Terrific premise to your story, and great chapter. I wish Harry had restrained himself, but I’m looking forward to seeing how this all plays out.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I’m glad you enjoyed! I’m still struggling writing Harry at the moment. I wanted to include a bit more of the sassy Harry we get from the books as well as him just being very childlike and typical 11 year old boy who goes back and forth from being sweet and kind to cheeky and brash in a blink
So Harry goes in the water... great chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you!
| Title: Chapter One
| 21 Jul 2019 7:07 pm
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| Reviewer: Fmh (Signed)
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Very good description of a merman and a very good confrontation I think you have got Draco and his goons down to a T. Thank you for updating
Author's Response: Thank you! Great to hear that my character writing is doing okay! I’m always afraid that I’m not doing them justice, but it’s a relief to hear that I’ve managed to write Draco decently and not too OTT. thank you for reviewing again!
Can't see why you didn't like this chapter. I thought it moved the story along nicely and, of course, it stopped at a most interesting moment!
Author's Response: Oh, thank you! I guess we are our own worst enemy when it comes to criticism sometimes, I’m still trying to develop a relationship with how I write. I’m glad you enjoyed this chapter, and thank you for taking a moment to review it!
Noooo! Poor Harry. Of course Draco probably doesn't know Harry can't swim. I really liked using Draco as the antagonist. It makes the scene similar to what Snape had to go through, being outnumbered, and bullied. Good development of plot and movement in the story line. I liked how Draco was a bully, but multidimensional. I picked up how it hinted where his bullying ways came from, parroting what another likely said to him...an adult probably his father to Draco, and to house elves. Thanks for the update!
Author's Response: Thank you! I’m glad my efforts to make a similar parallel between Harry and Snape’s experience with bullying by the lake didn’t go unnoticed- although I only noticed it myself as I was writing it! Yes! I always felt that a lot of Draco’s behaviour in the books/films was due to having learnt things from the people he grew up around. Thank you for reviewing! Hopefully a new chapter will be on the way soon!
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