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Reviews For Longing to Belong
I really, really liked it. Are you sure this is your first story? The emotions were amazing, the chapter was long, Snape managed to stay in character and yet be helpful when Harry was in a time of need and Draco is perfect! Thanks so much for sharing! I give you a ten! ^_^ Please update real soon? Author's Response: Thank you! I rewrote this a half dozen times before I felt comfortable sharing it, I hope it continues to be pleasing. I should have an update soon!
My one suggestion would be to get a beta. You have some typos in here that dampen the quality of the fic and they'd be easy fixes. There are tons of betas on P&S--I think you should find one and take advantage of someone who is willing to help you make this into a real piece of art. Very nice work--I look forward to reading more. -P.G. Author's Response: Thank you! I will definitely look for a beta, thanks for the suggestion.
Author's Response: Thank you!
This is a really good start! I can't wait to read more. At times it did seem that Harry was opening up to quickly to Snape and I had to reminded myself that he had been there a while. It might help if you remind the readers more that Harry has been there for awhile already. Granted I don't know whats in the next chapter, but perhaps a paragraph elaborating on how he got there would help. Or add a sentence or two here and there giving a specific time? For example when Severus is going over the rules with them Harry mentions that its the third time he's heard them. Perhaps say its the third time in two weeks or something like that. I love how you portray Draco. He's still sort of 'evil' yet he's changing sides and you capture that really well. This sounds like it will be a great story and I'm eagerly awaiting an update. Author's Response: Thank you. I plan on revealing some of the back story in chapters 2 and 3. I'm glad you like it!
Author's Response: Thank you! |
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