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Reviews For Lily's Charm: Legacy
Author's Response: LOL I am rather pleased to hear that actually. :oP I am sorry I am slow as molasses. I am working along on it though; just very slowly as I've started a new story and it's taking all of my attention. I'll get cracking though... I don't want too many irritated junkies.
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You are such a good writer, Tabitha!
We don't know what Tabitha has planned. Oh, and this is the THIRD time I write such a review for a story where a writer assumes that they know the plot of the whole story, and has written it off before giving it a chance. I'm very quickly losing patience with reviewers who don't give a thought to the fact their thougtless reviews might make a writer question whether they want to continue writing their story!!! I must admit that it seems to be mostly reviewers that haven't written anything themselves, or they would understand what such reviews do to a writer's self-esteem. Okay, so now to point out the obvious. Tabitha has already informed us in the chapter notes that this is not some fluffy story where there is action at every corner. This is a story about life, about Harry and Severus' relationship and about Harry's internal struggles as he steps over the threshold to manhood. I would much rather read about a story with mature themes like these, than a story where there is one action scene after another, but underneath, not much substance. I tell you one thing, it is much harder for a writer to write a story like this. It takes true talent for a writer to keep your interest throughout the story when there are not a lot action scenes. It's a true testament to Tabitha's talent that she is not resorting to that ploy to keep the reader's interest, but she is continuing on with the themes that she had plotted out for her story from the beginning. Keep your vision Tabitha, and don't let others make you falter, or make you think about changing this beautiful story, or worse yet, stop writing it altogether.
Harry keeps allowing himself to be provoked. If he has learned anything from Severus over the years, it should be how to resist. The reporters continue to come after him because he gives them what they want in the end. This sequence was very realistic. As much as I enjoyed finally reading this latest chapter, I was in the end rather disappointed. It had some of the same flavor of the HBP movie: the secondary elements done very well, but the main substance missing. The quidditch practice session, the supporting characters like August, the ordinary interactions between Severus and Harry were all excellent and satisfying to read, but there seems to be little propelling the plot forward. For that matter, I am no longer sure what the plot is supposed to be exactly. It is as if we are simply spending time in the company of friends, with no particular focus or direction. This may be fine in real life, but can become frustrating in a story. Is this meant to be essentially a relationship story, showing how Harry, Ginny, Ron, Hermione, and Severus sort themselves out, with some help or hindrance from August, Draco, Remus, etc? While that type of story is not my preference, it can be interesting if there is some depth of interaction, some greater personal issues or broader external context coming into play. So far, however, the main characters have been grappling with little more than what the average teenager faces: sexual responsibility, relationship breakup, misunderstandings between friends, balancing school/work/activities, starting to outgrow parental authority. It is hard to tell even that they are who they are: young people who, in their short lives, have endured extraordinary situations and made heroic contributions. I would expect this to come through in sometimes unexpected ways in even the most casual and mundane interactions. The only sign of this here is the reporters’ intrusion on the Cannons’ practice. (Severus' kissing Harry at the end also made me cringe, but then my view of him has been slightly different than yours, even accounting for his non-canon backround in LC.) On rereading, I realize this review comes across as rather negative. I am not sure how better to express my thoughts, though, and prefer to be candid, as always. I am still looking forward to the next chapter.
So just because I love your stories so much I was re reading a bit of The gift (Serious loser re reading fanfiction) and I had kinda forgotten how cute Ginny and Harry and in it So please please work out there relationship just a little bit I'm pouting and giving you puppy dog eyes Really cute last couple lines on this chapter I'm also starting to warm up to August I thought he was going to be a huge jerk Keep up the good work
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