| Title: Chapter 5: Diagon Alley & Unexpected Surprises
| 27 Feb 2013 1:46 am
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| Reviewer: Slee9 (Anonymous)
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This story is filled with an unnecessary amount of description. I tried to read it because the plot was good but grew bored. "smug smile of knowing"... really? Smug. That's it, that was all you needed. I hope you realise that big words, or long paragraphs don't ,necesarily, improve the content. Vary your sentence structure and trim the fat!
| Title: Chapter 5: Diagon Alley & Unexpected Surprises
| 27 Jan 2013 3:28 pm
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| Reviewer: Lady Destiny (Signed)
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Aww, Harry' s first crush. How sweet :)
Please update again soon, I can't wait to read more!
| Title: Chapter 5: Diagon Alley & Unexpected Surprises
| 25 Jan 2013 7:39 pm
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| Reviewer: Ann Jinn (Signed)
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So much is new and Saturn has such a short time to make adjustments to everything.
I like the job you are doing with the relationships, i.e. Severus taking time from his potions to talk to him and hug him.
It is going to be a difficult adjustment and there have been some horrible betrayals to overcome. Dumbles better have a good story for this, including the murder of the young witch.
Absolutely wicked chapter! Luna was great. I hope we get to see more of Saturn with his parents in the future. Particularly with Sev. I look forward to seeing what Saturn inherited from the wizard!
| Title: Chapter 5: Diagon Alley & Unexpected Surprises
| 25 Jan 2013 5:52 am
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| Reviewer: Mervoparkite (Signed)
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I believe I have said this before, but I will say it again-you have a gift for painting beautiful images with your words. From the early morning in the book stacks to the rain - amazing. I shall be interested in how the relationship between Draco and Saturn matures. It's all to new and kind and sweet at the moment (although I would expect nothing less!) I am sure there will be some "welcome to the real world" types of bumps along the way.
And you have LUNA!! I love Luna and look forward to more of her presence in the future!
Thanks for the update.
V.
| Title: Chapter 5: Diagon Alley & Unexpected Surprises
| 25 Jan 2013 5:26 am
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| Reviewer: Outlawgal (Signed)
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I was looking for updates and I was hoping your was updated and I looked and bam there it was and putting a smile on my face.
Dumbledore better not mess things up if he does I will be really mad at him (not your writing its just part of the story....and he is rather good at it...unfortunatly)
Saturns wand sounds lovely and the core is a really cool idea.
I love his reaction to nature and it was sad when the tree was hit and he felt it.
My question from last chapter about Draco being an elf or not was answered thank you.
I LOVE LUNA and his reaction to her priceless. I loved how she always knows people and who they are or their bloodline with just a glance.
I see a future romance in the making?
Again Awsome chapter and I am so ready for another chapter and wait with excitment.
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