-II-

"I will speak with your headmaster, but maybe you should ask her first if she would even like to come," Light Arrow said thoughtfully.

Draco nodded again and nervously looked down at the messenger in his hands. "Can you write to her?" Draco asked Severus hopefully.

"I think you can manage quite well alone."

Draco sighed, settled down more comfortably and started writing.

Hermione,

I'm sorry I didn't write lately.

I was very busy and had to think about a lot of things.

Light Arrow says you could come over for a few days or weeks if you like.

Would you like?

Draco

Nervously, he gnawed at his bottom lip and let his finger hover over the send button. Eventually he let his finger hammer on the send button. His guts gurgled again when the letters disappeared from the screen. Hermione was reading his message.

-II-

Harry was busy checking his cupboard for the third time. It was clean and all his clothes were neatly arranged and piled. He wanted White Cloud to be happy about his room. She should find everything to her satisfaction. Harry was a bit worried though. Black Hawk had said she would check very closely. So he checked for dust on his cupboard again. He had learned to clean very thoroughly during his life with his relatives, and so he was sure it was all clean, but Aunt Petunia always had found a mistake. Harry hoped White Cloud wouldn't find one. He didn't even dare to sit down on his bed.

The bed was neatly done. The sheet didn't have any creases, and the bedclothes lay very neatly folded on the bed. Nervously Harry wrung his hands and waited for White Cloud to come and inspect his room.

Finally White Cloud emerged in the doorway. "You should make yourself ready for your talk with Light Arrow, Harry. Your turn is in a few minutes."

"I'm done. Everything is all right," Harry said and gestured with his hand through his room.

White Cloud looked a bit puzzled, but came in and looked around.

"I'm impressed. I wish all the boys would clean their rooms so thoroughly."

Now it was Harry's turn to look puzzled. "You didn't look in my cupboard or under my bed and..." Seeing White Clouds surprised expression, he stopped.

"Your cupboard? It's your private area. Why would I want to look into it?"

"But Black Hawk said..." He stopped, finally realizing that Black Hawk had played a trick on him; either to distract him from thinking about his talk with Light Arrow or just out of fun. Or maybe even both.

"What did Black Hawk say?" White Cloud asked, dying to know what her most troublesome son and prankster had said to Harry to make him clean his room like this.

"Nothing," Harry said, sighing about his stupidity to believe Black Hawk about this. He should have known better, being here for almost three months without White Cloud making any room inspections.

"Do you like grilled cheese?"

"Grilled cheese?"

"Black Hawk loves it, but we seldom get it. I was going to make one for the next barbecue, and I could give it to you for cleaning your room so well." White Cloud's eyes twinkled with mischief, and finally Harry got the meaning of it. Oh yes, that would teach Black Hawk to prank him like this.

/

OF COURSE I WOULD LIKE TO COME! I still need to ask Professor Dumbledore, but because Light Arrow said it would be okay, he will certainly let me come.

So you are okay? What happened? Have you been mad at me? Did I say something wrong?

Love,

Hermione

Draco groaned. "Question after question."

Severus chuckled. "That's the Miss Granger I know."

"She says she has to ask Dumbledore, but she would love to come."

"Then I will contact your headmaster now," Light Arrow said. "And one more thing before you leave, Draco. You know you need to speak about what happened in the dungeons or you will never heal completely and live a normal life."

Draco sighed. "I know, but I need more time, Light Arrow."

"You know that Red Horse had similar experiences?" Light Arrow asked carefully.

Draco stiffened. "I guessed."

"He is willing to speak with you about it. Maybe it would be easier to speak with him, not that I will stop trying to talk about it in our sessions. It could help you to talk with Red Horse about the rape before you speak about it with me or Rose."

"I'll think about it," Draco promised, his mind overblown by the sudden confirmation about his assumptions about Red Horse. Maybe it would really be easier to speak with the calm and gentle Red Horse about it.

/

"Sit down, Harry," Light Arrow said while Severus still sat in one of the armchairs and Black Hawk made himself comfortable on the couch opposite to him. "Please tell us about your week."

Harry was uncertain what Light Arrow expected from him. "Ehm... it was okay?"

"Okay? I heard a lot has changed in your life."

Harry blushed under the watchful eyes of the old man. "I... You mean Melissa?" He looked over to Black Hawk, trying to read his expression, unsuccessfully.

"That's one of the things I want to speak with you about. Another is Aiden. Have you thought about your reaction to his bullying? Did you speak with Black Hawk about it? Especially about what would have been a much better solution than hiding it from us?"

Harry's face fell. The problems with Aiden were solved for him. The conversation with Black Hawk about it felt like a month passed; even though it just was a week. "Professor Karley also spoke with me about it, and I had a long talk with Black Hawk. I know I shouldn't have hidden it and shouldn't have told Mel to not talk about it as well. It won't happen again."

"What did Isaac say about it?" Light Arrow asked curious. He considered Isaac as one of his sons, but the vampire avoided being in the camp too often or interfering in the problems of the children. Maybe he had seen something in Harry's mind that made him interfere. Light Arrow mentally made a note to invite the vampire over more strictly for the next barbecue. This time he wouldn't let him sneak out of it.

"He said I wasn't concentrating and that my confusing thoughts about Aiden and Melissa were hurting his head. He insisted that I talked with him about it before we went on with the lessons."

"And?"

Harry blushed. "You don't want to know what he said."

"I'm very certain I want to know, Harry."

Harry sighed and felt the heat on his face become even worse. "He said I should ignore Black Hawk and wait until the one-to-one is over to make a go for Melissa. Please don't refuse to end my one-to-one because of this," Harry pleaded and looked desperately at the old man.

"We are not at the point to talk about the one-to-one. We will decide this after your talk with Aiden."

Harry sighed. At least he had a chance for an end of Black Hawk's permanent observation. He liked him, but it was a bit disturbing to have him around all the time.

Black Hawk's expression became darker, but not angry when he thought about the vampire's words. "I never liked that good-for-nothing vampire," he said grumpily.

Severus snorted, but Light Arrow scolded his son. "Manners, Black Hawk. Isaac is part of this family."

"Oh, come on, Light Arrow. You know that those two are closer than Isaac is with anyone else. He is just pissed that Isaac told Harry to ignore his attempts to hinder his meetings with Melissa," Severus said, still grinning, amused, about Black Hawk's sour expression.

"Still I don't like when you speak about your brothers like this, joking or not," Light Arrow said sternly, but ignored Severus' eye-rolling about it. "Back to you, Harry; do you think you are ready to talk with Aiden about what happened?"

Harry nodded. "It isn't even necessary."

"Of course it is necessary. Aiden hurt you badly. He could have been expelled from the camp for it. Hurting someone else is the only reason we would ever send a kid away, Harry," Light Arrow said seriously.

"It wasn't that bad."

"This comment makes me think about not ending the one-to-one." He held his hand up to stop Harry's protest. "I didn't decide about it now. There is still the talk with Aiden to come."

"What about Melissa. Am I allowed to see her?"

"You live in the same house. I think you hardly can avoid it," Black Hawk teased.

"You did a good job of making avoiding possible the last few days," Harry replied grumpily.

"Harry, please stop being angry at Black Hawk for it. He has only your well-being in his mind. Normally we don't allow romantic relationships in the camp. They distract the kids from working on their problems and there is always a big drama if they break up." Light Arrow looked thoughtfully at Harry. "I'm willing to make an exception, but I don't promise anything. First White Cloud and I want to talk with Melissa and you together. After that we will decide if you two are allowed to live out your relationship openly. This doesn't include sex, Harry. Just to make this clear from the beginning." He looked seriously at Harry, not wanting Harry to get any stupid ideas like Draco. He might not speak them out as openly as Draco.

"I won't jump her the moment I get a chance, Light Arrow." Harry pulled a face. "I wouldn't even know how," he mumbled to himself. He hadn't many experiences with girls at all. The kiss with Cho was the most he got in experience concerning girls.

"What Light Arrow meant was that he doesn't want you to jump her at any moment while you are here and under his supervision," Black Hawk said, grinning.

"I think I got what he wants from me without your translation," Harry said, annoyed, and fought the urge to stick his tongue out. After a short angry look at the chuckling Severus, Harry turned to Light Arrow again. "I don't think that Melissa or I will even think about... sex in the next time. We just enjoy being together. She is wonderful, and I can talk to her for hours without getting bored. She knew me very well even before we talked. That's crazy. And... and I feel good when she is around." Harry blushed again.

"Still you have a lot of problems, Harry. Problems you need to work on. That's the reason you are here. As well as Melissa. Your own problem should always be first priority for you, not Melissa's. We are here to help Melissa and you, but we can only do this when you two let us and don't shut us out because you think you two can help each other enough. That's not the case, even so you may think so."

"I don't think I can help Melissa with her problems. She isn't listening to me when I tell her she is beautiful, but should eat a bit more. Sometimes she even gets angry with me." Harry looked sadly down.

"Melissa's problems aren't easy to solve, Harry. I'm glad you realize that your opportunities to help her are limited. Nevertheless I also see the positive things in this relationship. I know Melissa well, and she could have a positive and calming effect on you, and you already seem to make her eat a bit more as the women of this house informed me and I already saw by myself this morning. I just hope it won't change now were you are aware of your own eating problems."

Harry shyly looked from Black Hawk to Severus. They didn't looked surprised, just worried, so Light Arrow must have already informed them. "I'm not like Melissa."

"We will see, Harry. I just see that if you fight us about the amount of food in future or your medication, Melissa won't see a reason to struggle to finish all her meals as well. Maybe she would even start to fight the medication, which could be deadly for her." Never had Harry seen the old man that sad and serious. Melissa situation must be very bad to let him look and talk like this.

Harry gulped. "Is she in danger?"

"God, you had a look at her during the women sweat lodge. She is all skin and bones," Black Hawk said.

"I thought she was beautiful," Harry said, apologizing.

"Beautiful, are you-"

"That's enough, Black Hawk," Light Arrow scolded.

"Hey, it was dark, and we were far away from them. And you dropped that bucket of cold water over us before we could have a closer look."

"Oh, sorry, we didn't give you enough time to ogle at girls and women who wanted their privacy. Next time we men will have a sweat lodge I will give the girl a sitting area very close to the lodge so they can inspect you more closely," Black Hawk said.

"I know it was wrong. Why are you still mad at me?"

"Because you think she is beautiful even though she is half death."

"Black Hawk, that's my last warning. Think about what you say or I don't want you around at talks like this," Light Arrow said angrily.

Harry was shocked. Half death? What were they speaking about? Melissa had stood half in the shadow when he had looked at her during the sweat lodge ceremony. Was it really that bad? Then he could understand Black Hawk's reaction.

Black Hawk grumbled something nobody could understand and looked away.

"So we will speak about you and Melissa during our talk with her. Now I would like to speak with you about this morning and your sickness."

Harry groaned and sank deeper in then fluffy couch. "Do we have to?"

"Yes, Harry. If something makes you so sick that you need to vomit we need to speak about it. Please tell us what triggered it?"

Harry looked over to Black Hawk. Had he already told Light Arrow about it? You never knew with them because Light Arrow would ask Harry to tell him about it either way. "Didn't Black Hawk already tell you about it?"

"Tell me about what?" Light Arrow asked, his expression not giving away the answer to Harry's question.

Harry sighed and then he looked shyly at Severus before he looked down at his hands again.

"Something Hermione wrote made me think about Ron... and then about his parents." Harry had the feeling his throat was squeezed, and he gulped. His breath became more frantic again. All three men stood up at the same time to go over to Harry, but seeing Light Arrow head in Harry's direction, the other two sat down again.

"Harry, there is nothing to panic about at the moment. You are safe here. They are just memories. Try to stay in the here and now." Light Arrow laid his arm around Harry shoulder and gently drew him against his chest. "Breathe calmly."

"I don't want to remember it... them," Harry said miserably.

"But that's the only way to heal, Harry." Light Arrow's chest rumbled while he spoke, and Harry leaned even closer to it.

"The Weasleys, Ron's parents, they were like parents to me, but now I'm responsible for the death of their youngest son." He stopped because the sobs that escaped his throat were making it hard to speak. "They... they tried several times to speak with me, but I refused and I... oh Merlin... I..."His chest burned and the sobs made his words come out unnaturally like squeaks. Harry didn't know if they even understood what he was telling them.

"Shh... calm down, Harry. Sometimes you need to cry all the pain out before you can speak about something. Just cry and only talk when you feel ready for it." Light Arrow petted his head and rubbed his arm. Harry needed almost ten minutes to calm down enough to go on talking, but all the adults remained calm and gave him the time he needed.

"I refused to go to his funeral." After the confession one of his greatest sins, at least in Harry's opinion, Harry hid his face in Light Arrow's chest.

"You weren't ready for it, Harry. They will understand."

Harry shook his head.

"Of what you told me about them, I think they will be very worried at the moment. Can you confirm that, Severus?"

"Yes, they are very worried. They see Harry as their son and only stopped approaching him because Albus asked them to wait for Harry to make the first move."

"I guessed so," Light Arrow said. "Did you hear that, Harry?"

Harry nodded in Light Arrow's chest, not looking up.

"Do you think you are ready to make the first move now?"

Harry shrugged.

"Maybe we should try. How about you write a letter to them?"

Again Harry shrugged.

"I think it is worth a try. Come on, Harry!" He gently pushed the boy away from his chest and summoned a pen and a sheet.

Reluctantly Harry took the pen and gnawed at it while he looked down at the empty sheet.

Hello Mr. and Mrs. Weasley,

He was on first name basis with them, but it didn't feel right now. He didn't know if he still was allowed to address them like that.

I never could say how sorry I am.

A tear fell down on the sheet, but not at a part where he had already written on. A heavy hand was placed on his neck, and he felt more courage now to go on. He wiped his sleeve over his face and went on.

I'm so sorry I couldn't help Ron. I just couldn't. I tried everything! Please believe me!

If I could give my life to make him alive again, I would do it.

The hand on his neck squeezed, and Light Arrow spoke behind him. "Please don't write more things like this. I don't think you will help anybody with this. It's your letter, and I won't stop you if you go on like this, but think about if this is really helping them or you."

Harry sighed.

I really don't know what to tell you. I just wanted to apologize for not speaking with you before and for not being at Ron's funeral. I just couldn't stand it. I felt and still feel too guilty.

Please forgive me.

Harry

Light Arrow rubbed Harry's back while he went over the letter again. Then Harry folded it and gave it to Light Arrow. "Can you send it to them for me?"

"Sure."