Summer 1967

34 Spinner's End, London

"Severus! Get your skinny arse down here NOW, boy!" roared the eight-year-olds drunken father.

Gulping back a sob, the boy hastened down the stairs, praying that his father was not quite as drunk as usual, for it was a fact that the drunker Tobias was, the meaner he got, and the quicker he was to lash out at his son, or wife, or anyone who happened to come within range of his hand. Still, he knew better than to ignore his father when he called for him. He'd made that mistake once when he was five, and he still bore the scars on his backside for that little bit of rebelliousness.

He was older now, and wiser, he knew better than to bait the demon that called himself Tobias Snape. He knew not to cry in front of his father, no matter how much the older Snape walloped him, and he knew that when his father was passed out drunk was the best time to scamper off to the park and play with Lily Evans, his best friend. His mother Eileen worked long hours and was rarely home, so it fell to Severus to cater to Tobias's demands and cook breakfast and lunch, if they had anything to cook that day, that is. Sometimes all they had to eat was bread and butter or maybe that and a hard lump of cheese. Once in a great while they had eggs and milk, and Sev could make scrambled eggs and toast, and if his mum had managed to put a bit of her pay aside, they'd get bacon or ham and have a feast while Tobias was down at the tavern, drinking and playing cards.

As soon as Severus's head peered over the banister, Tobias scowled and beckoned the child over with a finger.

Sev approached warily, wondering if he were going to be hit for something. But this time his father did not raise his hand to him. "Here. Take this and go buy me a bottle at Pete's," ordered the man, handing the boy a handful of shillings. He was unshaven and his eyes were bloodshot, his dark hair was lank and greasy, and his blue shirt had stains on it from booze and old food. Usually, Tobias would grab a bite to eat at the pub, if he could drag himself away from the tables or the bar, like he'd done last night, leaving Eileen and Sev to enjoy a meal in peace.

Severus pocketed the money, concealing a sneer as he did so. That money should have gone to buy him new shoes or some food, but instead it would be poured down his bum of a parent's throat. Same as always. Then he recalled something and said softly, "But Dad, Pete said last time that he'd not sell you anymore gin ‘til you paid your tab."

Tobias glared at his son warningly. "Never y'mind, kid! Jus' do as I say. I made an arrangement with Pete, now get goin' and look sharp!" he aimed a cuff at Sev's head, which the boy dodged neatly.

Severus knew better than to linger, and scampered quickly out the door and down the cracked sidewalk to the local pub, called Pete's Pirate Haven. At least that was what the sign said, but the locals just called it Pete's. The sign was half lit and bore a skull and crossbones on it and two cutlasses.

Severus was a familiar sight in the pub, so the few men at the bar or seated at one of the tables barely gave the eight-year-old a glance. They all knew he was here for Tobias's afternoon fix.

Severus hopped up on a bar stool and plunked the money down on the well worn but lovingly polished wooden countertop. Sal, the bartender, looked up from where he was drawing a pint and gave the scrawny child a smile. "The usual, Sev?"

"Yeah, Sal."

The bartender, who was in his mid-forties, took half the money and handed Severus a brown paper bag. Inside it was a bottle of cheap gin, Tobias's usual poison. He then slipped Severus the rest of the money, plus a chocolate bar, a package of pretzels, and a can of soda.

Severus smiled and gave the bartender a thumbs-up sign in thanks. Sal always gave him something when he worked and Sev came to pick up Tobias's bottle, and he never charged full price for it either, unlike Mike and Joe, the other two bartenders. But Sev could never acknowledge that Sal was doing so, or else the man would be sacked by Pete, who didn't believe in charity.

"Tell your dad there's a game on tonight," Sal informed the child.

Severus nodded. "Poker or cards?"

"Poker. Medium stakes."

"All right. Gotta go, else I'll catch it."

Sal lifted a hand in a wave as the boy slid down from the stool and raced out the door, shaking his head sadly. Sev was by no means the only kid he saw in here fetching booze for his old man, but there was something about the slender boy that touched the bartender profoundly. Maybe it was the way the boy's dark eyes still contained a mixture of hope and innocence, despite the harsh hand life had dealt him. Severus Snape was plenty smart, he could be somebody if he ever got the chance to leave Spinner's End. Sal prayed he'd get the chance, for he didn't want to see Sev end up like so many others, thugs and thieves and bounders, crushed by poverty.

Severus would have been astonished if he knew he inspired such feelings in the bartender, the boy tended to think he was beneath the notice of most adults, like he was with his father. He ran home as fast as he could, gave Tobias the bottle and a shot glass and told him about the poker game.

"Good. I could use a few quid," grunted the man. "Now beat it, kid. Take your ugly mug outta my sight, you're makin' me sick."

"Yessir," Sev turned to go, but not quick enough to avoid his father's hand, which landed hard on his backside.

He bit his lip, for the smack had hurt, but he said nothing and scampered away, blinking back tears. Stupid, Sev! You know better than to move before he's taken the first shot, he scolded himself as he slipped out the front door. Once out of his father's sight, he rubbed away the sting in his behind and wiped away the tears that had gathered in his eyes.

Then he went towards the park, and waited beside the swings, which was his and Lily's usual meeting place. She was already there, dressed in her usual blue jeans and colorful tie-dye shirt, her red-gold hair pulled carelessly back from her heart-shaped face. Her green eyes were sparkling with mischief.

"Hey, Sev. Been keepin'?"

"Uh-huh. Where's your sister?" He hated Petunia and was always wary when the older girl accompanied Lily to the park.

"Cleaning the bathrooms," Lily answered, smirking. "She got in trouble for telling off my mum, and now she's got to clean the house. So we don't have to worry about her spying on us. Did you get it?"

Severus nodded. "Yeah, but let's go to the rock."

The rock was their special place, a flat topped boulder half screened by a stand of poplars on the left side of the park. They played King Arthur and the Knights of the Roundtable there or Hogwarts or any one of a dozen other make-believe situations. Both Lily and Sev had incredible imaginations and they read constantly, and often play acted scenes in books they'd read or watched on TV.

Once they'd reached the rock and made sure there were no nosy children lurking about, Sev slipped the book he'd borrowed from Eileen's lab from under his shirt and handed it to Lily. It was called Beginning Potion Making by Allie Asphodel. Eileen had told him once that this was a very basic book that introduced a child to the art of brewing potions.

Together the two began to read the magical text, their heads together, dark and light. When they had read the first chapter, which told how to gather ingredients for a Color Change Potion, Lily looked up and said, "I wish your mum didn't work so late all the time, Sev. Then she could teach us more about potions."

Her friend sighed. "Yeah. She said she might be able to show us a little on Friday, since it's her day off. But we have to wait until he's gone, ‘cause if he catches us doing magic, he'll go bonkers."

Tobias was adamant that Eileen not corrupt his son with any of that "hocus-pocus crap", and he forbid Severus to learn anything about magic or wizards. "I want a normal kid, not a flaming freak," he was always saying. Severus had learned early on to never to mention the word magic around Tobias, for that was the quickest way to earn a whipping, and Tobias was most unforgiving with the belt when he caught Sev talking about magic.

Lily cast her friend a sympathetic glance. "Why'd he marry your mum then, if he doesn't like magic?"

Severus shrugged. "Dunno. He's an ass."

"Why doesn't she divorce him then?"

"Who knows?" sighed the boy, brushing his hair out of his eyes. "Wish she would. Then I wouldn't need to hide all the time. I wish . . ." he trailed off, blinking rapidly.

"What do you wish, Sev?"

"That I had a different father," answered her friend, very softly. "One who loved me. Instead I get the drunken bastard from hell." His dark eyes flashed. "Someday when I'm older and I can do magic on my own, I'm gonna hex him into next week. Then he'll see what it means to mess with a wizard."

Lily stared at him, wide-eyed. "Would you really hex your own dad?"

Severus nodded. "Sure. In a blinking minute, Lil. Why? Don't you think he deserves it?"

"Of course, but won't you get in big trouble, Sev? You told me you're not allowed to use magic outside of school."

The little boy scowled. "I know, but maybe it'd be worth it. I'd love to give him a jackass's head, or make boils come out all over him, or make him so sick he wished he was dead."

"Your mum wouldn't like it. She'd be mad."

"I know. That's why I'd never do it. But oh, how I'd like to!"

Lily nodded, her green eyes bright with compassion. "I'm glad you wouldn't, Sev. ‘Cause I'd hate for you to be arrested. But I'd visit you in jail though," she added impishly.

"They don't get visitors in Azkaban, Lily."

"How come?"

"'Cause of the dementors," whispered Severus.

"What's that?"

"They're, uh, the guards that patrol Azkaban. They're like spirits or something, they look like black ghosts and they make people go insane by sucking out all the happiness from them. And if you're found guilty in a wizard trial, they can be told to perform the Kiss on you."

"The Kiss? That doesn't sound so bad."

"It's awful. My mum said the dementor takes off its hood and feeds off your soul until you're dead." Severus told her, a shiver of fear running down his backbone.

Lily shivered too. "Ugh! Sounds wicked and creepy. Do they ever come out of Azkaban?"

"No. Least I don't think they do."

"Thank God," Lily gasped in relief, glancing about quickly, goosebumps on her arms.

Severus nodded, though secretly he wished one would come over to Spinner's End and suck out Tobias's soul, so then they'd be free of him. Then he shook his head, for that death was too dreadful even for Tobias. If only his father could be made to understand about magic, the way Lily's parents did. They were Muggles too, but they didn't treat their kid like a piece of trash or call her freak and beat her for inheriting magic.

He turned back to the potions text and began reading the second chapter aloud to Lily. By the time they were done with that, it was almost dinner time and they could hear Petunia calling Lily in her screechy annoying voice.

Lily groaned and handed Sev back the book. "Darn it! Just when it was getting interesting too. I gotta go, Sev, before she comes over here and sees you. Same time tomorrow?"

"Yeah." He made no move to get down off the rock. He would stay here until he was certain Tobias was no longer in the vicinity, then sneak home and eat whatever they had in the pantry.

"I'll be here," Lily reassured him. "Always."

He grinned shyly at her. She was one of the few constants in his life. "Bye, Lil."

"See you, Sev!" Then she was gone, skipping down the path to where her bossy older sister waited.

Severus watched her go, then took out the pretzels and chocolate and soda and began to eat them. He wished he'd remembered them earlier, so he could have shared them with Lily. Still, they made a good dinner, though he knew his mother would have frowned at him eating so much sweets. He resumed reading the potions book, trying to absorb as much as possible before he returned the book to its place on the shelf that night.

There were many things about his life he wished he could change, but one thing he didn't, and that was his friendship with Lily. She was always there for him, and he was very grateful for that. And he always would be.

* * * * * *

"I spent much of my childhood ducking and hiding from my drunken father, who never managed to crawl out of the bottle he fell into," Severus told his son quietly. "He made my childhood hell, but no matter how many times he hit me, he never quite managed to knock the sarcasm out of me, and I never stopped wishing that one day he would stop hating me and start loving me, the way other fathers did their sons. That wish never came true. I feared and hated that man, but I also wanted his approval. I never got it, but that didn't stop me from longing for it. Much the same way as you wanted the approval of your aunt and uncle, Harry."

"I never got it either," murmured the younger wizard.

"I know. The one thing that made my childhood bearable was my friendship with Lily. Well, that and my mother, who always loved me, no matter what. By the time we received our Hogwarts letters, Lily and I were inseparable. We swore a pact to always be friends, no matter what." Snape smiled sadly, then continued. "Little did we know, our friendship would be tested sorely during school. . .

* * * * * *

September, 1970

Hogwarts Express

"C'mon, Lily, let's sit here. It's empty," cried Sev, beckoning his best friend over to the empty compartment. Both of them were first-years, and were eager to begin their schooling at Hogwarts, where they could finally learn magic openly, without fear of being beaten (in Severus's case) or made fun of by jealous older sisters (in Lily's case).

The two quickly sat down on the comfortable leather seats and grinned happily. They could hardly believe they were finally going to Hogwarts, they way they'd dreamed for so long. Both of them were dressed in brand new black school robes, and Severus had a new pair of trousers and a green pullover for once, Eileen had managed to hide away enough money to get her son new clothes for the start of the term, though everything else had been bought secondhand. Sev didn't mind, all he cared about was finally going to school, away from his father's hand, which had been particularly heavy last night, when he'd learned that his son hadn't burned the letter the way he'd been told to, and was still going to that freak school.

Eileen had put some magical salve on the worst of the welts, so at least he could sit down without his backside hurting like blazes, and Lily wouldn't notice. His own magic had taken care of the bruises on his face, he'd always been able to heal himself a little, his mother said he got that talent from his grandfather, Gavin Prince, whom Severus had only seen a handful of times before he had died.

Severus had his old school trunk, though Eileen had charmed the nameplate with Severus's initials, STS, instead of his grandfather's GSP, which stood for Gavin Severus Prince. Severus was proud he was named for his grandfather and happy that he had the trunk, which was kind of like a family heirloom of sorts. It was a bit scuffed about the edges, but Eileen had polished the brass nameplate and rubbed some kind of cream into the green leather trim that made it shiny.

"That's a real nice trunk, Sev," remarked Lily as he slid it beneath the seat. Her own trunk was a shiny rosewood and her initials were scripted in bright gold leaf-LAE (Lily Ann Evans).

"It was my grandpa's," Severus told her, as he sat down gingerly on the seat opposite her. Most of the students were already on the train, and they could hear them walking and chattering down the aisle. "He left it to me before he passed away. He was a wizard too, like Mum and me, he was a specialist at St. Mungos, he helped heal people from spell damage there."

"Neat!" Lily said. "So you've got a doctor and a Potions Mistress in your family, Sev."

And let's not forget the drunken bum, Severus added darkly to himself, shifting slightly on the seat. Then he resolved to quit thinking about his father. He wouldn't have to worry about him until summer, a whole blessed nine months. "Right. And you've got an engineer and a librarian in yours." Henry Evans was an engineer and his wife Iris was a librarian.

"Let's not forget good old annoying Pinch-Faced Petunia," Lily giggled.

Severus snickered. "Yeah, every family needs a villain."

"What House do you want to be Sorted into, Sev?"

"Well, my mum was a Ravenclaw, so I wouldn't mind being in that House. You've got to be really smart to get in there though."

"Which you are."

"So are you, Lil."

"Not half as brilliant as you, Sev. I wouldn't mind being in Ravenclaw either. What House was your grandpa in?"

"He was in Slytherin. That's the House that's known best for its ambition, cunning, and resourcefulness."

"Not to mention its dark wizards," put in a boy's voice from the door of the compartment. "Slytherin is as dark as they come and you'd be a fool to want to be Sorted into that slimy House."

Lily and Severus jerked up to see two boys standing in the doorway of the compartment. Both of them looked to be about their age, eleven, though there the similarities ended. One of them had extremely messy brown hair and wire-rimmed glasses, and his robes were extremely good quality, embroidered with a family crest of a stag.

The other boy was equally well dressed and was quite good looking with black hair and gray eyes, he was eyeing the two of them with a look of faint disapproval.

Severus bristled, not liking either of them. "Who asked you?" he growled. "Mind your own business."

"You gonna make me, snake lover?" sneered the handsome boy. "I couldn't help but overhear what you were saying to this pretty chick here, and you've got some nerve telling her Slytherin is a good House to be in. Everyone knows that was the House You-Know-Who came out of, and all the Dark Wizards who supported him."

"So? That doesn't mean all of them were bad. My grandpa was in Slytherin, and he was no dark wizard!" Sev told him, his dark eyes flashing.

"He probably was, only you never knew it," laughed the boy with the glasses.

"Shut your face!" Severus cried, his temper igniting. "You don't know what you're talking about. My grandpa was not a dark wizard, and I'll knock your teeth out if you say he was."

"Ooo, now I'm scared!" laughed the other boy. "Sirius, d'you hear this? The little pipsqueak is threatening us. Better run along home to mummy, slimeball, before we teach you what it means to mess with a Marauder."

"A Marauder?" Lily glared at them. "What's that, like a gang? What are you, some kind of criminals? I'll bet you've got a rap sheet as long as my arm. Now get out of here and go bother someone else."

"Why, doll, that's no way to talk," drawled the messy-haired boy. "We got nothing against you, just your snake loving scummy friend here. My name's James Potter." He held out a hand. "And this here's my mate, Sirius Black. The Marauders is the name of our club. Care to join it?"

Lily gave him a look of utter disgust, ignoring his hand. "No thanks. Any club that has you as a member isn't one I want to belong to, Potter."

"What? You're turning me down and you're willing to be friends with that slimy snake instead?" James cried, pointing at Severus.

"Don't call him that!" Lily shouted, her green eyes blazing. "His name's Severus Snape and I'd rather be friends with him than you, you stuck-up snot, any day of the week."

"Severus?" snickered the other boy, Sirius. "What kind of name is that? Sounds like it ought to be Snivellus instead. Snivellus Snape the Slytherin lover!"

"Stick it up your arse, Black!" Severus snarled, clenching his fist. "Slytherin was a great wizard, and so was most every wizard ever to come out of his House."

"Oh sure they were," sneered Sirius. "Great at dark magic. Everyone knows the best House is Gryffindor, the House of the Lion. Courage will win over cunning any time."

"If that's true, then God only knows what House they'll put you in," Lily said angrily. "Because you aren't courageous, ambitious, or smart, from what I can see. And Hufflepuffs are known for their kindness, and you're both nasty buggers."

"Maybe they'll invent a House just for them," drawled Severus. "A House of Arrogant Idiots, with the peacock as their symbol."

"Shut up, Snivellus!" shouted Sirius. He took a step forward, one fist clenched.

"Make me, Black," Severus challenged, lifting his own fists. "Or are you all talk and no guts, pretty boy?"

Sirius threw a right hook at Severus's face, but the other dodged it neatly, despite not having enough room to maneuver in the compartment. He was used to that, and Black had nothing on Tobias for speed and power.

Then Severus launched a punch of his own, and his fist connected with Sirius's nose.

Shocked, the other boy stumbled backwards, banging into James, who brought up his wand and started to say a hex.

Only to drop his wand an instant later when Lily kicked him hard in the shin.

"Ow! Hey, no fair, doll!" He backed away, unwilling to hurt a girl.

"I'm not your doll, Potter! The name's Lily Evans. Get out of here! Now!"

James held up his hands. "Okay! Okay! I'm going. Don't get your knickers in a twist, Evans." He backed out of the compartment, picking up his wand on the way. "Merlin, she's got some temper. Must be that red hair." He said to Sirius, who was trying to stem the blood from his nose. "She's a looker though."

He reached out and dragged Sirius out after him.

"Right, mate, but she's hanging around with pond slime. She must be Muggleborn, doesn't know any better. Got a handkerchief, James? That bloody Snivellus made me get blood on my fifty Galleon shirt. Mum's gonna kill me," muttered Sirius. "Just wait, I'll get that little creep back if it's the last thing I do."

"You and me both, mate," grumbled James, and they headed back down the corridor, floating their trunks after them.

"Good riddance!" huffed Lily as they departed. "I hope I don't end up in the same House as them, the arrogant prats!"

"You won't," Severus assured her. "They're sure to be in Gryffindor, they're all brawn and no brains. Pureblood idiots." He sat back down. "You were brilliant though, Lil, kicking that ass Potter that way."

She laughed. "You weren't bad yourself, Sev, you taught that git Black a good lesson. Serves him right." Then she sighed. "Although this wasn't quite the way I'd intended to start the year, by making enemies instead of friends."

"They started it," Severus reminded her. "By barging in where they weren't wanted."

"I know, Sev." Lily soothed, putting a hand on his arm. "But I'd rather not have to worry about you watching your back, know what I mean?"

"I can take care of myself, Lily," said Severus stiffly. "I'm not afraid of them."

"I know you aren't. You're not afraid of much, Snape," Lily said.

Severus merely smirked quietly, for she was right. The only thing he really feared was his father. Well, that and losing Lily. But that would never happen. They had sworn a pact to be friends forever, and Lily had promised she'd always be there for him, and he'd promised the same.

Just then there came a knock at the door and a soft voice said, "Excuse me, but mind if I sit with you? I got on late and there's hardly any room left."

Both children gazed warily up at the newcomer. He was a rather skinny boy with a shock of blond hair and bright dark eyes. His robes looked worn and his skin was slightly pale looking. His trunk was rather battered as well. He held out a hand, smiling cautiously. "Hi. My name's Remus. Remus Lupin."

Severus took his hand. "Severus Snape. Come on in." He moved over to allow the other boy a seat.

"Hello. I'm Lily Evans. Pleased to meet you, Remus."

Remus shook her hand too. "You're both first years, right?" They nodded. "Me too. What House d'you want to be Sorted into?"

Severus eyed him warily. "Why? What House d'you want to be sorted into?"

Remus shrugged. "Whatever one will have me, I guess. I don't care. I'm lucky I'm going to school at all."

"Oh? Why do you say that?" asked Lily curiously.

"Cause I . . .um . . .have chronic fatigue and I missed a lot of school before," Remus said awkwardly. "So I was lucky Headmaster Dumbledore agreed to overlook my, um, condition." He blushed. "Anyway, what House d'you want to get into?"

"Ravenclaw or Slytherin," answered Severus.

"Okay. How about you, Lily?"

"Any House that the two imbeciles we met before aren't in," she answered.

"Who are you talking about?"

"Their names are James Potter and Sirius Black and they call themselves the Marauders . . ." Lily explained.

They spent the rest of the train ride talking with their new friend, Remus Lupin, who was a pureblood, but had no attitude like Potter and Black had. All of them hoped they'd be Sorted into the same House.

* * * * * *

"But that wasn't to be, unfortunately," continued Severus. "As you know, I was Sorted into Slytherin and they were Sorted into Gryffindor, along with James and Black. But Lily swore that nothing would come between us and our friendship, no matter if our Houses were rivals. She kept that promise. So did Remus. Potter and Black became my rivals, and we fought like crazy, in and out of class, and they were later joined by Peter Pettigrew, the little rat."

"Why do you call him that?"

"Because he was one, literally. His Animagus form was a rat."

"What's an Animagus?"

"A wizard or witch who can transform into a specific animal. It's a very rare gift, and not all wizards or witches can master it. The animal you become is determined largely by your inner spirit, or so Minerva always tells her students. Her Animagus form is a cat, as I'm sure you've guessed. The Marauders were all unregistered Animagi. James was a stag, Black was a dog, and not a purebred either, he was a large black mutt, and Pettigrew was a rat. Remus was, as you know, a werewolf." Severus explained.

"When did Remus become a Marauder? I thought you said he was your friend."

"He is. He didn't join Potter's little club until the end of third year, which was when they discovered that he was a werewolf. He never gave me all the details on how that occurred, but those three were always poking their noses where they didn't belong, minding everyone's business. They hated mysteries and secrets, and Remus disappearing every month right around the full moon was too tantalizing for them to ignore." Severus scowled. "When they found out Remus's secret, he made them promise they'd never tell anyone, for werewolves were persona non grata in our society, feared and hated. James, in turn, made Remus a Marauder, and dragged him along on their escapades.

"Remus told me later that he went along with them for the most part so he could make sure they didn't get too carried away with their little jokes, some of which were harmless, but others were downright cruel and obnoxious. Sometimes it worked and other times it didn't. Black, especially, was a vicious prankster if you got on his bad side, and I did. He and Potter and Pettigrew, who was a coward through and through, don't ask me how he ever ended up in Gryffindor, ambushed me routinely and hexed me three on one."

Harry looked surprised. "They sound sort of like my cousin Dudley and his gang. Dudley used to stalk me when we were in school and out of it, him and his four friends, waiting until they could beat me up or whatever. They called it Harry Hunting," his son recalled with a grimace. "Only they didn't have magic, so it probably wasn't as bad as what you went through."

His father shook his head. "Magical or not, bullies are always trouble. How many times did they beat you up before you managed to learn to avoid them, son?"

Harry winced. "Too many times. But I learned a lot from them about hiding and escaping. I was smaller than they were, and I could go places they couldn't, like on the roof and up tall trees and inside rubbish bins and cabinets. Eventually I got so good at disappearing, I think my magic helped me sometimes, that they got tired of hunting me and left me alone. They haven't tried to hurt me since I started Hogwarts. After Hagrid gave Dudders a pig tail, he practically wets himself if I point at him and say some made up gibberish," chuckled Harry, his green eyes sparkling. "He's scared to death I'll magic him into a pig or something for real, the big idiot! And so are my aunt and uncle." Then he looked imploringly at his father. "Tell me more about what happened to you and Mum at school, please? It's better than a novel."

"I'd hope so. It's reality," Severus said with a snort. "By the end of first year, I was at daggers drawn with Potter, Black, and Pettigrew, who was their toady, he followed them about and did whatever they said. Pathetic lump!" Snape sneered. "But Lily, Remus, and I continued to see each other outside of school, it turned out that Remus lived quite near us and he used to fly his broom over and meet us in the park on weekends. Neither of us knew he was a werewolf, however, we accepted his explanation of chronic fatigue and didn't bother to question him further.

"It wasn't until the end of third year that I began to suspect differently, but when I told Lily, she said to let it be, that Remus would tell us if my suspicions were correct on his own and if not, I didn't have the right to pry. She was right, and so I waited for Remus to tell me himself. I had plenty of secrets of my own, the last thing I wanted was to try and snoop about looking for secrets from my best friend.

"I had enough of my own problems, both at school, thanks to Potter and Black and some members of my own House, who didn't approve of my friendship with Lily and Remus, and at home. My parents were arguing more than ever, and my bastard father was starting to hit my mother now as well as me. I tried to stop him a few times, but without magic I was no match for him, he outweighed me by a good stone or so and he was stronger than I was too. I always ended up worst in those little fights. It got so bad that I started spending some weekends over Remus's house or Lily's even."

"Did they know?"

"Yes, but I never came right out and told them. But Lily figured it out long before, she'd seen me once before I'd had a chance to heal myself of the bruises he left on my face and arms, and she knew he was a drunk who lost his job and spent all his time down at the pub, gambling and drinking while my mother worked her fingers off and I went to school. There were plenty of times I couldn't sit down right either, and I used to invent excuses so she wouldn't suspect. Not that it worked. She wasn't stupid and neither was Remus. It wasn't that hard to put two and two together and get four. Lily used to say I ought to call the police and have him arrested and believe me, that was a dream of mine."

Snape shifted slightly on the bed, relaxing his legs. "But I never did, because a part of me knew it'd be worse for my mum and me if I involved authorities. They couldn't know about magic and that was one of the main reasons my father beat me. Then too, I was ashamed of what he did and what I let him do, and I didn't want to admit that to an adult. I still had my pride, it was the only thing I owned that wasn't in tatters. So I kept my mouth shut, figuring that was best, after all I'd been enduring Tobias for years and I was still alive. I was miserable, but I was breathing.

"Thank Merlin and God for Lily and Remus, because they were there for me when I needed them most, especially Lily. She always seemed to know when I needed her, and she was always waiting for me at my house or the park. If I believed in all that Divination rubbish Trelawney's always spouting, I'd have said she was a Seer. Either that or she knew me better than I knew myself."

Harry said softly, "In the letter she wrote to me, she said you were her, uh, soulmate."

Severus smiled sadly. "And so I was. That was why it hurt so much when she was killed. The Old Meddler didn't lie when he said her death nearly destroyed me. I was depressed and close to suicidal for weeks, but Remus, Albus, and Poppy pulled me out of it. Poppy knew everything about my terrible childhood, I confessed all to her when I was made her apprentice Healer in fifth year."

"Sounds like you were really busy your fifth year," Harry remarked.

"Merlin's starry hat, was I ever! I had OWL's to study for, that's advanced level wizard tests, the Marauders to avoid, and secret meetings with Lily to arrange after classes. At that time, the sentiment against Muggleborns was running high due to Voldemort's influence, and several pureblood children, future Death Eaters, were targeting them. Most of them were in my House and I spied on them so I could protect Lily from the worst of them. I wasn't well liked in my House because I refused to treat Lily like dirt and was friends with Remus too. I got threats nearly every week from certain Housemates and that's when your mum and I started meeting in secret. It was while I was waiting for her to meet me down by the lake that I stumbled upon the Marauders sneaking away off the grounds, on the night of the full moon. I couldn't resist the opportunity to get them in trouble, I was a prefect then, and so I followed them. . . ."