St. Mungo's Hospital, London, England, May 1998

Severus had faced many terrifying things in his life, but he couldn't remember ever being as afraid as he was now, standing in the hospital hallway, staring at the closed door to Harry Potter's room.

He was being ridiculous. It wasn't as if the boy were going to attack him. Indeed, if what the Healers had told him were true, Harry wouldn't respond to him at all. It had been three days since the final battle, three days since Harry had learned of his friends' deaths and since that time he had not spoken or responded to anyone. He seemed to have retreated completely into his own world. The Healers called it ‘a dissociative reaction to grief and shock'. Severus thought that the boy's heart and spirit had been broken and that he had given up on life.

It had also been three days since Severus had returned from the afterlife...if it had truly happened at all and had not been some strange hallucination. As soon as he had stated his willingness to return, everything around him had faded to black and when he had opened his eyes, he had been lying in a bed in the Hogwarts infirmary, with his neck bandaged, and with Minerva McGonagall, Filius Flitwick, and Pomona Sprout sitting beside him.

As soon as he had awoken, they had fallen on him with remorseful apologies...Pomona had sobbed aloud, to Severus' alarm...and with explanations.

The battle had apparently ended some hours earlier and when Minerva had gone to the headmaster's office, Albus' portrait had explained to her that Severus had been on their side all along, that he had followed Albus' orders and had been continuing with his spying duties all through that long last horrible year. The portrait had also given her instructions on where to find a vial filled with Albus' memories, memories that would exonerate Severus when viewed in a Pensieve.

Always sensible, Minerva had promptly summoned Kingsley Shacklebolt and the two of them had watched the images in Albus' Pensieve together. So when Severus had been discovered, lying unconscious in the Shrieking Shack a short time later, Shacklebolt had declared him innocent and he had been taken to the infirmary to be tended to, rather than banished to a holding cell to await trial.

"We can never tell you how sorry we are, Severus," Minerva had sounded tearful herself and her eyes were unusually bright. "We should have known."

Severus had tried to wave a hand in dismissal and had noted with surprise how weak he was. "Doesn't matter," he had said, his voice a raspy whisper. "Pot...Harry, where is he?"

The three of them had stared blankly at him. Finally Minerva had managed to say, "Harry? You're asking for Harry?"

If he had not been so weak, Severus could have made any number of caustic remarks at their dim-wittedness. But all he had been able to do had been to give a slight nod.

It had been one of the rare times that Minerva had looked unsettled. "Harry is at St. Mungo's. He himself is not injured. At least I don't believe he had any serious injuries, but..." and then her voice had choked and tears had begun streaming down her cheeks. Pomona Sprout had begun sobbing again, and it had been Filius who had had to finish.

"Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger were killed in the battle, Severus," the tiny professor had told him, his own voice filled with grief. "When Harry found out, he seemed to go into shock and Poppy felt that it would be best to take him to St. Mungo's where Mind-Healers could care for him. Hagrid is staying with him."

Despite the weakness, Severus had immediately tried to get up, only to collapse back onto the pillows even before the other three professors could move to stop him.

"Severus!" Minerva had reproved sharply. "What are you doing? You have lost a tremendous amount of blood and you need to rest."

"Harry...need...go to him," Severus had tried to explain, hating the frailty that sapped his strength and kept him bed-ridden. He had come back to this place to be with Harry and damn it, he wanted to go to him.

"You're not going anywhere just yet, Severus Snape," Minerva had replied sternly. "Poppy would have our heads if we let you out of bed in this condition. You're to rest and take blood-replenisher every four hours. Then we'll see how you're doing tomorrow."

Sheer frustration had given Severus strength and he had glared fiercely at her. "Need to be...with Harry...it is...important."

Filius had patted his arm. "Severus, Harry is likely unconscious. It has been a long hard day and I imagine that the Healers have given him a sedative to help him sleep. You need to rest as well. You can see Harry tomorrow."

But Severus hadn't been able to go to St. Mungo's the next day either. Poppy had finally released him that next afternoon, but Kingsley Shacklebolt and several other Aurors had been waiting for him. Shacklebolt might have declared him innocent, but the Wizengamot had still wanted to hear the explanations from Severus himself.

So Severus had spent the next two days meeting with the council of barristers and Aurors, answering their endless questions, but in the end, it had been worthwhile. He had been completely exonerated and found innocent of all charges.

Legally, anyway.

And now it was the third day. Severus had left the Ministry and gone straight to St. Mungo's. He had spoken with Healers about Harry's condition, and now, finally he was ready to begin his new mission in life: to care for Harry and to give him a reason to live again.

But to do that, he would have to see Harry and speak with him, and all of sudden, Severus was terrified. He had always prided himself on his courage. He had fearlessly faced Voldemort, Death Eaters, and classrooms of clumsy adolescents. Nothing had ever frightened him as much as the sight of the closed door leading into Harry's room.

Because when he entered and went to Harry, he would have to admit how wrong he'd been. He would have to apologise and ask for forgiveness. He would have to ask for another chance, one that he knew he did not deserve. He would have to leave himself open and vulnerable to rejection. Because of course Harry would reject him. What had Severus been thinking to have imagined that he and Harry Potter could ever have any kind of amicable relationship?

Scenes from the past flitted through Severus' mind with lightning speed...cruel jibes he had spoken, his towering rage when he had caught the boy in his Pensieve, Harry chasing after him the night Albus had died with his face twisted with uncharacteristic hate.

Severus almost turned and left. How could he and Harry ever get past that? Of course Harry would reject him, and then what was Severus supposed to do? Say, "Well, I'm very sorry, but Fate has apparently decreed otherwise and since I've come back from the dead, you shall have to make the best of it?"

Harry would think he was crazy. Perhaps he was crazy. But he had come here to be with Harry, to try to start over.

Severus took a deep breath and opened the door.