:12 am
Reviewer: RhiannanT (Signed) [Report This]
    Hmm....Hang them upside down by their feet!! Punishment fits the crime, right?

    LOL I don't think even Snape would do that, though. Ummm....forced to help Hagrid with animal care for a month?? I dunno. I do think that Crabbe should come off better than the other two, though. He at least came back and tried to fix things.

    Author's Response:

    It does, but it IS a bit extreme, LOL! Voldy would do it, though!

    I agree about Crabbe, he at least showed compassion, which Snape does realize even though he's furious.  Thanks!

Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 10:44 pm
Reviewer: Elfwyn (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Fantastic story. I like this Hagrid and Snape so long as Severus doesn't turn into a brute when he finds out who the hawk is!

    As for the Slytherins, one would think that magical parents had a way to punish kids aside from spankings or time out, but not something physically harmful or permanent. Perhaps empathy spells or suppression of their magic for a time. Draco should lose this place on the quidditch team. Loss of Hogsmeade privileged too. After all this is not only stealing, but stealing from their Head of House and getting caught!

    Author's Response:

    Severus will be very shocked and angry at first but after what will happen as the story goes on, he won't be too horrible to harry once he calms down.

    I'd agree, they probably do, except I think the teachers aren't allowed to use magic to punish students, which is why they assign detentions without magic.  But losing privlieges is good and yes, they really screwed up big time! 

     

Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 9:52 pm
Reviewer: SageKiller (Signed) [Report This]
    Awesome chapter, I feel so sad for Snape! At least his hawk won't leave him like that...at least I hope not.

    I think the boys punishment should be meaningful, teach them a lesson. Maybe something that would deprive them of their privacy? Like having to sleep in the common room instead of their dorm, or something like that. And because it's Snape of course they have to scrub a bunch of cauldrons anyway haha

    Author's Response:

    I know, me too! He hardly ever catches a break, excpet now he will, until Harry changes back and then things will get . . .angsty.

    Good ideas for punishments and yes, there is always that good old standby. Thanks for reviewing.

Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 9:26 pm
Reviewer: CraftyMomChick (Signed) [Report This]
    once again, Snapegirl, you have written a wonderful story. The interaction between Snape and the hawk is so wonderful I keep wishing that he knew it was Harry. As for Draco and co. I think they should have to clean out the owlry and should the owls use them for target practice, all the better!

    Author's Response: ha, that's really funny1 And it could happen too! And one day Snape will discover the truth and perhaps change his mind about Harry.  Glad to see you're reviewing!
Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 9:26 pm
Reviewer: Judy (Signed) [Report This]
    I cried. It was so very moving, there at the end. And I just had a cat die on me, so I know how it feels to lose an animal or a loved one.

    The beginning was scary though, I could practically FEEl his rage. I'd have been running, all right.

    As for a punishment, I've been reading a story on colonial Virginia and back then they punished thieves by branding them with a T on their thumb or cheek for a first offense, second, they hung them, anyway, what about casting a spell on the boys that makes a T appear on their forehead, in brilliant glowing orange or something and making them walk about like that for a week? It'd be humiliating, because then everyone would know just what they did to get dtention and whatever else Severus dishes out, since that's not enough. Personally, i think Malfoy would absolutely hate being humiliated, he's not used to it. Update again soon!

    Author's Response:

    Aww, I'm so sorry! I hate it when animals die, my own or someone else's.  My condolences.  If it makes you feel better read "The Rainbow Bridge" it's an anonymous poem and it's something my vet gave me after my cat died and it really helped me through grieving for her.  You can find it on the web.

    So would I, believe me. Running to hide under the bed!

    That's a very unique punishment, thanks for telling me! I don't know if Sev wants it publically known that they stole from him, however, but humilation would serve Draco right.

Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 9:22 pm
Reviewer: Mervoparkite (Signed) [Report This]
    WONDREFUL CHAPTER!! Please tell me those boys spent the entire night in utter terror, unable to sleep, scared witless!

    Now, for proper punishment. . . hmm, Can't be something too public--Snape wouldn't do that to his reputation. What could he do? What about having the boys learn something about proper bird care by completely cleaning out the owlry--without magic and maybe with at toothbrush?--for hurting our beloved hawk. For the Intrusion and theft from Sev's private stores--the three are the permanent potion testers in class for the rest of the term--especailly Longbottom's potions? Finally for the pivacy issue, Require the boys to take a truth serium (veriasirium or not) in the Slytherin common room for a specified lentgh of time and anyone can ask questions? Too Harsh?

    Or, what about assigning them to be labor for Hagrid for the rest of the year?

    More soon please!

    Author's Response:

    They did, how did you guess?

    Probably because that's what you or I would be doing if faced with the wrath of a certain Potions Master, right?

    That's right, Snape wouldn't want to advertise that three members of his own House just ripped him off, forgot about that.  I like the Owlery thing, some others have suggested that too, and the potion testers sound good, except I'm wondering if Severus could get in trouble for doing it? And the truth serum sounds good in theory, but I think the Ministry would have poor Sev's hide for giving such things to students, I remember reading that giving Veritaserum to minors was forbidden legally, though Umbridge breaks that rule once she's in charge of the school.  Still, Albus is still in charge right now and he wouldn't like it. But it's still a good idea, maybe I could do it in a slightly different way, like with a Babbling Beverage? And working for Hagrid is good too. 

Title: Vigil 26 Mar 2009 9:03 pm
Reviewer: hawkswench (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Yeah tissue was needed, I have been though a couple of pets like that and unfortunately a couple of them didn't make it. As far as punishment, maybe cleaning the owlery with buckets of water (which they have to haul muggle style) and scrub brushes?

    Author's Response: Aww, that's too bad, though I've had a few die on me too and was totally wrecked afterward.  Yes, that's a good idea, Draco especially needs to learn to get his hands dirty.

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