Potions and Snitches
Snape and Harry Gen Fanfiction Archive

Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 4:06 pm
Reviewer: thedeejay (Signed) [Report This]
    Woah! I've been waiting for it to reach this point! Can't wait for the next chapter!!!! Well done!

    Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far, and sorry for the suspense. Personally, I like a lot of drama. But don't worry, I'll update really soon!
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 2:39 pm
Reviewer: Phoenix1 (Signed) [Report This]
    No I don't like cliffhangers- nobody does they drive us crazy!! (Stomped my foot) Please give us the next chapter soon...

    Author's Response: Sorry about the angst, but don't worry, I'll update soon!!
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 1:27 pm
Reviewer: cammy (Anonymous) [Report This]
    great chapter and - oh boy - what a mean, mean cliffy!!! Hope you update soon.

    Author's Response: Thanks! And don't worry, I tend to update fast when I have ideas floating around everywhere.
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 12:54 pm
Reviewer: Liz (Anonymous) [Report This]
    Yeah! That's a chapter for which I was waiting so long... We have evil Vernon and good Petunia. Not so bad, I think. I'm waiting for more chappies.

    Author's Response: Thank you!! And thanks for sticking with me for so long!lol
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 11:53 am
Reviewer: Raven Knight (Signed) [Report This]
    Wow, Vernon is such a jerk! So, if Severus and Lily both remember and have this painful emotion or feeling about Petunia's house...there has to be more of a reason why there. Were they both there before? (I mean, I would think at least Lily would have been there before, but why would Severus be getting those powerful emotions connected to the house, particularly Harry's room?) Poor Lily, being now concerned with her own death, after her husband died and not to mention that always proble-causing prophecy. I really thoroughly enjoy your portrayal of Petunia. She seems so much more human than (dare I say it?) the canon universe! She seems to be a force to be reckoned with big time when it comes to her sister. The box idea is very cool. That thing would be quite handy...I almost want one. A question I am rather curious about is whether or not James knew about all of this or not, and if he would be paranoid for Lily's safety since she mentioned she couldn't have left while James was there? And the whopper: Did James know heis not the father, if Petunia's bomb shell of a cliffhanger is the truth? (I have every faith that she is telling the truth, and if that is the case, did James know?) *snort* Loved how Severus goes for the blunt approach to get through Harry's "dense mind." Haha! I have that problem with my own peers! Interesting description of Severus's physical stature, a thin, athleticly fit and powerful figure. I pictured him practically dwarfing Harry as he stood, even while being injured. And Severus's determination to not be weak is so something that that character would exhibit. The man would definitely not accept even the notion of help from anyone. Nice. Although, I was curious that you chose to somewhat ignore your previous bit about the stairs here. Was it that he was so determined to get down them, that he was not feeling his anxiety about actually going down them? Or was he just being so stubborn in his refusal for aid, that his determination of not revealing his weakness and lack of strength to Harry overruled that fear of stairs? And there you go once again, tying the two raven-haired males here together by Harry knowing how Severus must feel about some things, especially the not wanting to feel weak thing. Haha! "Potter the Stunningly Imbecilic!" Haha! I love your Snape-ism nicknames for Harry. Soemtimes cruel but so sarcastically funny! And another interesting thing, that almost for a split second (or if you squint closely) makes Severus seem almost paternal: recognizing/inspecting/discussing the signs of abuse on Harry's cheek. The poor man already suffered that from his own father, so it would be natural for him to not wish it on any other child, especially when it comes from within the family. He's another force to be reckoned with. Go Petunia, for literally knocking some life back into this man! I knew she was a force to be reckoned with! And BAM! did she deliver! Go Petunia! But don't get Severus angry because things will explode apparently. Oh dear, hope they all clean that up before Vernon finds it. Aww, Harry trying to stick up for James. Little wizard, this is too much for you, and the adults are angry...wait for that bombshell, cause it's coming in the next few seconds. And there's the big secret! It's out, everyone! Is it time to reveal to Severus and Harry the contents of that box Lily gave her? I hope so! Because it would be very interesting!

    Again, only a few little things here in terms of typos. "Nodding numbly, Petunia stared at all of the belonging Lily had brought and listened intently..." THe word 'belonging' needs to be plural, especially since she brought multiple things (either way, it's belongings). After Petunia's and Lily's hug: "Picking up her heavily little boy, Petunia watched with worried..." Change to "heavy." Right after Snape tells Harry to "grow a brain for Merlin's sake!": "Ah. So that's why Harry had hated him so much. Funny that he had actually started to forget." This confused me a bit. Was "Harry" supposed to be "Snape" or am I just slightly mental right now, considering the sun is rising where I'm at and I have yet to sleep? Just confused on that sentence... Next paragraph: "'I could,' the man drawled. 'But then again, I think you owned me after all the times...'" The word "owned" should be "owed." When Harry says, "...Aunt Petunia put it away. I'm not exactly where their at." Since robes are pluralized, "it" should become "them," you are missing "sure" in the next sentence to make "...not exactly sure...," and "their" needs to be changed to "they're." They get into the kitchen: "..."Harry opened the door to the kitchen for the wizard and then pulled out a chair for him to sit it." It should be "in." Harry gives the water to Severus: "As expected, Petunia hit them under the stairs..." The word "hit" should be "hid." Petunia walks into the kitchen: "...nephew looking down at the tile floor silently, why the looming black presence of Severus sat in a chair." Change "why" to "while." Another one: "When Severus looked at her, just the barest hint of dislike on his sever features..." I believe you meant "severe" not "sever." Right after the smack, where you mention his temper being "at it's peak," the it's should not have an apostraphe, because it is not a contraction of "it is," but the possessive "its." Harry backs away from a fuming Snape, realizing he had never saw Snape so mad before, "Not even when Sirius had gotten way before the end of term." add an a on way for "away." Sorry, if this seems rather nit-picky, but I get annoyed when I myself make typos (there are probably a whole ton of them in this review!) and no one tells me, so I try to inform others when they are making some slight errors. And really, that's all you have going are slight errors. Which is great! So, if this gets annoying to you, let me know, and I will stop and only focus on plot devices and things like that for some criticism. But, I'm just trying to help out a fellow Slytherin.

    Looking forward to more. So jealous of your writing speed. It's almost sickening how fast you update, but I get beyond excited every time, because you are doing a wonderful job fleshing out these characters. Keep up the good work!

    Author's Response:

    No! I like your help!! I do actually get annoyed with little mistakes myself! And sometimes, like I said before, I just let my fingers go where they wanna go, so THANK YOU for helping this poor little beginning writer!

    Now, about Snape and the stairs: I guess it didn't come out the way I had wanted it to becuase I was trying to have Snape still have his paranoia and that's actually why he was breathing so heavy when he had Harry got to the top of the stairs. True, he was tired, but it was his phobia that was getting in the way. So when Harry offered to help, he snapped at him, but the disgust on his face was more towards the fact that HE couldn't even go down the stairs and Harry picked up on it. His wanting to go first with several steps in between was because he thought he'd be out of Harry's reach and therefore couldn't get pushed down. Sorry, I should have explained that a bit better, and since I knew what I wanted to say, I assumed (incorrectly) that everyone would know what I wanted to say. So sorry about that.

    But I'm uber thrilled that you're enjoying this so far!! It helps when everyone respondes in such a positive way!! Thanks for reviewing, and I hope I won't disappoint! Thanks again Slytherin buddy!! (I know, I can be very lame!)

Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 11:26 am
Reviewer: mithrilandtj (Signed) [Report This]
    Gah! Blasted cliffies!!!

    Author's Response: Teehee! Don't worry, the next chapter's on way!!
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 10:38 am
Reviewer: EllaEleniel (Signed) [Report This]
    Nice cliffhanger. I can't wait to find out their reactions. I like how you shift between years. It gives the reader a unique, intimate reading experience by not having to hear about the past through other people.

    Author's Response: Thank you very much! ^^ I always like it when you get to read about the past while it's the present at the time. (Does that make sense?) I always think it's less comfusing then when you have someone else explaining it. Glad you like it!!
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 8:40 am
Reviewer: JL Evans (Signed) [Report This]
    Brilliant cliffhanger

    Author's Response: Thank you!!
Title: Chapter 8: Revelation 30 Jul 2009 7:28 am
Reviewer: Fairner (Signed) [Report This]
    woot go Tuny! :3 Drop it all at once!! lol

    Author's Response: lol Thanks for the review!!
Title: Chapter 7: Waking Up 30 Jul 2009 3:36 am
Reviewer: Fairner (Signed) [Report This]
    Hedwig is cute =)
    Poor Severus >_< EVIL Tobias! Rawrs!

    Author's Response: Teehee! Thanks for the review!!

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