Title: Just Another Brick in the Wall
| 30 Sep 2021 3:34 pm
|
Reviewer: Fmh (Signed)
| [Report This]
|
What a cruel Severus! Thank you an excellent chapter.
Title: Just Another Brick in the Wall
| 18 Jan 2008 8:06 am
|
Reviewer: Malora (Signed)
| [Report This]
|
I love the little descriptive words and phrases you've placed in your story. From the dungeon walls to the bowl of broth, you have little touches that make the story more vivid in my mind's eye. Like when "Harry hurled the creamy, white bowl into the dungeon wall. The unfinished broth trailed down the uneven surface."
However, Snape runs a little too hot and cold. I realize he has a quick temper, but there were times when the change happened too quickly. There was one point where he "shoved the bowl of broth into Harry’s hands and set the cup of mint tea gently on the floor," and the switch from angry to kind was too fast and jarring for me.
Anyway, I'm enjoying this story very much. I like the creepy flashbacks and the air of mystery surrounding them. Thank you for sharing your story!
|