Hey,
I really liked this! I have to admit that I hesitated at first, but this was so different from everything I've read that I wanted to try it out.
I really grew to love Toby and I felt bad for him at times when it seemed as if Harry didn't take enough care of him. But he usually came around again and he's still learning how to be a parent so I suppose I can't hold it against him. I liked the way you made him more responsible because he wanted to be a good parent and idol for Toby!
I also liked the way you wrote Snape, how he slowly and grudgingly came to respect and even like Harry. How he was continually surprised by Harry and had to change his opinion. Well done!
I'm looking forward to more of this and Snape finally finding out about Toby. And, obviously, finding out if Harry really is his son and what this ominous memory of Lily's that Irma protects contains.
Just one little negative comment: Do you have a beta-reader? Because sometimes, your sentences don't completely match up and there's word missing and such. I would offer my help, by English is not my first language and I don't have a lot of free-time right now. I just thought it might be helpful.
But anyway, I'll sure read the next chapters and enjoy them!
Thank you for writing,
ai
Ooooh! I can't wait to see what happens next! Please update soon! Please?
What about the paternity potion(s)?
I really liked when Toby interrupted Harry's musing to get into the bathroom. He is such a fun kid. I always enjoy reading about Toby. Snape has a good son and I am looking forward to the chapter when they can get to know each other.
| Title: As the Father Sleeps
| 15 Apr 2012 1:33 pm
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| Reviewer: Elena (Signed)
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"Severus Snape is awake." Ta ta ta taaan!
God, this story is so catching I can't wait for the next chapter. I should have been a book so I could have read it whole in a day without stopping even to eat!
| Title: As the Father Sleeps
| 14 Apr 2012 11:26 pm
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| Reviewer: Fmh (Signed)
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I love how you are keeping us in suspense thank you. Irma is very good as a complex character but I'm confused does Severus know who she is?
What a place to end! This chapter was fabulous and I can't wait to read more. Please update again soon, I look forward to the next chapter!
I really loved this chapter, although Irma's willing herself to forget and then having instincts about Harry did seem a bit out there. Still, I loved the flashbacks about Severus, and Harry's introspection, and just everything. I also can't wait for the next chapter!
oh no more please soon sevs awake!
Love the chapter. Especially finding the cat and the flashbacks. I wonder what'll happen next?
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